A Match for the Mandalore
by Lorelei Jane
Summary: The Mandalore, aka Canderous Ordo, meets his match.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own anything, except Jennet, please don't sue! I just take the characters out to play with sometimes; I promise I'll give them back when I'm done.

Author's note: I got this idea after watching Serenity for the umpteenth time. I liked Canderous when I played both the KOTOR games; I have a soft spot for Alpha males. Anyway, when River decimated the bar, I thought _what would Canderous think if he saw a woman who could fight like that?_ _That wasn't crazy, of course. _This isn't a crossover, however. I'm assuming that Mandalore _is _Canderous for the purpose of this story. I don't have a beta, so I apologize in advance of any typos. I do check over my stories carefully, but you can't always catch everything. Hope you enjoy; please R&R if so inclined, I'd love feedback. - LJ

**Canderous**

I'd come to the cantina in civvies. Everyone aboard the Ebon Hawk had been warned to keep a low profile, if possible. I was armed, and had a shield strapped to my wrist, but I felt almost naked without my armor. Even when you're paying for a woman, however, they tended to be more receptive when you're not encumbered by bulky fibersteel, so I didn't mind much. I stalked into the cantina I'd heard was a local hangout for mercs and other lowlifes, feeling much more at home at this sort of dive than the higher-end bars, and took a table where I could see as much as possible. By habit, I'd noted all probable exits, and who might be real trouble. By the looks of it, about half the bar. I grinned, causing a patron to edge back a little. It was good to be planet side.

I scoped out the joint, especially the women. There were six that were definitely peddling themselves; four of those were Twi'liks. I avoided that race; the women tended to be too fragile physically for my tastes. I'm not cruel sexually, I just didn't want a woman I feel I might break, and I'm not especially good about being gentle. The other two were human, but one had the look of a Spice addict, all skinny bones and sharp angles. The last was obviously bargaining with a potential client. Four more seemed to be a possibility, and two were sturdy-looking wenches. I decided to watch those two a while and look for an opening. The rest of the women present were obviously customers, seated with various groups of thugs.

Three tables down, there was a young blond girl sitting alone, sipping ale, and obviously keeping herself to herself. She looked about twelve, and I grimaced. I hated it when the management let kids in, especially in this sort of place. Brawls were common, and innocent bystanders tended to get hurt – or dead. I made a mental note to keep an eye on her and ordered a double Tatooine firewhiskey.

I'd been there about a half an hour when the mercs walked in. Ignoring everyone, they approached the blond girl purposefully. _Slavers_, I thought savagely, _and damned bold ones too._ If there was anything I hated more than Siths, it was slavers that preyed on children. They appeared to be arguing with the kid. She looked up at them, seemingly…bored? That didn't seem right. Hm. Maybe she was some rich gangster's daughter, slumming, and these were Daddy's bodyguards come to drag her pretty ass home. Six seemed excessive though. Well, better safe than sorry. I activated my shield and slipped my blaster out of its holster, watching the little scene. One wrong move, and I'd kill them all, then drag her scrawny butt back to whatever palace she belonged to. Let her parents sort out their wayward princess.

Then she stood up, and all hell broke loose.

One of the mercs made the mistake of shoving her, and suddenly she _moved._ Gracefully, but so fast it made me almost dizzy to watch, she grasped the offending arm with both hands, yanked it so he stumbled forward, off-balance. Almost lazily, her foot hooked his ankle, her elbow connected with the side of his head and he fell on his ass, stunned. She dove under the table as the other five opened fire, slipped gracefully out among their feet, popped up behind the group, and snagged a vibrosword off the back of one before he knew she was there. With a vicious two-handed slash, she neatly decapitated the original owner of the blade, and turned her attentions to the remaining five.

Most of the other nearby patrons had ducked for cover when the blasters started to roar. I, however, remained stupidly standing, frozen to the spot, staring open-mouthed at the most beautiful sight I've ever beheld. This tiny blonde woman, whom I had dismissed as a child, was taking on six well-armed and armored mercenaries, and winning. She didn't even seem to be breaking a sweat.

The first one she had hit had managed to draw his blaster, but was still dazed and not yet up from the floor. The other three had spun toward her but one was dead before he even got halfway around. The second, apparently an idiot, advanced, blaster blazing, but she danced sidewise and took him out with a thrust through the chest. The moron on the floor hadn't bothered to get up before he commenced firing, but his angle was clumsy and she easily avoided the pulses of energy wildly bursting around her. The merc that was still on his feet was smarter; he retreated a bit, to avoid the deadly blade's slash. She leaped on to the table, graceful as a gazelle, blocked a couple of shots with the humming vibroblade, and launched herself right over the merc's head. Her sword struck straight down through the top of his head as she tumbled over him, using her momentum to smoothly pull the sword free from its bloody sheath. Landing lightly on her feet, she kicked viciously backwards, catching Floor-boy in the gut as he struggled to stand. He went down again, gasping, and she whipped around, slashing him across the face and almost taking the top of his skull off. He was dead before he hit the floor – again.

She spun around, scanning for other attackers. Across the room, another wave of mercs had just taken position. They took aim, blaster fire erupted again, and she _danced_ through it, blocking some with the vibroblade, mostly avoiding being hit by simply not being there when the bolt of energy whizzed by.

_All right, that's enough._ I snapped out of my thrall and aimed my blaster at this new threat to the blonde goddess in front of me. I dropped three of the assholes before I spotted two small ovals flying toward her. _Oh shit, grenades._

Faster than I could blink, she dropped her blade and almost casually plucked the tiny bombs from the air. She chucked them with deadly accuracy back at the group of mercs who had thrown them, leaped like a gymnast onto her table again, and bounded across three tables straight at me. I didn't even have time to duck before she hit me full in the chest just as the grenades went off.

Flying pieces of debris filled the air and a large chunk of something struck her hard in the back of the head as we fell. She went limp, and I had the wind partly knocked out of me by a combination of her dead weight and the plasma grenade's backlash. But a good deal of the blast was absorbed by my shield, so I was able to recover quickly. Without stopping to think about my motives, I scrambled to my feet, threw the unconscious woman over my shoulder, and barreled toward the brand-new hole in the wall of the cantina. My exit was more or less concealed by smoke and chaos. What remained of the mercenaries squelched under my feet as I ran out.

Once on the street, I quickly got my bearings, then headed in a random direction. I sped around buildings, through alleys, backtracked a couple of times, and holed up in a dark doorway when I was satisfied we weren't being pursued. By this time, she was starting to stir, coughing. I set her down carefully, holstered my blaster, and checked her over for damage. Nothing except a lump at the base of her skull; that was gonna hurt like a bitch when she noticed it, but certainly nothing to worry about. She opened her eyes, blinked, then leaped to her feet, instantly on guard.

"Who the fuck are you?" She wheezed.

"My name is Canderous Ordo." Now, why did I use my given name? Well, too late now. "Nice work back there," I jerked a thumb over my shoulder. "Who the fuck are _you_?" I mimicked back at her.

"Name's Jennet Jax." She coughed a little more. "What the hell have I been smoking?"

"What's left of the cantina. You got knocked out, and I didn't want to stick around for awkward questions. Kid, you sure as hell can fight. No chance you're a Mandolorian?" Rhetorical question; she was far too tiny to be of my race.

"No." She took a few clean breaths, and shook her head, wincing. "Learned from a couple, though. Look, I think my head's going to fall off. Got any kolto packs?"

"Sorry, not on me. No Mandalorian taught you _that_. We fight well, but that was…beautiful," I said, almost lamely, the word unfamiliar in my mouth. But I couldn't come up with anything that was better; she _had_ been beautiful. Still was, come to that, if skinny, not to mention about half my mass – and age.

"Thanks."

We regarded each other a moment.

"So what in the name of Kobald's balls was that all about?" I asked, eyebrow cocked. "And why did you throw yourself at me? Not that I minded," I added with a lewd smirk, partly to get a rise out of her, mostly because it was true.

"Cute." She didn't seem impressed. "Well, you were the only one still standing and I thought man, what's this stupid asshole doing, trying to get his head blown off? You had your blaster drawn, and I figured if you were trying to help me, I better get your hulking ass out of the way of the plasma blast, and if you were trying to kill me, I'd disarm you and kill you first. I didn't account for getting knocked out." She smiled. "Glad you weren't trying to kill me."

"Well, it would be an honor to do battle with you, but killing you would be a real shame. I've never seen anyone fight like that."

"So why in the name of Kobald's balls did you help me?" she mimicked at me, smirking.

"I don't really know. Curiosity, mostly, I guess. So, what _was_ that about?"

"Persistent bastard, aren't you?"

"Yep."

"I'm a bounty hunter. I'm good at what I do, and sometimes people take exception."

"You got a ship, or are you local?"

"Not any more. I sort of crashed when I got here. Ship's totally trashed. I sold what I could for salvage, but it wasn't enough. I've been trying to get off this cesspit of a planet for months. I've been hunting to get enough credits to buy a ship or book passage. I've got enough now, but problem is, who's selling: the Exchange, or the Hutts. They don't like me very much. Haven't seen an independent freighter or passenger ship in weeks."

"They don't like me much either. Listen, I've got…friends," the word still sounded strange to me, "and they have a ship. We could use someone like you, if you'd like to tag along." A thought struck me. "If you knew you were being hunted, why the fuck did you go to a place like that unarmed?"

She smiled sweetly. "Did I look unarmed to you?"

She had a point. I just crossed my arms, though, and glowered.

She sighed. "Nah, you're right. I wouldn't have been, but my apartment got blown up a couple of hours ago. Lost everything but what I was wearing. I've kept my credits on my person at all times for the last month, in case I heard of a ship; then I could just pay and go. I had a line on one and was supposed to meet the captain. Can we say set up?"

"Pretty stupid to leave the apartment at all without so much as a dagger."

"I didn't," she said shortly.

"Ah. And you didn't buy a blade or blaster before you went in….why?"

She looked at me coolly. "No time. You're either an off-worlder or an idiot if you don't know who owns all the weapons shops, and it takes a while to find anyone on the street that's willing to sell to me. I don't kill strangers on the street for their weapons. Now, if I had met someone with murder on their minds on the way to my meeting, I would have been pleased to make them dead first, and arm myself as a happy side effect. But trouble never hits when it's convenient."

"Ain't that the truth," I agreed, grinning. I was really beginning to _like_ this girl. A born killer with a sense of honor, and none of the hypocrisy of those irritating jetti. And she didn't edge away when I smiled.

"I was pretty sure I _was_ being set up, but I had to take the chance the ship might be legit." She sighed again. "I _should _have thought to keep my weapons on me, but fer Gods' sake a girl needs to sleep sometime. Or shower. I had a beautiful blade, and that blaster cost a damn fortune," she said wistfully.

"I see. Well, as I said, I have friends, and a ship, and that ship has some kolto, if you want to patch up and talk it over with the rest of the crew."

"What do you get out of this?"

"A chance to spar with you."

She grinned widely. "Deal."

I tossed the vibroblade that had been sheathed on my back at her. "Take this, just in case. Let's go."


	2. Chapter 2

Author's note: Thanks to Aeryn and LatinSpaceAngel for pointing out that Bao Dur is Iridonian. I've corrected it now :0)

Also, thanks for the reviews, I hope people are enjoying the story and continue to comment. I appreciate feedback!

- LJ

**

* * *

****Jennet**

We reached Canderous's friends without incident, much to my relief. I've fought my way out of tough spots far more badly injured, but I never like having to fight with a headache. And this was a doozy. If it hadn't been for my healing abilities, I would probably be in a coma right now. As it was, I was sure I had been concussed, and badly, when Canderous had hauled me out of the cantina. My head wouldn't feel like a Bantha had stomped on it now, and I would never have remained unconscious so long otherwise.

I was feeling a bit apprehensive about all this. I didn't really know who this big, craggy, growly-voiced guy was, beyond the name he had given me. If it's even his real name, for that matter, although I was pretty sure it was. He was definitely left of center on the Light/Dark side struggle – I'd checked his aura as soon as I'd opened my eyes – But he wasn't _dark_. He was actually on the light side, if not burning brightly, and there were red streaks in his aura that indicated some very, very bad things. But he seemed sincere, and if he really did have a ship that could get me out of here, I didn't mind being flexible. And he _had_ saved my life.

I also wanted to get to the ship quickly because of the promised kolto. It's not as good a cure as my own internal healing, but it's a lot more immediate and easier to explain. Canderous here might look like a big dumb thug, but he was smarter than he let on, and he most definitely was a warrior. He would know how long it takes to get over a big bump on the head without medical assistance. Luckily, he'd been too busy getting us the hell out of the cantina to notice just how big a dent was in my skull at the time. But if I didn't get some kolto to cover my tracks fairly soon, I was going to have to start pretending to have a headache, and believe me, it's harder than you think.

We entered the ship, me walking a few steps behind, holding my hand to my temple in a show of post-battle pain. As soon as I entered, I felt my spirits sink. Oh, fer shit's sake, the place was _riddled_ with Jedi. I counted six before I blocked myself entirely. What's _this_ guy doing here?

"Everyone, this is Jennet Jax. Found her in a cantina, kicking the ass of a platoon of mercenaries. She's in a bit of a bind, and an incredible fighter. I brought her along, thought we could use her in this crusade of yours."

I waved at the assembled crowd, moaning a little and clutching my head with a show of intense, not entirely feigned, pain. "Hi," I managed a battle-weary tone. "Sorry to impose. Got any kolto?"

A huge blue Iridonian with kind eyes said, "Come here, we'll get you patched up in no time," and led me to the infirmary. He broke open a kolto pack, and I snatched it from him before he could touch me. I plastered it to the back of my head, and sighed in relief. The familiar tingling sensation prickled along my scalp, and I felt the bump, significantly smaller than when Canderous had seen it I was sure, begin to shrink, then disappear. The Iridonian, Bao Dur I think he said, handed me a couple of pills and a glass of water. I took those gratefully, and drained the glass thirstily. I groaned in satisfaction of one suddenly free from pain.

"Better?" Bao Dur asked, amusement in his eyes.

"Shit yeah." The tingling had intensified to a low burn, then was gone. I tossed the used kolto pack back at him, and he caught it, smoothly dumping it into the incinerator in the same move. I smiled at him. "Thanks a lot."

"No problem. Let's get you properly introduced to the rest of us." I followed him out to the main cabin, where there were seven people, including Canderous, and three droids crowded around. A woman in a red robe and a veil over her eyes unfolded a spare chair for me, and I sat, flashing her a smile. She smiled back warmly. With a small shock I realized she was blind. So how the hell did she know I had smiled? Well, maybe she didn't and was just being friendly. I dismissed it, filing it away mentally for something to figure out later.

Then a gorgeous, poised woman with dark red hair and the straight-backed but relaxed stance that marked her as a warrior of considerable talent, spoke. "Welcome to the Ebon Hawk, Jennet. I'm afraid you've caught us at a …trying…time." Her voice was honey running over a steel blade, but I could feel the burning brightness of her, even blocking as I was. I found myself wanting to follow that voice anywhere she led. I internally shook off the feeling. She was not only a powerful Jedi, I was certain, but without a doubt the leader of this gang. "I'm Ladria Windbreak.

"This," she indicated a tall, handsome, dark-haired man with deep brown eyes and a careless smile, "is Atton Rand, our pilot. You've met Bao Dur, engineer," Even looking at him across the room, the Iridonian was _big. _Well over two meters tall, pale blue skin, four short horns spaced evenly over his skull, tribe tattoos peeking over the collar of his shirt, and the gentlest eyes I have ever seen. And a Jedi. Interesting. He smiled at me with genuine warmth. I smiled back, involuntarily charmed. There was some sort of probe hovering about a meter behind him. I'd noticed in the infirmary that it seemed to follow him around. "And Probe, his constant companion," Ladria said. The little ball of metal beeped in a friendly sort of way. I nodded back and smiled.

"Mira Starr," another redhead, lighter, bright as new copper. She smiled, a quick, tight, assessing expression. My eyes widened as I registered the name.

"Oh my Gods, really? _The_ Mira Starr? Girl, you are such a legend around here! It's an honor to meet you," I said sincerely. Mira Starr was _the_ most kick-ass bounty hunter on Nar Shadaa in decades. She didn't look any older than me, but was much taller, standing only five or so centimeters shorter than Atton. She was slim but hard-bodied and definitely looked like she could handle anything.

"Likewise," she answered rather shortly. She didn't look any more welcoming, but at least wasn't outright hostile.

"Visas Mar," Ladria continued, and the red-robed beauty that had given me my chair bowed slightly. I inclined my head back, returning the respect given. She stood about Mira's height and held herself like a queen. "And Disciple." Wow, another looker, this one blond, not quite as tall as Atton. He was a bit of a puzzle. He had a strong body, burlier than Atton's slim but well-muscled frame, but was not as barrel-chested and broad as Canderous. His stance and relaxed air of competence indicated he could handle himself in a fight, but he had the dreamy blue eyes of a scholar. He was standing closest to me, and made as if to take my hand. I stood to avoid it, and smiled brilliantly. He settled for a courtly bow, and murmured "Enchanted."

I'd never heard anyone talk like that, and suppressed the urge to laugh. He was so dignified and proper, yet friendly as a stray Gizka. I couldn't laugh at him, it would be, well, mean. I bowed solemnly back instead, and hoped he didn't see my mouth twitching.

"You've obviously met Mandalore." He stood, arms crossed, a surly look on his face. I wasn't really surprised at it, and didn't take offense. Most Mandalorians are uncomfortable around anyone but their own kind. Then it hit me – _Mandalore? _I looked up at him, astonished, and he shot me a fierce look, willing me to silence. I blanked my face, and gave him a minute nod. I saw his shoulders relax very slightly. Another thing to file away in my untidy mental datapad.

"This droid is HK-47," I had noticed the assassin droid almost as soon as I boarded and was still puzzling why something like that was with these people. He obviously was an older model, and I hoped to Gods they kept him in check.

"Welcoming statement: You look like a capable meatbag. Inquiry: Does my master need me to kill her?"

Ladria sighed wearily. "No, HK-47, I order you not to harm her. Can you stop with the killing thing?" For the first time, this incredible woman seemed, well, normal.

"Resigned obedience: as you wish, Master. Hopeful inquiry: perhaps you might need me to kill her later? Proud statement: I could do so in various and efficient ways if you so require."

I looked up at Canderous; his mouth was twitching. He seemed to find the droid hilarious. I grinned, and he started, then smiled back like he hadn't meant to.

Ladria scowled and said firmly, "_No_, HK-47, you will _not_ be required to kill our guest. Now shut up."

"Resigned obedience: As you wish, Master."

Ladria looked at me and said, "Sorry about him. We found him on board, and I had no idea what he was. I stupidly fixed him, partly to hone my repair skills, and well…he _is_ an asset in battle, and hasn't killed anyone I didn't want him to. So far," she said in resignation.

I gave her my best reassuring smile and said, "No problem."

"This little guy is T3; he's our maintenance droid," more friendly beeps, "and Go-To." I noticed she didn't mention his function, and filed that away too. Go-To didn't speak, or beep, and I decided not to acknowledge him either.

"So," said Ladria, eyeing me kindly, "how can we help you?"

I took a deep breath, and recounted my story as I had told Canderous. I wasn't sure at all I wanted to be among a pack of Jedi; I'd spent my whole life avoiding them. All but Canderous here were of the Order and I knew they would make me sooner or later. That's why I avoided anyone touching me; it's harder to shield if there's physical contact. If I stayed, I'd have to come clean, and I was so used to keeping a low profile amongst the Force-sensitive that I wasn't sure I was ready to stop. Plus, I would be _damned_ if I let my parents down and became one myself.

_I'm much too old,_ I reassured myself fiercely. _They wouldn't train me anyway. But what else would they do with a Jedi trained Force-sensitive, I wonder? Jennet, you've gotten yourself into a fine mess now_.

"So…" I concluded, "Mandalore got me out, and brought me here. If you're heading anywhere I can buy a ship, I'll be out of your hair in no time. I can pay for my passage," I added hastily.

Ladria looked at me thoughtfully, and the rest of the assembly seemed to be quietly watchful. Finally, she spoke. "I'm afraid we're not heading anywhere useful to you," she said, that honey-and-steel voice regretful.

I felt my hope of leaving this Godsforsaken planet deflate. "Well," I said brightly, "Too bad. I did promise Mandalore a sparring session, though. You ready?" I looked over at him, and he nodded. "Thanks for the kolto," I said generally. "It was great to meet you all. It's – amazing – to find truly nice people in this shithole."

There were murmurs of farewell and regret all around, and I made my way through the crowd, following Canderous to the cargo hold. Bao-Dur objected, claiming he had too many parts laying around here and in the garage for us to effectively spar.

"Would it be too dangerous for you to do this outside?" he asked in that soft voice.

"Nah, I'm pretty sure after the cantina thing there's not many left that will try to bag me. Not today, at least." I said.

Canderous and I headed toward the hatch, and to my horror everyone seemed to follow. I groaned inwardly. _Shit, I'm going to have to throw the match. I better be good enough so he doesn't catch me._ But I knew in my heart I was screwed. No way I was going to display my Jedi training to these people; I'd be made before I could throw the first punch. But if I didn't, I'd probably lose; Canderous was more than twice my mass and a likely a damn fine fighter, especially if he really was the Mandalore. He was quick too, astonishingly so for a man his size. I'd seen it in his movement and had gotten flashes from him as we had made our way to the ship. _How the fuck am I going to pull this off?_

We faced each other, and stretched. I decided to use basic Mandalorian hand-to-hand combat. I had been taught well, and it would be a mark of respect to Canderous to fight in his natural style. If I was lucky, he might be just arrogant enough to accept my defeat at face value. We slowly started circling, and watched each other carefully for an opening. He came at me fast, and I stepped aside, grabbing his arm and using his own momentum to flip him. He anticipated that, and had his feet under him, wrenching himself upright almost before I had let go his arm. His leg shot out, and I stepped closer, avoiding the leg and aiming a punch at his stomach, ready to spring back as soon as I connected, while at the same time bumping hard sideways with my hip to try and throw him off balance. They usually don't expect that, but no, Canderous was on his toes. Before I hit flesh, he sharply heaved his body around, trying get a handhold, his foot attempting to tangle my ankles. I was almost shoved off my feet, but managed to hang on.

I used my gut punch instead for leverage, knowing I wouldn't get in a good blow but needing to regain my center of gravity. I shoved hard off his abdomen, letting my body fly backwards, flinging my head back and pushing hard with my feet against the ground to propel me into a walkover, coming up fast and dropping back into a defensive crouch. Anyone else that might have at least partially knocked the wind out of; he looked almost bored. We exchanged moves for a while, assessing each other, and suddenly, I saw him do almost exactly what the merc at the cantina had done. Deliberately, he shoved at me, with his body held exactly the same as that idiot dead mercenary. It was an ungraceful move, completely unworthy of any Mandalorian. I knew what Canderous was doing; he was trying to trigger me into my fight mode. Ah shit, he wasn't buying this at all.

Fine then: I'd give him some of what he was looking for. I grabbed the arm as I had done then, pulled it sharply forward and swept my foot behind his ankle. And it didn't budge. His foot was immobile; I might as well kick a landing strut on a docked ship. The bastard had baited me, and I'd walked right in to it. Well, I _was_ trying to lose, wasn't I? He kicked backward, and my leg went wide. I hopped on my other leg, letting it follow the first, sliding to the ground and jackknifing my body around his legs, grabbing anything I could get my hands on and yanking. He fell, but not on top of me. I sprang at him, and he snagged me and rolled. Now it came down to strength and weight, and he had both. A brief struggle and a good show of squirming on my part, and he got me pinned down, his mass solidly keeping me pressed to the ground. Suddenly, one hand was at my throat, the other holding my wrists over my head in a crushing grip, and he looked furious.

"What the _fuck_ is your game, kid?" he roared in my face. I looked at him as innocently as possible with his big hand squeezing my neck.

"Don't know what you're talking about," I wheezed. I tried for a vanity play, what the hell. "Damn, you're good, big guy."

He was having none of it. Not taking his hand from my throat, he hauled me upright. Quick as thought, he picked me up, and dragged me by main force into the Ebon Hawk. The crowd behind us followed, fascinated, I'm sure. I was in deep shit, and I knew it.

He strode with quick angry steps to the main cabin, sat down with me firmly in his lap, and held me as tightly as any restraints. I struggled briefly, just to see if it would take him off guard, but unsurprisingly, I was stuck. He was an unmoving wall, and I was his prisoner.

"Now," he growled, "You're going to explain to me why you threw that fight."


	3. Chapter 3

"I didn't," I protested, innocent as all hell. I even batted my eyelashes. Aw, aren't I cute? I already figured he wouldn't be swayed by my, er, charms, but what the hell, might as well have fun while your life is going down the shithole.

"You sure as shit did," he shot back, unimpressed. "Why?"

Atton, who was across the room, laughed uproariously. He chortled until tears ran down his face, and I turned and glared at him. "Oh, you are _good_," he snickered, trying to get his breath back. "But you have _so _picked the wrong crowd to try this on. By all means, continue the show. I haven't been so entertained in months."

"I was thinking the same thing," Mira was laughing almost as hard as Atton. Wonderful. Other women's humiliation is what made her laugh.

I sniffed scornfully, and raised my chin. "We fought; I lost. End of story." I wasn't giving an inch. "And now this big, dumb son of a nerfherder is pissed off for no discernable reason." I squirmed again, just to see him irritated. "Let GO of me, you oaf!"

"No."

I tried going limp and slithering out; he just gripped me tighter until breathing became an issue. I stilled, and his grip loosened only enough for me to draw air easily. The whole time, I had been thinking furiously, planning and discarding possible stories to placate this stone wall I was penned in _and_ his friends.

Ladria's voice cut through the room. She didn't look mad, more entertained, but not as amused as Atton and Mira, who were both still chuckling. The rest of them bore various expressions: Visas, regal and remote, Disciple a bit suspicious, Bao Dur serene, his eyes twinkling. Canderous, when I sneaked a peek, looked thunderous.

"It looks like we're at an impasse. Jennet, we are at a loss here why Mandalore is insisting you lost on purpose, and is mad about it. I do know that he respects warriors, and said you were 'an incredible fighter,' which is very high praise from him. So I must conclude you did lose on purpose; he would know. We have a few choices: you can explain, and leave; explain, and stay; not explain, and leave. I'm afraid if you stay we'll insist on an explanation; it's never a good idea to have crew members live in suspicion of each other."

There was a general snort of irony I didn't understand from almost everyone. I thought I heard someone mutter, "Kriea". Great, yet another piece of information to mull on later. But it didn't matter, did it, I wasn't staying.

Was I?

"Mandalore, is there any chance you'll let Jennet up?" Ladria asked. I batted my eyelashes again, to be as annoying as possible.

"No."

"I could order you to as captain."

"You could try," he snarled.

"Hey now…" Atton started to protest, looking angry. Ladria cut him off with a gesture.

"No, Atton, he's not being insubordinate; just stubborn. I don't blame him," she added with a touch of a smile. "I'm curious myself." She continued to look at me, as if thinking something over. As if she had come to some decision, she said, "Let us tell you our story, and maybe then you'll be willing to tell yours."

There was a storm of objections. Atton started shouting about missions and trust issues, Mira chiming in with her own brand of paranoia. Visas seemed willing to hear me out, but not necessarily to trust me yet. Disciple was talking fast about Jedi trust, and the sanctity of something or other. Canderous remained mutinously silent, and I listened to the babble with growing fascination. What in hell's bells was going _on_ here? After a while, I gave up trying to make any sense of it.

The debate raged for a bit. As the meaningless voices babbled on, I was suddenly aware of just how comfortable Canderous's lap was. Completely without guile, I snuggled a bit, and closed my eyes, letting the tide of words wash around me. I felt his arms tighten just a little and opened my eyes to his blue stare. For just a moment, there was no anger or secrets between us. Well secrets, okay, sure, but he could tell that I wasn't trying to get the edge on him, and I could tell that he was mad, yeah, but not necessarily for the reasons I had thought. He didn't think me an infiltrator; he thought I had tried to humiliate him by letting him win. I tried to signal with my eyes that no, that wasn't what I had been up to. He seemed to understand, a little, and I felt a lot of the tension go out of his body. I snuggled a little more, and felt something stir within him. Or maybe on him. I grinned, and winked. He may be twice my age, but he was a damn fine specimen of manhood. I was flattered.

He looked down, seemed to lose some sort of battle with himself, and chuckled in my ear, "You've got guts, kid. And style, too." I smiled back, and closed my eyes again. He was a little overwhelming at close range, and being nice.

Bao Dur had said nothing during the shitstorm, but they all stopped at his quiet "I agree with you, General."

My eyes popped open. She was a _General_? Shit, and the fun just keeps coming.

"_General?_" I yelped involuntarily.

Ladria made a dismissive gesture. "I'm not one anymore, and it's a long story."

"Um, okay," I said uncertainly. I looked up at Canderous again, who just shrugged.

Finally the hubbub died down, and Ladria, with help from everyone, laid out their situation. It took forever, and Canderous refused to let me up the whole time. I was starting to be afraid I was going to disgrace myself. I'd been sitting in one spot for more than three hours, and my bladder was now at the screaming point.

There was an expectant hush as the story ended, and everyone looked at me. I stared around, and they all waited for my next words with seemingly bated breath.

I said brightly, "Can I use the 'fresher, please?"

There was a surprised silence, and most of them laughed. Canderous, predictably, didn't.

"No," he said flatly.

I turned around and met his gaze full on. "I give my word as a warrior I won't run," I said, dead serious.

He seemed to consider that.

"No."

I scowled and snapped, "Fine then, let me wet myself here, on you, I don't mind sharing. Fer Gods' sake, you can stand outside the door!"

Apparently seeing the logic of this, he stood up, still toting my carcass, and settled the matter by carrying me in, setting me on my feet, and standing outside the door. Pins and needles shot painfully up and down my legs from being forced to sit in one position for so long. My knees were shaking too, largely from the emotional impact of what I had been told. Stubbornly, I was determined not to let my knees buckle until the door was closed. They gave, but I made it, collapsing after I didn't have a witness. I sat a moment until my legs could hold me up, and then went about my business. At last I was alone, bladder relieved, head spinning, stomach churning. I was trembling all over, and suddenly felt sick. I made it to the toilet just in time. Mercifully, I hadn't eaten much today. I hoped Canderous couldn't hear me through the steel door.

After my unscheduled purge, I felt a little better. I rinsed my mouth, and even found some breath spray to kill the awful taste. I washed my hands, dried them, and realized I'd delayed as long as I dared. I opened the door. Without comment, Canderous picked me up again and hauled me back to the common room.

I was starting to get used to this form of transport. I wiggled a little, because I could, and shamelessly snuggled. He was big, and strong, and even when mad, he unaccountably made me feel safe. I rather liked the feeling. Besides, it seemed to annoy him when I flirted. He breathed in my ear, "You are an annoying woman. I should have let you wet yourself." and I whispered back, "Back at you, Big Boy." I fluttered my lashes yet again, and made my brown eyes big and innocent. He snorted. So much for seduction.

I had succeeded in distracting myself with this little scene for a few precious moments. Now, I had some decisions to make. I looked at all of them, and was terrified at what they had told me. But a few salient points had come to mind, and that made things easier, at least for me.

I looked at Ladria, and asked abruptly, "So the Jedi council is gone?"

"Yes," she said simply.

"Assuming you win, what will happen to the Jedi that are still alive?"

"I…" she faltered. "I honestly don't know. I suppose some sort of order will be restored eventually. By who, I've no idea."

"You, probably. Or Revan. Or both. Is that why you've been recruiting Jedi, even people that are as old as your little group?" I waved a hand around.

"I hadn't thought of it like that." Her voice was quiet.

"Well, you should." I said.

She considered this. "I suppose you're right."

"It looks to me like there isn't much of a choice for anyone. We either go and fight this thing and win, or everything's gone."

Ladria's gaze sharpened. "We?"

"Yeah, I'm in." It took everything I had not to throw up again; I was scared shitless. I just knew Canderous could feel me trembling. Suddenly, I didn't care. Only a supreme idiot wouldn't be scared.

Proving my point, Canderous said, "I knew you were as brave as a Mandolorian."

Aw, ain't that sweet. Moron.

"Okay…" I took a shaky breath, and let it out slow. "I'm sure none of you are right on the old 'trust without proof or reservation' land speeder. So I guess I better come clean."

And with that, I quit blocking my Force abilities from others, and shifted my sight. I had seen Canderous's aura earlier, but to my surprise there was more brightness there than before. There was a serene center to him that I hadn't noticed the first time. Since 'serene' is not a word I would use to describe him, I wasn't sure what to make of it. I dismissed it for now, putting it in the ever-growing pile of 'think about it later' files.

Atton's aura would have been bewildering, if I hadn't heard most of his story. It was pure, bright blue-white with ugly slashes of red and black that were starting to fade, but I knew wouldn't completely go away. Bao Dur's was much the same, but with far less black. Mira's…was interesting. Mostly blue-white, the red mixed in here and there, as if she had only done evil when pushed. But the brightness was less than Atton's or Bao Dur's, and only a smidge brighter than Canderous's. Disciple's was the most predictable of the bunch; blue-white, bright but not wildly intense. He had hardly any red, but his white was washed out somehow, as if he'd gotten there mostly by following rules and not necessarily being in the daily struggle of choices. There was, however, some great potential there; a glimmer showed brightly around the edges. Visas's was brighter than anyone's but Ladria's, but surrounded by red, as if it had been all red once, and the white had been slowly expanding outward from the center. Curious.

Ladria's now…it was bright, shining, blinding white, not even a touch of blue, and the red and black were only shadows churning through like spent storm clouds. I was awed by the good I saw, and felt almost ashamed.

Almost.

There was a collective gasp from the Jedi, followed by an irritable "What?" from Canderous. I looked at him. "I'm sorry. You can't feel it, really, but I've just shown them my connection to the Force."

He literally threw me off his lap. I landed hard, wincing.

"You're _JETTI_?" he roared at me. He was so _good_ at that roaring thing. I hadn't stood on my own feet for hours, I wasn't sure I could now, yet. So I sat on the floor on my bruised ass and laughed at him. He didn't seem to appreciate my humor.

"Nope."

I could tell all of them were checking out my aura, and dimly heard their murmurs as they diagnosed me behind my back. Well, okay, in front of my face. I didn't mind; I did invite it, after all. But it was hard, harder than even I thought it would be, to expose myself like this. So I concentrated on Canderous, the one person that couldn't judge me by it. Besides, he was the only one that was pissed off about it so far.

"My mother and my father were both Jedi. They left the order, all right and proper, well as much as _that _could be, I suppose…I don't know exactly how they did it. They married, and had me. As soon as I was born, they knew I had both of their abilities. Well, neither of them had been on great terms with the Order, and didn't want them coming along and taking me away. They thought it was barbarous to separate a child from its parents. But, they also knew that Force sensitive with no training, living with two fairly powerful Force sensitives, would be extremely damaging to me, not to mention potentially dangerous to anyone around me. So…they trained me themselves. I had an insanely happy childhood, believe me.

"The earliest memories I have is my Dad teaching me how to block my abilities from others, so I wouldn't be noticed by Jedi. It was his special talent; that, and fighting. I think that ability had something to do with him leaving the order; I'm not sure. Anyway, he gave me my first sword, made of wood, and taught me how to use the Force to anticipate my opponent's moves. Mother…" I swallowed. It had been a long time since I had talked about her to anyone else. "She was an empath, a healer. She taught me to keep healing power always inside me, how to use it on myself and others, and how not to get caught. I've got every trick up my sleeve on that; mostly I just tell people it wasn't as bad as it looked when they stop bleeding. That, and carry around lots of kolto packs. It's amazing how much you can heal on a person when they're distracted and screaming in pain.

"I was twelve when my father died. There was a horrible battle somewhere, and he was in the thick of it. My mother hadn't been there; we were off-planet at the time. She blamed herself for his death, because she hadn't been there to heal him. He could do some, of course, all Jedi can I guess. But they usually fought together, Mom backing him up and steadily sending healing around so everyone, especially Dad, could keep fighting. And she wasn't there when he died. She just…sort of faded away after that. When I was eighteen, and she was satisfied I could survive on my own, she just…died.

"So…I was alone, and a good fighter, and had this weird ability to heal myself without trying very hard. I didn't want to become a soldier; the Republic works hand in hand with the Order - too much chance of a Jedi noticing me. Plus, I don't follow rules all that well. So I became a mercenary. I traveled around, learning new things about fighting from anyone who would teach me. I wasn't kidding about the Mandolorians earlier; they taught me some fantastic stuff. I didn't stay anywhere long, because someone might notice how…off...I was, and start asking questions. The last thing I wanted was to get a reputation, and have the Jedi knock on my door, or an assassin trying to make a name for themselves. But I couldn't just sit around and play Happy Homemaker either. I had abilities, and training; not to use them would be a waste, and disrespectful to what my parents had taught me. I sort of drifted around, helping people when I could, taking on bounties that weren't totally slimy, fighting where I could get paid and felt that the cause wasn't corrupted. Then I came here. You know the rest."

I looked at Canderous, and his face was inscrutable. He stood up, and walked out without saying a word. Guess the honeymoon's over. I sighed.

I looked at Ladria, and asked, "So, where do I bunk? And would it be awful of me to ask someone to buy me some clothes, and weapons? I can't go to the shops." I knew everyone had heard my story, and wanted to ask questions, but I had had enough for now. Screw it. I was in, and they could ask later.

"Of course," Ladria said. You're only a couple of inches shorter than me, and look about the same size. I'll go do that with Mira. If you don't mind?" she cocked an eyebrow at Mira, who nodded.

"Me too," Atton chimed in. "Can I help pick out underthings?" There was a note I didn't understand in his voice, and Ladria, amazingly, blushed. Well, well, well. Seems some Jedi aren't as uptight as I thought. Good for them.

"Fuck you, Rand," I said pleasantly, tossed credits at Ladria, and went to go find a bunk. I heard Atton's laughter behind me as I walked down the corridor. I flopped down, and was asleep in moments.


	4. Chapter 4

Author's note: If you've read this far, you might have noticed a few things that I got wrong. I'm not sure what all of them are, having only played KOTOR and KOTORII only once each. I was blown away by the game, especially the character development, which is why I wrote this in the first place. So, a few points:

1) I've made reference to Earth creatures that probably don't exist in the SW universe. I had no clue what graceful creature would be the SW equivalent of a gazelle, for instance. I probably should have made it up, but hey, I'm writing for Earthlings anyway, right? Recently, though, LatinSpaceAngel pointed out an online Star Wars encyclopedia of sorts to me; thanks for the tip, it will help a lot!

2) Obviously, I'm assuming Canderous _is_ Mandalore. Why no one knows his given name is explained later.

3) I've set this just after Kriea killed the Jedi Masters on Dantooine, but before they head to Telos. Why they come back to Nar Shadaa and seem to stay so long...I just figured heroes need some R&R before they go save the universe, and probably get killed.

Anyway, I hope you're enjoying the story. Please review, I love feedback

Thanks,

LJ

**Canderous**

_The little bitch is a jetti!_ The idea buzzed around in my head, maddening and humiliating. I had actually started to like her. I mean, really _like _her. Sure, she's skinny, and short, and tiny; she looked like she'd blow over in a strong wind. But I had seen her fight, and knew her strength. She wouldn't break easily, even with someone like me.

She even made me laugh, in front of people. She had made me feel _good_, not out of place as I felt with the pack of idealistic hero-types I had found myself with. Like someone appreciated that not everyone had to be charming to be worth a shit.

_She_ had seemed to like _me_.

_I'm the Mandalore_, I reminded myself. _I don't need to be liked._

It was perfectly true, as far as that went. I didn't honestly care if I was liked by anyone, even my own men. Respect was enough, my honor was my self-worth. I was content, even happy, with the way I looked at things.

_She's a damned jetti._

Here I thought I had found nearly the perfect woman: brave, smart, strong, one hell of a fighter, and funny to boot. I even, I admitted to myself, had thought about her in a permanent way, a mate. I've known her about eight hours, and she's an outlander, and she'd never look at me that way. But for a moment, I had wanted it.

And it's all an illusion, jetti tricks to make her better than she was without them. She couldn't take me in a fair fight. I had a sneaking suspicion I was wrong about that, but shoved it aside savagely.

Tired of thinking about it already, I stomped out of the Ebon Hawk, wanting to walk off my rage. Better yet, find some slimy bully terrorizing a local and kill him. A cantina brawl would be even better.

As luck would have it, I wasn't allowed to go alone. Bao Dur had quietly slipped out after me, and was matching my pace without effort. He didn't say anything right away. It was one of the reasons I respected him more than most of the others; he knew when to keep his mouth shut. He didn't speak unless there was something to say, and generally it was worth listening to, even if I didn't agree with him. Unlike Atton, who spoke sometimes just to hear his fool voice, and Disciple, who was so earnest and eager I could hardly be in the same room with him. I had seen him handle a light saber though, and I knew where it counted, he was a good man. Same with Atton, although it stuck in my craw to admit it. Disciple at least kept out of my way, while Atton seemed to delight in irritating me. He was brave, I'll give him that; he never let my temper make him back down.

After about six blocks of brooding silence, which I was just as happy to continue, Bao Dur said, "Jennet's quite a woman, isn't she?"

To the point. That's what I like about Bao Dur, yes indeed. He could go fuck himself. I snarled something deliberately incomprehensible and unflattering. But I didn't hit him. Give me some credits, here.

Unflappable as always, the Indolorian actually smiled. I scowled back, and continued my stomping. Okay, I knew I was bordering on childish. I didn't care. I kept stomping. Threw in a few creative curses too, just to break up the pattern.

"Pretty, too."

I stopped stomping, but continued my pace. I refused to say anything about Jennet's attributes that didn't involve deceitful, crafty, annoying, smart-mouthed, or jetti in the description. I added a few more filthy adjectives to my opinion of her. Bao Dur smiled some more. I hadn't stopped scowling, so I didn't bother to change my expression when I looked at him.

"And," he continued as if hadn't said a word, "I'd love to see this 'incredible fighting' you mentioned. If it got your attention, it must be unbelievable."

I stopped for a moment, remembering her dance of death in the cantina. "Yeah. It was."

Then I snapped my mouth shut and started walking again.

"Too bad she's a Jedi." Bao Dur commented.

"She's not a jetti," I growled without thinking.

And that stopped me again. The first thing she had said when I accused her of it was "Nope". And she had meant it.

"Exactly." Bao Dur would have sounded smug, if he wasn't talking to me. I don't like smug from other people.

"You got a point?" I snapped.

"Hey, that was almost civil." He smiled as I snarled again. "It's just that I wondered…what did she lie about?"

"Being a…." I stopped. "Oh." Well, point one for her; I _was_ an idiot. If I was going to be totally honest, which I wasn't in the mood for, she hadn't at any time claimed to be jetti. I tried to regroup my forces. "But that fighting…she couldn't be that good without the Force."

"Possibly not. But…she has these abilities, and uses them to hone her skill, not create it. She _can_ fight, and learned to, just as you did, with practice and training and sweat and skill. The Force just enhances her ability to use it, that's all. She's not a fully trained Jedi, and by her own words, doesn't want to be. Do _you_ stop learning new ways to fight, just because you're better than most opponents as you are?"

I _hate _being wrong, or worse, having to listen to someone tell me I am. But I _am_ honest, and what he said was reasonable. I didn't want to say so, though. I was steeling myself to do the honorable thing and admit it, when Bao Dur, who usually says maybe a dozen words a day, rattled on. Well, hell, it saved me from having to say out loud I was wrong; might as well listen.

"Let me ask you something. Why do you hate Jedi?"

That took me by surprise. I had expected a speech. "I don't hate jetti."

"Good to know," he made a gesture at his own light saber. "All right, maybe the better question is: what do you have against Jedi?"

"How long do you want to stand there and be insulted?"

"Try me."

"They're arrogant, think they know everything, and act like they're better than everyone else." There, let him argue that.

He did. "Hm. Doesn't sound like anyone else I know."

Yeah, sonny-boy, go ahead, just say it. I would rather let a kath hound chew my arm off than admit I knew who he was talking about it.

But he didn't press the point, simply continued, "Well, I can't argue that some of them were. But can you honestly say that about the ones you _do_ know well?"

"Kreia," I said flatly. "And another one I knew a while back, Bastila."

"Kreia is in another realm altogether, and we know for a fact she's a Sith. None of us liked her, not even the General. I've heard of Bastila; by all accounts you're probably right. We met some of the Masters before Kreia killed them. At least one of them would fit your description. The other three, not so much. Arrogance _is_ a failing of a lot of higher-up Jedi. But…there aren't any more higher-ups anymore."

I mulled that over for a while. Yep, he had just agreed with me. I felt better, good enough to actually talk some more.

"I respect them as fighters; I can't argue the results, and I've seen many of them beat odds that would have brought my own men down. But they fight well because of the Force, not because they worked at it."

"Fair enough, from your point of view. Let's use me as an example, though. I just became a Jedi. I fight better now, that's true. But I work hard to improve, just like you do. Jedi skills aren't just 'open up to the Force and get all these powers', it's a lot of training to learn to use them, and use them in a way that doesn't hurt anyone, or yourself, without meaning to. It's exhausting, believe me. And a lot of responsibility. You agree to be a Jedi, and you agree to have a lot of people _believe_ you know what's right, even when you don't. It's being a leader on a scale that's staggering. You _are_ the leader of your people, you understand how it is."

Hell yes, I did. Amazing how many people think you know everything just because you're strong enough to get people to follow.

But then I realized that Bao Dur had done exactly as he had meant to; I wasn't angry anymore. I even was starting to feel a bit of a jerk of how I'd behaved. Only a little bit, mind.

But I did want to make one more small point before going back to the Ebon Hawk.

"You want to know, really, what I have against jetti?"

Bao Dur nodded, still smiling.

"They beat us."


	5. Chapter 5

**Jennet**

I woke up, stretching out in the bunk and yawning hugely. How in the hell do regular-sized people sleep in these things, I wondered. It isn't often that I bless being small, but shipboard I am always grateful that I can sleep, uncramped. I smelled food, and my stomach growled. I glanced at the glowing clock on the wall. Wow, I'd been asleep for at least ten hours. I must have been more tired than I thought after that hit on the head yesterday. I checked it by reflex. No bump, only the tiniest of tenderness that indicated a recently healed wound. No headache, eyes clear. Good.

I scrounged around for my clothes and realized I was still wearing them. Have I mentioned I'm not too swift in the mornings? Well, I guessed breakfast could wait – I'd take a quick shower, and throw my clothes in the laundry recycle while I'm in there. It only takes a few minutes, anyway. I was about to hunt for a towel when I saw a package by my bed with my name on it. I remembered asking Ladria to get me some more clothes; apparently she had done so. I silently blessed her for not letting me make do with only one set.

The package was a goldmine to someone that had absolutely nothing, namely, me. It had two sets of shirts, pants, underthings, and jackets. There was even a robe, towels, toothpaste, toothbrush, hairbrush, and comb. I noticed that the underwear was a little more – fancy – than I usually wore. Either Ladria had taken up Atton's offer, or Mira had thought it would be funny. Actually, I liked them, so I didn't take offense either way. There were two workout bras and shorts, too. Gods, I love these people.

Deciding I needed a shower before food anyway, I quickly stripped down, bundled into the robe, and grabbed my new toiletries. I snagged my dirty things to toss in the laundry, and headed to the 'fresher. Once bathed, dressed, and mouth freshened, I followed some wonderful smells to the galley. Disciple was seated at the big table, sipping coffee with an empty plate in front of him. He appeared to be pouring over a datapad, and his expression was rapt. Mira was in much the same state, but was cleaning her rocket launcher. Well, whatever gets you off. There was no one else around.

"Good morning," I said to my new shipmates, and went into the galley for food and coffee. I got a grunt from Mira and a distracted "Morning" from Disciple. I didn't mind. I wasn't an especially cheerful person in the mornings, but I am acceptable after coffee, and it's never good manners to growl at anyone right off, especially when they had done your shopping. There was tons of food, and I was so hungry I was tempted to just eat from the serving dishes. Trying to be polite though, I poked my head out and asked, "Anyone else left to feed?"

"Mandalore," Mira answered.

Ah, shit. Oh well, maybe he doesn't eat breakfast. I looked at the amount of food left, and tried to divide things by what I imagined his appetite vs. mine would be. I decided there probably wasn't enough food after all. His loss, if he didn't get to the galley in time, I thought spitefully. Teach him for getting me in to this in the first place. I filled my plate as high as I could without spilling, poured a cup of coffee, doctored it, and shuffled out to the table. To my consternation, Disciple stood as I approached. Mira scooted over to give me room to sit. He looked at me, smiled, and said "Good morning, Jennet," in his perfectly civilized voice. He waited until I was seated until he sat again, then dove face first back into his datapad. I looked at Mira. She just shrugged back, and mouthed "Tell you later." Oooookay.

"Hey, thanks for shopping for me yesterday," I said sincerely. Mira just shrugged again and continued cleaning her weapon. A thought struck her and she looked up and grinned. "Like the undies?"

I shot a look at Disciple. I'm not a prude by any stretch, and if it had been any other male sitting there, I wouldn't have given it a thought. But Disciple was so proper – it was almost catching. I found myself wanting to stick my pinky out when I held my coffee mug. He looked oblivious, though, and on further reflection I decided if Mira thought it was okay to talk about my underwear in front of him, I wasn't going quibble. I grinned at her.

"Yeah, they're nice. I thought it was you that picked them out."

"Yeah, well, Ladria was going for something I'd figure your grandma would wear, and Atton tried to pick out stuff that even I wouldn't touch on a bet." She waved at her own rather skimpy outfit. "He said he wanted to see your face when you put them on. I just toned things down a bit."

Mira was a lot more thoughtful than she let on. I was pleased to know it.

"And how did he expect to be in a position to see me put them on?" I asked curiously. I wasn't worried; any fool could see he was completely gone on Ladria. But I could tell the minute I saw him he was a man that just liked women in general, and admired them in all their shapes, sizes and temperaments. Bao Dur was one of those too. I'm not sure Disciple would see a woman dancing naked in front of him if he was in the middle of research, but I didn't get the totally uninterested vibe, either. Since I'm pretty much the same about men, I understood the attitude. I'm not promiscuous, per se; I just like that men are men, in all their weirdness.

"He claimed he would know when he saw you."

I just bet he would, too.

Mira eyed my plate. "You gonna eat all that?"

"Um…yeah…" I dove in, a little embarrassed. It was hard to explain to others my appetite. The amount of energy I burn because of my healing causes me to need to refuel regularly. I _can_ go a long time with very little, but as Dad used to say, it ain't comfortable. I tend to eat big when it's available, so I can store up for when it's not. Mira muttered something about telling Bao Dur we'd need more food supplies and let it go. It occurred to me while I steadily worked my way through my plate that maybe it _wasn't_ difficult, here. I was in the middle of a bunch of Jedi, and for the first time I didn't have to hide what I was. I found it…comforting. So I did explain.

Mira listened. Her expression didn't change much, for all I knew I was boring her to death. But she made "that's interesting" noises, and eventually I shut up. I'm just a chattering fool around here, I thought despairingly. Unexpectedly, Disciple spoke up, and asked how I felt if I went oh, say, ten hours without food.

"Well, if I've been eating well before that, I'm just hungry. But that can be blocked, and I can function just fine. If it's been a long time on short rations, I find my healing slows down. If I don't eat for a few days, my healing can't be used outside myself, and even then it's slowed down to less than a standard regeneration implant."

"Fascinating," Disciple said, and he really seemed sincere. I smiled around bacon and eggs.

I realized after that my plate was empty, so I got up for more. Disciple popped up like a jack-in-the-box and I smiled at him again. He sat down when I turned around. With food and a cup of coffee in me, my whimsy had returned. I considered turning back to the table, just to see if Disciple jumped up again, then leaving, then coming back. I restrained myself, and just went back in to the galley. I got considerably less food this time, leaving a respectable amount for Canderous, if he showed up. On the heels of that thought, he did. The doorway of the galley was suddenly blocked by a big, scruffy shadow. I looked up and saw Canderous's blue eyes fixed on me. He was not smiling. Since that was his usual expression, I didn't let it bother me. I smiled and said cheerily, "Good morning," because I knew it would irritate him.

It did. He growled something that could have been "Good morning" or "Hello" or "Fuck off", I couldn't tell. I decided not to push things by asking him to repeat it. Being not a morning person myself, I know the signs. I finished doctoring my coffee and made to leave the galley. He didn't move. I looked up, craning my neck to see his face.

"Excuse me," I said politely. Okay, maybe I snapped a little. By his standards, it _was_ polite. But he was doing an intimidation thing with me, and I really hate to be intimidated. Well, in this case, I hate someone that can't, trying. It might sound strange, but he really _couldn't_ intimidate me. I'd spent the better part of a day in his lap; nothing would faze me about him now. I didn't think so, anyway. Oh, the hubris of youth.

Remember this: half the time in anyone's life, they don't know what the fuck they're talking about. This is especially true of me.

Canderous looked down at me, his blue eyes alight with something I couldn't identify. I wanted like hell to back up a pace, but didn't want to appear to be, well, intimidated. So I met him stare for stare.

"Something on your mind?" I asked sweetly.

"You owe me a fight," he said, quietly. Well, for him it was quiet. It wasn't a growl, more a rumble.

"Absolutely," I agreed. "When?"

"How about a half hour after breakfast?"

"Let me check my schedule. Hm, seems to be clear. Okay, then."

"I want to make this more interesting."

"How so?" I asked suspiciously.

"I'd like to fight twice. First, without any advantage on your part. No Force powers, just fists and feet."

I considered that. "Define Force powers."

He looked a bit surprised at the request. "Well, in the Mandolorian battle circle, we consider it fair with no healing, no force pushes, paralyzing, things like that. And no light saber; no weapons at all."

"Okay, I agree. I wasn't considering sparring with you as a weapons sort of thing anyway, and I don't use a 'saber. But the healing…I will promise to not use the heal burst that most Jedi use, but mine's different. I can't really turn it off. I can intensify it to heal big things, or heal faster, but it sort of automatically dispenses as I need it, like a regeneration implant, but quicker."

He thought about this. "I have a regeneration implant that I've never bothered to use. It's stronger than the basic ones, but it doesn't require surgery to insert. I can use that, and would consider it fair."

"Fine by me. And the second fight?"

"All out. No weapons, but no other rules, either."

I grinned. "You're on." See, this is where I got overconfident. By his rules, I didn't have to change anything. I would be basically able to fight as I always did, except I could ramp up the healing process if I needed to in the second match.

"And…if I win, you owe me a forfeit. If you win, I owe. Your choice."

"What if we each win one?"

He grinned wickedly. "Then I guess we trade forfeits."

"Sounds fair," I shrugged.

Remember the intimidation thing? Well, it bit me on the ass. His next words sent a shiver down my spine. He leaned way over, so his mouth was right by my ear.

"I'm _very_ much looking forward to it," and his voice was a deep, husky, satisfied purr.

Oh, shit.

He stepped aside then, and I fled back to the table. Suddenly, I wasn't very hungry anymore. I ate anyway.


	6. Chapter 6

The bastard took his time eating breakfast. I finished not long after he got to the table. By this time, Mira and Disciple had disappeared to parts unknown. I had made the mistake of mentioning the match to her. I was certain she was now gleefully gathering up the Ebon Hawk crew to witness my slaughter.

Canderous ate as steadily as I did, and didn't chat. Big surprise. I left him there, his smug expression getting on my nerves. I headed back to the dorm and found an empty footlocker under my bed. I pulled out a training outfit, and stowed the remainder of my pitifully few possessions in the locker, shoving it back under the bunk. I changed, and attended to my hair.

I kept it pretty short, just about chin length, but it was long enough that I wanted it out of the way. I've considered from time to time just cutting it military-short, but it was curly and I ended up looking I had Bantha beard stuck to my head. Privately, I admitted it was one of my small vanities; I did like to look like a girl now and then. I would love to grow it long, but it's too much a hassle to take care of and too easy a handhold for an enemy. Looking in the mirror on the wall of the dorm, I decided at least it was a nice color. Not as gorgeous as Ladria's dark red, or Mira's flaming copper, but a nice, caramel blonde that didn't clash with much. Realizing I was trying to distract myself again, I scraped it back into a ponytail and secured it firmly. Then I used the 'fresher (nothing worse than fighting on a full bladder), and headed outside to start stretching.

Outside, a few of the crew were starting to gather. I was right, Mira had been busy. Atton was front and center, Ladria sitting next to him and Mira on the other side of her. They'd even brought chairs. Atton looked up as I exited the ship, gave a little wave, and grinned impudently at me. I responded with a rude hand gesture and he laughed. Mira gave me a wink, and Ladria called, "Go get him, girl!' a wide, genuine grin on her face. She's so perfect, it's startling when she acts like a real person. Which, come to think of it, really is most of the time. I couldn't help but like our illustrious leader, love her a little, even. I couldn't believe that I'd known these people less than 24 hours and they already felt like family. I guess it really isn't, in a way. A nice side effect of being Force sensitive is that you can learn a lot about the character of a person in a very short time. The best part of not having to hide it myself was that I knew others were doing the same with me, and seemed to like me anyway.

_I wonder if they feel that way about me, being family, _I thought, a little wistfully.

As I stretched out, thought about this odd mixture of personalities I found myself with. Atton acted like a clown and liked everyone to believe he was, but I'd seen those black streaks, heard his story, and knew there was a lot more intelligence and introspection there than he was comfortable showing. Despite his antics and ogling, he made me feel safe, like a big brother. Mira was the same, although she shielded herself with the "kick-ass bitch" sign plastered to her forehead. Bao Dur was every girl's big brother, every guy's best man, and a hell of a lot more passionate than most people noticed. I saw it there, when he looked at his General. That he was in love with Ladria was painfully obvious, to anyone that cared to see. That she did see, and not allow him to feel awkward or less a man because it wasn't returned was remarkable. I wished I could be like that, and knew I didn't have the tact or class to pull it off.

Visas and Disciple were both puzzling. I hadn't quite figured out their niche yet. Disciple, I decided, was put in this universe to remind people to wash their hands before eating, and be nice to Gizka pups. When you're around him, you just want to be on good behavior, because he so naturally did himself. Visas…there's a woman who feels her penance would never be over, and was serene about it. Strange combination, but it worked for her. I did admire it. I liked them both well enough, but I couldn't help but think that of them all, those two needed the most to wake up in a strange place, naked, with an agonizing headache and blackmail material in their friend's datapads. Trying to be perfect is exhausting, and those that do tend to snap eventually. I made a mental note about looking for this sort of opportunity, if we lived through this mission. Atton and Mira would probably help me. I grinned wickedly at the thought.

Ladria. She was an incredible woman, and had done so much in such a short time. I was pretty sure she was only a few years older than my own twenty-five. But she was so poised and lovely and smart and capable that she was a mother to everyone.

Canderous, though…to me, he was the easiest to figure out, but the most puzzling of all. I liked that he was straightforward, and you always knew exactly where you stood with him. He either respected you, or didn't. If he didn't, and couldn't kill you, you were off the grid, not worth his time. He said what he thought, usually only when asked, did what he thought needed done, and there was no fuss about it. He was intelligent, but not particularly intellectual, and had loads of common sense. He dressed comfortably, ate when hungry, talked when he had to, and didn't care what anyone thought of him. He admired courage and honor, and liked it when you weren't afraid to stand up to him; he had no use for cowards. You could say anything to him and not worry about hurt feelings, because he was so secure in himself that a different opinion doesn't faze him. He might get mad, but he'll always be honest in return.

I figured most people would say he's got anger issues. I didn't think so. Sure, he has a temper, and I'd bet my last credit that he could hold a grudge like no one's business, if he felt it was warranted. But I could sense that it wasn't anger or hate that drove him. It was exactly as he says: honor, courage, and battle. When battle isn't available, he prepares for it. Simple. He makes no bones about it, and saw no reason to be anything other than what he is. In a lot of ways, I was most comfortable with him, because he was the other misfit. The only other non Jedi of the group, the only one not Force sensitive at all. He was completely alone, and didn't have an ounce of self-pity over it.

The fact that he was good looking in a craggy sort of way hadn't gone unnoticed, either. Or the fact I was spending so much time thinking about him. I decided it was time to stop, and just go kick his ass.

For all the thoughts that had been churning around in my dizzy little brain, not a whole lot of time had passed. I had a sudden worried notion, and dashed back in to the ship. Coming back with a small pouch, I snagged Bao Dur, who had just arrived for the festivities.

"Does the merchant by the docks sell kolto packs?" I asked anxiously.

"Yes, I think so," he replied, puzzled.

"Here, take this and buy as many as he's got, the strongest you can get." I handed him the pouch, and he took it automatically.

"Expecting trouble?" Bao Dur raised an eyebrow.

"I just feel better if there's plenty around. Call it a security blanket. My contribution to the infirmary, whatever. But hurry, or you'll miss the show," I winked, and he trotted off on his errand.

Bao Dur returned with a small bag just as Canderous was finishing up his own stretches. I waved, and he gave me a thumb's up. I felt happier knowing there was plenty of kolto on hand. Then he made a 'follow me' gesture. Canderous looked like he expected it, and I hurried after them, wondering what was up. Bao Dur led us to the center of the open area of the docking bay and had us face off.

He turned to me, face serious but eyes twinkling, and asked solemnly, "Jennet, do you vow that you will fight under the rules agreed: no combative or defensive Force powers, and no weapons other than yourself?"

"I do so vow," I answered, just as solemnly. I drew myself up, and glared over at Canderous. He stared back implacably. He had asked Bao Dur to officiate, making this match a lot more significant than simple sparring. It told me two things: One, Canderous was taking this very seriously, and he wanted to make sure I was too. Two, he didn't entirely trust that I'd keep my word on the terms of the fight. The first, I didn't blame him; Mandalorians take challenges very seriously, even minor ones. Most other races don't, at least not to their standards. The second, I was going to kick his ass twice for.

"Mandalore, do you vow you will fight under the rules agreed as well?"

"I do so vow," he said seriously.

And so the fight began. I tried something new; I just stood there. No defensive posture, no circling, no advance or retreat. I stood, and made him come to me.

I don't know if I can explain how my fighting works; I'm pretty sure you have experience it to really understand. My dad's gift in fighting was a knack of being able to slow down what you see, yet still live and react in real time. He noticed early that I had reflexes similar to his, and worked with me to develop this technique. It wasn't the Force; it was a state of mind. It was as if things were in slow motion, and it gave me time to get out of the way and/or make a strike where my opponent had left themselves open. It's the best way to put it, I guess; I've never tried to use words to describe the experience. It's gotten me through more fights than I can count. It's not like using the Force to sense your opponent's intentions, but it looks the same. I usually use a combination of both Force sense and my sight in battle; it never does to be completely dependent on only one thing to keep you alive. Flexibility is a fighter's friend, in more ways than one.

I also used this because I wanted to be absolutely within the letter of the law on our agreement. I wasn't using the Force at all; just me. I knew that normal Force sense was allowed; I'd fought in a Mandalorian battle circle before. But my pride was pricked; he'd pissed me off by not trusting me to keep my word.

I waited, arms loose at my sides, ready. He moved carefully, looking for the catch. Finally, he took a test swing, and I got my face out of the way. I didn't move my feet, just shifted my torso back and the fist whizzed by. He followed up with the other, aimed where my head now was, and I shifted back. I let him drop back into position, and waited again. His face was calm. Damn.

With a grunt, he came at me again, and this time, I engaged. He tried to sweep my legs, and I leaped over like a jump rope. While he was still in that awkward pose, I kicked back, catching him on the side. He grabbed my foot, quicker than I thought he could, but couldn't hold it. I pulled free and turned around as he sprang to his feet. He came at me again, fast, and I blocked a punch to my ribs with one hand, sweeping it aside while punching him in the gut with the other. Very little effect, but it got his attention. His other hand got me in the side with a decent blow, but I'd seen it just in time to avoid getting my ribs broken. I ducked under his arms, set my hands firmly on the ground, and kicked my legs up, one after the other, catching him under the jaw as I flipped. His head snapped back, but I was too busy getting upright to make use of the opening. I saw too late that I should have kept tumbling

He had gotten closer than I expected when I was up, but my sight was still working, and I saw his foot as it whipped around and caught me in the side. He'd swung around in a spinning back kick while I had been doing my pretty little maneuver. It would have been my gut, but I dodged just enough to take it on my hip. That hurt like a bitch, but at least I was still breathing. I felt my hip give way though, and went down. I threw my body into the fall, rolling sideways and getting my hands on either side of my head when I was on my back. He was advancing, and I heaved with my arms and feet, kicking up when I was arched enough to flip over. By luck, one of my feet clipped his chin. He grunted, but kept coming. I danced closer, and spun, trying for a spinning kick. He stepped in to the move, and stopped me cold while my back was to him. I smiled. Quick as thought, I changed the kick straight upwards, and got him full in the face. I heard his nose crunch. Ew. I hate that sound.

My foot swinging back down, I used its momentum to slip it between his legs, and got a feeble blow to the ass. Oh well, no one could say I hadn't, now. While it was down there, I kicked his right knee hard, throwing him off balance. At that, he loosed his grip on my arms, and I elbowed him in the gut, putting all my force behind it, whirled around, and landed a good one square under the jaw. He went down on one knee, and I used mine to hit him there again. I followed it with a kick to the head, and that was that.

I stood still, made sure it was over, then signaled to Bao Dur. He tossed me the bag of kolto packs, and I broke one open, applying gently it to the side of Canderous's head. He was conscious, but stunned and groaning a little. He must have steel plating for a skull if that kick didn't knock him out. Bao Dur had approached and took over, tossing a couple of kolto packs to me as well. I could use my healing now, but I wanted to keep my energy high. I used one on my hip, slipping it into the side of my shorts and holding it there until I felt the effects. Once the pack was useless, I tossed it at Bao Dur, who put it in the bag. I ached a bit, but otherwise was fine. Suddenly I felt a wave of Force energy wash over me, and looked up to see Ladria standing next to me, smiling. I felt wonderful.

"Better?" She asked.

"Yeah, thanks. I'm good." I looked at Canderous; he was coming around. Ladria healed him too, and he gruffly thanked her.

I went over, and held out my hand. "Good fight," I said, and he actually smiled. I thought for sure he'd be mad, or at least irritated. He reached up, and clasped my hand, grabbing my wrist while I grabbed his. He shook it firmly, and I helped haul him up.

"Great fight," he answered.

He was _grinning_. He had drying blood all over the front of his shirt. His nose was healed, but had a new, interesting bump adding to its collection, and I had given him a concussion. I don't think I'd seen him happier. Men.

I hadn't heard the others cheering until now. Atton was whooping on the sidelines, Mira right along with him. Ladria grinned at both of us, and even Disciple and Visas were clapping. I gave a theatrical bow, and they applauded in appreciation. I turned back to Canderous, and to my amazement, he was clapping too.

"Why are you being so nice about this?" I asked.

"There's no shame in being defeated by a worthy opponent. You deserve to be praised," he said simply. "Look, kid, you're good, I don't mind saying it. I've heard that the Force gives you clarity in battle. I've seen it before, but you were extraordinary."

"That wasn't the Force," I said.

He stopped clapping. "No?"

"No."

He thought about that for a moment. "Is it something you could teach me?"

I didn't know what to say at first; I've never been asked. "I don't know," I said finally. "You have great reflexes, you might be able to learn. But you'd have to be open-minded, and trust me. It will seem a lot, to you, like learning to be a Jedi, I think."

"I can do that."

"Be open minded, or trust me?"

"Yes."

"It's a deal, then." I stuck my hand out, and he clasped it, warm and hard. "I can't promise results, but I'll try."

"It's all I ask." He grinned again, and said, "So what is your forfeit?"

I checked quickly to make sure no one could hear us. I looked at him and said "I want you to tell me why you haven't told anyone your given name."

He looked taken aback at that, but nodded. "Done. But later, when I we have time, and privacy. Ready for round two?"

I was so happy that for the moment I had forgotten that we still had another match to go.

"Sure," I said.

"Good." He went over to a small pack I hadn't noticed before and got something out of it. He turned to me with an almost evil smile, and injected something into his thigh.

I was in such deep shit.

I don't use stims, myself. Something about my healing ability makes them either go wonky, and I have no control, or pass out, or they simply don't work. But Mandolorians practically invented stims. They don't use them to excess, or depend on them like many half-assed fighters do to try and get an edge. A good Mandolorian is trained in the selective use of them from almost birth. They make a high quality, powerful product that make the usual stuff feel like a mild buzz from a shot of Juma Juice, or so I'm told. All it does to me is make me go insane, and usually someone gets dead, and I won't remember a thing once the crash hits. A Mandolorian hyper-battle stim in the veins of a high caliber warrior used to is effects is deadly.

_Well, at least the rules say he can't kill me, _I thought grimly.


	7. Chapter 7

Author's note: Thanks for the feeback so far! I'm glad someone's enjoying the story.

Aeryn - I appreciate your feelings on the swearing - all I can say is that's how Jennet and Canderous told me to write their story. Especially Jennet; she's a chatterbox, and stubborn. Ironically, the swearing does slow way down as the story progresses, and I wrote it that way before your comment. I have a theory why, (believe me, it wasn't a conscious thing) but won't go into it here because of spoilers. Funny thing was, I had written the first chapter in third person narrative, which worked okay. Then I tried writing Jennet the same way, just shifting focus from Canderous to her. And it didn't work; I couldn't get Jennet to talk. Finally, she just said hey, let _me_ tell my story, and everything fell into place. Canderous didn't seem to care one way or the other, but I rewrote the first chapter in first person narrative with his voice, anyway, and pretty soon he seemed to get on board and enjoy talking too.

Ah, the schizophrenic joys of writing. grin 

I appreciate feedback from any reader; please R&R if so inclined. Thanks! - LJ

* * *

Bao Dur did the little ceremony thing again, and I used the time to study Canderous. He wasn't crazed, or glassy-eyed, or even twitching. He was calm, and had a light of determination in his blue stare. I was _so _dead.

I was up to my ass in trouble as soon as the match began. I was using the Force to anticipate, but basically, I was on the defense from the beginning. I can't really describe the fight; it went too fast. I hadn't used my sight yet. I started simply dancing around him, keeping him after me, looking for openings, getting a blow in here and there that did nothing except put me in reach of his whirling fists and feet. I shifted to my sight, and discovered it was next to useless. He was quick normally; on stims, he was unbelievable. So I did something stupid. I closed my eyes.

_Your eyes can fool you; don't trust them,_ the mantra went through my mind, just as my dad and mom had taught me. It was one of the first things a Jedi learned, they had said.

I used it now, and utter clarity washed over me. I found myself blocking and spinning, punching and kicking and feeling Canderous bleeding near me. I ramped into high gear, and suddenly felt an exaltation take me; a joy that I wasn't sure was entirely from me. I hurt just about everywhere now, but I didn't care; I barely felt it. I blocked the pain completely, squeezed my eyes tighter shut, and felt my body leave the ground as I willed the Force to assist me in a jump. The joy was still with me, seeming to intensify my Force abilities. I could feel Canderous's life force around me; it was weakening. Mine was too; I ignored that, didn't care about anything but the screaming pleasure of battle. Dimly, I tried to remind myself that this wasn't a death match. The fire in me roared for blood.

The jump threw me over his head, and I struck down with my fist as I passed by. That had to have hurt, badly, but it didn't stop him. And all of a sudden, I realized I couldn't sense anything anymore. The feeling of sheer ecstasy drowned everything else, and I didn't sense him spin around to face me as I landed. I opened my eyes, confused, in time to see one hand shoot toward my head. I danced sideways to avoid it. The rest of my senses gone, the battle joy was _using _me now. My foot snapped up, going for the throat; I was going to crush the life out of this enemy. I saw the shock on his face but his reflexes kicked in and he blocked me, viciously slamming aside my leg. Off balance, crazy with this singing death in my head, I somehow used that momentum to spin in a wild leap and come up with one hand aiming at his face, intent on breaking his nose upward. That it would likely kill him, I didn't care; the song demanded it.

He blocked me again, and a series of blows whirled around me. Then something in me snapped back into place, and the feeling of exhilaration left so completely I was momentarily still. I saw Canderous's fist come at me, heard a sickening crunch, and pain engulfed me before everything went black.

I came to I don't know how many hours later, with Canderous's face set in a – was that worried? - scowl above me. I smiled weakly.

"Your forfeit," I said, trying to draw a breath that didn't hurt. "How long was I out?"

"Woman, don't do that ever again!" He didn't roar, but he was loud all the same, and I winced.

"Can't promise anything," I muttered, and closed my eyes again.

I heard Bao Dur say somewhere in outer space, "You've only been out a few moments. Let me help you," and Force energy flooded through my body. I felt it mend broken things inside me, and my head immediately felt better. I added my own Force push, and I was almost normal. I opened my eyes again, and saw felt Bao Dur start to use Force heal on me again.

"No, don't…help Can…Mandalore," I waved him off.

"I'm fine," I heard Canderous snap.

"No, you're not," I snapped back, and sat up.

The rest of our little party was gathered around now, looking concerned and babbling questions. I felt a general use of Force power on both of us from several directions. Any more, and I was going to start dancing.

I stood up, gathered the excess energy that was making me light-headed, and siphoned it into the ground through my feet. I felt my head stop swimming, and opened my eyes. Canderous was fully healed now, but the stim was still in his system.

"You okay?" I asked rhetorically.

"Me?! I almost kill you, and you want to know how _I_ am?" He savagely scowled again.

"Yes," I said brightly. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to bait him when he was still on stims, but I couldn't help myself. "After all, I almost killed you, too."

"You did not – well, yeah, you did, but I did it better."

This was so nonsensical I laughed. "Come here," I said.

"Why?"

"Because I want to help you get that stim out of you. You want to calm down, I can tell, but it won't let you."

"You can do that?"

"Yeah. Do you trust me?"

"I said I did, didn't I?" He came over.

I put my hands over his heart. I can do this without touching, but it's a lot harder. I told him to breathe deep, and focused on his heartbeat. I closed my eyes, imagining the tracks of his veins running through his body. I felt the alien energy of the stim circulating around and drew it down, sending it out of his feet to dissipate into the ground. I opened my eyes to his intent blue gaze. I swallowed, and took my hands away, backing up a pace.

"Better?"

"Yes." He continued to look at me, and suddenly I was aware of our interested audience. Canderous didn't seem to care.

"I need to beg your pardon," he suddenly said, very formally.

"Huh?" I said. Snappy comeback queen, that's me.

"I took stim, and nearly killed you. It was not my intention, but I let my pride get in the way of good sense. It was not worthy of me."

He wasn't begging, or prostrating himself, and his tone wasn't particularly contrite. But in every line, his regret was evident, and he was apologizing to me in front of everyone. I felt very small. I wasn't worth his pride.

"You didn't do anything wrong. I don't know exactly what happened, but it was me as much as you. I felt – something. It took me, and I almost killed you, and then it blinded me. It wasn't even rage, it was – joy." Remembering, I was suddenly frightened. I had never felt that before when fighting. Usually, I'm pretty calm, or sometimes, really pissed, and sure, everyone who fights gets a rush. But never _happy._

Something flickered in his eyes. I saw it, just before he suppressed it. He had an idea what had happened, and didn't want to say it, at least not now, with the fascinated witnesses gathered around.

"Perhaps you're right. But I am sorry all the same."

"Forgiven. If you forgive me."

"Done." And then he kissed me.

I was shocked to my toes. He was awfully good at it, and I wondered who in the universe had taught him. I wanted to send the biggest bouquet of flowers I could find to her. Candy, too.

His mouth was warm, and hard, and his lips were soft. He kissed me like a warrior who wants to use his woman hard while he's still high after a battle. I guess he was, come to that. I melted, and kissed back just as fiercely.

It was only a moment, and much too soon he set me down. "That was my forfeit," he said in a low growl that carried around our little circle. Then he strode away, grabbing his stim pack and going back to the Ebon Hawk. I stared after him, speechless for once.

"Well," Atton said gleefully. "That was unexpected."

"Shut up, Atton," Mira, Ladria, Visas, and I said, in four part harmony.

"I better go talk to him," I said, uncertainly.

"Good idea. Can we watch? Sell tickets? Enter you two in the fight ring?" Atton asked hopefully.

"Fuck you, Rand," I said, with my best death-head smile.

"You keep offering," he said with a mock sigh. "Tease."

"We'll be busy…elsewhere," Ladria said firmly, and looping her harm through Atton's, towed him away. Bao Dur followed, winking at me, and Mira grinned as she turned to head after them. Visas and Disciple tagged behind. I watched them go, then went in to the ship.


	8. Chapter 8

**Canderous**

_She's a witch, that's what it is,_ I told myself as I strode into the Ebon Hawk.

To kiss her had been my intention of forfeit all along. I'd wanted to ever since I had seen her in the cantina, graceful and beautiful and deadly. She was fiery, and courageous, and strong, and stubborn, and glorious to watch in battle. I would not be Mandalorian not to want her. I had intended to taste her, to take my prize, and know I'd earned it.

That had been the only thing that had really gone as I had planned. She tasted as wild and tangy as I had imagined, like a rare spice that heals, but can kill if you take too much. I hadn't expected her to kiss me back, but was pleased she had.

What shocked me was her being in tune with my battle ecstasy. I was sure that was what she had felt. And because of it, I had almost killed her. That she had been bent on crushing the life out of me was irrelevant. What the _fuck_ was going on? The only explanation I could think of was impossible.

On board, I tossed my stim pack in a corner and hauled out my armor. I took it to the workbench, and began going over it, repairing and polishing. I'd come across some new upgrades that I wanted to install, and I always think better when I'm busy with my hands.

If had used the stim for a couple reasons. Mostly, I wanted to win. I had made up my mind what my forfeit would be, and I wanted my prize. I'm not practiced and easy with women like Atton, or gentle like Bao Dur, or as clueless as Disciple. But I'm not unskilled, and I'm wise enough to seek women that appreciate what I do have to offer. The blonde terror I'd brought into our midst hadn't, at first, seemed like she would, for all her flirting. I figured the only way I'd get near her was to claim forfeit – if I was good enough to earn it. I'd seen her fight, and with her Force ability, I thought the stim would better the odds.

Not, I told myself, that I thought I couldn't win without it. But…she had thrown our first fight, and that was humiliating. I understood why, but the shame boiled in my blood. She had gotten under my skin, and I had wanted to teach her a lesson. What I had said was true: I had let my pride get in the way of my common sense.

She wasn't a bit afraid of me, even seemed to like my more unsociable qualities. She made me laugh. She made me crazy. Her kiss had burned. I wanted to throw myself into her fire, and be consumed.

That wasn't like me, and it was - disturbing. Sex is great; it satisfies things battle can't. It's a pleasure I don't trouble to deny myself, but I keep it where it belongs – as an occasional indulgence between me and a sturdy woman that doesn't mind things a little rough, who is usually well paid for her enthusiasm. I like it that way – a business transaction. When I move on I don't have anything to leave behind. I had had a wife once, and children. After Malchor V, I had no use for any sort of permanent relationship.

And why was I even thinking permanent? I had known her only a day. She wouldn't want my life, I don't want hers. I was the Mandalore; to bring home an outlander as my mate would bring untold trouble. I could lose everything I was trying to build. Unless the crazy idea that I was now considering was true. Even if it wasn't….I wasn't sure I cared.

And that was why, for the first time in my life, I was really afraid.

_That_ made me mad. At her, because I wasn't in the mood to blame myself. I'm honest; I'm not always reasonable.

Of course, that's when she chose to walk in. I looked up, nodded, and turned my attention to my armor.

"Hey there," she said in her most cheerful, irritating voice. I grunted. She can talk enough for the both of us; I figured I'd let her. Saves time.

"That's beautiful armor," she said, and it sounded sincere. I looked up, and her gaze was on the workbench, rapt and admiring. Unwillingly, I felt most of my anger drain away. I have a soft spot for anyone who honestly appreciates well-made armor or weapons.

"I could build you some," I found myself offering.

"That would be wonderful," she said, her face alight. "Could you manage anything less bulky? I can't move well in this kind. I had a nice flexible fibersteel shirt, but it got blown up with the rest of my stuff."

"I could," and that was the last of witty conversation I had.

She came closer, and stood next to the workbench, inches from me. I could smell her; musk and spice and good clean sweat. I felt a trickle down my back and tried to ignore her.

"You're blocking my light," I said gruffly, and she stepped back.

"Sorry."

I made a noncommittal sound, and continued working. I was done with this piece, and put it aside. I grabbed a cuirass, and examined the knee joint. It gaped a little where it joined the lower leg. I set about correcting it.

"Interesting forfeit. Do you want to tell me why?" Her voice was casual.

"No."

She was silent so long I finally looked up just to make sure she hadn't left. Her face was thoughtful, and she looked at me straight on, brown eyes shrewd. I gazed back, keeping my face unreadable.

"All right," she said, cheerful. "_Will_ you tell me?"

"I wanted to." I answered simply.

She looked at me. Then she grinned. "That's a great non-answer."

"Thanks," I said, pleased.

"Of course you wanted to, for some reason, or you wouldn't have chosen kissing me as forfeit. What I want to know is _why_."

"Persistent little bitch, aren't you?" I asked, recalling our conversation in the alley.

"Yep." She answered, just as I had. She grinned.

"I wanted you." I said baldly, and snapped my mouth shut, turning back to the workbench.

She was quiet for a moment then asked, "And you thought that was the only way I'd let you kiss me?"

"Yes."

"Well, it's official. You really are an idiot." Her voice was amused.

I jerked my head up and stared at her. Her eyes were warm and…inviting? She came closer, and I inhaled her scent, musky and intoxicating. She reached up and drew a finger over my face, tracing the line of my jaw, and touching the new bump on my nose she had given me. I felt a warmth flood through my body, and the bump disappearing. Her power made me shiver, and I suppressed it savagely. I don't like jetti ability much; I wasn't stupid enough to refuse healing but this was unnecessary. Another bump made no difference to me. But she did it so unconsciously that I couldn't take any real offense.

I reached up and jerked her hand away. Touching her, however casually, sent a shock of electricity through me and I resisted the urge to throw her hand away. Not because I didn't want her, but because I did so much I thought I might ravage her on the spot. She looked up into my face, eyes wide. Before I knew what I had intended, I roughly yanked her up and kissed her senseless.

She was instantly on fire, and so was I. I felt her mouth soften but her kiss was as fierce as mine. Her arms twined around my neck, and her fingers dug into my scalp. I pulled her closer, completely lifting her off the ground, and explored her mouth roughly, fiercely, and thoroughly. She responded enthusiastically, and her lips parted. I plunged my tongue into her mouth, and hers battled mine, twining around and suddenly sucking hard. I heard myself groan and overpowered her tongue, sucking it into my own mouth. She moaned in return, and I felt her nails scraping down my back. I turned with her in my arms, and loosed one arm to sweep the armor off the workbench, setting her down on it. Her legs wrapped around my waist, and I ran my hands down her body.

Dimly, I thought we needed to talk first; there was something important she needed to know. But the fire raging through both of us consumed my senses, and I lost the thought in the fierce joy of her. She was whimpering and moaning and twisting in my arms, trying to reach as much of me as she could. Her hands ripped at my shirt, tearing it to shreds, and I pulled back long enough to shrug away the remnants. I pulled at hers, and it ripped down the middle. She was bare and glowing and panting, in nothing but her workout shorts. Her hair had come loose from her ponytail, curls tumbled around her face. I touched it, ran my fingers through the softness, then roughly grabbed the back of her head and hauled her mouth to mine again. She was like a wildcat in my arms, scratching my back raggedly, making me pant and want to mark her in return.

Some sanity crawled into my brain and I picked her up, hauling her out of the garage where anyone could walk in. Not that I particularly cared who saw us, but I'd be damned if, say, Atton walked in and broke the mood. We made it to the dormitory, out of our minds with lust. I elbowed the lock and all but threw her on the nearest bed. She smiled up at me, and I was with her on the narrow bunk in an instant.

The feel of her skin was scorching. Every nerve in my body was screaming. She was pulling me closer, her strength infusing itself into my very cells. I used my mouth everywhere, sucking and licking and biting, and I felt her teeth sink into my shoulder. Her flesh tasted like wild honey and spice and the biting metal of battle. She clawed at me, and I smelled blood. I could _hear_ her in my head, feel her all around me. If there ever was a Mandolorian heaven, I was in it, and this savage goddess was my reward and my punishment, judge and executioner. My world was pleasure and pain and glorious, aching need.

When we emerged from the maelstrom, I relaxed a moment, then gathered her close, shifting so I wasn't crushing her. She laid her head on my chest, gasping. I could feel her heart racing, matching the rhythm of my own. We lay there, just breathing.

I felt her body get warmer, and a tingling sensation through what skin touched her, and realized her healing had kicked in. She wisely didn't use it on me without asking, and I wondered about that moment when she repaired the bump on my nose. She hadn't asked then, and I was starting to understand enough about her to realize that she must have been a little out of control even at that moment, before I had even kissed her. I grinned at the thought that I could be so distracting. She looked up, raising her head, and cocked an eyebrow at me. I gave her a nod, and warmth flooded through me as I felt the tracks on my back and the thousand little bites and bruises heal.

"That was…incredible," she said finally, a smile of pure feline satisfaction on her lips. I kissed them, because I could, and her purr made me want to ravage her all over again.

"It was adequate," I said, smirking, and she squealed in mock outrage. She elbowed me hard in the ribs and I chuckled.

"Wildcat, you are far too easy to bait," and I grabbed the fist that was headed toward my nose. Kissing her soundly, I glanced up at the clock and sighed.

"Wildcat, hm?" Her voice was husky.

"Well, you're small enough that Wildkitten might be a better description. But it doesn't have the same ring to it."

"I suppose we better get dressed," she sighed.

"Wait here," I said, and grabbed a pair of pants out of my footlocker. I slipped them on, tossed a shirt at her, and padded barefoot out to gather the remains of our clothing. Nothing was salvageable, I saw, grinning. She was wearing my shirt, sitting on the bed rolling up the sleeves when I came in with the tattered remnants in my hand. Her face registered dismay, but then she shrugged.

"Just toss them down the incinerator," she said. "Meet me in the main area. I'll be there in just a minute." She turned back toward me, a roguish grin on her face. "Next time, let's try to get naked without ruining our wardrobes."

I grinned back. I was hoping she'd say "Next time".


	9. Chapter 9

**Jennet**

I ran down the corridor to the female dorm, and grabbed my robe. I zipped into the 'fresher, took the quickest shower in the history of the universe, and trotted back to the dorm, toweling my hair. I hauled on my clothes, and paused, Canderous's shirt in my hands. I thought about giving it back, but didn't want to. Deciding if he needed it, he'd ask, I held it to my face, breathed deep of his scent, and tucked it into my footlocker. Barefoot, I headed to the common room, an insanely happy smile on my face.

Canderous was already waiting for me, hair damp, in fresh clothes and barefoot as I was. There was a bottle of firewhiskey at his elbow with two glasses. I stopped to admire the lines of his large body and wished we could just go back to his bed, right now. My smile faded as I remembered that we were leaving in a few days. Privacy, not to mention opportunity, would be nonexistent. Well, we'd deal with it then.

I sat down, and Canderous put his arm around me. I snuggled close, smiling. I looked up into his craggy face and his blue eyes met mine with a look of satisfaction and desire that made me quiver and wish for about twelve hours of uninterrupted privacy, a large bed, and soundproof walls. He kissed me, hard, and I shivered.

Finally, I wiggled away. We needed to talk, and if I was touching him I couldn't think straight. He seemed to understand this and didn't protest when I grabbed a folding chair and sat on it backwards, facing him and putting a respectable distance between us. I folded my arms over the chair, and considered what to say. To my surprise, he beat me to it.

"Your forfeit. You wanted to know why I don't use my given name here. Well, it's a bit of a story, but we have some time. If I know Ladria, she'll keep everyone off the ship for at least another couple of hours. There's a few things we need to talk about, I think."

I nodded. "You first," I said.

He shrugged, and poured himself a drink. "Want one?" he asked, and at my nod he filled the other glass and handed it to me. I sipped appreciatively. I was earlier in the day than I usually would drink, but what the hell, I had a feeling I'd need it.

"About five years ago, I traveled on this ship with a different group of people, and we ended up saving the galaxy." There was no boastfulness in his tone, just matter-of-fact. "The leader of our little band was a woman named Cryssana. T3 was there too, and Bastila Shan, Jolee Bindo, Ju'hani, a Twi'lik named Mission Vao, a wookie named Zaalbar, and Carth Onasi. That assassin droid, HK47 was there too."

I whistled in appreciation. I knew most of those names. My parents didn't have any direct contact with the Order, but they did have friends they had kept in touch with, who would pass along news. I'd kept up the contacts after Mom died. Bastila, Jolee and Ju'hani were practically legends, and who didn't know Carth Onasi, hero of the Republic? There had been rumors all over the galaxy about them, and then the Jedi civil war hit, and the rumors faded to nothing. I didn't remember Canderous's name among them, though, and I'd never heard of Mission Vao, Zaalbak, or Cryssana.

"As it turned out, Cryssana was actually Revan, the Jedi that had defied the Order and along with Malak, convinced many Jedi to join the war against my people." At my gasp of recognition, he paused. "Yeah, it was a shock to us too, including Revan. The Jedi had captured her, impressed her with a new identity, and she had no idea at all of it until we were captured by a Sith vessel, the Leviathan. The commander, Saul, Onasi's former superior, told Onasi, Bastila, and Revan. I understand Carth killed him. I was there when Revan defeated Malak, and we destroyed the Star Forge."

It took him about forty minutes to tell the whole story. I listened, fascinated, until he was done. "Anyway, we were declared Heroes of the Republic, gave us medals and everything. Imagine, me, a Mandalorian, being honored by the very people that had nearly destroyed my race. It was – interesting. Afterward, I left and started to seek out the remnants of my people, declaring myself the Mandalore, and gathering as many as I could find on Duxun. I've been trying to rebuild my people for the last five years. Then Ladria and her band arrived at Duxun, and you know the rest."

I thought about what he had said, and was impressed again. But…"That doesn't tell me why you chose not to let them know who you were."

"I'm no hero. If I told them my name, chances were at least a couple of them would recognize it, especially Ladria. Actually, she does know; told me so just before we went to Dantooine. But I'm also sure she hasn't mentioned it to anyone. I didn't want any of them to think I was coming along for the wrong reasons. I wanted to help, yes. But I also wanted to use the opportunity to find more of my people. To travel with the name of a Hero of the Republic was more conspicuous than I thought was safe, for the people I was allying myself with, and my own peace of mind."

"I guess that makes sense. So, I'll just be careful to call you Mandalore."

"I don't think it matters much, now. Things are insane - the Jedi decimated, the Republic hanging by a thread. My own people aren't organized or numerous enough to make any sort of real stand against this threat. Who I am is the least of the problem. I like the sound of my name in your mouth, anyway," he smiled roguishly. I smiled back.

"Now, I need to talk to you about what happened to you when we fought, and why I owe you an explanation."

I looked at him, astonished. "What in the galaxy do you mean? You had nothing to do with that."

"I think I did."

I just stared, completely bewildered. "How?"

"There's a condition among my race that occurs during battle. We call it 'battle ecstasy' and almost every Mandalorian experiences it when they fight. It's different from the usual rush most fighters get. More intense, like being on battle stims; it increases awareness, constitution and reflex, while suppressing pain. During war, a connection is often forged between the warriors fighting that allow us to unite and merge this ecstasy, not unlike Jedi Battle Meditation. I think that's what you felt; my battle ecstasy. But because you weren't prepared for it, and neither was I, instead of helping you, it overwhelmed you, and blinded you to your Force ability."

I gaped at him. "Does this happen to you a lot?"

"Feeling it, sure, all the time. Sharing it…it's never happened with an outlander, ever. I've never heard of it occurring with any other race."

"But what can that mean?"

"You're absolutely sure you have no Mandalorian blood at all?"

"Pretty sure," I said. "I know my parents were from Telos and Onderon. I don't have any family left to check further."

"There's a way we can check." He pulled out a small device from his stim pack, which was sitting on the seat next to him. I hadn't noticed it before. "A small blood sample is all it takes."

I wasn't thrilled with this notion; it was too much like checking for metichlorides, like the Jedi. But the Jedi were almost extinct, and it was perfectly obvious I had enough to have been one. So I put my hand on the pad, felt the prick as the needle poked my fingertip, and watched as it analyzed my blood.

Canderous's face was stoic as ever, but I saw the complex emotions run across it anyway. He didn't seem terribly surprised, actually, but definitely didn't know what to make of the situation. Actually, that was wrong – he did seem to have an idea, but wasn't sure he was right.

"None at all," he said calmly. "Well, this is interesting indeed."

"You said that the ecstasy increases awareness, and I know that the stims do too. Maybe between that, and my Force awareness, things just got crossed. I was, after all, concentrating on you. And I wasn't, the first fight."

"That would be a nice, safe, tidy answer."

"You don't buy it, though."

"No."

"You gonna share, or do we play twenty questions until I lose patience and beat it out of you?"

"I'm not sure you'll like it."

"Try me."

He ran a hand through his hair and down over his face. He appeared to be trying to find words. He was silent so long I was ready to smack him. Finally, he said almost reluctantly, "Well…it could be that you're my mate."

"Huh?!"

"I _told_ you you might not like it."

"I didn't say that!" I snapped.

A pleased look crossed his craggy features. "Well, that's a start."

I growled something unflattering. He just grinned again. Then his face sobered, and he looked like he was trying to find words again.

"I was married once," he said abruptly.

And the revelations just keep coming. I gaped at him, then reconsidered. I knew he was considerably older than me. It only made sense he'd had a family at one time. I was pretty sure he wouldn't be with me if he still had a wife around, ergo, he was single now. Although, to be honest, I wasn't sure enough about Mandalorian mating habits to know if casual sex outside a marriage was taboo. I couldn't imagine _any_ Mandalorian male being okay with his wife sleeping around, but the reverse didn't necessarily have to be true. Maybe it was an accepted practice. But the operative word here was _once_.

"What happened?" I asked quietly.

"My wife and children were killed during the obliteration of Malchor V, my home world." I saw pain briefly flash in his eyes. "We'd been married ten years. Cardus was eight, Garic, six, Edwin, four, and Etta, two"

"I'm sorry," I said, and went over to him, putting my hand on his arm. He looked at me, and smiled tightly.

"It was a long time ago. I think about them now and then, but I haven't really thought about Gerda, my wife, in years. You remind me of her, a bit. Not to look at; you're tiny and blonde, she was tall, and sturdy, blue eyes, and had black hair down to her waist. But…she could fight, and would yell at me when she was mad, and hit me when I deserved it. She was brave, and a good cook. A good woman," He said simply. "We married young, most of my kind do, by arrangement. Her family and mine were allies. It was a good match."

"Did you love her?"

"We don't use that word much. By your standards, perhaps not. By mine, yes."

"What do you know about my standards?" I said, a little irritably. I stopped, and thought how horribly rude and selfish that sounded, considering we were talking about his dead family. "I'm sorry," I said, contrite.

"Don't be. Like I said, it was a long time ago. Losing my family and home world made me, like most Mandalorians, give up on a lot of things for a long time. Most of us didn't have a sense of identity or honor anymore. I certainly didn't until Revan came along with her crazy crusade. She made me see things differently, and it was largely because of her influence that I decided to try and help my people instead of just fading off like most of them, drifting through the galaxy. I was tired of drifting. I wanted something of my life back.

"As to what I know about your standards," he said gruffly, and I started a little. He could sure keep track of conversation threads, I'd give him that. "I would expect that your notion of love involves a lot of sharing of feelings, and understanding each other's point of view, and that your mate's well-being and happiness is more important than your own. When your mate isn't there, you feel you're missing a vital part, and you get a little crazy if you can't see them regularly. And very happy when you can."

I laughed a little; I couldn't help it. Blunt and clinical as his tone had been, he did get the essentials. "That's about it, yes. To my way of thinking, real love should be that you're not really whole without your, er, mate and that you're better together than apart. I don't want to be like Mother, and just fade away if my mate dies, but I do want to love that much. I just always thought that I'd know that I'd met the right man if he became my whole world, in a good way, and I became his. Not that I've ever had time to find one; ducking the Jedi Order kept me from staying anywhere long enough to make real connections." I eyed him thoughtfully. "I take it you and Gerda weren't like that?"

He sat back in his seat a bit, stretching his long legs and putting his hands behind his head. His blue eyes were very bright and looked at me with an expression I didn't quite identify. "Yes and no. She was important to me, and I was to her. I certainly put her and the children's well being and safety ahead of my own. She saw to my comfort when I was home; I saw to hers. She was enthusiastic in bed, and seemed to appreciate me in that respect. I certainly did with her. She was a good mother, and I genuinely looked forward to seeing her when I'd been away." His gaze was almost soft with remembrance. "But I was never wild to get home, or felt I couldn't breathe without her, she didn't drive me particularly crazy and I don't think I drove her any more insane than a man usually drives a female. We had a good life, respect, and were comfortable with each other."

"Sounds a lot like love to me," I said wistfully.

"Like I said, by my standards, it was. There are times now I wish I had told her; I think she would have liked that. But Mandalorians aren't given to speaking about it, she probably would have just shrugged and told me what was for dinner."

I laughed at that. "Very romantic. I wish I could have met Gerda. She sounds like she was an interesting woman. I think I would have liked her."

"She would have liked you too." His voice was the warmest I'd ever heard it.

"I told you all this because I want you to understand how being my true mate is different than what my life was before. And maybe how it's different – or similar – to your own expectations of a mate." He paused, and didn't seem inclined to continue right away.

"I'm not entirely buying this, but I'm willing to listen. What is different, and how do you know for sure? Is there a test, or anything like that? Blood samples? Written exam? Trial by combat?" I was being a tad sarcastic, partly because I was trying hard to suppress the rush of warmth that had hit me when he had suggested it in the first place.

He looked at me, not fooled by my tone, but ignoring it. "Actually, if it comes to proving the connection to my people, yeah, something like that."

"What?!" I yelped.

"I'm the Mandalore. I could only claim an outlander as my wife if I could prove she was my true mate. There are ways to. You'd have to stand trial, sort of, as would I. We pass the tests, and you'd be accepted and revered as the Mandalore's mate. If not, and I refuse to put you aside, I would lose my position and another would take the helm of the Mandalore. We could stay, of course, but you especially would not have a comfortable time of it. I'd live with a lot of scorn for marrying an outlander, and you'd be nearly a nonentity."

"If you did put me aside?"

"I'd have a lot of fights on my hands until I was forgiven, and proven to have gotten over my insanity. It would take years, most likely. If I didn't put you aside, and left, I'd be an outcast, and my history and family would be struck from Mandalorian records and eventually, memory."

"That's a lot to risk."

"Perhaps. We're few enough and scattered enough that living as an outcast isn't as bad as it would have been when my people were strong." He leaned back again, and looked at me seriously. "If I _can_ prove you're my mate, however, my place as Mandalore is proven without a doubt."

"Huh? Why would it?"

"Because the Mandalore is the one person of my race that is _supposed_ to have a true mate. My wife and family are dead. If I had a proven true mate, my place would be secured."

"And it wouldn't matter if she was an outlander?"

"No."

I looked at him, eyes narrowed. "This sounds awfully convenient to me."

"I figured you'd say that."


	10. Chapter 10

Thanks for the reviews and messages, everyone, I appreciate feeback immensely! Hope you enjoy, and review if you are so inclined. Thanks, LJ

* * *

I sighed. "All right, how about you tell me what the signs are of a true mate, and why you think I might be yours."

"Fair enough. I told you about battle ecstasy. True mates can sense each other's and grow stronger because of it. They are in tune with one another, able to sense each other over distance and time. One would be able to tell if the other is in trouble, and track them through the connection if they needed to. It's a sort of telepathy. Once you're really in tune, you can hear each other's thoughts."

I thought about how well I could read him, right from the start, and shivered a little. But I pointed out, "You said all warriors can sense and feed off the battle ecstasy. And what you describe is pretty much like using the Force."

"True. But the battle binding isn't individual; it won't kick in with less than, say, twenty fighters. If I'm fighting with a small band, that power would not be available to us. I've heard of it happening in time of great need with as few as five warriors, but that is rare. To sense it on a one-to-one basis is rarer still. A true mate is a huge asset; you both are stronger because of the other, and can feed each other that strength, even over great distances. If I'm right, and you are my mate, you could eventually be able to heal me, even if you were on Duxun, and I on Dantooine. Just for example."

I gaped at that. "That is unbelievable."

"I'm sure it sounds so to you."

"Okay, if this is such a good deal for a Mandalorian, how come everybody doesn't wait to find their mates? Why the arranged marriages?"

"Because of how rare it is. My people are not particularly Force sensitive. It's my opinion that the abilities of mates stem from the Force. True mates crop up only once a few generations or so. We acknowledge that it happens, but we're a pragmatic people. We might look for it from time to time, and part of the Mandalore's duty is to try and locate his, but we're not sentimental. If a true mate isn't available, we are content to marry where it's practical and comfortable. Even the Mandalore isn't absolutely required to have one, it's just better when he does. I don't think there's been a Mandalore with a true mate in about four generations."

I mulled over the information for a while. He was making logical sense, but it still felt too pat to me. We'd just met each other, fer Gods' sake, and here he was, talking mates and connections and forever. Sure, there were signs he was right, but most of them could have other explanations.

Selfishly, somewhere deep inside, where my female vanity lives, didn't want to accept it because I wanted him to want me for _me_, not my possible asset as a mate. I wanted him to love me, just because I _was_. I didn't expect him to actually say it, and I wasn't sure I wanted to be with someone who couldn't.

I sighed. "I don't know. What you say makes sense, I guess, but…It just seems so damned coincidental." _And I would have been nice if you had considered me a mate without all this._

"I did."

"Did what?" I asked, confused.

"Think about you as a mate before you sensed my battle ecstasy." He sounded perfectly matter of fact. But I hadn't said that out loud, did I? Gods, I'm losing it. I must have.

"No, you didn't."

"Didn't what?" I asked, starting to really get freaked out now.

"Say it out loud. I heard it, well more felt it, and saw it on your face. It's already working." He sounded smug.

"Well I'm not hearing anything, and you've already shown you're pretty good at reading me. Doesn't prove a thing." I snapped.

"You're unconsciously blocking me; you don't want to believe it might be true. Look at it this way: you live by the Force, right?" Watching Canderous in lecture mode was like seeing Disciple provoke a barroom brawl. You know it _could_ happen, it's just really, really disturbing when it does.

"Yeah," I said, unhelpfully.

"And your training with the force has taught you that there are no coincidences."

"Point for you." I said sullenly.

"Look at the amazing amount of factors that brought us together. You crashed here, leaving you stranded. How did that happen, anyway?"

I answered reluctantly, "The engine blew a power coupling. I had replaced only a month before. Came out of the blue."

"Yeah, well, you see? You crash because of a freak part failure. The Ebon Hawk has been at this port about five times in the last few months, and we haven't run into each other until yesterday. It's a big planet; we might have _never_ met, yet there I was in the cantina when you were attacked by a whole mess of mercs. I did notice you when I walked in, but dismissed you as some kid the bartender let in. I hadn't even known I was going to that place until the last minute; it was one of about six I had heard about. You get knocked out, which I know now isn't easy to do. I take you to the ship, which just happens to have a bunch of jetti on board, which you have been avoiding your whole life. If you hadn't been hiding your abilities from them, you wouldn't have thrown the first fight, I wouldn't have gotten mad about it, and that led me to using the stim and pushing you beyond what you usually have to for a simple one-on-one sparring. That, as you know, led to your sensing my battle ecstasy, and this conversation. If ever, by your own beliefs, the Force was at work, wouldn't you say it was now?"

"Maybe," I said shortly.

"I meant it. I did think about you as a permanent relationship well before our second fight. I was pissed as hell I was even considering it – called myself all kinds of a damned fool. I asked for that kiss as forfeit because I figured it would be the closest you'd ever let me get."

"Really?" I asked in a small voice. I was happier with this idea, not so much he'd been mad about it.

"Really. I was only mad because it was unlike me to want someone as – " _beautiful as you, and who was jetti. I could have lost everything if I claimed you, and I didn't care._

"You were ready to give up everything for me, even then?" I asked, utterly shocked. I hadn't even noticed that he hadn't said it out loud.

"Yes." His smile was triumphant, and I didn't understand why.

We stared at each other, and he scooped me up and kissed me, hard. Then he set me down, and said "Go into the dorm."

"Why?"

"Trust me. Go in there, shut the door, and listen for me. Just do what I tell you to." He gave me a push in the general direction. When I looked stubborn, he smacked my ass, not hard, just enough to get my attention, and asked "Please?"

The 'please' got me moving. I walked into my dorm, closed the door, and sat on my bunk. I listened for him, and eventually heard him shout, "Come out now, and put on that shirt of mine you put in your locker."

How had he known that? I grumbled, then pulled out the shirt and put it on over my other clothing.

When I got to the common room, he grinned. "You did hear me," he said with satisfaction.

"Well of course I did, you moron, you yelled."

"I didn't talk at all."

"I heard you!"

"That's a five centimeter steel door. Can _you_ project your voice from here loud enough to been heard in that room without a comm?"

"You have a really big voice," I said stubbornly. "And you could have been right outside the door."

He looked at me, his face going very calm. He said in a very quiet voice that made me squirm, "Do you really think I would have so little honor as to trick you like that?"

"Um, no." I said. I would have hung my head, but he didn't seem like he needed that much contrition. "I'm sorry. But…I'm having a hard time getting my head around this."

"Understandable. Forgiven. This time. Now, I'll go into the dorm, and you call." And without further ado, strode into the men's side of the ship. I heard the door slide shut.

I sat for a while, unsure what to do. Then, shrugging, I decided to make it interesting. I called with my mind, _Canderous, come out here, don't say anything, just go to the table and drink off your glass of firewhiskey. Then put the glass on the deck, and stomp it._

Which is exactly what he did. He even thought to put on his boots so I wouldn't have to heal him. I stared, and suddenly started to tremble.

He held me for a while, just let me shake. Finally, I looked up at him and said "This is awfully big."

"Yeah. Is it really so bad to be mine?"

"Not if you love me."

"I'm not good at that."

"You'll get better."

"Probably."

"Is it so bad to be mine?" I asked back.

He set me back a little, so I could see his face. He didn't smile, but I saw the truth of his words. "I didn't know it yesterday when I went to the cantina. But it's all I ever wanted."


	11. Chapter 11

**Canderous**

There have been very few times in my life I wished I could be better at talking, even less so about dealing with outlander women. I'd known Jennet about a day now, and in that time I'd at least tripled my total in both. I've said she talks enough for both of us. Mostly, that works for me; a nod here and there is usually sufficient to get me through. But sometimes I just wish I could say the perfect thing. I think I did okay, this time.

The last few hours I'd said more in one stretch than I usually say in a week. I hadn't made a complete damned fool of myself, at least. She wasn't running away, screaming incoherently, and she seemed even to think I'd made sense.

Being my mate…that was _big_. It was rare enough that I was bemused that I even had one, let alone found her. That she was a Telan/Ondorani half breed with no Mandalorian blood was even more mind blowing. I don't argue the Force exists; I've seen too much to not believe it. My race being short on the Force sensitivity, we just don't put much stock in it when it comes to our own lives. I do notice though that it has a bitch of a sense of humor.

To distract her, after she had stopped shaking and I'd for once in my life, it seemed, said something exactly right, I asked, "So what did you do to piss off the Exchange _and_ the Hutts?"

She looked at me, completely nonplussed at the abrupt change of subject. "What?"

I repeated myself, adding without speaking that I was trying to give her time to assimilate things. Hell, I was trying to give myself time to assimilate.

She smiled, and I knew she'd gotten the message. I was starting to really appreciate this ability; it saved time and misunderstandings.

_Got that right Hunkalicious..._

I looked up sharply and saw her innocent look firmly on her face. I scowled menacingly.

_Do not, under any circumstances, **ever** call me that again, even in my head. Especially in my head. Ever._

After all, there's a limit to what a man can take, even for a mate. I heard her giggle in my head.

_Oh this is going to be fun._

Yep, the Force has a bitch of a sense of humor. Jetti must be masochists, the lot.

"Exchange. Hutts. You were going to tell me?"

"Oh. Yeah. Well, it was a misunderstanding, at first." She looked sheepish.

"I'll bet."

"No, really. I had been here a couple of months, and I'd entered the battle ring a few times to earn some credits. I did pretty well."

I grunted; no point in feeding her ego with the obvious. She grinned.

"I had also brought in a few bounties, and was starting to get a rep. I had been listening close to rumor and such and heard that a slaver was targeting children."

I glowered grimly. I've mentioned I hate slavers in general, those who prey on children particularly. I nodded for her to continue. The conversation was interesting; I was getting as much if not more off her non-verbally as she was saying out loud. I made a mental note that we were going to have to learn how to be more selective in the mental department; it was nice, great even, but there _is_ such a thing as too much information, and everyone needs _some_ privacy, even from their mate.

_I agree. Let's try to tone this down a bit._ Her tone was serious, and her mind in mine was warm and caressing.

_You're the one used to this sort of thing. Any ideas?_

_Well, try imagining a force field between your mind and mine. Make it strong enough to bounce a blaster shot off it._

_Okay, _I answered doubtfully. I imagined it as she suggested and felt the connection suddenly cut off.

"Good. Now thin it out until you can still feel me, but not my actual thoughts."

I tried that. I heard her in my head again, _too thin, _and tried to block her better. We practiced a while, and eventually got to a point where we could feel each other but not necessarily actual words. She smiled, but then looked concerned.

"I'm glad we're not going to hear each other's every stray thought. But if this is supposed to strengthen each other, isn't is counterproductive to have to block all the time? What if I need to let you know something, and you're blocking and I can't get through? I mean, is that normal, to block continuously? "

"How would I know? I told you it was rare. I'm not exactly in the Mandalorian hall of history to be able to research the situation."

"No need to snap." She said mildly.

"I'm not snapping. Well okay, maybe I am. Sorry. But we gotten this far, in a very short time. I'm sure we'll figure it out."

"Let me try something. Trust me?"

"Yes."

"Sit down with me, here one the floor."

I did, facing her.

"This is a Jedi technique. Don't get defensive; it's all I know and it might help. Just breathe deep, close your eyes, and listen to my voice." I had jerked a little at the mention of jetti but knew she was right. In this, she was the general and I was a green recruit. I didn't like that feeling much but I did trust her.

I listened as she talked soothingly, and together, we managed to find a middle ground between total invasion and complete isolation. It wasn't perfect, but I sensed we were on the right track.

"So, about the Hutts and Exchange?" I asked when we were ready to move on.

"Oh yeah. Well, I tracked the slavers down and managed to raid their holding area and rescue the children. I got them down to the Refugee section, and the leaders there made sure they were hidden."

"What was the catch?" I asked. With our new level of awareness, I was feeling her emotions as she spoke, rather than having to interpret them by tone. Occasionally, a thought of hers would come through. I was as interested in this sideline as her story. Right now, she was remembering how angry she had been about the kids being stolen, and how scared they had been when she found them. Her rage toward the slavers was magnificent.

"I killed everyone in the complex when I went in there, and made the littler kids close their eyes when we trooped past the bodies, with the older ones holding their hands and guiding them through. What I didn't know is that one of the men I'd killed was a nephew of one of the higher ups in the Exchange." Her dismay at this came through. She didn't regret a bit killing him, and would do it again given the circumstances. But she wasn't happy at the attention.

"Not good," I agreed. "Not that you had a choice."

"Well, no. I couldn't have left the kids there. Anyway, I'd covered my tracks pretty well but eventually the Exchange figured out who was behind the raid and the death of the nephew. They were clever; I didn't hear a breath about it until they set me up. In retaliation, they paid off the Hutt to turn off the energy dampeners at my next fight in the battle ring."

"Clever." It was dirty, but I had to admire the tactic. It got rid of her, accidentally enough so everyone would look the other way, but it would be clear that her death was a message to anyone thinking of crossing the Exchange. They obviously gravely underestimated Jennet, but it was a sound plan.

"Yeah. Except it didn't work, obviously. The Hutt sent two against me that day; claimed I was winning too easily and this would increase the odds. Which was more or less true. Unfortunately, Hutts are pretty much Force dead. I don't get anything off them, so I didn't see the trap. I was smart enough to know something was up but I didn't see what. He _was_ stupid enough to have told the fighters, and I got a flash off them. Not until the fight started, but it was enough, and I killed them. The two best fighters of the battle ring, after me."

I whistled. Not because she had won; that wasn't surprising. But to kill off two valuable assets of a Hutt is definitely not a healthy thing to do.

"Exactly. The Hutt accused _me_ of rigging the game, which of course was his way of covering his own ass. That's when I told him to go fuck himself. I was a bit pissed off at the time. I said a few other stupid things too," she added ruefully. "Of course, I had to fight my way out of there, and a couple more of the Hutt's fighters died, along with a few bodyguards. I knew I had to disappear fast, and couldn't go back to my apartment. Fortunately, I had pretty much everything I owned with me. I had enough credits to at least book passage, or buy a junker ship that could limp to the next space station. That last fight was supposed to pay enough to buy a decent ship." She grimaced with the memory, and I felt her frustration.

"I went straight to the docks, hoping I got there before the Hutt and the Exchange could regroup, but no luck. Every ship's captain and port authority had my name and holo, with orders to turn me in on sight, and permission to kill if I resisted. I got out of there, but ended up killing a couple of Exchange security guards doing it. After that, security was even tighter. I had been trying for a week to try to even stow away when I met you. I had made a friend of a merchant near the dock, and he kept me informed of the rumors, and another of a low-end dock worker, who was going to let me know if he heard of any way I could get off planet. He was the one that told me about the captain I was supposed to meet at the cantina. Some friend," she sighed.

"By that time, I didn't trust anyone, but I had to take the chance it might be true. I had been moving around, not staying anywhere longer than a day or two. I told you about my apartment blowing up. They had found where I'd moved that morning. Caught me when I was asleep; I woke to glass shattering, and just had enough time to dive out the window before the grenade went off. Killed the bounty hunters in the alley, but had to run before I could relieve them of their weapons – an Exchange patrol heard the noise and were entering the alley. Got out over a wall and hid some more until it was time to go to the cantina. The Refugee sector was no good, the Exchange had them by the throat and I couldn't risk leading them back to the kids. So I hid in plain view, in the bar with the poison gas, under a full face gas mask I stole from one of the bouncers I tapped on the head."

"So what was the 'misunderstanding', exactly?"

"The Exchange assumed I was working for them; I assumed I could get away with crossing them," she admitted ruefully. I chuckled.

"I don't think you're going to have any more problems now," I said. "At least not with the Exchange. With the Hutts, probably, but it it's known you're with us now, they'll likely leave you alone."

She looked at me with surprise. "Oh? Why?"

I explained how we'd raided Go-To's yacht, and how the Exchange was crippled on Nar Shadaa. "The Hutts are now in charge of the planet. They probably still want you dead, but won't risk killing you outright if they think we'll go after them next. I'd bet that that last attack on you in the cantina was more of a last ditch effort."

She'd caught on to something, though. "Go-To? That's what that weird droid that didn't talk or beep is?"

"Yeah. Ladria's not pleased about it, but doesn't want to destroy it yet. Sort of an insurance the Exchange will stay off our backs. The Exchange appears to be on our side for now; they know about the rip in the Force and want us to fix it. We're hoping that's true; the last thing we need right now is to be fighting two fronts at the same time."

"I see. Smart. I don't have to like it though. Well, the Exchange certainly knows where I am, and no one's tried to kill me but you." She grinned.

"Don't remind me," I growled.

"I heard a little about you guys, I guess, but not that the Exchange was no longer in power. I wonder why not."

"Well, according to Go-To, they've had a bit of a truce with the Hutts. The Exchange won't make a bid to take back Nar Shadaa if the Hutts don't announce that the Exchange is gone for at least a month. The Exchange could do it, and the Hutts know it. But they've decided to move on, rather than rebuild. Apparently, they don't want to weaken their position on other ports by appearing weak. Plus they know we're here. We tore them up on Telos too," I said with satisfaction.

"Speaking of Hutts, I had an idea," I suddenly had a thought. "We need to get you used to sensing my battle ecstasy, and the only way to do that is to be in a controlled fight. An uncontrolled one could get you killed."

She grimaced. "Good point. What's your idea?"

"We're going to need to go shopping, and Mira."

She looked at me, and I could feel her surprise and amusement. "I have a feeling I'm not going to like this."

"I think you will. Trust me." I gave her my best no shit grin.

She scrambled into my lap, and bit my ear, not too gently. "Do we have to comm her right away?"

"No," I rumbled back.

"Good."

This time, we didn't 'ruin our wardrobes' getting naked.


	12. Chapter 12

**Jennet**

Making love with Canderous was the most mind-blowing, physically challenging, yet relaxing thing I've ever experienced. He wasn't tender, but he was completely _there_, mind, body, soul. He knew I could take his strength, and trusted me with his heart. All right, he didn't have much of a choice with this mate thing, but because we could now share so much so easily, I also knew now that he would have even without out connection. It was an incredible feeling.

Yes, I said love. I knew he felt it, even if he didn't say it out loud, and even shied away from it in is thoughts. I didn't harp on it. I just let him feel me, and gave him time to get used to it. I didn't say it either; no point in forcing issues.

After we shared a wonderfully erotic and enthusiastic post-coitus shower and had dressed, Canderous commed Mira, asking her to meet us on board. Predictably, she hauled along everyone she could find, namely, the entire crew. Apparently, Canderous and I are the local entertainment. I mentioned something along these lines. He replied it didn't matter, he wanted to talk to everyone anyway.

Canderous had kept himself well shielded about his latest plan. It was almost scary how easily he was learning to use the connection we shared. We had decided to tell the rest of the group everything. It was too important - the danger I potentially possessed not only to my own safety but theirs was too great. Not to mention my absolute frustration at the thought of having to stay on board, useless, while everyone else was fighting for their lives if we couldn't fix it. I had not one doubt Canderous would find a way to physically restrain me if I refused to stay behind. I didn't look forward to being the object of his creativity.

_Bet your ass I would, _Canderous's amused thought flit through. _Smart of you to know it._

_Oh shut up, _I scowled. His being right didn't mean I had to like it. His chuckle was warm in my head.

Canderous and I brought everyone up to speed. Atton, predictably, laughed delightedly and gave Carderous some shit about being brought low by a mere scrap of a woman. Canderous glowered.

"Rand, you have a choice: Shut the fuck up, or I'll let her make you." I glowed at this endorsement. Canderous was acknowledging me as his true equal. I smiled at Atton evilly, winking to soften my expression. Unrepentant, he grinned back and muttered an insincere apology. I let it be; Canderous did too after a quick thought from me about not having time for squabbles.

While we were waiting for everyone to show, I had cooked lunch; enough for the whole crew. I was wolfing down a bowl of stew and got up for more. With all the events of the day so far, I needed fuel. Bao Dur watched me eat, fascinated, and I could tell he was making note to make sure we had plenty of food supplies. I didn't let it embarrass me, much.

"So here's my plan," Canderous's deep voice was continuing. He had done bulk of explaining our situation, and had answered a few questions while I had been getting my third bowl of stew. "The Hutts might leave her alone now, but they sure as hell won't let her enter the fight ring again. I've thought about it, and that seems the best venue for her to come to grips with battle ecstasy safely." Everyone nodded. It did make sense.

"How will she get in? They know her by sight." Ladria pointed out.

Canderous glanced at Mira. "That's where we need your help. We need to disguise Jennet well enough that they don't recognize her. I don't think the Hutts know she's with us yet, even with Go-To 'bot hanging around. The Exchange will keep to their bargain with the Hutts, but they won't want to give away too much, and a chance to make them look foolish would have appeal, so I don't expect Go-To's spilled to the Hutts where she is. If Jennet and I can enter a few fights, it will give us an opportunity to work out the kinks in our connection. Earn a few credits too, which might help us all in getting prepared for the rest of our mission."

The details were discussed. Ladria and Mira left to purchase what they needed. Atton and Disciple headed out to procure provisions. Canderous went with Bao Dur on his own errand. I stayed put with Visas, out of sight. The Ebon Hawk was in a private hanger, and no dock workers came in without permission. As far as I knew, no one had seen me when I had arrived; Canderous wanted to keep it that way.

Visas and I used the time to get better acquainted. She was a really warm person, intelligent, and dedicated to making up for her fall to the Dark side. We swapped a few war stories, and she gave me some tips about meditation that might help Canderous and me. She seemed to approve of my reservations about becoming Jedi, even with so few left that a Padawan of any age would be welcome. Not because she didn't like me or think I'd be a good Jedi, but because she agreed with personal choice and how complicated it would make things with Canderous and me if I chose it. It was the first real conversation with another woman I'd had in years, and I found I had missed it. Within an hour, everyone was back, and I was sorry we'd have to postpone more girl talk.

Mira and I disappeared into the female dorm and emerged an hour later. There was a general murmur of admiration for our efforts. I was changed enough that I hardly recognized myself. Mira had somehow managed to tame my curls; my hair was now straight, a little shorter, and in a careless shaggy cut, a nondescript brown rather than blonde. A simple implant made my eyes an electric blue, almost exactly the color of Canderous's. My skin, usually rather pale, now had an olive cast to it. Mira assured me nothing was permanent, and could be discarded with a good shower. She had dressed me much like herself: a cut down to there shirt that bared my navel, and showed a lot of cleavage, low slung trousers that fit like a second skin. High boots hugged my calves. I felt less dressed than being naked, but I did rather like the light in Canderous's eyes when he saw me. Atton was ogling shamelessly, and I felt Canderous notice and restrain himself from hitting our pilot upside the head. Even Disciple was open-mouthed. Bao Dur was serene as ever, but a small light of appreciation was there.

"Nice job," the male voices of our party chorused, minus Canderous, and Mira grinned.

_Don't ever go out in public in that after today, _I heard in my head. I smiled impudently back.

_I don't know; I'm thinking of changing my look._

His glower made me laugh.

Then Canderous gave me a beautiful gift. He'd gone to a weapons merchant and found a fibersteel shirt, with arm and leg pieces to match. He'd altered everything to fit me, and they felt like part of my skin when I put them on. They were perfect; I could move easily, and it was lighter than air. I marveled at his skill and speed in getting it ready. I was moving to kiss the shit out of him when he produced a blaster with holster, and a pair of gorgeous Twi'lik spinning swords. Atton flinched a little when he saw them, I made a note to ask why later. I sighed in rapture, and gave them a twirl to test the weight. A few moves, and they felt like extensions of my arms. I jumped on Canderous, wrapping my legs around his waist and kissing him breathless with incoherent babblings of thanks. Atton and Mira made "Get a room" noises; everyone else just laughed or looked away. Canderous grinned, then suited up himself.

We all left then, with HK-47, Go-To and T3 in charge of guarding the ship. We made our way to the Hutt dens and the battle ring. Conversation was loud all around us, and I tuned out the chatter to scope the general mood. The really good fighters had been thinned out considerably, largely due to me. I caught anticipation at our arrival that maybe some good fights were coming. I translated this to Canderous silently, and he acknowledged with a pat on my arm. Then he went up to the Hutt in charge, and started bargaining. Within a few minutes, our first fight was agreed on.

He came over to me, and said low, "we're going up against three of them. One uses a heavy blaster, one a double blade, and the last a blade in both hands. I asked for the best. Ready?"

I nodded. The others spread out a little to watch. They were there both to support us generally, and to be on hand if things went sour. Canderous and I entered the ring, shaking our joints out to loosen them. The Hutt made an announcement, and the fight was on.

The guy with the blaster hung back, pumping energy steadily at us. Canderous stayed back, returning fire, and I stepped forward with my swords to meet the other two. One, a female not much bigger than me, was very good. She was the one that used two blades, and whirled them with admirable precision. The other, a man not much smaller than Canderous, wielded his double bladed vibroblade with skill, if not finesse. He was big though, and had reach on me. I was kept busy blocking the both of them, but my slowed sight kept me out of danger. Then Canderous was with me, and I felt his ecstasy kick in.

He'd dispatched the third quickly, and had drawn his own sword. With a crash of steel, the four of us feinted and parried and lunged. I let Canderous flow through me, trying to keep the fire he transmitted contained. I opened to the force, and felt all my senses merge to a song of pure joy and deadly intent. Remembering how it had started to use me, I concentrated on keeping it at a level of useful awareness. It rose higher, seeking to break free. I struggled to control it as I fought the woman in front of me. She saw something of it in my face and smiled cruelly, aiming her blade at my head. I danced away, spun around, and followed with a blow that would have taken her arm off if it weren't for the energy dampeners. I honestly don't know how they work; I'd decided long ago it was just magic and not to let it worry me. She dropped that blade, but the other one stepped up its pace and tried to slip in to an opening at my waist. I smacked the sword aside, immediately following up with a thrust from my other hand and she went down. The joy sang all around, but I had it now and it didn't overwhelm me. I turned to the last fighter, just as Canderous got in a last blow that dropped him like a stone.

We were declared winners, the fighters were healed, and the Hutts grudgingly gave us our winnings. It had been too easy, and I was worried.

_What are the Hutts playing at? _I asked Canderous silently. _Do you think they know it's me, after all?_

_Nah, I think they're just wary about losing any more fighters, or discouraging the ones they have. You sure did a number on them, Wildcat._

_If that's their best, we're not going to learn much._

When will I learn not to get cocky? The Force loves hubris.

_Don't worry, I've got it covered._

He went up to the Hutt again, and the bargaining started all over. Eventually they came to terms, and Canderous let me know what happened. Six, this time. Two used blasters and single blades, one a double blade, one a single but monstrous two-handed sword, the others two swords apiece. This should be interesting.

The fight started a bit slow. They had all seen the first one and were wary of letting us get too close, and intent on separating us. Canderous again hung back to keep the blasters busy, leaving four to me. I felt the ecstasy flood me right away and managed to let it mix with my other senses. Suddenly, I felt a heightening of all my abilities, and saw the four swordsmen approach me as if they were walking under water. I felt Canderous behind and to the side of me, coolly and efficiently plugging the snipers. My four were attempting to surround me, and I ramped into high gear, dancing around their flank and taking out one with a vicious blow to the head. The other three were tracking me and using their swords with skill, but couldn't land a blow; my beautiful blades were everywhere at once, blocking. I got under a second's guard with a hard thrust to the gut; he went down and stayed there. The other two had closed in on me, and I felt a hit to my left arm. I ignored it, wrenched the blade over my shoulder and blocked his next thrust, while simultaneously parrying the one in front of me. Then Canderous was there, taking care of him, and I whirled to face the one behind me. It was the two-handed sword wielder. He was quick, but with my heightened awareness it was almost laughably easy to avoid his thrust. I crossed my swords over his, shoved down hard, and kicked him in the face over the blades. He went down, and the fight was over.

We left the circle, and Canderous went to take care of business again. After a much longer debate, he nodded to the Hutt and came back. Ladria had healed both of us in the interim, and I was feeling good.

"This one will be tough. They're sending everyone against us."

My jaw dropped. "How many?"

"Fifteen. On the up side, the payoff is great. Eighteen thousand credits."

"Well," I said doubtfully, "at least they can't kill us, right?"

"Accidents do happen," Canderous said unhelpfully.

"How many blasters?"

"Three. They didn't want to make it too easy," his tone was gleeful, and there was an unholy light in his eyes.

"For us or them?" I groaned.


	13. Chapter 13

This battle was chaos from the start. Canderous took out the first blaster quickly, but the others had been using the mass of humanity swarming around me as a shield. I felt him dash sidewise to get a better shot as I flung myself into the fray. The ecstasy was in high gear and my other senses were kicking in and merging with it. I felt myself this time allowing the flow of it to go back and forth between us. I _saw_ it through Canderous's eyes when he took out the second and third blasters; a two quick power blasts right to their heads. He dispatched four swordsmen who started toward him; I felt his satisfaction and exaltation as he joined the melee.

This new development didn't interfere with my own situation. It was like watching two holos at once, in different languages, but being able to keep up and translate. We were so in tune I could tell he was experiencing the same thing. He was adjusting quickly to my own abilities, and even though he couldn't use the Force, I could, through him; the result was almost as if he was. We were basically keeping things at a holding pattern while we both got used to it.

At the start, I had kept the enemy between me and the blasters, making it difficult to get a shot at me without damaging their allies. Once that threat was past, I was kept busy, my blades whirling and spinning, blocking and thrusting. I saw a sword slip under my own, smacked it aside with the other, and throwing the wielder's arm wide. A quick thrust, and I was turning to the next. I felt Canderous fight his way to me, and turned so we would be back to back. We were a tight circle of deadly steel; no one wanted to get too close, but I could feel their confidence in their numbers. Canderous's and my movements became like a dance; I followed his lead, and we turned as one, watching each other's back. His ecstasy flew even higher, and I started to feel my head swim. I fought it off, but a couple of good blows got through while I was adjusting. I tried speaking to Canderous.

_Watch for my signal; I want to try something._

_You sure it's a good time to do that?_

_Trust me._

I felt his mental shrug, and conveyed as best I could what I wanted him to do. We were down to nine now, and they were ranging around us, grinning. He _threw_ his sword at one, and they went down. I called

_NOW!_

We had been turning, but instead of turning back to back with him, I spun toward him. He was waiting, crouched, and I thrust a boot into his hands and felt him heave as I was thrown up and over the heads of our enemies. It took less than an instant. I felt his laugh of pure joy in my head as I flew. I stuck one fighter as I tumbled, landed lightly, and I took out two more before they knew I was behind them. The other five were ranged around Canderous, who had not retrieved his sword. I felt him duck under the blades and charge. I got one, he got two more with a wicked tackle that knocked them both off their feet. He made sure they stayed down, and I threw myself in front of the two that were going for him as he bent.

One fighter I had thought was out managed a hard blow to my head from beside me and I staggered, almost falling into Canderous. I felt my sight start going grey around the edges. He grabbed a sword, plucking it right out of his opponent's grip, so fast I had no idea how. He roared, and my vision cleared as a wave of his energy slammed into me. We turned as one and met the remaining two fighters together, sweeping their blades aside and thrusting with perfect synchronization. We both swept in a circle, saw the groaning bodies littered around, and stood straight, me sheathing my swords, Canderous dropping his borrowed one and retrieving his own.

We were engulfed by our group, who were whooping and cheering. Handshakes, hugs, and slaps on the back went all around. Atton kissed me soundly, just to get a rise out of Canderous, and I saw Ladria flinch a little. I slapped Atton's face hard enough to let him know I didn't appreciate his game. He actually looked contrite, then ashamed when he saw Ladria standing there. She had regained her composure and looked as enthusiastic as everyone else, but I noticed she kept her face averted from Atton. Canderous glowered, but I threw myself into his arms and distracted him with a very involved kiss of my own.

Of course, that was when everything went to hell. I had forgotten: You can pull one over on a Hutt, but you'll always pay for it, and they _never_ enjoy losing money. I was ripped from Canderous by two huge wide-mouthed thugs that hadn't bathed in recent history; possibly ever. I went limp, but their grip was merciless and just tightened further, wrenching me upright and frog-marching me to the Hutt. Canderous roared and tried to follow, but another four grabbed him. I wasn't sure they could hold him back long, but these guys were insanely strong, and stupid to boot. They were so Force dead I could barely register that they breathed. Actually, I wished they wouldn't; I wanted to heave when one blasted a foul exhale my way. I suspected they were some sort of awful genetic experiment gone wrong.

The rest of the group was now surrounded by about thirty people, all with weapons, poised to shoot or slice anyone who moved. I had sent a healing blast at Canderous and myself; I wanted us both in completely top shape for whatever happened. The toad guys retained their grip on me while the Hutt looked me over slowly. His gaze was cold, calculating, slimy, and lewd all at once. Canderous snarled in my head about taking the slimy bag of guts' eyes as a trophy.

_Calm down, _I answered. _Whatever I say or do, DO NOT overreact. Watch for an opening. Be ready._

_What are you going to do?_

_I don't know. I'll figure it out as I go._

_Don't do anything stupid, _he warned.

_Who, me?_

The Hutt finished ogling me and said in his awful burbley voice, "Jennet Jax, did you think me such a fool to not recognize you through a little face paint and hair dye?"

"Um, yeah," I said brightly. "That's about right."

That earned me a slap across the face, hard. Canderous growled deep and had two of his toad guys shook off before the Hutt snapped, "Take one more step, and I'll have them rip her in two." The toads pulled in demonstration and I couldn't help it; I screamed. They had wrenched my arms and legs out of their sockets. I closed my eyes, went limp, and toadies loosened their grip a little. Not enough to get me free, as if I could have with four dislocated limbs anyway. Just enough that when I sent healing through me, the joints weren't far out of place. Blessed relief. I stayed in the same pose of pain, however. They never noticed a thing.

Canderous had bellowed when the toadies had ripped at my limbs, but stayed put. I had no idea what to do now, I really didn't. The Hutt just looked at me with his dead greedy eyes and then over at Canderous.

"I know you," he said to Canderous. "You worked for Davik Kang on Taris about five years ago. Rumor is that you killed him and stole his ship. Davik double crossed the Hutts on that planet just before his demise, and you helped him. I and my kin want you dead. How considerate of you to make it easy for me." He made a gesture, and my world shattered. Quick as lighting, one of the sword wielders stepped forward and slit Canderous's throat.

_NO!!!!!!!!!!_

I didn't know if the scream was in my head, or his, or out loud, but it didn't matter. Canderous staggered back, clutching his throat and making horrid sucking choking sounds. I had no conscious thought left; only action. I threw a blast of healing his way and felt it slam into him. The awful sounds stopped, but he still fell to his knees. Blood was everywhere.

The roar that escaped my throat was as bestial as any Canderous had ever uttered. I wrenched my arms away from the toadies and felt my shoulders go again. I slammed my body against the nearest one, feeling the shoulder joint snap back in place, and snatched his blaster out of its holster. I was shooting almost as soon as I touched it; the toady went down after four shots. The other one was slow to figure out what had happened, and I took him out right behind his friend. The Hutt was trying to escape by powering up his lounger; stupid of him not to have had it ready to go. I blasted the control panel of the lounger and knew he'd stay put. I swung other my arm in a circle, ignoring the pain, and felt that side snap back. Dropping the blaster, I drew my swords.

Ladria, Atton, Bao Dur, Mira, Visas, and Disciple were already in action, slicing and dicing their way through the crowd. If I had had any thought left that was coherent it would have been in admiration. As it was, I was busy. I scanned everyone fighting, and suddenly I was confronted by about five angry fighters bent on killing me. I danced around their lunges and slashes. I was irritated, I didn't have time for this. I was still in the rage that had taken me when the Hutt tried to kill Canderous. I never did figure out what happened, but pretty soon all five were dead, then another three, then two more. They kept coming; I kept killing. I spotted something useful, dropped one sword, and snagged it off a body. Turning, ignoring the rest of the battle and possible danger to myself, I loped back to the Hutt and stood in front of him.

Hutts are powerful, but their movement is limited and slow. If they get you close enough to squeeze, you can get dead pretty quick, but if you stay out of reach, an infant can evade them. He didn't try; he just looked at me with those dead eyes and saw the blood in mine. I wasn't thinking of anything, except that this waste of flesh had tried to kill my world.

_That's a nice thought._

Canderous's voice was back, and relief flooded me, but I was still pissed. My foot snapped up and crushed into the Hutt's face. The ugly sack of guts bellowed in pain and I tossed the primed frag grenade I'd grabbed down his throat. Another kick snapped his mouth shut and caused him to involuntarily swallow.

"DOWN!!" I put everything into that shriek, voice and mind. I saw a flurry of bodies taking cover, and hoped my friends found safety. I dove for Canderous; he caught me and threw us behind an overturned table as the Hutt exploded.

Hutt blood is yellow, and gooey, not liquid exactly, I discovered. More like a strange gel. It doesn't drip, it glops. There was a lot of it when I stood up, over everything. Our group was battered, but all were alive. Still high from rage and battle, I looked around. The last of the Hutt's troops had been dispatched. Atton was on the floor, not moving, but I could see he was breathing. Ladria was going to him. I looked at the pile of decimated flesh across the room and felt sick. I found a corner and gave up trying to stomach it out.

Canderous was there, reaching for me. I held him off for a moment, and glared up at him. "Don't ever do that again!" I shouted, and hit him across the face. Then I started to cry, and shake.

I could feel his laughter rumbling though his chest as he held me. "Can't promise anything," he said.

I looked up into the face that in such a short time I found I couldn't imagine my life without. My eyes were blurred with tears. Still trembling, I wiped them away. There was something wrong; he was still blurry. I looked down, and saw a fresh puddle of blood at my feet, fuzzy and indistinct. It looked a very bright red. My knees started to give out, and I could hear Canderous saying, "Wildcat?" in a tone of concern, then a panicked "JENNET!" coming from far, far, away. Dimly, I thought something must be really wrong if he was using my name like that out loud. My vision was going gray and there was a roaring sound in my ears, and the last thing I heard was Canderous bellowing for help.

I came to in Canderous's lap, weak and shaky but alive. He was warm, and I was so cold. I mumbled, "What happened?"

"You almost died, you foolish woman!" Canderous wasn't yelling, exactly, but he sounded angry. I focused with difficulty on his face; it was pale and worried under the anger. Then I realized he wasn't mad; he was scared. I smiled faintly.

"I must be okay," I muttered. "You're yelling at me." I wanted to touch his face, but my arm wouldn't move. I tried to use my healing, but I couldn't feel it. The effort made me groan. Canderous glared at me. I felt him in my head, but was too tired to answer, or make sense of it. I did, however, feel a tiny trickle of warmth seeping into my body. Canderous couldn't heal me, but he seemed to be trying to lend me the strength of his own life force.

Ladria's concerned voice floated above me. "You'll be okay, I think. According to Canderous, you threw _all_ your healing at him when he got his throat cut. You need some time before it builds up again. Bao Dur got to you in time, and he's given you as much healing as is safe at the moment. But you lost a lot of blood; someone put a rather large hole in your side. I'd prefer to get you to a medbay, but I don't want to move you yet. You need to sit still for a while before we can heal you again."

"I can do that," I whispered. Then I remembered something. "Atton okay?"

"I'm fine, gorgeous." I heard him say somewhere to the left of me. "Just got hit on the head, nothing serious."

"No damage done, then," I joked feebly. He chuckled.

"What Jennet really needs is a kolto tank," Visas said worriedly.

Mira spoke up. "They're in short supply here. Nearest decent sized hospital is on the other side of the planet. This side is too poor to support one. There's only a few clinics scattered around over here. I could scout and see if any of them have a tank, though."

"Please don't," I murmured. I hate kolto tanks, and I really don't like hospitals or clinics. Luckily, I almost never need them. Call it my very own phobia.

Ladria looked at Mira, then back at me, and at Canderous, who looked ready to go out and find the nearest clinic with a tank and dump me in, willing or no.

"Look," I said as reasonably as I could. "By the time Mira locates one, and you get me there, you all could heal me, right?"

"Not by much. It's going to take a lot more time than usual," Ladria said. "If you really don't want one, we won't insist. We can't move you for a bit in any case. But promise you'll rest for now, okay?"

At my nod, she looked around at the rest of the worried faces and said, "Well, since we can't leave yet, let's make use of the time and search the room. Bao Dur, please seal the door."

I lay in Canderous's arms as everyone else frisked the bodies, taking anything of use. There wasn't enough left of the Hutt to bother trying to find anything worthwhile, but Bao Dur searched his lounger and found a cache of credits stored in it. There was enough to cover what our payoff was supposed to have been, and then some. He made the suggestion that we give the bulk of it to the leader of the refugees. Everyone thought that was a good idea. Bao Dur, Ladria, Atton, and Mira volunteered to go down and present it to them later.

It was a good forty minutes before Ladria allowed me to take more healing. Someone had applied kolto packs to my side when I had been out, and Canderous had removed the used packs and applied another while the others were busy. I was feeling less fuzzy, but I was still very weak, and my healing wasn't rebuilding yet. I was feeling nauseous with the smell of blood around me, especially the yellow gore so liberally spattered everywhere. I started to retch, and Canderous thoughtfully held my hair back, not allowing me to move any more than necessary. Finally, Ladria gave me a slow trickle of healing, increasing it a tiny bit as I grew a little stronger. She said she didn't dare heal me the usual way; I'd lost so much blood that too much at once could cause me to go into shock.

There was a locker room of sorts off the fighting area, with showers. I asked Canderous to take me there; I had to get the blood off me. I was able to stand, sort of, with Canderous's help and the warm spray rinsed me off, armor and all. Everyone else followed the example. Hutt blood sticks like mud, it seems. I wanted like crazy to strip down and take a long, hot shower and scrub every inch of my body with a something rough and soapy, do it again, then stand there until the water ran cold. When the worst of the gore was gone, Canderous picked me up and we got out of there. Bao Dur took the precaution of blowing the computer terminals and sealing the door as we left.

We were all wet, but as free of sticky Hutt blood as could be managed. From my perch in Canderous's arms, I asked Ladria and asked if this was going to cause a problem with the Exchange now. She looked thoughtful at the question.

"I suppose we won't know until I talk to Go-To, and then I suspect he'll just tell me what he wants to. But if it does, we'll deal with it then. If we fail our mission, I don't suppose it will matter much anyway."

"Good point. Well, I didn't mean to cause trouble. I'm sorry," my voice was small.

Ladria looked at me, and touched my arm warmly. "There's nothing to apologize for. We all agreed to the plan, even thought it was a good idea. We should be thanking you for coming along and helping us when we leave."

I felt better. "Do you think it's safe to stay on Nar Shadaa until then?" I asked generally. Everyone seemed to agree that it was.

Canderous had been silent, and as we were turning toward the docks announced abruptly that he and I would be staying planet side until we left for the mission. He gave Ladria the name of the hotel we'd be at, and assured her we both had comlinks. I protested that I didn't have anything with me but what I had on, not even a toothbrush or a change of clothes.

_Who says you'll need clothes? _Canderous's voice purred in my head, but I could tell that he just wanted to get a reaction. It was nice to know I could process his communication again.

Ladria at first tried to get us to come back to the ship, until I recovered my strength. Canderous replied that he'd like to get me into a real bed and promised I'd get plenty of rest. Capitulating, Ladria insisted on coming with us, to help heal me, and Atton volunteered to go too, to escort her back. Canderous scowled at that but I could tell he was more worried than he wanted to admit and was grateful for the offer. Truthfully, I was too tired to care; I just wanted to get clean and sleep.

"Perhaps I could be of assistance as well?" asked Visas in her calm, sweet voice. She had not said much during any of the aftermath, but had stayed as close to me as possible when she wasn't needed elsewhere. I was touched by her concern, and smiled at her warmly.

"You know," Bao Dur said thoughtfully, "a real bed does sound nice. The droids can take care of the ship. How about we get rooms for everyone? We can help Jennet there as easily as on board."

"Sounds great to me," chimed in Mira. "We did just raid a Hutt after all, we can afford it." She grinned in satisfaction. Disciple nodded too.

It was decided that Mira, Disciple, and Bao Dur would go to the Ebon Hawk and pack up clothes and any necessities needed for everyone, while Ladria, Atton, and Visas accompanied me and Canderous to the hotel and get us checked in. Without further ado, we all trooped off in our separate directions. I dozed off as we headed toward the hotel.


	14. Chapter 14

**Canderous**

The hotel was one I had heard of but not stayed at before. I'd been on Nar Shadaa many times, mostly on business for various people I'd worked for. It was a nice place, far more upscale than I usually chose. Jennet had given me a scare, I could admit that to myself – and her, she could hardly be unaware of it - and I wanted her to be comfortable. Once she was recovered I wanted her to have some good memories to take with us, and for the first time I wanted to pamper a woman.

The lobby was large, with several little shops off it. Ladria checked us all in. The receptionist looked startled at our scruffy group, and the sleeping woman in my arms, but was too polite to say anything. She was extremely respectful of Ladria, who looks like a queen even when she's rumpled and damp and none too clean. After we collected passkeys, I carried Jennet to the lift. She was stirring, and smiled up at me sleepily. I smiled back, trying not to show her how worried I was. She was still very pale, and her face looked drawn. Atton commed the others on the way to our room, letting them know that they could pick up their room assignments and passkeys at the front desk, and where we would be.

Ladria and Atton stopped at their rooms to shower and clean their clothing, promising meet us in ours soon. I managed the door and stepped in. It was large, with a huge bed, a couple of built in dressers, a small kitchen, a computer terminal, and several chairs, couches, and tables scattered around. I set Jennet carefully on the bed, and she immediately tried to strip off her armor, fumbling with the straps. I stopped her and did it myself, with her insisting that I clean everything and check over our weapons. I approve of a woman who has her priorities straight, but told her firmly that I would later; she needed to get comfortable first.

I couldn't help but admire her in the clothes that Mira had chosen for her. Under other circumstances, it would be all I could do not to rip them off and have my way with her. The top barely covered her breasts and the pants began at the hipbones. She felt my appreciation, and grinned. Our nonverbal communication had become so natural that I was starting to wonder if we ever would have to talk out loud again.

_Is there anyone else out there that wants to kill you? _She asked silently.

_Probably, _I answered honestly. _Not here, though._

The events of the last few of hours had shaken her badly. Her thoughts were fainter than usual, but I picked up that her own situation was less of a concern to her than what had almost happened to me. I understood how she felt; if it had been her that had gotten her throat cut I'd have gone crazy. Which, come to that, was exactly what she had done. As it was, I had nearly gone berserk when the thugs had dislocated her limbs. Only her constant presence in my mind and the fear of the Hutt allowing her to be torn apart had kept me still. More the latter than the former; she had been telling me to stay, that she could heal it, don't provoke them into killing her. She had made sense, but it was one of the hardest things I had ever done, and the only reason I hadn't tried was the fear that I wouldn't get to her before they killed her. I didn't want to feel that helpless ever again. I had a feeling that now that I had her, it was going to be something I was going to have to get used to. She wasn't my mate because she _needed_ me to protect her; she was my mate because she was my equal. Not that I wasn't going to try, I told myself.

_Well I'm going to try too,_ came her soft answer. _We'll protect each other, isn't that what this is all about?_

_It is,_ I answered back, rather shortly. I heard her faint laughter, and smiled reluctantly.

_Don't ever do that again, Wildcat. I'm not worth it._

_You are to me._

I might have known she wouldn't promise anything.

"I'm filthy," she complained.

"I can take care of that," I said, and set about doing so.

I stripped us down, disposed of our dirty clothes in the laundry recycle and carried her to the 'fresher, Jennet protesting she could walk. I knew better and didn't bother to answer. The 'fresher was huge, with a large real tub separate from the enormous shower. There were six heads in the shower, two on each side, which seemed excessive to me. There was soap and shampoo and other unidentifiable things in a basket by the sink. I set her down briefly, grabbed some of these, turned on all the shower heads, and got it as hot as she could stand. Then I picked her up and set her on a little bench that was in there. I grabbed the soap and carefully scrubbed her down, watching the olive tone, which had apparently been applied literally everywhere, wash away from her body and her skin returned to its natural ivory. Although right now it was more a pasty white, and I worried all over again. She insisted on having her hair washed twice, and I obliged, holding her upright to rinse off. She managed to wash her face herself. I was glad of that; I wasn't sure I knew how. I sat her down again, and quickly washed myself.

I turned off the water, scooped her up, and grabbed a couple of towels as we got out of the shower. I dried her off, then me. She asked for a towel and tried to rub her hair. I took it, toweled her hair dry, and did the same for me. Her hair was blonde again, curls damply framing her exhausted face. She had used up pretty much what strenghth she'd gained, and I silently berated myself for tiring her with the shower. I noted that she still needed to remove the eye implant. I liked the blue, but much preferred her natural brown. I picked her up again and carried her to the bed.

I shrugged the bedclothes aside and lay her down, then tucked the covers over her and propped a couple of pillows under her head. She started scowling.

"I'm feeling much better, you know."

"Maybe, but you'll stay put until Ladria says you're okay. She'll be here in a minute." I wasn't fooled; I could feel how faint her life force was. I was still giving her some of my own strength, but slowly, for fear of shock.

I went back to the 'fresher and retrieved my now clean clothes. I considered helping Jennet dress, but discarded the notion. If she had clothes, she might try to move. As it was, I knew she'd stay in the bed if we had company.

I had a sudden thought. I still had the regeneration implant I'd installed in me. It was a good one, but I wasn't sure it would be safe to put it in her. I said as much to Jennet.

"I don't know what they'd do to me, I've never used one," she said thoughtfully.

"Better to wait then, and let the others help," I decided. She made a tired sound I took as agreement.

Atton, Ladria, and Visas arrived, and began the slow process of healing Jennet. Each of them took about an hour, sitting on the bed and holding her hand as the Force healing trickled into her. I cleaned armor and weapons and tried like hell not to resent that I couldn't help.

When Atton took her hand, I sat on the bed and took her other hand. I knew I had nothing to worry about, but I still didn't especially like him holding my woman's hand when she was naked, covers or not. Hell, I didn't like him touching her when she was in full armor, and I hadn't forgotten that kiss he'd given her, even knowing it was done to goad me. I'd appreciated her reaction, though, and hoped he remembered how hard she can hit when riled. But I knew he was helping her, and tried not to glower too much.

Atton had looked up when I sat down, but instead of the smirk I expected on his face, he was grave and businesslike. He nodded reassuringly at me, and resumed looking intently at Jennet, as if willing her to get better. He looked like a big brother worrying over his beloved little sister and with a small shock I realized that's almost exactly how he felt. I nodded back, hoping he realized I appreciated his help.

Halfway through Atton's shift, the rest of the crew arrived. They had cleaned up while they were shipboard, I noticed. Mira set two bags down on a chair. Jennet had fallen asleep, but looked much better, not so pale.

"How is she?" Mira asked, her voice quiet. I honestly liked Mira; she was tough and resourceful, and a good fighter. She didn't seem to take her new Jedi status as a reason to change her personality, which could rival mine in abrasiveness if she chose.

"Better," I answered. She nodded soberly. I was surprised at how concerned she was. I knew she liked Jennet, but hadn't thought Mira was the type to get attached.

"I wish I could help, but I'm not at the point I can heal yet," she said regretfully.

"Don't worry about it. It was a big help to bring our things," I pointed out. "And you'll get there." Define irony: me, cheering up a jetti about her lack of ability. I almost smiled at the thought.

Mira shrugged and said "Yeah, you're right. I'm glad Jennet will be okay though. I've gotten used to her. Hard to believe she's only been with us a little more than a day."

"I know the feeling," I raised an eyebrow ironically.

"Yeah, I bet you do," Mira grinned.

All the jetti that had the ability took a turn at Jennet's side. Eventually, Visas and Ladria said that everything had been done that could be, and all that Jennet needed now was sleep. She looked almost like her old self now. She wasn't deathly pale anymore, and the sunken look had gone. She was deeply asleep, and breathing well. I could feel the healing taking place inside her, and relief washed over me. She would be okay now, I knew.

I cleared my throat. It wasn't easy for me to acknowledge kindness, even from people I considered friends. And I did think of them all that way, even Atton and Disciple. I said sincerely, if gruffly, "Thank you, everyone. I…" I stopped. It was one thing to feel something, another to say it out loud. I have never been good at that sort of thing. I settled for, "Just…thanks."

Everyone rose to go to their own rooms. To my surprise, Ladria hugged me when she left. I hugged back, stiff and awkward. "I'm just two doors down if you need me, and Visas is next door to you. We'll come by tomorrow and check on her. I expect her healing will build back up in the night. Don't be worried if she sleeps very deeply, and can't be woken easily. She'll probably sleep at least ten hours, if not more."

I nodded, appreciating the encouragement. I made sure the door was secure behind them, stripped down, and crawled into bed with my wildcat. She turned on her side and moved closer when I touched her, her back to me. I put my arm around her and held her close.

My thoughts were troubled and churning around my head. I had almost lost something that only yesterday I didn't know existed, or could have comprehended then was important. Was this love, her kind of love? I thought it must be; the thought of her gone made me insane. I didn't know why I had found her, or why she seemed to feel the same for me. I did know I didn't deserve it.

I had loved Gerda, I was sure of that, in the way of my people. I knew without a doubt I had loved my children. I often wondered what they would be like now, if they had lived, especially Etta, my daughter. She had been so like her mother; strong and capable and brave. My sons would be men now, or close to it, Cardus probably married. I missed them, and wished they had lived, even if I had not survived the war.

But finding Jennet was like finding a part of me that I didn't know existed until she was there to make me whole. I thought about my family, dead these many years, and something inside me told me they approved. I thought of Gerda, and I hoped that this time, I could find a way to say how I felt.

It was a long time before I could sleep.


	15. Chapter 15

Thanks everyone for the reviews! Please keep them coming; I love feedback. Hope you enjoy! - LJ

* * *

**Jennet**

I slept twelve hours, and didn't dream at all. When I woke, I was disoriented and tired, with a hollow feeling that I realized after a moment was hunger. I was absolutely famished. The disorientation faded and I recalled where I was, and felt Canderous nearby. Before opening my eyes and trying to move, I took stock, and found my healing was back. I could tell though that it was as I had described it to Disciple the other day; it was working, but very slowly, and I knew I wouldn't be able to use it on anyone else until I got some fuel and probably more sleep. But I was whole, and healed, and knew that it would take very little to get me back to my normal self now.

_Good, you're awake. How do you feel?_

I opened my eyes and saw Canderous sitting on a chair near the bed, watching me. The voice in my head was full of concern, but I knew he had already assessed my condition. I smiled.

_Hungry, _I answered. _Starved, in fact. Feed me?_

"I ordered breakfast a few minutes ago," Canderous said aloud. "I felt you start to wake up, and figured you'd need food."

"A man after my own heart," I said.

"Yeah, well, don't get too excited. Ladria told me that you should take it slow, make sure you can keep it down. Oatmeal to start with, and if it doesn't make you sick, we'll try something more solid."

"I hate oatmeal," I complained.

"Tough."

I scowled; he remained implacable.

"Good thing you're not a doctor, your beside manner sucks," I sniped.

He smiled. "Thanks," he said sincerely. "I know you're feeling better if you're bitching at me."

"I want a shower, and to get dressed." I started to sit up, and my head swam.

Canderous was beside me in an instant, firmly pressing me back down with a big hand on my shoulder. "You'll stay in bed until you've eaten. Then you'll try to stand." He kissed me to soften the order. He smelled like soap and musk and man. I sniffed appreciatively, and kissed him back.

"Tyrant," I said without heat.

He smiled again, and went to collect breakfast from the kitchen food processor.

I sat up carefully, and slowly ate a bowl of oatmeal, grimacing. It was heavily sweetened, which helped, but it still tasted like sugared paste to me. It stayed down, and good deal of my equilibrium was restored. Canderous wasn't eating and I asked why.

"I ate an hour ago. I can have real food, no point in flaunting it." He grinned. I scowled again.

"Can I have some eggs?" I wheedled.

"Tell you what – eat another bowl of oatmeal, and we'll see."

I did, and felt almost normal, if still tired. Canderous got me the promised eggs and some toast to go with it. I drank some juice too, several glasses, and looked around for more food. Grinning happily, he ordered some more.

_If I had any doubts about your recovery, watching you eat relieves my mind._

I just smiled, and dug in, this time with my old relish. Every bite was giving me strength, and by the time I finished, I felt great. When Canderous finally allowed me out of bed, I felt only a little light-headed.

I insisted on a shower, and considered asking him to join me but on reflection realized I wasn't quite up to what that would lead to. He caught the thought, and said mildly that he'd showered already; there would be time enough for fun when I was ready. So I got clean and dressed and felt worlds better.

"So what are we going to do today?" I asked.

"My thought is to stay in our room, maybe watch some holovids. You really need to sleep some more, or at least rest. Ladria said you shouldn't do much today, but you should be just fine tomorrow."

"You two have been getting chummy while I've been out," I said crankily. It was stupid, I knew, he didn't remotely feel anything but friendship toward her, nor her to him. But I was a teeny bit jealous that he was suddenly talking about her like her word was gospel.

He looked at me, knowing exactly what was in my head, and said gravely, "She's very concerned, and has grown extremely fond of you. Her advice and help has been invaluable, and she's been instrumental in keeping me sane while I was out of my head with worry. But thanks for the jealousy, it's flattering."

I was ashamed, and mumbled, "I'm sorry. I know I'm being stupid. I'm grateful she looked out for you as well as helped me."

"Don't worry about it. I don't like it at all when Atton flirts with you, and I know perfectly well he doesn't mean anything by it. Doesn't stop me from wanting to hit him."

"I'm impressed with your restraint," I said, absolutely sincerely.

"Yeah, well, let's just hope he doesn't push me too hard," he grumbled.

"Is this going to be a problem? I'm a bit of a flirt myself, you know, and while I don't want to hurt you, I don't like the idea of changing the way I am to accommodate your, er, protective instincts." I was honestly curious. I am willing to compromise, but didn't like it if he expected me to turn into a meek little woman that didn't speak to other men without his permission.

He considered the question seriously, and answered slowly, "I can't promise I won't overreact from time to time. But I do trust you; you don't have a disloyal bone in your body. I love you the way you are; I don't want you to change anything. If you can see when I'm getting…protective," he raised an eyebrow at me, "and maybe show me it's not necessary…" _and back the hell off, stop flirting back, and let me cool down…_

I caught the unspoken part loud and clear, and with some difficulty didn't laugh.

"…then I guess it won't be a problem." He concluded.

Then something he'd said hit me like a swoop bike crashing into a bulkhead.

"Say that again," I said.

"I guess it won't be a problem," he answered, smiling, knowing perfectly well what I'd meant.

"Before that."

"If you can see when I'm getting protective…" he said obediently, his smile getting wider.

I went over to him, put my arms around him, and stood on tiptoe. He met me halfway, and everything he felt was in his kiss. He looked down at me, his eyes bright.

"I love you the way you are." He said gruffly.

"Shorten that," I said.

"You're not going to make this easy for me, are you?"

"Never," I answered, smiling.

He paused a moment, and I heard him say it in my head just before he said it out loud.

"I love you," he said, hoarsely, his blue eyes not leaving mine.

"I love you too." I said, and kissed him.

My heart was full to bursting, and I wanted to cry, and sing, and dance, and run down the hall and shout it to everyone. I settled for kissing him breathless, and holding him as close as I could with our clothes still on. I discovered he was ever so slightly trembling, and it struck me that this was harder for him than battle, or even standing by, helpless, while other people healed me. I was awed by his courage and made sure he knew it, wordlessly. The trembling stopped after a moment.

"That wasn't as hard as I thought it would be," he said finally.

I smiled. "So say it once a day. You'll get used to it."

"I can probably manage that," he said seriously.

I scanned his thoughts and face and realized he wasn't being sarcastic, or bantering, it was a straightforward comment. He was setting up a strategy to accomplish several things at once: making me happy by telling me out loud regularly he loved me; desensitizing himself to his knee-jerk reaction to saying it; and – this one was a surprise - honoring me _and_ Gerda by finding the courage to do so. It was so typically Canderous I wanted to laugh, but held it back in both throat and mind. It was the closest I would ever see him as earnest, I knew. It touched me deeply that he was willing to try so hard to make me happy.

Of course, that's when everyone and their brother arrived. The whole crew traipsed into our room when Canderous, with a mild oaf and not a little relief, opened the door. There was a buzzing of talk, exclaiming over my recovery so far, and well wishes all around. I was almost bowled over by the sincere concern and relief that was directed at me. They all had become very dear to me and I got a little teary knowing they felt the same. Mira even hugged me, and grumbled something about scaring her. I apologized, and she just grinned.

"Yeah, well, I can't count how many times I've been badly hurt in a fight. Don't worry about it."

Ladria and Visas checked me over carefully and pronounced me healed.

"Don't think this means you're completely well. I expect you to rest today, but tomorrow you should be just fine," Ladria admonished.

"Yes, Ma'am," I said meekly. She laughed. I liked it, and I suspected she didn't laugh often enough. I saw Atton turn toward the sound and smile.

"We'll go now, and let you rest. Take good care of her," she said to Canderous, and he grimaced.

"I'll try. She's pretty stubborn." But his eyes on me were warm. I was astonished. He was _bantering?_

"You've done an excellent job so far. I expect no less from my crew," she said, a hint of teasing in her voice.

"Aye, Captain," Canderous said gravely.

"Since I have everyone present…we leave the day after tomorrow. Report back to the Ebon Hawk then, everyone, 0700. We'll take off as soon as we're ready."

Everyone sobered at that, but looked unsurprised. There were nods, and murmurs of agreement.

"I don't want anyone to go back unless it's personal until then," she said sternly. "We're ready as we'll ever be. Provisions are on board, weapons and armor are ready, kolto packs prepared. I expect you all to do nothing but enjoy some time to yourselves for the next two days. If I'm needed, I've available by comlink. But make sure it's important, not just fretting. You all deserve a break, and I want you rested and ready to go. See you then," she finished, and gathering up the crew, left. The mood had lightened, and cheerful chattering followed them out the door. I caught a snatch of conversation about going to the refugees, and was glad.

"You know," Canderous said thoughtfully after everyone was gone, "I really think - no, I _know_ we're going to succeed in this mission."

"I'm glad to hear it, but what makes you so sure?"

"I've found you, for one."

I was pleased at that, but didn't comprehend what I had to do with his sudden optimism, and said so.

"I've said that I've felt the Force was at work," he said slowly, trying to articulate his thoughts.

There are so many wrong things about a Mandalorian talking about faith in the Force. But from Canderous, it wasn't. Mostly.

"Yeah, I know. I can't argue that," I said. Then his train of thought caught up to me. "You think that as the Mandalore, you're supposed to have a mate, and now that you do, it's a sign you'll succeed in your personal ambition to rebuild your culture? And that won't – can't - happen until we're done here?"

"Something like that, yeah."

I thought about it. I was born of two Jedi, trained by them, and have never _not_ believed in the Force. I get rebellious from time to time, and am prone to trying to buck destiny. It was one reason I was never sorry my parents didn't allow me to become one. I _know_ I'm stubborn and willful, and I like it that way.

_Wildcat, stubborn doesn't even begin to cover it._

_Says the Mandalorian,_ I shot back.

_That's how I know._

But…what he said made sense, and if the Force guided us to each other, it had a reason. I had to believe that it wasn't for our mission to fail. And if it succeeded, what then? Well, it's like Canderous said: We'd all go on to fulfill our personal destinies.

Then again, maybe Canderous _wasn't_ going to rebuild his people's culture. Maybe he's supposed to build something even better, based on that culture.

_That had crossed my mind too._

I went over to kiss him. "Hope is always a good thing to have."

His eyes were intense as he looked down into my face. "And it always crops up where you least expect it."


	16. Chapter 16

**Canderous**

While Jennet took a nap, I tuned in to her so I could keep watch without having to be in the room, and slipped out and went down to Atton's. I pressed the comm on the door, but no answer. I remembered then that he was one of the ones that was going to head to the refugee section with Ladria. I decided it was best; if he laughed at me about what I was doing, I'd probably kill him. Not good for crew morale, and Jennet wouldn't approve.

Bao Dur had gone with them, and Mira. That left Visas and Disciple. I was sure I couldn't stand to ask Disciple or spend more than ten minutes in his company without a buffer. Not that I hated him, I just have no frame of reference at all to talk with him, and he's so naïve it sets my teeth on edge. Plus, I doubted he'd have a clue about what I was after.

Visas, now…she was a wise woman, and I'd seen that she seemed protective of Jennet, which I approved of. We have little in common, but she didn't treat me like a barbarian, which is how Disciple tended to. He got on my nerves with his condensation when I asked him to explain some esoteric point he was given to spouting on about. I'd stopped asking the second time he eyed me like an animal let loose from its cage, and had taken to avoiding being around him when possible. Jennet seemed to like him all right, but I had heard some stray thoughts of hers and knew she was almost as much at a loss with him as I was, but found his antics amusing and endearing rather than irritating.

Visas was female, and would likely know what sorts of things other females like. I would actually rather ask Mira; she speaks my language. The only reason I had been willing to swallow my pride and talk to Atton is because I knew he was very good with women, and could give me some direction without getting sweet about it, like a woman would. That he would probably never let me forget it I was willing to put up with; I was reasonably certain he wouldn't let on to Jennet about it. He can be a fool, and loves to tease people, but I've noticed he's never deliberately cruel, and can keep things to himself.

But Atton wasn't here, and I thought Visas likely was. So I went over to her room, commed the door, and soon she was letting me in, bowing graciously with a genuine smile on her face. I had gotten used to the veil and her blindness; I hardly noticed it now, and I knew she could see clearer than most people that had the use of their eyes.

"What can I help you with?" she asked in her low voice. It always makes me uneasy how jetti can sense intent and emotions. But she made it seem I was doing _her_ a favor by asking, so I shrugged the feeling off.

"I want to pick out something special for Jennet, and I don't know where to start," I said as straightforwardly as possible. I was internally writhing; I hated asking for favors, and hated worse to appear to anyone to be soft. But Jennet was worth a little discomfort. I was suddenly glad I hadn't found Atton.

Visas didn't smile; she seemed to know that would make things worse for me. She simply said gravely, "That's a thoughtful and lovely thing to do. How can I help?"

"Well," I said awkwardly, "She has armor and weapons now, and I know those are things that she values highly. She was very happy when I gave them to her. But I want to find something less…practical."

I had already planned on finding her a wedding ring, when I got around to asking her formally to marry me. I planned on doing that once the mission was over, and our future less in question. That she might not say yes never crossed my mind. Once I acknowledged she was my mate, to my mind we already were married; the rest was just formalities. Under my customs, however, we wouldn't be able to legally wed until we'd passed our tests, and would have to in any case have the ceremony with my people as witness. Mandalorians don't wear rings, but Telans and Ondorians do, and I thought she'd like that. I might even consent to wear one myself, if it seemed important to her. I didn't think I would have any trouble picking a ring out. But I wanted something else, something to show her how important she was, and special. I had never before had that sort of impulse; with Gerda I'd simply pick out a nice thing from war booty and give it to her when I got home. She always was appreciative and was as practical as me about frivolities. I knew Jennet wasn't the sort to actively seek out trinkets, but she did seem like she'd appreciate the occasional keepsake.

"I see," Visas said thoughtfully. "The best way to approach something like this is understand what is important to Jennet." She cocked her head at me, inviting me to comment.

I swallowed mentally the comment that came to mind – did she think I was a total idiot? But I had asked for help; and perhaps in this sort of thing I was, a bit. So I gave her comment serious thought, and ran through Jennet's priorities. She valued honor, and honesty, and courage. None of these seemed to help. She liked a well-made weapon, or armor, combat, and learning. Not just battle tactics, either – she soaked up knowledge of all sorts, I'd noticed. She also highly valued friendship and loyalty. She had mentioned she was fond of good whiskey.

"All I can think of are things that anyone could get for her," I said grumpily.

Visas smiled. It was warm, and not a bit condescending. "You're thinking of things. What does Jennet treasure the most?"

I just looked at her, not following.

"You, I think." Visas said quietly.

"True." I said, without conceit. It was fact, just as what I treasured most was her. "But that doesn't help."

"I think it will, if you go down to the shop with that in mind. I'm certain you'll find something that meets your requirements there. Would you like me to go with you?" Her offer was sincere, and I almost took her up on it, had been planning to ask, in fact. But I thought about it, and decided I needed to do this by myself.

"Thanks, but no. I think I can handle it now. I appreciate your input," I said as sincerely as I could. I didn't want to offend her by showing her my frustration.

With a graceful nod and a smile, she showed me out.

_Well, that was a big help_, I thought irritably. Well, I hadn't wanted her to simply pick something out, just point me in the right direction. Maybe I should stick to weapons, I knew those. I sighed, annoyed, and went down to the lobby and the shop off it.

When I entered the store, it was crammed full of knickknacks and baubles, electronic greeting cards, art holos, and other miscellanea I couldn't identify. I felt as uncomfortable as a Bantha in a market square. I spotted a case full of jewelry and decided to start there. Jennet didn't wear any that I had seen, but her ears were pierced and I assumed she did from time to time, when it was available. I looked over the selection and something caught my eye. I pointed it out to the hovering sales clerk, and she placed it on a strip of black velvet, saying it was a fine piece they had only gotten in a few days ago, as part of an estate consignment.

It was a necklace with an oval pendant about the size of a credit disk. The chain was sturdy, not easily yanked off or prone to get snagged on armor, but not clunky. Inlaid on the oval was a flat polished crystal that glowed like opal fire in greens and purples and blues, with threads of orange, red, and gold running through it. It reminded me of her; beautiful and unusual, with a hint of fire. At my look of interest, the eager clerk showed me the catch on the side, and that it was a small container where one could store a holo or a lock of hair or a tiny treasure. She referred to the pendant as a locket. She pointed out a machine in the corner of the store that could produce a holo in any size needed. I looked closer at the inside of the locket. There was engraving on the left half, like a crest: two curving crossed swords, not unlike the Twi'lik spinning swords I'd given her, surmounted by the stylized snarling face of some sort of cat wearing a crown. It was perfect. The clerk urged me to go get my holo taken and offered to mount it in the pendant free of charge. I hate getting my image taken, but I thought about what Visas had said, and did it. I hoped I wasn't glowering, but thought even if I was, she probably would like it anyway.

The clerk inserted the holo, wrapped up the necklace in a tiny box, and I stowed it in my pocket after paying an insane amount. I didn't mind, but I couldn't comprehend why it cost so much. If she liked it though, it would be worth every credit.

I left the shop to make my way back to the lift that would take me to my floor. Ladria, Atton, Mira and Bao Dur were entering the lobby as I passed the reception desk. They waved, and made 'wait a minute' motions at me. They caught up to me, and we all trooped to the lift.

"How's Jennet?" Ladria asked.

"Sleeping. She ate like a Bantha at lunch, but got tired after."

Ladria nodded. "Doesn't surprise me. Her system sustained a terrible shock. When you're that drained, it takes a good day or two to recover, if you have healing or kolto on hand. Much longer, weeks, if not. If you survive the initial injury. She's bounced back a lot faster than most would." She patted my arm. "She's tough, she'll be fine."

"Yeah, she is. Thanks." I felt a slight stirring and said without thinking, "She's waking up."

"Better get back buddy or she'll get cranky," Atton smirked.

I gave him the smile that usually makes people back away quickly. "I'll do that."

Atton just grinned at me. I gave my usual glower back but gave him points for not backing down.

"How was the refugee camp?" I asked.

I didn't particularly care, but I was practicing being more sociable. I did feel for the people that the Exchange and Hutts had abused so badly, but my culture isn't one for pity. If you're not strong enough to survive, you die, or are enslaved or oppressed. A Mandalorian who is unlucky or stupid enough to be taken by a slaver will generally kill themselves, if possible in a way that takes out as many of the enemy as they can, if escape is impossible. We don't consider that giving up, and we will try escape first. But to live as a slave is the worst possible fate to us; death is preferable. We had, or did before we were decimated, kept slaves. Some call that hypocritical, we tend to call it practical. I was odd in that respect though, I didn't care to keep a slave, and neither had Gerda.

To be totally honest, it wasn't so much that I was kinder than most of my race, it was mostly because I didn't trust anyone that was in a situation not of their choosing. Slaves worked for you out of fear or oppression, and I wouldn't trust one to have me or my family's interests in mind. So I'd take a slave as part of my bounty, if I had to, and either free him with the offer of working for me for a time, or he could work off his price some other way. I never took a woman or child slave; the thought of it made me crazy. My attitude was one of my more eccentric things that amused my men. One of the first things I did as Mandalore was outlaw slavery. There was some fuss about it that settled down when I explained my reasoning. I didn't care what anyone thought, but I am no dictator, and my people are not easily led. Most came around to my way of thinking.

Mira spoke up. "It was great! They were thrilled about the credits, but the best part is with both the Hutts and Exchange out of action, they can move out of that stinkhole. Rather than distributing the credits among everyone, they decided to use it as a stake to set up a community. Everyone is pitching in that can. They have some real talented people in that group, and they're going to go into trade. When we left, they were starting a meeting about where they were going to set up shop."

"That's great," I said, and meant it. I liked it when people worked together.

The lift finally opened, and everyone scattered to their rooms. I let myself in, feeling Jennet awake and looking for me. Her face lit up when I entered the room, then she scowled and asked sharply, "Where have you been?"

"Miss me?" I asked. She was getting cranky, as Atton predicted. I took it as a good sign; she must be better. I hate to be cooped up for long myself, and recovering from injury is the worst.

"I just woke up, I haven't had time." She sounded irritated. Without comment, I ordered up some coffee from the food station. Doctoring it for her, I took it over and put it in her hand. I'd noticed she's grumpy when she first wakes up. Coffee helps.

She looked at the mug in her hand, then at me, and capitulated. "Thank you," she said, sounding warmer. She stood on tiptoe and kissed my cheek.

I pulled her closer, and kissed her better. She melted into me and I took back the coffee before she dropped it. She was definitely feeling better. As the kiss got more involved, I slowly walked us over to a table and set down the mug, then gave her my full attention.

Before things escalated to panting need, I pulled back and asked, "You sure you're okay for this?"

She smiled wickedly. "Well, it's either sex or a night of Pazzak or holovids. You choose," she purred, deliberately striking a seductive pose.

She had taken her pants off when she went down for her nap and was in a shirt and a pair of tiny bright pink and green panties. I groaned. I couldn't resist her. I hoped I could keep it slow enough not to cause her to relapse. I reached for her, and was gone. Her skin was warm and tasted like sweet cream. She was tugging at my shirt, and I shrugged out of it. When I pulled her back into my arms, she had already removed her own top and feel of her skin on my bare chest nearly drove me crazy.

_Let's take a shower._ She was seductive and throaty in my head. _Hot water. Soap. Lots of it, all over me. You, washing my back. And my front._

She took my hand, and led me to the 'fresher. She made a little show of stripping off the ridiculous scrap of cloth she was wearing, and I was out of the rest of my clothes in record time. We turned all six of the shower heads on, and came together in the middle of the spray, water massaging us from all directions. I was not a man for excess, but this sort of luxury I could get behind. Smiling with a catlike expression, Jennet soaped up her hands and proceeded to clean every inch of me with slow, erotic sweeps. She didn't miss anything, even insisting I raise each foot and scrub between every toe. She sat me down on the bench and washed my hair, digging her fingers into my scalp and making me groan. Her small, strong hands kneaded my shoulders and neck until her attentions combined with the hot water relaxed away the worry and fear of the last two days.

_Your turn, _I informed her. I have never been so relaxed yet turned on in my life.

I had been enjoying her attentions, and gave her the same. Lathering up my hands, I soaped every lovely bit of her, keeping my movements slow and teasing. She wiggled appreciatively against me, whimpering a little. I liked the sound, and experimented to get her to it some more. She obliged, and soon she was clean and pink from the hot water and my slow exploration of her body. She reached for me, and her kiss was hungry and hot and demanding. I kissed her deeply, holding her close and feeling her all around me, in my head, my soul, my heart. I managed to hold her off for a moment; I didn't want to take her here.

I turned off the water, scooped her up, and grabbed a couple of towels as we got out of the shower. I dried her off, and she dried me. Then she grabbed a towel and briskly rubbed her hair, shaking it free of excess water. I did the same, picked her up again and carried her to the bed.

I lay her down against the pillows and just looked at her, warm and glowing. Her skin was ivory dipped in cream. I bent and traced my tongue down her torso, using my teeth to nibble here and there. She squirmed, and her hands buried themselves in my hair. I continued this down one side, down her leg, then sucked on her toes. She squealed faintly. I repeated this up the other side, scraped stubble against her skin and she quivered. I went as slowly as I could, driving her to almost madness. Then she reached for me, and I let her draw me in, and bring me home.

We eventually crawled under the blankets and I gathered her close. She had her head on my chest and an arm flung over my middle, and her breath was warm against my skin. A thought floated through my head, _So that's what it's like to be gentle. I never knew I could be._

I probably wouldn't have let her hear that if I hadn't been so close to sleep. But she did, and a thought came back.

_I did._

It was a peculiar feeling, gentleness. I thought I could get used to it.

_Not all the time, please,_ her sleepy thought went through my mind, and I smiled as we slid into sleep.


	17. Chapter 17

**Jennet**

The next morning I woke with my healing ability completely restored, and feeling like my old self. I was crazy with the enforced rest, even if I unwillingly admitted I had needed it. I had energy now and couldn't stand the thought of another day trapped in the hotel.

Canderous was already up; I felt him in the 'fresher. I called a mental good morning and he replied with a deep grumbling sort of purr that made my toes tingle. I smiled, rolled over and spotted a small package on his pillow. It had a tag with my name on it; the handwriting was a small, untidy scrawl. I considered waiting for him to rejoin me but at that moment I heard the shower turn on, and realized he had done this on purpose; he wanted me to open it without him. Curious.

I love presents, I just never get them anymore; moving around constantly doesn't allow one to easily make or keep friends. Besides, I try to travel light and not collect a lot of stuff that I might have to leave behind. Or get blown up, I thought sourly, remembering the lovely blade I'd lost. I didn't think it was like Canderous to impulsively buy a gift that didn't have some practical use. I ripped the package open, after first carefully removing the tag and tucking it away in my bag. It was the first time I'd ever seen his handwriting, and the first gift he'd given me that required a label; call me sentimental. I opened the little box, removed a bit of gauzy stuff and gasped.

The necklace was extraordinary, beautiful and original and sturdy and delicate all at once. I could wear it all the time and be reasonably sure it wouldn't accidentally get broken; the clasp was strong, the chain thick enough not to snap easily. The chain itself was unusual, spiraled with multiple links intertwining like a delicate rope. The locket was simple and stunning. I flipped the catch, and saw a holo of Canderous mounted inside. He wasn't smiling, or scowling, but I'd bet he'd been uncomfortable when it was taken. It was such a Canderous look on his face I started to sniffle. Then I saw the cat and the swords and started to cry in earnest.

_You don't like it, Wildcat? _I heard his anxious voice in my head.

_I love it, _I sobbed back. _It's beautiful._

_But you're crying…_His mental voice was uncertain and, being Canderous, a bit irritated.

_I'm HAPPY, you idiot!_ I wailed back.

_If you say so, _he answered dubiously.

I fastened the gorgeous thing around my neck and went into the 'fresher, slipping into the shower with him. I grabbed his face with both hands and showed him just how happy I was. He relaxed, and kissed me back ferociously. Pulling back a little, he touched the locket.

"It looks just right there."

"It's beautiful. Thank you, love." I kissed him again.

It took a while to get out of the shower.

We spent the day walking around Nar Shadaa, talking about everything and nothing. He was teaching me to speak Mandalorian and I was picking it up quick enough to bemuse both of us. I'm not particularly gifted at languages. I can understand most common Republic ones to get by, and Force ability helps a lot with understanding, if not actual translation. I'd grown up speaking my parents' home dialects, of course. But being able to tune in to your instructor's very thoughts was an invaluable asset in learning an unfamiliar tongue. I had picked up some when I'd spent time with a couple of Mandalorian mercenaries out of Tatooine a few years back, and that helped too.

"How did that happen, anyway?" Canderous asked curiously.

"I had gone to Tatooine to check out the desert hunting; I was tired of bounties and not getting anything good anyway. I got my license, but it was too late in the day to bother going out, so I hit the cantina to wind down before hitting the sack. A brawl broke out – big surprise," I grinned, and Canderous snorted. "I was going to just cut out of there; it was no problem of mine. But I was sitting in a far corner where I could see most of the room, and got trapped there. A couple of drunks started trying to be gallant and protect me. I appreciated it, told them so, but next thing I knew they were unconscious, and a couple of slimy characters were trying to grab me. By the time the dust settled, me and two mercs were the only ones left standing; even the bartender was out cold. We got the hell out of there, and they were impressed by my fighting, started asking questions, and if I could teach them."

Canderous made a derisive sound in his throat. "Sure, and that's all they wanted?" He lowered his brows, glowering.

I elbowed him lightly. "I didn't even know you then, love. And no, of course not. I'm not stupid…I can tell when a man is thinking of opportunity. So I let them try, and kicked their asses. They were very respectful after that."

"I'll bet," Canderous snorted.

"I was surprised at how well we got along, once the boundaries were established. They had heard of a good job, and asked me along. They didn't have a ship, I did, so we took that job together. Spent six months as a team. They taught me a lot about Mandalorian combat, and I showed them a few moves. We got along very well."

"Did you sleep with them?"

"No." I said, and glared at him.

"Good," he growled. Then he paused. "Why not?"

"What is this about, really?" He was blocking me, and I was getting irritated. He knew I wasn't a virgin, and he certainly wasn't. I knew he was the jealous type, but it was unreasonable to feel that way about relationships I'd had before I met him.

His face was the blankest I'd seen it. He paused to collect his thoughts. "I hate the thought of anyone touching you but me, for one. I know whatever you did in the past is just that – the past. But I hate it all the same."

"And for two?"

"Huh?"

"You said 'for one'; that implies there's at least a 'two', possibly more."

"Well…" he actually looked uncomfortable. "Mandalorian politics."

"Excuse me?"

"If you traveled with Mandalorians, and they ever show up on Dxun…things might be…assumed." He was still blank-faced, but a hint of agitation was spilling through.

I stopped walking, and turned to face him, stone-faced. "You're not upset if I had slept with them so much as it might cause trouble for you as Mandalore?" I said carefully.

"No. I'd actually be more upset about you having slept with them. But like I said - it was past, and I'm not a total jerk; I'd get over it."

I unraveled this hypothetical statement and concluded that he simply was possessive enough not to be thrilled with any past relationship of mine. If I was honest, I knew that already. I wasn't in the mood to be honest, or fair. I was starting to be extremely pissed.

_He certainly isn't being fair, _I thought angrily.

"So," I said, again very carefully, "Since I didn't, you're not upset with me over that, but _are_ upset with me because people will assume I slept with them, and that would, what, make the Mandalore appear weak? Even though this happened years before I met you?"

"I'm not upset with you."

"You're doing a damn fine job of appearing so," I snapped.

"You've summed up the situation, yes. But I trust you; you said you didn't, so I have no problem. My people wouldn't be so reasonable."

"REASONABLE?!" I shouted, outraged.

He looked honestly startled at my outburst. It would have been funny if I wasn't incredibly pissed off. Then I saw him start to get mad. I didn't care; I'd kicked his ass once, I could do it again.

"I'm trying to explain my culture. You're the one not trying to understand." He was still calm, but his face was starting to flush.

"You expect me to understand why I'm at fault for something I didn't do, years before I met you?" My voice had risen to a bellow.

"I expect you to understand my position as leader, and respect it," he ground out.

"You think I don't?" I snarled.

"I think you don't know enough about Mandalorians to grasp how damaging this could be to us." His voice was starting to rise too.

"If I'm going to be tried and convicted for something that didn't happen and I didn't want it to, then you're damn right I don't grasp the concept!"

"As the Mandalore's wife, you need to!" Canderous shouted.

"WIFE?" I yelped, thrown.

"You're my wife, I won't have you talked about like some cantina whore!" Canderous had balled his hands into fists and was nose to nose with me, snarling into my face.

"WHORE?!" This was too much; I completely lost it. I punched him hard enough across the face to rock his head back.

As he resumed his angry stance, I grabbed the front of his shirt, yanked his face down said in a low, fierce, deadly voice: "For your information, _Mandalore_, I have had only five lovers in twenty-five years, including _you_. I was eighteen the first time. That averages less than one a year. As to why I _didn't_ sleep with your kin - I was not about to sleep with one partner, let alone two, and I'm not into threesomes. I didn't like either of them well enough even if I _didn't_ have scruples. I slept with my sword and blaster by my side for four months, just in case your buddies got fresh. I'll give them points that neither of them ever tried. If that offends your precious sense of honor, then you can go to hell. If that makes me a whore to you or any of your kin, you can take this wife thing and shove it up your ass. Consider it a divorce."

I shoved him back, hard, and spun sharply to leave. He grabbed my arm to stop me.

"Jennet," he started, his voice low.

"Let go of me, or I'll make you." I was already reaching for my sword.

"No."

I stomped on his foot, elbowed him in the gut, and yanked my arm free as he loosened his grip. Quick as thought, I drew my weapon and whipped around, my sword to his throat.

"The _whore_ is leaving."

And he smiled. The son of a bitch _smiled._

"Gods I love you, woman." He said, starting to laugh.

"Don't get used to it," I spat.

Very carefully, he lifted a hand and moved the sword tip away from his neck. "I came close enough to having my head removed the other day. I don't advise threats you don't mean."

"I did," I said tightly.

"Do you have any idea how magnificent you are, holding a blade to my throat and spitting like a wildcat?" his voice was deep and there was a smile in his eyes.

I sheathed my sword and glared at him.

"Wildcat." His voice was caressing.

"I thought my new name was _whore_," I said coldly. "I can think of a few for _you_."

"I don't think you're a whore. I shouldn't have said that. And if I have anything to say about it, no one else will either."

"Gee, thanks. Nice to know I won't be an embarrassment." I was close to tears now and would be damned if I showed it. I was blocking so hard I was getting a headache.

"So you don't want a divorce?"

I refused to answer that.

"Your past doesn't matter. You're my mate, and no one will doubt it. If your former companions find their way to us, it will make no difference, I swear it."

"It doesn't matter anyway," I said flatly. "They're dead."

His face stilled. "I see."

"You might have found that out before you started calling me names." I looked away, staring at the nearest doorway.

He ran his hand through his hair and down his face. His voice was very quiet. "I've wronged you. I apologize."

I looked back, and tears were starting to cloud my vision. Before I could say anything, he asked softly, "What were their names?"

I did start crying then, and he pulled me to him. "Daxon Ondi and Jareth Adso."

He rested his face on my hair, and sighed. "I knew Dax; he was a good man. He was with me during the war."

"He never mentioned you." I was sniffling and wiped my nose on my sleeve.

"Probably not by name. I was his commanding officer. How did they die?" he asked, almost gently.

"We had taken a job as security for a cantina in this space station out near Taris. The station was a rough place, been built by the Republic but had been abandoned because it was too close to the smuggling trade routes and too far out to maintain order. A Hutt eventually took it over."

I felt Canderous nod against the top of my head. "Yeah, I know the place,"

"The Cantina owner was a good man, just down on his luck and couldn't afford to relocate. He saw us fight in the battle ring and needed some muscle to keep his bar from being decimated every night. We agreed to stay for a while, and the pay was good. We had that place running smooth in a week," I said with pride, but still choking back tears. Canderous made a soothing noise, rubbing my back.

"It was going great, until the Hutt decided his cut wasn't big enough, and sent his 'business manager' and a bunch of mercs in to collect," I continued. "Davin simply didn't have it, tried to make a deal, but the mercs started shooting, and everything went to hell. Dax and Jareth died protecting Davin. I was across the room; I fought like crazy, but when I got to the bar, all three of them were dead. They had taken down five of the eight mercs, but the whole damn cantina got into the fight, and by the time I could get there…" I swallowed.

When I could speak again, I concluded, "Some of the regulars I was friendly with smuggled me out; one of them had access to departure codes, and helped me get to the ship and away. The Hutt wouldn't have let me live. They were my friends, and I couldn't even bury them." I cried harder, soaking his shirt.

I had cried for Jareth and Dax that day, but not since. I had shut it away, and tried not to think about it after I had given them a memorial service of sorts. Two of the things I kept in my credit pouch were the clan brooches they had been wearing, with the vague idea that if I ever ran across family of theirs I could tell them what had happened. Mostly, though, I had kept them to remind me of when I had friends. I took them out and showed the brooches to Canderous. He touched them briefly, and I saw him close his eyes for a moment.

When he spoke, it was regretful. "I'm sorry, Wildcat. There was nothing you could have done. They died in battle, protecting their boss. It was a good death, for them."

"I know…but it hurts anyway. They were good to me, and for a while I wasn't alone." I sniffled again, and Canderous kissed my forehead.

"You're not alone anymore," he said.

"No," I whispered.

_And we never will be again._

I hadn't even realized I'd stopped blocking him. _Never, _I answered.

We resumed our walk, holding hands. He wasn't used to it, I could tell. We were mostly silent, occasionally speaking aloud, but largely communicating without words. It was amazing how comfortable it was. In only three days he was closer to me than anyone ever had been or will be. Once I'd completely gotten a hold of myself, I turned to him.

"So, what's with this wife thing?"

He looked at me, then away. "I hadn't meant to say that yet."

"You did, though. You didn't say, 'future wife', you didn't say 'when you're my wife', you said 'you're my wife'. Along with 'as the Mandalore's wife'. You followed up with calling me a cantina whore, so maybe I didn't hear it properly."

He winced. "How many years will it be until you stop mentioning that?"

"Oh, about never." I smiled wickedly. "As for 'wife', I don't recall you asking."

"I wasn't going to until after the mission, actually. I wanted to wait until we didn't have that over our heads." He sounded casual, but I wasn't fooled.

I looked at him, not sure how to ask what was on my mind without sounding snippy. I couldn't, so just said "Were you really going to ask, or just tell me where and when to show up?" I strove for a light tone. He glanced at me sharply, then relented.

"I was going to ask. I didn't consider you'd say no, though, let alone ask for a divorce so soon." He was teasing, but his voice was sober. "I wanted to do it better. I admit I hadn't worked out a plan yet. I've never had to before and didn't want to mess it up. So much for that idea."

"But you said I _am_ your wife."

"You are, to me." He said simply. "The moment I knew you were my mate, I thought of you that way. I'm not fool enough to think you did as well. Although that little scene at the fight ring pretty much confirmed you do accept you're my mate."

I shivered at the memory, and nodded. "I went crazy because they had tried to kill you. I wasn't thinking clearly, but I know somewhere in there was the thought that they had tried to murder what was mine. I'm pretty sure 'mate' was in there too. 'Husband', however…I think at the time, and now, it's just that it's not an adequate word to describe who and what you are to me. You're more than that. I don't need the legal part of it."

He looked at me, his blue eyes fathomless. I felt so many emotions off him, running like quicksilver. I'd hurt him a little, and hadn't meant to. I tried to convey my regret and apology, and I felt the acceptance.

"Well," he said quietly, "I do."

We regarded each other, then I said softly, "Then I do too."

He could feel that I wasn't humoring him, or making a compromise. He needed it, and that made it my need too. Simple as that. I kissed him, tasting the flavor of his heart, and he held me, strong and safe and his.

"Jennet Jax, will you do me the honor of consenting to be my wife?" His voice was husky, and his eyes were very bright.

"Yes. Oh, yes," I answered.


	18. Chapter 18

Author's note: I've finally hit a place where the action meets up with the game. I've put my own twist on the events from Telos through the endgame; there's a difference, to my mind, of how the game is played and what you would really do with a ship full of Jedi and soldiers, and a space station at risk. So while my story is _based_ on the game, it's not going to follow the events exactly. Fair warning :0)

Thanks for the reviews and support so far! Please keep commenting, I really enjoy feedback.

Thanks - LJ

* * *

**Canderous**

We were on our way to Telos, and the crew was keyed up. The plan was to go to Artis' hidden base first, assess the situation there, and see if we could come up with a clue as to where Kriea had fled to. I was eager to _do_ something, anything. I was glad of our time on Nar Shadaa, and deeply aware of how short it had been, and how precious. Finding Jennet was the best thing that had ever happened to me, and I knew she felt the same. But now I was gearing for battle, and impatient to get on with it. Jennet was too, outwardly relaxed, but I could feel her anticipation humming in the background of my thoughts.

She was sitting at the table in the common room, eating lunch. I'm still amazed at her appetite; she's hardly bigger than a child of eight in my world, and yet can eat more than many full-grown warriors. I liked her gusto with good food, and sincerely wondered how much she could drink. With her metabolism, I suspected she could put most of my men under the table. I made a mental note to test this someday, and wondered what she was like tipsy. I'd seen her irritated, gravely wounded, warm with desire, confused, crying, shouting, and, most memorably, in a magnificent rage. I was looking forward to seeing her in all moods. I suddenly wondered what she would look like carrying a child.

She caught at least some of that, and looked up, startled.

_You're thinking babies_?

_Someday, yes. How much did you hear?_

_Just a flash of me, pregnant. Not barefoot, though, thank the Gods._

I ignored the jibe. Our silent communication had progressed astonishingly. We were so used to it now that we tended to not 'listen in' exactly, but did keep our link open constantly. It was like being in a crowded room, having a conversation with one person, but hearing the buzz of voices in the background. You don't actually listen to it unless something gets your attention. We had found, however, that even if we weren't actively listening, we could sort of play it back if we needed to. We each could tell if the other was actively tuning in, or not, and could block each other entirely if needed. That was actually harder to do than you'd think, and blocking too long tended to give me a headache.

_I'm not expecting to try right away, Wildcat. _I'd heard the slight anxiety in her tone, and reassured her. _I was only thinking…someday. I think you would look beautiful carrying our child._

The thing I liked the most about not having to talk out loud is that I could say things to her that I find difficult to express audibly. I'm possibly the least romantic person in the universe, but in my head I can say the things to her that I'd rather cut my tongue out than have anyone else hear.

I have a reputation to maintain, after all.

_You just don't want anyone to know you're a softie._

_That's not what you thought last night._

_True, _she purred.

_Is the Mandalore a hereditary position? _She thought suddenly.

_No. It goes to whoever the current one chooses as his successor. If he hasn't chosen, and dies, it goes to who challenges for the helm and wins. Traditionally, anyway. I got it because no one else was around to challenge, and someone needed to. It does pass to a son fairly often, though._

_You got it because you cared enough to try and rebuild, _her tone was stern. _Don't sell yourself short._

_I'm not. I had a decent chance of it before the war ended, actually. I lost focus after that for a long time._

_Dax thought the world of you, _she said. _He didn't mention you by name, sure, but he told me war stories and he practically worshiped his commanding officer. I believe some of his exact words were 'hard-assed son of a bitch with a mind like a razor and the heart of a Lagartoz War Dragon'._

_He did, eh? Well, he was a good soldier. _I was pleased with the praise, and sorry Dax was dead. _Did he and, Jareth, was it? _I felt her confirmation. _Did they ever know where you came from?_

_Yes, and no. I told them where my parents originated, and where I'd grown up. We spent four months flying around, doing odd jobs. We'd been at the cantina for two months when they were killed. I told them about my healing after Dax noticed that I never seemed to have a bruise and had seen me take a hit that should have killed me. I didn't mention Jedi at first. He was stubborn though, and eventually I just told them an edited version. By that time, we'd been a team about three months, and they didn't seem to mind._

_I remember Dax was a persistent bastard. How edited?_

_Just that my parents were Jedi trained, and passed it along to me. Neither of them were Masters, anyway. I told them the extent of my ability, and they dropped it. I never played up the Jedi angle, no point rocking the boat. They both were Mandalorian, after all._

She got up to put her dishes away. I was pleased that she seemed to understand Mandalorian mentality, even then. It spoke well for her chances of being accepted as my mate. I had no doubt she would win them over, but every bit helps.

"_Attention everyone, we're thirty minutes from Telos."_ Atton announced over the general comm. _"Captain's orders: suit up, and be ready. Thanks for flying Ebon Hawk transport."_

As I was already in my armor, I had nothing to do except wait. Jennet was suited up too, blades and blaster in place, and several daggers about her person. She didn't like carrying a bandolier for grenades, claimed it got in her way. Considering her style of combat, I didn't argue. She was quick and fluid, relying on speed and accuracy over brute strength, though she was damn strong for all that. At only 40 kilos or so, she could hit hard enough to make me stagger, and I was almost triple her mass. I was looking forward to seeing her in the battle circle on Dxun.

There was about twenty minutes more of waiting. Jennet was pacing around the cabin, Mira sitting quietly, eyes shut, looking as if she was dozing, Disciple had his nose in a datapad, and I was sitting impatiently but trying not to join Jennet in her endless walking. Just as I was about to give up and pace too, another announcement came over the comm.

_Everyone report to the common room. We've got a situation._

That woke everyone up. Visas joined us from the women's dorm, and Ladria, Atton, and Bao Dur emerged from the cockpit, where the Iridonian had disappeared to after the first announcement. He was the unofficial XO of our little group, and took his duty seriously.

Ladria wasted no time bringing up to speed. "We've intercepted transmissions from Telos station. They're under attack from the Sith, with a warship bombarding close by. Apparently, Sith troops have overrun the space station. We still need to get to the hidden base on the planet's surface and talk to Artis if we're going to have a shot at finding Kriea. This is the plan: Atton and I will drop the rest of you at the station to lend assistance there; they need every hand they can get, and you're all far better trained and experienced than their militia. We'll proceed to the hidden base, take care of business there, and catch up. Bao Dur, you are in charge until I get back. Talk to Lt. Grenn, if you can find him, and offer assistance. We'll be in touch by comlink. We heard that the militia there is employing a group of mercenaries to help. It might be a good idea to join forces with them."

"Any idea if the mercs are Mandalorian?" I asked.

"They didn't say. But if they are, they'll likely follow you. If that is the case, split into two groups with Mandalore leading his men. Work with Lt. Grenn about a way to take out that warship."

I nodded grimly. I had an idea, but needed to see the situation before I offered it. "Aye, Captain," I said, echoing Bao Dur.

"The rest of you…be alert, try to stick together. We'll meet you as soon as we can. Good luck, and good hunting."

Atton and Ladria returned to the cockpit; the rest of us, minus the droids, headed to the garage to evac the ship as soon as it touched down. Bao Dur gestured to T-3 to the controls for the door. We landed with a hell of a bump, the hatch opened, and we fanned out as we rushed out onto the dock, Mira and I in the lead, blasters at the ready. Visas, Jennet, Disciple and Bao Dur stayed slightly behind, swords and 'sabers drawn and poised. A quick check turned up no one. I gave the 'all clear' sign and we proceeded to the door.

Mira and I covered it as Bao Dur opened it. It was locked, and Visas murmured there were at least six soldiers on the other side. Jennet was balanced on the balls of her feet as Bao Dur worked the door, the others in position, ready to strike. The door slammed open, and blaster shots began ringing out immediately. I felt Jennet leap into the fray; there were about eight Sith soldiers waiting for us, blasters blazing. I returned fire as my wildcat danced through the energy bolts and quickly dispatched one of the soldiers. It was hardly a fight; between the three light sabers, Mira and my blasters, and Jennet's swords, the Sith didn't last two minutes. The Ebon Hawk was hardly away when we bolted down the corridor.

We found Lt. Grenn fast. He and Bao Dur had a quick conference. The rest of us listened in, and the upshot was that they desperately needed to get to the ship, which they had identified as the Ravager, that was bombing the station. He gave us the location of the shuttle that could take us there. Bao Dur told Grenn that Ladria and Atton would be returning soon.

"We'll keep the docks clear, and help with communications so they can locate you when they arrive. We need to protect the fuel supply, as well." Lt. Grenn.

"We'll see what we can do about that. I'm in touch with the General by comlink; but any assistance is appreciated." Bao Dur said.

"Were are the mercenaries?" I asked. "Are any of them Mandalorians?"

Lt. Grenn looked surprised. "Yes, they all are in fact. They've been putting up a hell of a fight, and we're grateful for the help." He gave us the last known location, and I turned to Bao Dur.

"Jennet and I will head that way and round them up. They'll be useful for storming the Ravager." I was also eager to get into action with my kin, but didn't say it. I saw Jennet give me a quirk with her mouth, and knew she'd heard the thought.

Bao Dur nodded. "All right. The rest of you, come with me."

Visas unexpectedly spoke up. "I'd like to go with Jennet and Mandalore. A Jedi on hand might prove useful."

I opened my mouth to argue, but Jennet stopped me with a thought.

_She's right, and I have a feeling we'll need her._

_All right, Wildcat. We'll deal with my men when we get there; they won't appreciate a jetti in their midst, but they'll do as I say._

_And what will they assume _I_ am?_

_Not necessarily. I didn't think jetti when I saw you fight the first time._

_What _did_ you think? _Her tone was curious.

_That you were the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen._

_Really? _She sounded surprised, but very pleased.

_Yes._

"We could use you," I said aloud, looking at Visas.

Bao Dur agreed, and he, Disciple and Mira headed one way, Jennet, Visas and I the other.

We ran into a mess of Sith almost as soon as we were out of sight of the other half of our party. Eight or ten, with a Dark Jedi to boot. Visas took that one on, and Jennet, with an inner shout of exaltation, stormed into the thick of it, slicing a bloody swath through the enemy. I felt her absorb my battle ecstasy and join it with her Force abilities. My vision and awareness grew stronger, and I picked off the stray fighters with deadly precision. Soon, there were bodies littering the area, and we were off again.

I could tell Jennet hadn't taken a hit, and Visas had paused only momentarily to heal herself from a nasty burn on her arm the Dark Jedi had given her. Continuing down the station, we ran smack into another patrol, only four this time. I got two before Jennet or Visas could even engage; they made short work of the others. We ran on, and fought our way to the area where my men were last seen.

When we got there, it was to find six Mandalorians, pinned in a room, under fire from about twelve Sith soldiers; I could see about six more, dead. The battle was about even, really, the Sith couldn't enter the room without being cut down, and the blaster shots were thick in the air. We plowed in from behind, me picking off as many as I could, Jennet ferociously swinging through the rabble with her whirling blades, and Visas efficiently cutting down anything that moved. Between us and my trapped kin, the Sith were dead in minutes.

I entered the room, and looked over the men. Visas and Jennet were briskly frisking the bodies and tossing weaponry into the room.

"Good job, men," I said generally. There was a start of recognition that rippled through the six that had survived. Two bodies of fallen Mandalorians were nearby. "How many did you get before you got bottlenecked?"

There was a rumble through the group, and one man stepped forward. "About twenty, Mandalore," he said with a grin. "Only lost Cerdic and Janus." His face fell a little at that. Rallying, he continued, "Sith aren't as tough as we hoped."

I stared at the man, stunned. "Dax?"

Then I heard Jennet behind me gasp and felt her shock as she caught sight of him. I wasn't looking at her, but knew she'd just turned white to the lips.

"Dax?" she echoed me, uncertainly. "You're alive?"


	19. Chapter 19

Daxon Ondi looked over at Jennet, and his face darkened. He drew his blaster, and had it aimed at Jennet before I could recover my own surprise at seeing him.

"Traitorous jetti bitch!" He spat at her.

As he started to open fire, I threw myself in front of her and took a blast to the chest. Thank the Gods I had a shield in place. I hit the ground, and Jennet wasn't there anymore; she'd launched herself at Dax and had the weapon out of his hands so fast I couldn't follow the movement. I had just been shot, after all. She followed up with a vicious slam to the side of his head, and he went down, stunned but not unconscious. The rest of the Mandalorians were moving to grab Jennet when I roared "Nobody move!"

Jennet, of course, ignored this and had her blade at Dax's throat in a blink. The rest of the men stopped, uncertain what to do. I got up and removed my helm.

"Dax, we seem to have a misunderstanding here." I said in my best don't-fuck-with-me voice. I saw movement and snapped, "Stay where you are or I'll let the ladies cut you down where you stand."

There was a dark grumbling and several nasty looks thrown at Jennet and Visas, but nobody moved. I felt a wave of healing energy and the pain in my chest evaporated. I sent a silent thanks to Jennet who acknowledged with a curt nod. She didn't take her eyes off the man in front of her.

Dax looked up at me, open-mouthed. "General Ordo? But…when did you become Mandalore? And what are you doing with jetti? Especially this conniving whore?"

"What is it with you guys and that word?" Jennet asked conversationally. She glared at Dax, then her face softened. "And why are you not dead?"

In a tone of deadly calm, I informed him, "You will watch how you refer to my mate, or I'll cut the tongue out of your head."

"Mate?!" His eyes went wide, and then his face contorted. "You are no Mandalore, consorting with jetti." He spat the word.

"You know, I keep warning, you keep talking. Jennet?" She smiled, and dug the blade a little closer.

He glared up at her. "Go ahead. If my bretheran have fallen so far as to accept a jetti as mate, I'd prefer death."

Jennet spoke softly. "I thought you were dead, Dax. I _felt_ it; there was no life force. I mourned for you and Jareth. I wouldn't have left, otherwise."

He looked up, disbelieving. "I saw how you could heal. Yet you ran rather than help a partner. I was taken to the Hutt and tortured for months before I could escape. I killed the Hutt and vowed I would find you and kill you for leaving me and Jareth for dead."

"Jareth survived?" Jennet's voice was barely a whisper.

Dax shook his head. "No. He died in the cantina, with Davin. I was barely alive; the next thing I knew I was in a kolto tank, being healed. Hutts prefer their victims alive and healthy. I spent three months being starved and tortured. I escaped when one of the Hutt's guards got careless and opened my cell when he thought I had passed out. I snapped his neck, found the Hutt and killed him and four of his bodyguards. I stole a ship and have been looking for you ever since."

He shot a look of loathing at me, then looked at her again, seething with fury. "And now I find you're spreading your poison, claiming the Mandalore as mate. Canderous, kill her now and end this madness. She's cast some jetti spell on you; you can't be in your right mind."

"Son," I used the term by habit; he was certainly not the young man of fifteen years ago anymore. "I'm going to say this one last time because I don't want to kill you. Watch your mouth how you speak of Jennet; she's my mate, and I will prove it when we are with our people again. You will show her proper respect, or I will see to it personally that you wear your guts outside your armor."

I paused, and he glowered, but wisely kept quiet. "Now…Jennet, tell him what you told me. You," I pointed to the remaining five, "Get yourselves re-armed, if you need to. Make one wrong move toward either of the ladies and you'll be dead before you hit the deck. We've got work to do, and the Sith won't stay away long." I picked a likely looking lad out of the bunch. "You, there, your name?" I barked.

"Jenks, Sir. Barton Jenks."

"Jenks, go seal the door. This might take a bit."

"Yes, Mandalore," he said, and hurried to do so.

Meanwhile, Jennet was talking to Dax, quietly and earnestly. She even healed him; he'd taken more than a few hits and was showing it. I watched for a moment, and joined them. Dax was starting to relent, and Jennet had lowered her sword. She hadn't sheathed it – I approved; she couldn't let her guard down completely. But Dax was listening now.

"I'm sorry Dax, really. I wouldn't have gone if I had thought there was any chance you were alive." Jennet was saying.

Dax said slowly, "You really felt no life force at all?"

"No," she said simply. "I checked first; the guys that got me out were insisting we leave immediately but I couldn't go until I knew for sure. There was no breath, no pulse, no life force at all. I can't imagine how you survived." She dug in her pouch and handed something to Dax. "I took these off you and Jareth. I thought if I ever met any kin of yours, I could at least tell them that you had died as a Mandalorian should: in battle."

"What she says is true, Dax." I broke in. "I saw how she mourned you and Jareth. She told me about you, and admired your loyalty to me. She told me what you said about me during the war. 'Hard-assed son of a bitch with a mind like a razor and the heart of a Lagartoz War Dragon' is how I think you put it?"

Dax nodded, staring at the brooches in his hand. "Yeah. You were, you know."

"Well, I still am." I saw him start to grin, and suppress it. I looked hard at him, and he looked back, uncertain but proud. "You have a choice here: believe that Jennet wouldn't have abandoned a friend, or not. Believe in me, or not." I was matter of fact, no threat in my tone.

I could see him thinking furiously, and when he'd made up his mind. "I spent the last four years hating you," Dax said gruffly, looking up at Jennet. "I have wronged you. I apologize."

Jennet smiled. "There's nothing to forgive. I'm so glad you're alive. I don't blame you for thinking I abandoned you; I probably would have thought so myself if it was the other way around."

Dax gave her a tight smile. "I guess I wouldn't have blamed you either." He looked at me, and said uncertainly, "She's really your mate?"

"The signs are there," I said simply. "It was a bit of a shock to me, I can tell you."

Dax grinned suddenly. "I can imagine. She's a real spitfire, that one. She'll do."

I stiffened a little, then relaxed. "Yeah, she'll do." I felt Jennet's warm glow in my head.

_You'll do too._

I offered my hand to Dax, and he took it, clasping warrior to warrior. I hauled him up and he stood, looking at me consideringly. "I can't wait to see what the rest of our people have to say about this. But if it comes to it, I'll stand with you."

"I appreciate it. Now, we have work to do."

Everyone was reloaded and ready to go. I took a minute to get names from the four I hadn't talked to yet: Danald Ubi, Rath Yar, Erik Conti, and Angus Leit. They were good men, young, except Dax. A little thrown by Jennet and Visas and the sudden appearance of the Mandalore in their midst, but when Dax gave them a reassuring look, they were willing to follow me. I took note of that; Dax was a good leader.

"Captain Ondi, we're about to take on a battleship full of Sith. What say you?" He had been a lieutenant during the war; I figured he deserved a promotion.

"I say bring them on, General. Let them taste the wrath of the Mandalore." Dax saluted smartly and I returned it.

"Good man. Now, let me make this clear: Jennet and Visas here are two of the most kick ass fighters I've ever seen. They will lead with me; the rest of you don't get in their way. Our goal is to get to the shuttle bay and get on board the warship that's blasting the hell out of this station. We'll be met there by allies, all of which are jetti. I know you have reservations about jetti; get over it. They need us, we need them. Got it?" I glared around the faces of my kin, and none flinched. "Good. From there, we're going to find a way to blow the thing out of the sky. I need every one of you to get this done. This mission _must_ be accomplished. Any questions?"

"No, Sir, Mandalore," the bellowed in unison. I felt Jennet exchange glances with Visas, but she didn't laugh, largely due to my silent fierce admonishment not to.

We headed out, and somewhat to my surprise, no Sith had come this way during our interlude. We headed toward the shuttle bay, spread out so as not to present as large a target. Jennet was on my left, Visas on my right. We made our way as quickly as possible, and ran into trouble within sight of the door that lead to our goal.

We needed to turn left to get to the shuttle bay, and ahead of us was a huge number of Sith. They opened fire and charged as we approached, and we engaged. There were too many of them, so we retreated to a room down a twisting corridor. We shored up our defenses there, using anything in the room for cover. The Sith couldn't just storm the room; all but Visas were armed with blasters as well as swords and could pick off the enemy if they tried.

There was a confused prolonged firefight with blasters roaring back and forth, then the Sith broke through and were able to engage with blades. I saw Jennet wade in with a huge grin on her face; the battle ecstasy had kicked in, and she was a blur of shining metal. I wasn't anywhere near her when I felt a blow to her head and suddenly, her connection was cut off.

I staggered a little when she got hit, but recovered and continued to blast away, trying to get to her. I had started toward her when something went entirely wrong. Dax was nearby when she went down, and out of nowhere I felt nothing like I've ever felt before. Jennet was suddenly awake, completely blank but in a terrifying rage. She leaped up and was a whirling bundle of steel and feet and mindless violence. Dax jumped out of the way, and she ran straight toward the mass of Sith in the doorway.

We were all fighting for our lives as Jennet, completely berzerk, danced through the enemy, hacking and slashing and cutting down every living thing near her. She twirled and feinted and parried and thrust. Our party was dropping back as the juggernaught that was my mate took out every Sith that came within reach. She wasn't recognizing friend from foe; Visas, Dax and the rest of the Mandalorians got the hell out of her way when her blade started toward them. In a dance of death that made the scene in the cantina where I first saw her look like a civilized minuet, she savagely mowed down anyone that came close to her.

I stared, completely stunned and unable to reach her. I tried with everything I had to break through the utter void that she had become. She continued on her path of brutal killing, and in less than ten minutes every Sith attacking us was dead. She turned to look for another victim, and started toward me. Before I had a chance to react, she suddenly stopped dead in her tracks.

"Hurry!" Visas barked at me. "You need to calm her down, or knock her out. I don't know how long I can hold her!"

I realized that Visas had thrown a stasis field on Jennet. They were both struggling; Jennet to escape, Visas to hold her in place. I got a hold of myself and reached out to Jennet with my mind. There was nothing there, at first, but under the blank rage I could feel her, the real her.

_Jennet, come back. _It was the first thing I could think of. _Help me help you._

I tuned in, and felt something alien inside her. Something clicked; I remembered our match and the stim I had taken. That's what had happened; Dax had given her stim to wake her up when she'd been knocked out. I had no idea it would do this to her, but I had to try and neutralize it somehow. I remembered how she had gotten it out of me and hoped like hell I could do what she had done.

I walked up to her and put my hands over her heart. I could feel her struggling to break free of the stasis and ignored it. I concentrated on the alien feeling, all the while talking to her in my head.

_It's okay, Wildcat. I'm here; I can help._ I repeated this over and over as I tried to remember how she'd drawn the stim out of me. Something in her touched me, and I grabbed it. Using the faint link as a guide, I gathered up the energy of the stim and drew it down. I could feel it passing out of her. As it left, I felt her start to crash, and infused my own energy to keep her from passing out. I was starting to feel light headed when I nodded to Visas and Jennet collapsed in my arms, her mind meeting mine with a confused awareness.

_What happened?_ Was the first fuzzy thought I got from her. I increased the energy between us. I couldn't heal her, but I could, and did, give her my own life force to bolster her.

_I think someone gave you stim, _I answered silently. _I didn't know it had this effect on you. Explains a lot about that fight we had, hm?_

Her healing energy kicked in, and what damage I had taken also faded away. I heard everyone in the room but Visas gasp a little; Jennet was still a little out of control and had spread the healing around to the general crowd. I could feel her regain composure, and relaxed as relief flooded me. I felt Visas' healing wash over me and Jennet as well.

My wildcat looked up at me and smiled, her mouth wobbling a little.

"Did we win?"

I looked at the decimated enemy and grinned. "Yeah, we did."

"Good." She detached herself from me, and I could feel that she was back to normal.

She looked around the room. My men were staring, open-mouthed, and I remembered how I had felt when I saw her in the cantina. There was a look of respect, and awe, and not a little fear on their faces. She focused on Dax. "Did you give me stim?" she asked quietly.

He gulped, but answered steadily enough, "Yes. You were out, and it was all I had."

"It's okay," she said kindly. "But future reference: Don't ever do that again." She looked back at me then, and asked, "How?"

"I don't know, exactly," I answered honestly. "You told me how to get it out of you."

"I've only once had someone give me stim. It didn't go well," she said. "I should be out cold right now."

"Think of it as a benefit of being my mate," I offered. "We're linked; I gave you some of my strength." I heard a low murmur among the Mandalorians at that.

"Thank you," she said simply, and kissed me soundly.

"You're welcome," I said gruffly. "Don't do that again."

She turned to Visas and gave her a tremulous smile. "Thanks."

Visas smiled gently back. "I did what was needed. No thanks are necessary."

"Well thank you anyway."

"Wildcat, we need to get to the shuttle. You okay?" I broke in; we didn't have time for this.

"Yeah."

"Let's go, then."


	20. Chapter 20

**Jennet**

Canderous led us back down the corridor, comming Bao Dur as we went. "We're close to the rendezvous. How are you guys doing?"

I heard Bao Dur's tinny voice shouting over the comlink. "We took out some gun turrets for the TSF; they're secure out here now. The General and Atton are on their way and will meet us at the rendezvous. The Sith have thinned out; we're heading your direction. Lt. Grenn reports the fuel supply is near you; think you can take care of that?"

"Will do, see you soon. Out." Canderous called, "Change of plans; we're taking care of the fuel supply issue. Follow me."

We hurried past the shuttle bay, and turned right down a short corridor, then left to find a huge double door, locked. The Mandalorian named Jenks moved forward at Canderous's gesture, and shortly the door whooshed open.

The room was full of Sith, along with a couple of Dark Jedi to make things interesting. Visas and I rushed forward to engage these two while the rest of our crew commenced firing. These two were tougher than the ones we'd encountered before. I had my hands full keeping him from getting in a blow. I felt Canderous picking off troopers in a steady stream of energy.

_Behind you, Wildcat._

With his warning, I managed to block a trooper who was aiming his vibrosword at my head, intent on parting it company with my neck. I twisted so I was fighting sideways, parrying the trooper and the evil Jedi simultaneously. I leaped around, beat the trooper's blade out of my way, and ran him through the chest, immediately turning back to the Jedi. He hadn't been close enough to get in a blow while my back had been turned. He was trying to get in a Force strike of some sort; it gave me enough of an opening to slash at his throat and he fell back, gurgling obscenely.

I helped Visas dispatch her Jedi; she had been doing fine without me but no point prolonging things. We whipped around to scan for more enemy to find them all dead. Opening the door in the back, we found yet more Sith; only a few this time, easily handled. I let the Mandalorians get in some good kill time and looked around the room. There were containers of fuel everywhere, and barrels of other chemicals and various parts. Canderous joined me, taking in components, and started to smile.

"What?" I asked. "You've got an idea, I can tell."

"Just an old Mandalorian war trick. Dax! Get over here," he called, and my former partner hurried to join us.

"You thinking the same thing I am?" Canderous gestured to the stuff stacked around, and Dax started to grin.

"Yes, Sir!" He said happily. "Jenks and I can have some made in no time."

"Anyone want to tell me what's going on?" I asked.

"Bombs, Wildcat. Proton bombs. Set around a ship in strategic spots, they can blow the entire piece of metal out of the sky." He motioned to Dax. "Get on it, I want four made as quick as you two can."

"Aye, Sir. Jenks!" The younger man trotted over, and the two of them started pulling supplies.

"Smart," I said approvingly. "Will it really work?"

"Used it all the time during the war. We'll need to remote detonate, of course. I don't fancy being blown up with the enemy. We'll set one of my men on that, while the rest of us storm the ship." He took out the comlink again. "Mandalore here. What's your ETA?"

Bao Dur's voice crackled over the comlink. "Just a few minutes. The General and Atton are not far behind."

"We'll meet you there. I have good news. Out." He disconnected and turned back to Jenks and Dax. "Get them down to the shuttle bay as soon as they're assembled. Yar, Ubi, stay here and cover them, just in case. Leit, Conti, come with us."

We headed back to the shuttle bay. We'd been there only a few minutes when Bao Dur, Mira, and Disciple arrived. Mira was grinning, and Disciple looked as excited as if he'd personally met one of his heroes in the Jedi archives. I smiled at them in greeting and they grinned back.

"The station is almost clean; the militia is handling the rest of the stragglers. Best fight I've had in ages," Mira crowed enthusiastically.

"That was quite invigorating," Disciple chimed in, sounding like he'd just left a tea party. But his usually carefully neat clothes were disheveled, and his face was shining with sweat. His hair was rumpled and wild, and he looked like he'd been having the time of his life. I chuckled, changing it to a cough when he looked over at me.

Bao Dur was conferring with Canderous, who was shaking his head and saying "Let's wait until Ladria gets here."

On the heels of that, she did arrive, Atton, HK-47, and Go-To in tow. That they'd been running was obvious.

"Report," she said, a little breathlessly.

Bao Dur spoke up first. "The gun turrets are neutralized, and most of the Sith are dead. Mandalore recruited six of his men, and stopped the sabotage attempt on the fuel supply."

Canderous looked at Ladria, and said in his deep voice, "Group effort, not me. I've got two of my men building proton bombs to take out the Ravager." He gave his plan, Ladria nodding as he spoke.

"Excellent. Pick a man to activate the remote detonator. How long before they have the bombs built?"

"About another half hour," Canderous answered.

"Good. Four of your men will carry them; I don't want any mistakes and they're familiar with the technology. Lt. Grenn provided schematics of the class of ship we're invading." She punched up the plans on a nearby terminal, and we all crowded around to look. "It would be more efficient to split up, but I want to stay together; we don't know how many are left on board and I want to take out resistance as quickly as possible. We'll head down this way," she pointed on the terminal, tracing her finger down the plans. "loop around and go to the main part of the ship here."

There were nods all around. She quickly ran through the rest of the plan, then handed each of us locator chips that we slapped somewhere on our person.

"These have been linked to the computer system on the station, overlaying our position on the schematics. The man you leave here can monitor our progress, and communicate by comlink."

Just then, Dax and Jenks, followed by Yar and Ubi. All four were carrying a small device. I eyed them dubiously. Such a small thing to bring down a whole ship. Canderous caught the thought.

_It works, Wildcat._

_I believe you; it's just they're so small._

_Powerful things are often in small packages. You ought to know that, of all people. _

He quirked an eyebrow at me and grinned. I grinned back.

Canderous got Jenks set up on the computer terminal, clapping him on the arm as left to join the rest of us.

"All right, let's move out," Ladria said, and we all filed behind her to the shuttle.

It was short flight, and my heart was in my mouth the whole time. I have no problem with battle, but I have a huge issue with being stuck in a flying metal box while being picked off by big energy cannons from space. I sighed in relief when we docked.

We fanned out again as we headed down the corridor. Oddly, no one was there immediately. Canderous and I exchanged puzzled looks. Angus, Erik, Dax, and Danald all had bombs strapped to their chests; I was sticking close to Dax and Danald, Canderous to Angus and Erik. According to the schematics, it wasn't far to the first bomb site. We were moving as fast as we could without running.

Only a short distance from the shuttle bay, we approached a large door I remembered was the bridge. Visas stopped abruptly, a hand to her temple.

"He's here," she said, as close to frightened as I'd ever heard her. She looked at Ladria, and said quietly. "No. You do not want to go in there. I should; my life for yours."

Ladria smiled at the other woman, her eyes gentle. "You have done enough, Visas. This is not your task."

"You don't understand…he will kill you. He is strong, and he is evil. I can't let you do this; it is my place to right this wrong."

Ladria looked at Visas, then all of us, and said quietly "He can try, and I am stronger. You know your mission. I will join you when I can."

The door suddenly opened, and Ladria stepped through. Atton tried to follow, but she threw a stasis on him. The door shut on her as suddenly as it had opened, and she was gone.

Atton was released, and started to try and get through the door, shouting. Bao Dur joined him, but gave up shortly, shaking his head.

"It's sealed tight, nothing's getting through that." He was frustrated, his blue eyes sparking with anxious fear. He turned to Atton, and put a hand on the other man's shoulder.

"Atton, you have to calm down and trust she'll be fine. We have a mission, and we have to move. _Now_," he emphasized, when Atton opened his mouth to argue. He glared, but nodded at Bao Dur.

Visas looked almost catatonic, but she said calmly enough, "We cannot help her. We need to finish this. This way," and she started to stride purposefully down the corridor.

I had felt something very dark behind that door, and shivered involuntarily as I followed Visas. I suddenly noticed that we no longer had the droids with us. I hurried up to Bao Dur and pointed this out. We turned around, seeing both HK-47 and Go-To in front of the door, not moving. I heard Bao Dur say something filthy under his breath and started; it was the first time I'd heard him swear. He strode down to talk to the droids, coming back quickly.

"They refuse to budge, say I'm not their master and they'll wait for her. I told them to kill anyone that comes near that isn't us. Gods know if they'll obey." He sounded frustrated and angry.

"Good riddance," Atton muttered.

"I agree," said Canderous, earning him an astonished look from Atton. "The assassin droid won't take orders from anyone but Ladria; better not to have them with us. I don't trust either of them anyway; I'd take them out now if we had time."

Without further comment, we continued toward the first bomb site. We came to a door, covered it as Bao Dur got it open, and immediately were fired upon as it opened. I didn't stop to count, just waded in with Visas, Disciple and Bao Dur as Atton, Canderous, Mira and the Mandalorians covered us with blaster fire. There were at least three Dark Jedi among the crowd of Sith. The blade wielders made for those first, slashing our way through the troopers. I got held up for a while with three troops surrounding me. I parried swiftly, let the two in front and back get close, then leaped backwards as one lunged, his sword extended. He took out his friend with a thrust to the chest, staggered in surprise, and was dead an instant later as I slashed him across the throat. The third was advancing, and I took him out with thrust to the gut. I saw another approach, tossed my right-hand sword at him, and he caught it by reflex, dropping his own. In the same motion, I drew a dagger and threw it, burying it in his forehead. I grabbed my sword back as he fell, and turned back to the Dark Jedi I'd marked. He'd had time to try a force push; I shook it off and charged.

Canderous's battle ecstasy was singing through me, and I could feel his exhalation as he picked off troopers. The Dark Jedi met my swords with his 'saber, and we danced a bit, trying to find an opening. I was careful not to let the light saber too close to my blades and eventually he overreached, and I sliced his hand off. He bellowed in pain and I cured that with a quick thrust to the chest. I looked around and realized everyone else was finishing up. I have no idea why I did what I did next, but I sheathed my swords and picked up the Dark Jedi's 'saber, prying the dead hand off it.

"Anyone find another one of these?" I called out generally. Visas, with a look of surprise, tossed one to me. I held one in each hand, and reached for the Force to ignite them, as my father had taught me. The blades were red, and I didn't like that, but they felt otherwise very natural. I gave them an experimental twirl and they responded beautifully.

Canderous looked wary.

_Not thinking of turning jetti on me, are you Wildcat?_

_No, _I thought back honestly. _They feel good though. But no, I don't want to be a Jedi. I do, however, want to keep my swords, and these would slice them off at the hilt. So I'll use them, for now._

Out loud, mostly for the Mandalorians' benefit, I said, "No point in wasting good weaponry, and if I'm going to be fighting Dark Jedi, at least I won't lose my swords."

Canderous, bless him, just shrugged and said, "Good idea." I looked over at the rest of his kin, and they looked as wary as Canderous had a moment ago. I smiled at them, and they started, stone-faced. I shrugged and hooked the 'sabers on my belt.

We made it to the first bomb site, and killed about five Sith who were in the room. We checked in with Jenks and planted the bomb. Following the corridor to the right, we headed toward the main part of the ship. There was an empty room with a computer terminal; Bao Dur hacked in and located some areas where we could set off gas and take care of some troops in advance. Very efficient. We continued on.

The main part of the ship was chaos; there were troops everywhere. I was in a constant state of heightened awareness and felt Canderous there too. He had taken to being near me during our various engagements; we were an efficient team, mostly back to back, and sensed each other's movement so well it was like one person with three weapons. The 'sabers were lovely to use; they blocked blaster shots like a dream and sliced through anything. We fought our way to the second and third drops, taking out anyone we came upon.

As we got our bearings to head to the fourth bomb site, Visas suddenly spoke.

"This was my room," she said softly.

We were in the barracks area, standing in front of a door that looked like any other. She was staring at it, an odd look on her face. She turned to Bao Dur, and asked, "May I have a moment?"

He opened his mouth to argue, I could sense it. But then he closed it, and nodded. "Don't take long," he warned.

"I will be quick," she promised, and disappeared inside.

As the door shut, there was a crackle from the comlink. Atton's face sagged in relief when Ladria's voice came through, asking our location and promising to catch up. We all took a deep breath in thanks and a faint cheer went up among the Ebon Hawk party. Canderous spoke up.

"Why don't Jennet and I take our men to the fourth site, while you wait here for Visas to finish up and Ladria to arrive? It's not far; we can rendezvous here when the last bomb is set."

Bao Dur agreed, and Mira said she wanted to go along. Canderous and I nodded as one, and headed out, Mira and the Mandalorians in tow. Rounding a corner, we ran smack into a group of Sith, and suddenly we were ass deep in trouble. I waded in, Canderous at my back, and took about about three, Canderous two. Mira was blasting away behind us with the Mandalorians backing her up. When the dust settled, Danald, who had had the last bomb strapped to him, was gravely wounded, and the bomb itself was in pieces. Wires were totally fused, and parts were melted. Canderous growled in frustration.

I tended Danald, healing him and helping him up. He didn't love being healed by me, but didn't refuse it either. Canderous was on the comlink, telling Bao Dur what had happened. They talked back and forth for a bit, then Canderous signed off. He turned to us, face somber.

"We passed a maintenance shop a ways back that had a missile in it with a proton core. Dax, I need you to build another bomb. We're going to join the others, get to that shop, build the bomb, and plant it. Then we're getting the hell out of here."

We trooped back, picked up the rest of the party, and met Ladria and the droids halfway to the maintenance shop. She was paler than usual, but composed and in command. Reaching the bay with very little incident, Dax got to work and quickly assembled another bomb. Ladria, Atton, Canderous, Dax, and I decided to go set the last bomb while the others got to the shuttle bay and kept it secure for our return. The Mandalorians didn't look happy about it until Canderous said something in their language that made them laugh. I was speaking it pretty fluently by this time, but didn't catch it either audibly or mentally.

_What was that all about? _

_I told them it was their chance to show the jetti up._

_I can see why you didn't say that in Galactic Basic, _I chuckled internally. _Ladria probably understood you though._

_She won't mind. She's got a great sense of humor for a jetti._

_True._

We made it to the fourth site. There were a few Sith in the room, but we easily took them out, set the bomb and made for the shuttle. The ship was eerily silent around us.

"It's almost unnecessary to blow this up." I remarked. "I don't think there's enough left alive on board to continue the attack."

"Better to take it out than risk the Sith recovering it. One less ship in their armada," Ladria said reasonably.

"Good point."

We made it to the shuttle with no challenges, and got the hell out of there. I was glad; the place was starting to creep me out entirely. Just before I boarded, I handed one of the light sabers I'd borrowed to Atton.

"You can take the crystals out and put your own in," I said. "I don't need it anymore."

"Thanks," he said, a little startled, but looking pleased.

I gave the other to Mira, who thanked me gravely. "I haven't been able to build my own yet. This could come in handy until then."

I grinned. "Kill lots of Sith with it."

"Will do," she said.

The Mandalorians saw me give away the 'sabers and were giving me looks of approval. I smiled and nodded, but part of me really wanted to keep the 'sabers; they were certainly the best weapon I'd ever used, even better than the spinning swords. My father had trained me to use a light saber, feeling it was only right. However, when people see you armed with one, they assume you're Jedi; when Jedi see you use one and know you aren't, they tend to get irritated. Either situation, until now, was not good for me, so I never did choose to carry one, nor had I ever had an opportunity to use one in actual combat. My parents had theirs, of course, and after my mother's death I kept them. Dad had fought with one in each hand, a long and a short 'saber with yellow crystals, Mom a single long with a violet blade. All three were in a safe place on Onderon, Mom's home planet. I hadn't wanted to risk traveling with them.

Canderous picked up on some of my musings. _You know Wildcat, if you want to become a Jedi, it's okay with me. Honestly._

_I don't, not really. But things are changing...if Ladria and Revan end up in charge of the council, it wouldn't be so bad. And I can't help but think that with their numbers decimated...well, it might be my duty to join. But I can't risk it causing problems for you and your people. I _am _your mate, there's no doubt of that. And if the Mandalorian people can't accept a 'jetti' as the Mandalore's mate, well then I won't be Jedi._

_Things change, Wildcat. Jedi _and_ Mandalorians are nearly extinct. Maybe it's time we work together. Maybe part of the reason the Force chose you as my mate is because my people and yours need each other._

_It's something to consider, I guess. I'll think about it. Anyway, I love you insanely, the Force can't make me do that._ I smiled up at him, and he leaned down to kiss me.

I was tired, and sat leaning on Canderous as we flew back to Telos station. When we were clear, Jenks activated the remote detonator, and we all watched the Ravager explode, eclipsing the stars with its fireworks.

"Ooohh. Pretty," Mira remarked.

"Bet your ass," I said, grinning.

There were shouts and hand slaps and cheers from everyone. We watched as the huge ship dissolved into tiny metal fragments, and Visas, who was seated near me, relaxed visibly.

"One down. The worst to come," she said, so quietly I don't think anyone but me heard her.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

She turned to me, her veiled face still and remote.

"I am now," she said simply.


	21. Chapter 21

Author's note: I read somewhere (after I'd written this, of course) that Malachor V is _not_ the Manalorian home world, in fact, quite the opposite: it's supposed to be forbidden ground of some sort. Well, as I don't have time for a rewrite, and no one has called me on it personally, I am taking artistic liberties. For the purpose of this story, it _is_ the Mandalorian home world. I may rewrite at a later date, but considering how tolerant my family has been about me tapping away, as Jennet and Canderous are prone to say "Can't promise anything."

Thank you for the encouraging reviews, everyone! I'm trying to be better about reviewer/reveiwee ettiquette, and answer everyone that does take the time. Thank you all, and please don't stop!

* * *

When we arrived back at Telos station, the militia was in full celebration, the Sith dead, their home mostly intact. There were faint sounds of celebratory blaster fire and cheers all over the station. Lt. Grenn was actually smiling as we departed the shuttle.

"Thank you all," he said, grasping Ladria's hand in a crushing grip. I saw her wince slightly.

"No thanks necessary." She answered, and gestured at our group. "May we have a minute, and some privacy?" She smiled engagingly.

"Of course, of course," Lt. Grenn said heartily. He waved at a nearby door. "I'll see to it you're not disturbed."

We followed Ladria into a small room off the docks. There were several chairs scattered around. Canderous took one, and I sat on the floor, leaning on his legs. He placed a hand on my head, and I leaned into him, smiling. All the rest of the Mandalorians stood, and so did Bao Dur. There were enough chairs to seat everyone else. Ladria herself stood in front of our group, looking grave. Once everyone was settled, she spoke.

"Darth Nihilous was commander of the Ravager. He's dead now, and no longer a threat to the Republic. Or any one else," she added, with a glance at the Mandalorians. "I learned from him that Kriea has returned to her place of power, and that is where we must go next. She is the key to ending this threat."

"Where is she, General?" Bao Dur's quiet voice cut through the stillness in the room.

"Malachor V."

The storm that broke over the room was deafening. The Mandalorians broke into a collective shout, Bao Dur started violently, and Canderous swore so savagely I flinched. I understood that this place had significance to many of us in the room, not just Canderous and his men, and my heart contracted with sympathy and fear.

Canderous spoke when everyone had settled. "Are you sure?" he asked quietly.

"Yes." Ladria answered, her face calm but her eyes boring into his. She looked up, and met Bao Dur's gaze in an expression I really didn't want to see. There was regret, and fear, and sadness, and memory. I shuddered, and looked up at Canderous. His face was set in a mixture of resignation and grief. I touched his arm, and he looked down at me, trying to reassure me, but I shrugged it off.

_I'm sorry love. Can I help? _I felt how shaken he was, and tried to lend him some support.

_I'm fine, Wildcat, _was all he answered.

He stood, and went over to Ladria, conferring in a low voice. She nodded, and Canderous gestured to me to follow as he gathered up his men. I joined the group, puzzled. He had not let me in on his thoughts, and I couldn't read his face.

"Men," he addressed the six mercs, who were all showing a mix of anger, frustration, and a light of battle. They wanted a piece of the evil that had invaded the ruins of their home world; it was written all over them. "I'm going to ask you all to do something that is harder than taking out the Ravager. I need the six of you to get to Dxun and alert my second where I am, and the situation here. If this mission fails, we need to be prepared to fight. Report everything, including about Jennet, and prepare for our return."

He filled in Dax and the other Mandalorians of the situation as quickly as possible. Their looks were grave. A short silence followed, then Dax spoke up.

"Sir, it sounds like you need every hand you can get. Wouldn't it be better for us to come along?"

"Under other circumstances, you'd be right, and there is nothing I would like better than to have my kin with me in battle, especially this one. I know you all want a chance to revenge yourselves for Malachor V, but this is not the place for it. We were defeated by an honorable foe, and our numbers are decimated. It's a different universe we live in now, and we _will_ survive. What I need from you is to make sure that happens. Go to Dxun, wait for my return. Give us a week, then Jarxel will know what to do. Dax, you're in command." He took Dax aside then, and conferred privately.

_What's up?_

_I'm getting things set for when we get back. We still have the trials, assuming we survive, and I want as much in place as possible._

_Gotcha._

The Mandalorians left, with much saluting and back-slapping and male encouragement. To my surprise, all of them bowed respectfully to me as they headed out. Angus even gave me a "Take care of him, now, lass." with a wink and a pat on the shoulder. I bowed back, smiling.

Dax approached me before he joined his men. He had kept his clan brooch, and Jareth's, and it glinted where it rested on the collar of his shirt. To my utter shock, he hugged me. He was never one to do that, even when we were partners. I hugged back, Canderous not quite glowering in the background.

"I'm glad we've met again, Jennet Jax," he said formally once he'd set me back on my feet. "It's good that we've cleared up our misunderstanding."

"I'm glad too, Dax. I wish things had been different for you."

Dax was tall, even taller than Canderous, and I had to tilt my head back to look at him. His untidy black hair was falling over his forehead, and his blue eyes were serious. He leaned over and murmured in my ear, "That one…is she promised?" I glanced over my shoulder at his nod, and caught a glimpse of Mira's bright head as she talked to Ladria and Atton.

"Not that I know of," I answered, suppressing the smile that wanted to escape. "She can kick your ass in ways I never thought of, you know."

"Yes, she's a worthy fighter," he said thoughtfully.

"And she's a Jedi," I pointed out.

"True. No one's perfect. If the Mandalore can have a jetti trained mate, however…" he let the thought trail off. "Well, I need to go. The Mandalore has asked me to prepare as much as I can for your return, and to vouch for your worthiness as Mate."

"So you're my champion, now?" I asked, teasing.

"Something like that, yes," he said, all seriousness. I blinked.

"Well…thank you," I said, trying not to sound as surprised as I was.

_What the hell?! _I shot at Canderous.

_Just go with it, Wildcat. I'll explain later. Tell him you're honored, and he's worthy._

"Thank you," I said again to Dax. "I'm very honored, and you are a worthy champion."

"It is I who am honored, runi riduur Mandalore," he said simply.

He had just called me the soul mate of the Mandalore. I was surprised, and touched. I thanked him again, trying not to sniffle and ruin it.

"Dax…" I had thought of something. "Canderous mentioned that because we had traveled together, there may be…political issues, and possible…rumors." I felt myself growing red, but needed to know.

Dax looked uncomfortable, but answered readily enough, "Some may…assume. That's why Mandalore appointed me as Champion, partly. But none will doubt your worthiness if I have anything to say about it. Rumors die. No one who sees you two will doubt you are mates." He looked at me, and smiled. "I could wish that it were true; you are worthy of a Mandalorian, and I knew it then. But you are well suited for the Mandalore. I envy him his happiness in you." He paused, and smiled. "Be well, Jennet. See you at Dxun." With a wave, he was gone.

"Safe journey, Dax," I called after him.

Mira wandered over when Dax left, gazing out the door. "Well that was a tall hunk of handsome," she said admiringly.

I lightly elbowed her ribs. "He's Mandalorian. You're Jedi."

"That might change." She mused.

"You're thinking of quitting the Order?" I asked, surprised.

"Oh, no, not that." She looked at me, serious. Her amber eyes were thoughtful. "But the Jedi order is decimated, and they may have a few new rules when they get reorganized. She nodded at Ladria and Atton. "Especially if _they_ have anything to say about it."

"True." I nodded.

"Sure you don't want to become a Jedi?" She asked, a wicked grin on her face.

"I'm just getting used to becoming Mandalorian. Too much on my plate," I said unthinkingly.

"Becoming…Oh my Gods, you're marrying Canderous?" She squealed.

Of course, that's when the room was silent enough to ring her words around it. I blushed furiously, knowing it was too late to hush her. Canderous looked at me, and was smiling. I thought he'd be irritated, we'd agreed not to mention it until the mission was over, but no, he was calm and looked like he'd just cleaned out a room full of Sith single handed.

"Yes." I answered, loudly enough for everyone to hear. Might as well enjoy it, now that the cat was out of the bag. "He asked me just before we left for Telos." I raised my voice, and said generally, "So we better get this thing over with, so you all can be at my wedding!"

_Sorry. I didn't tell her, she just figured it out, honest._

_No problem, Wildcat. I'm proud you're going to be my wife, and everyone here probably all ready figured it out too. It's a bright bunch of people._

He came over to me, and kissed me thoroughly. I felt my toes tingle, and kissed him back. A cheer went up around us, and everyone was babbling congratulations.

"We have something to look forward to," Ladria said, smiling. "Congratulations, Mandalore," She kissed his cheek, then mine. "Jennet." She looked around, and her face grew somber. "I'm sorry to put a damper on the celebration, but we need to discuss some things before we leave."

We gathered again, and Ladria filled us in on the fight with Artis and Darth Nihilus, and what she had learned. We were all quiet. The enormity of what was before us sank in, and we sat there, each of us absorbing its importance.

"Your link with this Kriea," I asked uncertainly. "Forgive me for asking, but what will it do to you if you have to kill her?"

Atton looked up at that, glaring at me briefly. He didn't want to think about it, but someone had to. I gave him a sympathetic look. He relented, and nodded, his face set. We both turned back to Ladria, who was calm and serene as ever.

"I don't know," she said quietly. "It might kill me, too. But it must be done, and I am the one who must do it. I can't make any battle plans; we have no idea what we may face. I do know that Kriea is strong with the dark side, and is highly accomplished with mind tricks. I need you all to be prepared to be manipulated mentally. All we can do is go, and try to mend this rip in the Force."

We all nodded, and filed out of the room. We met Lt. Grenn again, who tried to get us to stay for a while, to honor our part of the battle. Ladria gracefully declined, and we made our way back to the Ebon Hawk. None of us felt much like celebrating, anyway.


	22. Chapter 22

**Canderous**

The flight to Malachor V was tense. Everyone on board was edgy and mostly silent. It's one thing to be gearing for battle; another to be flying in blind to a total unknown. I was wary of dark jetti mind tricks and tried to ask Jennet what we can expect. She had very little useful information.

"I don't know, honestly. I've heard that dark Jedi can trap you in your mind, and make you experience things you'd rather forget. But beyond that…I don't know. And that's mostly a rumor. I tend to think it's more or less true."

"Can you block it?" I asked, concerned.

"I've never had to try," Jennet said seriously. "Like I said, it's only been rumor. I _can_ block a lot of Jedi abilities very well, and shield my own, but…" her voice trailed off. "This is totally unknown."

And totally unhelpful, but it certainly wasn't her fault. I was the only completely unqualified person here as far as combating Jedi ability. But maybe my lack of Force ability will be an asset. I quit thinking about it, and filed away the scant information.

Jennet and Mira prepared food for everyone as we traveled. She said she wasn't very hungry, but needed fuel anyway; might as well feed everyone. I could feel she was somewhat drained from the stim earlier and the mass healing she had done. She firmly blocked any attempt I made to give her my strength, saying she'd be fine with food and a little time.

I could hear her chatting quietly with Mira as they prepped the meals. I tuned in, eavesdropping on the conversation. I heard Dax's name, and gave a start. So, Mira was interested in my former lieutenant? Interesting. I'd caught a look or two Dax had sent Mira's way. I didn't have a problem with it. Our people were few enough, it wouldn't be practical to try to rebuild the population within our own race entirely. There were even less women and children to be found than men – doesn't make for an ideal gene pool.

There had been rumors that some of the women left on the planet had organized evacuations, and had disappeared somewhere in the galaxy. I'd spent a good deal of the last five years tracking down those rumors and finding nothing. Mandalorian women are tough, and resourceful: if some made it out, I had no doubt they were safe. In my case, I knew for certain Gerda had not survived, nor any of my family. Two days after our surrender, I went down myself, and saw them. I'd buried them in the back garden, then escaped the wreckage of my world.

Jennet caught some of that, and made a sympathetic noise in my mind. _I wish that Kriea had chosen anywhere else in the galaxy than there._

_Me too, Wildcat._

Everyone fed and as ready as they'll ever be, we soon made it to Malachor V. As we approached, the klaxon sounded, and the ship started to shake.

Everyone hit high alert as Atton shouted over the comm, _Hang on, we're in a tractor beam! This is going to be rough!_

There was a noise that started low, and grew in intensity; a sort of buzzing, and I suddenly realized it was voices. A high-pitched whine invaded my head, and I clapped my hands over my ears reflexively. It grew until I thought I was going to go mad, and I felt the ship shudder as it seemed to touch down. Everyone was holding their heads and shouting, but no one could hear anyone else, and the voices and whine increased until I passed out.

I woke to silence, on the surface of the planet. I looked around, searching for Jennet, but I was alone. My head felt heavy at first, but I shook it a couple of times and the feeling backed off. I looked around, and saw to my shock I was in front of the ruined remains of my former home.

_How the fuck did I get here?_ I wondered. I reached out for Jennet, but couldn't feel her. I didn't think she was dead, though. I remembered what she said, and tried closing my eyes and imagining myself on board the Ebon Hawk. When I opened my eyes again, I was still in front of the rubble that had been my house. Either this was real, or I couldn't shake off the dark jetti trick.

I heard someone approaching, and whipped out my blaster. From around the corner, a man approached. He was tall, in his early twenties, with electric blue eyes and black hair. He was most definitely Mandalorian, and he was scowling. I considered lowering my weapon, but decided to stay put for now.

"Father?" He asked, glaring at me.

I stared, open-mouthed. "Cardus?" I whispered.

"I thought it was you," he spat at me. "You look just as I remembered. Mother said you'd be back, and you never came. The great General Ordo, who abandoned his family to die."

"This isn't real," I said strongly. "I came back too late, and you were all dead. I buried you myself."

"Don't even recognize your own children? That wasn't me; it was Darius Aeton. I was in the cellar when the bombing started. You didn't even hear me when you came, did you? I was screaming for help, and you didn't hear me. I crawled out five days after the attack, and found other survivors. We've been sending distress calls, but no has come back."

"No, no, no, no," I muttered. "We did come, we searched for survivors, but there weren't many. YOU'RE NOT REAL!" I bellowed, shaking my head.

Cardus just looked at me with loathing. "Still denying us. I expect nothing less from a coward like you."

This wasn't right; I knew it. Cardus was _dead_, I buried him myself. This was a trick, something to keep me here while Kriea did Gods knew what to the rest of my friends. I had to break it, I knew that. I _knew_ it.

But I _wanted_ Cardus to be real. Even hating me, even if it meant I _had_ abandoned him, unknowing, to scrape survival on a dead planet while I lived a decent, even occasionally luxurious, life doing evil things for eviler men, hating myself. I wanted him to be real. Alive, and real.

But he wasn't. I couldn't live a lie, and this was one.

Then I heard Jennet calling me.

_Canderous, love, fight it, it's not real. I'm here. Fight, damn you!_

I looked at Cardus, and smiled. "Good-bye Son. I wish I'd been a better father to you."

I closed my eyes, and felt Jennet shaking me. When I opened them again, I saw her face, full of worry and fear.

"Are you real?" I asked stupidly.

She slapped me, hard.

"Guess so," I mumbled, rubbing my jaw.

"You scared me. Will you stop _doing_ that?" She said fiercely.

"Can't promise anything." I muttered. I was feeling dizzy and felt Jennet give me some strength. The dizziness stopped.

"I need help. Bao Dur and Disciple have come out of it, and they're getting the crew back. Visas is still under, Atton's practically catatonic in the cockpit. And," she drew a deep breath, "Ladria and Mira are gone."

"Gone? How?"

"No idea. But Bao Dur picked up life signs. We all still have our tracers on; he adjusted the computer to its frequency. They're moving, so they're alive. But there's lots of big critters out there, too. We saw the life forms on the scan."

"Where's everyone now?" I was standing, and Jennet started toward the women's dorms. "Visas is back here," she said. "Bao Dur is helping Atton. We've got to check the damage to the ship, and be prepared to fly when we're sure we can get Ladria and Mira back."

She went into the dorm, me at her heels. Visas was moaning and thrashing, obviously still in thrall. Disciple was talking soothingly to her, trying to pull her out. He looked up at Jennet, his eyes wide and troubled.

"I can't get through to her," he said anxiously. "I reach her, a little, and she slips away. I knew she had horrible experiences…" his voice trailed off.

"Let me help," Jennet said.

Disciple gave her an assessing look. "All right. Maybe both of us can manage."

Jennet sat down on the floor, pulling Visas's head into her lap. Placing her fingertips on the other woman's temples, she closed her eyes and started murmuring encouragement, urging her to come back. Disciple joined her, placing his hands just under hers. Visas started to violently shake, and thrash around, almost hitting Jennet. I sat down, motioned to both of them to move, gathered Visas up, and held her tight to stop her from hurting herself. Jennet nodded approval, and went back to trying to help, along with Disciple. The four of us sat there, awkward and cramped in the small space between the bunks, for uncounted minutes. Visas struggled, but I held firm, and Jennet and Disciple continued to talk to her. Gradually, Visas calmed down, and opened her eyes.

Jennet looked at her worriedly. "Do you want to talk about it? Are you okay?"

Visas looked shaken. "Not right now, no. And yes, thank you, I'm fine." She looked up at me and I hurriedly let go of her. She stood up and smiled at me a little shakily.

"Thank you," she said simply.

"No problem."

The three of us headed toward the cockpit. In the common room, Atton and Bao Dur and were just sitting down. Atton looked drawn and pale, his eyes dark and haunted. I expected he was shaken from both his experiences and Ladria's disappearance, as well as Mira's. I knew he'd once been a Jedi hunter; I didn't want to think what he might have relived. Bao Dur looked upset too, but not nearly as bad as Atton or Visas. I wondered what he had seen, and decided I was better off not knowing.

We called up the planet on the table, and found Mira's and Ladria's signals. They were not far from each other and seemed to be moving in the same direction. Bao Dur spoke up.

"I've got an idea," he said slowly. "There's tons of wrecked Republic ships on the planet's surface. From what we can see from the scans, these four," he pointed out four points on the map, "could have their computers reactivated."

"And what will that do?" I asked, puzzled.

"They're Republic ships, as I said. They also have Shadow Generators on board."

I whistled. That was what had destroyed my planet in the first place. I wasn't thrilled with the notion, but if it shut down this threat, I could get behind it. Malachor V was a ghost planet; nothing could help it now. Bao Dur, seeming to sense some of this, looked at me questioningly. I nodded.

"How do we do this?" Visas asked.

"I could send Probe down there to repair and activate the computers. He could evade the creatures easily, and we wouldn't risk the rest of the crew. We might be needed to get the General and Mira out of there. The Generator would have to be activated from the surface anyway; Probe's expendable - we're not."

"Sounds good," Atton said. "Now, what do we do about Mira and Ladria?"

"They both still have their comlinks but the atmosphere here is highly charged; it's blocking their transmissions. I need some time to recalibrate the computers to cut through the static so we can reach them. I'll program Probe first, send him on his way, then try to find a way to reach Mira and the General."

"What can we do to help?" Jennet asked anxiously.

"Anyone with computer experience can help me. I'm going to try and make the whole ship a transmitter/receiver, basically. Everyone else needs to get the ship back up to speed; it's flyable, but barely. It'll shake itself apart the moment we try to leave atmo. Without a way off the planet, we're all dead; that _has _to be our priority. Atton, you, Mandalore, and Disciple start there. Visas, how are you with tools?"

Visas smiled faintly. "I know one from another."

"Fine, you can hand things to the others. Jennet, you have computer experience, yes?"

"Above average. I can hack, and reprogram. I'm not the genius you are, though."

"Well, two sets of eyes are better than one. Come with me."

**Jennet**

I followed Bao Dur to the main computer station, and we got to work. It didn't take too long to get things set up, and we got a faint call from Mira on her comlink. She sounded pissed as hell.

"The fucking evil Jedi witch brought that damn Wookie here! How many times do I have to kill that crazy furry son of a bitch?"

"You okay, Mira?" I asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Little sore," she groused. "Where's the ship?"

We gave her directions to get back and informed her that Ladria, as best we could tell, was heading to a structure somewhere North of Mira's location.

"I'll follow," she said immediately. "She could use help. How far is it?"

"About two klicks. Mira, we're trying to get the ship fixed; we might have to get out of here in a hurry. I don't know if we'll have time to pick up both of you."

Mira swore. "I can't leave her out here, and I am not much help with the ship. If I don't make it, take off without me." She signed off, and Bao Dur sighed.

"I thought she'd do that," he said quietly.

"Yeah, well, I don't like leaving her out there." I scowled. "I should go out; I'm not much help with the ship either."

"No, you won't," Bao Dur said firmly. "If you leave, nothing will keep Canderous here, and he _is_ help with the ship. Mira can take care of herself, and she'll find the General."

I agreed with the logic, but I didn't like it at all. While we had been talking, he had been working on his probe, and shortly, it was ready for release. He sent it out the garage hatch, looking a little lost without his small shadow.

Everyone was racing to get the ship ready, and I appointed myself communications officer, since I wasn't all that good with mechanics. I couldn't reach Ladria at all; she probably lost her comlink sometime after being taken from the ship. Mira was making progress, and had reached the structure we had picked up on scan.

"It seems to be some sort of …" She swore savagely. The girl had a colorful vocabulary, I had to give her that. "It's a Sith academy. Doesn't look like school's in session, though. I'll comm you if I learn anything else." And with that, she switched off. I swore too, and waited impatiently. A half hour later, she came back on.

"I caught a glimpse of Ladria; she headed into an inner chamber and I can't get through the door. I'm looking for another way in."

I waited some more, and her voice came over the speaker. "Nope, everything's sealed, no way in. I'm going to wait here until she comes out."

"You do that." I answered. "We're almost ready here." Visas had come in a moment ago to tell me that Probe was ready to detonate, and the ship was just about ready. "Fifteen minutes, tops," I reported to Mira.

That quarter hour dragged by slow. I refused to look at the clock after the first minute. Finally, I felt the ship start up, and I commed Mira.

"We're on our way!"

"No sign of Ladria…wait! All right, we'll meet you on the East side!"

I hit the general comm gleefully. _Everyone, Ladria's alive and Mira's with her. Head to the East side of the Academy, _I reported happily.

I heard everyone cheer, and Canderous joined me.

"Good work, Wildcat." He kissed me hard.

"You too."

"I didn't do much; Atton and Bao Dur are much better mechanics. But she's running now."

"Yeah, well, neither am I. I'd much rather go kill things than sit and wait and wonder."

"I hear you," he chuckled, and we both headed to the garage to collect our shipmates.

There was no place to land at the Academy. Atton brought the ship as close as he could, and we opened the hatch. Mira jumped first, Canderous and Bao Dur caught her and hauled her in. Ladria leaped lightly, landing gracefully on the ramp. Bao Dur grabbed her quickly; the wind was fierce, buffeting her slight form. Once inside, the hatch slammed shut and we were on our way. Bao Dur gave Probe the command to detonate the Shadow Generator, and we all could feel the impact of the explosion. Canderous closed his eyes as the tremors fell away.

_Good-bye,_ I heard him say silently.


	23. Chapter 23

**Canderous**

The final destruction of my home world shook me more than I could express. Jennet felt it; she was keeping me from actually doing something embarrassing or stupid, like howling or crying. I didn't speak; just went out to the garage and made sure the door was locked. I leaned against the bulkhead and tried to get a hold of myself. A moment of that, and I slammed my fist into it hard enough that I felt a knuckle crack.

The planet was dead; there was no doubt. No life except the perverted animals the Sith had imported; not a single human soul anywhere. Bao Dur had scanned the entire surface carefully when he had searched for Ladria and Mira. I saw it, accepted it, and knew what we had done had saved the galaxy. But it still hurt. My grief was deep, and I felt something break inside.

I heard the door open, and felt Jennet come in. She had picked the lock. Carefully making sure it was sealed behind her, she walked up behind me and slid her arms around my waist. Her head barely touched my shoulder blades. She didn't say anything, or try to read my thoughts. She just hugged me, and leaned against my back. I felt a warmth, and my hand stopped hurting. I flexed it, and felt something else break free. I knew that my planet was gone, and I could live with it. My family were at rest, and I had a new future.

I turned around, and gathered my wildcat in my arms. She snuggled back, wordless, just giving me herself. I relaxed very gradually, and finally, I bent and kissed her.

"I'm all right, Wildcat."

"I know…now." She looked up at me. "I wasn't trying to listen, but you were so upset I couldn't help but hear. 'I'm sorry' just isn't adequate."

"It's all right. Really. It died fifteen years ago, today was just the burial. In more ways than one." My voice was regretful, but steady.

"So what now?" She asked, brown eyes grave and watchful.

"Now…we go in the common room, and find out how Ladria kicked Kriea's ass. Then we plan for a wedding." I kissed her again, and wished we had time and privacy to celebrate our successful mission more personally.

"I love you, ti kar'ta," Jennet said softly.

"I love you too, cyar'ika." I kissed her once more, this time more deeply. She sighed, kissing me back.

Before things got out of hand, I regretfully put her down and led her to the common room. Everyone was there, chatting and laughing. They stopped as they saw me, and I gave them all a tight smile.

"I'm okay," I said gruffly, and sat down, Jennet on my lap. I needed to touch her. She didn't mind, and snuggled shamelessly. I remembered the first day we'd met, when I was so angry with her for throwing the fight, and how I'd held her for hours on my lap until she told me why. She had felt so good, and even better now. She had liked being there even then, and I smiled at the memory. I rested my chin on the top of her head, and listened as Ladria told us of Darth Traya's, whom we had known as Kriea, death.

We were all quiet when she finished her story. It seemed a sudden end to such a big threat, and we were all a bit doubtful it was really over.

"What of the rip in the Force?" asked Bao Dur quietly.

"It is mended, for now," Ladria said softly. "It isn't over, really. The Sith are out there, and need to be fought. But the biggest threat is gone."

"What now?" Atton asked.

"Now," Ladria smiled brightly, "We have a wedding to attend."

Everyone looked at Jennet and me, and laughed.

"True," I said. "But it's going to be a while before we get there. We have tests first, and that can take some time, I think. If you're all not busy for a month or so, Jennet would appreciate the company. And I would, too," I added gruffly.

"I don't have anything on my calendar," Atton said easily. "Last appointment was 'save the galaxy'. Done with that."

"I'd love to hang with you guys for a while," Mira said. "Not like I have better plans."

Jennet smiled wickedly. "I think you just want to see some more Mandalorian scenery."

Mira pretended to throw a glass at Jennet, and they both laughed.

Visas spoke. "I would love to celebrate with Jennet and Canderous," she said in her soft voice. Jennet had not bothered to call me anything else since our first talk, and the crew had begun to follow her habit. "We all could use a celebration."

"I agree," said Bao Dur, and Disciple nodded as well. I was surprised at that; I thought he'd be panting to go off and catalog the Jedi archives. He didn't seem to like me all that well; maybe he was just fond of Jennet.

"Thanks, everybody," Jennet said, her eyes bright. "It wouldn't be right if you all weren't there."

"You know what I could use?" I asked. Jennet quirked an eyebrow at me, twisting her head to look at my face.

"What?"

"A drink," I answered. "I've wondered, with your metabolism, how much you can put away. Want to find out?"

She grinned. "You're on."

Atton laughed. "I got a hundred credits that says she puts you under the table."

Mira jumped in. "I'll referee."

Ladria laughed, and we all looked around at the sound. She seemed younger than yesterday; more the young woman I knew she was than the quiet grave Exile with the universe on her shoulders. There was still responsibility weighing on her, but the load was much lighter, and it looked good on her. "This I have to see," she said delightedly.

Visas looked a little taken aback, but game to watch. Bao Dur just sat back, looking serene and happy. Disciple, rather than disapproving as I had expected, looked interested.

"Jennet, I'd really like to run some tests on you one day. With Canderous's approval, of course," he added hastily at my look.

"Canderous doesn't approve what I do," Jennet said. "He's my mate, not my keeper. But I'm not big on being a lab rat."

Disciple's face fell, but he said courteously, "Of course. I didn't mean to offend."

"I'm not offended. Tell you what, I promise I'll answer whatever questions you have, and if the tests seem reasonable, I'll consider them."

"Deal," he said, brightening. He stuck out his hand, and she took it. He bowed over her hand and asked, "So how does this drinking game work?"

"Well," Mira said brightly, "We get a bottle of …well, what do we have?"

Atton hopped up and went into the galley. "Six bottles of Tatooine firewhiskey, two of Juma Juice, and one unidentifiable thing that smells like rotten kolto."

"I'd just as soon skip the rotten kolto stuff," Jennet called. "Make it whiskey."

"Okay, whiskey then," Mira said. "Get two glasses…"

"Eight," Jennet interjected. "Everyone has at least one drink; we just saved the galaxy, fer Gods' sake!"

"Eight," Mira agreed. "But we didn't, really, it was Ladria."

"Not me," protested our leader. "I did what was needed, that's all. If you all hadn't repaired the ship, and activated the Shadow Generators, what I did probably wouldn't have made a difference. And if Mira hadn't followed me, I'd be dead."

"Thanks the Gods she did," said Atton feverently. He was looking at her the way I looked at Jennet, and I was glad for them. Ladria was a truely good person, and Atton was too, as much as a pain in the ass he could be.

"It was all of us, then," Mira amended. "I guess; I don't really feel like I did much."

There was a general muttering of agreement, and Ladria glared at all of us.

"You all gave me the hope that things could be changed, that _I _could change. Don't you _dare_ think any of you weren't a part of this!" she said firecely, as close to shouting as I'd ever heard her.

All of us stared at her, open-mouthed. Ladria never yells.

"Well," said Jennet after a moment, "We did our part, yes? I mean, I wasn't here for most of it, true. But I feel pretty damn good right now."

"We all were a part of this," Bao Dur said firmly. "So says the General. Who am I to argue?" he smiled, and everyone smiled back.

"Let's just shut up now, and celebrate," Mira said, and poured around, raising her glass. Everyone followed suit.

"To saving the galaxy," She said.

"To saving the galaxy," we echoed, and drank. I drank mine off, and Jennet did too.

"That's one," she said, smiling. "Now let me sit in a chair, there's more than one way to kick your ass."

Chuckling, I allowed her to slide off my lap and sit across from me. She grinned, and Mira poured out two more glasses.

"We only have six bottles of whiskey," Ladria said thoughtfully. "I'm not sure that's enough, if I'm joining in."

We all looked at her, open-mouthed, except Bao Dur, who was laughing. We all looked from her to him, and finally Jennet asked, "All right, I'll bite. What's so funny?"

"Nothing," said the big Iridonian. "Everything."

"Great answer," Jennet said, laughing herself. "Or non-answer. Come on, give."

"The General, here," chuckled Bao Dur, "Can out drink all of you, hands down. I've never seen her even tipsy. And," he added, "I _have_ seen her drink."

I looked at Ladria with respect. "That's quite a testimonial. Zabrak are known for holding their liquor."

"Well," Atton observed, "after the first ten, the rotten kolto stuff will taste just fine. Mira, as referee, I think you should declare the rules, and the competitors."

Visas spoke up. "I'm in."

The night was just full of surprises.

_Now if we can just get Disciple to join, it'd be perfect,_ Jennet said silently.

_Disciple, why?_

_Oh, I just had a fleeting thought a while back about how he and Visas needed most to wake up with a hangover. I think it was actually 'wake up in a strange place, naked, with an agonizing headache and blackmail material in their friend's datapads'._

I almost laughed out loud at that, especially when Disciple announced he was game at that moment.

Mira counted, "So we've got Jennet, Canderous, Ladria, Disciple, and Visas. Bao Dur?"

"How about I referee, so you can join? I know you want to," he said easily. "Whiskey never did agree with me."

"Fine by me. Atton?"

"I'll join a round or two, but I know when I'm beat before I start. That bet is still on, though," he said, looking at me, a huge grin on his face. "My money is on Jennet. But I'll bet another hundred Ladria will out drink both of you."

"You're on," Jennet said happily, and I echoed. Actually, I thought he'd probably win, but I didn't care. We'd won our battle, and we'd earned it.

"Bao Dur, rules please?" Atton turned to the Iridonian. "Seems we're going to be the only relatively sober people on board."

"Rules: Everyone drinks at the same time, no sipping. You're out if you pass out, fall off your chair, or declare yourself done." Bao Dur looked around, and everyone nodded. "All right, everyone playing gather 'round."

We crowded around the table, with Atton and Bao Dur in chairs nearby, the whiskey bottle in one blue hand. He poured ceremoniously, and said "Drink!"

Everyone tossed down the whiskey, and the game was on. Visas, astonishingly, got _giggly_ after her third, and bowed out. I figured Disciple would stop after five, but hung in through seven. He had a dreamy look on his face, said "This is really quite…pleasant…" and fell off his chair. Everyone roared with laughter, and Atton helped him up on to the couch. Disciple was still conscious though, I gave him that. Mira held up for ten, then took herself out. She was pretty drunk, but not out of control; I was impressed. I took two more, then decided to watch Ladria and Jennet.

"You've won, Rand," I said, and handed him my credits.

"Aw, man, I wanted to see you pass out," he griped. I gave him a good glower, and he laughed.

"I really do want to see how much Jennet can drink," I said easily. "While I'm sober enough to remember."

They made it to fourteen before Jennet started slurring when she talked. She motioned me over, and I leaned down to kiss her. She got very enthusiastic; Bao Dur had to clear his throat twice before she remembered her next drink. I backed off, and looked over at Ladria. She hardly seemed affected at all.

"I'm impressed," I said sincerely. She smiled. "What's your secret?"

"That would be telling," she said, still smiling.

"Sort of the point, don't you think?" Atton broke in. "How do you do it? I'd have dropped at least two drinks ago."

"Combination of Jedi and officer training; you have to be alert at all times," is all she would say.

Jennet suddenly sat straighter. I felt her healing go off; and her voice in my head was clearer.

_She's a healer too, _I heard her say.

_You're sober? _I thought, incredulously.

_Mostly. I can get drunk; it's just a matter of letting myself. But I really don't want to be shit faced; I'd rather go to the garage with you and celebrate._

_Sounds like a plan, _I rumbled.

"I'm out," Jennet announced, with a convincing slur. "I bow to the Queen; she's unbeatable." She stood up, made a theatrical bow with a credible stagger. Ladria laughed, but I caught a look of understanding that passed between them. I put my arm around Jennet.

"Let's go to bed, Wildcat," I said, and we said good night all around.


	24. Chapter 24

**Jennet**

Canderous had set up a bed in the garage. It was colder than the dorms, but he was always warm, and cold is very conducive to snuggling. It also offered privacy, and a locked door; two things that are in short supply on a relatively small ship with eight people. I'd noticed that even though there were eight bunks and one very small private cabin that Ladria used, several of the crew chose to sleep elsewhere. Bao Dur was usually in the engine room; I'd asked once and he said he could sleep better listening to the ship. Mira liked the cargo hold, and Atton seemed to mostly sleep in the cockpit. Only Visas and Disciple used the dorms regularly, after my first night on board.

Canderous had moved his footlocker into the garage too, and I'd transferred my few belongings and clothing to it. It made a nice low table if we wanted to get away for a bit and eat privately. Not that we'd really had any time to. But now that the mission was over, we did have time to spend together. We would arrive at Dxun tomorrow, and from there I wasn't sure what the arrangements would be.

_Well, they'll have a hard time making me take my own room,_ I thought.

_No one's going to make you, Wildcat. We're not prudish people, and I'm the Mandalore, after all. Who's going to tell _me _who I can sleep with?_

_Isn't that what this whole mate thing is about? Telling you it's okay to sleep with me? _I half-teased.

_Oh, they wouldn't care if you were just my mistress; they'd only object if I wanted to marry you without being my mate._

I stopped undressing at that. He was serious; I could tell. I shrugged, and let it go; I _was_ his mate; the entire concept was moot anyway. And he had managed to down quite a lot of whiskey, although you could hardly tell.

"You're drunk," I informed him, smiling.

"A bit," he agreed. "Come here."

He was lying on the makeshift bed, constructed of two bunk mattresses and several blankets and pillows. He'd gotten his boots and socks off, and had his hands behind his head, the picture of blissful contentment. I grinned, and he smiled lopsidedly back.

"Do you know you're cute when you're hammered?" I asked.

"I," he said with dignity, "am not _cute._ You, on the other hand, are. Come _here_."

I complied, and he kissed me ferociously. His hands immediately started wandering everywhere, tugging at my clothes impatiently. I helped him along, not really wanting to lose yet another piece of my small wardrobe. His tongue started doing interesting things to my right ear and I shivered. I felt his hands fumbling at my pants and I pulled away long enough to yank them off.

"What's this, then?" he asked as his hands found nothing but me. "Or, rather, what's _not_ this?"

"Just being prepared," I said, laughing. I had not worn any underwear, with some vague idea of whispering it to him at some opportune moment. I had not had such a moment, and he apparently hadn't picked it up.

"You are genius," he said freverently. "Grand idea; do it all the time."

His lips clamped down on a sensitive spot and I groaned. Really, it's just not fair that he's so good at that. Just the right amount of pressure and teeth. Oh my. One hand was caressing the other breast, the other was exploring much lower. Mmmmmmmm.

"You know, I was going to take your drunk away and spare you a hangover. But I think I like you this way; so sorry, you get to suffer." I teased, exploring his broad chest and kissing him where I knew it would make him shiver.

_You can do that?_ His mouth was busy, so he said it in my head.

_Sure. It's no harder than the stim; they're both a sort of poison after all._

_It's not the stim that's hard right now._

_Prove it._

Oh, and did he ever.

Afterward, he propped himself on his elbows, and looked at me full in the face. His eyes were almost soft, but still an intense blue, like the summer sky just before lightning strikes. His smile was almost dreamy.

"I love you, Jennet," he said softly. "Have I said it today?"

"I love you, Canderous," I answered. "Yes. That's twice. Three times, and it's true."

"I love you." 

"I love you too."

His mind was drifting, but I heard it.

_It's always been true._

I covered us up, and fell asleep, curled up next to his warmth.

I woke the next morning alone. I got my robe out of the footlocker, grabbed some clothes, and headed to the 'fresher. Luckily, there was no one around so I didn't have to wait. I took a quick shower, brushed my teeth and dressed. I tossed my dirty clothes and robe into the laundry recycle and headed to the common area.

The scene was hysterical. Visas and Disciple were jumbled together on the couch like a couple of Gizka pups, sound asleep. Bao Dur was seated at the table with Canderous, and they were both chuckling. Canderous didn't look any worse for wear, and had a cup of coffee in his hand, with a half-eaten plate of breakfast in front of him. I kissed Canderous good morning, which he returned enthusiastically, smiled at Bao Dur, and wandered down the short corridor to the cockpit. Atton was there, awake and bright eyed. He grinned and waved to me.

"We're about an hour from Dxun," he informed me.

"Good deal," I smiled, and went back to the common room.

I headed to the galley and helped myself to breakfast and coffee. Seating myself next to Canderous, I asked generally, "How's everyone this morning?"

"Well," Bao Dur said reflectively, "Mira's dead to the world in the cargo hold, and Ladria hasn't come out of her cabin yet, but I think she's awake. We're considering carrying Visas back to the dorm and spare her some embarrassment."

"That would be kind," I said. I was two minds about it; I liked her and didn't want her to feel awkward around anyone. But on the other hand, a little embarrassment is generally good for you.

Atton joined us from the cockpit. "Oh, don't worry," he said, nodding to the sleeping beauties, "I got holos."

"In that case, go ahead and put her in her bunk." I gave a wicked smile, and applied myself to breakfast.

Bao Dur got up, and gently picked Visas up as if she weighed nothing. He disappeared down the corridor, and returned shortly.

"Didn't even twitch," he said, chuckling.

"We'll be at Dxun in an hour," I said. "I'd hate to arrive with half the crew out of it."

"Don't worry; we can stay in orbit until everyone is ready to go." Atton assured me.

"That would be fine," Canderous interjected. "We're in no hurry, and I can contact my base to let them know we're arriving."

I was more worried about the trials than I had thought; my stomach was clenching now. I tried to shake it off. Canderous looked at me, knowing my thoughts.

_It's going to be fine, Wildcat. Nothing to be nervous about._

_Easy for you to say; you're not getting an entire tribe of in-laws._

_True. You've already won over Dax and the others we picked up on Telos. What's a few more?_

_How few?_

_When I left, there were about a hundred warriors at the camp. There's about five thousand I know about, scattered around. We estimate somewhere around triple that are alive, whereabouts unknown._

I didn't have any idea how he knew that, but was too nervous to ask.

"How is this going to work?" I asked. I've always felt having enough information dispels fear. I'm not always right, but it's a sound principle. "Do we just walk in, announce we're mates, and let them sort it out?"

"Well…something like that, I think," Canderous hedged.

"What do you mean, you _think_?" I asked, rather sharply.

"I told you I don't know much about it," Canderous growled.

I sighed. "So you did. Sorry. Well, what do you know?"

"Usually, the Elders handle this. As we don't have any, I'm not sure. I expect Jarxel and the others will come up with something, with our help, to prove it." Canderous sounded thoughtful. "I have a few ideas of my own that should convince my people."

"Such as?" I asked, eyebrow raised.

"The most common signs of mate are sharing battle ecstasy and thoughts, sensing each other, and sharing strength. We could prove the at least two of those easily enough." Canderous looked at me, and I nodded.

"It wouldn't take much, just separate us and prove we can talk to each other." I agreed.

"The battle ecstasy would have to be proven through combat," he continued, "but an experienced warrior could tell if you were feeding off mine, and vice versa. Sensing each other could be proved; it would just take the right test, but it could be done. Sharing strength would be trickier. Might need a medical lab, which we don't have on Dxun."

"Maybe if we can pass the other tests, they'll let that one slide," I said hopefully.

"Maybe," Canderous agreed, but he sounded doubtful. He smiled, and kissed me. "You worry too much, Wildcat," he said.

"Probably," I answered, and tried not to.

Atton's voice came over the general comm. _Fifteen minutes from Dxun orbit. Let me know when you want to land._

"We're close enough for me to contact Jarxel; let me go see what they've prepared. They probably want to know I've survived, in any case," Canderous said.

"Can I listen in?" I asked.

"Sure."

I followed Canderous to the main computer terminal, and he punched up the frequency for the base on Dxun. After a few minutes, the weathered face of a man in his late forties or early fifties came on the screen.

"Jarxel," Canderous said. "Good to see you, friend."

"Mandalore." Jarxel acknowledged formally. Then his craggy face broke into a grin. "Glad to see you alive, Canderous."

"Glad to be alive," Canderous answered. "Report."

"We have good news," Jarxel said. "Three weeks ago, we got word of a colony of Mandalorian women, Elders, and children, now young men and women, that had escaped the destruction of our home world. I sent some of our men to check on it, and it panned out. A party of Elders and survivors arrived two days ago."

"Fantastic!" Canderous grinned. "How many?"

"Twelve in the party, including three Elders. Just over five hundred, total, including births in the last fifteen years."

"Best news I've heard in years. Have you told the Elders about Jennet? And did Dax and his party arrive?"

"Yes to both." Canderous grinned at me, and I smiled back.

Jarxel continued, "The Elders are willing to test you. But Canderous…" his voice sounded grim. "There's a complication."

"A complication?" Canderous scowled. "What complication?"

"The Elders said they've found your wife," Jarxel said reluctantly.


	25. Chapter 25

"What?!" Canderous shouted. "Gerda's _dead_, I buried her, I saw her! There's no way she's alive!"

I stared at the grim face of Jarxel, then at Canderous. I knew he believed Gerda dead, but could there be a mistake? I didn't think so. He'd told me what he'd seen when Kreia had us in thrall, and I'd seen a good deal of it while he had been under, while I was trying to pull him out. I knew what the truth was. I couldn't believe he was wrong. Moreover, I could hear his total shock in my head; he wasn't trying to block me. The link doesn't mean we instantly know everything about each other, but he couldn't possibly fake this. What was going on here? I felt my stomach flop, but put a hand on Canderous's arm in reassurance. He reached with his other hand and squeezed mine.

"Not Gerda," Jarxel said flatly. "Cressa."

Canderous sat back in his chair suddenly, like a marionette that had its strings cut. "Cressa?" he said blankly.

"She was with the colony. Gods know how she found it when we didn't, but she claims she's your wife." Jarxel said, almost apologetically. "The Elders object to an outlander wife of the Mandalore, and are willing to listen to her."

"I never married her, and I haven't seen her in more than twelve years. I was with her for less than a year, for fuck's sake!" Canderous bellowed.

"I know that, and so do most of the men here. But that's what the Elders and Cressa claim." He seemed to focus on me, and gave me a gruff smile. "You must be Jennet, yes?"

I had been looking back and forth between them, feeling Canderous's rage and frustration over this unknown woman. I knew he was telling the truth; that wasn't in question. What I didn't know was what would happen because of her claims. Well, can't do anything about it right now anyway. I tried to smile back at the vidscreen.

"Yes," I said. "Nice to meet you, Jarxel."

"Dax has sung your praises since he got here," Jarxel said, not smiling, but not frowning or scowling, either. "I hope what he says about you is true."

"I hope so, too." I answered ruefully. "Depends on what he's said."

"If half of what he's told me is true, I'm looking forward to meeting you," was all Jarxel would say.

Great. Well, Dax is my Champion, I suppose he'll say nice things about me. What a Mandalorian considers nice is another story. I just smiled noncommittally, and shrugged.

"Look, Jarxel, we're ten minutes or so from orbit, a few hours from landing. What was the plan for our arrival?" Canderous cut in.

"Well, with the Elders here, there was going to be an honor guard, and formal greeting at the camp."

"Skip the guard, and don't tell anyone we're coming yet. You alone right now?"

"Yes."

"Good. Get Dax, and join us in three hours at the usual landing site. Say it's a hunting party, whatever…just make sure no one from the Elders or Cressa gets wind of it. I need information before I hit the camp, and I don't want to discuss it over vidlink."

"Yes, Mandalore."

"Jarxel, you've known me my whole damn life. You only call me Mandalore in private now when there's something up. Spit it out."

"All right," Jarxel's craggy face was set in a scowl. "I think you're wrong about the honor guard. You should have one; it shows strength in the face of the enemy. But _I _pick it; I can make sure you're escorted by men loyal to you that can keep their mouths shut. And there's no rule about how long it takes you to get to camp. If there's any question, you simply say you insisted on a briefing before the ceremonies."

"Excellent. I knew I left you in charge for a reason. See you in three hours. Canderous out." He switched off with a savage jab at the button.

He turned to me, face set and angry. "The bitch means trouble. I'm sorry, Wildcat. This is going to be tougher than I thought."

"I'm not sure you have anything to apologize for. But I would like to know what's going on," I said honestly. I wasn't mad at him; he was obviously as thrown at this as I was. But some explanations were needed.

"And you will. But I'd like to save my breath and only do it once, if that's all right. We need to get the crew up and ready to talk strategy as soon as Jarxel gets to us."

"Can you at least tell me who this Cressa is, and what she was to you?" I asked irritably.

I had faith in him, but was a bit irked he didn't just start explaining right away. He looked at me, his face a bit wary.

_I'm telling the truth._

_I know, you idiot, _I answered tartly.

He sighed. "All right, edited version. Cressa was a soldier during the war; she was a good one, too, and young, barely eighteen. She went mercenary after, like a lot of us. I ran into her about two years later, and we hooked up. I was working for some pretty slimy people then, and wasn't interested in anything permanent. She was, and took exception to my attitude. She left, not happily, and I haven't seen her since."

"Great. A woman scored. Just what we need," I muttered.

"Exactly. Let's get the crew together; we need every brain to pick we can get."

Most everyone was awake now. Mira staggered in just a few minutes after we got to the common room, looking grumpy. I sent her some healing, and she looked around, spotted me, and smiled.

"Thanks. Only you would think to use healing for a hangover," she said ruefully. "Gods, I can't wait 'til I can do that."

"Not just me," I said, smiling, and nodding around the room. Disciple, who had been dead to the world a half hour ago, looked bright and fresh, not a hair out of place. Visas was as cool and composed as ever. "I'm just nice enough to share."

"Sadists, the lot," muttered Mira. "Jedi just love to make a lesson out of everything."

She wandered into the galley for coffee. Once everyone was assembled, Canderous gave a brief summary of his conversation with Jarxel. There was a moment of stunned silence. I could tell it had taken Canderous a huge effort to admit to being in a bind, especially such a personal one, let alone ask for any help. For once Atton didn't offer any smart comments. Finally, Ladria spoke.

"I don't think there's much we can offer until Jarxel gets here and we hear what's going on in your camp. It would help if we understood how this Cressa could claim she was your wife, and what proof she would offer." She said quietly.

Canderous appeared to be thinking about that, and ran his hand through his hair and down his face. "There would have to be a contract. Anything she had would be forged, of course, but she could do that easily enough. Witnesses would help too, but as far as I know, no other Mandalorians were around when we were involved. I'm absolutely certain she didn't bear me a child. That would serve as proof as well."

"How can you be certain?" Ladria asked sharply.

"This I want to hear," Atton chortled.

Canderous sent him a filthy look. "Because I had a sterility procedure done just before I met her. It's reversible, of course, but I'm not one to leave a responsibility behind. I wasn't interested in that sort of problem at the time," he growled. "Anything else you want to know, Rand?"

"Did she know about that?" Atton asked promptly.

"I don't think so."

"Got the medical records to back that up?"

"Yes."

"They could be faked, as well."

"True. But a check in the records at the hospital on Nar Shadaa would prove it. You got something to say?"

"Just trying to cover your bases, pal." Atton said. "I'm on your side. If nothing else, believe I want Jennet happy, and for some odd reason, you seem to do that."

Canderous quit glowering, mostly, at that. "Thanks," he said, grudgingly.

_You didn't tell me you were sterile reversible, _I thought crankily.

_It never came up, _he said honestly. _You didn't seem worried about getting pregnant, and I meant to ask about that; but I knew you couldn't from me unless I had the procedure reversed._

_I'm not worried because I won't get pregnant until I want to. Part of the nice side benefits of being an advanced healer and Jedi trained._

_One day you'll have to explain that in detail._

_It's simple. I can flush foreign substances out of my body, and reverse any physical thing done to me, pretty much. If the damage is very great, I can't overcome everything. But getting pregnant…semen is a foreign substance, I simply kill it before it takes; and keep my body in a state of non-receptiveness. It's almost unconscious now. Not that I've had many opportunities to worry about it. But I _am_ a female warrior; rape is always a concern. I've never wanted to have a child not of my choosing, so I learned early to prevent it._

_Makes sense. But what part of 'one day' was unclear?_

_Oh shut up, _and I elbowed him. I was pleased to see he could joke again, though.

Disciple, who had been silent until now, spoke up. "You said there would be a contract?"

Canderous looked surprised. "Yes."

"Would it be a Mandalorian one, or a Galactic standard?" His voice was thoughtful.

"Galactic. She couldn't claim a Mandalorian, the ceremony would have to be performed among our people. I wouldn't put it past her to try and persuade some of our people to lie about it, but Mandalorians are stubborn, and not easily charmed or bullied."

"If it's Galactic, I could probably prove it false," Disciple said firmly.

"You could?" Canderous said, nonplussed.

"I've spent most of my life in archives; of course I can discern false documents. It would likely be quite obvious to a trained archivist." Disciple said confidently.

"You'd do that for me?" Canderous said wonderingly.

"Of course," Disciple said, surprised. "You're family. And I despise liars," he added with a scowl. "Why should this loathsome woman get away with making people I care about miserable?"

"I…" Canderous seemed completely bewildered. "Thanks," he said finally, his voice almost hoarse. He offered his hand to Disciple, who shook it firmly.

"It's nothing," he said, and I could tell he meant it. I hopped up and kissed his cheek.

"Thank you," I said, smiling. Amazingly, he blushed.

"I'm quite fond of you and Canderous," he said shyly. "Whatever I can do to help."


	26. Chapter 26

Author's note: Thanks everyone for the comments; I really enjoy feedback. I'm glad people seem to be enjoying the story :0) Please continue to ready and review! Thanks, LJ

* * *

We broke up the council so everyone could be ready when we landed, and Atton returned to the cockpit. Ladria, Bao Dur, Canderous and I stayed in the common room, talking.

"What can you tell us of your society structure?" Ladria asked, leaning forward with an interested look on her face.

"It's pretty simple, actually. Of course, it's been totally shattered for the last fifteen years. But basically, we have a military structure: the Mandalore is the supreme head, and everyone has a sort of rank. Women who don't fight, or can't because of pregnancy or other reasons, are often camp followers during campaign, supporting the troops, and their spouse. I never let Gerda follow the army, she was a good fighter as all Mandalorians are trained, but didn't care to be a soldier, and I wanted the children out of it. She agreed, after about ten hours of arguing. Now I wish in a way I hadn't been adamant about it; she might have lived if she'd been with me. But then, I wouldn't have met Jennet."

He smiled at me, and I smiled back. I understood. I also noticed he was talking more than he ever did, and about far more personal things. He obviously trusted Ladria and Bao Dur more than he let on; I was sure he felt that way about most of the crew, as well. I refrained from comment, and let him continue.

"The Elders are our spiritual guides, and are another ruling body. They have power over the entire society, including within limits the Mandalore. They often are the ones to choose when to fight, or where to go, but leave the actual strategy and battle to the Mandalore and the army. We consult, but don't always follow their advice." He grimaced. "Usually when we don't, it doesn't go well."

"Do you have Seers?" Ladria asked.

"Very rarely. It's almost as rare as true mates. When one does crop up, they're honored, but often feared as well. They automatically become part of the Elders, regardless of age."

"How do you become an Elder? Is it automatic at a certain age?" Bao Dur asked with interest.

"No. Elders are elected by other Elders. You can't become one, unless you're a Seer, until at least your eightieth year. We're a long-lived race; it's not unusual to live to 150 or so. 120 is about average, if not killed in campaign."

"Interesting," Bao Dur said sincerely.

"How, exactly, did you get involved with this Cressa, and what happened to make her leave?" I asked suddenly.

We hadn't covered that, and I thought it would be good for at least Ladria and Bao Dur to know. The more information, the better to combat it, and we were asking for their help. Jarxel, I assumed, already knew, or guessed; it would be best for both camps to know the full story. I didn't want to put him on the spot, but figured it was better that than his friends being in the dark. I sent him a silent explanation, and he sent back his resigned acknowledgement.

"Well," he said slowly, trying to find words, "I was working for an Exchange boss in the Outer Rim, and had gone to Nar Shadaa for him on business. Cressa was there, looking for bounties, when I went to the head of the Exchange for a meeting. Go-To wasn't boss then; it was a man named Cyrus Axel. I recognized her, of course, and we agreed to meet for drinks to catch up later." He grimaced. "I hadn't liked her a whole lot when she was in the army; she was ambitious even then, and often insubordinate. I had a lot of complaints from her commanders during the war. But she was the first Mandalorian woman I had met in nearly two years, and I guess…I was homesick."

It cost him to admit it. I refrained from patting his shoulder, or showing any sympathy outwardly; it would make things worse. I settled for mental show of encouragement and he responded rather gruffly, but gratefully.

"We had a few drinks, and she wheedled me into an introduction to my boss. I took her along when I returned, and she proved useful. It took her a month to get me in her bed; I really wasn't all that interested, but she persisted, and played on the kinship of race. She could do tough-but-vulnerable very well, I discovered later."

_Was she good in bed? _I couldn't help it, the thought just popped into my head.

_Yes. _His answer was simple, but grudging. _But she was very practiced, and selfish. I've learned better since then._

I was glad he hadn't made an outright comparison, and knew his assessment was honest. I glowed a bit, the fact that he hadn't bothered to compare meant he didn't feel he had to; he trusted me to know there wasn't one.

"She was convenient, made it clear she was available, and I was lazy. I made it clear to her it was an arrangement, not a commitment, and she seemed to be content with that. I discovered early she was a completely self-centered bitch that would do or say anything to get ahead. I wasn't much better, but I was honest, and didn't care for her manipulations. She wormed her way up the chain, partly by sleeping her way there, and charming anyone who might be useful." His face was dark with remembering.

"She ended up with your boss, didn't she?" Ladria asked shrewdly. I was glad; kept me from asking. Bao Dur nodded, as if he had come to the same conclusion.

"Oh yeah. I was only a matter of time; she's very beautiful outwardly, and can be charming, if she chooses. Combine that with her fighting skills and complete lack of morals, it can be deadly; to a certain sort of person, it's irresistible." Canderous grimaced. "I honestly didn't give a shit who she slept with; it took her six months to snag Edmand Garr, my boss, and I knew perfectly well before that she only kept me on retainer, so to speak. I was using her as well; seemed a fair trade. I did quit sleeping with her when she was with Garr; it's never a good idea to be in competition with your boss, and it was a good excuse to stop without making her a complete enemy. I wasn't a good person then, not sure I am now, even. But I did have honesty and some loyalty; when I got wind that she was involved in an assassination plot against Garr, I confronted her."

"Why would she do that?" I asked, surprised. "Isn't that biting the hand that fed her?"

"She wanted permanence, a place. She didn't care where, as long as there was power, and plenty of credits, and Garr had both. But he wasn't a stupid man, he knew she couldn't really be trusted, and kept her dangling for another six months. She got impatient, and decided to kill him, stealing what she could in the process. I heard about it from the poor slob she convinced to help her. I'd had my suspicions, got him drunk, and he spilled. Didn't even take too many threats; by that time, he was terrified of Cressa, and pretty sure she meant to make him the scapegoat. Which meant he'd be dead, too, even if the attempt succeeded - whoever took over would kill him out of hand. I paid him to disappear. Garr was away on business at the time."

"That was generous of you," Bao Dur said quietly.

Canderous looked at him sharply, but there was no sarcasm in the Iridonian's tone or face.

"I don't kill people for being stupid," Canderous said gruffly. "He was basically a good kid, just naïve, and Cressa is difficult to see through even when you're not young and a moron. Garr would have seen him dead; I didn't agree that was necessary. And I felt responsible; I'd brought that viper into our midst to begin with." He sighed. "None of the people involved could be classified decent human beings, including me. I didn't really feel guilty for bringing Cressa into the organization; they were all corrupt adults with a knack for survival. I did feel bad for Brinks, though; he was just young, and lost. I gave him credits, and poured him onto a ship. He was pretty smart, and I gave him the best chance I could."

"So the permanence you spoke of earlier was Garr, not you." I said. Canderous nodded. "And the attitude she objected to was you trying to keep her claws out of your boss?"

"Something like that. I didn't care much if she fleeced him, although I probably would have put a stop to that too. But I did care who she might hurt or what she might do if she did get the power she was after."

"So you got Brinks away, then you confronted Cressa," I prompted.

"Yes. She tried to pretend she didn't know what I was talking about. I'd taken her out of the area, pretending to want to resume our relationship. She was Garr's personal assassin by then, and I was pretty high up too. I gave her a choice – disappear, or I would turn her in to Garr. She didn't believe me, at first. But she did know that if I carried through my threat, it would be me that killed her."

_You were Garr's second, weren't you? _I asked silently. I was pretty sure Ladria and Bao Dur had figured that too, but they were tactfully not asking.

_Yes._

I could feel the shame in him, and I wanted to take that away. I knew from the start he'd done terrible things, and not just in war. He wasn't making excuses for himself; just being straightforward about what sort of person he'd been. He trusted me enough not to try and make himself look better, and had honor enough to admit his faults. I sent him a flash of understanding. He didn't relax much, but I could tell he appreciated it.

His face was utterly blank as he continued his story. "Cressa was a good fighter, and a dirty one, but she knew I could beat her, and I would likely just kill her then and spare me the trouble. I'd already come up with a story that didn't involve Brinks, and was going to explain his disappearance by saying he went home, and had asked for permission from me when Garr was away. In a way, it was true."

"So what happened?" asked Ladria, green eyes fixed on Canderous.

"She tried to kill me," Canderous said emotionlessly. "Drew on me, and tried to put a hole in my chest. I got hit, but was faster; I disarmed her and threw the blaster into the lake we were standing by. She went crazy for a while and tried to take me bare-handed. I overpowered her and told her to leave or I'd break her neck." He scowled. "I guess I should have."

"I'm glad you didn't," I said. He looked at me, surprised. "You're not like that, killing in cold blood. And she was one of you, however evil."

"Wildcat, I could cry that you think that of me, but I have killed in cold blood. I'm not proud of it now," he said quietly. "But then, I didn't care. She wasn't much different than any other whose blood is on my hands."

"Revan was a mass murderer who killed for ambition. You killed to survive. If she can be redeemed, it's a much smaller step for you to atone," Ladria said quietly. "I myself fell to darkness, starting by defying the Council and following Revan and Malak. You aren't that hate-filled person now, haven't been for a very long time. It started well before Jennet came along."

"I killed during the war not to protect the innocent, but because I hated the Mandalorians and what they had done," added Bao Dur, his gentle eyes bright. "I have spent much of my life since then trying to make up for that hate. And now I consider you, a former enemy, one of my closest friends. I'm glad of that, but we all have things to make up for."

"I killed my mother," I said abruptly.

Canderous looked at me, completely shocked. Even Ladria and Bao Dur looked taken aback. But then something passed between me and her, and she nodded. Bao Dur caught it too, and gave me such a gentle look I almost burst in to tears. But I swallowed hard, and stared into Canderous's blue eyes, hoping he could understand.

"She asked me to, and I did. She was sick, and I knew it, but…" I stopped for a moment. "She was dying, and didn't want to suffer. Her healing was useless, as was mine. I tried everything, but she had waited so long to be with Dad again, and we both could tell in the end, all she would be was a shell. So she asked me to help her hold the poison inside, because she knew she couldn't keep her body from expelling it alone. I held her hand until she was gone. And I knew I shouldn't have done it." I paused, getting myself under control.

When I could speak I said quietly, "You didn't ask me what I saw when Kriea had us in thrall. Now you know."

There was a look I couldn't quite identify on Canderous's face, but his emotions were coming through like a warm current through my mind. I realized with a start that it was compassion.

"That wasn't cold blood, Wildcat. That was mercy. You're stronger than I could ever be," Canderous said seriously. He reached out and wiped away the tears that had started to fall, then gathered me in. I leaned on him for a minute or two, then looked over at Ladria. She looked smiled gently at me.

"Jennet, you're one of the brightest souls I've ever seen. You're human, that's all."

"I think you need to check your own aura before you say that about mine," I said sincerely. "But thank you. I don't really regret it," I said quietly. "She's at peace now. But I did resent it, sometimes even now. I think to myself, if she'd hung on, maybe we could have found a cure, and maybe I wouldn't have been alone. And that's the part that I most feel guilty about; I wanted her to continue to suffer because I needed my mom."

"That just proves the point," Bao Dur said. "You had a choice, and it was mercy, not your own needs."

"Exactly," Canderous rumbled. "I was never very good at mercy."

"But you are," I protested. "You could have let Brinks be caught, and killed; instead you made sure he got away. You had every right to kill Cressa; I probably would have. But you gave her the choice to leave, and live."

"Maybe so. But I've done plenty of other things that I have to account for, and regret now." Canderous said seriously.

"I'm willing to bet that almost every time, if you had a choice of killing, or solving it without violence, you chose not to kill." I said stubbornly.

"Maybe."

"And," I said fiercely, "Ladria's right, even if you weren't a good person once, you sure as hell are now."

"I'm not going to win this argument, am I?"

"Nope."

"All right, Wildcat. I'll admit I'm not the same person I was. But I have a long way to go, and truthfully I'm quite happy the way I am." Canderous said with finality.

"Then let me show you something," I said, and took his hand. I shifted my sight, and looked at his aura, letting him see what I did.

It was even brighter now than the second time I had looked. The red was fading, the black more charcoal, and the blue-white far outweighing the dark. The serenity I'd seen before was a brilliant blue center, and his aura was melding into mine. I heard him inhale sharply, not quite a gasp, and he looked over at Ladria's and Bao Dur's auras, too. Bao Dur was a brighter aura, but not so different from Canderous's. I felt him recognize the similarities, and his start of wonder at it. I smiled, knowing that even if he doesn't fully believe what he saw, I'd made him think.

Then he directed me to look closer at my own. I don't usually do that; call me cowardly but I don't personally like to face my own faults so directly. I've never asked but I'm pretty sure most Jedi avoid checking their own auras regularly as well. But because Canderous asked me to, I looked. To my shock, mine was a lot like Ladria's, the red darker, but no black at all. It was blue-white, not the intense pure white of hers, but nearly as luminous. It was merging with Canderous's own, and where they joined _was_ a bright, pure white, almost blinding. I blinked.

"That's not me," I said numbly.

"Yes it is, Wildcat." Canderous assured me, with Ladria echoing him.

I shifted my sight back to normal. "Well, the Force is full of shit; I'm not that nice a person." I said irritably.

Everyone laughed, and the spell was broken.

"I'm inclined to agree, Wildcat, at least on my own account." Canderous said comfortably. "But I'm glad to know how you see me."

"One day, you'll see I'm right," I said, scowling.

"What did you tell Garr about Cressa's disappearance?" Bao Dur changed the subject; or rather, got it back on track.

"I didn't say anything." Canderous admitted. "When he got back, she was gone, and so was a large chunk of his wealth. I didn't take it; she had cleaned him out just before I let her go. He put a contract out, but never found her. Garr was killed by a rival Hutt a year later, and I moved on. After his death, she was free."

"Why didn't you take over after Garr's death?" Bao Dur asked curiously. Canderous looked at him in surprise, then resignation. The Iridonian was indirectly acknowledging what I had already guessed; that Canderous was Garr's second. There was no reproach in his voice, merely curiosity.

"One, I never was interested in being an Exchange boss. Seconds have far more freedom, and I always wanted an out if I needed it." Canderous sounded matter of fact. "Two, when a boss is killed, the second is often to blame, or blamed even if he had nothing to do with it. In Garr's case, it was clearly nothing to do with me; I wasn't even there at the time. One of the inner circle contacted me when Garr was killed, and I reported up the chain. I was offered another position elsewhere, not as high up, but comfortable enough. I took it for a while, and eventually got a rep as reliable and honest - ironic, since most of the business was based on thievery, murder, and lies - so I ended up floating around various Exchange organizations as sort of an inside man. Not many bosses I worked for realized I actually reported higher up than them."

Bao Dur nodded, and Ladria and I echoed the gesture. I knew what he had done for the Exchange wasn't good, but he had done his best even then to stick to his own code of honor. My heart broke a little for what he had been driven to do by hopelessness, self-hatred and the loss of his people. I despised what he had done, but I could understand, and forgive. I hoped one day he could forgive himself.

I hated to ask, but needed to know. "How did you manage to survive the last five years after Davik Kang was killed by you and Revan and her group? If you reported higher on the Exchange chain, surely they didn't just let you go."

"Well, Wildcat, that's a good question. Something Revan never knew, or if she guessed she never said, and I've never told anyone until today - the Exchange itself put the hit on Davik."

Ladria looked astonished, and Bao Dur and I just stared. "Huh?" I said stupidly.

"When I met Revan, I knew I wanted out. But I wanted a clean break, one that didn't involve me fighting off bounty hunters for the rest of my life, with the price of a small planet on my head. So I reported up the chain the secret deals Davik had been making without Exchange approval. I produced the proof, claiming I had withheld it until I had gotten enough evidence to support my suspicions. They ordered a hit on Davik, and I agreed with the condition that in lieu of payment or another job within the organization, I would be let go, no strings attached." He smiled grimly. "I told them truthfully that I needed to concentrate on finding my own people and reorganizing them again. They did assume I would make a useful contact as Mandalore; I let them."

He turned to Ladria. "I've had a few private conversations with Go-To 'bot since we picked him up, and reestablished my freedom in exchange for my help for solving the threat against the Republic. I was going to help in any case, but saw no reason not to ensure that I would be left alone when the threat was over. I knew he'd recognized me immediately. I didn't want any misunderstandings that I'd welshed on my end. I've made it clear that I'm not going to be a tool of the Exchange. He agreed, and I'm free. I didn't bring it up before because I didn't want anyone else at risk but myself. I apologize for withholding information, and if I made the wrong choice in doing so. It honestly wasn't that I didn't trust you."

Ladria nodded, her face grave. "I can understand your motive. It doesn't matter now, in any case, and I can see you were trying to protect the crew."

There was a moment of silence as the four of us absorbed Canderous's story, and our reactions to it. Then I spoke up.

"Let me sum up the current situation, then." I said, trying to weave together the tangled web. "Cressa manipulated you into getting her in to an Exchange organization, slept her way eventually to the top, continuing to sleep with you from time to time, just in case she didn't get what she wanted. She was denied a permanent place with your boss - in other words, marriage - so she decided to rob and murder him. You found out, and let her go. So now, she what, hates you for letting her live?"

"I think so, yes. She's very used to getting what she wants, and can carry a grudge forever. To her mind, I maliciously denied her the chance to move up in the world. I think she did some quick thinking when she found out I was now Mandalore, and decided to make a play for it. The prestige of being the Mandalore's wife would appeal; she could queen it over everyone. It would give her an opportunity to get back at me for losing her place with Garr, nearly ultimate power of her own people, and bind me to her. Irritating the shit out of me in the process would simply be a bonus; she always did want the most what she couldn't have."

"And it would give her what she's always wanted, a place in the world," Ladria said softly. "I think in some perverted sense, she sees you as the only man strong enough to match her. I would be willing to assume not many have bested her. But you did."

Canderous looked startled at that, then thoughtful. "I can see that."

"So what, she hates him, but loves him?" I asked, bewildered.

"So it would seem," Ladria said. "To someone like her, hate _is_ love. I've seen it before."

"I guess it makes sense in a fucked up sort of way," I said, scowling. "But it doesn't make any sense to me."

"Of course is doesn't," Bao Dur said easily. "You're a good person, and know what real love is. Cressa doesn't, and likely never will. I pity her."

Canderous snorted. "You're far more generous than me. Well, maybe not; pity is the one thing that would make Cressa crazier than she already is."

"I agree," Bao Dur said serenely.

Canderous let out a bark of laughter. "You're a lot more devious than you let on," he said admiringly, grinning at the Iridonian.

"You have no idea," Ladria said under her breath.

I looked at her, but there was nothing on her face to explain the remark. I was pretty sure she was unaware that she had said anything. I shrugged, and let it go.

Ladria said thoughtfully, "It would explain why she had a contract handy, as well. We have to assume she does; this power play would be a bit of a long shot if she didn't have some proof. She would know Canderous would not back her claim. I'd be willing to bet she had it made years ago, with some idea it might come in handy in the future. It's possible she's done that with many of her lovers; it gives her leverage over them."

"Wouldn't surprise me," Canderous agreed.

"This would be a hell of a lot easier if we could just kidnap her and accidentally blow her out the garage hatch just out of atmo," I groused.

Canderous looked at me, his face lighting up.

"Wildcat, you're a genius," he said happily, kissing me soundly.

"I am?" I said stupidly. "Nice of you to finally notice."

"You've given me an idea. Let's wait until Jarxel gets here, but I think it will work."


	27. Chapter 27

**Canderous**

Jarxel arrived, with six honor guard in tow; Dax, Kelborn, Xarga, Tagren, Zuka, and, amazingly, Kex. I gave Jarxel a 'what were you thinking' look and he shrugged. I was going to have to talk to him. Jennet was pleased to see Dax. Dax, I noted, was pleased to see Mira. There were introductions, most of which were unnecessary, but no one but Dax had met Jennet. My men looked her over carefully, dubious looks on most of their faces, but they all bowed, giving her the respect of my Mate, even Kex. I gave them a look of approval, then took Jarxel aside.

"Why in the name of hell did you bring Kex?" I asked irritably. "He's a bitter broken man who hates me."

"He might hate that he can't fight anymore, but he's loyal to you," Jarxel defended his choice. "He respects that you didn't back down when he protested that you made him quartermaster. Moreover, he hated Cressa on sight and would love nothing better than to put a sword in her back."

"All right." I allowed. "I'll give him a chance. But if he turns on us, it's your head. And I'll let Jennet take it."

"Is she really that good?" Jarxel asked skeptically, glancing at her small form with Dax looming over her.

"She's really that good," I confirmed.

"I never thought I'd see the day you'd admit a woman could best you in battle," Jarxel observed.

"Hell, my friend, anyone can be beat by the rawest recruit if they aren't careful," I said, grinning. "You know that. But when it comes to fighting, I'd bet on Jennet."

"I suppose," Jarxel agreed reluctantly. "But I can't wait to see it."

We rejoined the group, and both camps gathered around. We quickly brought them up to speed on my end of it, then turned to Jarxel.

"Report," I ordered.

"As you know, the party arrived two days ago. We've constructed barracks for the guests, the Elders in one, the rest in the other. I'm afraid Cressa has moved in to your quarters; the Elders insisted."

I gave a low growl, and Jennet narrowed her eyes.

_Bitch._

_Right with you, Wildcat._

"When Dax and his party arrived yesterday, they reported where you were and that you had found your Mate. The Elders were understandably skeptical, but after he had told them what he had seen between you, agreed that there was enough evidence to warrant testing," Jarxel continued. He looked at Jennet. "Did you really go crazy when Dax gave you stim, and Mandalore got it out of you, drawing on your own abilities?"

At Jennet's nod, he looked thoughtful. Without comment, he turned back to me, and continued his report.

"Cressa protested that she was your wife, and no outlander woman could claim Mate. The Elders are in favor of her, but are agreeing to test you and Jennet."

I nodded, it was what I had expected. "What is Cressa's proof?"

"She has a contract, with what seems to be your signature. She claims that you two got separated during a fight on Taris and she fled, thinking you were dead. She's also very charming, and trying to win over the men."

"I'll just bet she is," Jennet muttered under her breath. "And you called _me_ a whore?"

"How long was she with the colony?" I asked, giving Jennet an amused look. She smiled reluctantly back.

"About a year. She spent most of it, as far as we can tell, ingratiating herself with the populace. She only claimed she was your wife when our party arrived and told them you had taken the helm of the Mandalore."

"I wonder where she's been before that," I mused.

"Probably whoring with another Exchange boss," Jennet said, just loud enough that she could be overheard, if anyone tried. I saw Kex grin briefly, then stifle it. Dax chuckled.

"Cyar'ika," I admonished half-heartedly, "You're not helping."

Jennet gave me her best wide-eyed innocent look. "But I don't _want_ to help her," she said sweetly.

Atton snorted; most everyone else, including my men, chuckled.

Disciple spoke up. "Will the Elders allow me to authenticate the contract?"

Jarxel looked dubious. "I don't know. They don't like jetti much, but they do allow that you are honorable foes."

"Let me take care of that," I said firmly. "The jetti are closer to extinction than we are now; it's time to mend differences."

There was a rumble among the honor guard, except Dax, and Jarxel looked amazed. "You would think of allying with the Republic?"

"I would think of survival, and rebuilding our race. We cannot win against the Republic, but we _can_ be an asset to them, on our terms. There are still battles to be won."

"As a puppet of the Republic?" Jarxel snarled.

"As an honored ally," I shot back. "We would have honor and respect again, and a place. What do we have now, but a scattered populace, with most of us sunk in dishonor and petty thievery? I would change that, and make us a force to be reckoned with again. We can do it, with help, and the Republic is in a position now that they would take _our_ help, with thanks."

Jarxel thought about that for a while, then nodded slowly. "I suppose that makes sense. Convincing the Elders might be trickier."

"Leave that to me, and Jennet, and our friends."

"As you say, Mandalore," Jarxel said.

"Now," I said with satisfaction, "my plan."

"About time," Jennet muttered. She was irritated I hadn't shared it with her yet. I just grinned at her, and she narrowed her eyes again.

"I'm not going to like this, am I?" She asked resignedly.

"Oh no, Wildcat, you're going to love it," I said confidently. "You're going to get Cressa to challenge you."

She brightened considerably. "Ohhhh, goody!" Then she paused. "How am I going to do that?"

"Just be yourself, cyar'ika. It won't take long, trust me."

We made our way through the jungle to a short distance from the entrance to my base camp. Just before we were in sight of it, I halted the party and Jarxel assembled the honor guard. He led, with three of the guard to each side. In between, Jennet and I were at the head of the party, Ladria and Atton behind us, Bao Dur and Visas following, Mira and Disciple bringing up the rear. We approached the entrance, and I saw a man detach himself from the guard, hurrying away, I assumed to alert the welcoming committee we had arrived. We were saluted by the guards, and marched our way into the main body of the camp.

We entered the camp to a buzz of voices. Everyone was assembled, the warriors lined up in ranks, the visitors grouped in front of them. Someone had even found a drum and was playing a welcoming cadence. As our party and the visitor's approached each other, the beat stopped with a flourish. The crowd hushed; dead silence fell over the grounds. I spotted Cressa just behind the three Elders, dressed in armor as befitted a warrior. Her dark eyes sparked with malicious anticipation.

Jennet had seen her too. Her face didn't change, but she stiffened ever so slightly. She had her hand on my arm, in formal escort posture. I felt it tighten a bit.

_Well, _she said honestly, _I can't fault your taste. She's certainly beautiful._

_So are Spice flowers, but they're just as poisonous. Wait 'til you get to know her, _I answered with a growl.

Cressa was attractive, outwardly. Standing in stocking feet only about five centimeters shorter than me, she towered over Mira and Visas, both tall women. She was muscular, as most warriors are, but not unattractively so; she was still curvy where it counted. Her face was a little sharp for my tastes, but with high cheekbones, dusky skin, a pointed chin, and dark flashing eyes. Her hair was long, a dark sable brown, and tied back with a ribbon in an attempt to look innocent. I would have snorted, but held myself in check. Wouldn't do to be antagonistic right away.

I glanced at my wildcat. She was looking cool and composed, her short blond curls framing her face in a soft halo, her lovely brown eyes veiled. I heard her compare her own heart-shaped face and fairness to Cressa's exotic beauty.

_Cyar'ika, _I admonished, _you are far more beautiful.._

_You need your eyes checked, _she answered grumpily, but I could hear she was pleased.

We were both in full armor, shined to parade ground perfection, and Jennet had her swords comfortably sheathed on either side of her. Her blaster was holstered low on her thigh. I had the helm of the Mandalore under my right arm, my blasters just so, sword sheathed on my back. The rest of our party were also armed and dressed in their battle best.

Jarxel barked attention, and the warriors snapped to, arms held in respectful salute. I returned it, and they returned to parade rest. The Elders approached, and I inclined my head respectfully. The lead Elder nodded back. He was at least a hundred years, but straight-backed and hale as a man forty years his junior. His face was barely lined; the only outward appearance of age was his hands, which were twisted and unable to grasp a sword or blaster properly, and his pure white hair. His gray eyes were sharp and penetrating. The others, a woman with dark hair only lightly streaked with white, and another man, completely gray haired but unbowed, looked equally hearty

"You are Canderous Ordo, the one who has claimed Mandalore?" The head Elder inquired.

"I am."

He looked sharply at Jennet. "And this is the outlander woman you claim as Mate?" His voice was just short of scornful.

"I am his Mate," Jennet said. "I am Jennet Jax, daughter of Draguel Jax and Miranne Organa."

I started at that. _Organa? As in the Onderon Organas? Cousins to the Queen of Onderon?_

_Unfortunately, yes. My mother was required to cut off family ties when she was taken as a Jedi. I've never bothered to reestablish contact, though. The Queen wouldn't know me from a Lagarotz Dragon._

_Interesting, _was all I could think of to say.

"I am Elder Gregor Lund," the head Elder said. "This is Elder Evana Farr, and Elder Drane Barta. We are glad to find more of our kin under your leadership. Your reputation is impressive." Elder Gregor said graciously.

"I thank the Elders for their compliment," I answered gravely.

"Yet," Elder Gregor said with a frown, "it seems you will cast aside your wife, in favor of an outlander woman. This would be bad enough, but she has not even met your kin, or proven herself among us."

"This is not entirely true," I said calmly. "She has proven herself to at least six of our people, not including myself. This group of friends I traveled with, as well as Daxon Ondi and his companions, can testify to her worthiness as a warrior, and as my Mate. As to casting aside a wife, the only wife I have ever had is dead on Malachor V; I buried her and my four children myself."

"How can you say that, Canderous?" Cressa stepped forward, standing close by the lead Elder. Her voice was low and musical, at its most persuasive. "I have the marriage contract here. You saved my life on Taris; I thought you were dead, or I would never have left you there."

"I saved your life, true…by allowing you to leave instead of murdering our boss and your lover, or face your own treachery," I said coldly. "Show me the contract, and I'll prove it the lie it is."

"This outlander woman has cast some sort of jetti spell on you, it's obvious," Cressa said smoothly. "I can forgive that. I only want us to be together, as we were meant to be. Surely you don't want to rebuild our people with this…person," her face showed her contempt.

"I want what is best for our people, yes," I said. "Jennet is my Mate; there can be no better choice. She will bring honor and peace to our ranks."

"Peace? See how she corrupts you? What Mandalorian would want peace?" Cressa said hotly. "We are a strong people, forged in iron and battle. She has made you soft."

"I don't think so," Jennet said quietly. "I have found it takes more strength to maintain peace than war. I know what it is to glory in battle. Yet look what war for battle's sake has brought your people - to the edge of extinction."

I squeezed her hand warningly, and she subsided with a scornful look at Cressa.

"There is some truth in what Cressa says," Elder Gregor said forcefully. "This outlander claims she knows battle, yet preaches peace. It is said she is jetti trained – the very foe that turned the war against us and destroyed our planet. You would foist our greatest enemy on your own people?"

"I would bow to our traditions and take as my wife my proven Mate," I corrected. "Choose your tests; we can prove what we claim."

"I am Jedi trained, yes," Jennet interjected. "But I am more than that – both my parents _were_ Jedi; they left the Order so they could marry. I myself am not, and at this time have no desire to be one. I want it clear who and what I am, least anyone feel I have been less than honorable. I am willing to submit a family history, in so far as I know it, if you so wish."

There was a ripple of voices at her announcement. Some were nodding at her honesty, but none except the men escorting us looked pleased at her admission. I glanced over at Dax. He looked calm and unsurprised, as did the rest of the honor guard, and I realized she must have told them the full story, or at least enough of it for Dax not to feel betrayed in his trust of her. I silently thanked the Gods that Dax was a reasonable man.

Elder Gregor looked at Jennet, his eyes unreadable. She met his gaze unflinchingly. After a moment, he spoke.

"We appreciate honesty and courage; it seems you have both. However, your jetti ties do not help your case. I find it nearly impossible to believe that you would truly be the Mate of any Mandalorian." He said in measured tones. "Most of what can prove you a Mate could be explained by jetti Force ability."

"As I said, I am not a fully trained Jedi," she said calmly. "It is true that Jedi can sometimes see the possibility of future events, sense each other, influence weaker minds, even talk to each other mentally if needed and high enough ability. It is difficult to discern the difference of Force manipulation and the bond of Mates." She continued to look Elder Gregor in the eye, her face at its most respectful. "I would point out that Canderous is _not_ Jedi. My ability to sense his thoughts and presence could not be because of my training. Nor could my ability to sense and use his battle ecstasy. It is also impossible for a Jedi to use the Force through a non-Force sensitive without another bond at work. I would suggest that Canderous submit to a metichloride test to prove he is not Force sensitive enough to be influencing my own abilities unconsciously."

Her suggestion brought a gasp of indignation to the Mandalorians. To even in such a roundabout way that I might be Jedi material was shocking. I had to give her points for courage and creative thinking.

Ladria spoke for the first time, and stepped forward to bow to the Elders. "I am Ladria Windbreak, former General of the Republic, and Jedi."

There was another rumble of recognition. No Mandalorian would be unaware of the person responsible for carrying out the destruction of Malachor V. Her utter calm in the face of the hostile camp was impressive. Ignoring the glowers around her, she continued.

"The war with your people ended fifteen years ago. I have many regrets about my part in it, especially the destruction of your home world, and the decimation of a proud race. To claim I was merely following orders would not be worthy of me, and an insult to you. I would submit that it was a difficult decision to carry out, and I have regretted every day since my role in it."

She looked around the hostile faces, serene but authoritive. She stood straight-backed in front of Elder Gregor, her eyes boring in to his. "The Jedi are on the verge of extinction, the Republic is collapsing. There is a greater threat over all of us now. The mission the Mandalore has helped us with has stopped the worst of the damage, but the battle is far from over. Will you allow me to explain this threat?"

Elder Gregor looked her over, and nodded. "You were a worthy foe during the war. It could be said that our own arrogance brought on our destruction. We will hear you out."

Ladria explained the mission, and the continuing threat of the Sith, projecting her voice so all could hear, yet seeming to only address the Elders. There was silence when she had finished. She allowed a moment to absorb the information, then addressed Elder Gregor again.

"Forgive me for my question, but how much outside contact have you and the refugees you lead had since the end of the war?" she asked quietly.

"Very little," Elder Gregor admitted reluctantly. "We have been isolated, with only the occasional foray out for supplies and very few visitors, all of those accidental. We sent out parties regularly to try and find more of our people, but until three weeks ago were not able to locate any. Unfortunately, most of the ships we escaped our home world in were severely damaged in flight, and what we salvaged were not long-ranged. We had few technological supplies and fewer people trained well enough to build long-range transport or communications. It took us nearly five years to get to a point where we were beyond simple survival, the last ten have been spent trying to establish outside contact."

"I understand," Ladria said gravely. "If you can accept the word of one who once was your enemy, the five hundred in your care are unaware of what is happening elsewhere in the galaxy. I would gladly prove it in any way you deem appropriate; I understand if you cannot accept my story without proof. However, Mandalore _has_ been out in the galaxy, and knows how dangerous this threat is. He chose to put aside differences for the greater good, and ultimately, the good of his people. I see this as an honorable act, and esteem him highly for it."

There was a murmur of approval among the crowd.

Ladria continued, "I would hope that when the business of the Mandalore's Mate is settled, we could continue discussions on how we could work together to neutralize this threat. The Mandoa are great warriors and would be welcomed as a worthy ally of the Republic. This would not be oppression of your people; it would be one power to another, united against a greater threat. There are still battles to be fought; we need all the help that can be found."

The Elders looked skeptical, but impressed, if unwillingly, with Ladria's dignity and authority. Elder Gregor looked at her contemplatively for a moment, then nodded shortly. "We will consider your request."

"I thank you," Ladria said with a small bow. Shifting gears, she said, "As to Jennet's suggestion, I offer our services in the test. I can tell you that as a Jedi, I do not sense enough Force ability in Canderous to explain the bond he and Jennet share. I do not expect you to accept that at face value, and offer the test as a way to prove it."

"The Elders will bear witness to this test, if it proves necessary." Elder Evana spoke up.

"Of course," Ladria answered.

"This is acceptable," Elder Gregor said with a short nod. "However, there is still the matter of Cressa to be addressed. She claims to be wife to the Mandalore, it has not been proven otherwise." He looked at me with a glower.

"She has not produced the contract," I said implacably. "Let her show that, and it will be proved a lie." I motioned Disciple forward. He strode to my side with a bow to the Elders.

"I am Disciple, Jedi and historian. I have spent my life in archives. I can authenticate any contract this woman produces," he said with respectful authority.

The Elders studied Disciple a moment, then conferred among themselves. Elder Gregor came forward. "We agree. Cressa, give me the contract."

Cressa handed it over, blank faced. Disciple took it almost gingerly, as if afraid of catching the malice of the woman it came from. He studied it a moment, his face absorbed. Reaching into a pocket, he pulled out a set of small tools. Grasping a computerized magnifier and strange looking stylus, he touched the paper with it in several places, peering through the small lens. Finally, he looked up, careful to keep his face calm, but with a gleam of triumph in his eyes.

"This contract is a fake," he said decisively. "Look here, this should be a hologram; it's cleverly done with laser engraving, but not a holo. The colors are slightly wrong as well, and the inscription here…" he pointed to one of the seals on the paper, "it's correct, but if I use this stylus, it smears. It should not do that if it was engraved properly. This part was printed with ink, not engraved."

He handed back the contract with a grave bow. The Elder looked nonplussed. After a moment, he turned sharply to Cressa.

"What say you to this?" he barked.

"Canderous gave this to me for safekeeping," she said, convincing anger in her eyes. "He arranged the marriage; he tricked me."

"Oh, give it up, bitch," Jennet said irritably. "You've lost before you began. You're embarrassing yourself."

There was a short stunned silence, then Cressa turned to Jennet, fury on her face.

"You dare talk to me like that, you outlander whore?" she spat.

"What _is_ it with you people and that word?" Jennet said, looking almost bored. "Look, sweetie, you made your play. It's over, you lost. Now get your shit out of the Mandalore's quarters and go back to whatever rock you crawled out from under. I'm done here."

"_You're_ done? Do you think that my people will accept an outlander slut as the Mandalore's wife? What chance do you have of being accepted by _my_ people?" Cressa was dangerously calm. "Especially as you spent six months with two Mandalorian men, with no chaperon or witnesses? Oh, yes, Dax admitted it to the Elders; I was there. Do you think everyone will believe you were only partners?"

"Frankly, I don't much care what anyone thinks. I care what Canderous believes, and he knows the truth, as does Dax. These are the facts: I _am_ Canderous's Mate. We can prove that. _You_ are a lying, manipulative whore who slept with anyone that could be of use to you, and only wants to claim Canderous for the prestige he would give you. I see no honor in that." She broke free of our formation, standing toe to toe with Cressa. The fact that she was a good head shorter did nothing to dispel her authority.

"I've had it with being judged by the fact I'm not one of you. That goes for you too," she said fiercely, spinning to face the Elders. "I understand this is unprecedented and confusing; hell, it's been confusing to me too. You think I'm just dying to live with a bunch of people that are suspicious of me because I'm not born one of them? Not likely," she said, scowling.

"But I care what happens to you all, partly because Canderous cares, but also because I don't like to see waste. You're an honorable and strong people; you deserve to survive. I've liked what I've seen in Canderous, and Dax, and the others I've met so far. But even if you never accept me and I have to live with hate and fear and contempt, I'm still not leaving, because you are Canderous's people, and where his is, I am."

She turned back to Cressa, determination and authority in her stance. "So, bitch queen, get your crap out of _my_ quarters, or I'll get cranky."

With that, she spun away, walked with considerable dignity away from the fascinated crowd, and headed into the interior of the camp.

"Mira, Visas, Dax, Kex, to me," She called over her shoulder. Exchanging puzzled looks, they hurried to catch up. I followed, the entire assembly behind me. I could hear Atton trying desperately not to laugh. A glance over my shoulder caught a glimpse of Ladria, face serene as always, but a light of amusement in her eyes; Bao Dur was swallowing a grin. Disciple looked a little bewildered, but entertained. The rest of the honor guard were stone-faced but I could tell Jarxel was laughing inside.

_All right, don't let me look stupid here; which way is your quarters? _Jennet called to me.

_Over there, to the left, that door, _I answered, giving her a mental picture. I had an idea what she was up to and had to bite back a blast of laughter. _There's a hidden room; I can guarantee Cressa's found it. _I gave her another mental image.

_Thanks._

Her impromptu guard at her heels, she strode purposefully to the door of my private quarters.

"Mira, Visas, with me. You two," pointing at Kex and Dax, "Make sure she doesn't get in." She jammed a thumb over her shoulder at Cressa. "I don't mind if you have to get rough, but she might like it so try not to."

Dax and Kex nodded respectfully, delight all over their faces. Kex even went so far as to smile. I hadn't realized he knew how. "Yes, runi riduur Mandalore," they said in unison.

Cressa wisely stayed put, glaring at both of them.

Jennet smiled brilliantly at them, nodded, and disappeared inside with Visas and Mira. Sounds of rummaging emerged, and a short crow of victory as I felt Jennet locate the hidden room. Shortly, the three women emerged, their arms overflowing with clothing, a few bags, and various female possessions. The three of them unceremoniously tossed everything out on to the grass at Cressa's feet.

"My packing skills are a little rusty," Jennet said brightly.

Cressa glowered, and in three long strides was nose to nose with my wildcat, face deadly calm.

"You insult a guest of the Mandalore," she snarled. "Regardless of our dispute, you show poor manners and no knowledge of our ways."

"There is no dispute; you made your play for power and were caught in a lie. It is you who insult the Mandalore, and his Mate," Jennet said coolly. "As for being his guest, you were not invited here."

She spun on her heel to leave. Cressa, her face contorted with rage, grabbed her arm. Without seeming to break stride, Jennet yanked herself free, grabbed Cressa's wrist with her free hand, spun and swept Cressa's legs out from under her. Before anyone could blink, she had her sword at Cressa's throat. It was all I could do not to start cheering.

"Don't touch me," Jennet said in a deadly voice.

Cressa glared up at her, unable to move with the razor edge of Jennet's blade at her throat. "You attack me?" she snarled. "Is this how you show your respect for a people you intend to rule?"

"As I recall, you grabbed me first, but I'm willing to give you a chance," she moved her blade away, allowing Cressa to get up. "From what I understand of Mandalorian law, your action allowed me to defend myself; I had perfect right to kill you."

"You're twisting law to suit your own needs," Cressa sneered.

"Wow. You certainly would know all about that, so you must be right," Jennet said, smiling.

"What would you know of honor, or our laws?" Cressa spat. "I can give you a lesson in that; I challenge you, Jennet Jax. May you die by the laws you mock."

"I was so hoping you'd say that," Jennet said pleasantly.


	28. Chapter 28

**Jennet**

There was a lot of shouting and some cheering among the crowd after Cressa issued her challenge. The Ebon Hawke crew wisely kept out of it, limiting their involvement by patting my shoulder or back as they passed me to gather together, out of the way. The Elders were conferring furiously, and Canderous stood, not quite grinning, but definitely with a light in his eyes as he surveyed the chaos. Cressa stood, quite alone, looking daggers at me. I gave her my sweetest smile and a finger wave before joining Canderous.

If anything, the loathing in her face increased with my gesture, which was of course my intention. Mandalorians are just too easy to bait.

I went up to my big scruffy Mate and took his hand. Truthfully, he wasn't very scruffy at the moment; his armor was beautifully polished and he was freshly shaved. He'd even trimmed his hair. He smiled down at me, and I grinned back.

"I seem to have caused an uproar," I commented.

"You're good at it," he agreed, chuckling.

"Is this what you had in mind?" I asked curiously.

"Pretty much. The Elders may try to find a loophole, but with Cressa issuing a challenge, they don't have much room to maneuver. You showed admiral restraint until she grabbed you; no one can accuse you of provoking her, even with your little speech. She had been caught in a lie; you had every right to speak to her any way you wanted at that point."

Unobtrusively, the honor guard had reformed around us, faces carefully blank. Cressa remained standing, back straight, her face as devoid of expression as theirs.

The Elders finally stopped talking and Elder Gregor approached, the other two in tow.

"Cressa Dae has issued a challenge to Jennet Jax; this cannot be disputed. Her challenge is to the death, by her own words. This will take place in one hour's time, with the Mandalore and Elders as legal witnesses. The matter of the Mandalore's Mate will be addressed pending the outcome of this match." Elder Gregor looked grave. "Mandalore, it is your responsibility to appraise Jennet Jax of the rules of engagement. We will meet in the battle circle at the appointed time."

Canderous inclined his head, and the Elders did the same. They turned and left, presumably to their quarters. Cressa left as well, leaving her belongings scattered on the grass. I fought the urge to go toss them after her.

The Ebon Hawke crew approached, full of questions. Canderous gave them a 'just a minute' gesture, and they subsided.

"Right now, we need some privacy," he said. "My quarters are soundproofed; come along."

The Jedi trooped after us, as well as the honor guard. Almost everyone took care to tread on Cressa's property as we headed in. Atton and Mira even paused to wipe their boots on a particularly fine-looking tunic, earning an admonishing look from Ladria and a grin on the sly from me.

Canderous looked at his men and said mildly, "You all are no longer on detail, you know."

"With respect, Mandalore," drawled Jarxel, "We'd just as soon stay close until that viper is either dead or off the planet."

"I know when not to argue with you," Canderous said, resigned. "All right, but for God's sake remember who's in charge here."

"I'm thinking _she_ might be," someone muttered, but it didn't sound disrespectful; rather, it sounded almost admiring. I looked around, but couldn't see who had said it.

Canderous laughed. "Say that again after the fight," he tossed over his shoulder. "Now, Jarxel, Dax, I need you two in here. The rest of you, if you must hang around, go ahead and guard the door; make sure we're not disturbed."

His quarters were spacious, but did double duty as the main computer terminal and communications center, plus workbench and makeshift lab. His actual sleeping area consisted of one smallish room that had obviously been walled off as an afterthought. It was starkly furnished with a bed, a table, a lamp, a chair, and a footlocker. I noted the bed was at least a decent size; no squishing for us in a tiny bunk. The hidden room was closed up; I'd carefully made sure of that after I'd raided it for Cressa's stuff. There was obviously no room for ten in the little bedroom; we all crowded around the working part of the quarters.

"Before we discuss anything else, I need to make sure you understand the rules of combat for a death match, Wildcat." Canderous said without preamble.

"Fair enough," I agreed. "What if I don't want to kill her, though?"

Jarxel looked at me, astonished. "Cressa is an accomplished and experienced fighter," he said seriously. "She is half again your mass, a head taller, and has reach on you. I have been told you're good, but you should not be overconfident. I would worry more about surviving the match than sparing Cressa."

Dax spoke up. "I'm sure Jennet appreciates your concern, Jarxel," he said seriously. "But you haven't seen her fight yet. If she says she wants to win, but spare Cressa, she will. She's beaten me, more than once, sparring; I understand she nearly killed Canderous once."

"But those weren't death matches," Jarxel argued. "They were simple sparring. And what do you mean, she almost killed you?" he glared at Canderous.

"It was an accident," I said defensively. "I was crazy with battle ecstasy at the time."

Jarxel appeared to start to argue again, when Mira spoke up. "Look, Jarxel...we're all Jedi, and you've seen us fight. Together, we probably could bring Jennet down. But any less than four of us, I wouldn't like the odds. And no offense, I wouldn't pit her against less than four of yours, either."

Jarxel bristled at that. "This tiny thing could bring down three Mandalorian warriors _at once_?" he almost shouted.

"Probably not," I said honestly, but the rest of the crew were all nodding. I scowled. "With fists and feet, probably not," I amended.

"With blades, Jennet's deadly," Canderous said in his deep voice. "Cressa might be a little bit of a challenge; she's angry and has everything to lose if Jennet bests her. She wouldn't believe that Jennet doesn't _want_ to kill her. Plus, she fights dirty."

"Can we get back to the point?" I asked irritably. "I need rules, and to know if I choose _not_ to kill her, what will happen."

"She will be exiled," Canderous said simply.

"I can live with that," I said.

"Try it sometime," Ladria murmured.

I turned to her, stricken. "I'm sorry; I wasn't thinking."

"No, no," she waved off my apology. "I wasn't either. I would have some sympathy for Cressa, but she has made her own choices, and fully intends to kill you. Your way, she has a chance to redeem herself. I won't say I believe she will do so, though," Ladria said, almost wickedly. I started, then grinned.

"Well, I really don't want to kill her, so let's just leave it at that. Now, rules, please?" I looked up at Canderous, who was looking a little bemused.

"There really aren't many," he said. "No poisoned weapons, no blasters."

"That's it?" I asked, incredulous.

"That's it," Jarxel confirmed.

"If I _was_ Jedi, I could use Force abilities?" I persisted, looking for some catch.

"Yes." Was the simple answer from all three Mandalorians.

"But then…we've never had a Jedi challenged to a death match before," Jarxel said in his grumbly voice. "So there are no rules against that."

"I see." I looked around, but no one seemed to have anything to add. "Well then, any advice?"

"Don't die," Dax said helpfully.

"I'll keep it in mind," I said, smiling. "So what's the big meeting for? I assume you brought us in here for something," I looked up at Canderous.

"Can't you read his thoughts to find out?" Jarxel asked seriously.

"At the moment, no," I said. "He's blocking me."

"Actually, I brought us all in here to discuss what will be coming up, namely the Mate trials," Canderous rumbled. "And I will have to block you during the fight, Wildcat; I'm supposed to be an impartial witness."

"I understand," I said calmly. "I don't need help, anyway."

"I know you don't, that's why I'm not particularly worried. I don't know what they're going to do for the trials yet; they seem to be assuming we won't have to. But they will, and that's what I need all of you for. The biggest test I see is the combat to prove the battle ecstasy; they'd need a way to do that without anyone getting killed, and we don't have energy dampeners on Dxun. Also, they'll likely want to give Jennet a full physical, which we're not equipped for. On top of all that, Jennet's already offered to give a family history. Do you have papers for that?" He turned to me, a question in his eyes.

"Not on me anymore," I answered regretfully. "But they can be retrieved from Jedi archives, if any exist, and there's probably stuff in the Republic database. At worst, there will be records on Onderon and Telos."

"I could check the records I have with me," Disciple said eagerly. "And I would be happy to comb Republic records, too. The Ebon Hawk has adequate computer capability, and I have clearance."

"That would be great," I smiled at him.

"I could probably rig energy dampeners," Bao Dur said thoughtfully. "I'd have to see what you have by way of equipment and parts, though."

"Kex will help you there," Canderous said. "The Ebon Hawk's infirmary is adequately equipped for a physical examination, but I don't know if it's capable for in depth lab tests."

Disciple spoke again. "It can handle almost anything, and if there's a procedure that is required that it can't, I could probably manage to improvise."

"The biggest thing is to win over the rest of the populace," Canderous said. "Winning the challenge against Cressa will go a long way toward that. I don't want you to behave any differently than you usually do, Wildcat. Just be yourself; they will come around, believe me. What I need from you two," he nodded at Dax and Jarxel, "is your support. Dax, I you already know Jennet and are her official Champion; I know we can count on you. Jarxel, you've only just met Jennet; I don't expect you to sing her praises untried. What I do want is a united front; show your loyalty to me, if nothing else."

Jarxel looked at Canderous, his face unreadable. "Are you accusing me of disloyalty, Mandalore?" he asked carefully.

"Absolutely not, old friend," Canderous said seriously. "You are the most loyal man I know, and the best friend I have. All I'm asking is for you to trust me, and show others you do."

"You all ready have that, Canderous," Jarxel said, just as seriously, "I'm just offended that you had to say anything."

"I shouldn't have, then," Canderous said in his deep voice. "It's important to me that Jennet feels she has friends among my people; I apologize if I seemed I was questioning your friendship or loyalty."

Jarxel looked consideringly at Canderous. "I could see as soon as I met Jennet that she was something special, different from Mandalorian women but with the same sort of warrior spirit. I can also see that you love her deeply, although we don't usually speak of such things. I like your Jennet, Canderous, and I'm already mostly convinced she truly is your Mate. I will do everything I can to see to her acceptance here. I will excuse your clumsiness because we are friends, and she obviously means more to you than anything, perhaps including your people. I might question the wisdom of it, but I'm not fool enough to argue." He smiled suddenly. "Besides, I don't think she will let you leave, and I think you're our best chance of uniting us again as a race."

He turned, and bowed to me. "Jennet Jax, I am honored you are the Mate to my friend. If there is anything I can do for you, you have only to ask."

"Thank you, Jarxel," I said sincerely. The gruff warrior grinned at me.

"I am looking forward to seeing you fight," he said sincerely. "I think you're foolish to want to spare Cressa, however."

"I probably am," I said soberly. "But I can't do otherwise."

"She's going to take some getting used to," Jarxel said generally.

"You're telling me," Canderous said ruefully. "Wildcat, I'm not sure why you're so set against killing Cressa. She's clearly a threat, and I know you've killed before in similar circumstances. What about the battle circle on Nar Shadaa?"

"That wasn't really different, I suppose, but in a way it was. I didn't have a choice; if I hadn't killed the two the Hutt sent against me, I would have been killed out of hand; the Hutt had been paid to see me dead. As it was, I barely managed to escape. But I really don't want my first official act among your people to be killing one of you. Let her be exiled; at least then she has a chance of redeeming herself." She paused. "Besides, it's a much worse punishment; she can't come back, even if she does change."

"I can see your point," Dax said slowly. "But I will be watching your back; that one cannot be trusted. As your Champion, I have the right to finish a fight for you, if Cressa is proven to cheat."

"You argue well, Jennet," Jarxel said. "I bet it drives Canderous crazy."

"Occasionally," I grinned. I turned to Dax. "With only two rules, how can she cheat?" I asked, puzzled.

"I wouldn't trust her not to poison her blade. If you die, it might not be proven; if you survive long enough to suspect a trick, I will intervene and kill her."

"I appreciate it," I said. "But it won't be necessary; I know it if I'm poisoned, and can neutralize it."

"But," Canderous said, a gleam in his blue eyes, "Cressa doesn't know that. If you feel yourself poisoned, Wildcat…"

"I'm way ahead of you; I'll make sure it's known." I said.

"I have to tell you though; if she's caught cheating during a death challenge, the punishment is execution." Canderous warned, his voice deep.

"Oh." The implication stopped me. "Well, shit."

"You said it," Atton said ruefully. "Looks like, if she cheats, you might not have a choice."

"Yeah, either I kill her, or Canderous does." I looked up at him, hoping for another answer. "Is that right?"

"Yes."

"Do I have a right as the challenged to ask for exile, instead of death?"

"You do. But if I grant it, it still doesn't look good. You're an unproven Mate; it would be assumed I was granting you favor that most don't yet believe you deserve."

I thought about that a while. "But if I ask it, and you refuse, you could look like you're trying to get rid of a problem…your ex-lover."

"If it's proven she cheated, no one would question the punishment." Canderous assured me.

"Well, damn." I said hopelessly. "I suppose we're just going to have to hope she plays fair."

The snort that rumbled through the room was loud.

There didn't seem much else to discuss; we spent the rest of the time until the match was scheduled to start talking about general things, and telling Jarxel and Dax about meeting me, and the mission Ladria had led us on. The minutes passed quickly, and it was soon time to go to the battle circle. Canderous and I, along with our friends, were escorted by the honor guard. I wasn't nervous, but I was anxious for this to go as well as it could.

When we arrived, Cressa was already there, a blade on her hip and a calm, detached look on her face. I slipped my blaster out of its holster and handed it to Dax. Elder Gregor motioned us into the middle of the circle, and started the ceremony.

He turned to me. "Jennet Jax, do you swear to abide by the rules of this match, using only blades, no blasters, and no poison upon your blades?"

"I do so swear," I answered gravely.

"Cressa Dae, do you also swear to abide by these rules?"

"I do so swear," she said. I tuned in to her, trying to get a read. She wasn't very Force sensitive; I could only get a glimmer, and it told me nothing that I didn't already know, or guess. She wanted me dead. I looked at her carefully, and realized that she was on stim. Well, it wasn't against the rules, but I wasn't thrilled.

"Fight with honor," Elder Gregor said, bowing to each of us. We returned the bow, and he left the circle. Immediately, we both drew our blades and went on guard.

I watched her carefully as we circled each other. There was a gleam in her eye that wasn't entirely from the stim, and I was almost sure Canderous was right, and her sword edge was tainted with poison. No matter, really; I hadn't found a poison yet that I couldn't flush. Finally, Cressa got tired of circling, and her blade came at me, low and quick. I blocked it easily with my right sword, shoving it aside and aiming for her gut with my left. She leaped back, avoiding the thrust, whirled around and got me a glancing blow with the flat of her blade high on my right arm. I ignored the bruise as I turned to face her.

I didn't give her time to recover her stance; I beat aside her sword again and got in a nick in the same place she hit me. First blood. Her face contorted with anger, but she countered amazingly fast with a feint to my left, which I ignored, and a met her long vibrosword with my both my blades, shoving upwards. I shot a foot out and kicked her in the gut. She staggered, but managed to disengage and whirl away to regroup. I followed, swords ready, one low, one high. Using her momentum, she dropped low and tried to sweep my ankles. I jumped over her leg, landed solidly, and surprised her by jumping again, straight over her head. I smacked downward with the hilt of one sword as I passed, getting a solid blow to the top of her head, hard enough to have stunned her if she hadn't been on stim. As it was, she merely shook it off, leaped to her feet and was facing me as I landed, having twisted in midair so I was facing her. With a snarl, she came at me, faster than I could have believed, blade held low. I crossed my swords over hers, pushed down with all my might, and trapped it, quickly kicking her in the face hard enough to make her stagger back. Her nose was broken and blood was running freely down her face.

I disengaged my blades quickly, leaped back, and she followed. I was using my sight; but it wasn't much help, and she was, as I had noted earlier, Force dead enough that I wasn't able to anticipate as well as usual. It didn't matter; she was good, but it was obvious from the start I was better. As she charged me, blade moving in a silver blur, she made a fatal mistake; she followed my right hand, which hooked the underside of her blade, throwing it up, and the left blade took her full in the gut, all the way to the hilt. Her eyes went wide - it was a mortal blow; but I had aimed carefully. We regarded each other, eye to eye, her almost black gaze filled with rage. I saw pain, and fear, part of me wanted to enjoy that look. The rest of me pitied her and I didn't trouble to hide it.

I looked her in the face and shoved her off my blade, hard. She fell, dropping her blade and clutching her stomach. I approached, and placed my blade at her throat. There was a murmur of anticipation; the crowd was waiting for me to finish her off. I looked around, seeking the Elders.

"Is the match over?" I asked generally. It was obvious she wouldn't live without a kolto tank, and I knew they didn't have one.

Elder Gregor nodded. "You have won; you should finish her quickly."

I stood over Cressa, face impassive. She snarled at me, "You may have killed me, but my people will remember, and never accept you as the Mate of the Mandalore."

"Wrong." I said coolly. I looked her in the eye, and smiled. "On both counts."

With that, I healed her.

"Let her punishment be exile, not death." I announced in a clear voice. Cressa's face registered astonishment, then absolute hate.

There was a storm of voices at that, and I turned to leave. With a growl of pure rage, Cressa leaped from the ground, moving faster than I thought possible. I heard her come and turned to meet her. She slammed into me, and I felt something pierce my thigh.

"Let's see them accept you now," was the last thing I heard before madness engulfed me.


	29. Chapter 29

Author's note: I'm sorry for the delay in updating; I got a job and it's taking up writing time. I hate it when real life gets in the way of fanfiction! I'm hoping to get in enough time today to get a few chapters written so I can update faster.

Thanks everyone for the comments; I'm delighted people are enjoying the story. Please continue to read and review; as always, I love feedback and it helps me keep things on track. Thanks! - LJ

* * *

**Canderous**

I was admiring Jennet for being able to avoid Cressa's blade well enough not to have to test if it was poisoned, and her clever solution to winning the match, but not killing the conniving bitch. Then Cressa jumped her, and Jennet went insane.

She hadn't sheathed her swords yet, and the whirling mass of blades slammed into Cressa, ripping her to shreds and almost decapitating her. She fell, dead before she hit the ground. A pulse of energy hit her as she fell; Dax had shot her, too late to stop what she had done to Jennet, but quick enough for all that. He turned the blaster on Jennet, not trying to kill her, only trying to stop her murderous advance. It worked, in a way; she turned toward him instead of the unprepared crowd and danced through the pulses so fast I couldn't follow. The spectators were diving out of the way, and I was sure at least a few had gotten hit by blaster shots. I bellowed for someone to stop Jennet, yanked the blaster out of Dax's hand and opened my mind to Jennet.

Blankness. I swore savagely; Jennet was heading toward the crowd now, blood in her eye, utterly unable to feel me. She was just short of the mass of warriors when she stopped dead in her tracks. Thank the Gods; our friends had managed to stop her. I saw all six of them out of the corner of my eye, in poses of concentration. I ran up to Jennet and felt the alien energy of the stim running through her. She was fighting wildly to break free of the stasis, but was no match for six jetti.

All of this had happened in less time than it took to tell it. I put my hands over her heart, and drew the stim out of her, lending her my strength to keep her from passing out. It was easier this time; I already knew what to do. I nodded and the field was released; Jennet slumped into my arms. Her healing went off, but not as strongly as last time; she had used a lot to heal Cressa. Her eyes opened, looking confusedly into my worried face.

"All right, Wildcat?" I asked gruffly.

"Yes." She stood shakily, and looked over at Cressa. "Oh, no," she said miserably, tears starting to form in her eyes.

"Cyar'ika, she was trying to dishonor you; she killed herself by injecting you with that stim. It wasn't your fault." I said firmly. She clung to me and cried. I talked soothing to her, letting her get it out. After a moment, she stopped, and straightened, wiping her face with her sleeve. I saw the jetti healing the wounded, and nodded my thanks.

The Elders were approaching, their faces grim. "Is the outlander woman under control now?" Elder Gregor asked angrily. "She murdered Cressa after the fight was declared over."

"She reacted to the stim Cressa injected in her," I said, my voice low and deadly, but loud enough for everyone to hear. "A condition she learned about in the meeting _you_ allowed her to attend. I want her blade tested; I would not put it past her not to have poisoned it." I nodded to Dax, who retrieved the sword and the spent hypo, and handed both to Elder Gregor, who sniffed each of them carefully. Drawing a small bottle out of his pocket, he poured a few drops of clear liquid over the steel of the vibrosword. The surface flashed red for a moment, and Elder Gregor looked thunderous.

"There was poison on this blade," he said angrily.

"You think?" I heard Mira say tartly.

Jennet stood straight and glared at Elder Gregor. "I regret that Cressa is dead, but it was her own actions that caused it. She had heard about how I react to stims, and thought to discredit me among your people. Apparently, she poisoned her sword as well; useless against me, but she didn't know that. I'm done being judged."

He looked at her, his face grave, appearing to think over what Jennet had said. Finally, he gave a short nod, and bowed to Jennet. "I was too quick to accuse you; I apologize."

There was a gasp among the crowd; the Elders almost never apologized.

"The matter of Cressa is concluded," he continued. "It is clear she claimed wife to the Mandalore for her own gains, and sought to discredit Jennet in revenge for her failed scheme. Cressa is dead, with dishonor; let her body be removed from this place, in an unmarked grave."

"No." Jennet said firmly.

"You question an Elder?" Elder Gregor growled.

"Damn right I do," Jennet snapped. "You've been questioning me before you met me, seems only fair." There was a faint rumble; admiration mixed with disapproval. Jennet ignored it. "Cressa was misguided, and less than honorable, but she is no threat now. All she wanted was to be with her people again; let her be buried nearby. Her spirit may find some peace. I claim the right to decide as the one who was challenged by her."

The Elders conferred a moment, then Elder Gregor nodded. "You have that right, and we will abide. Trials to prove or disprove Jennet and the Mandalore mates will begin tomorrow at mid-day. But you must show some respect, woman," Elder Gregor glared at her.

"I'll try," Jennet said sweetly, and smiled. Elder Gregor glowered. She looked around the mass of warriors and said soberly, "I apologize to those who were wounded."

"Don't worry about it, lass," someone called. "Takes more than a couple of blaster shots to bring us down." There was a general chuckle of agreement.

"You're a fine fighter, outlander or no," another voice said loudly. "I wouldn't mind testing you myself."

"Maybe later," Jennet grinned. "Give me some time to get my energy back. Now," she said, turning to me, "I need something to eat. Feed me, or I'm going to pass out, right here."

"You got it, Wildcat." I said, laughing.

"If you need more entertainment," Dax said sardonically, "go watch her; you won't believe it, trust me."

There was a snort of amusement, and Jennet mock scowled at Dax.

"You," she said accusingly, "are supposed to be on my side."

"I am," he said, grinning at her. "If there's anything a Mandalorian loves more than fighting, it's eating and drinking. They'll adore you."

_It's definitely in the top three, _I murmured silently to Jennet. _For me,_ _fighting is now neck and neck with another favorite activity._

_If you don't feed me, you won't get to enjoy anything tonight, _Jennet shot back.

"This way," I said aloud, giving my wildcat a lewd wink.

Most everyone followed us to the mess hall; it was about time for supper. As we filed in, I saw where the rest of the newcomers had been; the eight women in the Elder party had taken over the kitchen, much to the delight of my men. Jennet immediately walked over and introduced herself, expressing concern that they were working, rather than being treated as guests.

"Oh, no, lass, it's good be cooking for warriors again," said one tall, matronly woman who had introduced herself as Lorna. "We have few menfolk now to take care of; mostly just our sons. We like to be useful," she said cheerfully.

"I didn't mean to be insulting," Jennet said anxiously. "Is there anything I can help with?"

"Not a bit; don't trouble yourself," Lorna said genially. "We had everything ready before your fight, and watched as you bested that two-faced viper. I don't mind saying we're all glad Cressa is no longer spreading trouble; most of us never really liked her. Now, child, eat; you need feeding up. How you can fight like that when you're so tiny is beyond me."

"I tried to grow; it didn't take," Jennet said gravely, a twinkle in her eye.

Lorna snorted appreciatively. "Well, nothing can be done now; we'll just get used to avoiding stepping on you."

"I'd appreciate it," Jennet grinned. She took the plate piled high with wonderful smelling food, and I did the same, with a smile and nod to Lorna. I led Jennet to the high table, gesturing Ladria and the others to join us when they were ready. The Elders were not present; I assumed someone had seen to their comfort. A nod from Jarxel confirmed this. Dax and Jarxel were already seated, the rest of the honor guard were standing behind us. I looked at them, and gave them the signal to go eat themselves. Kelborn caught my eye, gave me a small shake of the head, and stood taller.

"They'll eat afterward," Jarxel muttered to me. "Quit trying to get rid of them."

"I don't like ceremony, and it's unnecessary now; Cressa's dead." I growled back.

"You took the helm, and want to rebuild us; observe the protocol, and shut up about it," Jarxel glowered. "They're honored to serve you, don't insult them by refusing."

"I'm not trying to insult them," I muttered. "I just wonder if they're going to insist on manning my quarters."

"Your room is soundproofed," Jarxel said with a knowing wink.

"Oh shut up," I growled, and ate.

Jennet of course had heard everything and stepped on my foot under the table. Quite a trick, considering she could barely touch the floor.

_Be nice, _she said sternly. _They love you; let them show it._

_I'm pretty sure it's not me they love, _I answered, an unwilling smile in my thought. _All seven of them are willing to die for you and you haven't been proved my Mate yet._

_Think that if you like, _she thought cheerfully.

_Kex _smiled_ when you ordered him to guard the door against Cressa. I wasn't sure he had teeth._

_He just didn't like Cressa, _Jennet said dismissively. _You could have brought home a Wookie as your mate and he'd have been delighted if it got her out of the picture._

_Think that if you like, _I parroted back, and she stepped on my foot again.

As Dax had predicted, the company was amazed and awed at Jennet's appetite. I heard murmurs of bets going around as to when she'd stop. Lorna and the other women in the kitchen wouldn't allow anyone at the high table to come refill their own plates; they kept themselves busy by bringing platters of food and pitchers of ale. Jennet had four large tankards of the ale and I heard Kex whistle behind me.

"She's not even listing," I heard him say, not quietly but not shouting either.

He had reason for being surprised; one tankard was about the equivalent of three straight shots of Firewhiskey. Kex could out drink anyone in the camp, including me, and his limit was about seven. By four, he'd be either expansive and talking war stories or starting to get mean, depending on his mood when he started. Usually mean; Kex wasn't noted for his jovial personality. I noticed Visas at the end of the table had switched to water; so did most of our jetti friends. Only Bao Dur was still accepting refills. Jennet drank water along with her ale; she needed water as much as food to keep her energy high.

If Jennet heard the comment, and I was sure she had, she made no sign. She finished her dessert of bread and honey baked with berries and smiled at Lorna, who was poised over Jennet's tankard, ready to pour more. Jennet waved her off.

"No more, for now," she said, a huge smile on her face. "Just water. Lorna, that was the best meal I've had in months. Absolutely wonderful. Please thank everyone for me. Wait, no, let me thank them." With that, she got up, not staggering a bit, and trotted off to speak to the cooks. I looked after her with approval.

"That's a grand lass you have there, Mandalore," Lorna said to me. "Nice manners, and can take care of herself."

"She is," I agreed, "and she certainly can." If that last was on the gruff side, it wasn't because I disapproved, truly. Jennet's independence is one of her qualities I admire most, even if it does occasionally threaten to make my heart stop. Something of that must have been on my face, because Lorna gave me a sharp look. Then her expression softened.

"Ah, that's how it is," she said. "Any outlander that can make the Mandalore look like that is either very special, or very devious. I don't think Jennet's dishonest."

"Oh, she can be devious," I assured Lorna.

Lorna snorted. "And who can't, from time to time? You've never lied in your life, hm?"

I gave her my smile that makes people go away. She just snorted again, winked, and started gathering up dishes.

It was good to have Mandalorian women around again. Part of the reason I loved Jennet was she was so much like them; strong, brave, prone to speak her mind, and completely fearless when it comes to males. It helped, I'm sure, that she knew without a doubt she could whip the ass of most of the population, but even if she couldn't, I doubt she'd act any different.

Where she was different from Mandalorian women, besides being about a head shorter, is she wasn't afraid to cry, or show weakness. She'll lose her temper just as fast as one, but will apologize just as quickly, with no expectation that anyone will think less of her for doing so. People I'd met on my travels had commented from time to time that Mandalorians seem to have only two states of mind: anger and indifference. This simply isn't true; we're just not comfortable showing much emotion around anyone we might end up being enemies with. When we're among our own, we're a much livelier bunch.

But softer emotions – love, pity, compassion, sorrow, among others – we don't express openly much at all. We feel them, even show it, but talking about it puts you at a disadvantage and allows someone else to have power over you, something no fighter is comfortable with. Our whole culture is based on battle; we train from practically birth to protect ourselves in every way possible. In the fifteen years since the end of the war my outlook on many things had changed significantly, but I still had instinctively shielded my emotions, not wanting anyone, including others of my race, to get close or have any sort of hold on me. I had believed, as most of my people did, that if you show weakness, you _become_ weak. Allowing emotion to rule you gets you killed in battle. Showing someone else that you care gave them the power to hurt you, and subtly leaves you vulnerable to attack.

For ten years after the war, I worked with people that had more or less the same philosophy, but far less sense of honor than the average Mandalorian. I had sunk into self-hatred, anger, and hopelessness. Then I met Revan and her crew, and slowly learned a bit about trust, and allowing myself to care about something besides battle, and myself. In actual fact, I _didn't_ care about myself much; I was marking time until someone came along and killed me, which I more or less welcomed. Revan started the change in me, and I found that helping others and occasionally showing people I cared about them was both harder than fighting, and took more strength. But I didn't want anyone too close; it might make me weak.

Then Jennet whirled into my life, and she could fight better than anyone I'd ever seen. But she had gotten sick when she blew up the Hutt, avoided violence when she could, and cried when she had killed Cressa, someone who clearly wanted her dead. She wasn't afraid to show a hundred Mandalorian warriors she loved me, and had gotten Kex to smile, for the love of the Gods. She had helped her own mother die on her own terms, rather than waste away for months or years, helpless and in pain. She _cared_ and showed it, and none of it made her weak. She was stronger than almost anyone I knew, and it was because of what my people considered foolish: caring, and showing it.

I used to get irritated about outlanders calling the Mandola barbarians. To my mind, culture was a waste of time, manners were a way for people that couldn't fight to hide their weakness, and being polite was a form of lying. So many other races treated women with contempt, or at least as less than men; Mandalorians see women as equals, and respect their power. Over the years, I'd learned the ways of outlanders well enough to understand that different outlooks didn't necessarily mean weakness, and adapted somewhat. What hit home now was realizing that Jennet respected herself, gave respect to others freely, even when it wasn't deserved, demanded respect from others and got it, even among my people, all without changing her own personality one bit. The head of the Elders _apologized_ to her. And she hadn't been formally proved my Mate yet.

She was changing an entire culture without knowing it, in less than a day. No one could call this woman weak. It humbled me that she was mine; I hoped I would deserve her one day.

When she returned to the table, I pulled her on to my lap and kissed her soundly, reveling in the feel and smell of her. She kissed me back with enthusiasm, wiggling a bit to tease me. There was a slight rise in volume in the voices around us and I glanced up to see Jarxel grinning over Jennet's head. Public displays of affection are not frowned upon; it's mutual marking of territory. The mood around us was one of approval. But my train of thought while Jennet had been off complimenting the cooks was still with me, and I set her back a little to look her in the face. She was rosy and smiling, and I could tell that she had let the ale affect her a little.

"I love you, Wildcat," I said aloud, not troubling to keep my voice down. I wasn't loud, but I wanted her to know I didn't care who heard me.

She looked surprised, but didn't look away from my gaze. Her face softened, and she said in the same tone, "I love you too, ti kar'ta."

There was a snort behind me, which I ignored, but no shocked silence or disapproving rumble. I smiled. It was true – we were changing, and to my mind, for the better.

_Not too much, please, _Jennet said in my head. _I would miss my grumbly nerf._

_Don't worry Wildcat, I doubt we're going to start crying over sentimental holovids any time soon._

_Good; that's MY job. _She burrowed more comfortably in my arms, and rested her head on my shoulder.


	30. Chapter 30

**Jennet**

Dinner was magnificent; the women had outdone themselves. I had no idea if this was a normal meal, or a special feast, although I suspected the latter. I was pleased to know I would never go hungry when I was among Canderous's people. The food had quite restored my energy, and I felt fabulous.

Topping off my evening was Canderous declaring he loved me in front of everyone. I had been mildly shocked but hugely pleased. Tuning in to the mood around me, I felt the buzz of gossip spreading around the room, and was happy that there didn't seem to be much in the way of disapproval. Maybe they will accept me. I hoped so.

I had offered to help clean up after the feast, but Lorna and the other women shooed me out of the kitchen, saying that there were still some left to feed: most of the honor guard, the burial detail, and a few stragglers that had been elsewhere when the meal began. They assured me that they'd have plenty of help once everyone was fed and urged me to rejoin the rest of the party. The rest of my friends from the Ebon Hawk had also wandered in about this time and were firmly told that as honored guests, their place was out in the hall. So we left, with our compliments to the cooks. Lorna seemed especially pleased with the gesture.

Shortly after our return to the table, Canderous stood and announced there would be a bonfire and story telling out on the grounds. About six men saluted and hurried out to prepare the fire pit, and then everyone else slowly filed out of the mess hall. Kex, Kelborn, Xarga, Tagren, and Zuka remained behind to have their own meals. We passed a group of three coming in as we were heading out. I assumed they were the burial detail, and stopped to ask them where Cressa was laid to rest. They told me it was near the entrance to the camp, just inside the border. I made a mental note to go pay my respects. She had been ambitious and conscienceless, but she had been a Mandalorian warrior, and deserved to be honored for her part in the war, if nothing else. I was sorry she had had no opportunity to change her ways, whether I believed she would have or not.

There were roughly a hundred and twenty people gathered around the huge bonfire, watching with anticipation as the six men holding torches prepared to light it. At Canderous's signal, they thrust the burning brands deep into the wood that had been soaked in some sort of alcohol; I could smell it wafting on the air. The dry timber caught quickly, and soon there was a hot blaze reaching for the sky. There was a collective "Ahhhh" of appreciation, and everyone made themselves comfortable.

Canderous sat on the ground, long legs stretched in front of him, leaning back on his elbows, watching the fire. I sat next to him, legs crossed, chin on my hands. I love looking at fire; I always think if I listen hard enough I will hear it speak, and the flames make me either want to dance, or sit utterly still, mesmerized by their glowing beauty.

Ladria sat off to his right, Atton beside her, not quite touching, but they both leaned ever so slightly toward each other, her dark red hair merging with Atton's sable brown, both highlighted with orange and gold from the flames. Bao Dur was behind Ladria, dreamily staring into the bonfire, with Visas and Disciple nearby, chatting quietly. Jarxel was with them, talking about the upcoming trials, no doubt. Disciple looked his most earnest and was gesturing with his hands. Dax and Mira were about a meter to my left, heads together, voices too low to hear. Mira's hair was an echo of the bonfire's flames, and Dax's black head blended with the growing darkness.

The rest of the people from the hall had joined us. The eight Mandalorian women had seated themselves a few meters away, while the honor guard had placed themselves discretely around me and Canderous. Kex was to my left; I smiled at him, and he gave me a gruff grin back.

I had asked Canderous about him, and why he couldn't fight anymore. Apparently Kex had taken considerable damage to both hands, and one leg; he could hold weapons, and fight one on one well enough, although most of the warriors could take him pretty easily. His speed and agility were severely depleted, and it made him bitter. I had heard a few mutterings about his temper, and the fact that he tortured himself by going into the battle circle, only to lose almost every time. I wondered if there was anything I could do to restore some of his mobility. I silently asked Canderous if Kex would let me try.

_I don't know, Wildcat. He's pretty much brought bitterness up to an art form; I'm not sure he'd be willing to let go of it. If anyone can heal him, you could. But I would be wary of giving him false hope._

_He's a good man, ti kar'ta, _I said quietly. _If I can help, I would like to._

_Go ahead and ask, Wildcat. Just don't be insulted if he tells you to mind your own business. And he likely won't be nice about that._

_As your Mate, he _is_ my business, _I answered. _I can handle a few insults._

_I'll alert the troops; they'll want to set up the betting pool, _Canderous said sardonically.

I decided to ask now, rather than later, before I lost my nerve. Truth was, Kex did intimidate me somewhat; the waves of bitterness coming off him were palpable. I'd noticed, however, that it had abated somewhat in the time we've been in camp. If I was wise, I probably should wait until after the Mate trials to talk to him. But when have I ever been wise?

I approached Kex cautiously, and sat close enough to be able to talk without being overheard. He looked at me, weathered face impassive, sharp eyes gleaming in the firelight.

"What's on your mind, lass?" He asked without greeting me.

"I was wondering about your leg and hands," I said, equally straightforward.

"And why would you wonder about that?" he growled, looking at me sharply. "Heard I was a cripple, eh?"

"You're not; Jarxel wouldn't have chosen you for the honor guard if he thought so." I said tartly. "I only wondered if perhaps I could help. I am a healer, quite a good one."

"Good enough, I suppose, but you couldn't save Jareth," Kex said rudely. "And you couldn't tell Dax was alive."

I flinched, but said steadily enough, "I suppose Dax told you about that."

"He did."

"That was a long time ago," I said, trying not to sound defensive. "I've learned a lot since then."

"If it's all the same to you, keep your healing. I like you, lass, but you can't help me." Kex said shortly.

"It's not all the same to me. How do you know unless you let me try?" I asked reasonably.

"Why would you care?" Kex asked harshly.

"Because you're a good man, a fine warrior, and loyal to Canderous. Why wouldn't I care?" I shot back.

"I'll admit from what I've seen so far, you're a good match for the Mandalore. But you're not Mandola, and know little of our ways. You're born of jetti blood; this would be no ordinary healing, even if you could do it. I'm not eager to be beholden to a jetti."

"I see." I looked hard into Kex's eyes. "You'll accept me as Mate to Canderous, but not the benefit I will bring, even if it restores you to full warrior status? A gift freely given, without expectation of reward? Are you so afraid of me, then?"

"You call me coward?" Kex snarled.

"I do," I said calmly. I could feel Canderous tensing behind me, and warned him to keep out of it.

_I turn my back on you for two seconds, Wildcat, and you get in trouble, _he answered, resigned. _I warn you, if Kex gets ugly, I don't care how loyal he is._

_I can take care of myself, _I said with a mental finger shake at him.

_That's what I'm afraid of, _Canderous chuckled.

"I ought to kill you for that, but I'm not an idiot; I've seen you fight." Kex glowered at me.

"Go ahead and challenge me, then," I said. "There are other ways to best me."

"What do you mean?" Kex asked suspiciously.

"If I can out drink you, you'll allow me to try and heal your hands and leg; if not, I'll stay out of your business, publicly apologize and pay whatever penance you choose for calling you a coward." I said with a smile.

Dax heard this and looked up at me sharply. I saw the astonishment and warning on his face and waved him off. He looked resigned, and shrugged.

_Wildcat, you are a devious woman, _Canderous said in my head.

_It's for his own good, _I answered.

_Maybe. He's either going to adore you for the rest of his life, or hate you with a terrifying passion, no matter if you actually heal him or not._

I noticed he had no doubt I'd best Kex in a drinking match.

_It isn't exactly a fair contest, _Canderous warned me. _He might accuse you of cheating._

_Would you?_

_Hell, no._

_Then I'm betting he won't. He's a bit afraid of jetti in general; he classifies me as one. I'm certain Dax has told him a bit about how much I can drink, I don't think he really believes it._

_I just hope it doesn't go badly, that's all._

_I'll do my best to let him save face, _I promised.

Kex was looking at me consideringly. Finally, he shrugged.

"All right, lass, I agree. Let the Mandalore judge us."

"How much have you had so far?" I asked.

"Only two tankards; I'm on duty."

"I've had four. Would you like to catch up, or will you allow Ladria to start us both off sober?"

Kex looked at me sharply. "She can do that?"

"Yes."

Canderous came over to us and said matter of factly, "I've been healed this way; there's nothing to worry about."

"I guess it would do no harm," Kex said reluctantly.

Canderous spoke to Ladria, who came over and used her healing on both of us. Kex looked a little stunned by it, but unexpectedly grinned.

"That could come in handy once in a while; kolto doesn't do this."

Ladria smiled. "It is a useful ability," she agreed.

Kex looked at me suspiciously. "You can do that too, can't you?"

I smiled. "Yes."

His brows drew down into a ferocious frown. "You are a dangerous woman."

"Possibly," I said easily. "But you did agree to the challenge."

"I did. I could claim coercion on your part. I don't see how I can win." Kex said with a growl.

"I give you my word I won't use any more of my healing than normal." I said gravely.

"And what is normal to you?" Kex asked sharply.

"She means she will allow the alcohol to metabolize at her body's normal rate," Ladria explained. "No spurts of healing to keep her completely sober. I imagine it's not that far off from yours; you are at least twice her size."

Kex thought about this a moment, and shrugged. "All right, that is fair."

A barrel of ale was brought out, with two mugs, a few chairs, and a small table. We'd attracted a sizable crowd by the time it was set up. Canderous took one of the chairs, sitting on it backwards, amusement on his face. Dax was asked to keep the mugs filled, and we began.

The stuff was strong; I sincerely hoped my body would metabolize the liquor fast enough not to disgrace myself. Kex was calm, steadily drinking down the tankards with little pause. I was glad the mugs weren't the huge ones from dinner; these were about half that size. We got to ten before Kex started swaying a bit in his chair. I was steady enough, but starting to feel a little muzzy. There was laughter and shouting going on all around us, and I heard bets exchanged. At fourteen, he was slurring and starting to tilt sideways, pausing to steady himself by putting his hands flat on the table top and closing his eyes. I remained upright, but had the feeling my head was about a foot above my shoulders.

We were given another mug each, and drank it down. My mug shook slightly and I concentrated on keeping my hands from trembling. Kex regarded me with a genial grin.

"You're good, lass," he said, slurring enough that the 'lass' sounded more like a hiss. I smiled back fuzzily.

"You too," I said warmly.

Dax handed us each another, and we managed to down it. By this time I was starting to really need to find a 'fresher and was wondering if I could get there without assistance. Kex was listing alarmingly now and I considered forcing him to call it off. Better not; if I was going to have any chance at all of winning him over it had to be on his own terms. Dax refilled our mugs and I regarded it thoughtfully. Kex picked his up, downed it in one gulp, and I followed suit.

Kex's mug hit the table with a thump and he keeled off his chair, dead to the world. A shout of laughter and cheers went up and I slowly stood up and made my way to him, checking his breathing and pulse. He was starting to snore loudly and I giggled. Ladria was there right behind me and she smiled at me.

"He's fine," she said unnecessarily. "How are you?"

"Okay," I said with difficulty. "I need to find a 'fresher though."

I smiled at the cheering crowd and staggered off to find Canderous's – our – quarters. I saw him engulfed by his people and sent him a fuzzy thought that I'd be right back. I hoped he got it.


	31. Chapter 31

I found the 'fresher without too much difficulty and once relieved, I gave myself just enough healing that I wouldn't vomit. I wanted to, badly; it had been quite a long time since I'd allowed myself to get really drunk. I didn't think it would help Kex much if I suddenly was sober, and didn't want to have to pretend all night I was drunk. I managed to get back outside without too much damage; I only stumbled into things twice. Kelborn and Xarga were outside the door, waiting to escort me back.

"Don't you guys get tired of being on duty?" I asked.

"Are you kidding? This is the most fun we've had in ages," Kelborn said sincerely. "No one knows what you'll do next," he added with a grin.

"Great; I'm the local entertainment," I grumbled. "Glad to be of service."

"I've never seen anyone out drink Kex, not even the Mandalore," Xarga said admiringly.

"I'll tell you a secret; I was worried there for a bit," I slurred. "He's got the constitution of a kath hound."

I started back toward the bonfire. Xarga gently steered me the right way – apparently I'd lost my sense of direction. I allowed him to lead me back to Canderous, who gathered me to him in a hard hug.

"You know you're impossible, right?" He asked rhetorically.

"Not if you play your cards right," I said, leaning over to nibble on his ear.

He purred a little and sat down with me draped ungracefully over his lap. I closed my eyes and leaned against him, smiling. I could feel the alcohol slowly being absorbed and neutralized; I gave it about an hour before I was sober enough to want to move again. Meanwhile, storytelling had geared up again and I listened to various people recounting tales of battle and glory. Sometimes they spoke in their own language and I was surprised to find even drunk I could follow well enough.

Canderous's arms were warm and soothing; I snuggled into his chest and raised my face for a kiss. He was smiling at me and obliged, stopping before it got too involved. I growled a little in frustration.

"As much as I would love to, Wildcat, I can't leave the circle yet," he murmured in my ear. "Give it an hour or so."

"Oh, all right," I said, resigned. "I'm enjoying the stories anyway."

About a half hour later, someone shouted "Jennet!"

I was much clearer now; a good deal of the drink had metabolized. I looked up at the shout and yelled back, "What?"

"Tell us a story, lass!" the voice said. I focused and saw Angus about halfway around the fire, a tankard in his hand.

"Um…." I looked up at Canderous. He was grinning.

"Go on, tell them a story," he encouraged.

"I don't know any," I protested.

"Tell them about Jareth, then," he said, his eyes serious. "There are some of his kin here, they would like to hear it."

I stood, glad that I wasn't swaying anymore and the ground felt solid beneath my feet. My head was still feeling a little floaty, but I could speak steady and stay upright. Someone pressed another mug of ale into my hand and I eyed it dubiously. Oh, Gods. I took a sparing sip and the crowd cheered. I cleared my throat, and started to speak.

To my surprise, I spoke Mandoa. It came to me easily, with the occasional mental help from Canderous when I couldn't find a word. There were startled looks all around the bonfire, and a rumble of approval. I'd noticed the Elders had joined the circle, sitting near Canderous, their eyes fixed on me. I nodded to them, and they inclined their heads back in greeting. I could see Dax and the rest of the honor guard quietly translating for my friends.

I started with the fight at the cantina on Tatooine, and meeting Dax and Jareth, how they tried to make a pass at me and I defeated them both at once. I spoke of the friendship we forged, and skimmed over the jobs we did together. The crowd loved it; they were quiet in the right places, shouted approval when I spoke of the fights we got into. When I reached Jareth's death and my belief that Dax was killed too, there was dead silence. Dax stood, and recounted his escape from the Hutt and how he had thought that I had run away. We finished the story together, ending with meeting on Telos and how he discovered I had believed him dead, and his admiration for Canderous and his Mate.

I concluded, "Jareth was a good man, and a brave warrior. He died as a Mandalorian should; in battle, protecting his boss and friends. I will miss him."

There was a sober silence, then Canderous stood. "To Jareth," he said, raising his mug.

"To Jareth!" the roar almost hurt my ears.

Someone started playing a lively tune on some sort of flute; drums joined in, and a few other instruments I couldn't identify. Almost as one, the crowd started dancing around the bonfire, and I was whirled into the pattern. Canderous was beside me, laughing, and I was astonished to see he was very good. I knew he was graceful as a big cat, but dancing wasn't something I had pictured him doing. He read my thoughts and grinned.

_Nice to see I can surprise you._

He picked me up and whirled me around, making my head get dizzy again. Then he tossed me to the next man in line, and I saw that all the women, Jedi and Elder included, were being whirled and tossed too. We were all laughing and flushed and happy. The men of course outnumbered the women about ten to one. It was quite some time before I was back with Canderous. Finally back on my feet, I stumbled a little and regained my balance. It was time for another trip to the 'fresher.

I tossed a mental call to Canderous about where I was headed and found my way back to our room. I drank some water afterwards and felt it give me some more energy. Refreshed, I came back outside and was a little startled that I didn't have a guard waiting. I was rather glad; I'm not used to being followed around and hadn't had a single moment really to myself in ages. I leaned back against the wall of my quarters, enjoying the cool air on my flushed face. The stars were very beautiful and I could make out the bright light of nearby Onderon, where my mother was from. I wondered if she could see me, and if she would approve of where I was and of Canderous. I thought that she could, and did, and Dad too, and felt comforted.

"I miss you both," I said softly to the stars. They twinkled back, a cheerful glow in the night sky.

Not really paying attention to where I was going, I headed back toward the bonfire. I was mostly sober now, but still a bit light-headed; I tread carefully on the uneven ground. After a while, I realized I should have reached the crowd by now, and the sounds of merriment were faint. I looked around, confused, and heard something off near the shadow of a building. Curious, I quietly approached and saw the tall form of Dax, enthusiastically wrapped around Mira, absorbed in a very passionate kiss. Mira looked equally enthusiastic and absorbed.

_Good for them, _I thought, and melted back into the darkness.

Trying to get my bearings, I walked toward the noise of the party, but the wind was carrying it oddly and I couldn't place where it was coming from. I ended up in a dead end and retraced my steps. I wasn't alarmed; the camp wasn't _that_ big, and I would be damned if I interrupted anyone else making use of the shadows to ask for help. Besides, I was a little embarrassed that I was lost, and didn't want to give the camp more gossip to chew over. On the heels of that thought, I suddenly came upon Atton and Ladria, as occupied as Mira and Dax, and again silently slid back into the shadows. I was pleased for them and had no intention of interrupting anything. It was about damn time, in my opinion.

I hadn't had the opportunity to get the layout of the whole camp yet and had no idea where exactly I was. I saw a shuttle craft in a hanger nearby with several buildings scattered around. There was a building that seemed to be a bathhouse, and one I thought was probably barracks next to it. A man was coming out of the first, and saw me looking confused. As he approached, I could see he was very drunk, and I turned to walk the other way.

"Hey lass, you shouldn't be out here in the dark by yourself," he called. "Someone could get the wrong idea."

I didn't answer, just started walking the other way, fast. I disliked the aura I was getting off him and wanted to avoid a confrontation. He was quick though, for all his drunkenness, and caught up to me, grabbing my arm.

"I wouldn't do that," I said pleasantly, trying to shake him off.

"Just trying to see you safe," he said, slurring. "I should get a nice reward from the Mandalore for protecting you, yes?"

"I doubt it," I answered.

He made a sort of lunge at me, and I quickly yanked the arm he had a hold of forward. He stumbled, off-balance, and I swiftly brought my knee up and caught him under the chin, hard. He went down like a fallen log, out cold.

"I hope you don't remember that," I said to him, and quickly trotted the other way. I gave up trying to find my way alone, and tuned in to Canderous, following his presence that glowed like a candle in my mind.

_Everything all right, Wildcat? Where are you?_

_I'm fine, _I projected back. _Just went for a walk._

_You got lost, didn't you?_

_Um…_

_What happened? _He had caught a bit of my encounter before I could block it.

_Just an overly helpful drunk, _I said dismissively.

_Is he still breathing? _Canderous asked dryly.

_Yes, _I answered brightly.

_Do I want to know who he is, and what he did?_

_Probably not._

_Wildcat, do you think you could get through the rest of the night without getting into trouble? _Canderous sounded more resigned than irritated.

_I don't know; how much longer before we can politely leave the bonfire?_

_Just get back here and we'll leave. I have an idea that will keep you occupied._

I smiled. _Almost there._

I made it back without further incident and Canderous kissed me warmly hello. Warmth turned to serious heat in seconds and I felt him pick me up so I could reach his mouth better. I helpfully wrapped my legs around his waist so he didn't have to carry my full weight, and concentrated on devouring his tongue. He groaned appreciatively and sucked mine into his mouth. My turn to groan.

Before things could get out of hand, he shifted me around so he could walk easier and without putting me down headed toward our room. I saw out of the corner of my eye two of the honor guard starting to follow and felt Canderous shake his head sharply at them. I had a feeling Jarxel wouldn't allow us to escape the guard altogether, and would send them after we were safely in our room. I quit thinking about that and started nibbling Canderous's ear, tracing the whorl of it with my tongue. He rumbled like a big cat and I smiled. I bit a little harder and he shivered.

Arriving at our quarters, he strode in to the little bedroom and elbowed the lock. Turning, he let me dangle, grabbing me by the waist and leaning us against the door, kissing me hungrily. I wrapped my legs around his waist again, answering his hunger with my own, loving the feel of his hard body against me. I pulled at his shirt and he paused only long enough to take it off, get mine out of the way, and pressed me back up against the door again. His skin was hard and smooth against my softness, the muscles flexing as one of his hands explored my breasts, the other keeping me in place. I ran my own hands down his broad back, enjoying the solid feel of him.

His hands and mouth were driving me to frenzy and I wiggled impatiently against him. He pulled back with the grin of a kath hound at feeding time and let me drop long enough to finish getting naked. We spent an awful long time against the door and I enjoyed every second. When he was starting to have problems remaining upright, he shifted and got us on to the bed, where I proceeded to drive him insane. We were loud enough that I was glad the walls were soundproofed.

Eventually, we made it under the covers, exhausted with the events of the day. Just before I drifted off, Canderous pulled me close to him, spoon fashion, his muscular arm heavy around my waist, one hand cupping a breast. He murmured something incoherent in my ear and I caught the word 'home'. Too tired to ask him to repeat it I sent a thought as my brain shut down.

_Home is where you are._


	32. Chapter 32

**Canderous**

When I woke, it was mid morning, or so said the clock on the wall. Jennet was still asleep, and I watched her, enjoying a chance to just look. She was curled up, hands under her pillow, knees bent, a faint smile on her face. Her blond curls were wildly twisting everywhere and I could count six faint freckles on her nose, like tiny flakes of gold. It hit me all over again that this amazing woman was mine.

She had been incredible last night, not just with me, but with the entire camp. Almost everyone there had expressed admiration for her in one way or another. Challenging Kex to a drinking match had been a brilliant stroke, and the side effect of watching her tipsy had been, well, fun. Cute isn't a word I use, but she had been, getting lost, talking to the stars. I had picked up on that but hadn't wanted to mention it; it seemed intrusive. She apparently projects sporadically when under the influence. Telling a story in Mandoa had amazed the population and I had overheard the Elders murmuring approval. She hadn't even realized she was going to speak in that language until she started, and I wondered just how deep the bond between us went.

She muttered something in her sleep, and frowned. I watched her go from peaceful slumber to troubled tossing. I reached a hand out to touch her and she calmed, the frown easing. Curious, I tried tuning in and found I could catch glimpses of her dreams. She was with a woman, an older version of Jennet but with dark hair and blue eyes, as she lay dying. A flash of a handsome man with Jennet's blond curls and brown eyes, showing her how to throw a dagger. A Twi'lik man, dead at her feet, a look of surprise on his face. The mercenaries at the cantina, opening fire. Me, hands at my neck, blood pouring out of a slit throat. That one made me flinch violently, and I took my hand away from her, afraid of causing more unease. A moment later, when I had myself under control again, I gathered her in to me, and felt her relax.

The dream flashes were more pleasant now: a bird in flight, feathers jewel-like in the sun; the locket I gave her and the pleasure she felt opening the gift; Jennet as a small child, as friendly as a Gizka pup, healing a small furry creature she found in the woods. She stirred, and I felt her begin to awaken. I smiled and kissed her all the way awake.

Before she was completely aware, I felt her healing kick in and the small bruises, nail tracks and slight ale headache I sported melted away. She didn't bother to open her eyes, just kissed me back thoroughly before pulling away to look at me. Her smile was sleepy but shone brightly.

"Good morning, ti kar'ta," she said, barely restraining a yawn. "What time is it?"

"Tenish," I answered, kissing her again, because I could. "Two hours before we're expected for trial," I added after we came up for air.

"Don't remind me," she muttered.

"Cyar'ika, after last night it's mostly a formality," I said confidently. "I don't think anyone really questions that we're Mates anymore."

"Maybe not, but as the first outlander Mate in your history, I'm betting they're going to want to prove it beyond a shadow of a doubt. Which means they'll be merciless."

"You have a point. But we'll pass any test they throw at us, because we _are_ Mates."

"True," she said softly. "If you had told me three weeks ago I would be here, with the Mandalore, proving I was his Mate, I would have checked to see if you were on Spice."

"I'm with you there, Wildcat," I chuckled. "And now?"

"I can't imagine being anywhere else," she said softly. "I love you so much it scares me."

"There's very few things that really scare me, Wildcat," I said seriously. "I lost everything that mattered, I thought, on Malachor V. I didn't care if I lived or died for ten years. Then I met Revan, and she put some heart back in me. The only thing that scared me for the next five years was the thought of losing the rest of my kin, and the Mandoa passing into history. Then I found you. The thought of leaving you, or you gone, scares me more than anything else I've ever felt."

She looked at me, her eyes round and astonished. "How worried about the trials are you, really? Is this where you promise to kill me slow if I ever repeat what you said?"

For a second, I thought she meant it; then I realized she was teasing me. I'm not sure which was harder to do the first time – telling her I loved her, or admitting that loving her left me open to fear. As usual, she didn't let it be easy for me. I gave her a good glower, which she of course ignored, and kissed me on the nose. I grimaced.

"Don't worry ti kar'ta, there's no windows, and the room is soundproofed; no one saw or heard anything to indicate what a softie you are."

I gave an inarticulate, if insincere, growl. She just kissed me again, then got up to hunt for a robe. Finding it, a couple of towels, and clean clothes, she started toward the 'fresher.

"I'm going to go take a shower, then find breakfast and coffee. If you're quick you can join me," she said with a slow smile.

I found clothes in about six seconds; I almost beat her to the shower. I paid her back for teasing me, which she appreciated enough that I was glad there was a lock on the door and sound dampened walls; Kelborn and Xarga would have gotten more of a show than their imaginations were currently providing. They were there on duty outside our door when we came out of the bedroom to get to the 'fresher. I was glad it wasn't all seven of the honor guard; I wasn't sure I could take the knowing looks first thing in the morning.

Showered and hungry, we made our way to the mess hall, followed by Kelborn and Xarga, where Lorna had the women again providing a fabulous morning feast. We were one of the last in, and cheers went up when we entered the hall. I found Jarxel finishing up his breakfast, the rest of the honor guard scattered among the crowd. Our two shadows took up station behind us.

"Good morning," Jennet said cheerfully to my second. Jarxel grinned.

"How are you feeling, runi riduur Mandalore?" he said pleasantly.

"Fine, thanks. How's Kex?" She dove in to her meal with her usual enthusiasm.

"Hung over. Irritated. I'd watch myself with him until at least this afternoon," Jarxel said with a chuckle.

"I'm holding him to the bet, you know," Jennet said quietly.

"I have no doubt," Jarxel said gruffly. He leaned forward conspiratorially. "If you can help him, I will also be in your debt," he said quietly. "He's a good man, and I've been at a loss of what to do with him these past few years."

"I'll do my best," Jennet promised.

"I know you will," Jarxel answered seriously. "I believe you do what you say."

"I do," Jennet confirmed. "Which reminds me," she added, turning to me. "I still need to teach you to fight."

Jarxel choked on his coffee. Jennet helpfully pounded on his back until he got his breath back.

"My way," she said in explanation. "He doesn't need any help from me, really."

"Hello, sitting right here," I grumbled menacingly. They both ignored me.

"Use the Force to fight?" Jarxel said, utterly astonished.

"No," I answered shortly.

"He can do that already when he fights with me," Jennet added brightly. I sent her a glower; she just grinned and ate some more.

Jarxel just looked from me to Jennet, bewildered. "You can use the Force through Jennet?"

"Sort of," I said, not looking at him, applying myself to breakfast.

He looked suspicious, but interested. "Sort of, how?"

"Think when you're joined in battle ecstasy, but can draw on each other's particular strengths," Jennet said, taking a sip of coffee. She swallowed, and took another bite of eggs. "And you can see what they're seeing while you fight," she added after a moment.

"That's…." Jarxel looked at a loss for words.

"Amazing, yes," Jennet said cheerfully.

"So what is it you're going to teach Canderous?" Jarxel asked, puzzled.

"A technique my father taught me," Jennet answered. "It looks a lot like using the Force, but isn't. If you can become hyper-aware of what's around you, you can sort of see it in slow motion, but react in real time. Only works if you have good reflexes to start with; Canderous's are incredible."

Jarxel looked at Jennet, considering. "I think I grasp the concept; what does it look like in practice?"

Jennet shrugged. "Take a swing at me."

"What?!"

"Go on," I said, amused. "She'll get out of the way, I promise you."

Jarxel looked at me, completely at a loss. Then he shrugged, and shot out a fist at Jennet, fast. Jennet moved too quickly to follow; his fist sailed over her head and smacked the back of her chair. Before he could move it back, she had his arm in both hands, pulling it forward. She stopped just as suddenly and released him.

"Like that," she said, and went back to her breakfast.

The table was silent, and Jarxel looked at Jennet, his mouth open. He shut it with a snap.

"You can teach this?" he asked.

"You, probably." Jennet said in between bites. "Great reflexes."

"Not good enough," he growled.

"Oh, no, they're great," Jennet said easily. "On stims, you could take me. You're about as fast as Canderous. I don't think you were trying very hard."

"I wasn't eager to hit the Mate of the Mandalore," he snapped.

"Canderous told you to," she parried with a smile. "Look, I'm not trying to make you look bad, I apologize."

"None needed," Jarxel said gruffly. "I probably deserved it. I've been told you were good, but even the fight with Cressa you didn't do anything like that. I underestimated you."

Jennet winced a little at the mention of Cressa but answered readily enough. "She was on stims, and was very fast to begin with. She was also pissed off. That can help, or hurt, depending on how you let it; she was used to being angry when fighting and it gave her an edge. I used my sight, but it didn't do a lot of good."

"She's still dead," Jarxel pointed out. "And you're not."

"Yes." Jennet said shortly.

"Trials are probably going to take a while," I interjected, to get Jarxel off the subject of Cressa. "I don't know when we'll have time for lessons. And," I said, turning to my XO, "I need a plan to get the rest of the refugees here to Dxun. From what I understand, they're too remote for us to move there. We know of roughly five thousand more Mandoa around the galaxy. It's about time we start getting us back together."

"I agree," Jarxel said, diverted. "If we can clear the jungle and hold fast against the predators, Dxun is ideal. We could be self-sustaining in just a few years, and Onderon is close enough that we can aid the Republic, if you choose."

"I do. But I thought you didn't like the idea," I said, looking at him in surprise.

"I've thought about it, and the Elders seem to want to consider it. It would be good to be recognized as a worthy ally. I don't think the Republic will want to drag us in to their politics much." Jarxel said. "And mercenary work would be a useful trade for goods we can't produce."

"My thoughts exactly." I watched Jennet get up to help herself to more food and coffee, Lorna's dark head bent toward her, chatting quietly. Jennet grinned at her and said something that made her laugh.

"It will be good to have women around again," Jarxel said quietly. "I wouldn't mind looking at one the way you do Jennet."

I eyed my second with some surprise. His story wasn't that different from mine, only he had lost five children on planet, and one son in battle during the war. He had joined me when I went down to look for survivors, and we had helped each other bury our families. We had parted company after our first mercenary job, and hooked up again after I took the Helm. He never asked me much about what I had done in between, and I hadn't asked him either. He was about fifteen years my elder, but less ambitious; he had been content to act as my XO, and was a good one. If there was anyone I trusted as much as Jennet, it was Jarxel. I looked at him consideringly.

"You'll find a mate," I said gruffly. "If she's not too picky. Gods know why Jennet puts up with me."

"I don't think she has much of a choice," Jarxel grinned. "Mates don't, you know."

"So I've heard," I said. "Can't say I'm sorry."

"It's a whole new universe now," Jarxel said. "A Mandalore with an outlander Mate, half the men eyeing the jetti women with favor, plans to aid the Republic. Interesting times."

"True. Right now, I just want to get through the trials. Think on the plan for the exodus to Dxun, yes?"

"Will do," Jarxel promised. "Speaking of the trials, the Elders say to meet them at your friends' ship at mid-day. The honor guard will meet you at the entrance."

"The rest of them, you mean," I said sardonically, pointing with my chin at Kelborn and Xarga. "I doubt they'll let me out of their sight. Bring home a woman, and suddenly everyone stands on ceremony."

"Now you know why I like being second in command," Jarxel chuckled.


	33. Chapter 33

We finished up breakfast with a little time to spare. Jennet gave me a quick kiss and said she was heading outside to stretch and do some calisthenics. I joined her; I had been too long without a regular routine. Side by side, we went through push-ups, sit-ups, pull-ups. I managed to do more, but not by much. She gave me a quirk of her mouth.

_Competitive, much?_

_I've got to take what I can get with you, _I answered gruffly.

_All you have to do is ask, _she purred back. _Or look at me like that. Or breathe._

I grinned, and kissed her. She took my hand, and we walked together to the entrance of the camp. The honor guard was waiting; Jarxel let me know that our jetti friends were already at the Ebon Hawk. We all made our way to the ship, Jennet muttering about being sweaty. I didn't mind; she smelled good to me. Honest sweat has never been a turn off to a Mandalorian.

Once on board the 'Hawk, we were greeted by the Elders and the rest of the crew. Jennet and I bowed respectfully and they returned the gesture.

Elder Gregor spoke. "Most of the writings regarding Mates have been lost; there has not been a true Mate of a Mandalore in two and a half centuries."

Jennet looked at me accusingly. "You said four generations."

I looked back, puzzled. "Yes. A generation is about eighty years."

"Oh." She looked mollified. "Most humans consider a generation to be twenty or so."

Elder Gregor cleared his throat. We went back to paying attention. "However, there are the classic signs of being Mates: sharing battle ecstasy, sensing each other's presence, even over distance, reading each other's thoughts. We have never heard of an outlander Mate before, let alone one who is Force sensitive; we can only imagine what the two of you can share, if proven Mates." He paused, looking from me to Jennet. I remained stoic; Jennet smiled sweetly.

"Elder Evana, Elder Drane and I have decided that the first step in the Trials is to test Jennet for Mandoa blood, and Canderous for metichlorides; this will eliminate more scientific explanations for their bond. I am relatively certain we already know the outcome of these tests, but we would like it on record. This is an unprecedented event, and we as a race have few enough records left. Disciple has graciously offered to act as scribe during the trials; we are fortunate to have a trained archivist on hand."

Elder Gregor inclined his head at Disciple, who gravely nodded back, his eyes shining.

"Ladria Windbreak, as senior Jedi present, and acting head of the Council," Jennet looked up sharply at that, and Ladria smiled at her serenely. Jennet smiled back with approval. "Has offered to conduct the blood test on Canderous; Elder Evana will conduct ours on Jennet. We would like physicals from both of you, to ensure you can survive the Trials. This is a formality only, ceremonial, if you will. However, as no Elder council has formally approved Canderous as Mandalore, this would be a good time to do so, and physical trials are part of that."

"No." Jennet and I spoke together.

"You refuse?" Elder Gregor asked with a glower.

"Not to ceremonial examinations, no," I explained calmly. "I object to being 'approved' as Mandalore. I _am_ Mandalore, have been for five years now, and the Elder Council does not hold that much power over government."

"If you attempt to endorse him now, formally," Jennet added, "along with our Mate trials, you're more or less publicly doubting his claim to the Helm. I understand it's only the Mandalore and his Mate apparent that undergo trials; anyone else can just marry and be done with it. You can't have it both ways; either he _is_ Mandalore, and is undergoing trials to prove he's Mate to me, or he isn't Mandalore, in which case, we're done here."

"I doubt any of the men here will take kindly to having their leader questioned," Jarxel said in a quiet but carrying voice.

"They certainly wouldn't," Dax added with just a touch of a growl.

The Elders looked from the two men flanking me to Jennet, then my face. Unexpectedly, they all smiled.

"You have passed the test, Mandalore." Elder Gregor said formally. "The loyalty of your people is impressive."

"Thank you," I said. "The trials?" I was aware of the honor, but didn't feel it was necessary.

"Yes. Master Ladria?" he nodded to her, and she stepped forward, holding out a device almost exactly like the one I'd used on Jennet – was it only ten days ago?

"Elder Gregor, I would like to take not only a sample from Canderous, but all the Jedi present, Jennet, and the honor guard as well, if they consent to it," she said smoothly. "It would give a baseline. I know you want to be as thorough as possible."

"That is a good idea," Elder Evana said slowly. "Perhaps it would be best to do the same with our tests as well. But the Mandalorians involved must give consent freely."

"Of course," Ladria said, smiling.

The common area was crowded with the three Elders, the Ebon Hawk crew, and Jarxel and Dax. The rest of the honor guard were outside, both to ensure privacy and because the ship was full enough. Ladria got samples from all the jetti, Jennet, herself, and me. Dax approached without comment, but Jarxel balked for a second. I gave him a look that said _only if you want to._ He shrugged and put his hand on the pad. I followed Ladria outside, Jarxel coming along.

"Men," I said without preamble, "The Jedi are taking blood samples from themselves, me and Jennet, and would like to take one from you all as well to get a baseline. You do not have to, but it would be helpful. I expect the Elders would like to take some as well. This is strictly a volunteer basis." I turned and went back into the ship.

Ladria and Jarxel returned a few minutes later. I was pleased that not one man refused.

While the test was running, Elder Evana collected samples from everyone as well. In about five minutes, the first results were in.

"Here," Ladria said, plugging her device into the computer terminal built into the table in the common room. "These are the samples from the Mandalorians." She pointed out eight lines on the graph. "This line is the minimum amount of metichlorides needed to be eligible for Jedi training." She indicated a point above a line that was higher on the graph than the other seven. "This one is Canderous," she traced the one that was closest to the Jedi cutoff. "He clearly has more Force ability than the others, but is still below minimum requirements."

"Where am I?" Jennet asked, leaning forward. Ladria pointed on the graph. I whistled.

"Who is the one above her?" I asked curiously.

"Me." Ladria said simply. She turned to Jennet. "I am not going to ask you to become a full Jedi, but for all intents and purposes, you pretty much are. The only one I've seen higher than either of us that wasn't a Master was Revan."

"Surely there were more," Jennet said nervously.

"Of course," Ladria said smoothly. "I haven't seen everyone's, after all."

Jennet sat back, looking a little stunned. I put an arm around her.

"Wildcat, if you want to train, I'm behind you," I said sincerely. "Things are different now, both for the jetti and the Mandoa. There is no Council to forbid our marriage, and my people would accept it, in time. Most already do."

"I…" Jennet seemed at a loss for words. "I'll think about it."

"Fair enough," Ladria said briskly. "As I said, I'm not going to ask. But…the threat isn't over, yet. Jedi are nearly extinct; we would welcome you. I suspect you're more like me than we know; it would explain some things."

"Like what?" Jennet asked sharply.

"We share some common traits," Ladria said quietly. "Healing ability, for one. You might have noticed I'm almost as good as you are in that. The ability to attract people, bind them to you. Within a day, everyone on the Ebon Hawk regarded you as family; it seems the same has happened here, with the Mandoa. I'm not saying," she held up a hand to the Elders, who seemed to be wanting to interject, "That Jennet isn't genuine, or using a Jedi trick to bind Canderous or your people. She wouldn't do that, even unconsciously. But she _is_ charismatic, and a natural leader. With training, she would be even more powerful. That could have a positive effect on your people, with her bound to Canderous. The best advice I can give you right now is not to cut yourself off from the Force, like I did." She gave a sad, bitter smile.

"You are positive Jennet is not a threat, or binding Canderous unconsciously to her?" Elder Gregor asked gravely.

"Absolutely," Ladria said firmly. "She's not capable of it. Canderous is stronger in the Force than most of you, but not strong enough to make the sort of bond with her that would explain their connection. And she should not be able to use her Force abilities through him; he's definitely not sensitive enough."

"All right then," Elder Gregor said. "I have our results as well."

He plugged his unit into the computer, and another graph appeared, floating above the table.

"These are the Mandalorians," he said, touching eight dots. "They all test positive, seven of them pureblood. This one is well over half, but just under full blooded."

I was curious, but decided not to ask whose dot it was. Elder Gregor pointed to the other seven dots, all glowing red; but one was lighter than the others. He pointed to that one first.

"This one has had a Mandalorian in their family history at one point, but does not have enough DNA to generate a positive response. This one is Jennet," he said, pointing to another dot, glowing brightly but absolutely red. "Clearly, no Mandalorian genes at all."

"Well, no one is perfect," I quipped. Jennet elbowed me.

Disciple was taking notes the entire time on a datapad. He looked up at Elder Gregor, eyebrow raised. "Let the records show that Jennet is not Mandoa, and Canderous could not be Force sensitive enough to explain their connection?" he asked.

Elder Gregor nodded. "So says the council."

Disciple busily entered that into his datapad.

"So now what?" Jennet asked.

"We will give each of you a physical examination, and discuss the next trial," Elder Drane said. It was the first time I'd heard him speak clearly; his voice was low and raspy, as if at one time someone had attempted to strangle him, and his vocal chords had been damaged.

"I'll go first," I said, and headed toward the small infirmary. Elder Drane and Disciple followed. The medbay was almost too small for three; all of us were large men, and the room felt claustrophobic. I sat on the gurney and suffered being poked and prodded, Disciple pausing every so often to add something to the datapad. They were swift, and I was pronounced healthy about in about fifteen minutes.

Jennet's exam by Elder Evana and Ladria took longer; Visas took the datapad for hers, and I suspected the Elders wanted more data on Jennet because of her healing and other Force abilities. But eventually, she came out with a clean bill of health. She sat next to me, smiling, and took my hand. I gave her a squeeze back.

Elder Gregor stood, and faced us. "The examination portion of the Trials are complete. Let the record show that there is no medical or other scientific reason for the apparent bond between Canderous Ordo and Jennet Jax; therefore, the Trials will continue. The next step is to prove or disprove the mental connection; the first of these trials will take place tomorrow at mid-morning. We will meet in the mess hall after breakfast; anyone who wishes to witness the Trials may do so."

The three Elders gave a short bow, which we stood and returned, and they left, escorted by Zuka and Tagren back to camp.

"That was almost anticlimactic," Jennet said grumpily.

"Would you rather it had been a grueling seven hour physical examination, complete with probes in uncomfortable places?" Mira asked, grinning.

"Well, no," Jennet said sheepishly.

"At the risk of saying 'I told you so…'" I grinned at Jennet.

"Don't," she said, half-seriously. "I'm glad today was easy, but I really don't think it's going to stay that way. Why tempt the Gods?"

"All right, Wildcat. I'll keep my hubris to myself."

"We're here, with the infirmary, and I have Ladria and Visas on hand. Go get Kex; it's time to hold him to his bet," Jennet said, changing the subject.

Jarxel and I went outside and dragged a reluctant Kex into the ship. He wasn't trying to welsh on his bet, he was just most unhappy about being poked and prodded. When I pointed out how I'd just been through that, he brightened some, but still didn't look eager. Still, a bet was a bet, and Kex was an honorable man. Within a few minutes, he was out of his armor, wearing only his daily tunic and breeches, and looking grumpy.

Jennet took both his hands in hers, closed her eyes, and stilled. I tuned in and could feel her tracing the bones, muscles, sinew, and blood in Kex's hands, assessing damage, judging what could be done. After a time, she shifted her hands to his left knee, repeating the process, touching up and down the whole limb, then took stock of the good leg. It took about fifteen minutes for her to get a complete reading, and I already knew what she was going to say.

"I can fix this," Jennet said quietly. "But it's going to be brutal for a short time, and I'd rather you were out. In fact, I insist on it."

"What do you mean?" Kex asked suspiciously.

"I mean I'm going to have to re-break both your hands and shatter your knee in order to fix them. They've been healed wrongly too long; my ability will only fix you to where you _are_; not where you _should_ be. You are at full strength right now, in body; the state of your hands and leg is irrelevant to my healing. I might be able to do enough healing to permanently remove much of the pain, but not restore you to full function as it is. However, if I break them, I can guide the muscles and bones back to their ideal positions."

Kex looked at her, open-mouthed. He shut it, and looked at me. I nodded encouragingly, as did Jarxel. Finally, he spoke. "You're absolutely certain you can fix me?" He asked, in a voice that was just short of wonder, yet tinged with suspicion.

"Yes," Jennet said firmly. She nodded to Ladria, who grabbed a hypo and started toward Kex.

"No," he said with finality, putting a hand up to Ladria. "I'll do it, but I don't want to be put under."

"Kex," I said sternly. "Jennet and Ladria will not pull any tricks on you while you're asleep. You insult my Mate and my guest by being suspicious of their motives. Besides, I'll be here."

"No, no," Kex said, "I meant no disrespect. I just don't wish to be unconscious. I like your lass, Mandalore. She wouldn't mean me harm."

Jennet looked horrified. "You expect me to do this with you _awake_?!"

"Yes," Kex said calmly. "I wouldn't mind a drink or six first, though."

"You are out of your mind," Jennet said in a low voice. "You get that this is going to hurt _a lot_, right? As in vomiting up a lung pain? As in begging to die? You understand?"

"What's some pain to a Mandalorian? When you're done, I won't hurt anymore, right?" Kex asked.

"Well, no." Jennet said doubtfully. "But it's going to be hell until I heal you. Three times, I'm going to have to do this."

"Lass, it's been hell not being able to fight these last few years. I can stand anything if it means I'll be back to myself again. But I can't do it quietly, drugged. I got this way with pain, I'll get back the same way."

"Alcohol _is _a drug, you moron!" Jennet shouted.

"Aye, but it's a drug I can control," Kex said, smiling. He didn't seem fazed by her outburst at all.

"You are fucking _insane_!" Jennet yelled again.

"No more than most Mandoa," I said, deciding it was time to intervene. "I don't like being put out at all. Wildcat, can you keep it together and heal him, even if he's awake?"

Jennet glared at me. "Of course I can."

"Then do it," I said with finality. I didn't make it an order, really, but she sent me a look that told me just what she thought of my tone.

"Fine," she snapped. "Apparently insanity is contagious. I'll do it. But we'd better go somewhere else, where we can fit most of us; I'm going to need help."


	34. Chapter 34

**Jennet**

We decided the garage was the best place for operations. I needed a place Kex could be restrained easily, and I figured it would take all the males present to do so. Zuka and Tagren had been released from duty after escorting the Elders back to camp. That left four honor guard who could help, plus Canderous, Atton, Disciple, and Bao Dur. Mandalorian males are on the big side; only Bao Dur stood taller and wider than any in camp. Atton and Disciple, while not small men by anyone's standards, looked almost short; I was a midget. Hence, a place at least eight large men, and me, Ladria, and Visas could fit. Mira tagged along, staying out of the way.

I signaled Bao Dur to me. He strode over, a concerned look on his face. "Yes?"

"I need something like a hammer, but broader," I said. "About this wide, and solid." I held up my hands about ten centimeters apart. "Preferably something that I can grip comfortably."

"Jennet, I can do the breaking part for you," he said quietly, his blue eyes gentle. "You don't have to. Any one of us would spare you that, or one of the Mandalorians. I'm surprised Canderous hasn't offered."

"He did, just not out loud," I said, looking Bao Dur in the eye. "I appreciate it, honestly, but this is _my_ patient. He's trusting me to make him better, in the end. It's my job - to give it to anyone else would be wrong. But thanks for offering," I said sincerely.

Unexpectedly, the big Iridonian picked me up and gave me an almost smothering hug. "You're braver than most Zabrak and Mandoa put together," he said, soft enough that only I could hear. "You'll do." He put me down, touched my cheek, then said in a normal tone, "You sure a hammer won't do? You can swing that easily enough."

"I could, but it would take at least five or six blows per hand and three on the knee to do the job," I said grimly. "I'd prefer to make this as quick as possible."

"I'll see what I can come up with," he promised, and went off to look.

Meanwhile, Atton had helpfully found a few bottles of whiskey for Kex, who was drinking it like water.

"We're going to need more of that," I said.

"Oh no, lass, three will do," Kex assured me.

"Sure it will…if you want to take the second hand and the knee sober," I informed him. "The healing will take away the drunk too."

"Ah," Kex said, disconcerted.

"I'll go raid the galley," Atton said, and disappeared into the interior of the 'Hawk. He came back shortly with the Juma Juice and the vile bottle of rotten kolto stuff. I hoped it was enough.

"Give him something to bite," I ordered, and Canderous whipped off his belt, doubling up the leather. He handed it to Kex, who eyed it dubiously.

"Do it," I snapped, "or we stop here."

"Waste of a good drunk," Jarxel said helpfully.

Kex glared at him, but put the leather strip in his mouth, biting down firmly. He got it comfortable, then spit it out to take a few more healthy swigs of whiskey. I waited for Bao Dur and for Kex to be sufficiently hammered. I winced at the choice of words.

_It's going to be all right, Wildcat. You can do this. _Canderous's voice in my mind was warm and encouraging.

_I just never thought I'd have to torture someone to heal them, _I thought back grimly. _Mandalorians are more trouble than they're worth._

_Probably, _Canderous sounded amused, but underneath, I could feel his concern, not just for Kex, but me as well. _I would have talked him into taking the hypo if I could have. I can't expect him to go the painless route if I wouldn't._

_What IS it about doing this awake, anyway? It can't just be macho banthashit._

_Why don't you like kolto tanks or clinics?_

_Because kolto doesn't do as good a job healing as I can, given time, and clinics are a place that they might figure out I'm not physically what I seem. _I answered.

_And because you're not in complete control of yourself. Am I right?_

I didn't answer right away. He _was_ right; I just wanted him to be wrong. _All right, I see your point. But it's still crazy._

_Maybe. But it is what it is. I'm just glad that you don't have to do this to me, this time. And I'm glad that if it ever came to it, you WOULD do this for me._

_I would, damn you. _I thought back.

Bao Dur returned, carrying a smallish sledgehammer sort of instrument. It was only a little smaller than I would have liked, and the handle fit my grip. I gave it a couple experimental swings, then nodded.

"All right," I said, looking at the crowd of concerned faces. "I need all of you," I pointed to each of the men, "to hold him down; I can't heal him if he accidentally knocks me out, and I'm going to be too busy to get out of his way. Bao Dur, you're the strongest; I need you to hold his arm down. Make sure it doesn't move. Canderous, you hold his right shoulder. Kex, time to bite down on that belt."

I had put Canderous between me and my patient, partly so Kex wouldn't see the blow coming, partly because I needed Canderous to help center me. I was functioning fine, but I was more frightened than I was about to show to anyone. I took a deep breath, and prayed to the Force I would aim true. Then I smashed the hammer down on Kex's hand.

I ignored the muffled scream of agony, concentrating on the damage. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Mira, who was proving to be an excellent orderly, shoving a basin at Kex; I smelled vomit. I blocked the sounds and smells, and suddenly I felt a perfect detachment come over me. I calmly tuned in to the shattered hand in front of me. This was my task. I had hit perfectly; every bone was broken, some more than once, the whole thing a pulpy mess. I carefully traced the paths of the bones with my fingers, regulating the healing so it flowed in at a steady but controlled rate, mending bone, tendons, and tissue slow enough to allow the damage to heal in its ideal state. About five minutes' concentration, and I looked up to nod at Bao Dur. He let go of Kex's arm, and the rest of the men followed suit. Kex sat up slowly, flexing his now healed hand.

"There's no pain at all," he said wonderingly. "Look." He balled it into a tight fist, and unclenched it again, offering his hand to Canderous. With a smile, Canderous gripped it, and winced as Kex squeezed as hard as he could.

"Good grip," Canderous said in his deep voice.

"Better than it was before, I think," Kex said happily. Then he looked thoughtful. "More whiskey, this time," he said, and proceeded to drink.

I kept the cloak of detachment around me. Once Kex was sufficiently drunk, we repeated the procedure with the next hand, paused, then the knee. At last I sat back, drained, and gestured at a bottle, which Mira handed to me. Kex had drunk all of the nasty kolto stuff; I was grateful for that. There was about a half a bottle of Juma Juice left. I took a large swallow, and felt the warmth spread over me.

Kex was on his feet now, exclaiming over the absence of pain and bragging that he could fight better than ever now. He swept me up in a huge hug, spinning me around and kissing me on both cheeks.

"Thank you lass! If ever you need anything, just ask old Kex now, you hear?" he said, grinning all over his face. "If the Mandalore is ever too stupid to keep you happy, you know where to find me," he added with a roguish grin.

"Glad I could help," I said sincerely. "He's a bit of a pain, but I think I'll keep him," I added with a grin of my own.

"Good girl." Kex said, ignoring Canderous's half hearted scowl.

"Now, don't go entering the battle circle or otherwise try to fight for at least two days, understand?" I said sternly. "Your body needs some time to adjust, and trying to push it too soon might foul things up. I do _not_ want to do this again, okay?"

"Anything you say, darlin'" Kex said cheerfully.

_Please, _I thought pleadingly, _get rid of them. I need to fall apart now._

Canderous sent me an understanding noise and shooed Kex, Xarga and Kelborn out of the Ebon Hawk, telling them to meet us back at camp. He got back to me just in time to catch me as my legs gave out.

"Basin," I said, and Visas had it in front of me. I lost everything I'd eaten in a week, it felt like. Then I shook for about five minutes, Canderous holding me while I went to pieces. I could still feel the crunch of bones being crushed as I smashed Kex's hands and knee, and hear his agonized roar, muffled by the leather strap, smell the pain and vomit. Gradually, I stopped trembling, and leaned against Canderous, taking deep breaths.

"You were magnificent, cyar'ika," he said admiringly. "Brave as a Mandalorian."

"Very impressive," Jarxel said sincerely. "Not a flinch from you."

Dax just looked at me, eyes shining, and patted my shoulder. Mira touched me too, and he put his arm around her, almost unconsciously. They made a beautiful couple, both tall and strong. I smiled shakily.

"So brave I lost my breakfast," I said a touch bitterly. "Some healer I am."

"Being brave isn't lack of fear," Ladria said softly. "It's being able to act in spite of being afraid. You did what needed to be done."

"Thanks," I said, looking around. I smiled, still a little wobbly. Atton handed me the Juma Juice again. I took another swallow, and felt steadier.

"Good job, gorgeous," he said, giving me his special rogue grin. I gave him a hug, despite Canderous's glower. The rest of the crew followed suit, and Dax, and I felt better.

"I'm glad you were all here." I said. "It would have been a lot harder otherwise. You too, Jarxel," I added. "Thanks for helping talk Kex into it."

"I did nothing," he said gravely. "But I'm very glad he's healed. And I'm very glad you're here. Canderous is fortunate in his Mate."

"Thank you," I said, touched. "I'm fortunate in mine, too," I said with a smile.

"Hungry, Wildcat?" Canderous asked, eyeing me.

"Amazingly, yes." I said with a laugh. "Let me brush my teeth first."


	35. Chapter 35

When we all arrived back at camp, we were greeted by half the population, chattering on about the transformation in Kex. I was suddenly hoisted on to the shoulders of the honor guard and paraded around the complex, much to my embarrassment and Canderous's amusement. Kex led the pack, loudly proclaiming his admiration and showing off his lack of a limp. I have to give the Mandoa credit; they work hard, and play hard, and know how to celebrate. The rest of the day became a prolonged party, with ale being pressed on me at every turn. I drank as little as I could get away with, and ramped up my healing enough to keep me from the listing disaster of last night. When attention was finally off me, I slipped away to visit Cressa's grave.

I sat there, mercifully alone for once, and thought about the last ten days. So much had happened I was almost on overload. I pulled my legs up, arms around them, chin resting on my knees, and meditated. Emptying my mind, I reached for the Force, and felt its warm presence around me. I felt centered again, and smiled. I didn't start when Canderous approached and put a hand on my shoulder; I'd felt him long before he got there. He sat next to me, not speaking, just quietly sharing the moment. I leaned back against him, sighing in pleasure.

"How did you ditch the guard?" I asked.

"They're all whooping it up with Kex," he said in his deep voice. "I think Dax is off with Mira somewhere, and Jarxel for once didn't find it necessary to follow me."

"I like your people," I said, smiling. "They're as overprotective as you, though."

"Not really," Canderous said thoughtfully. "We just like to take care of our own. I don't shield you from your own fights."

"You'd like to," I pointed out.

"Of course I would," he said, a slight growl in his voice. "You have an unfortunate habit of finding trouble that makes me crazy. But I don't keep you from taking care of yourself."

"True," I answered softly. "It's one of the many reasons I love you. You don't try to make me something I'm not."

"I get that," Canderous said, equally softly. "I've had that happen too often myself; it's never comfortable."

"How so?" I asked curiously.

"Gerda didn't, but then we more or less grew up together. But there's been other women, and men, that have tried to turn me into someone I wouldn't recognize. Even when I hated who I was, I didn't really want to be someone else." Canderous looked at the new grave, and frowned. "She was one of them," he pointed to the turned earth with his chin. "At first, she tried to make me into an Exchange boss, with her at my side. When I refused, she went after my boss. She likely would have tried to have me eliminated if she had succeeded, either way."

I nodded. "I can see that," I offered. "Who else?"

"Revan," he said quietly. "We all adored her, you know, and she didn't want to change me, exactly, but was never entirely comfortable with what I was. She _did _change me, without intending to, for the better, it's true. But that was different; more like helping me find my real self again. Most of that party didn't like me much; can't say I blame them, really. I didn't like me that much at the time. But toward the end, there was mutual respect, and even some affection. I wouldn't mind meeting them all again, now."

"Did you love her?" I asked, curious. I wasn't jealous; Revan was obviously the past. But it was a little piece of the puzzle that was Canderous, and I liked to discover new things about him.

"As a friend, yes, although I wouldn't have put it that way then. As a women…a bit, I suppose. She's a worthy fighter, and a strong woman, and she didn't seem to be afraid of me at all. Attractive to someone that was used to being feared." He paused with a deep sigh. "She was, and probably still is, in love with Carth Onasi. But she left a year later, and no one has seen her since. Ladria came back with the Ebon Hawk, and hasn't told anyone what she knows of Revan's whereabouts. Onasi's an admiral now, from what I heard; rumor has it he's waiting for Revan to return."

He had been stroking my hair absently as he remembered, and kissed the top of my head. "But you, Wildcat…right from the start, you weren't afraid of me, even liked me at my worst. I knew as soon as I saw you fight that first time you were something special, and I wanted to know your name, where you came from. That's why I dragged you out of the cantina; I knew I wouldn't get you out of my head if I left you there."

"So much has happened in such a short time," I said, twisting around to look him in the eye. "It would be overwhelming if it wasn't so right."

"My thoughts exactly," Canderous agreed, and kissed me. He pulled back, then asked curiously, "What about you?"

"What do you mean?" I gave him a puzzled look.

"Who has tried to change you?" he clarified.

"Not many," I answered honestly. "I haven't had that many people close enough to try."

"You told me once you'd had a few lovers," he said carefully. "I'm not prying, and not jealous beyond the wish I had been there first. Chalk that up to the possessiveness of the Mandalorian male in general," he said with a self-depreciating snort. "I am curious, though, who would have attracted you before me. You're not the type to sleep with just anyone."

"And you are?" I asked archly.

"I was, sort of," he said honestly enough. "There's always willing women, and I wasn't adverse to their company. I didn't want anyone close, though, so I pretty much kept to one night stands and those who I paid. Cressa was the only 'relationship' I could claim since Gerda died, and you know how that was. There were a few I would have liked to have something more permanent, but I didn't try. Both because I didn't want permanence, and because I was pretty sure they didn't really want _me_, and would try to change who I was. Now," he said with a leer, "I don't want anyone else."

"Well, neither do I," I said with a smile.

"So who?" Canderous asked, a kath hound with a fresh kill.

I sighed. "No one that matters now," I hedged. He gave me a look. "Oh all right, I know you understand that. My first was right after Mom died; I was desperately lonely and unhappy with my part in that. His name was Jarret Jordimane; I took the similarities in our names as a sign. Stupid, I suppose." I leaned forward, remembering. "He was kind, but a drifter, and I knew he wouldn't stick around. Professional Pazzak player; he was always annoyed that I didn't care for the game. He started asking questions about me I wasn't comfortable with, so I found a job that took me away, before he could go himself. We were together about four months. He was a decent fighter, but resented I was better."

"No many men would deal with that well," Canderous said knowingly. "We all say we don't mind, but underneath we're just a bunch of Neanderthals wanting to prove dominance."

"You're not like that," I protested.

"Sure I am," he said easily. "I just don't let it rule me. I don't resent that you're a better fighter than me, sure, but sometimes I wish that I could protect you better."

"You do fine," I assured him. "I don't make it easy, in any case."

"No, you don't, but then neither do I. Wait 'til I run off with some half-cocked idea; you'll just love that," he chuckled. "So who else?"

"Two of them were pretty much spur of the moment things. Didn't last more than a couple of weeks, and we went our separate ways," I said.

"What about Dax?" Canderous asked, no hint of jealousy or suspicion, but something else; like he knew that things weren't as cut and dried as I had told him. I should have known he'd pick up that sooner or later.

"I told you I didn't sleep with him," I said pointedly.

"So you did, and I know that's true. But something was there once, wasn't it?" He wasn't upset, I could tell, just curious.

"More of a possibility of something," I said honestly. "He would have liked to try, and I wasn't against the idea, but there was Jareth, and I wasn't going to pit friend against friend."

"Jareth loved you too?" Canderous asked, trying to piece it together.

"No, he really didn't. Wanted me, yes. And Dax didn't love me, or me him. It was more of could be, with time. But Jareth and Dax were very close, and I would have put strain on that relationship. Jareth was unreasonable on some issues; he considered Dax a blood brother, and thought that meant that they shared…everything. I, and for that matter Dax, wasn't going to put up with me being passed between them, or Jareth's jealousy if I was with Dax. So we kept it to friendship, and everything worked out fine until that day at the cantina. Dax and I only once talked about it openly, and I turned him down. He took it very well, actually."

I turned to Canderous, and looked him in the eye. "I didn't regret it then, or now. If he had meant enough to me, we would have worked things out."

"I know that, Wildcat. I'm only curious. He's certainly taken with Mira now." Canderous seemed thoughtful. "I'm glad of that; Mira's good people."

"She is," I smiled. "I'm glad of it too. Dax is like a brother to me, now, and Mira feels like a sister. I never had siblings; it's nice to sort of have them now. What about you? Any brothers or sisters?"

"I had a brother once. He died during the war. His name was Calder, and he was three years younger than me, and a good fighter. He was a Colonel and was wildly envious of me making General. He was supposed to be promoted two weeks after his death." His face was sober, but calm. "My sister Cartha, who was five years younger, died in childbirth when I was about your age. Almost killed mother to lose her; she always said Cartha had the most sense of her children. She likely did." His voice was almost dreamy with remembrance. "My parents died just before the war started, in a shuttle accident. Father was a great warrior; he was on his way to discuss battle tactics with the Mandalore and Council. They had chosen him to lead the first assault. Mother didn't like being apart from him, which was why they were both on the shuttle."

"I'm sorry," I said quietly.

"Don't be, cyar'ika. It was a long time ago." He made a dismissive gesture with his hand, and kissed me. "You haven't told me about the last one yet."

"You don't forget a single conversational tangent, do you?" I grumbled.

"Nope." He grinned. "That's what makes a good leader; I listen."

I was silent for a while, trying to find words. Canderous was quiet in my mind, not exactly blocking, just not tuning in, and I was the same. It was comforting, his constant presence.

"I almost married, once," I said softly. "It didn't work out."

"When was this?" Canderous looked a little taken aback at my admission.

"A year after Jareth died," I said, looking up. It was dark now, and I couldn't see his face clearly, but his eyes were bright. "He was a friend of my parents'."

"A jetti?" he asked, his voice tinged with surprise.

"Yes," I said, not looking away.

He looked a little shocked, then interested. "I wouldn't have thought you would get involved with a jetti. Did he know of your abilities?"

"Yes," I answered. "He was Dad's and Mom's best friend, they were all Padawan together, and had been inseparable during training. When my dad and mom left the Order, Stefan was one of those that kept in touch and didn't disapprove. He was also the only Jedi they told that I was Force sensitive."

"So they trusted him completely," Canderous observed.

"Oh, yes," I confirmed. "He visited us regularly during my childhood. I called him Uncle Stefan then. I adored him, and he took a genuine interest in my progress. He never breathed a word to the Order about my abilities."

"So how did Uncle Stefan become your betrothed?" Canderous said, a slightly disapproving look on his face.

"What bothers you, the fact that I thought of him as family as a kid, or that he was old enough to be my father?" I asked bluntly.

"Depends on when he started taking a more personal interest in you," Canderous growled. "Like I have any room to talk about age difference; I'm twenty years your senior."

I gave him a look, and he relented a little. "Not until I was an adult. I am certain he didn't think of me as anything but an honorary niece until then. I hadn't seen him since Dad's funeral when I ran in to him at the space docks on Telos. He tried to help Mom after that, but she withdrew, and from what I gathered, asked him not to visit anymore. I always wondered if he was in love with Mom, and she couldn't deal with it."

"Wildcat, this is almost as strange as me and Cressa so far. You almost married a man who was your parent's best friend, a Jedi, and had possibly been in love with your own mother?" Canderous sounded bemused.

"Put that way, it _does_ sound strange," I admitted. "But it came about so gradually that it wasn't, at least not to us. I was on Telos, collecting on a bounty, and Stefan was at the port as I was heading to my ship. He recognized me, even though the last time I had seen him I had been a gawky twelve-year-old. He was on Jedi business and couldn't stay more than a day. We spent it talking about my parents, and what I had been doing, how I was getting along. He had heard about Mom's death, but well after the fact, and apologized for not being at the funeral. I called him Uncle Stefan by habit, and he made me drop the 'Uncle', saying it made him feel old. It was great feeling less alone, even though I had kept up contact with most of my parents' other friends, none but Stefan that was Jedi knew the truth about my Force connection. Just before he left, he said he'd like to keep in touch, and made me promise to meet him again soon."

"What happened then?" Canderous prompted.

"We met on Onderon," I said. It was strange, in a way, to be talking about Stefan to Canderous, but comforting, too. I understood his ease of talking about Gerda to me now. "I didn't ask how he managed that; he was fairly high up with the Order by then, and I figured he had a lot of freedom. We started making dates to meet, sometimes for a few hours, sometimes for a day or two. I began to look forward to the next time I saw him in a much more personal way, and berated myself for acting like a teenager with a crush. I was astonished when he confessed he felt the same way. So he started courting me. He was very careful about it, both because of his position and because I was the daughter of a dear friend, never mind Dad was dead. The age difference bothered him more than me, I think. I was resistant at first, I wasn't going to be part of his downfall with the Council, and if anyone found out about me, I wasn't sure what they would do.

"Stefan was strong, and patient, and he loved me, enough to risk his whole life. I tried to put him off, but he was persistent, and truth was, I was as much in love with him as he was with me. It took me six months to wear down, and then I moved to Onderon, what I thought then was permanently. I was there a year, with him visiting as often as he could, or me traveling to meeting him. I still took bounties and fought in battle rings to support myself, but those are very flexible occupations." I paused, remembering that year, and how happy I had been.

"He talked about getting married, and I put him off a while." I continued. "Finally, one day I said yes. He was going to leave the order, and we were planning the wedding." I looked up at Canderous with a sad smile. "One day, he came home, and we had a wonderful romantic evening. The next morning he was just gone. I was worried, but who would I report it to? I fretted for three days, when I received a holo, telling me he loved me, but that the Order was suspicious now, and some questions were asked about Drake and Miranne's child. That was what everyone called Dad – Drake. He hated Draguel. The Order made it clear – play it their way, or they would pursue the rumors. Stefan didn't want my life taken over by the Council, or my parent's memory dragged through their debates. He took their punishment, and never contacted me again."

"What did you do?" Canderous asked seriously.

"Wrecked the apartment," I said with a sheepish laugh. "Then I got on my ship after packing up what little I wanted to keep, and headed to anywhere I could get a job." I paused. "I was so angry with him, but mostly, I was mad at myself. I had known from the beginning it probably wouldn't work, but I let myself be persuaded. I was mostly mad because for a while, I let myself think I could have a normal life, and knew better. It was so good not to have to hide what I was, to be encouraged to improve. He trained me some, but I refused to learn most other Jedi abilities. It took a year to really forgive Stefan. He's probably dead now," I said sadly. "With the Jedi assassinations and all."

"He was a fool," Canderous said harshly. "He could have left the order, and married you, but gave _you_ up rather than his Order. I can understand trying to protect you, but how he left was unforgivable."

"No," I said softly. "They wouldn't let him tell me in person. It was clear that they weren't going to be easy on him. He actually had to smuggle out the holo; they were going to make him just disappear. I imagine someone on the Council suspected that not only was I Drake and Miranne's daughter, but I was Force sensitive, and fairly powerful. They couldn't prove it, and chose to keep one Jedi in the order rather than pursue me. If they had made a stink about it, they would have lost Stefan too. I'm positive he made a deal that the Council leave me in peace, in exchange for his compliance. I did wonder if he had something on the Council they would rather not be known."

Canderous thought about that, then shrugged. "I still think he was a fool. But then, I'm glad he was."

I smiled, and kissed him. "Me too."


	36. Chapter 36

**Canderous**

The next morning after breakfast, the Elder council began the second phase of the Trials. They took Jennet to one end of the hall, me to the other, and set up a screen between us. They blindfolded her first, gave me a datapad, and told me to read it silently, projecting to Jennet. It was a Mandalorian folk tale, written in that language, and Jennet recited it perfectly, much to the crowd's appreciation. Then they reversed the process.

They gave her a Teloian book of poetry. I don't speak that language, and stumbled on a few of the unfamiliar syllables. Finally, she started translating before projecting and I said it in Galactic Basic, then Mandoa. It was love poetry, and I was glowering at the Elder's sense of humor. The men got a good laugh at my expense, however, so it wasn't as bad as it would seem; I don't mind helping morale.

They brought us forward after the demonstration. Elder Gregor cleared his throat and the laughter and talking died down.

"It seems the mental condition is present. We're going to take Jennet some distance away, and try again. Elder Drane will stay with the Mandalore, with Disciple as scribe. Elder Evana will be acting scribe with me. Jennet, if you will?" he turned to her, and she nodded gravely.

"Of course," she said, and followed them out of the hall. I sat, wondering what was next. Elder Drane smiled, sitting silently.

About twenty minutes had passed when I got a sudden silent shout from Jennet.

_CANDEROUS, THEY'RE TAKING ME AWA-_

I sprang to my feet, the chair clattering behind me. I spun to face Elder Drane.

"Where are they taking her?" I shouted. "What is this trick?"

"Part of the Trial," he answered calmly. "They won't hurt her, you have my word. They've merely taken our shuttle. It's your task to get her back."

"They've knocked her out," I snarled. "How is that not hurting her?"

"She's proven she reacts poorly to drugs," Elder Drane said implacably. "She heals fast; they won't hurt her beyond keeping her out until they reach their destination. It's not a complete test if she knows where she is; she could merely tell you. You need to track her through your connection."

"Why not take me instead?" I growled. "I can take drugs. Or is this going to be repeated?"

"One test should be sufficient." Elder Drane said serenely. "It is a much better proof of being Mates if you can track her; Jennet's jetti abilities can explain much of what might guide her to you. You need only wait a few hours, and then I'll allow you to follow."

I glowered at the Elder, but kept my peace. I could feel her still, and was getting glimpses of dreams; but the connection was indistinct. Then suddenly she was gone.

"I can't feel her anymore; what are you people doing to her?" I kept my voice as steady as I could but I didn't like this at all.

"They put her in stasis," Elder Drane said. I looked over at Ladria, and gestured. She came over, a concerned expression crossing her face.

"Will putting Jennet in stasis harm her?" I asked without preamble. She looked surprised, but answered readily enough.

"It shouldn't. If they have neuro dampeners attached to the unit, it will likely interfere with your connection, though," she said in her quiet voice.

"It has," I said shortly. I turned to Elder Drane. "Where did you get a stasis unit?" I demanded.

"We sent a crew for one the day before you arrived. We were fairly certain Cressa was not being truthful, and the Trials would commence," he said with a grim smile.

"Nice of you to say so now," Mira spoke up scathingly.

Elder Drane looked at her, expressionless. "It is not for the Elder council to prejudge a case, merely to mediate. The fact that the situation worked out as expected has nothing to do with the process. All trials should be judged fairly, not by preconceived notion."

I grunted. It was true, and I had no argument. I didn't like the fact that Jennet and I had been put through the trial, but I saw that it had to be done. I said something to that effect, and Mira subsided.

"Well, no harm was done, I guess," she grumbled.

"Am I allowed to take anyone with me?" I asked the Elder.

"Only me, and Disciple, who will be recording the proceedings. You may choose one more, but it must be Mandalorian; no jetti."

"Disciple is jetti," I pointed out.

"Yes, but he is the scribe, and will not interfere with the Trial. He has been briefed; if he attempts to aid you in the quest, he will be restrained. With force, if necessary. He has given his word."

I nodded. I admitted that while this quest wasn't likely to be dangerous, it wasn't a bad idea to have a jetti on hand if things went sour. I questioned how a lone Elder was going to restrain Disciple, a young man in his prime, but on the other hand, Elder Drane was far from decrepit. Age and experience can outmaneuver youth and strength, not that it would be necessary. I've had my differences with the kid, but Disciple doesn't give his word lightly.

I considered who to take with me. Jarxel would be my first choice, but I needed him to keep order in the camp while I was gone. He'd understand. Any one of the honor guard would be honored to go, but Dax was the most obvious choice. As official Champion, it was his place to protect her – well, with Jennet it was more support than protection; truthfully, I almost felt sorry for anyone that messes with her - if I could not.

"Dax, get ready to go. I want to head out as soon as Elder Drane gives the word," I said.

Dax nodded. "I'm all set, Mandalore."

The hours ticked by agonizingly slowly. I paced most of it, keeping my senses wide open, waiting for a glimmer. I made a quick trip to my quarters, grabbing a few things, including my and Jennet's credit pouches, then strode back to the hall. Finally, I heard her again.

_I am going to kill Elder Gregor, _was the first fuzzy thought I heard. I smiled. If she's bitching, she's all right.

_I'll be there as soon as I can, Wildcat, _I told her, and announced she was fine.

There was a collective sigh of relief, and sudden activity. Dax, Disciple, Elder Drane and I headed to the shuttle bay. Boarding the ship, Dax took the pilot's seat and looked at me.

"Where to?"

"Onderon," I told him. "Dock at Iziz; I'll lead us from there."

The trip was only about fifteen minutes, and we landed without incident. I took care of docking fees and visas, then stood still, eyes closed. She was somewhere south of the docks, on the other side of the city.

"Follow me," I said abruptly, and strode through the city streets.

The streets were crowded; business had picked up since the revolution was settled. I walked quickly through the mob, and people got out of my way. The other three men followed in my wake. It took almost an hour to get to the other side of the city. I paused, and got my bearings again. We were in a residential section, a little run down, but respectable. Third door on the left. I strode over, and kicked in the door. Elder Gregor and Elder Evana were sitting at a table, looking at me and smiling. Jennet was across the room, looking furious.

_It's about time you showed up. Get me out of this thing._

_Sure thing, Wildcat._

I went over and powered down the stasis unit. They had rigged it so she was conscious, just couldn't move. She stepped out, glaring at the Elders, who were all smiling. Turning to me, she stood on tiptoe and kissed me. I returned it with enthusiasm.

_Sorry cyar'ika, I had no idea they would do this._

_It's all right, ti'karta, I'm not really mad; just irritated. I know it was necessary._

We turned to the Elders, and they nodded as one.

"Let the records show that the mental connection that marks Mates is present in Canderous Ordo and Jennet Jax," Elder Gregor said solemnly.

Disciple, a huge smile on his face, tapped furiously on his datapad. Dax grinned and made a victory gesture. Jennet simply hugged me. I picked her up and spun her around, mostly because it makes her smile, and there's nothing that makes her more beautiful when she's not fighting. Setting her down, I handed her the credit pouch I'd retrieved from our room.

"I thought since we're here anyway, we could get you a few things. I'm willing to bet you'd like more than three sets of clothes," I rumbled. I really hate shopping, but there were a few things I needed too.

Jennet's face lit up, and she nodded, eyes shining. "Yeah, I could use some more clothes, and there's a couple errands I need to run too. Um, would you be terribly upset if I said we should split up?"

"Nope. I was going to suggest it myself," I said easily. I turned to the Elders. "Do you want escort back to Dxun?"

"Actually, I was hoping at least Elder Evana would consent to help me," Jennet said almost shyly.

"Of course, child," she said, surprised. "Whatever you need."

The other two Elders and Disciple decided to head back to Dxun. Elder Evana stayed with Jennet, with Dax to escort them both. My wildcat was resigning herself to rarely being alone. She gracefully accepted protection she didn't need and made those who offered it feel honored to guard her. I was very proud of her; I wasn't doing that well myself with the constant presence of the honor guard. I was almost gleeful about having no companion for a while.

We agreed to meet back at the shuttle in three hours, and went our separate ways. There was a little shop I knew about near the palace; I wanted to find a ring for Jennet. I also wanted to order some supplies for the wedding feast that could be picked up later, and electronic equipment that would help Bao Dur rig energy dampeners. He had inventoried our reserves, and let me know what was needed; might as well do it now.

I also wanted to find Jennet a wedding present. I had gotten her the locket, armor, and weapons – I needed to find something else. Tradition among my people is some sort of practical gift that symbolizes the partnership of the bridal couple. She'd probably torture me slow if I gave her a household appliance or anything that suggested she needed to stay in the house and away from fighting. I had an idea, but wanted to get the other errands done first.

I found an electronics merchant and arranged for the parts to be picked up the next day. The grocer agreed to import some of the less common foodstuffs and have it ready in a month. I had been mulling over the idea of Jennet's wedding gift while I took care of these mundane tasks, and suddenly inspiration struck. I made another stop, and spent nearly two hours, deep in discussion. It didn't leave me much time to pick out a ring, but I managed to find something perfect almost upon entering the shop.

I knew she wouldn't want anything fussy, and that if it had a stone of any sort it couldn't be mounted in such a way that it could get caught on things. What I found was simple and unusual. A platinum band, not too wide or too narrow, with a twist in the middle – a tiny metal Mobeus strip. That would have been perfect alone, but it had also been engraved all around with a delicate design of a flowering vine that I recognized as Crysallis. A medicinal plant found on Telos, it can also kill if not harvested or administered properly. The flowers are highly prized by those who can afford them. Rare, beautiful, healing but deadly if not handled right; I could not have found a better symbol for my Wildcat. I handed over the credits and arranged to have the ring sized.

I headed out of the shop, feeling pleased with the day's work. I never felt a thing when the stun grenade went off.


	37. Chapter 37

**Jennet**

Elder Evana proved to be an interesting and lively companion. She voluntarily offered her age – "I'm sure you're curious child, but too polite to ask; I'm 103." – and without the restraints of her office she was much more talkative and friendly. I questioned her about Mandalorian wedding ceremonies, in particular that of the Mandalore.

"The ceremony itself is pretty standard, not so different than a civil union found anywhere in the galaxy. The only addition is the blood ritual; no more than a quick slash to the palms; hardly a scratch," Elder Evana said cheerfully.

"So we do the blood thing, exchange vows, that's it? What do we wear? Would it be okay to have our friends in the ceremony?" I had been wanting to ask all these questions for some time and was bursting to have them answered.

"Yes, that's it," Elder Evan answered my queries in the order asked. "The Mandalore will be in armor, of course, and as you're a fighter too, it would be appropriate for you to as well, if you wish. It's not a requirement; many female fighters opt to wear formal clothing instead. Attendants are optional as well."

I thought about this for a moment. "Symbolically, it would be good for me to wear armor," I said slowly. "At least for the ceremony. Perhaps I could change afterwards, for the reception? And would people be insulted if we have our friends in the ceremony? I haven't really gotten to know any of the Mandalorian women yet, or I would ask them to participate as well." I was worried on this point; the Mandoa are clannish.

"The universe is changing, child, and we will adapt as well. For the first time in our history the Mandalore has an outlander mate."

I smiled. "So we don't need to prove it?" I couldn't resist baiting her a little.

She grinned back. "Nice try, dear. No, I'm afraid you'll have to finish the Trials; it needs to be officially proven. Privately, I at least need no more convincing, and I'm certain my fellow Elders feel the same." She patted my arm, and addressed my last concern. "Have who you will in your wedding; no one will question it."

"Thank you," I said warmly. "I wanted to find a wedding dress, or whatever garments are appropriate. Would you mind helping me?"

"I'd love to," Elder Evana beamed at me.

"I have another errand too, at the financial center," I said. "It won't take long."

We strolled toward the merchant square, Dax in tow. I felt a little sorry for him; escort duty to two women shopping can't be fun. But he was being a good sport about it, not glowering a bit as we peered into shops, finally finding one that sold ready made clothing and advertised that they tailor custom garments. Elder Evana and I examined the holo portfolio and I found a dress that was absolutely perfect. The woman who owned the shop helped me pick out fabrics and took my measurements. I also commissioned, at Evan's suggestion, capes for Canderous and me to wear with our armor during the ceremony. I made my deposit, gathered my purchases, and we exited the shop, heading to the financial district.

I found the small private bank my parents had used, and went in. The attendant pointed the way to the vault. I went through a retinal scan checkpoint, got on a lift, and went down I don't know how many levels. Exiting the lift, I passed another security scan, this time of my palm, and just before entering the vault area, suffered a quick poke to the finger for a DNA check. I was glad security was so tight, but not thrilled with all the poking, prodding and electronic invasion of privacy. I had left Elder Evana and Dax up in the lobby. I appreciated their company, but wanted to be alone when I emptied my lockbox.

I punched in the code to call up my box, and soon it arrived on the small lift at the back of the room. Another code opened the secure container, and I gazed down at all that was left of my childhood and parents.

There wasn't much, really. My parents' wedding rings and marriage contract, my birth records, an album of holos, a couple pieces of jewelry. A pouch, containing gemstones and gold. I had converted my parents' estate into this, and had added to it over the years; sort of my retirement plan. Gold and gems never depreciate in value, are relatively easy to convert, and are portable. I'd seen too many financial institutions fail to want to trust them. I wasn't wildly wealthy, but I wasn't bad off either. I collected the small bag, putting it carefully in my credit pouch. The documents I slipped into a pocket, along with the jewelry. The album I put into a satchel I'd purchased at the market square.

The last items in the box made me pause, and swallow. Three light sabers. Dad had fought with one in each hand, and had taught that technique to me. Mom used only one, but it had been extra long, and tweaked to be a more powerful blade. His blades were blue, almost the color of Mom's eyes. Mom's 'saber was an intense golden yellow, like concentrated sunlight. I ran my fingers over the hilts, not removing them for a moment. Then I carefully placed them one at a time in the bag, slinging it bandolier style across my chest. 'Sabers aren't particularly heavy, but I felt their weight against my hip as I headed back to the lobby. It was sort of comforting, like having my parents nearby.

I got out of the lift and smiled at Dax and Elder Evana. Something must have showed on my face, because Dax looked at me sharply.

"Everything all right, Jennet?" he rumbled at me.

"I'm fine, Dax," I assured him.

Then I staggered, feeling an invisible blow smash across my head. I probably would have fallen if Dax hadn't seen me falter and grabbed my elbow to steady me. I looked up at him, eyes wide and startled.

"Canderous," I gasped. "He's hurt."

I bolted out the door, following where I'd felt him last. Dax was at my heels, and I had a sudden guilty thought of Elder Evana, left alone in the lobby of the bank. I needn't have worried; a quick glance showed me she wasn't too far behind, waving us on with a breathless shout that she'd catch up. Dax shouted something about a comlink. I ignored it and poured on the speed. I couldn't hear Canderous's voice in my head. I could tell he'd been knocked out, and was getting flashes of confused dream images. I zeroed in on his location, and ran faster. Dax had been keeping up well, his long legs easily keeping up with my shorter stride. But I had him on stamina and speed; he was losing ground.

I rounded a corner, and stopped short. Canderous was moving; I tracked him going toward the docks. Whoever had him was trying to get off planet. Dax nearly ran me down as he barreled around the turn. I said shortly, "Docks," and headed that direction at a dead run. I heard him talking into his comlink as he struggled to catch me up, probably advising Elder Evana where we were headed.

I knew when it was too late; we had just passed the checkpoint to the docks when I felt Canderous leaving rapidly. He was still unconscious, aboard a ship that I didn't have a clue about, heading to Gods know where in the galaxy. I ran faster, trying to find the space traffic control room. Finally locating it, I burst in, Dax right behind me.

"How many ships just took off from here? Did they file their destinations?" I barked at the startled controllers.

One of them glared at me, not getting up from his chair. "Look lady, I don't know who you are, but you're not authorized to be in this room. Get out or I'll call security."

"Please," I said, rapidly switching tactics. "My husband has been kidnapped, and I know they just took off. I didn't get a good look at the ship, and I need to know who they are and where they're going. Please help me," and I burst into noisy tears. Crying almost always works; most men will do whatever you want just to make you stop.

The controller's face lost its glare and he looked distinctly uncomfortable. "Calm down, ma'am. Six ships have taken off in the last five minutes." He gave me the information on a small datapad. I pocketed it, tearfully thanking him.

"I'm going to go report this," I said in a helpless simper. "Thank you so much."

"No problem, ma'am," the controller said, still looking uneasily at my tears. "Hope you find your husband."

I nodded and got out of there. My tears magically stopped the instant we were out of earshot of the control room. Dax looked like he would have liked to laugh, if things weren't so distinctly unfunny at the moment. I gave him an ironic lift of an eyebrow.

"He's off planet now," I said grimly. "And still unconscious. We need to get in touch with the camp, and find Elder Evana."

"Right here, dear." She bustled up. "He's gone?" she asked, seeing my face.

"Yes. But I'm going to get him back," I said, steel in my voice.

"Of course you are," Elder Evana assured me. "Let's contact the camp."

We found a public communications system, and I got a hold of Jarxel. Rapidly telling him what happened, he swore savagely, and promised to have the Ebon Hawk and its crew up to us within the hour. I told him where we were docked ourselves and signed off. I swore in every language I knew; Dax put a comforting hand on my arm as the three of us headed back to the docks.

"You'll find him," he said seriously. "You two are linked, there's no place far enough they can go that you can't follow. They obviously want him alive, or they wouldn't trouble to take him off planet."

"You're right," I sighed. "What I'm worried about is what they'll do to him in the meantime. Whoever 'they' are."

I was monitoring Canderous, keeping my senses wide open. He was still out cold, and suddenly I remembered something he'd said when he first suggested we were Mates. I stopped with the recollection. Dax and Elder Evana walked a pace or two before realizing I was no longer next to them. I was concentrating hard, following our link, and feeding healing down it. After a moment, I felt him stir, then awaken.

_What the fuck? _I heard him think confusedly.

_Don't show them you're awake yet, _I cautioned. _We're getting the 'Hawk up here so we can follow. Are you okay?_ I asked unnecessarily. I knew physically he was fine; I just wanted to hear him tell me it.

_I'm fine, Wildcat. I'm restrained, though, strapped to some sort of stretcher. What the fuck happened?_

_I don't know exactly. I just felt you get hit by…something, and knew whoever did it had taken you to a ship and took off. I missed you by minutes._

_I think they used a stun grenade. From what I can see without letting them know I'm awake, this is a small cargo ship, like a lot of bounty hunters use. But with the exchange off my back, I couldn't tell you who would put a price on my head._

_Well, you did tell me there were other people that wanted you dead, _I thought resignedly. _Any ideas who would want you alive?_

_Several, _he said ironically. _But most are dead._

_Thanks, that cleared things up nicely. _I said coldly.

_I'd name names, Wildcat, but it'd take a while. Probably be better to just let them take me wherever they're going. That way, we can eliminate the threat at its source._

_Good idea._ I thought brightly. _And I can kill them. _

_Gods, I love you woman._

_I love you too. We'll be along within the hour, _I promised. _We'll follow, but not overtake. Let's see who's behind this._

I reported the conversation to Elder Evana and Dax while we waited for the Ebon Hawk to arrive. I paced and talked to Canderous as the minutes ticked by. Finally, she landed and the three of us boarded. The entire honor guard was there, including Jarxel, to my surprise. Canderous grunted in my head.

_Tell him to get his ass back to Dxun; I need him there, not running after me._

I opened my mouth to more diplomatically convey this message when Jarxel glared at me.

"Tell him to save your breath; I'm going, and that's final. I've left Zuka in charge, and the Elders will be there. Elder Evana, Jenks here will pilot you back to Dxun. We'll let you know when we have the Mandalore back." Jarxel said politely.

She nodded, touched my arm in farewell, and left with Jenks.

I just looked at him. "How did you know what I was going to say?" I demanded.

"I know you're talking to Canderous, and I know what he'll say. He's a damned stubborn bastard, but so am I, and I'm not the one that's kidnapped. He can find himself a new XO if he doesn't like it." Jarxel scowled at me, as if Canderous could see him.

Canderous growled in my head. I shushed him.

"I'm not going to argue with either of you," I said tartly. "Let's just get going."

"Sure thing," Atton said. "Where?"

Good question. I scowled. "I need a map," and called up the local navigation charts on the common room table. "Okay, we're here," I pointed, and concentrated on Canderous. "He's heading that way," I pointed.

"Have they hit hyperspace yet?" Atton asked, his face set in concerned lines. "Can you track him if they do?"

"I think so," I answered tersely. "I haven't had to try before, but Canderous said distance shouldn't matter."

"All right then. You man the chart, comm me if they change course. The plan is to follow, not overtake, yes?"

"Right," I confirmed.

The next few hours were awful. I stayed at the chart, eyes fixed on the course I felt Canderous was following. I felt it when they hit hyper drive and alerted Atton. Ladria pressed a glass of water on me, and Bao Dur shoved some food under my nose. I ate, but didn't taste a thing.

Canderous had officially awakened now, and reported he was alone in a med bay, and from what little he could see was likely in a Hawk class ship. Of the owners, he had seen no sign. He could hear faint voices occasionally, but no one was checking on the prisoner. His frustration with being restrained and helpless was nearly overwhelming. Whoever had taken him was efficient; they had hit him, strapped him to an air gurney, and had him on the ship and heading off planet in minutes. They had been smart enough to use extra heavy duty strapping as well; he was trussed tight with barely enough slack to breathe.

I concentrated on keeping the link open, and where they were going. According to the nav charts, there were quite a few planets they could be heading to: Nar Shadaa and Tatooine among them. I didn't relish going to either place, but at least they were relatively known to us. There were a few smaller planets they could be headed, most of which I knew little about.

There was a sudden jerking in my head and Canderous's link was down to sporadic dream flashes again. I snapped my head up.

"They put him out," I said. "Must have used a hypo spray."

"Can you still tell where he is?" Jarxel asked tensely.

I touched a spot on the map. "Right here."

Jarxel looked at the spot critically. "There's a moon there, not far from Tatooine. I'm betting they're landing there."

I closed my eyes and tried to reach Canderous, sending healing down the line. He stirred faintly, then came slowly awake as I fed him energy. I talked to him, and again he pretended to be out. With a little concentration, I could see a bit through his eyes, which he kept just barely slit open. It was a strange feeling. During battle, things move quickly; I have to adjust fast or die. This time, it was a slow adjustment. Unlike when we shared battle ecstasy, I could either see through his eyes, or my own, not both. I watched as two men, one a Mandalorian that looked familiar, approached. I felt Canderous's rage at the sight of him, and he projected a name at me. It was a huge effort for him to maintain the pretense of being out.

The Mandalorian activated the gurney they had Canderous bound to and they took him out of the ship. I got a quick glimpse of bright sun and what looked like a private airstrip before having to pull back. I reported to Atton where we should land, and sat for a moment, head in my hands, breathing deep and trying to regain my equilibrium.

Our normal link is comforting and natural, sometimes invigorating. During battle, the ecstasy gives us both strength. This far out without the adrenal rush of physical activity, it was draining. I could maintain the purely mental connection with little strain, but seeing through his eyes and healing him was an effort that I couldn't maintain too long. With little appetite but knowing I needed every scrap of energy I could store, I went to the galley, got myself some more food and a big mug of water, and made myself eat. The fuel helped, but I felt a little queasy as reaction was starting to kick in. I grimly ignored it.

The effort to keep my dinner down suddenly became nearly unbearable as a wave of pure pain rolled through me, dropping me to my knees. I barely managed not to scream, and clutched my stomach, keeping from vomiting by sheer force of will. Dax saw me fall and was by my side a moment later, trying to help me up. I shook him off violently, too agonized to be touched. I got control of my gag reflex just as another bolt of pain shot through my upper body, then I felt an invisible blow across the face, once, twice, three times, followed by a bruising punch to the gut. I barely had time to catch my breath when the lightning bolt of agony slammed through my body again. I grayed out, trying to assimilate the sensations.

When I came back to my senses, I was ringed around by grim faces. Hands pulled me to my feet. I stood, a little shaky, but okay. Canderous was out for the moment; I didn't have the control yet to heal him.

"They're torturing him," Jarxel said. It wasn't a question. I nodded mutely. He looked grim, and no one seemed to know what to say. "You need to block yourself," he said finally. "You can't help him if you're knocked off your feet or otherwise incapacitated."

"I can't block completely, or I won't be able to find him," I pointed out. "And I hate to tell you, but a Mandalorian is involved. I didn't get a chance say so before. I caught a glimpse of what Canderous was seeing; he was pissed as hell when he recognized this man."

Jarxel stared at me, his face blank. "Did you get a name?" he asked in a deadly calm voice.

I nodded. "Travik."

Jarxel, Kex, and the other guard members swore colorfully; only Dax didn't seem to have a reaction. I looked around, knowing there was a story here but not understanding. I caught Dax's eye and he shrugged, as lost as me.

"Anyone want to tell me what's going on?" I asked crisply.

"Travik had a run in with Canderous a few years back," Jarxel explained. "Challenged him for the Helm, even. We all thought the Mandalore was foolish to let Travik live, but he insisted that our numbers were small enough that every man was needed. Travik had been defeated, and agreed not to challenge Canderous again. Until today, it seemed to work. Apparently, Travik got a hold of someone that wants Canderous to suffer before he dies."

"How would he know that, and who could it be?" I demanded.

"Travik was one that scouted for Mandoa survivors, and did mercenary work on the side. He got around; if someone had a bounty on Canderous, he had the opportunity to find out. In fact, he had only gotten back from a job a few days before your arrival. My bet is he had planned to wait for an opportunity to take him away from the camp, and the hunter he's with has been on Onderon for some time, just looking for an opening," Jarxel growled. "Travik had a small shuttle he used to go back and forth to Onderon. He must have slipped up here shortly after Canderous left to find Jennet."

I felt Canderous abruptly awaken, probably by a bucket of water dashed over him. I took a deep breath, and tuned in.

_Get out of my head, Jennet. I don't want you here, _He ground out at me.

_Tough. If you block me too much, you'll wish Travik killed you after I'm done with you. I have to track you, and I won't leave you alone._

_Dammit woman, I won't have you hurt. I can feel how it's affecting you; stay the hell away._

_No, _I told him stubbornly. _And don't you shut me out._

He did.

"Gods _damn_ him, stubborn moron!" I bellowed.

The chattering around me stopped, and everyone stared at me. I went back to the map and jabbed a finger at the moon displayed there.

"This is the closest I can figure he's at. He's blocking me now," I gritted through my teeth. "I'm going to kill him."

Jarxel smiled. "You're his Mate, all right," he said with grim humor. "Only a wife would want to rescue and murder him at the same time."

"You don't?" I asked, smiling unwillingly.

"Well, yes," he admitted. "Let's land, and go get that worthless leader of ours."


	38. Chapter 38

We were still some distance away. Twice during the rest of the flight I was hit with pain, but it was almost ghostlike; Canderous was blocking well. Apparently, he couldn't keep it all from me when in serious pain. I used each incident to try and pinpoint where he was. In between, I studied the datapad I had gotten from the space traffic controllers.

Only one Hawk class had taken off, the Scarlet Raptor. According to the records, the owner/pilot was Regar Dunne. That could be true, or not; either way the name meant nothing to me. I had been in the bounty trade, but had few acquaintances and none I would call friend. The really good hunters often were relatively unknown even by others in the trade; being anonymous was a huge advantage. Some, such as Mira, were just so good that they get famous, or infamous as the case may be, whether they wanted the reputation or not. I myself was middling ground; good at it, but I didn't seek out the spectacular captures, or take enough jobs to be widely known. But among the strange little world of bounty hunting, I had a solid reputation, and a good track record.

I ran the information by Mira, and Jarxel, and failing that, the general populace. I also commed Atton, who seemed to know personally, or by reputation, an amazing collection of both respectable and seedy characters. No one had heard of the Scarlet Raptor, or Regar Dunne. I was inclined to think that the ship was legit, the owner's name not; it's harder to hide the registration of a vehicle than a person, weirdly enough. It was entirely possible Regar Dunne was the actual name of the actual owner of the ship, and the bounty hunter was simply using the name for convenience, or had killed the owner and taken the ship, or a million other possibilities that were getting me nowhere. I realized I was using my habit of over-thinking to distract myself from worrying about Canderous.

Finally, we arrived and I was able to tell Atton where to set down. We gathered in the common area. It was standing room only with all thirteen of us crowded around. I asked Bao Dur to scan the area, and we located a large estate deep in a wooded area about two klicks from where we had landed. We were able to ascertain about eighty people on the grounds, about half inside the structure itself.

"Not even as many as were on the Ravager," commented Mira. I nodded.

"Yeah, but we were able to board her with a shuttle," Atton pointed out. "This place has security we have to get through first."

Bao Dur snorted. "There isn't a shield I can't get through, and we can get by most electronic security. We're six and a half Jedi, and seven Mandalorian warriors, what's that against eighty, especially if they're spread out?"

"Don't get too cocky, Padawan," Ladria warned, but she was smiling.

"I have a better idea," I said. "I give myself up at the gate, find Canderous, heal him, and we fight our way out while you guys fight your way in."

There was a storm of protest at that. Dax yelled that Canderous would kill him if he, Dax, allowed me to go in alone, Kex said absolutely he would see me in hell before I did such a damn foolish thing, and Mira looked ready to throw me into the cargo hold and lock me in. But Ladria, and interestingly, Jarxel, were nodding slowly and I focused on them.

"They'll disarm me, sure, but I can fight barehanded, and I can recover my weapons, probably, or pick up some. They can't stop me from healing Canderous, and if I can free him, we fight better together and can take on quite a few until you get to us. Time it right, and you'll be there before things get too hairy, anyway. Plus, they might believe that I just ran after him without backup," I said earnestly.

"It's ballsy, and it has a good shot at working," Jarxel said thoughtfully.

"Travik will never believe that I let you go alone," Dax said loudly. "He knows about your link, and that I was there on Onderon when Canderous was taken. He won't believe you got away from me and just took off; he'd reason you brought the Ebon Hawk here; the shuttles wouldn't make it this far."

"Fine, you come with me, then. I just hope they don't kill you on the spot; they'll keep me alive at least long enough to kill me in front of Canderous. Whoever has him wants him to suffer; they won't care about you," I pointed out.

"All the more reason to go," Dax snarled. "Trying to kill me might be distraction enough for you to get to the Mandalore."

"Fine," I snapped, pissed beyond measure at the thought of losing another friend.

"We're getting nowhere sniping at each other," Ladria said sternly, before I could get a real head of steam going. Dax snapped his mouth shut on whatever reply he was going to make. "Jennet will go in the front gate with Dax; hopefully they'll take both of them in to where Canderous is. If it looks like they won't, fight your way to him however you can. I'll lead the Jedi on an assault from the East side of the complex, Jarxel the Mandalorians from the West. We have plenty of grenades; that should blow the walls. Any questions?"

No one spoke. Ladria nodded. "Right, let's do this. Jennet, you and Dax go on ahead. We'll give you five minutes, and follow through the woods."

I gave her a short nod, and headed out of the 'Hawk with Dax.

It didn't take long to get to the gates. We approached, bold as brass, and the guards surrounded us immediately, blasters at the ready. I had my hands carefully away from my weapons, face blank. Dax glowered.

"You must be the Mandalore's little whore," one of the guards sneered. I was _so_ tired of being called that. I looked at him, memorizing his face. He was a burly dark man, on the short side, and looked like a small Bantha. Dax growled something under his breath.

"I'm Jennet Jax. I'm here to bargain for Canderous Ordo's life," I said calmly.

"Frisk them," Bantha-boy said, and one of the guards eagerly pawed me, removing my swords, my father's light sabers, and three daggers. He missed one and I carefully didn't smile. Apparently molesting a woman makes one stupid; he didn't check behind my neck. They took Dax's weapons as well, and led us into the complex. I managed not to breathe a sigh of relief that they hadn't killed Dax out of hand.

I reached out for Canderous and felt him ahead. He was unconscious, so he couldn't block me. I sent some healing at him slowly, enough to mend the worst of the damage. I felt him stir, and before he could block me, I sent a thought.

_I'm here, Dax is with me, and the rest of them will be attacking soon. Don't let them know you're awake yet, and don't BLOCK ME ANYMORE YOU MORON!_

_Glad to hear you too Wildcat, _he said, resigned. _Don't do anything stupid._

_Too late for that, idiot, I already said I'd marry you._

That got a wry chuckle in my head.

_I'm going to heal you, and you're going to let me. Just don't let on that I did, okay?_

_Right. Did I give you the impression that I lost some IQ points somewhere along the way? _He growled at me. _I have a slight clue about surprise attacks, you know._

_Don't push it, you're credits aren't too good right now._

_Just get me the hell off this gurney, and we'll see how my credit is._

We arrived in what seemed to be a receiving hall. Travik was standing to the right of a man seated on a thronelike chair in a raised alcove. I counted a total of twelve men, including the one seated. Canderous was front and center, several instruments on a table nearby. I suppressed a shudder at what they had been used for. Canderous himself was a mess; blood soaked the front of his shirt, one eye was swollen shut, and his nose was broken – again. I tried to go to him, but two guys grabbed me. I had known they would, and put on a good show of struggling with them, subsiding after a moment. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Dax similarly restrained. The man who had taken our weapons put them down on another table about ten feet behind me. I marked where the 'sabers were and faced the dais.

"You must be Jennet," the seated man said pleasantly. "I'm so glad you could join us."

"Who the fuck are you?" I asked rudely.

"Falken Rikes, my dear lady. I'm a past associate of Canderous's," he said, ever so polite.

He was a slender man, but I could see he was well muscled, and when he stood, it was with the grace of a warrior. He had thinning hair between blond and brown, worn long enough to tie back with a thong. His clothes weren't showy, but were fine quality and fit beautifully. His eyes were gray and colder than the Hutt's I blew up. I began to wonder if I hadn't been stupid after all to come in here.

He nodded to the thug standing near the table of torture, who picked up a bucket of water and threw it in Canderous's face. Canderous spluttered and realistically jerked 'awake'.

"Look who has joined us, Mandalore," Rikes said silkily. "Your little Mate."

Canderous glared at him, snarling suggestions about what Rikes could do with himself, most of which were biologically impossible. I tried not to laugh. Rikes just smiled, and nodded again. The thug grabbed an electric prod and shoved it into Canderous's side. The roar of pain was deafening, and everyone stood still for a moment. Except me.

I sagged against the two holding me, who had unwisely loosened their grip, yanked my arms free, and leaped back as they turned toward where I had been. I grabbed the dagger behind my neck and slashed it across the face of the one on the right. I was grimly pleased that it was Bantha-Boy; teach him to call me names. With a spinning kick, I smacked the one on my left into his bellowing buddy and ran to the table that held my weapons, stowing the bloody dagger as I went. I grabbed the 'sabers, whirled around, cut down the one that had followed me, strode forward, and silenced Bantha-boy forever. Then I ran for Canderous.

Dax meanwhile had taken advantage of the distraction to yank hard against his guards, stepping back and smashing their heads together. He grabbed a blaster off one as they fell, shot them both, and started pumping energy bolts left and right. I dove for the gurney, and sliced through the straps holding Canderous down. He hadn't been wearing armor, but did have a shield strapped to his wrist; as soon as he was free he slapped it on, and waded into the brawl. We kept back to back and somewhere along the way he managed to grab a sword, and reach behind him to snag my dagger.

As we danced through the thinning crowd, I saw Dax go down and threw some healing his way. He shook off the blow that had felled him and jumped up, smashing a foot into the gut of the thug who had hit him. The man staggered back, and Dax shot him between the eyes.

I couldn't see where Falken had gone, and in any case was too busy to try and find him. Canderous and I took out two more, including Travik, and I felt Canderous's savage satisfaction in dispatching the betrayer. Suddenly there wasn't anyone left to fight. The three of us tracked around the room, counting the bodies. Eleven, and Falken was nowhere to be found. We recovered the rest of our weapons, and then I spotted a door behind the throne on the dais. As one we ran over to it, yanking it open. Dax lead, me and Canderous right behind. We found ourselves in a long corridor, with a door at either end. Before we had time to choose, the one farthest away burst open, and Bao Dur came barreling in, the other six Jedi on his heels.

"This way!" I shouted, and ran for the other door.

It opened into a large windowless storage room. Another door lead out of it, and I was there in seconds. Locked. Canderous shoved me out of the way and smashed his foot against it; the door held but the wood of the frame splintered. One more kick and we were through.

There was a pitched battle taking place in the courtyard we ran out into. All the Mandalorians were blasting away at about forty men. Ladria and the others threw themselves into the fray. I spotted Falken across the yard, now armed. He turned toward us and smiled, his hand in a farewell salute.

"Another time," he mouthed at me and Canderous.

"I don't fucking think so," I snarled, ran forward, and threw my light saber at him with all my strength.

I don't know why I did it, and had no idea if it would work. I was about twenty feet away when I hurled the 'saber, and I was drawing on the Force completely without conscious thought. The beam of blue light flew like a boomerang, sideways, and struck him in the chest. A look of pure surprise was on Rikes' face as he fell. My 'saber fell to the ground, blade snuffing out.

He was still alive when Canderous and I reached him, wheezing and clutching his chest. I picked up my 'saber, and looked at the fallen man. He glared at me, struggling to his feet.

"Your Mate killed my wife and children, and turned me in to the Exchange," he snarled at me. "You protect a killer."

"Because torture and kidnapping and attempted murder is so much better," I said quietly. "I know what he was. I know what he is now. What you are, you did yourself." I turned my back on him, and walked away. There was a sound behind me, and I whirled, igniting my 'saber to block the dagger that Rikes had thrown at me. Simultaneously, a shot rang out, and Rikes fell, dead. I looked around, and Dax lowered his weapon. Canderous had neatly skewered Rikes at the same time. Three times dead, that one.

"Thanks," I said.

Dax nodded. Canderous shook his hand, and we surveyed the damage. Bodies were everywhere, but no one on our side was seriously hurt. I felt healing energy going around, and checked out Kex. He was grinning from ear to ear, loudly exclaiming how good it was to fight properly again. I smiled at his enthusiasm.

"Well," Disciple said thoughtfully, "that didn't take long."

"Any survivors?" Ladria asked quietly.

"We haven't gone through the place room by room, but I doubt there's anyone left," I said, equally quiet.

"Who was that guy?" Mira asked curiously.

"Someone I turned in to the upper echelon of the Exchange," Canderous said simply. "They sent me to kill him; I thought I had."

"He must have been pretty evil for the Exchange to want him dead," Atton observed.

"Into every illegal vice you can think of," Canderous said. "Not that that bothers the Exchange much; they only care if you're cheating them, or trying to take over. He was doing both."

"And what he said about his wife and children?" Visas asked quietly. "I know you didn't kill them, who did?"

Canderous stared at her. "I appreciate the vote of confidence, but what makes you so sure?"

"You forget, Canderous, I am a Seer. I felt the lie in his words when he spoke them," Visas said softly.

"He had every reason to believe I had," Canderous said shortly. "I might have, if things had gone differently. As it was, when I got there, they were already dead, and Rikes was gone. I tracked him down later, we fought, and I was sure he was dead when I left."

"He was assassin trained," Atton said flatly. "They have tricks that can make you appear dead."

Canderous looked sharply at Atton, then nodded. "He was, yes. You could tell?"

"Yes," Atton said shortly, and turned away.

I had remained silent during the conversation. I had not believed Canderous had killed Rikes' family, but a part of me was relieved to know I had been right.

_Don't worry Wildcat, I don't blame you for doubting._

_I wasn't…_

_You were, a little. It's okay. I'm not a good person._

_You are! _I thought fiercely.

_I am when I'm with you. Maybe._ _I'm glad you think I am. Someday I might be._

_Stubborn, irritating… Mandalorian!_

_You got a problem with that?_

I walked away, breathing through my nose and trying not to hit him. To cover my irritation, I started frisking the bodies.

"Good idea," Jarxel said, and the rest of the party followed suit. Disciple said he was going to go check out the house, Kelborn, Xarga, and Mira joined him. Seeing Mira disappear into the house, Dax hurried to catch them up. The rest of us finished up and followed them inside.

There was a lot of portable wealth in the house; we debated looting, and decided to on a limited basis. Disciple made an interesting discovery in the private office off the master bedchamber. Falken Rikes liked to keep a journal, apparently. Canderous took a few of the datapads Disciple had brought out and scanned them. After a short time, he handed them back.

"Burn them," he said. Disciple looked startled, and a little disapproving.

"They're monstrous, yes, from what I read," he said, protesting. "But they give invaluable insight into the mind of a purely sociopathic personality. These diaries may help catch others like him."

"Or it might give someone just as twisted ideas," Canderous growled.

"I'll do as you say, if you insist," Disciple said quietly. "But I think you're wrong."

Canderous looked at him, clearly assessing what the blonde Jedi had said. Finally, he shrugged.

"Keep them, if you think they're helpful. Just don't expect me to read them." He turned to the rest of our friends. "I haven't thanked you all for the rescue," he said, clearly uncomfortable, but standing straight, and obviously sincere.

Ladria smiled. "No thanks among friends," she chided gently. "You'd do the same for any of us."

A look of surprise went over his face and he stood very still. "Yeah," he said after a moment, "I would."

I squeezed his arm, wordlessly, and he smiled down at me. "Let's go home, Wildcat."


	39. Chapter 39

**Canderous**

The flight back to Dxun took a while. The Ebon Hawk was packed; fifteen on board was too much. I was in the common area with Jennet, Visas, Ladria, Bao Dur, Jarxel, Kelborn, and Disciple. The historian was reading Rikes' diaries, mumbling things like "Fascinating" and "Brilliant" under his breath every so often, and once in a while reading aloud things he found particularly interesting. Finally, I glared at him.

"Son, I just started to really like you. Don't make me regret saying so out loud." I was giving him my stare that usually makes people walk away quickly.

Disciple didn't look afraid, but he did flush a little. "Sorry," he said, and wandered off to read where it didn't bother me.

I'd spent only a few hours in Rikes' company this time but I didn't need to read his journals to know how twisted he had been. He was a cold remorseless bastard when I knew him before; the years had made him worse. He hadn't been sane, and he had enjoyed torturing me. Before Jennet arrived, he had described in detail what he had planned on doing to her; gang rape was just the beginning.

No, I didn't regret his death, only that it had been too quick. I didn't need to hear what else he had done.

I also didn't want to read or listen to them because it was too close to what I might have become. I knew it would probably be good for me to read through them eventually. Facing down the worst of who you are, or could have been, is the best way to exorcise that part of you. I wasn't ready to yet, though. I still thought it would be better to simply destroy the journals, but maybe Disciple had a point, and some good could come of them.

Jennet was staying close to me, not speaking, even mentally. She healed the rest of my hurts without comment, and I had showered and ran my clothes through the laundry. She was following her usual pattern of getting the job done, and quietly going to pieces after. She didn't shake or throw up, much to my relief, but she was reluctant to let me out of her sight. I understood; if it had been the other way around I wouldn't have let her go to the 'fresher alone for at least a day. I let her work things out on her own; she didn't seem to need or want my reassurances, only my presence.

I also knew she was still mad at me for shutting her out. That was something that we were going to have out, eventually. I didn't regret it a bit, and she knew it. I can't protect her from most things, but I could keep her safe from the worst they did to me. I was reasonably certain she would have done the same. So I waited patiently for the eventual explosion. I knew she wouldn't want to start a fight with me in front of everyone, so I took care not to provoke her. One wrong look or word and she wouldn't care if she skinned me alive in a marketplace at high noon. I do love that about her.

The chatter around us was lively, and people were wandering in and out. I was thinking about how to get the rest of the Mandoa population to Dxun, and discussing it with Jarxel. Jennet listened for a while, then finally secure that I was safe, got up and left the main cabin. I gave her about five minutes, then followed.

I found her in the cargo hold, alone. I was surprised at that; there were people all over the small ship. But the energy coming off Jennet was such that anyone with sense would avoid her. What that said about me, I refused to think about.

"Hey, Wildcat." I touched her arm, and she turned to me with a tight smile.

"Hey yourself." She looked away.

"Do you want to yell now, or wait 'til we're back on Dxun, with soundproofed walls?"

She snorted, and glared at me. "Would it do any good?"

"Probably not. Might make you feel better, though." I eyed her. This wasn't a mood I'd seen her in before, exactly. She was mad, sure, even without our bond I could see it. But she wasn't yelling, or wanting to hit anything. She was simply seething quietly, and I wasn't sure how to deal with that.

"I'm not going to apologize for blocking you," I finally said, simply to provoke some sort of response.

"I know," she said. "I'm not mad about that."

I looked at her, surprised. "You're not?"

"Well, yeah, I am, but since I would have done the same, I'll get over it." She looked thoughtful. "I'm mad because you don't trust yourself. And by extension, me."

"What the hell does that mean?" I asked. I was not only surprised by her statement, but starting to get irritated.

"This bond we have…it lets me in your head in ways I couldn't imagine were possible," Jennet said.

I looked at her, trying to see where this was going. She wasn't blocking me, but her own thoughts were confused enough that I wasn't picking through the tangle well. So I just eyed her, not without some suspicion because I had a feeling I wasn't going to like what she had to say, and waited for her to make herself clear.

She seemed to understand that, and looked at me, straight on. "I've seen more of what you were than you think I have," she said, her brown eyes serious and troubled. "I know, I think, how far you sank into rage and despair, how close you were to going to the dark side forever." She put up a hand as I started to speak. "You can't ever be Jedi, I know, but everyone lives by the Force, whether they know it, believe in it, or not. And everyone has the choice to live by the dark or light side. Some are born evil; I really believe that. Some are born so good they're never in question as to what side they're on. Most of us get there by choices."

She looked up at me, and I realized that along with her anger, which in any case was fading, she was sad; not pity, but a deep well of compassionate sorrow. I shifted uncomfortably, and looked away. Suddenly, I wished she was just blazing mad at me; this I didn't like at all.

"You don't trust that you're a good person, a compassionate man, or worthy to be mine," she said softly. "You don't trust yourself to come through for me as I have for you, either. When I was stupid and nearly died, you blamed yourself for not being able to heal me. You're mad that you fell into Rikes' hands, and I had to come get you. And you're starting to think that when it comes to it, I don't need you, and you can't do for me what I've done so far for you."

"What makes you think that?" I growled.

"Oh, please. You're very good at burying your feelings, but I have an inside track to your head. I'm sorry if this seems like I'm exploiting it, but you're not being honest with yourself, entirely. You really are wondering what I'm getting out of it, or if I'm with you because I see you as some sort of redemption project. Well, I don't. I didn't ask to be your Mate, but I am. And if the Force chose me, it's because you deserve it, and need it. As I deserve and need you. I did the best I could without you, but I had no direction, no home, few friends, and no one that I trusted to understand. _You_ gave me that."

"And in return, I nearly get myself killed by a Hutt, have to watch while others heal you after saving my ass, put you on trial, get you into a duel, and put you in danger because my past caught up with me," I said bitterly. "How do you deserve all that?"

She looked at me seriously. "Do you know what I thought, when I saw you in the cantina, just before I got knocked out?"

"What?"

"I thought, oh, there you are." She said quietly. "I didn't know why, but I saw you standing there, and had to get you out of the way of the plasma blast. I knew, just for that second, that you were mine, somehow. I didn't remember thinking that for a while. When you told me about Mates, I fought it at first, not because I didn't want it, but because nothing I'd tried before worked out, and I didn't want, this time, to lose that sense of belonging again. I knew, deep down, that losing you would break me."

"Having me is not helping your chances at a long and peaceful life," I said sharply. "I've been nothing but trouble, and it's not likely to stop."

"And that's where the trust part comes in," she said calmly. "You're not trusting that I want this, or that I know what is best for me. I had a pretty dangerous life before you came along, you think whatever you can get us into is going to bother me? I may not have made as many enemies, but I'm perfectly capable of getting into trouble all by myself. And I trust you to help me out of it, when it happens."

"I will," I said shortly.

"Yes. But most of all, you're not trusting that how I see you is true. I checked your aura the second I opened my eyes back on Nar Shadaa. I knew then that you had done some very bad things, but you _were_ on the side of the Light. It's gotten brighter since, and you think it's because of me. Well, you're wrong. It's because of the choices you're making. You started making them well before you ever met me, or I wouldn't have come with you to the Ebon Hawk."

I was stumped as to what to say. I just stared at her, silent, thoughts churning around in my head. I felt her there, watching, but not commenting. I really would rather her just start yelling and throwing things at me; that I could deal with. But this sense of compassion was unnerving, and I couldn't even find the energy to get angry about it.

"Just think about it, okay?" She stood on tiptoe, and kissed my cheek. "I love you, _all_ of you, and you deserved it from the start. That's what's true."

She left me there, staring at the wall, totally unable to respond.

After a minute, I sat down on a barrel and just thought about things. She was right, but I wasn't ready to admit it, at least not out loud. I _was_ questioning if I was good for her, or deserved to be happy. Happy isn't an emotion I was used to anymore. I couldn't change the things I had done, and if I spent the rest of my life tracking down those I betrayed, or the families of the ones I'd killed, I wouldn't have a spare minute to do anything else. No matter what I might want to do, I could only go forward, and try to help my own people. I hoped it was enough. I realized that there were only two things that scared me now; losing Jennet, and never being worthy of her.

Maybe she was right, and I did deserve her now. I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life trying to, anyway. What I didn't get was she _knew_ what I had been, and it really didn't faze her a bit. I also realized that something like this would take time. I hoped she had patience enough for both of us.

I was about to leave when Bao Dur came in, quiet as a cat.

"Everything okay?" he asked, seeing my face.

"Yeah," I said shortly. "Just thinking."

"Sure," he said, and proceeded to check the cargo area, tightening down a load here and there. I was about to leave when I heard him make a noise of startlement. I turned around to see him step back with a look of surprise. I swiftly moved to his side, and stared.

Hiding behind some containers was a woman and young girl, looking frightened, but defiant. They had made a nest for themselves with a couple of blankets and pillows.

"What the hell - ?" I said, surprised.

"It's okay," Bao Dur said gently to the pair. "We won't hurt you."

The woman stood, keeping herself in front of the child, and spoke in a language I didn't understand. Her voice was low and raspy, barely above a whisper; I wondered if something was wrong with her vocal cords. I glanced over at Bao Dur and saw a look of pure astonishment on his face. He said something I didn't understand, and the woman relaxed a little, but still stood, protecting who I assumed was her daughter. The little girl clung to her mother's skirts. They both were a bit bedraggled and wore simple long tunics, belted with good quality leather, and sandals on their feet. Servant's clothes; I could guess where the pair of them came from.

It occurred to me that perhaps Bao Dur and I weren't the most comforting people to look at; Bao Dur was a gentle soul, but he _was_ big and ferocious looking, and even when I'm in a good mood, I can look fairly scary. I gave the Iridonian a glance and he nodded, understanding what I was thinking.

_Wildcat, I need you and Ladria in here; something's up. _I gave her a mental picture of the stowaways, and felt her surprise.

_On our way, _she answered simply.

The woman was human, and pretty in a fierce sort of way. She wasn't tall, but stood at least eight centimeters taller than Ladria or Jennet. Her long brown hair was in a braid down her back, and she had purple eyes, a startling color, that were currently blazing at Bao Dur. Her daughter looked to be about three, and was a miniature of her mother. They both were frightened, but defiant, and it was obvious the woman was prepared to do anything to defend her child. I was impressed with their courage.

Jennet and Ladria came in, approaching with caution, friendly smiles on their faces. Bao Dur continued to talk to the woman softly. Ladria looked a bit startled at that, and looked from him to the stowaway with some confusion.

"She speaks Iridoni?" She asked in surprise.

"Looks like," the Zabrak said. "I've never met a human that does, not even you."

He said something to her again, and translated her answer. "She says she was a captive of Falken Rikes, her and her daughter. She was afraid when we attacked the compound but figured we were safer than staying, and slipped out while the battle was going on. She found our ship and came aboard, hoping they could sneak away when we got to where we were going."

"Can she speak Galactic Basic?" Ladria asked. Jennet was smiling at the little girl reassuringly, and looking at the woman, trying to project a sense of safety and calm. The woman seemed to understand, but didn't relax much.

"I can," she answered with difficulty. "But not comfortably. Rikes strangled me a month ago; it damaged my throat. Is he really dead?"

"Yes," Jennet confirmed. "He really is. Canderous," she pointed to me, "and our friend Dax killed him. He won't hurt anyone ever again. You're safe with us; no one will harm you or your daughter."

"What is your name?" Ladria asked gently. I saw the woman relax visibly; when Ladria sets out to charm, no one is immune.

"Megari Bar," she said. "My daughter is Danni."

Bao Dur looked even more confused. "How is it as humans you speak Iridoni?"

"I was raised by an Iridoni family," she said in her raspy voice. "When I was no older than Danni, my people were killed by Mandalorian raiders," at this she glared at me. "They were traveling performers, and we were on Iridon when the raiders came. I survived, and was taken in by Dahn Varda and his wife Kana. They moved to Telos to escape the ruins of their planet. I met my husband there."

"Where is he?" Bao Dur asked quietly.

"Dead," Megari said flatly. "Rikes killed him. He was a Telonian militia officer. Rikes came for revenge against the Exchange; the militia arrested him for smuggling before he could do anything. He escaped, hunted down the three officers that had taken him in to custody, and took me and Danni. We've been with him a year."

I could only imagine the hell she'd lived in for the last year, and was impressed all over again that she'd survived relatively unbroken. No one that could face down me and Bao Dur as fiercely as she had was weak. She couldn't have escaped Rikes, as remote as the estate was.

Then it occurred to me that she wouldn't really view Bao Dur as a threat, if she had been raised by an Iridonian family. _I _was the threat; one of the race that killed both her people, and her adopted race. Hell, it might even have _been_ me; I was there on Iridon when the attack was made.

I took a breath, and stood straight. I looked at her, and said as non-threateningly as I could, "I am sorry for what my people did to yours."

She eyed me with deep suspicion. "I doubt that," she said scathingly.

"I don't blame you," I answered.

Bao Dur said something to her, and she looked skeptical. She answered rapidly, and he nodded. She looked at me and said stiffly, "This one says you are a friend, and you are trustworthy. Are you really the leader of your people?"

"Yes," I said simply.

"You are too young to have been so when my people were attacked."

"I took the Helm five years ago," I confirmed. "We are still a warlike people, but I'm trying to channel that to be useful, not merely destructive."

She made a disbelieving noise. "I think you have an impossible task," she observed.

"Possibly. But times are changing," I said, giving her a small smile.

"I will give you the benefit of the doubt," she said generously.

"Thank you," I said gravely. She had spirit, and I saw Jennet smile.

"What can we do to help you?" Ladria asked quietly. Megari looked at her, and shrugged a little helplessly.

"I hadn't thought beyond getting to whatever space port you docked at, and trying to find work. My parents are gone; they died just after my marriage. My husband had no family either. I'm afraid Danni and I have nowhere to go. But we're no longer slaves, and Rikes is dead, so we're better off now than we were yesterday." She gave a fatalistic shrug. "If you allow me to work for you for a time, perhaps I could earn enough to settle us somewhere?"

Ladria smiled. "How about we say you're an honored guest for now, and we'll work something out?"

"There's what we took from Rikes's estate," I pointed out. "If anyone deserves those spoils, I'd say it was Megari here."

She looked down her nose at me. "You can't buy me off," she said, regal as a queen.

"I'm not trying to," I said carefully. "But I knew Rikes, and I have an idea what he put you through. Think of it as back wages."

Bao Dur said, "I think that's fair, and I know everyone will agree."

Ladria nodded. "If Megari agrees, it's done."

"I…" she seemed at a loss for words. "That's very kind," she said finally.

"It's settled, then," Ladria said briskly. "Where would you like us to take you?"

"I don't know," Megari said slowly, purple eyes troubled. "I've only lived on Telos, but there's nothing for me there now."

"Well," Jennet said, "We're going to Dxun now. You're welcome to stay with us as long as you like. It will give you some time to think about what to do next."

"What is on Dxun?" Megari asked, curious. "Where is it?"

"It's a moon near Onderon," Jennet said. "Some of the Mandalorian survivors have a camp there. We're hoping to bring the rest of them together soon and rebuild the people."

Megari's eyes sparked. "Why would I want to live among Mandalorians?" she spat.

"Well," I said easily, "You don't have to. We can stop on Onderon first, and get you set up there. But you're welcome to stay, and I guarantee you will be treated with respect."

"Look," Jennet said with a friendly smile, "I completely understand that staying with us could be uncomfortable, even frightening, for you, and you have no reason to trust Mandalorians. But I am the Mate of the Mandalore, and I can assure you that you'll be perfectly safe and treated well. If anyone mistreats you, which is extremely unlikely, they will answer to me, or Canderous. You have my word."

Megari looked at her, and me, then at Bao Dur. She spoke again in his language, and he answered with a reassuring smile. She looked doubtful, but nodded slowly.

"I accept your hospitality with thanks," she said formally.

"You're more than welcome," Jennet said warmly, and I nodded as well.

Bao Dur touched the woman gently on the arm. "Would you like to come out and meet the rest of the crew?" he asked quietly.

She put her arm protectively around Danni, and shook her head. "I don't wish to seem rude, but this has been a bit overwhelming for us. Would it be terrible of me to stay in here for a while?"

"Of course not," Bao Dur said with a smile. "I'll bring you something more comfortable to sleep on."

"Thank you," Megari said gravely.

The four of us left, and appraised the others of the new development. I warned my men to tread carefully around the new companions, and to be on their best behavior. There were nods all around, and Jarxel looked sober.

"We're getting old, Canderous," he joked grimly. "Since when did we care if someone feared us?"

"Speak for yourself," I answered with a smile. "I still don't. But I'll think of it as a lesson in diplomatic relations. If we're to ally ourselves with the Republic, we'll need some practice."

"I hate diplomacy," he growled.

"Maybe we won't need it," Dax said helpfully. "We could let Jennet speak for us, and they'll surrender just to shut her up."

That got a laugh, and I left my men in the garage, chuckling.


	40. Chapter 40

Author's Note: I'm sorry my updaties have slowed down; I'm working full time now and the previous two weeks have been crazy. I'm a Girl Scout mom, and cookie season just ended. Hopefully, I'll have more time to write now.

Thanks for the reviews; I always appreciate feedback. I apologize that I haven't answered any reviews lately - I'll try to be better, honest! But it does seem that given the choice between me answering reviews, or me writing more of the story, almost everyone would say keep writing. So I'm doing my best.

I'd had a stray thought that Canderous and Jennet are behaving somewhat like an old married couple; understandable with their Mate bond, but only about two weeks have gone by since they met. I _think_ things have progressed more or less logically, but forgive me if a couple of chapters (past and/or future) slow down somewhat; you can't spend _all_ your time running after kidnapped Mates and revenge-driven ex-Exchange officers.

I've thought about where this story will end (sometimes I wonder if it ever _will..._) and I've more or less come to the conclusion that we'll see the wedding, (not trying to give spoilers here, come on, did anyone _really_ think I'd be cruel enough not to let them get married in the end?) and a short epilogue, just to give us a glimpse of the future, and set up a possible spin-off story. Now if our intrepid couple can just stay out of trouble long enough to finish the Trials...

Thanks again, everyone, for the reviews and letters. Please keep them coming!

- LJ

* * *

**Jennet**

_I need a vacation, _I thought to myself as I went in to the galley in search of something to eat. _Maybe Canderous will agree to a nice long honeymoon, somewhere safe and boring. _

The Mandalorians were in the garage with Canderous, so the ship, for the moment, felt almost normal. Visas had retreated to the dorms, Disciple was in the med bay, pouring over Falken Rikes's journals. Atton of course was in the cockpit, Ladria with him. Bao Dur was presumably keeping our newest guests company, and Mira was in the common room, looking over the light saber I had given her. Somewhere along her travels, she had acquired 'saber parts; the blade of the dead Dark Jedi was now a deep violet. Atton had done the same, and his blade was now blue. I'd seen them during the fight at Rikes's complex; they both were very good with their 'sabers.

Mira looked up at me when I came in, a sandwich in one hand and glass of water in the other, and smiled. "How you doing?"

"Tired," I said, and groaned a little as I sat.

"I can imagine," Mira said sympathetically. "Being tortured even second hand has got to be a bitch. I could see tracking Canderous was pretty draining too."

"The tracking wasn't, really; it was the long-distance healing that wore me out," I said, taking a bite out of my sandwich. I chewed, and swallowed. "I think I'm on overload. To think two weeks ago the only worry I had was the Exchange or the Hutt finding me." I gave a sarcastic grin, and finished eating my sandwich.

"Things do seem to happen around people like us," Mira observed. "Half the shit I find myself in I had nothing to do with starting."

"No nice, safe, boring life for us," I agreed.

"Thank the Gods," Mira said feverently. "I'd throw myself into a supernova in a week."

"Me too," I said, smiling. "So, what's the deal with Dax?"

Mira started at the change of subject, and amazingly, came as close to blushing as she ever did. "He's nice," she said, and examined her light saber as if it were the most interesting object in the universe.

I snorted. "He's Mandalorian. 'Nice' isn't in their vocabulary. It's not my business, I know, but you're my friend. I just want to know you're happy, that's all."

"So far," she said with a small smile. "It's nothing like you and Canderous have."

"Be grateful," I said, smiling. "That's no piece of cake either. But I wouldn't change it," I added, smiling dreamily. I sat back, hands behind my head, feet propped on a nearby chair.

"Can I ask you something?" Mira looked at me seriously, and I sat up.

"Sure."

"Was there ever anything between you and Dax?"

It shouldn't have, but the question took me by surprise. I looked at her blankly for a second and shrugged.

"Is there anyone on board that _doesn't_ think I slept with Dax?" I asked rhetorically.

"Megari," Mira said instantly, then smiled. "Actually, I don't think anyone does, really. I know you didn't."

I looked at her in surprise. "You do?" I tried to think back on when the subject had ever come up; both times I'd spoken of Dax in those terms, it had been to Canderous, and we'd been alone.

Her amber eyes were direct. "I asked Dax about it. I also overheard the conversation between you two before he left Telos, at least part of it. So I know you never did."

"Wow, asking directly. Smart idea," I said, only a little sarcastically. I could only imagine the world of frustration I would be living in if I didn't have the mental communication with Canderous. I _am_ direct, and so is he, but not always at the same time.

Mira was still looking at me thoughtfully. I smiled reassuringly, and told her the same thing I'd said to Canderous by Cressa's grave; the only thing between Dax and me had been the ghost of a possibility. Mira nodded, obviously this was what she had expected to hear from me. But her eyes were a little troubled.

"What's this really about?" I asked.

"I don't know, really," she said honestly. "It's just that…well, he talks about you, and he's your Champion. And he insisted on going with you to Rikes's front gate. He admires you and Canderous almost to the point of hero worship. I know he wouldn't try anything…" her voice trailed off a moment. Then she looked straight at me, her hawk's eyes gleaming a bit. "I just won't be anyone's second choice, no matter how much I care. If I am, it's certainly not your fault."

"You're not," I said firmly. "He asked about you, just before he left Telos, when he was giving me a hug goodbye. I told him you could kick his ass in ways I never thought of, and he approved."

"He did?" Her face brightened.

"Yes," I answered. "Look, let me explain a little about the Mandalorian mindset. Dax and I were partners, and yes, at the time we considered taking that a step further. But he didn't pursue when I turned him down. Then a couple months later, I seem to abandon him to the tender mercies of a Hutt. He manages to escape, and spends _four years_ looking for me out of revenge. Upon meeting up with me unexpectedly, he immediately tries to kill me. When All Is Explained, he becomes my Champion."

"There's a point in there, somewhere, right?" Mira asked.

"Yes. Mandalorians don't tend to do things by half. He put himself in the mindset of partner and friend, and he was very good to me as both. He expected the same loyalty and respect in return of what he gave me. When I seemed to betray that, he wasn't going to be satisfied until I was dead. And when it turned out I hadn't abandoned and betrayed him after all, he set out to make up for his own disloyalty of thinking I had." I paused, and Mira was nodding slowly.

"So you're saying that he's not pining away, not just because he wouldn't betray Canderous by making a play for you. That talking about and trying to protect you is simply because he takes your friendship and being your Champion seriously?"

"Exactly. And remember, _I _didn't appoint him Champion; Canderous did. Dax would do anything for the Mandalore." I smiled, and looked at her. "If he's with you, it's because he wants to be, and you're important to him. I've seen him look at you; I'm not even a blip on the nav chart."

She looked happy at that, and the conversation turned to other things. Canderous came in, kissed me briefly, and wandered into the galley to get something to eat. He was even more tired than I was. Shortly afterwards, Visas joined us, and she and Mira decided to make dinner for everyone. We still had a couple of hours before we hit Dxun, and while I really wanted to sleep, I was too keyed up to crash yet. The galley was too small to try and help with dinner, so I stayed where I was, Canderous comfortably beside me, finishing the sandwich he'd made himself.

Dax, Jarxel, and Kex made an appearance, and were told dinner would be ready soon. They looked happy at that. Jarxel and Kex went back to the garage, but Dax remained, talking easily to Canderous and watching Mira when he thought no one was looking. Oh, he was far gone, and I smiled to myself.

I heard Dax ask Canderous a question, and I sat straighter, alert.

"The bounty hunter Travik was with; do you think he's going to be a threat?" Dax looked concerned.

"I doubt it," Canderous answered, and I echoed the thought.

"For most bounty hunters, it's just a job," I said. "He took the commission, caught Canderous, got paid. Nothing personal."

"Rikes paid him as soon as I was brought in, and he left," Canderous said gruffly. "Too bad, though, his ship would have come in handy," he added pragmatically.

"Did you ever find out if Regar Dunne was his real name?" I asked curiously.

"That's what Rikes called him." Canderous said. "Anybody's guess if it really is, though."

"Would you know him if you saw him again?" Dax asked.

"Oh yes," Canderous said grimly. I shivered, but agreed wholeheartedly with the sentiment. I wasn't going to try and hunt Dunne down, but Gods help him if we're ever in the same room together.

"With Falken Rikes dead, it's unlikely Dunne will have reason to cross our path again," I said, a little hopefully. "Unless someone else puts a bounty on you." It was half a question, and Canderous nodded.

"It could happen, Wildcat," he said seriously. "I haven't made many friends, and there's a hell of a lot of people that have reason to hate me. I don't expect there's too many left alive that know my name, though, or could afford a bounty. But I traveled in some pretty dangerous circles for quite some time. The Exchange has let me go, and while I don't entirely trust that organization's word, they aren't likely to pursue revenge; I helped them, after all. The only thing I did against them was with this crew, so if they want revenge, it would be against all of us."

"And they wanted Ladria and her party to fix the rip in the Force, so they're off the hook too," I said thoughtfully.

"Right. I'm not saying I won't be cautious, but I doubt there's much reason to worry."

"I guess not," I said as optimistically as I could.

He kissed me hard, and set me gently away from him. "You worry too much."

"Someone has to," I retorted, but without heat.

Dinner was ready then, and I volunteered to take food in to Bao Dur and our two guests. Visas loaded a tray with four plates, glasses, and flatware, and I carefully took it into the cargo hold. As I left, I saw Mira and Dax taking similarly loaded trays toward the garage. Disciple, Atton and Ladria joined the rest of the crew just as I got to the hallway.

I elbowed the door mechanism, and entered the cargo hold. I almost dropped the tray when I saw the scene before me. Bao Dur and Megari were standing very close together; I could see Danni asleep on the mattress the Iridonian had brought in. Megari was looking at him with a mixture of trust and fear, and he said something too low for me to hear. She went limp, and he gently caught her, laying her down on the mattress next to her daughter.

I set the tray on to a nearby barrel and he looked up, startled. Seeing it was me, he gestured and I went over, bewildered as to what was going on.

"I'm going to try and fix Megari's throat," he said quietly. "I could use your help."

"I wondered about that," I answered. "I was going to offer to try myself, when she got used to me. What did you do?" I waved at the sleeping woman and child, a question in my eyes.

He looked a little uncomfortable. "My language is very complex; I just told her to sleep, that's all."

"I see. Well, what do you need me to do?" I didn't pursue the questions I had, it felt was intrusive.

"Could you keep Danni away for a bit? Just hold her while I tend Megari. She isn't likely to wake up, but I don't want to take the chance." The gentle concern flowing off the big Iridonian was a low electric current in the air.

"Sure," I said simply, and carefully went over to pick the sleeping child up. She was so small, and hardly weighed more than my armor. I cuddled her in my lap a short distance from Bao Dur. She sighed in her sleep, and snuggled. My heart turned over, and suddenly I felt close to tears.

The Zabrak gently arranged Megari so she was flat on her back. He straightened her head, propping it between a couple of rolled pillows so her neck was perfectly straight. Then he took a deep breath, placed a large hand around her throat, and squeezed firmly.

I was tuning in, ready to help if needed. I felt the damaged vocal cords crush again, immediately followed by healing warmth from Bao Dur. Megari's breathing stopped for a heartbeat or two, and I held my breath as well. The healing took, though, and she was breathing again, relaxed and without wheezing. I saw Bao Dur's shoulders slump, and he took his hand away.

"Nice work," I said approvingly. "Couldn't have done it better myself."

"Thanks," he said, not looking at me, but at the woman on the mattress. I smiled. Unless I missed my guess, Bao Dur had found someone to adore besides his General. I wished him luck.

I got up, and lay Danni next to her mother, covering her with a blanket. I patted Bao Dur on the back as I passed, took my dinner off the tray, and quietly left him there, watching the sleeping family.


	41. Chapter 41

**Canderous**

We arrived at Dxun without incident, and all of us staggered to our respective beds, utterly exhausted. Jennet was practically asleep on her feet as we had stumbled through the dark jungle to the camp. It had been nearly 36 hours since any of us had slept. We had paused only long enough to assure the guards that we were unhurt (at least now I was) and to have them alert the Elders of our return. I was so tired I didn't remember undressing and falling into bed.

When I woke, it was late morning. I had slept almost twelve hours and was ferociously hungry. Jennet was stirring next to me, and opened her eyes, blinking sleepily.

"Good morning, cyar'ika," I said, kissing her the rest of the way awake.

"Morning," she mumbled, with a glance at the clock. She kissed me back. Her stomach growled noisily and she grimaced.

We were both too hungry to linger in bed. Quickly showering and throwing on clothes, we made our way to the mess hall, where Lorna and her kitchen crew were cheerfully feeding the last of the diners. Visas and Jarxel were seated at the high table, chatting quietly. Ladria was talking to Elder Evana, Atton beside her, Disciple on his other side. Megari was seated near them, but not speaking to anyone, a half eaten plate of food in front of her. Danni was playing with some kitchen utensils in a corner. Her mother was watching carefully. She was clearly uneasy being among Mandoa. Bao Dur emerged from somewhere, and she looked calmer when she saw the big Zabrek.

Jennet and I took our seats at the high table and ate our breakfast, joining Visas and Jarxel. After taking the edge off my hunger, I turned to my second.

"If we're going to bring all the Mandoa survivors to Dxun, there's a lot that needs to be done," I said without preamble.

Jarxel nodded. "Agreed. We'll need sleeping quarters, for one. More 'freshers, and the mess hall will have to be enlarged considerably. We'll also need to build a few airstrips, docking areas, more hangers and repair shops."

"How many will come, do you think?" Jennet asked curiously.

"Well, we know of close to 6,000," I said consideringly, "including the colony the Elders were in. No group is more than 800 or so. I've been in contact personally with the leader of each. The plan has been for everyone to stay where they were until we could find a place for all of us to gather and rebuild. Well, we've found a place; now it's down to logistics. When it's time, all of them will come."

Jennet whistled through her teeth. "That's sixty times what is currently living on Dxun. It's not going to be easy."

"Exactly," Jarxel said.

Visas said quietly, "It would seem easiest to bring a group at a time, use that manpower to prepare for the next, and so on."

Jarxel nodded approvingly. "That's what I've thought. We can't sustain six thousand as we are, even if we could get them all here. The problem is, even doing it in stages, we don't have the ships to get a large group to Dxun at once. None of the colonies have more than a few ships, and we don't have any but the shuttle. Some individuals here have personal ships, but none bigger than the Ebon Hawk. Even packing theirs and ours to capacity, it could take weeks to get just one group here."

Ladria, Elder Evana, Atton and Disciple had joined us and were looking interested.

"If you had the supplies, and transport, how long would it take to build enough housing and amenities to sustain the survivors?" Ladria asked.

I looked at her, calculating in my head. "A few weeks if we're talking barracks, bathhouses, kitchens, and workstations. Six months to a year for more permanent housing."

Bao Dur had joined the table. "With a team of good engineers, and the right equipment, we could cut that considerably," he said thoughtfully.

"True," I answered. "But our biggest problem is financing it. I have a several accounts, and by most standards, I would be considered moderately wealthy. Working for the Exchange paid exceptionally well, and I don't spend much. But even my credits can't cover the cost. The colonies can contribute, according to the leaders. We've run the numbers, and we're still very short of enough credits to purchase enough supplies to build. Even with the raw materials the colonies will be bringing."

"Perhaps the Republic could help," Ladria said thoughtfully. "If you promised a few thousand seasoned and well trained soldiers in the fight against the Sith, in exchange they could provide transport and building supplies."

"That could work," I said slowly. "But who in the galaxy would listen to that sort of deal?"

Ladria looked at me, amused. "You're a Hero of the Republic. And you know several others personally. Can't you think of anyone you could start negotiations with?"

Light dawned. "Carth Onasi," I said. "Bastila Shan, too, if she's still alive."

"Last I heard, she was," Ladria said quietly. "Where she is, I have no idea, but I bet Admiral Onasi might know."

"The Jedi may be severely depleted," Jennet observed. "but the Republic relies on them. If Bastila vouches for you, and Ladria, _and_ Carth Onasi, the Chancellor would listen. The Republic needs all the help it can get."

"There wouldn't be any problems promising the troops," Jarxel said positively. "Most of us would jump at the chance to fight again. The only real problem would be convincing enough to stay behind to actually have enough manpower to build."

"If this is to work," I said carefully, "I would need to lead the Mandoa personally in battle."

"True," Jarxel mused. "It would be necessary on many levels. It would be the best assurance to our soldiers that this is what is best for us as a whole, and it would reassure the Republic of our intentions."

"So we fight for a while, come home, and finish rebuilding. Necessary evil." Jennet said.

"Not we, Wildcat. Me." I said.

Her eyes narrowed. "Like hell you'd go without me."

"I need you here," I said firmly. "There's nothing I'd like better than to have you with me, but someone needs to supervise the rebuild while I'm gone. Once we're proved Mates and married, you would be Regent in my place."

"Could someone else be appointed?" Jennet asked, very carefully. I could see her temper rising, and sent her a thought that it had nothing to do trying to keep her safe. She relaxed a little, but was still unconvinced.

"Possibly. But it would be better if either the Mandalore or my Mate was in charge."

"I'm an asset in battle, and if the combined battle ecstasy works with our link, that could be invaluable. Does it center on the Mandalore?" Jennet asked.

"It usually centers on the best fighter present," I said slowly. "Often that's the Mandalore, yes."

"So my presence could be a definite contribution."

"Yes," I said. "But we don't know that for sure."

"Well, one of our tests is to prove that. I know very little of building things, but I know a hell of a lot about fighting. I should be where I'm most useful," Jennet said, not quite smugly.

"You may have a point," I said gruffly. "Why don't we see what the test says, and we can discuss the logistics then?"

She gave me a swift suspicious look, but agreed.

"I could start drawing up blueprints," Bao Dur offered. "If you let me know what sort structures you need, that is. That would give us the baseline for materials needed, as well. Do you have records of what the other colonies could provide?"

"Yeah, they're all in the databanks. You could link to the Ebon Hawk too, if you wanted," I said, pleased he was offering to help. I've seen the man build things out of seemingly thin air and could think of no one better to head up the project. "Would you consider staying with us, at least long enough for the actual building to start? We're a handy people, but short on the engineering genius department."

"It would be my pleasure," Bao Dur said sincerely. "I expect the Jedi will want help with rebuilding the conclave at Dantooine as well, if they choose to keep their headquarters there. But I could easily juggle both projects; with that one, it's mostly clean up and rebuild. Yours would be a real challenge; I'd love to be a part of it."

We spent the day discussing plans, with various parts of the population wandering in and out, offering opinions. We decided that the best plan was to build six to eight apartment-style complexes. There would be at least four that could house two to four people – they would be comfortable enough, and individuals that didn't mind a roommate over a barracks situation could live there, or childless couples. One or two to house families; another for those in higher positions that lived alone. The barracks could remain, both as bed space for soldiers and guest quarters; several rooms could be walled off in that building, and still leave room for on-duty personnel.

We'd need a space port, and several more hangers, at least one more machine shop, and an infirmary. Bao Dur was positively excited with the prospect of designing and building what was needed. When we'd exhausted our creativity for the day, I took him aside.

"I have something I'd like you to see," I said seriously.

"Sure," the big Iridonian said instantly. "Where?"

"It's downloaded on the computer, come on." Jennet had wandered away to work out and after, meditate. I was glad; this was a surprise.

Bao Dur and I went to my quarters and I downloaded the plans I'd discussed with the builder on Onderon, just before I got snatched.

"They're a good start, I think," I said as the Zabrek studied the blueprints I'd had drawn up. "But I want a little more personalization; this was a basic floor plan. I want to add a gym, a landing strip, and a receiving hall."

"You're right, it is a good start. The landing strip takes space, but it's easy enough to build. You could have a private hanger behind the house. I'd say a good-sized gym could be incorporated easily enough here," he pointed to a spot on the plans, "And if you simply reduce the size the front door, and add a room the length of the front, you could have a great combination receiving and feast hall, separated from the family quarters with soundproofed walls and holo windows so it seems less cavelike. It would add about a third again the floor space, but that front hall wouldn't be part of the regular living space."

"I like it," I said. "Don't tell Jennet, this is her wedding present. How soon do you think we could build? This is my private project, paid by me, and I have the means to start right away, if we can."

"We could do that, sure. You'd have to clear out a few acres first, of course. That would require some heavier equipment than you have here, but something could be arranged on Onderon, I'd bet. I'd say you'd be living in it in a few months. Have you picked out a site yet?"

"I checked with the architect on Onderon to see if land movers can be rented; he said they could, pretty reasonably. And yeah, I picked a place. Want to see it?" I couldn't help but have a note of pride in my voice; I'd seen this spot ages ago and thought it would be a great place to build. Of course, I hadn't met Jennet then. I was sure she'd love it, but wanted Bao Dur to make sure it was suitable for what I had in mind.

"Absolutely," the Iridonian agreed.

"Well, gear up, it's a short distance from the camp, but you never know what will wander by. No point getting our legs chewed off."

He chuckled, and agreed to meet me at the gates. Kelborn and Xarga came along. I was getting used to having an escort, not that I liked it any better than when Jarxel started it. That he was right about protocol was beside the point.

I led the three of them through the jungle, after telling Jennet I was off to scout for a building site. It was true, after all, and I carefully kept the particulars buried so I didn't have to block her. She was one sharp lady and that would alert her something was up. Reaching the spot I had marked in my mind months ago, I halted our little party and swept an arm at the scenery.

"What do you think?" I asked.

Bao Dur whistled in appreciation. There was a small lake, bordered with outcroppings of rock. A large flat area was to the East; there were trees and thick vegetation everywhere but I had walked those few acres myself and knew it wouldn't need much leveling. The spot was enclosed on three sides by high hills of stone interspersed with plant life, and across the lake was a natural waterfall, sending up a churning spray and making rainbow glints in the sun. It was scenic, accessible, and defensible.

"This will work," Bao Dur said. "And Jennet will love it."

"I know," I said smugly.


	42. Chapter 42

**Jennet**

Canderous and I had talked to the Elders, and they agreed that we would resume the Trials in a week. The last stage involved combat, and Bao Dur needed a little time to get the energy dampeners ready, for one. Mostly, though, it had just been a hell of a week, and we needed some time to assimilate.

As Elder Evana had said privately, no one really questioned we were Mates anymore. The Trials were continuing because of tradition, and because I was an outlander; they wanted all the information they could get. I understood the importance of documentation for future generations; having so very little from my own life and family I certainly wasn't going to balk at helping others keep records. Trials were also a way for everyone to get used to me, and see what I can contribute as the Mate of the Mandalore. I didn't mind being a bit of a sideshow if it meant it made things easier for Canderous.

Another thing I had privately discussed with the Elders was the traditions of the wedding ceremony. I was pretty sure I understood the ritual itself, I just wanted to know what was appropriate as far as gifts, or dowry. Dowries were still common, and I had no idea if Mandalorians subscribed to them, or if a formal negotiated contract was necessary. I had no family at all to represent me, if that was the case. Luckily, none of it was required in our situation. They did have formal contracts and dowries, but only for a first arranged marriage; in the case of a widow or widower remarrying, contracts were only necessary if the other party was marrying for the first time. I was, but I was an outlander, and had not been found by search and negotiation; therefore, the only thing tradition states is exchanging wedding gifts.

"Well, I'm glad there's less fuss than I'd feared, but what is considered an appropriate wedding gift?" I asked curiously. "He's got weapons, armor…hey, I know, I could get him a new helm; that one he wears is awfully battered."

Elders Drane and Gregor gave me horrified looks and started lecturing me on the importance of the Helm of the Mandalore. Elder Evana just laughed until she cried.

"Lighten up, you two," she informed the male Elders. "Can't you see she was just trying to provoke you?"

"That," growled Elder Gregor, always the most pompous of the three, "was in very poor taste, and not funny at all."

I smiled sunnily at him. "I apologize. But you should take Elder Evana's advice. That shade of purple can't be healthy."

At that, Elder Drane started to chuckle too, and Elder Gregor reluctantly smiled. "Irreverent, irritating child," he rumbled at me, but without malice.

"Did you hear that?" I asked the other two Elders. "He loves me!"

I popped up out of my chair and kissed Elder Gregor on the cheek. His face turned several more interesting shades, and I was afraid I'd pushed things too far. I reached for my healing, just in case. Only a moment went by before he visibly relaxed and merely glowered at me. But I could see the corners of his mouth twitching, and his eyes gleamed with humor. I smiled back, and resumed the conversation.

"Seriously, what is usual for the bride to give the groom?" I asked.

"The gifts exchanged are usually practical, and something that symbolizes the partnership of the couple. Household goods, weapons, armor, transportation, things like that." Elder Evana leaned forward, elbows on the tabletop, looking earnest. "If a dowry is required, she would usually provide the basics of running a home, he the home itself, or often the other way around, especially if she's a fighter too. I'd advise you to think about what the two of you need most, and if you can afford it, get that."

"I have an idea," I said slowly. "But I'm not the best at this sort of thing. But Bao Dur or Atton, or both, would help me."

I explained, and all the Elders agreed it was perfect. I thanked them for their input and guidance, and went off to find my friends.

Predictably, I found Bao Dur at the workbench, building energy dampeners. I noticed little Danni nearby, playing quietly in a corner. Someone had made her a doll out of cloth with yellow yarn for hair. The yarn had somehow been coaxed into spirals, and I touched my own curls by reflex. I smiled at Danni, and she gave me a look back, not quite a smile, but the corners of her mouth definitely twitched upwards. She hadn't spoken a word since Canderous and Bao Dur found her and Megari in the cargo hold. Her mother had a beautiful voice, now that the Iridonian had repaired her vocal cords, but she used it sparingly. I understood; it had only been two days since she came to this camp, and while as far as I could see she was being treated very well, it would take time for her to trust we meant her no harm. I was surprised she wasn't here, for that matter. I looked around, just in case I'd missed her; the woman could come and go quieter than a cat.

"She's taking a bath," Bao Dur said quietly, seeing me looking around. "I said I'd watch Danni for her."

"How is she doing?" I asked curiously. "I haven't had much opportunity to talk to her myself, and she's very reserved. I understand, of course," I added hastily.

"Well," Bao Dur said consideringly, "well enough, I think. She's been through hell, that's certain. But she's not really broken; just battered. I'm sure given some time she'll be all right. I just wish we could do more for her."

"Like you said, give it time," I said quietly. "You don't get over things all at once. I wish Danni was more…childlike, I guess. But Megari has done a magnificent job keeping her as normal as could be managed. I hope I'm as good a mother some day. Has Danni talked at all?"

"She seems to, sort of, to Megari," Bao Dur answered, a slight frown on his face. He was carefully pitching his voice low, so as not to be overheard by the child. His back was to her, so she couldn't see his face. I glanced over, and saw the little girl look up at him, her face as close to a smile as I'd seen.

"She likes you, that's for sure," I said, smiling at her. She met my eyes for a second, then looked down at her doll.

"Do you think so?" Bao Dur asked. "I've worried that she finds me…frightening. Despite Megari being raised by Zabraks, Danni's never seen one, as far as I know. Her adoptive grandparents died before she was born."

"I can't imagine anyone that doesn't deserve it being afraid of you," I said honestly. "Kids know that sort of thing. And she comes as close to smiling as she ever does only when she looks at Megari…or you. I thought she came close with me once, but I'm not sure."

"I'm glad to hear it," he said with some relief. "She's a great kid. Almost too good, if you know what I mean."

"I do," I said. "But give her a while; she'll be getting into things and…well, doing whatever three year olds do."

"What were you like at three?" Bao Dur grinned.

"I don't remember a lot of it; my parents told me I was precocious. Apparently, my Force ability kept things…interesting. Dad told me they once had to climb a huge willow tree. Apparently, I had learned early to jump high enough to grab the lower branches, and just kept going. According to my father, the chief distress I had was that I couldn't fly like the bird I was following. He caught me just as I was trying to."

"You're kidding, right?" he asked, with a swift terrified look at Danni.

"Afraid not," I said with a smile. "Don't worry; I don't think Danni is going to try that. Although…" I paused thoughtfully. "She does seem more in tune with the Force than most children."

"You felt that too?"

"Yeah, I have. But hers seems more inward than physically inclined; if I had to guess I'd say she might have Seer talent."

"Interesting. Maybe Visas could do some tests, if Megari and Danni agree. But not now," he said quietly. "Once she's used to us, maybe."

"I agree," I said easily. "And it might not come to anything; there's lots of people Force sensitive that don't need or take well to Jedi training. They're powerful enough, but don't experience many of the side effects of an unrecognized Force sensitive."

"Like me?" Bao Dur inquired, interested.

"I suppose," I said slowly. "I didn't think of it like that, though. And you did become Jedi, eventually. As did Mira."

"What about Atton?"

"Well, he did get training early," I pointed out. "Even if he did turn to the Dark Side for a time. I think he's one of those wild talents that needed the training, then got it twisted for a while. He probably would have been a much bigger danger if he hadn't had the early intervention."

"The more I learn about the Force," Bao Dur said seriously, "the more I realize how little I really _do_ know."

"And that's the first step to wisdom, Padawan," I quipped, grinning. "Or so I'm told."

He cuffed me lightly, and changed the subject.

"So what did you need, my tiny friend?" he asked teasingly.

I mock-glowered at him. I was the smallest adult in camp; he was the largest. Walking next to him, I didn't even reach his armpit, and felt about Danni's age. Even she looked as though she might get to be nearly as tall as Mira or Visas; already at three she was waist high to the Iridonian. Her father must have been a tall man, Megari herself was only middle height, which still made her considerably taller than myself. Bao Dur and I shared a friendly verbal sparring about weather differences and keeping up with the grown-ups.

"I want to get a ship for Canderous for a wedding gift," I said. "I'm an okay pilot, and know enough about mechanics to not get cheated when my ship needed work, but buying a good one is a pain. I'd appreciate input from you and Atton."

"Of course," he said promptly. "When would you like to go look?"

"Well, we have a week until Trials resume. I thought an overnight shopping trip might work. Canderous would want to go, of course, but he'd agree to split off if I gave him a good enough reason," I said. "Maybe in the next day or two? When will the energy dampeners be ready?"

"Oh, they won't take long; give me another two days and they'll be ready and tested."

"All right, does three days from now sound okay?"

"Perfect." He looked at me consideringly. "This is an expensive prospect, you know. Are you looking to buy new or used?"

"Probably good condition used. I can afford new, but why pay that unless you have to? A good ship will last a lifetime, so I hear. Besides," I said with a flattering smile, "I'm lucky – I'm friends with the best mechanic _and _the best pilot in the galaxy. How could I go wrong?"

He snorted good-naturedly. "Flattery will get you nowhere." But I saw the gleam of pride in his eye.

"But Lorna's spice cake will get me at least a diagnosis," I wheedled. "I saw you eat a whole one all by yourself at dinner yesterday."

"All right," he laughed, throwing up his hands in surrender. "Throw in a keg of Mandalorian ale and you've got yourself a mechanic."

"Deal," I grinned.


	43. Chapter 43

Megari came in then, her long brown hair damp and bound back in a braid. I was wildly envious; the tail nearly reached her waist. I briefly wondered how long it would take to grow my hair that long, and decided on the spot to at least let it get down to my shoulders. Between the hair, clear skin, beautiful bone structure and those gorgeous eyes, Megari was a breathtakingly lovely woman, even with her customary sober expression. I smiled at her, and she briefly smiled back. It transformed her from merely lovely to outright beautiful for a nanosecond. I heard Bao Dur's breathing change, just for a moment.

"Hello there," I said, my most friendly expression on my face. "How are you settling in? Everyone treating you all right?"

"Yes, thank you," she said quietly. Her voice was a rich contralto, almost as compelling as Ladria's but lacking the steel behind it. Ladria couldn't help her tone; she had been a leader so long she rarely spoke without that authority behind her words. Megari had learned the hard way _not_ to show her backbone; it could have gotten her, or worse yet Danni, killed. But even so, I could feel the strength in her, and admired it.

"I'm glad you chose to stay with us," I said sincerely. "I'm sorry I've been a rotten hostess and not spent more time with you and Danni. I hope you're enjoying yourself?"

"I am, rather," she answered, almost as if she were surprised. "And you've been an excellent hostess. Danni and I are being taken care of very well. I thank you."

"I noticed some clothing was found for the two of you. We don't have much by way of female amenities here, I'm afraid. But we're going to go up to Onderon to purchase some supplies and personal shopping in a few days. We'll stay the night, make a couple days of it. I hope you and Danni will join us, or if not, allow me to purchase what you need, if you'll give me a list?"

"I'd be glad to come along, it would be lovely to have more than two sets of clothing, and get Danni some things as well. Not that everyone hasn't been generous," she said hastily, wincing as if I might scold her.

"I know just how you feel," I said with a smile. "Two weeks ago, all I had was the clothes I was wearing, the credits in my pouch and no way to apply one to increase the other. I didn't even have a weapon. Everything I owned had been blown up when a couple of bounty hunters tried to kill me by tossing grenades into my apartment. I met Canderous that night in a cantina – remind me to tell you about that some time when Danni is napping – and he took me to the Ebon Hawk. If it hadn't been for Ladria and Mira being generous enough to shop for me, I'd be in rags right now. As it is, I still only have, let's see, maybe six changes of clothes, not including workout gear."

Megari smiled, a genuine one that lasted longer than a microsecond. "It sounds like you've had quite an adventurous life. I'd love to hear about it sometime."

"Oh, don't get me started; anyone around here will tell you I'm a chatterbox. You might regret asking me to talk," I grinned at her.

"I don't mind. It's better than having someone rant at you, pretending manners while they think of some new psychological terror to use on you. Falken Rikes was a genius for scaring one with a word," her tone was matter-of-fact; no pity or self-loathing or fear; just plain acknowledgement of what her life had been.

"How can you be so calm about it?" I asked wonderingly.

I was scanning her psyche and finding none of the shattered pieces that usually would be there after the year she'd lived through. There was no sign of insanity either, which might account for the calm. Her aura, when I checked, was brightly blue-white, with some bitter yellow mixed in that indicated outside trauma, and the usual amount of red. I saw one black slash that almost pulsed; she had killed, and it ate at her. Who, I had no idea, but I was willing to bet it was in self-defense. She was firmly on the side of Light, and had a reasonable sensitivity to the Force, though not enough to be Jedi. Danni, when I looked, did. Her aura, like most children, was brilliantly white, almost no red at all, but it was lightly streaked with the yellow she shared with her mother. Her Force sensitivity almost glowed, and I resolved to speak to Megari about it soon.

She looked at me now, her expression calm. "I made up my mind when we were taken that no one was going to take away who I was, or Danni was. For her sake, I kept faith that we would escape somehow, and that no matter what they tried, when we got out of there, it would be as whole as when I got there. To keep them from harming my child, I was obedient, and everything they wished. They never understood that they never really touched _me_."

"Not even Rikes?" I wasn't doubting her perception, or trying to bring up bad memories. But Rikes had struck me as extremely intelligent, not as easy to fool as you might think under the arrogance. He'd had a full year to observe Megari and her daughter. On the other hand, if he had regarded her as nothing more than booty he may not have looked much closer.

"Rikes was intelligent, but arrogant with it," Megari echoed my thoughts. "He enjoyed toying with people, and frightening them. I simply made sure I wasn't much of a challenge. He thought I was simple-minded and biddable, so scaring me wasn't much sport. He left me largely alone," she said quietly.

"That was very brave, and smart of you," I said softly. "I couldn't have done it."

"You could, if you had your child to think of," she answered, shrugging. "And you're a trained fighter. I am not," she added.

"I'm good, but eighty against one... I couldn't have fought my way out, especially if I was protecting my daughter." I smiled, a little coldly. "I'm glad Rikes is dead. I just wish you could have been rescued sooner," I added regretfully.

"Things happen for a reason," Megari said with a fatalistic shrug. "I am grateful we were found at all."

"You're an amazing woman," I said sincerely, and I saw Bao Dur nodding at my words.

"No," she said simply, shaking her head, blushing faintly. "I am a mother, that's all."

Danni had abandoned her corner and reached up for her mother, who picked her up and rested her face on her child's soft flyaway brown curls. She made little fffft sounds in the little one's ear, and Danni giggled. I smiled at the sound.

Three days later, a rather large group headed to Onderon for the shopping trip. Bao Dur volunteered to stay behind and look after Danni, and help set up the enlarged battle circle with the energy dampeners. Megari, somewhat to my surprise, seemed serene about leaving her daughter behind. Not that anyone who knew Bao Dur for ten minutes wouldn't trust him with their life, entire fortune and virgin nubile daughter, but I thought it was amazing she was willing to leave Danni in a Mandalorian camp. Tentatively, I asked her about it, and she merely smiled.

"I have been among you almost a week, and have been treated with the utmost kindness and respect. No one would dare cross the Mandalore, or you. And I've seen even the meanest looking warriors there treat Danni with affection. She's become quite a favorite. Besides, if anyone even looked at Danni wrongly, Bao Dur would rip their arms off and beat them to death with them," she said with a mischievous grin.

"You've got that right," I said, chuckling. I marveled at the change in Megari over the last five days. She had gone from a quiet, rather grave person to someone with a lively intelligence and sense of humor. She was still on the quiet side, but much less so. Her manners were as perfect as Visas' or Disciple's, but under that she seemed to be regaining her sense of whimsy. I was glad to see it.

The rest of the party consisted of Canderous, Ladria, Atton, Mira, Dax, Kex, Xarga, Kelborn, Visas, Zuka, and Tagren. We had decided to bring the honor guard so that both Canderous and I would be escorted at all times. I had insisted, wanting to take no chances. Jarxel stayed on Dxun as second in command. I had conferred with Bao Dur before leaving and he had assured me that short of a completely blown engine, he could repair any ship I found. Even in that case, he could still fix it, he just wouldn't recommend me buying it in the first place. In the mean time, Atton could help me just as easily, and Bao Dur felt that getting the battle circle up and ready was a higher priority. I agreed. Atton promised that he'd run any repairs that might be needed by Bao Dur before we committed to buy.

We were a happy little group, chatting away on the short trip to the main planet. We docked, paid our fees and collected the visas, and headed toward the shopping district. As I emerged from the docks, I heard my name being called and turned to see who had spoken, a quizzical smile on my face, expecting Atton or Dax to address me. I caught a blur of brown robes out of the corner of my eye and suddenly several things happened at once.

I was picked up and whirled around, engulfed in a warm and familiar embrace, a voice babbling in my ear.

"Thank the Gods you're alive! Jennet, I was certain you were dead, I've been looking everywhere for you…"

The presence was ripped away from me, and I was suddenly on my feet, dazed and blinking, Canderous in front of me, his blaster out, his other hand having just shoved me behind him. I looked around his wide shoulders and saw Kex and Kelborn restraining a handsome man of middle height and age, bearded, fair hair slightly mussed, in the robes of a Jedi Master. He looked startled, and was starting to be angry. Dax was behind me, blaster also pointed at the Jedi, the other hand protectively on my shoulder, and the other guard members all had the drop on him. I blinked again.

"Wait!" I shouted, and everyone froze. "Let him go," I said to Kex and Kelborn, and they looked at Canderous briefly, who was glancing over his shoulder at me quizzically. I sent a brief thought and his face tightened, but he nodded at his men, and they released the Jedi.

"Hello Stefan," I said brightly. "Sorry about that."


	44. Chapter 44

At first glace, Stefan Tai'rhi looked exactly the same as the last time I saw him. He stood somewhere between Mira and Megari in height, but was so well proportioned he seemed taller until you had some way to compare. His bright golden hair was still on the short side, though not as short as any of the Mandalorians, and his moustache and beard, a couple shades darker in color than his hair, were neatly trimmed, encircling only his mouth with his cheeks clean shaven. But on closer inspection, the smile lines around his eyes were cut deeper than I remembered, and there were more hints of silver among the gold at his temples. One pure white streak was on the left side of his chin, making an interesting contrast in his beard. Most telling, his blue eyes, the color of a perfect summer sky, had a troubled and wary look, as if they had seen too much.

Then he smiled, and all the little changes disappeared for a moment. The dimple in his right cheek flashed and his eyes went from watchful to warm. He held out his hands to me. I came forward and took them, smiling back, glad he was alive. He kissed both cheeks, and more familiarly, my forehead, then set me back to look me over.

"Jennet, darling…I'm relieved you're looking so well. I've been on the move for the last year when the Jedi murders started…" he glanced around, noting the four Jedi accompanying me and stopped, confused. "I assume you know about that?" At my nod, he looked again at my companions, then wider to include Megari, Canderous and the honor guard.

Everyone was silent, glancing between me, Stefan, and Canderous. The Mandalorians looked suspicious and wary, the rest of my friends puzzled and full of questions.

Canderous was utterly blank.

Stefan smiled at the assembled company in general, dropped my hands and took a decorous step back.

"But how rude of me," he said easily. "I was so pleased to see you I barged in on your friends. Stefan Tai'rhi," he bowed to everyone, and canny as always, offered his hand to Canderous. The swift look to me said he had not missed the protective stance of the Mandalorians, and Canderous in particular.

I had been trying to talk to Canderous mentally since I told the honor guard to back off, but he was blocking me entirely. The very blankness of his face told me how thrown he was by Stefan's sudden appearance. He stared at the offered hand for a long moment, and I was absolutely certain he was going to refuse to shake it. But just short of utterly rude, he clasped it briefly, wrist to wrist, blue stare hard but not yet hostile.

"Canderous Ordo," he rumbled, not quite growling. "I am the Mandalore, and these are my men." He gave their names. Each man nodded shortly, still wary but all weapons were now holstered.

I introduced the rest of the party, and Ladria smoothly came forward to ask Stefan what he knew about surviving Jedi. Stefan gave her a considering look.

"I know who you are, of course, Ladria Windbreak," he said slowly. "The Exile. I was not one of the council, but I was part of the preliminary discussions. If it makes a difference, I lobbied to commute the sentence from exile to in-house restriction." His eyes were sober.

"Not incarceration?" Ladria asked with a gentle smile.

"No," he answered seriously. "You didn't really go over to the Dark Side, you know. You were just lost for a time. Perhaps, in the end, the council unwittingly made the right choice?"

"Perhaps they did," Ladria said thoughtfully. "I didn't, always. I'm still not sure of just how responsible I am for the rip in the Force, or its mending. But whatever the cause, whoever is to blame, it's done. Everyone has paid a price."

"The Jedi in particular," Stefan agreed. "We can only move forward now."

"Agreed." Ladria looked at him gravely. "There is some business left here, but afterwards I am going to go to Dantooine and see about rebuilding the conclave, and finding any survivors. The Sith are still a threat; I consider that Jedi responsibility."

"Absolutely."

I had been listening to this exchange with half an ear. The rest of me was trying desperately to contact Canderous. He was resolutely blocking me, his face still giving nothing away. I touched his arm, wordlessly trying to get him to talk to me. He looked down at me, gave a small tight smile and relaxed infinitesimally. I smiled back. Then his face tightened again when Stefan spoke.

"Jennet, may I have a private word?"

I turned and tried to glare but it failed woefully. I sighed, and nodded.

"Of course."

We moved away from the group, Kex, Dax and Kelborn staying near but out of earshot. Stefan eyed the three large bodyguards, a speculative look on his face.

"Do you want to explain the escort?" he asked gently, quirking an eyebrow at me.

"Not especially," I said honestly.

He stood at ease, a trick I knew he used when a situation was unknown. I smiled sadly. I was relieved and pleased he was alive, and remembered all the reasons I had fallen in love with him. He was still charming, sophisticated, intelligent, and genuinely caring about the people around him. He also could be ruthless and cold if need be, but then so could I. He was complex, kind, powerful, not at all pompous as so many higher up Jedi become, and only occasionally arrogant. I had good reasons to love him.

I knew I'd always remember our time with fondness. I was glad for the memories. What gave me the most happiness now, though, was knowing that this extraordinary man had always believed in me, and always will. He and my parents gave me the best gift of all: a happy childhood.

He was Uncle Stefan again. And my stubborn, irritating Mate wouldn't let me in so I could show him that. Men.

"Why were you trying to find me?" I asked abruptly.

He looked a little startled at the question. "When the Jedi murders had escalated to the point the Council fled, I went into hiding, as did most surviving members of the Order. We all kept on the move, trying to keep in touch secretly. It didn't work very well," he said with a depreciative grimace. "I was on Onderon shortly after this happened. I know you well enough to realize you would have already left. It took some time, but eventually I traced you to Nar Shadaa. The trail went cold from there. Your ship crashed, and I knew you'd survived that, but that planet was in chaos two weeks ago. The Exchange decimated, the Hutt dead. I learned that you had been on both the Exchange and the Hutt's hit list for at least a month. All evidence indicated you were dead. But I didn't really believe it."

"So you came back to Onderon?" I asked, trying to follow his thought process.

"I figured it was the one place you'd come back to eventually. I knew you had a lockbox still, and the last traces of Miranne and Drake were here. I was hoping to leave you a message at the bank. I do have the other key you know, and access to the box."

"I'd forgotten about that," I said with a small smile. "All right, I know how. But you didn't say why."

"From the look on Canderous's face, I'd say it doesn't matter why, now," Stefan said gently. "You're alive, and someone loves you. Better than I could, I think." At my startled look, he said quietly, "I am Jedi. I checked auras. His and yours…well, it's nothing like I've ever seen before. I can't give you that. I think maybe I always knew it, or I would never have let the Council bully me into leaving you."

"I hated you for a while," I said, smiling. "I got over it, though."

"I was never good enough for you," he said seriously. "I never made you my first priority, and I allowed you to make me yours. I told myself when I left it was to protect you, and largely it was. But I think I knew even then we were building a dream on a cloud with no real foundation."

"It was a nice dream," I said sadly.

"You have a better one now," he pointed out. "You were wiser than I, and fought it. I was the ruthless bastard that broke down your wall."

"If you hadn't, I wouldn't have been ready when I met Canderous," I said, and grinned. "So thank you for being such a jerk."

"You're welcome, my lady," he grinned back, a little sadly. "But tell me…are you happy?"

"Oh yes," I said, and my smile widened.

"Then I'm glad. But really, Jennet…a Mandalorian?" He looked more bemused than disapproving.

"He'd kill you slow if you ever let on I'd told you, but he's a softie, really," I said laughed. "At least when it comes to me."

"Well, it's all right then," he touched my cheek. "When is the wedding?"

"About a month, I think," I answered. I wasn't surprised he'd deduced that much; Stefan had always been good at reading people. "As soon as the Mate trials are over."

"Mate?" He looked startled at that. "Well, it explains a great deal. I'd heard of Mandalorian Mates, but thought perhaps it was a myth."

"You had?" It was my turn to be startled.

"I didn't join Revan and Ladria during the wars, but the Order learned as much about the Mandoa as they could at the time. It was a footnote in one of the histories we'd uncovered. But it's interesting that it seems to be true."

"Oh, it's true," I said, a little more forcibly than I had meant to. "We share thoughts, and fighting ability…it's amazing, really."

"I'd love to talk to you about it sometime. But now, if we don't rejoin your party, I suspect your Mate will tear me to pieces. Has he listened in?" he asked curiously.

"No. He's been blocking me since I told him who you were."

"Ah. Well, let's go put his mind at rest, shall we?" He offered me his arm, and I took it.

We walked back to the group, who were chatting quietly. Canderous stood, arms crossed, utterly still. I disengaged from Stefan and went over to him, standing on tiptoe to kiss his shoulder. He wouldn't unbend enough for me to reach his cheek. I understood, but wanted to kick him anyway for his stubbornness.

"Mandalore," Stefan said formally, "You are fortunate in your Mate. And she, I see, is fortunate in hers. I understand congratulations are in order?"

_Are you sure, Wildcat?_ Came his thought, and I resisted the urge to elbow him sharply.

_Yes, you big jerk, _I thought back, with an inward smile. I let him feel that there was no deception, no regret. I felt him relax, and offered a hand to Stefan.

"Yes, thank you, Master Stefan," he answered, just as formally. "Will you join us when we set a date?"

I was surprised at this, and sent him a suspicious look. He smiled.

_Don't think too much of me, Wildcat. I'm honest enough to admit I don't mind rubbing his face in it some._

I schooled my face so the laughter wouldn't show.

"If I can, I will, gladly," Stefan said with a brilliant smile. "You can reach me by my personal datalink."

He gave the information to Canderous, Ladria, and the rest of the Jedi present, promising to keep in touch. An invitation was extended by all to join us in the shopping trip, but Stefan refused charmingly, saying he had business elsewhere. I barely managed to contain a sigh of relief. I was relieved Stefan had escaped the Sith Jedi hunt, and he would always be family. But right now, I was simply glad to have had some closure.

"I will try to find the rest of the surviving Order," he promised Ladria. "When you're ready, we'll meet at Dantooine. And Jennet…do think about training," he turned to me. "I know that as the Mate of the Mandalore you will have much to do, but I can see your progress has likely exceeded even my estimation of your talents."

"I'll think about it. I have been thinking about it, in fact, for a while. I still don't know how I feel about it. And we have a lot to do; we're trying to gather the Mandoa survivors," I had finally gotten Canderous to unbend enough to allow me to slip my arm through his. He placed his free hand over mine and smiled down at me, then looked at Stefan.

"I've left it up to her about Jedi training," he rumbled. "She's needed with the Mandoa, yes, but the Sith are a threat to us all. I know her strength and talent, I've not only seen it, I've lived it, through her."

Stefan nodded, and we wound up the departing pleasantries. All the proper things said, Stefan bowed again at everyone, and left. I turned to Canderous.

"You okay?"

"Yeah," he said, leaning down to kiss my cheek.

_He's a lot more forgiving than me; I would have beat the shit out of him, or, more likely, challenged him for you. He just stands aside and is glad you're happy._

_He's a good man,_ I answered. _But more than that, he knows a hopeless battle when he sees one. He saw our auras and knew that he stood no chance anymore._

_It's just…he didn't fight for you. This time, or against the Council. I'm not sure if that makes him better, or just an idiot. _I _wouldn't have let you go without a fight. _ There was a pause._ I vote idiot._

I gave an inward laugh. _Maybe. I'm just glad he's alive for you to fret about._

_I'm _not _fretting._

_Sure, _I thought skeptically.

_I don't fret. _You _fret. I brood. And snarl._

_Of course._

_And glower, _he said, demonstrating.

I laughed, and kissed him, and he grinned back.


	45. Chapter 45

Author's note: Again, sorry for the slower updates. I needed a little time to let the story perk a while in my head, and I have less time to write than I'd like. Hope everyone's still enjoying the story, and please feel free to

**Canderous**

Meeting Stefan had thrown me. I would rather spend a few hours in Falken Rikes' charming torture room than admit out loud that my hostility toward him wasn't so much righteous indignation for hurting Jennet as it was fear I'd lose her. He was everything I wasn't – handsome, sophisticated, educated, charming. I hated him on sight. My first impulse was to go ahead and shoot him out of hand, for hurting Jennet, and for just breathing. He represented a whole world that I couldn't give her. If she chose to become Jedi, I couldn't follow.

I had blocked her out of instinct, to protect myself, and because I didn't want her to choose me from pity or obligation. When I finally let her back in, I knew that I had won fairly, even if I itched to challenge him and prove it on the field of battle. Not having that option rankled. I doubted I would like Stefan Tai'rhi much under any circumstances, but for Jennet's sake I wouldn't be hostile. I did privately hope he wouldn't be visiting often.

I refused to anaylze my reaction furthur or admit it was jealousy. I also shoved aside any sneaking suspicion that everyone else had known it as well.

_She chose _me _you bastard,_ I thought with satisfaction, and banished the Jedi from my mind.

After Stefan left, we headed to a hotel near the palace where had commed ahead for reservations. Taking care of checking in and dropping off luggage, we split the shopping party into two groups. I took most of the honor guard with me, leaving Kex and Dax with Jennet, Megari and the Jedi. We all agreed to meet back at the hotel early evening.

It was still only mid-morning, and the weather was hot. I don't like being without armor much, but I was glad to not have its weight on me. As always, I had an energy shield strapped to my wrist, as did everyone. We were all armed, of course, but that was nothing unusual. Kelborn and Xarga were flanking me, Zuka slightly ahead, Tagren a few paces behind. Being surrounded, even by my kin, makes me uneasy but I had agreed with Jennet that it was best to be cautious. I was still berating myself for my carelessness before.

We visited the grocer's to check on the delivery date of the foodstuffs I'd ordered, and followed that with a building supply broker. I had a list of supplies and services needed to build our house that Bao Dur, Zuka, Jarxel, Kex and I had composed. Two hours of bargaining and a near brawl later, we came to terms. I had done my research, and wasn't going to be cheated simply because he was the most convenient merchant available. The broker was a tough son of a bitch and I admired his guts, but he eventually saw the wisdom of being fair. Suggesting I might find it an advantage to invest in a rival brokerage and set up shop on Onderon, plus a few veiled, more physical threats made him come to his senses. It wasn't a bad idea either, and I made a mental note to look into the possibility.

We made a brief stop at the jeweler's to pick up Jennet's ring, and a longer one at the electronic supply to secure shipment for household computer and appliance goods. The last stop was the financial district, where I was pleased to find many of my investments had paid off even better than I had expected. As was my habit, I reinvested half of the profit, with the other half more than adequate to pay the balance of the building project. I made arrangements for the merchants to be paid, and we headed back toward the hotel.

My errands hadn't taken all that much time, and I had four or five hours to kill before I expected Jennet and the others back. I considered catching up to them; I could track Jennet easily enough. But I hate shopping, and I knew she was looking for a wedding gift for me, and would prefer it was a surprise. She hadn't said so, but I had caught that much off her thoughts. As I was about the house, she was keeping her idea carefully buried. I was sure she wouldn't welcome me right now, and didn't want to risk spoiling her fun by checking mentally. I could ask her if it was safe to join her easily enough, but likely what she was up to would be on the surface of her thoughts, where I could pick them up. She wanted badly for whatever it was to be a surprise.

I decided that now was as good a time as any to try and contact Carth Onasi. I wanted our initial conversation to be private, anyway. I would ask Ladria, the Elders, Jarxel, and Jennet to be present for the official negotiations, along with whomever Carth or the Republic wanted there. Assuming, of course, there _were_ any negotiations.

There was little love lost between Carth and me. I respected the hell out of him, and he was a good fighter. He also had the balls to love one of the most feared, brilliant, and deadly warriors in centuries: Revan. Anyone who earned the trust and love of a former Sith Lord has my admiration. During that mission, once Carth got over his irritating soul-searching conflict over Revan, I found myself actually liking him. I was pretty sure he didn't return the compliment.

If there was any attitude that needed clearing up before official negotiations started, I wanted it between us, and no one else.

When the original Ebon Hawk crew parted company, each of us took along a personal datalink that only had the other seven members' access codes programmed in it. It had been Mission's idea, and I unaccountably had not wanted to crush her feelings by refusing mine when it was offered. I was pretty sure the others were sincere in wanting to keep in touch with each other, and equally sure they didn't want to keep in touch with me. But the irrepressible teenage Twi'lik had somehow got to me. Not enough to have actually used the datalink, but I had continued to keep it on my person, and make sure it was in good repair. I had carried it so long I had almost forgotten about it.

When I had hooked up with Ladria and her crew, I had tried to reach Revan, Jolee, Ju'hani, and Bastila, to see if they had escaped the Sith hunt. I had not gotten an answer. That didn't necessarily mean they were dead, though. I sincerely hoped all of them were alive, even Bastila, for all her arrogance and snobbery. I was certain trying to contact Revan again would be useless; if Carth didn't know where she was, no one did. Ladria had told me of her conversation with the Admiral before we'd left for Dantooine; I was sure that if she had any clue where Revan was, she would have told at least Onasi, if not me.

I took the small device out now, and punched the code for Carth Onasi. I was not surprised that I didn't make contact right away, and wondered if he even kept it with him. I tapped in the access codes to the hotel, sent a message to the front desk that I be contacted immediately on my comlink if I got a call, and headed down to the gym, the honor guard at my heels.

I was showered, dressed and was almost back to my room when my comlink buzzed. A minute later, I was staring at Admiral Onasi. He looked tired, and the few gray hairs at his temples had become broad wings over his ears, but otherwise, he hadn't changed much. He wasn't smiling, but then neither was I. Neither of us tried.

"Carth," I said with a nod by way of greeting, "I hear you made Admiral. Congratulations."

"Thanks."

He was silent for a moment, studying me as well as he could with a few light years of space between our computers.

"Canderous Ordo," he said finally. "Of the seven that have that code, you were the last I expected to ever use it. What's on your mind?"

"Business," I answered briefly. "But first, have you heard from any of the others?"

"Most of them, yes," he answered. "I took Mission with me when we disbanded, and Zalbaar went back to Kashyyk. She wanted like hell to stay with the Wookies, but politics there were dangerous, even for one that had the life debt of the Chieftain. She visits now and then, but they are adamant that no off-worlders are allowed beyond her or the other members of our party."

"She's doing well, then?" I asked.

"Yeah. She's a bright kid, finished her primary education in a year, and took university by storm. She got a degree in mathematical engineering. She's like a daughter to me. In fact, she'll be one soon. Her and Dustil are marrying next year." He smiled at that, and the years dropped away from his troubled face for a moment.

"I'm glad to hear that," I said sincerely. "And the others?"

"They're alive," he said shortly. "I can't say more than that."

I understood, and nodded. Transmissions can be intercepted, and to give away the location of three powerful Jedi would be foolish. We had purposely avoided mentioning any other names.

"Still no word…?" I let it hang, and he shook his head jerkily.

"None. I understand you travel with a mutual friend…?" he eyed me quizzically. "I spoke to her a month or so ago."

"Yeah. Nothing here, either." I saw his eyes close for a moment and added, "Sorry."

"Yeah, well, what do you do?" He said tiredly.

Having a greater understanding now of another person being your whole world, I sympathized with that look of near defeat. I found myself wishing I could give him news that took that look away. I squashed it, knowing he wouldn't accept my condolences anyway, let alone believe they were sincere.

"I have news, and a proposition to run by you," I said abruptly. "It would be better to talk on a more secure frequency about that, later. When would be a good time?"

"Hold on," he said, and cut the connection. I waited, and a few minutes later, the comm buzzed. I answered, and Carth's face was back on screen.

"This transmission can't be intercepted without some serious hacking. Not that caution isn't a good idea, but safe to say we won't be overheard," Carth said briskly. "Now, why have you really called?"

"I've spent the last five years collecting the remnants of my people, and taken the Helm of the Mandalore," I said.

Carth nodded. "I've kept tabs on everyone as best I could," he said. "I heard there was a new Mandalore. I was concerned about it until I found out it was you."

"What the hell does that mean?" I growled. I wasn't surprised he knew already, with his position and connections. But I didn't like his tone.

"Nothing. Just that even though we don't get along particularly well, I respect you. If the Mandalorians are banding under a new leader, I'd rather it be you." He quirked an eyebrow at me and smiled coolly.

"Well, thanks," I grumbled. He gave a short nod, and I continued.

"There's close to 6,000 that we've found, and we want to colonize Dxun. I offer a trade to the Republic – 2,000 trained fighters at your disposal against the Sith, in exchange for transport, building supplies and services to build our colony. And a guarantee we will not attack the Republic again."

"We already have that guarantee without helping you," he answered stiffly. "Scattered, your people aren't much of a threat."

I squashed the urge to roar at him, because he was right. Instead, I said levelly, "True. But we'll colonize eventually without your help. If you take advantage now, we both benefit, and as allies, you'll find us loyal. I won't guarantee we'll be stupidly obedient – we don't play _that_ well with others. But under my rule, you will have no trouble, plus a well armed and trained battalion in your fight against the Sith. We recognize that threat as well as you do."

He nodded slowly. "The idea has merit. I suggest we have a few meetings and hammer out a workable plan before I bring it to anyone else's attention. Are you willing to play the Hero of the Republic card?"

"I am," I said shortly.

"That would help," he said thoughtfully. "I can get away in a few weeks to discuss this further. Where can you be reached?"

"I'll have my datalink with me at all times," I answered. "And I'm transmitting my codes for my base on Dxun now."

I looked at him, and grinned. He started at that, and looked wary. "Three weeks would work fine,' I said casually. "Jennet would love to have you at our wedding."

His reaction was splendid. His eye went wide with astonishment and his mouth dropped open, his face changing from wary to incredulous. I stifled a chortle at making him lose his cool.

"Wedding?!" he sputtered. "You're getting _married_?"

"Yep," I said, unable to keep from grinning. "Her name's Jennet Jax."

"Jennet…" he mused. "That name sounds familiar. Wait…I had a report a week ago about a Hutt being killed on Nar Shadaa, and something about the Exchange…_that_ Jennet Jax? Nothing in the report said she was Mandalorian."

"She's not," I said, almost gleefully, waiting for the next reaction. "And I'm willing to bet the reports are not exaggerated."

He sat back abruptly, running a hand through his hair and trying to get his face back to an expression of cool interest. "Let me get this straight. You, the Mandalore, are marrying a non-Mandalorian woman that blew up a Hutt?"

"That's right," I said smugly. "You should have seen her, she was magnificent."

"I'm almost afraid to meet her," Carth said sardonically, and I scowled.

"Watch yourself," I growled.

"I'm sure she's very nice," Carth said diplomatically, and I suppressed the urge to laugh again. I deliberately chose not to enlighten him about Jennet's temperament. This was going to give me private entertainment for ages. I couldn't wait until he actually met Jennet.

"She is," I said sincerely, but with a look that suggested 'nice' to a Mandalorian wouldn't necessarily match _his_ definition. I almost spoiled the moment with a bark of laughter when ever so faintly he flinched.

_Enough fucking with his head_, I told myself, and sat back. "Seriously, I would consider it an honor for you to attend my wedding, Admiral Onasi," my tone was quiet and absolutely sincere.

"Make it 'Carth' and you've got a deal," the general said, clearly surprised at my change of attitude, and willing to meet me halfway.

"Thanks…Carth," I said.

I looked at him consideringly, and thought about what Jennet might do, and how she would talk to him. I knew I'd never make much of a diplomat, but if I can keep things to _my_ advantage, I could get along well enough. But in this case, I actually liked the man, and knew he didn't much like me. That was fine, I didn't really care, but it was important to my people that we get along. So I took a slow breath and eyed Carth, trying to come up with the right way to say this.

"I know we have our differences," I said with difficulty. "I just want you to know that I've always respected you. I consider you an honorable man, and a good fighter. It was a privilege to serve with you."

He gave me a long, assessing look, clearly surprised. I met his stare calmly. He sat a little straighter and gave me a small smile.

"Revan always said there was more to you than met the eye. Maybe she was right," he said slowly. "I'll admit I'm wondering what brought this on. You never seemed to consider me more than a 'Republic idealist with a Jedi 'saber up my ass' is how I think you put it?" His gaze was faintly mocking.

"Yeah, well, you made Admiral, so you likely still are," I said with a touch of a bite.

Unexpectedly, he laughed. "Now I'm sure it's really Canderous I'm talking to."

"Look, Carth, things are changing, and I'm not a fool. My people have spent fifteen years with no direction or identity. We change with the times, or we die. I choose to live, and I'll do what it takes to see my kin survive too. There's no shame in being honorable allies with the best chance for the universe to have balance. I've made no secret that I think the Republic is overly bureaucratic and often corrupt, but most of you try to do the right thing. The Sith…they're brilliant, ruthless, and ferocious, but would choose to enslave or annihilate. That's not conquering, that's genocide."

"I agree," Carth said readily. "Careful, you might show some idealistic tendencies. Not to mention you're all but saying you'll join the fight regardless if we help you or not."

"I might personally," I admitted, "But my kin will not, without me. This isn't a threat, it's plain fact. We're too scattered for me to effectively rule right now. But if the Republic helps us colonize, we can be a real help."

"That is a well thought out argument," Carth said, his diplomat hat on. "You have my attention, and for what it's worth, I believed you from the start. You're a hard-assed son of a bitch, General Ordo, but you've always been honest."

"Thanks," I said sincerely.

He laughed again. "I hate to admit it, but I've missed having you around. I usually didn't like what you had to say, but I could count that it was sincere. Revan likes you; that should tell me something."

I refrained from pointing out that Revan liked me partly because of shared darkness; it didn't seem the best time to bring it up. I settled for a diplomatic "I like her too," adding "I hope you hear from her soon."

Carth looked tired again, but gamely gave a wry smile. "Me too."

"Well," he said briskly, "I'll see you in three weeks. Give my congratulations to your bride. I'm looking forward to meeting her." He sounded professionally sincere, and I stifled a snicker.

"Will do. And Carth…thanks," I said.

"You're welcome," he said simply, and cut the connection.

I sat back, meditatively staring at the blank screen. An important step had been made toward reuniting my people, and giving them a purpose. I hoped Carth had enough clout to make this work.

All in all, it had been a strange day so far.


	46. Chapter 46

Author's note: First of all, I want to apologize for it being two weeks without an update on this story. All I can say is lately, life has just gotten in the way, and I've had better weeks. Secondly, the new story, or rather, the extention of this one, _And Fear Itself,_ was one that came to me all at once, at least Disciple, Atton, and Bao Dur's points of view; Visas was slower to speak up. It was one of those write me _NOW_ moments, and when the muse shouts, I obey. So it sort of took up some time away from Jennet and Canderous. Thirdly, curiously enough, Jennet has been quiet lately, and I couldn't get her to talk. She seems to be perking up now, so hopefully I'll be able to get in the next few chapters much quicker than the last.

I want to sincerely thank everyone who has hung in there and kept checking for updates, and sent encouragement. The reviews have meant a lot to me and knowing there are people out there enjoying what I'm writing is indescribably fantastic. I promise I WILL finish this story; it will not be one of those hanging out there for two years before I get around to the next chapter sort of stories. I have read fan fiction that is fabulously written, original ideas that are as long as mine is turning out to be (and honestly, I _never_ intended when I first posted for this to be so long! Blame Jennet; until recently the woman wouldn't shut up...) that I got emotionally invested in, was being updated regularly, I couldn't wait to read the next installment...and then the author just stopped. Two years later, they have scads of new stories, some actually finished, but not one word on the story I had loved. So...I'm saying now, _this will never be me._ If I publish an unfinished story, unless I have a death in the family, or I myself get hit by a bus, I _will_ continue to update, and I _will_ finish it. This is my promise to you, gentle readers.

I hope this chapter isn't too unbearably boring to everyone...but as in everyone's life, sometimes you just have to take some time to do your little chores. As always, please feel free to review; the muse always enjoys honest feedback.

Always, LJ

* * *

**Jennet**

Buying a spaceship is a pain in the ass; don't let anyone convince you otherwise. Even with outstanding technological knowledge and flight experience, (Atton), ability to read the sales guy, (most of us), intimidation factors, (Kex and Dax) and charm enough to make a wookie smile (Ladria, Visas and Megari), it's STILL a grueling experience. As soon as the salesman, a Rodian with blue-green skin and an insincere smile, spotted Jedi, he put on aural dampeners to keep from being persuaded. I was rather irritated by the implied insult, myself, but Ladria just raised an eyebrow and smiled. The little man bustled up to us, tentacles quivering, sycophantic expression firmly in place.

"Ah, ladies, gentlemen, how can this humble person serve you today? I am Rahid, and I have good ships, good prices. I see you're looking at the latest Hawk class model, it is beautiful, yes? And such a bargain, only 50,000 credits, plus registration fees," he almost simpered, sensing a big sale.

Rodin's faces are hard to read, what with the huge pupil-less eyes, tubular mobile mouth, and habit of talking fast. They also prefer their own language as their vocal cords and mouth structure make it hard for them to use Galactic Basic. They make great salesmen – among other, less legitimate occupations - because most humans are somewhat prejudiced and don't pay as close attention to alien languages. Fortunately, as a race Rodians tend to be less than brilliant in the intelligence department, so they don't cheat people nearly as badly as most of them probably want to. As criminals, they often end up the scapegoat, being slow to see the setup. I've met a few very smart ones, but even they admitted their IQ was a rarity among their people. I smiled brilliantly at Rahid.

"I'm looking for a personal long-range ship, with dorm space and at least one private cabin, more than one 'fresher, and an adequate galley," I said, gazing at the spanking new Hawk class cruiser with admiration.

"Oh, yes missy, this Hawk is perfect," he simpered. "Very comfortable, very fast, lots of room. A bargain."

"More than I want to spend," I said dismissively, knowing 50,000 credits was at least 15,000 more than the usual list price. If this one was a basic, no frills model, you could take another 5,000 or more off, depending on what sort of engine it had.

I'd already done my research and had a working knowledge of the going rate for a good condition used or new personal ship with long-range capability and enough room to transport both people and cargo. Atton and Bao Dur had helped a lot in educating me. Basically, I wanted something along the lines of the Ebon Hawk, possibly a bit bigger. I expected that when we traveled it would be with at least some of the honor guard and I didn't relish sharing dorm space _or_ bathing facilities if I could help it. I was a decent pilot, Dax was much better and I assumed Canderous was pretty good too. With our tendency to find trouble, I also wanted something fast, maneuverable, and armed.

Rahid had six new in stock, and about a dozen used. I let Atton do a quick look over of the used and his verdict was that eight of those were barely flyable. We looked closer anyway, to see how much work they would take to make comfortable and, most important, safe. Three proved to appear worse than they actually were, the other five not worth the trouble. We saved the last four decent-looking ones for later. The salesman busily hovered around, naming ridiculously high prices for the new ones, slightly more reasonable for the obviously good condition used, and far more than they were worth quotes for the junkers.

We toured the new Hawk class simply because those types are reliable and can take a beating, as well as being fairly comfortable. And hey, a new ship is wonderful; fewer 'what the hell were they thinking' modifications to deal with. They also smell good. When you're traveling long distances, you literally live on board; I wanted to find something that would suit as a mobile home.

This model was an improvement on the Ebon Hawk as it had one tiny cabin that shared a 'fresher with a regular four-bunk dorm, and a larger Captain's cabin with its own decent sized bath facilities. Two more bunks were outside this cabin, with a third miniscule 'fresher tucked into a corner. It was barely big enough for the average sized Mandalorian male to turn around in, but it was adequate.

I liked this one well enough, and Hawks are almost always a good choice, according to Atton and Bao Dur. Take the Ebon Hawk, they had pointed out. She's a good ten years old, but was a stout ship that could take a beating, was well armed, and reasonably comfortable for crew to live on. She had a lot more light years in her, despite her adventures. Looking at this new model, I had to agree that it seemed as well-built, spacious, and as comfortable as a small non-luxury class ship can be. She had twin gun turrets, not just one, so defense was better, as well. Atton was happily poking around, opening doors and checking the engine room before heading to the cockpit, his approval obvious.

But I don't like buying big things without checking out all angles. I also didn't look forward to bargaining down to a reasonable amount from Rahid's ridiculously inflated quote. So we checked out all the new ships. I was hugely disappointed with the selection. Two were just slightly more than short-jump shuttles. Two were extremely scaled down; big on weaponry, low on personal comforts. The last one was inadequately armed, had only one big dorm, one tiny 'fresher, and I knew from unfortunate personal experience the kitchen synthesizers on board were of a manufacture that made everything taste like slightly moldy bread. Ugh.

Wrinkling my nose in distaste at the thought of meals on board this ship, I didn't even bother to ask Atton what the engines and cockpit looked like. He had trotted off straight away to inspect them. I was taking a step toward the cockpit to let him know I wasn't interested when he reappeared, a frown of disapproval on his handsome face. He gave me an eloquent look that suggested his opinion of me would crash and burn if I considered hitching a ride on this ship, let alone purchasing. I grinned, and shook my head. He nodded with approval.

Making sure our erstwhile salesman was out of earshot, Atton murmured, "The best so far is the Hawk. Great engines, and I'm itching to see how she handles. If she's better than the Ebon Hawk, it'll be a dream to fly her."

"I agree. But humor me, and let's see the last four," I answered in an equally quiet voice.

"Absolutely. But I have to say Bao Dur would love to tinker with the new Hawk. I'd bet within a week he'd have her outrunning anything of its class in the galaxy. As it is, only a Republic scout ship would have a chance of it," he said, practically dancing with glee.

"Well, fast is good," I smiled. "And I like the gun turrets; they're exceptionally good quality. It's also very comfortable, passenger-wise."

"Yeah, I figured you'd like the galley," Atton grinned. "It looks like it could keep up even with your appetite without the synthesizers exploding."

I elbowed him in a friendly manner and caught Dax and Mira laughing. I grinned back. Ladria, Visas and Megari had been poking around the cabins and dorms, and joined us in the main cabin.

"So what do you think?" Ladria asked politely.

I looked around to see where Rahid was. He was earnestly trying to talk to Kex, who was stoically ignoring him. I stifled a chuckle and quietly repeated Atton's and my plan. I saw the other three women's smiles fix a little. I wasn't surprised that another hour or two of inspecting space ships wasn't their idea of a fun time. Truthfully, it wasn't mine either, but I couldn't see any other way to acquire one.

"How about you guys go on and start your own shopping," I offered with an understanding smile. "No telling how long this will take, and there's no need at all for you to have to suffer along with me. If I'm really nice, will you pick me out a few more sets of clothes? Maybe even something a little less...practical? I'm hopeless when it comes to fashion."

"Of course," Ladria said, without the slightest hint of the relief I was sure she was feeling. The woman has class. Visas and Megari chimed in their gracious assent as well. I was somewhat surprised when Mira elected to go along with the ladies; I thought for certain she'd want to stay near Dax. But apparently girl time outweighed the joy of listening to the pros and cons of engine performance. Not that I blamed any of them; I would have loved to just let Atton choose something for me, and escape the tedious business of finding the perfect ship.

But Canderous would kill me if I left the honor guard, and it wasn't fair to let Atton shop alone without someone to share the chortling over lifter schematics. And it wouldn't really be _my_ present if I let Atton do all the looking.

_Buck up, Jax, _I told myself sternly. _It was your idea in the first place. And it's a good one, so quit whining._

The women left with a speed that confirmed their lack of enthusiasm of the finer points of personal transport. Dax and Kex reestablished themselves between me and any possible outside confrontation. Atton all but sprinted toward the next ship. I couldn't help but smile at his enthusiasm; he was like a child getting to choose a new toy.

An hour and three ships later, I was ready to throw it in and just start the haggle for the Hawk. Although they proved to be in decent working order, none of the three we'd seen so far were even close to being what I was looking for. One was designed for pure cargo hauling with the sleeping berths being little more than mattresses shoved in niches randomly scattered in various cargo holds, garage, and engine room. I almost couldn't find the 'freshers, they were so obviously an afterthought. The galley was surprisingly spacious and high quality, though. As for the other two, they were nice enough, sturdy, and relatively comfortable, but had room for only four passengers, and that if the pilot slept in the cockpit. Atton admired the third one especially, and I could see him practically rubbing his hands together, wishing to take it for a spin. But he regretfully admitted it wasn't what I needed, and we moved on to the last ship.

Atton hadn't done more than give the used models a quick once-over the first time around, basically checking for obvious damage and level of maintenance. We had checked more closely the ones that he'd initially dismissed, hoping to find something we could fix easily but argue down to a real bargain. We still had three of those in reserve, so to speak, one of which was another Hawk that had obviously seen better days and could have used more conscientious owners, but Atton felt Bao Dur could polish up. I approached this last ship thinking that if it proved inadequate, I'd take a better look at the used Hawk and make up my mind between it and the new one.

"Wait a minute," Atton said, stopping short. He stared hard at the rather funny-looking ship, his face starting to register excitement.

"What?" I asked, and looked around at Kex and Dax. They both were starting to look interested, and I shook my head, bewildered. It didn't look that special to me.

"I've never seen one, but I think this might be a Falcon class," Atton said with a hint of reverence. He obviously thought this was adequate explanation, and started to slowly walk around the ship, inspecting the hull and looking for model numbers. Rahid hadn't caught up yet, so we had a moment without him listening in.

"Oooookay," I said, exasperated. "Are they anything like Hawks?"

Actually, this did look a bit like the Ebon Hawk, but more streamlined, with the cockpit leading and the body of the ship curving back from it, rather than being nestled in between the two wings. Retractable gun turrets were on either side, and the loading ramp was in the rear, set back a little. It did look sturdy, and someone had taken good care of it, from the looks of the outside. But it didn't look special to my untrained eyes.

Atton looked at me in astonishment. "You're kidding, right? Falcons are supposed to be one of the best ships on the market. They're made by the same people that manufacture Hawks, but they're the elite class. Fast, very comfortable, and each one is custom-made. Every pilot in the galaxy has heard of them, but I've only met one that has ever flown one, and I wasn't sure he wasn't just trying to impress the girl he was with."

"So you're saying they're good ships, then," I said.

"Hell, lass, Falcons are the best of its class out there," Kex put in unexpectedly. "_I've_ always wanted to try one, and I'm not one to care over much about ships."

Dax's eyes were gleaming as he gazed at the Falcon. "I would've given my right, er, arm," he said with a quick glance at me, "to fly a broken down Falcon, let alone one in good shape. To find one new..." he trailed off, a dreamy look on his face. He wasn't the pilot Atton was, but then not many are. Dax was a good one though, and would likely be our primary pilot when traveling. He was obviously smitten with the idea of flying a Falcon.

"Well, let's take a look," I said, starting to get excited in spite of myself.

It was fabulous. Much like the new Hawk, it had two cabins, situated on either side of the ship. The larger Captain's cabin had a good sized 'fresher, complete with laundry recycle. The other cabin was smaller, and shared a bigger 'fresher with a five bunk dorm. Three bunks resided outside the larger cabin, with a third tiny 'fresher of their own. There was a galley big enough for two to work comfortably, three if you didn't mind squeezing a bit. All the food processors were the best to be found. The common area was large enough to seat twelve, with extra fold-away chairs tucked into a little storage area off the galley, along with two sturdy tables that broke down to compact flat packages. The tables and chairs could all be attached to the floor of the common room with a series of ingenious little automatic clamps.

There was less cargo space than either the Ebon Hawk or the new Hawk cruiser, but more than adequate space for anything we'd be hauling. The med bay had its own lab bench, and the garage was big enough for two swoop bikes or a medium sized speeder, with enough room left over for workspace and a built in workbench. The engine room was big enough to set up a camp bed for the duration of any trip, without having to break it down to work on said engines. The gun cannons were nearly new; they had been upgraded from the originals fairly recently.

Atton practically drooled on the instrument panel when we hit the cockpit. He was careful not to show too much enthusiasm in front of Rahid, though. He immediately checked the hyperdrive and gave me a nod and a wink, confirming it was excellent quality and in good working order. The seats were comfortable and sturdy, everything was in easy reach of even my shorter arms. They even had individual environmental controls. I sighed in pleasure.

"What's her name?" I asked Rahid, trying to sound offhand and only mildly interested.

"She a good ship, yes? Very clean, runs like a dream. Her name is Soul of the Phoenix," the little salesman said.

I had a vision of the Mandoa, rising from the ashes of their culture, becoming strong and a part of the life of the galaxy again.

I bought her on the spot.


	47. Chapter 47

Okay, I wasn't stupid. We took her for a spin, with all four of us trying out the controls. She flew beautifully, and Atton was nearly swooning with envy. I haggled and threatened and pretended to nearly walk away from the deal. But I'd made up my mind as soon as Rahid had told me her name; this was the ship I wanted. And in the end, for less credits than the real list price of the new Hawk, I was the proud owner of the five year old Falcon class cruiser Phoenix.

The entire process took another hour, but finally we were flying the Phoenix to her own hanger at the Iziz docks. As part of their services, the transport broker will help make arrangements for storage of the vehicles, if the customer wishes. For a surprisingly modest monthly fee, I could park the Phoenix in a private hanger as long as I needed to. Security was excellent, which relived my mind, considering that I wasn't actually residing on the same planet as the ship. I also had access to maintenance services ranging from simple cleanup to full restoration. I paid extra to have the Phoenix fueled up, provisioned, and completely cleaned, inside and out. Any actual maintenance and/or modifications I wanted to leave to Bao Dur.

_Not a bad day's work, _I thought with satisfaction as Atton commed the others and we headed out to catch up. _I just hope Canderous likes it._

We still had a couple of hours before we were due back at the hotel. Ladria, Mira, Megari and Visas had put their shopping time to excellent use, and were more than willing to pause for a quick snack break. I was hungry, and had missed lunch. Spotting a street vendor who sold delicious-smelling meat pies, I purchased enough to feed all of us. Munching the steaming savory pie, I proudly told the other women about the Phoenix, Atton and Dax chiming in with enthusiastic details.

"Sounds perfect," Mira said, smiling at our enthusiasm. I nodded happily back.

"So how are your errands going?" I asked generally.

"I think we're about finished up," Ladria said, indicating the satchels all four of them sported.

Megari's looked to be the most full, which only made sense, having even less than I did when I hooked up with the crew of the Ebon Hawk. I saw she was wearing a new outfit of a casual tunic and breeches with beautifully crafted boots which I bet Mira talked her into. Always pretty, she was especially so with her face flushed with the steam from her meat pie, the new pale blue tunic setting off her gorgeous purple eyes. She looked happy, and I was glad to see it.

"I don't have much else to do," I said. "I need to stop at the jeweler's and pick up my father's ring, and the tailor wants me to come by for a final fitting."

"Oh yes, clothing," Visas said, handing me another satchel. "Here is yours. We hope you like what we chose for you."

"I'm sure I'll love them," I said with a smile. "Thanks so much for doing that."

Arriving at the clothing shop, Dax and Kex stationed themselves outside the door, having first ascertained that it was the only way in or out. Atton elected to return to the hotel, grumbling about female shopping binges. I thanked him sincerely for all his help and promised that he'd have first shot of taking her for a real cruise soon. He smiled widely, and abruptly kissed Ladria soundly, much to her surprise and our amusement. He said something in her ear that I assumed would have made her blush if she wasn't so good about hiding her emotions. Waving to the rest of the party, he strode off.

No other customers entered while we five women went about our business. I was quite certain it was due to the forbidding-looking pair standing guard. I made a mental note to tip the seamstress handsomely, feeling guilty for possibly costing her sales.

The rest of the shopping went smoothly, even the irritating, boring business of standing still while the tailor made sure my wedding dress hung correctly. I flatly refused to wear the popular style that was so form fitting the bride was reduced to a mincing hobble. Nor had I wanted a bell-skirted monstrosity that had required a durasteel frame that she had suggested when I had been here with Elder Evana; the thing looked like you could hide a swoop bike under it. The dress I had chosen was a comfortable, sleeveless garment made of a silky pale blue fabric that skimmed my body without being overtly clingy. The skirt was draped in such a way that standing still it looked like a simple straight line, but in actual fact allowed me full range of motion. I can't stand clothes that don't allow me to move. That's biggest reason I rarely wear heels, despite my lack of height.

While I was suffering the tailor's clucking and poking, Megari was browsing the ready-made racks, choosing things to add to her and Danni's wardrobes. Ladria, Visas and Mira idly wandered around. I had an excellent view of most of the shop in the mirror, and saw them approach a table full of rather racy underthings. To my amusement, with studied nonchalance Ladria sifted through the offerings, chose a few and paid the woman at the counter. Mira sorted through the table with enthusiasm, gathering a substantial collection in a colorful pile. I resolved to check it out myself when the tailor released me.

Megari was still adding to her pile of clothes when I was finally free, so I had a little time to look. I made my choices, and paid as she was stowing the last of her purchases in her satchel. We left, considerably more laden, although I was surprised how compact the capes and wedding dress actually folded down to. I was pleased that the capes I had ordered earlier were ready to go, and the dress hadn't needed any last adjustments; the seamstress had simply wanted to make certain of the fit. I didn't mind her being meticulous, even though I really hate to have to stand so still. She had done a beautiful job.

I had dropped off my father's wedding ring at the jeweler's as we had left the hotel. I knew Mandalorians didn't customarily wear rings, and didn't actually expect Canderous to. I did hope he would understand why I offered it though, and wanted him to have it. I had thought about it for some time after I had emptied my lockbox. I knew my father would have liked Canderous, once he got over him being Mandalorian. However, Dad had been built more like Atton, although a good ten centimeters shorter, and he had had slender, long-fingered hands; the ring _might_ fit Canderous' pinky. I had estimated how much to size it and hoped I had guessed right. After collecting it, we headed back to the hotel.

Everyone scattered to their various rooms, and I trudged toward mine, Mira, Dax and Kex in tow. My bodyguards refused to let me out of their sight until I was safely in Canderous' keeping, and I had assured Mira that Dax was free to go once we got there. Canderous and I had gotten a three bedroom suite, so that the honor guard could stay with us and still ensure privacy all around. I knew Mira had taken a room by herself, and that likely we wouldn't see either Dax or Mira until the next day. I made shooing motions at the pair of them as Kex followed me into the suite. Grinning, they waved back and disappeared down the hall. Kex grunted something I chose to think was a friendly 'see you' noise and headed to the room he was sharing with Kelborn and, theoretically, Dax.

"How did your errands go, Wildcat?" Canderous asked after giving me a thorough and toe-tingling kiss hello.

"Very well," I said enthusiastically. "I have a few things to share with you later," I added with a suggestive wink.

"Do you now?" He said, quirking an eyebrow.

His grin turned wolfish, and I restrained myself from grabbing him and dragging us to our room. I was hungry; the meat pie had barely taken the edge off. Hmmm. Sex, or food? I was about to ignore the hunger pangs and suggest I give him a private fashion show of my new underwear when my stomach disagreed with me loudly. I sighed.

"Let's get you fed, Wildcat," Canderous said with a rumbling chuckle. "I can see your new…outfit…later," he hastily amended his original choice of words as Kelborn, Xarga, Zuka and Tagren wandered in. I gave him a rueful smile and agreed.

After checking if Kex wanted to come along, the seven of us headed to a nearby cantina that the hotel clerk assured us had excellent food as well as every imaginable alcoholic beverage in the galaxy. Shortly, we were seated and digging in to a most delicious meal. The waiter was a little nervous having six large, fierce looking Mandalorian warriors at his table, but relaxed a little when he saw how much we ordered. Having just put out about half the value of my parent's estate, I refused to let the size of our bill to bother me.

Dinner was lively enough. Canderous gave an edited version of his conversation with Carth Onasi. I was receiving the full version mentally while he talked and was impressed all over again that he actually _knew_ the man. He did share with everyone his little joke concerning me, and while I didn't really approve, I couldn't help but laugh.

"You should have seen him, cyar'ika. He was astonished I was getting married in the first place, and it was so obvious he expects you to be something just short of a Sith Lord," Canderous said almost gleefully, his chuckle rumbling around the table.

"I suppose that's better than a cantina whore," I said sweetly, causing Zuka to nearly choke on his food. The rest of them laughed. Canderous shook his head.

"I'll never live that one down, will I?" He sighed.

"Nope," I said cheerfully.

We finished up our meal, and decided to explore the cantina further. The dining area was set apart from the other entertainments, although they had a small Bith band playing quietly in the background. We wandered about, gaining a few dirty looks from other customers that were quickly concealed when one of our party looked directly their way. I thought at first it was because the honor guard insisted on surrounding Canderous and me; six Mandalorians take up a lot of room. Plus none of the honor guard were being particularly polite about getting people out of their way. They weren't overtly shoving or being verbally abusive. They simply walked the direction they wanted, and expected anyone in their path to move. Unsurprisingly, this worked.

Gradually I realized that the hostility I was feeling wasn't so much due to our bodyguards' attitude as the simple fact they were Mandalorian. And, after a moment of monitoring the mood, to my astonishment I understood that many of the people in the room were eyeing _me_ with disdain. I was bewildered.

_Why is half the bar looking at me like I sold the Republic to the Sith?_ I asked Canderous. _And the other half like they expect you guys to help negotiate the contract? Wait, okay, I get that…if I didn't know you six, I might be scared too._

_The hell you would, _Canderous answered with an inward chuckle. _Cautious, maybe._

_Do you even _know _what you look like to someone who doesn't know you? _I asked rather tartly.

_Depends on what you mean by that, Wildcat, _he replied, amused. _And to be frank, I don't really care. Nor should you._

I thought about that, and nodded. _Maybe not. But suddenly, I don't really feel like hanging around for a drink._

_We can leave if you like…_

_But you don't think we should. Why? _I had caught the disapproval in his tone.

He sighed in my head. _People fear and dislike my kind, and for good reason, _he said simply. _You can leave, and hide from it, or you can face it down. Your choice._

I sighed back. _You're right. We'll stay._

_That's my girl, _he said approvingly.

We found a table, and ordered. I chose wine, and asked for water as well. The Mandalorians ordered several pitchers of ale. The waitress, a pretty Twi'lik with gray eyes and lovely blue-green skin, jotted down the selections and left as hastily as she could. I could feel her nervousness and carefully masked hostility and tried to smile at her reassuringly. She gave me a brief searing glance as she retreated and I tried not to let it bother me.

Our drinks arrived quickly, and I read between the lines that it was a subtle hint to drink up and get out. As I was assimilating this, a large man who looked as if he could take any one of our party on without breaking a sweat approached. He was beefy, practically without a neck, and while he was a head shorter than Canderous he was nearly as broad. He wasn't, however, Mandalorian; no clan tattoo on his upper arm, which the cut off sleeves of his stretched to the limit shirt showed clearly. His face might once have been handsome, but at some point he'd broken a cheekbone that hadn't been properly healed; it gave him a slightly lopsided look. Plus his nose had been rearranged so many times that it was wide and flatish, contrasting oddly with the strong square jaw and high undamaged cheekbone.

"I'm sorry, but no underage allowed here," he said in a calm, almost friendly tenor, much higher than I had expected.

"Huh?" I said, looking around. Then I realized he meant me. I laughed in surprise.

"She's of age," Canderous assured him.

I smiled, giving him a nice display of teeth. He didn't return it. I sighed, and dug for my Republic ID, handing it over. He scanned it critically, relenting when he couldn't find any sign of it being forged.

"Sorry, miss," he said, handing it back. "You're just small for a Mandalorian; I assumed your father didn't know we were a restricted cantina. Nothing personal."

"No problem," I said with a friendly smile. "You have a bar to run, after all. And he's not my father."

"Oh," he said, looking uncomfortable. "Well, enjoy your evening."

He wandered away. As I was stowing my ID card, I was startled to find a folded piece of paper tucked behind it. Curious, I smoothed it out. In a hastily scrawled hand, it read:

_I can help you get away. Get to the 'fresher and we'll smuggle you out. Don't worry, we'll take care of your captors._

I stared at the paper, not sure whether to laugh, cry, or throw things. I had been blocking the mood around me as best I could, knowing that a good many people in the bar seemed to think I was either being coerced or, worse, voluntarily fraternizing with whom they viewed as little better than animals. While I wanted to scream, I also had to admire the guy for his guts; he really did seem to think he was rescuing me.

"I think," I said slowly, "We ought to get out of here when we're done with our drinks."

"What do you have there, cyar'ika?" Canderous asked, taking the paper from my numb fingers. He read it, and his face blanked.

"I see." He ran his hand through his hair and down his face. "Well, can't say I'm that surprised. Brave fellow," he added as an afterthought. He passed the note discretely to Kelborn, who scowled briefly upon reading it, then went as blank as Canderous. The other four had nearly the same reaction.

"If we try to leave right away, he'll likely take that as evidence that I _am_ with you against my will," I said just loud enough for our table to hear. "If we stay too long…well….I just don't like this at all," I said a little lamely.

"Nothing we can do about it, unless we want to start a brawl. Not that I mind that idea," Canderous said with a sudden wicked grin. "But I don't fancy watching Atton's glee as the others bail us out of the local jail."

"Speak for yourself, Mandalore," Xarga grinned. "I don't plan on being taken alive."

"Oh, that's a real help," I said irritably.

"Might not have a choice," Tagren said, starting to grin himself. He pointed with his chin over Canderous' head, and we turned to see about six large guys approaching the table. Two had vibroswords, the other four blasters, and they looked ready to use them. I slowly eased my chair a little away from the table, ready to grab my swords, and felt Canderous go on full alert.

_Let me handle this, _I said to Canderous, and after a pause, he nodded.

_Give it a shot, Wildcat, _he answered, and gave a subtle signal to the others to be alert, but not try anything…yet.

I smiled brightly at the approaching party. "Good evening, gentlemen," I said in my friendliest voice.

"Miss, you can come out of there," the one who seemed to be in charge said without preamble. He was nearly as big as the bouncer who had slipped me the note, as were the rest of his companions. He had a nice face, though, and a quick scan of his aura showed me he was honestly trying to help me. Wonderful. "You don't have to stay with this rabble."

A low growl only I heard reverberated through my head. I shook it off, still smiling, but casually put my hands closer to the hilt of my blades.

"I think there's a misunderstanding here," I said easily. "I'm fine where I am, and my husband would object to losing my company. Let me buy you nice men a drink, I do appreciate your concern."

"Husband?" he said, clearly thrown. Then he scowled. "You're far too small to be Mandalorian."

Why do people seem to love pointing out the obvious? Like I hadn't noticed by the permanent crick in my neck that I don't look the rest of the world in the eye?

"I'm not," I answered shortly. No pun intended. "Not that it's your business. Now, how about that drink?" I smiled. less winningly.

He looked at me long and hard, and I stared him down. "You're either lying, or have incredibly bad taste in men," he finally said. "Where did they take you from?"

"Look, mister, I've tried to be reasonable," I said, shifting gears and giving him my coldest look. "I am here, having a drink with my husband and his kin, and it's none of your concern. Go away now, there's a good fellow."

Canderous and the others were glaring daggers at the intruders, who were starting to look nervous. But the man with the nice face continued to stare at me, frowning. I scowled back.

"Try to help someone," he said, not quite sneering. "I never thought I'd see the day when a woman of ours would choose to keep company with this trash. You're either brainwashed, or crazy."

I'd had it, and jumped to my feet. Canderous and the others followed suit. The disapproval of the bar in general and these men in particular had been buzzing around me like a persistent insect and I was getting cranky. I'm not used to being hated by otherwise nice people that don't even know me. At worst, I was used to being invisible.

Nice face's companions looked like they wanted to back up but stood their ground.

"I am neither brainwashed nor crazy." I used my calmest, most reasonable voice, but inside I was seething. "You have courage, which is all that is keeping me and these men from challenging you for your insults. We are not looking for trouble. Walk away. Now."

For the first time, he seemed to notice that I was armed. He took in my stance, my blades, the calm determination on my face, the fire in my eye and suddenly, truly understood I didn't need or want help.

"Take this outside," the voice of the bouncer cut through the tension.

I continued to lock eyes with my would-be rescuer. He and his buddies seemed relieved at the interruption, and I smiled in satisfaction.

"No problem," I said coolly. I gave Nice Face a look that told him I saw his fear. "We were just leaving."

I threw some credits on the table and stalked past the hostile party. Grim-faced, the Mandalorians followed. I was so angry I couldn't see straight. Snarling with frustration, rage, and, although I didn't want to admit it, humiliation, I punched the side of the building hard enough to crack a knuckle. I barely felt the pain.

"Damn it," Tagren said regretfully. "That could have been fun."


	48. Chapter 48

**Canderous**

_Not that I don't appreciate the good behavior, but why were the others so calm in the face of that idiot? I expected them to start swinging. None of them even look insulted. _

Jennet's voice in my head was one part relieved, one part surprised, and one part annoyed. I smiled grimly, and put an arm around her. She was shivering a little, the rage ebbing but the implications of the bar's attitude starting to sink in. To most anyone else, though, she probably looked perfectly calm and composed. Well, except the broken hand. I clenched my own fist by reflex; I had felt her knuckle smash when she hit the brick wall. There was a chip in the stone where her fist had impacted and I admired again how strong she actually was, especially when pissed.

_I told them not to,_ I said simply. _They also knew you didn't want them to start a fight. They might not appreciate civilized behavior, but they _do _appreciate and admire _you_. Plus, I don't think you realize how impressed they are by you standing up for them._

_Why the fuck wouldn't I?_ She asked irritably.

We had started walking down the street, the honor guard in place around us, but she had stopped dead at my comment and looked at me, honestly surprised.

_You're my Mate, true. But you were also an outlander. Tonight, you showed them you are truly Mandoa. They're proud that you're one of us._

_Some Mandalorian I am. If I really was, we'd still be in there, smashing heads and probably waking up in a prison cell, _she said wryly.

_Maybe, _I agreed. _But it would sure play hell with diplomatic negotiations when Onasi got here. You did the right thing, and they know it. Besides, you don't think every one of us hasn't played out a similar scene at least a few times? If I know my men, they're mostly amused that those people think you're an unwilling captive, when you could wipe the floor with the entire bar, including them. They love that, believe me, and they're right now prouder than shit you chose them over those bigoted fools._

_I used to be one of those bigoted fools. _Jennet sounded sad.

_Never, _I answered. _You traveled with two Mandalorians before you ever met me._

"Heal yourself, lass," Kex broke in to our silent conversation. "You don't want to end up like I was."

Jennet smiled at him, and I felt her healing energy intensify as it mended her hand. The faint pain in my own faded to nothing.

"Sorry I spoiled your fun," she said to the men in general.

"What, that rabble? Wouldn't make a decent brawl, anyway," Xarga scoffed.

"Not worth the trouble," Kelborn assured her.

"We probably would have just sat back and watched you clean out the room," Xarga offered. "The only disappointment I have is not getting to see it. Would have been bloody fantastic, that."

"I wanted to," Jennet assured him.

"Well, there you go," he grinned. "Almost as good."

"Head's up lads, this ain't over yet," Tagren observed, and we turned to see about twenty guys coming out of the bar, stopping short as they spotted us about a block away. At the head of the pack was Nice Face. I had heard Jennet use this designation in her mind in the bar, and I couldn't say I agreed with it. I heard Jennet sigh.

"Well," she said fatalistically, "At least they won't be adding destruction of private property to the list of crimes at our trial."

"Not to worry darlin'," Kex said behind me. "if they start it, the only reason we'd be in court is to testify against them."

"And if they're dead, we won't even have to do that," Xarga added helpfully.

"No killing," Jennet ordered.

"Well, now, if they draw first, I'd have to disagree with that one," Kelborn said thoughtfully. "But I'd be willing to settle for just beating the shit out of them."

"Jennet's right, men," I rumbled. "Unless they use deadly force, I don't want to see a weapon drawn."

There was a general grumble of disappointment, but I knew they'd obey.

"Let's just go," Jennet said softly. "I don't like their attitude, but no one has to get hurt. They're not worth it."

"Probably not," I said, "But it's too late now."

The party from the bar had nearly caught up. About half looked fairly intoxicated and I regretfully realized that the brawl that we'd avoided inside wasn't going to be nearly as much fun as expected outside. Much better when the parties involved are either all smashed, or sober. Evens the playing field.

Jennet caught that and had just enough time to scowl at me before Nice Face and his pals were on us. I grinned back, unrepentant.

"So," he said with a sneer, "if it isn't the Mandalorian pack and their little whore. Thought you'd be long gone."

I eyed the man like the bug he was, and smiled. I had the satisfaction of seeing him blanch.

"The last person to call my lady that ended up with her blade in their gullet," I said conversationally. "And you'll wish I was that easy on you if you don't apologize to my wife."

_Well, that was a big help._ Jennet said, more resigned than irritated. _But thank you, love._

"And if I don't?" he asked belligerently, with the smirk of one confident he had the enemy outnumbered.

"Well, here's the thing," I said with my best friendly grin. He suddenly looked very uneasy, and my smile widened. "I promised her I wouldn't kill anyone tonight. I didn't promise I wouldn't make anyone wish they were dead."

His eyes narrowed, and he drew himself to his full height. I was impressed by his bravado, but I'd seen the fear in his eyes. I could admit that in the bar, his intentions had been honorable, if misguided and bigoted. But he'd degenerated to blustering bully, and that I had no respect for. And after his crack about Jennet, I had lost any patience I might have for his attitude.

"Twenty one against six," he scoffed. "They won't find all the pieces when we're done with you."

If I was ever in any doubt of his being a bully, that removed it. He seemed supremely unconcerned that he and his friends were willing to attack us three-to-one. Of course, with the Mandalorian reputation for fighting, it could be he thought of it as good sense.

"That would be twenty one against _seven_," Jennet said sweetly. "And I'm waiting for my apology."

"Little girls get hurt when they play with the big boys," Nice Face said, his face twisting into an ugly mask. "Enjoy being a widow."

With that, he swung at me, and all hell broke loose. I was surprised; he actually seemed to know what he was doing. Even so, I blocked the shot he'd taken at my face easily enough, and responded with a vicious hit to the gut. He whooshed as most of the air left his lungs, but managed to keep himself upright and fall back to regroup. I followed up with a spinning kick to his side and he went down. Then three of his buddies were on me, and the fight was on.

I felt Jennet, unlike when she was armed, start picking around the edges of the crowd, careful not to strike with killing blows and trying to keep from getting surrounded. The rest of our men waded in, grinning like fools and whooping, fists and feet flying. My battle ecstasy kicked in and I felt it merge with Jennet's Force abilities. The curious sensation of watching her fight while attending my own part of the battle came over me. I grinned savagely as I watched her gracefully dance under the flailing extremities around her. She dropped low to avoid getting her head bashed in, then took out two; one with a brutal kick to the nuts and the other by popping up and slamming her elbow into his throat. The man in front of me recoiled at the look on my face and I knocked him out with a punch to the head.

The crowd thinned out some and out of the corner of my eye I saw Xarga, Zuka, and Kelborn station themselves into containment formation, dropping back to pick off strays while Kex and Tagren remained in the thick of it with me and Jennet. I felt my wildcat make her way to me, and we fought back to back, spinning in time with each other's moves, kicking and punching anything that came near. She saw through our shared vision that I had four in front of me, and of the two she had, one went down with a well-timed head kick and the other spun to be summarily dispatched by Xarga.

Without any actual dialogue between us, but perfect understanding, I reached behind me, hooked her arms, and felt her clench her elbows around mine as I flipped her over my back. She flew over my head, using the Force to assist her, and landed in a half-crouch literally on the shoulders of the man directly in front of me. Without missing a beat, she shoved off, kicking him in the back of the head as she did so, and landed behind the other three. A swift low sweep of her leg and two went down, assisted into unconsciousness by Tagren and Kex. Leaping up, she spun again and got another square under the jaw with a solid kick. I took care of the one remaining in front of me, and spun to face the next opponent.

But there wasn't another. The seven of us stood among twenty one fallen men in the middle of the street, breathing hard but relatively undamaged. Nice Face was crawling to his feet, and Jennet went over to him.

"I appreciate what you thought you were doing," she said quietly. "But I don't care what you think. Keep any apology you might have; it wouldn't mean anything anyway."

Then she did something that floored me. I felt her healing go into high gear, and she healed _everyone._ None on our side were terribly battered, but Nice Face's gang had taken a brutal beating. The split lip and swollen eye of our antagonist's face melted back to healthy unmarked skin, and the pained groaning around us faded. Still in tune with her Force abilities, I could tell that she didn't have enough to fix everything. But still, it seemed the worst of the damage was gone, and the unconscious were stirring.

"Maybe next time, you'll realize things aren't always what you think," she said.

Nice face stared at her, mouth open. I chuckled to myself; he really did look ridiculous.

"Let's go, guys," Jennet said with dignity, and looping her arm through mine, led us down the street.

I snuck a look back, and saw the leader still on his knees, staring in astonishment.

"Why'd you do that, lass?" Kex asked crankily. "It's no fun if they don't hurt in the morning."

"Let them prove there was a fight if they lodge a complaint to the local magistrate," Jennet said. "Not that I really expect them to; who wants to admit so many got their asses whipped by so few, and one of them a woman?"

_And maybe by doing that, the asshole might think about jumping to conclusions in the future. You could have let him bleed, and he knows it, _I observed, understanding now.

_Something like that. I really don't want any proof of a fight either. This way, it's far more our word against theirs, and I know Onderon; they won't arrest without real evidence. I did live here once._

_So you did._

"That flip thing you did over the Mandalore's head," Xarga said with awe, "that was amazing. Where did you learn to fight like that?"

"My parents, mostly," Jennet said, shrugging. "Other fighters I've met over the years. Dad figured out early I was never going to be big, so he worked with me from the beginning to use my size as an advantage."

"I wouldn't of thought of it that way," Xarga said thoughtfully, "but you're right…we're all in good shape, and can jump well enough, but none of us could pull off that move."

"I had a little help," Jennet said, smiling at me.

I grinned back, chuckling. "Don't let her fool you, boys. I've seen her jump straight over a man's head from a dead start on the ground, _and_ manage to get a blow in as she did. The day I met her, she killed a merc by sheathing a vibrosword in his head as she sailed over."

"I jumped from a table to do that," she protested, but was starting to laugh.

"True," I agreed. "But I've seen you jump higher, without assistance. And catching two plasma grenades when they were _behind_ you to begin with, then throwing them back at the, what was it? Eight? Twelve? More mercs all firing away at you, with enough time to throw yourself at me and get us both out of the way…that was fast."

The men, started at Jennet, mouths slightly open.

Kelborn finally found his voice. "You did _what?_"

"Well, Canderous got me out of there…I was sort of knocked out by that move," Jennet said modestly.

"The best any one of us can do when grenades are thrown is get the hell out of the way," Xarga said wonderingly. "You _caught _them, and _threw them back_?"

"Um…" Jennet seemed at a loss of what to say. "Yeah."

"She did," I confirmed. "I saw it, and almost got my fool ass killed, I was so stunned. If it hadn't been for the large hole in the cantina wall, I would have believed I was seeing things."

"Not that I would ever doubt your word, Mandalore," Xarga said carefully, "and we've all seen Jennet fight. I think at this point if you told us she hung upside down from an invisible airspeeder and armwrestled a Lagarotz dragon, I'd believe you. But what you are saying is nearly impossible. I believe it happened, but it had to be lucky timing."

"Probably," Jennet said as at the same time I answered, "Nope."

We looked at each other, and she shrugged. I quirked an eyebrow at her, and answered Xarga.

"Jennet's modest, and she doesn't want to embarrass anyone by bragging. Give her some time, and she'll truly realize that Mandalorians revere those that can outfight us; she's just used to a less honest social circle," I explained cheerfully.

Jennet snorted, but less irritably than she probably would have yesterday. Nice Face and his bigoted buddies had been an eye-opener for my friendly wildcat.

"What the Mandalore says is true, my lady," Kelborn said, smiling.

Jennet started at the quasi-title; it was the first time anyone, besides me, had called her that; not even Dax had done so. She caught from me that 'my lady' or simply 'lady' was an affectionate diminutive for the more formal 'runi riduur Mandalore'. That, more than almost anything, was a mark of how accepted she had become. She smiled back at Kelborn a little shyly, but didn't comment. I could hear how flustered and pleased she was but she held herself together; sloppy sentiment is not something that would go over well.

"Give me some time, I'll get used to bragging rights," she said easily, and the men grinned.

"But really, lady, that feat with the grenades is amazing," Xarga persisted. "Any way you could show it to us?"

"I have no idea," Jennet said thoughtfully. "Usually in a fight, I just do what needs to be done; there's not a lot of conscious thought involved, you understand."

Nods went all around; everyone to a man understood that feeling. You start with a plan, and execute it to the best of the circumstances, but no fight goes the way you imagine it; something always happens that's unexpected. Improvisation and instinct play a huge part of any battle.

We'd been walking toward the hotel as we talked, and were passing an empty rocky space between two buildings. Zuka, who was taciturn enough to make the rest of us seem chatty, had unsurprisingly not participated much in the conversation. He was behind us, and I caught movement out of the corner of my eye. Jennet whirled and caught the stone he had thrown with considerable force one-handed. She glared at him, but reluctantly grinned when he simply smiled.

"I'd say it was true," he said, and started walking again.

Jennet tossed it playfully back at him, and we made our way back to the hotel.


	49. Chapter 49

Author's note: I just finished playing KOTOR I for the second time, and this run through I noticed that Canderous had a tattoo. I did my best to see exactly what it looked like, but couldn't get a real clear picture. So I've taken artistic license on its design. If I am being honest, I admit would have done so even if I had a detailed diagram in front of me; it was just too perfect to resist.

Enjoy, and feel free to review!

Always, LJ

* * *

Filing into our room, the honor guard sprawled themselves around the living area, punching up a holovid on the enormous viewscreen. Finding some mindless adventure tale, they contented themselves with making derisive comments about the fake fighting and admiring ones about the scantily clad women the 'heroes' were protecting. To a man, they casually ignored us, obviously expecting Jennet and I to disappear into our own bedroom for more private entertainment. I grinned; it was just what I had in mind. Jennet had already slipped away to freshen up. I gave her about ten minutes and followed.

I found her on the balcony, gazing over the lights of the city. She had changed from her usual pants, tunic, and boots to a soft green filmy thing that hinted at being see-through but in truth only showed her silhouette with the lights behind her. She had her back to me, elbows on the rail, staring dreamily into the distance. I admired the lines of her body in the moonlight, strong and slim and very female. I knew I'd never stop wanting her, and wondered again what it was she saw in me.

"You see me," she said, not turning around, but answering my thoughts. "I had to hide for so long that I was starting to feel I was invisible. But you saw what and who I was, and love me for it."

She turned, and smiled. "And I see you too, even when you don't."

She held out a hand, and I swiftly moved to take it. Gathering her close, I kissed her with everything I was, and felt her melt into me. _This_, I realized, was truly what Mates were; not being whole without the other, yet being ourselves, no, _better_ than we were before, when we're apart. I could die tomorrow, and I knew Jennet would survive. She might be bitter for a while, and lost, and certainly grieve for me for the rest of her life. But she'd survive, and go on, because she'd never really lose me. I was a part of her, beyond space, time or even death. And she was all that and more to me. Three weeks ago, I would have scoffed to be told such a thing was possible. Romantic twaddle, I'd have called it. But I held the proof of it in my hands, and I was never going to let it go.

I remembered what I had said to Revan five years ago, near the end of that mission. I had changed inside, and knew it, and I had told her I was her man, no matter how this thing played out. I meant it, too; if she had gone to the dark side again, I would have followed. More than that - I would have reveled in it, secure that I had found a place, and a master that accepted what I was. But she hadn't, and I was forced to travel the harder path. Trying to live in the light, to give something back, rather than just take. I was now grateful beyond words that Revan had not fallen, or I would have never really understood. I would never have found Jennet. And she would never have looked at me like this.

For the first time in my life, I prayed for someone that wasn't me or a part of my clan. I sent a feverent silent hope that Revan will survive, and come home to Carth. She deserved happiness, for all she had given me, and what she had sacrificed to see that others could live.

Jennet heard my thoughts, and approved. She kissed me back, meeting her soul with mine, and I wanted to drown in her warmth. Before that warmth became the raging fire we both wanted it to become, she pulled back a little and reached up, tracing the line of my jaw with one finger.

"I have something for you," she said, her voice husky.

"That you do," I agreed, pulling her closer and letting her feel my arousal more fully. "If you behave, I'll have a thing or two for you."

"That, too," she laughed, rubbing against me teasingly. "But it's something else. Stay here, I'll be just a minute."

She slipped out of my arms, and I reluctantly let her go for the moment. Disappearing into the bedroom, she soon came back with a small box in her hand, and…a light saber? I looked at her, confused, as she handed it to me.

"I know you can't be Jedi; I couldn't care less. I'm still not entirely certain _I_ want to be," she added softly.

"I don't think you have a choice there, Wildcat," I said seriously. "The way I see it, you already are."

"Maybe," she said dismissively. "But that's not the issue right now. This 'saber was my mother's. I've got my father's two as well; you saw me use them at Falken Rikes' estate. I may start using them regularly, I don't know. They certainly were handy in that battle, and swords just don't compare…although my spinning blades come close," she said with a smile.

I examined the 'saber curiously, testing its grip and trying to see how it worked. To my utter shock, it ignited with a bright yellow glow that illuminated the balcony. I almost dropped it in startlement. Jennet smiled wider.

"I thought so," she said, delighted.

"Thought what?" I asked with a rumble.

"You have to be somewhat Force sensitive to ignite a light saber," she explained carefully. "You're not sensitive enough to be trained, but you can light a 'saber."

"I'd bet it's because of you," I said dismissively. I was more shaken than I wanted to admit that it had come alive for me.

"Probably," Jennet agreed. "But I'm not giving it to you because I expect you to wield it. Of course, if you want to, go for it. Mom would approve, I think."

"You sure about that?" I asked sardonically. I knew little of her mother beyond the few stories Jennet had told me and the flashes I got off her from time to time. It seemed to me even a Jedi that left the Order wouldn't approve of a Mandalorian using their sacred weapon.

"Well…pretty sure," Jennet amended. "She might have protested at first, but after seeing us together, I know she would have liked you. And so would Dad."

Since this is pretty much the attitude I expected my own parents would have had, I couldn't argue the assessment. I smiled and shrugged.

"Good to know," I said gruffly.

"I want you to have this for another reason, though," Jennet continued. "I expect we'll have children some day, and it's a better than even chance at least one if not more will have the makings of a Jedi."

"More?" I said with a leer. "We'll never have them if we don't practice. A lot."

She answered this tease by standing on tiptoe and kissing me quite thoroughly. Stepping a little away, she grinned.

"Oh, we'll get in some practice. Soon," she promised. "This 'saber," she gestured at the weapon in my hand, "is all I have left of the Jedi part of my mother, besides her teachings. I want you to keep it, and give it to whatever child we have that proves Force sensitive. They don't have to become Jedi if they don't want to. But I want them to have it, and that option. Coming from you, they'll know that whatever path they choose has both of our approval."

As I looked at the woman that had changed my world, I understood what she meant. I thought of the generations of Mandoa that had never felt the Force, and realized that through her, my children, if we had any, had a chance of being a part of that connection. Having felt it myself, I suddenly wanted very badly for them to experience that sense of serenity and being a part of something bigger than themselves. I nodded slowly.

"Thank you," I said gravely. "I'll keep it safe."

"I know you will," Jennet said serenely. Then she handed me what was in her other hand. "I also want you to have this."

Without thinking, I hooked the 'saber to my belt so both hands would be free to open the tiny box. I found myself looking at a ring, bright steel with a dark blue stone, polished but unfaceted. I recognized it as a crystal that was commonly used in 'sabers to give the blade color. I may not have known I could use one until now, but I'd seen enough Jedi tinkering with their weapons to realize what it was. I thought the ring must have been her father's, and I carefully removed it from its velvet nest.

"It was Dad's wedding ring," Jennet said, confirming my guess. "I know Mandalorians don't wear rings. You don't have to wear it. I just wanted you to have it."

I tilted it to catch as much light as the dim balcony offered and saw inscribed inside the letters M and D intertwined on one side in a slightly faded script. On the opposite side, J and C were inscribed with the same design in sharp new engraving. Between the two sets of initials, the word 'Always' was carved into the band, also obviously recently done. I swallowed, not used to feeling sentimental. Slipping it on to my left ring finger, it fit perfectly, and felt like it had always been there.

"Of course I'll wear it," I said, reaching for her and holding her close. She snuggled with a sigh, and my heart turned over. Only with her could I feel that and not want to walk away. I kissed the top of her head.

"Tell me about your father," I said abruptly.

I was wearing his ring, and suddenly wanted to know more about the man that had raised her. I felt her startlement at the change of mood, but she relaxed as she felt my sincere curiosity. She tilted her head to look at me, as if searching for a trace of him in my face.

"He wasn't tall," she said with a smile. "Only about average height, really, but built like Atton; muscled but not bulky. When I was a child, though, I thought he was the tallest man in the galaxy. He was fast, and moved a lot like you, like a cat after prey. He laughed a lot, and loved to tease people. I got my hair and eyes from him, and he liked to tug on my curls. He'd apologize for my woolly-head, as he'd call it. He grew his long, to hide the curls, and tied it back with a leather thong. Mine was long then too. I cut it after Mom died; it was so hard to keep up and too easy for an opponent to grab."

"I'd like to see it long," I said, touching the tumbled spirals.

"I was thinking about growing it out," she said, and I nodded with approval.

"I saw your father in your dreams once," I said, smiling. "He was showing you how to throw a dagger, and laughing."

"I remember that day," Jennet said wistfully. "We spent hours throwing at targets. It took me a week to throw properly, and he was so proud."

"What about your mother? I saw her too. You look like her, except the hair and eyes. You definitely have her nose." I touched the tip of it lightly.

"I'm not nearly as pretty," she laughed.

"I'd have to disagree with that, Wildcat," I said easily, and she chuckled again.

"You're biased," she said, waving a hand dismissively. "Mom was quieter, even when Dad was alive. But he could always get her to laugh, and talk, and she was full of fun when he was around. Dad trained me in combat more than she did, but she drove me even harder, in a lot of ways. She was an amazing healer, and had a touch of Seer ability. I remember she hadn't wanted to leave on the trip that took us off planet when Dad died, and they'd had a rare argument about it. She hadn't known exactly what would happen, but she knew the instant Dad was dead. She tried to hide it from me, but I knew something was wrong." Jennet frowned, her eyes focused inward, and I regretted having brought up the memory.

"It's okay," she said, looking up and catching the thought. "It was a long time ago. I miss them both, but they taught me well, and they're with me still. Mom quit laughing much after Dad died, but she loved me. We managed. She told me once that I was the best gift Dad ever gave her, and I know she meant it. I knew at the end, she regretted leaving me, but wanted to be with Dad more. I understand that now," she said softly, touching my face. Unconsciously, she ran a finger down the bridge of my nose, the same gesture she had used the first time we were together.

I took the hand away from my face and kissed the palm, watching her eyes as I did. Her eyes had that same look, wide and soft and anticipating. The spark that was always there ignited, and I pulled her roughly against me, devouring her mouth. The fire burned higher, and she met my desire with her own, sweet and demanding. Not wanting to give our neighbors a show, I scooped her up and carried her into the bedroom.

We fell on the bed, fumbling at clothing and trying to get as close as possible. Her nails raked my back and I rumbled with pleasure. She pulled away just long enough to gracefully slide her garment over her head and toss it aside.

_I just got this; don't you dare tear it, _was her breathless comment in my head.

_I don't care how you get naked, Wildcat, _I answered, amused. _Just as long as it's soon._

_I could say the same to you, _she purred back.

I stood to remove my pants, my shirt being somewhere between the balcony door and the bed. I remembered the lightsaber I'd clipped to my belt. Carefully detaching it, I stowed in the nightstand drawer, placing the almost forgotten ring box next to it. Then I rapidly disrobed and joined her in the bed.

She was warm, and musky, and smelled like the sweet tang of spice cake. My hands and mouth explored every inch of her skin, and I felt her quiver as the desire built. When she couldn't stand another second, I reached up with one hand and captured both of hers, holding them above her head. The other was lightly resting in the hollow between her shoulder and throat, and I thought of that first fight, when I held her down almost exactly like this. She saw it in my eyes, heard it in my head, and her eyes darkened. My hand moved that small distance and gently circled her neck.

_I wanted you then too _and it was both of our thoughts, mingling together.

My eyes never leaving hers, careful not to squeeze her throat but not removing my hand, I moved slowly, wanting to see every nuance of her desire. She wiggled, and moaned, but I would give no quarter. Having the dim presence of mind to remove my hand from her neck, I started to move, and let go of her hands.

Hands freed but still pinned, she could still cause a great deal of damage and suddenly, I had the wildcat I called her beneath me. Rather than trying to contain her, I welcomed the savagery, and pulled back so she could reach more. She was a burning brand, mindless in its destruction and pleasure, and I let her rage around us. Pleasure and sweet pain mingled, and we battled our way to heaven.

Some time later, she was curled up next to me, head on my chest, idly tracing a scar that angled from a centimeter under the left collarbone to the breastbone.

"Vibroblade," I said in answer to her unspoken question. "The fellow who gave it to me was trying for the throat. We were out of kolto packs, so it had to be stitched."

"Ouch," she winced in sympathy.

She herself had no scars that I'd discovered, but that didn't surprise me. Her ability to heal herself made the probability of collecting one virtually nil. I loved the contrasts of her; warrior born but skin unmarked by combat, skillful and ferocious in battle but able to weep for those she killed. I couldn't remember the last time I'd cried. There had been times I wasn't sure I ever had.

She propped herself on her elbow and kissed me briefly, then turned her attention to the clan tattoo on my upper right arm. Traditionally, a Mandalorian warrior will have it reinked every ten years or so, to keep the colors sharp. The Ordo clan's was simpler than most, being primarily so dark a blue as to be nearly black, with traces of green and red. It was an ancient stylized version of a phoenix, wings outspread, a hint of fire sparking from its beak, talons and wingtips.

"What is that?" she asked curiously, letting a finger follow the lines of the tattoo.

"The badge of my clan," I answered, grinning.

She responded with a playful shove that nearly knocked me out of the bed. "I know _that_," she said tartly. "I meant, what sort of bird is it supposed to be?"

"A phoenix," I said, laughing at her mock scowl. "An ordo is a type of phoenix," I explained.

She looked startled, and I wondered why. But whatever had caused that look was buried now and I knew I wouldn't be able to retrieve it without digging deeper into her mind. We both were careful not to intrude that far without invitation, or great need, so I let it go.

"There are different types of phoenixes?" she asked with interest.

"According to traditional myth of my people," I said. "There are different breeds of hawks and falcons, after all. Why not phoenixes? Actually, I've heard somewhere that there is some evidence that the phoenix actually did exist millennia ago, and were probably the forefathers of modern falcons. Minus the mystical powers, of course."

"Really?" she said thoughtfully. I caught again that sense of something under the surface of her mind, but at the moment she was firmly blocking me.

"What's on your mind, cyar'ika?" I asked curiously.

"Just that the Force is more mysterious than even I thought," she answered cryptically. "I'll tell you about it sometime. Say," she said suspiciously, "am I expected to get a tattoo once we're married?"

"I don't expect it, no," I answered. "You automatically become a part of Clan Ordo when you marry me, of course. Gerda didn't have a tattoo from her clan; she wasn't a warrior. That being so, she didn't qualify for one in mine either."

"But you said she could fight; all of your people can. What's the difference between a warrior and a fighter to you?" Jennet's eyebrows drew together in confusion.

"Warriors are part of the army; it's as the word implies – someone who makes war. Fighters can use weapons and defend themselves or others, but aren't involved in formal battle."

"That's an odd way of putting it," she said.

"Not really. Serving time in the army was mandatory for men, optional for women. If you serve, you are considered a warrior. Those who followed the army, supporting their spouse or clan in general, often ended up having to fight, and would then be considered warriors." I cocked an eyebrow at her, but she continued to look confused.

"So if you served in the army, but never saw combat, you were just a fighter?" she asked slowly, trying to follow.

"If you served, you saw combat," I said with conviction. "That was a certainty. But the followers, mostly made up of women and children, were kept away from the front lines as much as possible. Now, mind, sometimes many of the women would come forward voluntarily and participate in a battle, or sometimes the camp would be overrun, and the followers defended. But unless you saw combat, you were just a fighter. You got your tattoo as soon as possible after your first battle."

"How old were you when you got yours?" Jennet asked.

"Thirteen," I answered, smiling as I remembered sitting still for hours as the Ordo clan historian had drawn the badge on my battle-weary arm after that first taste of war. It was one of the rare times I saw my father smile directly at me, and my ten year old brother Calder had been practically spitting with envy. Cartha had insisted on sitting at my feet the whole time, finally falling asleep against my boots. Mother actually had tears in her eyes from pride. I let Jennet see that day, and she smiled.

"You were so young," she said softly.

"Yeah," I said gruffly. "I've grown a bit since." That got an appreciative snort from Jennet. "They don't put the complete badge on when the warrior isn't fully grown; wouldn't do to have a sparrow on your arm when you're supposed to be sporting a phoenix later. The original was inked over when I turned twenty as part of my coming of age ceremony."

"Coming of age?"

"You can officially go to war at thirteen, and become a full adult member of the clan at eighteen, after you've proven yourself in battle. At twenty, you can marry and start your own branch of the clan. Both men and women have this ceremony whether they're a warrior or a fighter. It is extremely rare for a male _not _to become a warrior; only great physical or mental disability will prevent you from serving in the army. Women, it's about fifty-fifty if they'll choose to enlist."

"So," she said thoughtfully, "As your wife, and since I'm a warrior…well, do I qualify as one by your rules?" she raised an eyebrow at me inquiringly.

"I sincerely doubt anyone would have the balls to tell you you're not," I chuckled. "If you want to be letter of the law about it, though…have you served in an army, and seen combat during that time?"

"I never enlisted in an army, no. But I've been hired as a mercenary by one, and was part of their battles. I don't know if war was actually declared at the time, though." She shrugged. "It was the Republic army, and part of the Jedi Civil War, I guess. I wasn't asking too many questions at the time."

"Then by any Mandalorian definition, you qualify as a warrior. By my personal standards, I knew you were the minute I saw you fight in that cantina," I brushed a curl out of her eyes. "And I'm the Mandalore; I get to decide who's what, don't I?"

"I wouldn't ask for an exception anyway and you know it. But as tradition stands, I could have the tattoo after we're married, if I wanted it, yes?" She leaned over and kissed me, and for a moment I forgot her question.

"Yeah," I answered after we came up for air. "No one would question it in the slightest. You're not thinking about actually doing it, are you?" I shot a look at her, startled. When the conversation had started, she hadn't seemed keen on the idea.

"You would have a problem with it?" She asked with some surprise. "I thought you'd be proud I was even considering it."

"Are you?"

"I don't know. Maybe. I've never wanted a tattoo before, but this is very different than 'gee, it would be really cool to have a kath hound permanently stamped on my ass'. It has meaning, and tradition. But I'm not Mandalorian, and I don't know if it would offend your people. On the other hand, _you_ don't seem thrilled about it, so if you don't want me to, I won't." She seemed almost miffed at that.

"Will a tattoo even take on you?" I asked, honestly curious. I wasn't sure just exactly how her healing worked. I've felt it in action, sure, but how? Got me. I sure as hell couldn't do it. But I'd seen her heal Kex's hands, and neutralize poison; for all I knew her body would simply heal over any scarring and absorb the ink.

"Sure. Technically, tattooing is damage and scarring, true; but it forces the ink deep enough into your skin that no amount of healing can eradicate it. At least, I think so. Mom had a tattoo and her healing was better than mine," she added.

"I can't imagine that," I said sincerely. "Could she raise the dead?"

She glared at me. "Of course not."

"Joke, Wildcat. But your healing is pretty amazing. It's mind boggling that someone was even better," I tried to pull her down again, but she shrugged me off. She wasn't angry; she just wasn't done talking.

"You're getting me off track, and you didn't answer my question." She looked at me accusingly.

"What question didn't I answer? There were quite a few there," I observed.

"Would you have a problem with me wearing the Ordo clan tattoo?" She said patiently.

"Absolutely not," I said honestly.

Since she wouldn't come down so I could hold her, I started slowly rubbing her leg, tracing the line of her thigh under the thin sheet. She was doing a fine job of pretending she didn't notice, but I knew better.

"But….?"

"No but." My finger followed the path of her knee bone, pausing at a spot I knew made her twitch. She impatiently batted my hand away, and I grinned.

"There is, you just don't want to tell me," she persisted. "You're blocking."

I gave up; she'd nibble me to death if I didn't say it. Taking a deep breath I mumbled as quick as I could, "It would mark your skin."

She just looked at me, nonplussed. "Well, that's how a tattoo works, isn't it?" she said, bewildered.

"It's stupid," I said low, not looking at her.

"What's stupid?"

"How I feel. It's stupid." I sat up, shoving a couple of pillows behind me to lean against the headboard. I wished like hell I had something to occupy my hands besides her random body parts. I was starting to feel like an idiot.

She looked at me for a moment, completely at sea but struggling to understand. Finally, she said simply, "Why don't you tell me about it."

"Well…" I hedged.

"Okay, let me ask you something, and then you can decide if you want to tell me." Her voice was quiet.

"Go ahead," I shrugged.

"Is there something wrong with the idea of me wearing the Ordo clan tattoo, something that would offend the rest of the population?"

"No. In fact, they'd almost expect you to," I said, looking her in the eye.

"Then it's something about how you feel that's the problem," It wasn't a question. "Is it because you don't think I'm worthy?"

"Gods, no, cyar'ika, never that," I said in surprise, and was relieved to see her smile again. "Look, Wildcat…if you want to, I'd be proud to have you wear my badge. But I'm the last of my clan. As far as I can tell, not a single relative of mine survived Malachor V. We were an important family, but small. My sister died years ago, my parents died just before the war, my brother during it. My own family and my brother's were wiped out with the destruction of our home world. I had four uncles and an aunt and their families; none survived that I could find. Clan Ordo dies with me, if I have no more children. And it's the same everywhere; most everyone I've found are the last of their family, or close to. Bearing my badge would make me proud and you would bring great honor to my family. But you and I _are_ my clan, right now. So how much meaning would that tattoo have, anyway?"

"I see," Jennet said thoughtfully. "But I can tell it does have meaning for you, even so. And this doesn't explain what you said about it marking my skin."

I should have known she wouldn't be diverted. If I had been standing, I would have been dangerously close to shuffling my feet, and I looked away. I _hate_ feeling embarrassed.

"I _said_ it was stupid," I spoke in a low voice. "It's just…I've never seen anyone with as perfect skin as yours, and the tattoo would…mar it." I stared fixedly ahead. "Go ahead and laugh now."

Her silence was deafening, and I finally looked up. But she wasn't laughing; far from it. There was suspicious moisture in the corners of her eyes, and she was looking at me like I'd just fought off an entire army.

"Canderous Ordo, are you telling me that the only reason you balk at the thought of me having my arm tattooed with your clan badge is because you think my skin is beautiful?" she demanded.

I nodded.

"That," she said with quiet but fierce intensity, "is possibly the most romantic thing anyone has ever said to me. Don't you dare be embarrassed for it; I'll kick your ass."


	50. Chapter 50

**Jennet**

Canderous' reluctant admission was completely unexpected. But was the most endearing thing he'd ever said, with the possible exception of telling me he loved me. That I had known before he said it; this said even more about how he saw me. I didn't totally agree with his assessment; while I wasn't scarred anywhere, I've always thought I was too pale by half. My healing doesn't allow me to retain a burn as I ought to from the sun, so I've never known if I would tan after a sun burn faded.

His feelings were so seemingly out of character for him I was nearly speechless. Perversely though, I found myself wanting that tattoo; the idea of being marked because of him appealed greatly to me. And I worried a little that he had an idealized vision of who I was; perfect and unmarked, like my skin.

_No, cyar'ika, I know very well you're not perfect. Just perfect for me._

That did it; I started sniffling. He looked startled and a little annoyed, but he held me until it passed.

"Sorry," I said when I'd gotten a hold of myself. "I know you hate it when I cry for no good reason."

"No, I don't," he said quietly. "It's one of the contrasts I love most about you. You're a warrior and a healer. Your body is battle-toned, yet you haven't a single scar. You can kill with cool precision, but cry for the fallen. I can't, anymore. I let you cry for me."

Which, of course, made me cry all over again. "Damn it," I wailed. "Stop _saying_ things like that, I'm blubbering all over the sheets!"

This made no sense at all, and he laughed. "Go ahead and cry, Wildcat," he chuckled, and held me close as I did.

_You're the only one I've ever been able to do this to, you know, _his voice in my head was warm. _Mandalorian women don't cry much. Only with you I've ever said any of these things. Or wanted to._

_Don't stop on my account, _I answered, and eventually managed to quit sniveling.

"So," he said briskly after I'd stopped soaking his shoulder. "Do you want to be tattooed?"

I looked at him, trying to gauge what was more important. "Well," I said slowly, "yes, and no. Your badge is the phoenix, and that symbol is very apt, especially now. We're the beginning and you're the end of a great family, and you're leading your people out of the ruins. And I love the idea of being marked by you. But what you said…" I stopped before I could get all weepy again.

"What I said was true, yes…I don't like the idea of being the one to mar one of your most beautiful features. You have a beautiful body, cyar'ika. It would be a shame to mark it with a symbol of something as ugly as war."

"Who the fuck are you and what did you do with my Canderous?" I demanded, completely taken aback. "Since when have you thought of war as ugly?"

"I've never thought otherwise," he said simply. "We're not quite the savages people believe. War _is_ ugly; people die in lots of horrible bloody ways. Your list of friends and relatives get shorter over the years. It's destructive and brutal and filthy. Cities burn, and whole civilizations get ground into ash. We know what war is." He paused a moment, a slight frown on his face. "To us, the beauty is surviving it. Pitting all of ourselves, everything we are, against the horror, and becoming stronger because of it. At least, it was."

"Do all Mandalorians feel this way?" I asked curiously. I thought I had understood the Mandalorian mind pretty well after traveling with Dax and Jareth, listening to their stories. But talking to Canderous now, I was starting to realize I hadn't understood at all.

"Pretty much," Canderous shrugged. "Some don't; they really do just get off on the blood and chaos of battle. Those sort were useful to have on our side; they would do the things the rest of us weren't crazy enough to try. But yeah, we love war, not because of the death and destruction we caused, but because it's elemental – one force against another. The strongest wins. It didn't matter who you knew, or how rich you were. When you're in battle, you know who you really are. We provoked the Republic because they were the biggest kath hound of the pack, and we wanted to fight the best. When we lost, there was very little bitterness on our side against the Republic. We knew very well we'd brought it on ourselves. The bitterness came from knowing we _failed, _not that we were defeated. That it would be generations, if ever, when we would have a chance to prove ourselves again."

"But that's not what your goal is now, by reuniting what's left of your people, is it?" I asked.

"No, Wildcat, it isn't. A few hundred years from now, maybe some descendent of the Clans will get it in his head to bring back the glory of our past, and rile us all up for another try at conquering the galaxy. Who knows? All I want now is for my people to have a place and an identity, and maybe over time, help them to see that war doesn't have to be all there is. But for now, it's all we know, so I can keep them occupied by helping against the Sith. We're a practical people, cyar'ika; we'll adapt enough to survive."

"I have no doubt of that," I smiled. "You said once that Revan started the change in you, but what you've said, it seems you felt this way all along."

"Nope," Canderous said with a grim smile. "When I was growing up, I was taught to revere war as the true test of a man, and I believed every word. Still do, in fact."

"Or woman," I said pointedly, and he laughed. "And what do you mean, you still do?"

"I do believe that war brings out the true nature of a man. I just don't believe anymore that you have to provoke one to find out. _Losing_ a war, now…well, that will show a man what demons he really does have chasing him."

"I can see that," I said, nodding. "So you're basically saying that you haven't really changed your views on what you learn when you go to war, or how it should be waged. You're saying you don't believe that _starting_ a war just to learn who you are is a good enough reason anymore."

"Exactly. There's always wars, and battles to be fought. What I want now is when I do fight, it's for a reason beyond self-awareness. It hit me not long ago that the Mandoa could have survived, almost exactly as they were, if they had only one small mind shift: that they could have done the same thing fighting other people's wars, instead of provoking their own."

"Sort of universal mercenaries?" I said, diverted by the idea.

"Other races do; if we'd been wiser, we wouldn't be decimated now. But we had grander ideas than that; we thought to take the galaxy and didn't care overmuch that other people had the right to live in it too." He sat back with a wry smile. "It was a hard lesson, Wildcat, and to be fair, I'm pretty sure not many would have agreed with it anyway. Maybe being nearly wiped out was the only way for us to learn, and remove us as a threat."

"So what got you to start thinking differently?"

"Like I said before, Revan, I think. I was pretty bitter that it seemed like there was no honor left among the stray Mandalorians I'd come across, and was really starting to hate working for the Exchange. I threw in with Revan at first simply because I wanted out of there, and setting Davik up was my chance to break free without putting a price on my head. Survival, you see? I was still thinking in terms of my own ass," He made a derisive snort, and looked at me with a rueful twist of his mouth.

"I _thought_ I'd been part of the biggest bunch of bad asses of the galaxy, until the Jedi whipped our collective tails," he continued. "Watching Revan, discovering who she was and how far over to the dark side she'd gone was…incredible, I guess. When she found out, the rest of the crew was afraid she'd turn back. Me, I didn't care one way or another. She was the main reason the Mandoa had been stopped, and I knew I'd found a leader I could follow with honor. Then we got to the Star Forge. Dealing with Sith first hand showed me how wrong I was. We were brutal, Wildcat, but we never literally sucked the soul out of our enemy. The Sith did. It scared me more than anything else I'd ever seen." He shuddered at the memory.

"But I still meant what I had pledged; I'd be her man no matter what. Carth and I were with her when she confronted Bastila, and convinced her to come back, and use her Battle Meditation to help the Republic. Weird thing about being held by a Jedi stasis field; you can hear, see and feel everything, you just can't move," I nodded at that, I'd been there myself. He quirked his eyebrow at the acknowledgement.

"Revan killed Malak. But she tried to turn him back first, and that floored me. Bastila, I could understand, but I'd have just blown Malak away if I could. I didn't see that first hand, Carth and I had been left behind with Bastila, protecting her while she was meditating. I lost count of how many Sith we killed keeping her safe. My blaster was so hot it blistered my palms, even through my gauntlets. I had to chuck it, and scavenged another weapon off a dead Sith," he clenched his fist reflexively, as if feeling that long ago pain.

"When we got out of there, I was at first just glad to be alive. That was actually sort of a shock right there; it had been a long time since I really cared if I lived or died. What I hadn't counted on, and took me some time after that to figure out, was that I was also glad Revan had chosen the light. Because it meant I wouldn't become like the Sith" His eyes were focused on some distant point, but his hand reached out and clasped mine unconsciously. I squeezed it, leaning against his shoulder and letting him feel me. He glanced down, and smiled.

"I stayed with Revan a while after that; we all did. You have no idea, cyar'ika, how strange it was for me to be hailed as a Hero of the Republic. I'd much rather be facing down a Sith army unarmed than attend one more celebration party or diplomatic council. I was so far out of my element it was unreal." He frowned, and shook his head.

"Then one day she came by my apartment with a box," he continued, "and in it was the Helm of the Mandalore. She never told me where she found it. I expect it was in some forgotten storeroom in the Republic, taken as a prize of war. She just said that when she realized what it was, she knew who it belonged to. A week later, I started my search. I never saw her again. I about fell over when I saw the Ebon Hawk again six months ago. For the first few days, I kept expecting Revan to wander into the garage and ask for war stories. But I knew who Ladria was, and thought that this might be another chance to help make up for what my people had done, and to stop the Sith. So I tagged along. Then I met you, cyar'ika." He reached over and tucked a stray curl behind my ear.

"If Revan started me _thinking_ differently, you've made me want to _be_ different. When I saw you take on six mercs, I was stunned; you were the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. When you woke up and demanded to know just who the fuck I was, I knew I had to keep you around. When I found out you were Jedi, or near enough, after I quit being pissed about it, I figured I would never be good enough for you. I was thrown completely when I realized you were my Mate. But I was selfish enough that I was glad; it meant I could keep you. Unlike Revan, you've never turned to the dark side, and your compassion is so great you can cry for the people you have to kill. You showed me, more than anyone, that a true warrior isn't measured by how well he kills, but by how much he cares, and what he's willing to risk to protect others."

He took a breath, and let it out slowly. "That's the real reason, I think, that I don't want you to get that tattoo. Because it will make you more like me."

I was almost dizzy with the amount of talking he had done. I was willing to bet that was the most he'd said in a year. I was touched by how he saw me, and what he'd been through. But me being me, I said the first thought that popped into my head.

"Ti kar'ta, you are so full of shit."

His head snapped around and he glared at me.

"What did you say?"

"You heard me. This is what, the third time we're having this argument?"

"I wasn't aware until now that this _was_ an argument," he growled.

"It doesn't have to be if you'd admit for once that you _are_ a good man, and I had nothing to do with it," I said fiercely. "You went through a lot, and chose it long before I came along. You said it yourself: Revan's redemption made you believe you could change too. That's where it started, not with me."

He started at me a minute, scowling. "I'd like to think that, Wildcat. But I can't admit what I don't think is true. Even for you."

"What don't you think is true, exactly?" I asked. "That you are a good person, or that you can be redeemed?"

"That I am. I saw evil, real evil, face to face, and I knew what Revan was, once. I knew whatever petty evil I had been, it was nothing compared to that. In that moment, I saw what I could become, if she chose the dark side, and I followed. And in the moment, I didn't care which way it went. It wasn't until afterwards that I realized I was glad I hadn't. But I let her choose for me, don't you see? I didn't make the choice by myself."

"I don't see it that way, and neither should you. You _did_ follow the light, you _did_ choose to go with Ladria, and you _did _help save the galaxy – twice. Revan didn't go along with you and direct you in gathering your people; she handed you the Helm and let you decide what to do with it. She didn't say 'here you go, now make a nice Sith army for me, will you?' or 'I'll only give this to you if you promise not to be evil'. She gave it to you, and _you_ chose what to do. _You_. No one else." I was having a hard time keeping my voice below a shout, and wasn't bothering to mask any sarcasm, either.

"I'll give you a point there," he sounded like he was grinding his teeth. "But the fact is I still don't care a whole lot if everyone lives in peace and harmony and all that shit; I'd be bored stupid in a week. I like to fight, I'm good at it, and I don't much care how Joe Farmer lives his life. When it comes down to it, Wildcat, _I still like killing people._ And worse, I don't want to change that."

I stared at him for a moment, then very carefully said, "You think I don't know this?"

"I actually hoped you didn't," he answered, just as carefully. "But I should have known better."

"And you honestly think that I've never felt this way? That I have never taken satisfaction when I've killed? I _am_ a warrior, Canderous, and I like it. And there are plenty of people I've killed that I haven't shed a single tear for. I cried for Cressa, sure, but not because I was particularly sad she was dead. Personally, I don't think she would have changed at all. I cried for the lost opportunity for her, and because I had killed her in a blind rage I couldn't control. I threw up when I killed the Hutt because it was disgusting, and I was wounded and weakened, and the smell of the blood was making me sick. But I was glad he was dead, and that _I _killed him. Did you see me cry for that platoon of mercs trying to kill me in the cantina? Or any of the Sith I slaughtered on Telos, or the Leviathan? I often regret death I've caused, but I don't flinch from its necessity. And I sleep fine at night, even though I quit tallying my body count years ago. How are you any different?"

He looked at me with a mutinous glare, and I stared it down.

"I'm not some perfect idol, Canderous. I enjoy the thrill of battle, and sometimes take satisfaction in the kill, too. The only real difference between us that I see is I was raised to be a warrior, but was taught to use that to help others, those that can't help themselves. You were raised to revere war for its own sake, to become stronger. I never considered any other way to live; _you _saw that your way of life was destructive both to yourself and others, and chose to change." I saw his glare softening some, and pressed on.

"I haven't always done the best job of sticking to the ideals I was taught either; bounty hunting isn't exactly a clean business," I said ruefully. "I did the best I could there, but I wasn't always sure the target I was hunting deserved to be my prey. Mercenary work is the same way. I tried to only take jobs I thought were for a good cause, but often it's only a point of view. The one place I was sure that my fighting skills were simply that, skill, was in the battle ring. And that because most of the time, no one ended up dead."

We stared at each other for a while, neither of us speaking. I could feel his thoughts churning in his head, but so confused that I couldn't pick through easily. I felt him in mine as well, and slowly his tension eased.

"You may be right, cyar'ika," he said slowly. "Maybe I have been selling myself short."

"I know you have," I said quietly. "I just want you to see it, that's all."

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"What did you see, the first time you looked at my aura?" his face was very still.

"When I came to in the ally, the first thing I saw was your face," I said, thinking back. "I immediately scanned your aura, and I saw that you were struggling with your past, but you were on the side of light. There was definite indication that you had done some very bad things, but I remember that the blue-white was very bright."

He thought about that, and was silent for a time. Then he said softly, "That doesn't sound the same as it looked when you showed me my aura just before we got to Dxun."

"No," I admitted, "it isn't."

He mulled that over. "Well, Wildcat, it might be true you didn't make me a good man," he said finally. "But maybe you've made me believe it."

He reached out and I snuggled into his arms, kissing his shoulder, neck, cheek, and finally his mouth. His lips were warm, and exquisitely tender. I scooted closer until I was in his lap, the sheets tangled around us. After a sweet eternity, we broke apart, and I rested my head on his shoulder. He held me like that for a long time, just listening to each other's heartbeat.

"So," I said brightly, looking up into his intense blue gaze. "Does this mean you're okay with me getting that tattoo?"


	51. Chapter 51

The next day was spent almost entirely in a field outside the city proper. I had promised Canderous some time ago that I would try and teach him the technique of hyper-awareness while fighting; turned out most of the honor guard wanted to learn it too. I regretted Jarxel wasn't here for the lesson, but there was plenty of time to catch him up. We ran in to Mira and Dax as we were leaving the hotel, and they tagged along. Canderous and I were more than willing to excuse Dax for the day, but Mira said she was interested in learning as well, and I knew Dax found the idea intriguing. Just as we were about to head out, Bao Dur arrived with Danni and Jarxel.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Canderous demanded when he saw his XO.

"I can't take a day off once in a while?" Jarxel growled. "The camp is fine, Mandalore, the Elders are there and the men don't need a babysitter. I wanted to report that the battlefield for the final test is ready. And I wanted to prepare some things for the wedding. As primary witness for the groom, I have a few responsibilities," he said pointedly.

I turned to Bao Dur while Canderous and Jarxel bickered. I smiled at Danni, who actually shyly smiled back before ducking her head and leaning against the Iridonian.

Taking him aside, I asked low, "Did Atton tell you about the Phoenix?"

Bao Dur nodded, eyes shining. "Can't wait to see her. I thought I'd take today to check her out, see what I can do by way of improvements. And Danni missed her mother," he added softly, placing one hand on the little girl's head. She glowed a little at his touch, and I smiled to see it.

Megari showed up then, along with Visas, Ladria and Atton. Bao Dur had apparently commed ahead of his and Danni's arrival. Mother and daughter reunion made my throat thicken a little, and I saw Bao Dur's eyes brighten suspiciously. A short discussion later, he, Megari, Ladria, and Atton were headed to the docks. Visas decided to stay at the hotel.

"Sure you won't be lonely?" I asked curiously. "You're welcome to come along with us."

"I enjoy spending time with you and Canderous, of course," Visas said graciously. "And I enjoy Jarxel's company as well. Mandalorians are…refreshing," she said with a smile. "But I enjoy my own company from time to time, and I've missed it."

"I hear you there," I said sincerely. "Good for you."

Jarxel and Canderous had quit their squabbling, and the craggy XO had decided he could accomplish his errands easily enough later in the day, once he was told about our intentions.

Bidding Visas a good day, we trooped out into the street. Canderous led us to a public park he knew of that had fields commonly used for militia drills. It was quiet, and private, off the beaten path. It wasn't part of the main park, so we wouldn't have to deal with stray citizens wandering in; for a small fee we could rent the space all day. Once we got there, I told everyone to sit comfortably. There was a general shuffle of bodies, and everyone looked at me expectantly.

"The first step is learning how to listen," I told my little class. "Not just to voices or the noises all around you, but everything. Who here meditates?"

To my surprise, everyone raised their hand, not just Mira, as I had expected. I looked at Canderous and he grinned back.

"Jetti aren't the only ones who know it's an advantage for warriors to center themselves," he said smugly. "We call it keeping vigil, but it's the same thing."

"I don't know why I'm surprised," I said, smiling. "Your race is renowned for its fighting skills; without some sort of meditation, it's difficult to achieve that level of ability. This is great; it's going to make my job a lot easier."

I instructed them to meditate, and concentrate first on their own bodies, becoming intimately aware of every breath, to relax every muscle, feel every organ. The rush of blood being pumped through the heart and the path of their veins, bringing life to every cell. From there, I told them to expand that outward, feel each other's life force, the wind on their skin, the weight of the sunlight. I spoke softly, pitching my voice to penetrate but not distract. I opened my own senses and tuned in to each of them, feeling the various levels of awareness.

When I felt they were all sufficiently centered, I said quietly, "Now open your eyes."

There was a murmur of surprise from everyone but Mira and Canderous. I was proud of her especially, because she was strong in the Force and could achieve this state much easier than the others, but had not drawn on it to assist her. I motioned to Tagren to stand up. He did so slowly, as if afraid that movement would break the spell.

"Now," I said, "block me."

I whipped a fist toward Tagren's jaw. His hand came up barely in time to stop it. He was so surprised he simply started at my fist captured in his own big paw. Then he shook his head and let go.

"It's gone now," he said. "But your hand looked like it was moving in slow motion."

"Who else saw that?" I asked generally. I was pleased when it seemed that everyone had. "The real trick of this is to be able to shift instantly into this awareness, maintain it, and learn to move to accommodate. The meditation teaches you what state of mind is necessary. With practice, it will simply be there when you need it."

I had everyone pair off. Leading them in meditation again, I felt the awareness come to the proper level, and instructed each of them to spar.

I deliberately had not chosen Canderous as my sparring partner, and Mira had not chosen Dax. In my case, I knew our connection made it easy for him to achieve the state of mind needed, through me. I wanted him to learn it without my mental interference, and it was damned hard to block that when we're fighting. I thought it was a similar situation with Mira and Dax, if not as intense; I couldn't imagine either Mira or Dax being overly concerned about damage control from sparring with each other. So Canderous paired off with Kelborn, I took Jarxel, and Mira chose Tagren. Dax and Xarga squared off, leaving Zuka and Kex as the last pair.

I faced Jarxel, relaxed and ready. I gave him a nod, and suddenly swung at him. He blocked my fist easily, and quicker than I thought he would have without the sight. I followed with a spinning kick, and he got out of the way, making me shift to stop my own momentum and get back into position. Like Tagren had, though, he suddenly stopped and blinked.

"I've lost it," he said irritably.

"That's okay," I assured him. "You can't do this all at once. It takes time to be able to shift at will."

"Let's try it again," he grumbled, and closed his eyes for a while.

I took that time to look around and see how everyone else was doing. Mira and Tagren were both concentrating hard, although Mira clearly was having far less trouble maintaining her awareness. Canderous was doing well, but had stopped because Kelborn had lost his sight. Dax and Xarga both seemed to be losing their concentration and Kex and Zuka had degenerated into a free-for-all fistfight.

I called Canderous to help me break up the fight, and he and Jarxel took care of it by simply walking up behind the participants, snagging them by their elbows and dragging them apart.

"Hey, what was that for?" Kex demanded. "I was winning, dammit!"

"What the hell are you doing?" Canderous growled.

"Fighting, like the lass told us to," Kex said, clearly puzzled by our unreasonable behavior. Zuka nodded, grinning.

"This isn't about brawling, you fool," Canderous scowled. "It's about learning to fight like Jennet."

"Oh, I'm all for that," Kex said cheerfully.

"Then knock it off. You come with me. Zuka, take Kelborn," he ordered, and stalked off, Kex following.

Zuka shrugged, and squared up with Kelborn. The fight had broken everyone's concentration, so I directed meditation again, adding that when they lose their sight, signal their partner to stop the fight so they can try to regain their awareness. I shot fierce looks at both Zuka and Kex with these instructions. They nodded back, grinning.

Jarxel proved to be a good student, and was the second Mandalorian to be able to maintain awareness for longer than a few minutes, third of the group. Mira learned the fastest, Canderous next. Dax was right behind Jarxel, with, astonishingly, Kex not far behind him. Xarga, Zuka, Kelborn, and Tagren all were having various degrees of difficulty, but to my mind were far quicker studies than the average fighter would have been. I drilled everyone mercilessly for another hour before knocking off.

"That was a great first lesson," I said enthusiastically. "I want everyone to meditate – keep vigil, I mean," at this Canderous winked at me, "for a few minutes every morning and evening. Practice shifting your awareness at odd times of the day by looking at moving objects and trying to call up that feeling of slowed sight. When we're back at camp, we can have group sessions at least a few times a week. Remember, it takes time, and lots of practice. Don't be discouraged when it comes and goes; it's like learning any new weapon. You have to get the feel for it."

"How old were you, Lady, when you learned to do this?" Xarga asked with interest.

I looked at him, not sure what to say. But the truth is always the best way to go, especially with the Mandoa. "I honestly don't remember when I couldn't do it," I answered. "My father started teaching me fighting techniques before I was two. Not actual weapons combat until I was five, but things like this: hyper awareness, physical strength, flexibility, agility, and hand-to-eye coordination. You all know that fighting isn't just knowing how to use a weapon, pointing a blaster and taking down a target. Hand-to-hand combat is only as effective as the weapon – your body, your reasoning skills, and your instincts."

There was a loud murmur of agreement among everyone, with a shouted "You got that right, my Lady!" from Kelborn, followed by laughter. I grinned.

"All of you are in top shape, have already learned and work to maintain those skills," I said, and I saw everyone, even Mira, stand a little straighter with pride. Canderous sent me a lazy grin and casually leaned against a nearby tree. "You are all at a level of proficiency that needs no improvement to learn what I'm teaching here. You know I've felt Canderous' battle ecstasy, and he's explained that this is a state every Mandalorian experiences when fighting. This technique is very like that; when you master it I expect will heighten your battle ecstasy even more."

Jarxel stepped forward, a serious look on his weathered face.

"We've all experienced this awareness at some level today," he said in his deep growl of a voice. "Would you give us a demonstration of it? We saw you fight Cressa, but you said that during that, you didn't use this slow sight you're teaching much. It might help if we can see what it looks like when you're using it."

"Sure," I said. "Who wants to volunteer to spar with me?"

All the Mandalorians looked a Canderous, who shook his head. "No, men, I wouldn't be a good choice here," he rumbled. "It works different with Jennet and me; wouldn't be a real demonstration."

"I'd like to see you two face off," Kex called, a manic gleam in his eye, and the rest of the honor guard chuckled.

"Me too," Xarga put in, with Zuka nodding behind him.

"Everyone want to see that?" Canderous asked generally, and there was a roar of agreement. "All right, Wildcat, want to spar to shut these guys up?"

"Anytime," I said sweetly. "After I've given them the demo they asked for. So who's up for that?"

Jarxel stepped forward with a grin. "I'll take you on, Lady."

I nodded, grinning back. "Come on, then."

We squared off, circling each other carefully, much as I had done with Canderous in that first fight. He was slightly shorter than Canderous, but a bit broader, and by his movement seemed to be a more thoughtful fighter. He seemed to weigh his actions against probable outcome, and plan ahead more, like playing chess. This can be a huge advantage against a less experienced fighter; you can set them up into a position to take them down. I would love to see him in battle.

His first swing came very fast but my sight saw it long before it connected. I shifted my body sideways to avoid his fist and leaped back as his other one came in low, aimed at my gut. He followed with a spinning kick, which I dove over, tumbling in a somersault and jumping to my feet. I wasn't trying to hit back at all; the point of the demonstration was to show how I could avoid damage. He was on me faster than I had anticipated when I came back up, and I ducked to avoid a solid blow aimed at my head. We traded moves a few more times, and finally he threw up his hands with a grin and a whoop.

"You're fast, Lady," He said approvingly.

"So are you," I said.

"I'd love to face you in the battle ring some time," Jarxel said. "Win or lose, it would be a privilege."

"Thank you," I smiled. "Same here."

"Hate to break up the mutual admiration society," Canderous grumbled. "You ready to fight, Wildcat?"

"Absolutely," I stood on tiptoe to kiss him. "Get ready to have your ass handed to you."

"I was thinking forfeits," he gave me his best evil smile.

"That always gets you in trouble," I said, shaking a finger in mock admonition. "Look what happened last time."

"True," he growled back. "I asked for a kiss, and got a Mate. No end of trouble there."

Our little group was watching with interest, Mira smirking with amusement. Canderous bent to look me in the eye.

"If I win," he said clearly, "You won't take the Ordo tattoo when we're wed."

There was a collective gasp from the Mandalorians. My eyes narrowed.

"That," I snapped, "Is not fair, and you know it."

"Maybe not. But it's my forfeit. What say you?"

"I say I'm going to kick your ass," I said through my teeth. My glare could have melted armor.

"Go ahead and try, Wildcat," Canderous said with a steely smile.

We agreed on fists and feet only, me throwing in that he couldn't use stim. He scowled.

"You should know I wouldn't endanger you like that," he said in a voice like a vibroblade.

"I apologize then," I snapped back. "But I didn't think you'd wager the tattoo either."

He was blocking me, so I couldn't get a direct answer why he was doing this. I'd be damned before I'd ask him in front of the others.

Jarxel officiated, and we began. I didn't make the mistake of assuming he'd go easy on me for any reason; it wasn't in his nature in the first place, and there was an undercurrent I didn't understand going on here. So I put it out of my mind who I was fighting, and kept my focus on winning. He can take any damage I give him, and he knew the reverse was true.

As before, I stood there, waiting for him to come to me. I emptied my mind of everything but the task in front of me: taking this opponent down. He came at me fast, intending to barrel me over and get immediate advantage of size and mass. As he charged, I jumped smoothly straight up and he passed a scant three centimeters under my feet. I twisted in midair and landed facing him as he whipped around, fist swinging. I dropped low to avoid the crushing blow that would have been against my temple, striking hard straight into his gut with both fists. I heard a whoosh as some of the air was forced out of his lungs, but he'd tensed his muscles, anticipating that move, so it didn't do nearly the damage it should have. I deliberately dropped to the ground, rolling not away, but into his ankles. He jumped over my body, and I forced myself into a walkover, springing up to regroup.

He was right in front of me, and it almost cost me the fight. His foot was coming at me unbelievably fast. I just barely managed to duck and didn't have enough time to counter before he whirled away. Two swift blows aimed at my head and stomach, followed by a kick meant to knock me off my feet. He hadn't landed anything yet, but I was on pure defensive and getting cranky about it. I stepped closer, avoiding his leg, and managed a solid blow just under the jaw. He grunted, but didn't go down. I slipped out as his arms tried to encircle me to hold me down, springing into a back flip. One foot caught a glancing blow to his face as I did. Feet under me, I whirled into a spinning back kick, and he caught me as my back was to him. I recalled our first fight, and grinned, changing the direction of my kick straight up to smash into his face.

But as fast as I was, he was faster, and caught my ankle in one big hand mere millimeters before my foot hit his face. I was now in an extremely awkward position; one leg practically over my shoulder, the other on the ground. Fortunately, Canderous only has two hands, meaning only one had a grip on my left arm; I used my right elbow to great advantage, slamming it as hard as I could into his rib. He didn't break his grip, but I heard him suck in his breath with a hiss of pain. Not having the slightest idea how to get out of this predicament, I did the only thing I could think of: I shoved against the ground with my untrapped leg and wrenched it up, forcing him to take all my weight. Not that for him, it was that much of a burden, but the suddenness of bearing me by one arm and ankle caused him to drop both.

I fell with a thud literally on my ass but didn't take time to care; as soon as I hit, I rolled _back_. His legs were about shoulder width apart, but Canderous has _big_ shoulders. My feet landed right where it hurts men most, and I shoved hard as he involuntarily roared in pain, reaching down to try and snag me. But I had my hands firmly on the ground and between that and my feet I was able to spring away before he could catch me. I jumped up, whipping into another spinning kick, and caught him on the side of the head as he was still bent over. He went down, rolling to one side and jumping back up. To my astonishment, he was grinning, his blue eyes almost sparking at me. It was a ferocious grimace of a smile, and I found myself almost mesmerized as he charged so fast I almost didn't get out of the way. One arm caught me a glancing blow as he passed, and instead of whizzing right by me as I expected, he suddenly spun on one foot and kicked me hard. I felt a rib crack and fell.

This whole time, our sense of each other was gradually returning. He'd been blocking me to start with, and I had responded in kind. It made the fight both easier and harder. There was less distraction from each other's thoughts, but far less anticipation of moves. I still couldn't hear him, but I could feel him now, and knew he could feel me. Unlike when we're fighting together, our senses didn't merge, although I _could_ feel his battle ecstasy like a dim hum in the background. He could feel my Force energy flowing as well, but had no access to it. I had no time to sort out these sensations, and was just incorporating them into the fight as best I could, or ignoring them if I couldn't. Dimly, I made a mental note to analyze this new development later.

I also had no time to heal my broken rib, so I blocked the pain and rolled out of the way of Canderous' flailing feet. He aimed another at me as I sprang up, and I stopped it cold by catching his foot in both hands. I yanked hard, dropped to one knee, and brought his leg hard across my other. Stupid move; he was too big for it to break on my smaller leg. I ended up hurting my own and barely bothering him. But he _was_ down, and I gave the foot a twist as I dropped it. I heard bone crunch and knew I'd broken his ankle.

He didn't bellow, but he did, somehow, manage to get up. His mouth in a grim line of pain, he actually stood on both feet. Instead of calling the fight as I had expected, he suddenly sprang forward using his good leg, and shot out his bad leg. He probably wouldn't have managed to hit me if I hadn't been stupidly off guard, expecting him to cry uncle. I felt not just my own pain, but the agony of his as his broken ankle bones ground together while his boot connected with my own ankle. I felt the snap of bone and we both were down.

We lay on the grass a minute, breathing hard and counting bruises. He was just far enough away that I couldn't reach him with either fist or foot, and I didn't much want to anyway. He might have been able to hit me, but it looked like that blow to the nuts had caught up, and he wasn't in any real shape to do more damage.

"You give up, Wildcat?" he panted at me, barely containing his groan of pain.

"Hell no," I panted back.

"Good," he said. "Neither do I."

"Call it a draw?" we said together, and laughed. Carefully.

"Heal us, Wildcat," Canderous said. "This fucking hurts."


	52. Chapter 52

**Canderous**

While Jennet patched us up, the honor guard was loud and enthusiastic about the match. They accepted without question calling it a draw; the only way either of us should have continued was if Jennet had healed us, or other medical attention. Considering the overall stubbornness of both of us, however, what we might have done was found a way to pummel each other despite broken ankles, ribs and other tender parts. I was fairly certain she hadn't deliberately set out to unman me, and I had no clue how I managed to keep fighting after that blow, beyond sheer stubborn desire to see it through. We hadn't actually set a rule about healing, it was more unspoken agreement. The men's estimation of Jennet had gone up considerably, and me as well. I knew none of them were certain they could take her in a fair fight; the fact I had fought her to a draw was impressive in their books.

We had not communicated even mentally on the walk back to the hotel. I could tell Jennet was puzzled and rather angry I'd forced the tattoo issue publicly, and I wasn't about to explain it until we had privacy. Sure, our mental communication gets across things much more directly and quickly than verbal, but it does take at least a little processing, and I wanted to have no interruptions when we discussed it. She seemed to understand at least that much, and let it be for now.

Jarxel headed out to do his errands, taking Kelborn and Tagren along. Before Dax could ask, I suggested to him and Mira that they should go get some supper, and not to bother about coming back tonight; we wouldn't be going anywhere that a full honor guard would be needed. Kex, Zuka and Xarga started a game of cards, turning on the holoscreen for background noise. Jennet and I, laughing and joking with the three men as they swore and crowed over their card game, prepared some dinner for everyone, taking ours into our room, where there was a small two-person table.

I expected Jennet to grill me the instant we were alone, but she seemed in no hurry to talk. She wasn't blocking me, but we had gotten so adept at our mental communication that we could filter, so to speak, what we wanted the other to hear. Emotion, stress, and other factors can make us wide open to each other, but if we don't want the other to hear certain things, say, like the house I was planning on building, we'd learned how to keep it under the surface. So I was getting thoughts, but they were almost deliberately random. She wasn't choosing to examine mine closely either. I wasn't entirely certain if it was because she was angry, or hurt. Or both. I probed a little mentally, but she kept me firmly at bay and I didn't want to risk her blocking me entirely.

So we ate dinner, talking about absolutely nothing and I was getting twitchy, waiting for the explosion that didn't come. After we'd finished, she took the dishes back to the kitchen, and returned to find me on the balcony.

"So," Jennet said casually, leaning against the rail. "You want to tell me why you called the tattoo as forfeit?"

"I've wanted to for the last hour, actually," I answered just as casually. "You didn't seem to be in a mood to hear it though."

"I didn't want to yell at you and end up looking like an idiot if it was a good reason," she admitted a little ruefully. "And if it's a bad reason, I'd rather hear it when I'm not spitting mad."

"_Are_ you spitting mad?" I asked rhetorically. I could tell she wasn't. She was regaining her usual good humor and had come to the conclusion that I had had my reasons. This much I could read off her.

"Nope. Confused, though."

"Well, it's like this, Wildcat. I thought about what you'd said last night, and realized that if me wanting to be more like you is okay, and someone like you loves me, then you wanting to be a little more like me isn't such a bad thing."

She stared at me. "Well, it's already working."

"What?" I asked, puzzled.

"You really are becoming like me. I'm sure that was Galactic Basic, because it sure as hell didn't sound like Mandalorian. I assume that convoluted observation was supposed to make sense? Not even I can mangle a point that bad." Jennet said with a laugh.

I thought about what I'd said and decided I _really _needed some time with just me and the boys, and soon. I love Jennet with all my heart, but if I was going to start talking like her, I might as well hand the Helm over to Kex and be done with it.

She caught that, and gave me a friendly elbow to the ribs. "I'm pretty sure you only do it when we're alone, so you're safe," she said with a chuckle. "But do explain yourself, please. I think I deciphered your strange alien logic, but why make the tattoo a public challenge?"

"Let me back up here," I said. "I meant that since I met you, I've wanted to be more the sort of man that you deserve to be with. You've pretty much convinced me that I am, I guess…but we don't have to debate that now," I cut off the exasperated comment I already heard in her head. "Anyway, today it hit me that if you love me, which you've been assuring me regularly for some time now…"

"I do," Jennet interrupted, smiling.

"…and you're as good a person as I think you are, your own opinion of yourself notwithstanding," I gave her a glare as she started to interrupt again, "then maybe I'm not such a bad fellow. And if that's true, you having that tattoo will only be what it's supposed to be: the symbol of a warrior of my clan. Which, when we're married, you would be anyway." I lifted an eyebrow at her, and she nodded.

"I follow so far," she agreed. "What I don't get is why make it a challenge in front of witnesses, _and_ make your forfeit that I _don't_ get the tattoo, if you've decided it's just dandy for me to have it?"

"Because of three reasons, one of which might make you mad." She started at that, and opened her mouth to say something. I waved it off. "We'll get to that one in a minute. Let me explain to most important reason. To my people, the warrior tattoo is an almost sacred rite of passage. Now, every one of our honor guard, Jarxel, and I'm willing to bet pretty much the entire camp would be proud for you to be marked as a Mandalorian warrior. Not one would question you choosing to get it. But I felt that them seeing you fight for that right, from me, would go a long way toward them really knowing you _wanted _it, and understood its significance, not just getting because it seemed like the right thing to do."

She looked at me, understanding dawning. "That makes sense. But wouldn't you making that bet look like you disapproved of me getting the tattoo?"

"No. The men assumed just what I knew they would: I was threatening to withhold from you an honor you wanted, to provoke you into fighting your best."

"Okay, it makes sense now. What were the other two reasons?"

"The second reason was I wanted _you_ to realize what it was you wanted. You hadn't completely made up your mind about it and I knew it. By forcing the issue, you made a choice. You didn't break my ankle because you _didn't_ want that tattoo." I said smugly.

"Okay, I'll give you that. But why didn't you just _tell_ me, dammit? Why spring it on me out of the blue like that? And how did you even know I wasn't just pissed at you for putting me on the spot, and fought to beat you regardless of the forfeit?"

"Because you didn't make a counter forfeit," I said, answering her second question first. "If you didn't want the tattoo, you'd have made _your_ forfeit something else. That way, if I won, you didn't get it, but the men would still assume you _had_ wanted it. If you won, you could choose it or not, and it wouldn't be tied to the bet. But the way you answered my challenge, it was clear you were fighting for the right to have it," I paused as she slowly started to nod her head in agreement.

"I think you're giving me credit for logic skills I wasn't necessarily using," Jennet said with a frown. "Your reasoning makes sense, but I sure as hell wasn't thinking it through that clearly."

"I didn't think you were; I was looking for your gut reaction. You're very good, Wildcat, at coming to a quick instinctive conclusion based on the evidence at hand." I smiled at her as she glowed from my praise. "As to why I didn't say anything? Well, that's the part that might piss you off. I wanted to see your honest reaction to throwing it out there, and how you fought me after it. It worked; you fought like the wildcat I call you, and gave no quarter. I figured when you kicked me in the balls that earning that that tattoo wasn't a whim."

She stared at me a moment. "You really are a ruthless son of a bitch," she said conversationally.

"Yes," I answered with my best don't-fuck-with-me smile.

"But," she said softly, "It was a draw."

"The fight was," I agreed.

"You didn't throw the fight, did you, to leave me an out if I changed my mind?" Jennet looked at me with narrowed eyes.

"I'm ruthless, Wildcat, not suicidal," I said, chuckling. "Do you honestly think I'm stupid enough to try and do that, knowing how you'd react when you figured it out?"

"No," she said, looking away. "Sorry. So," she said, looking at me with a bright smile, "how long after we're married can I get it done?"

"You can do it right away if you want. But it takes hours, so you might want to wait until at least the day after," I said. "And I might have some plans of keeping you incarcerated with no access to clothing for a while after the ceremony. Maybe a week or so later would be better," I added with a leer.

She laughed, and kissed me. I gave her my full attention, and she returned the favor.

"I can wait," she said breathlessly when we came up for air. "I've spent twenty five years _not_ being a Mandalorian warrior; I can spend a few more days waiting to become one."

I kissed her again, and eventually we made our way to bed. A nameless time later, we were curled together, not sleepy but content to simply breathe. I idly toyed with one of her curls as she traced the phoenix on my arm again.

"It is beautiful work," she said admiringly.

I twisted my arm a bit to look down at the tattoo. I hadn't really _looked_ at it in a long time, and was fairly impressed all over again by the detail and artistry. The hint of fire from beak, wingtips, and talons looked very much like a banked ember about to burst into flame. I made a mental note to see if anyone in camp could do tattoos. If not, I'd have to locate an artisan that could draw Jennet's.

"I've had it so long I don't really look at it anymore," I said. "But yeah, the Ordo historian was one of the better tattoo artists. I ought to have it touched up when you get yours done; it's been five years since the last time. A bit early to do that, but it would be nice to have it sharp to match your shiny new one."

She looked up with quick understanding. "You had it renewed when you started your search."

"Yeah." I nodded. "Before that, I hadn't had it done since a year before Malachor V."

She was silent for a time. When she spoke, it was a different subject entirely. "Funny how things end up, isn't it?" she asked softly. "I had pretty much resigned myself that I would spend most of my life alone, and after Stefan I wasn't about to risk otherwise again. My mother once gave me advice on finding the right man," she tilted her head up at me, eyes soft.

"What was that, Wildcat?" I asked curiously.

"She told me that I shouldn't worry what anyone else thought of my choice, if he loves me as I am, and doesn't try to change me. I asked her how I could tell he loved me, and she said when it was obvious my welfare was more important than his own. So you qualify, on both counts," she said, a hint of mischief in her smile.

"You're right, though," I said, grinning. "It is funny how things work out. I walked into that cantina looking for a whore, and found a wife."

"You what?" She looked startled, and I grinned wider.

"I guess I've never told you that, have I?" I said, chuckling.

"It never occurred to me to ask what you were doing there. It was a bar fer shit's sake; most people are there to drink. You're telling me you were there looking to get _laid_?" She was trying to look disapproving, but I saw her mouth twitch with suppressed laughter.

"Yep. We had a few days before we were going to head to Telos, and I hadn't had a woman in about a year. So I got some names of local haunts, and chose one at random. Saw you as soon as I was seated, too. I wanted to beat the bartender for letting a kid in that kind of place; I understand it's one of the worst. For Nar Shadaa, that's saying something." I was matter-of-fact, but my eyes crinkled with amusement.

"It had been a year?" Trust Jennet to pick out that particular fact.

"A bit more, actually," I shrugged. "I live in a camp with a hundred men, Wildcat, and until now, no women. I don't allow slavery, and not many outlander women would voluntarily choose to stay. Not to mention the endless trouble it would cause to have only a few women in a camp with that many men. I encourage regular furloughs, and when they're on scout missions, I don't question what they're up to as long as they do their jobs. I just don't allow women in camp for strictly sexual purposes."

"We've been here a couple of weeks now and I haven't had any trouble. Nor has Mira, Ladria, Visas, _or_ Megari." She pointed out. "I'd say the men are very well behaved."

"They are, cyar'ika. But you five are a huge difference from women brought in specifically for sex. You are my Mate; no one would touch you. Ladria, Visas, and Mira are all warriors in their own right, and jetti to boot; no one is stupid enough to make a play uninvited with them. Most important, they are guests of the Mandalore. Same with Megari. It's entirely different."

"I suppose it is," Jennet said slowly. She eyed me, grinning. "So what made you decide that particular day that it was time to get laid?"

"I honestly thought there was a good chance we all were going to die in a few days," I admitted. "I'd been to the Star Forge, Wildcat, and knew how ruthless and evil the Sith really are. No one else on the crew had seen what I had, with the possible exception of Ladria, who wasn't telling. Whatever was coming, I was pretty sure it was the final confrontation, at least for now. If I didn't survive it, I at least wanted to go out well fed, well bedded, and fighting. In that order," I added, grinning.

"So you'd eaten before you got there?" Jennet was quick to tease.

"Seedy cantinas aren't usually noted for the quality of their food," I shot back, laughing. "I'd had dinner earlier."

We laughed together, and I pulled her over until she was laying across my lap.

"And then," I growled in her ear, "I saw you being harassed by the mercs, they made the grave error of trying to kill you, and my entire world changed. I'd never seen anything like it, and I had to know who you were. So now I have a Mate, and more women in my camp, and a possible deal with the Republic that will reunite the remnants of my people. Any more, Wildcat, I'll be as domesticated as a gizka."

"I sincerely doubt you'll ever be domesticated," Jennet purred. "Thank the Gods."

"Maybe not," I answered, resting my chin on the top of her head. "Give me fifty or sixty years."

"Nope," Jennet said positively. "Then you'll be just like Elder Gregor, fierce and growly and ready to whip the youngsters into showing some respect."

"Growly, eh?" I laughed. "I do admire your mangling of perfectly good Basic. Makes me wonder what you'll say next."

She mock-scowled at me, and I kissed her senseless. At the moment, it didn't take much.


	53. Chapter 53

**Jennet**

We all returned to Dxun the next afternoon, split between the two shuttles. I had managed to get to the docks and check on the Phoenix that morning. I wasn't surprised when I found Bao Dur already there, tinkering up until the last minute. Apparently, he had opted to sleep on board, rather than taking a room at the hotel, and Megari and Danni as well.

"I apologize for taking advantage of the hospitality of your ship without asking," Megari said quietly. "I lost track of time helping Bao Dur, and I didn't want to make him walk Danni and me back. It was rather late."

"No, no," I said, waving off her apology. "I should be thanking you. The Phoenix looks marvelous."

"Megari here is a great mechanic," Bao Dur said with quiet pride. Megari's violet eyes shone at the praise. "She knows her way around an engine. The modifications I wanted to do are done and she's ready to fly. I must say this is a wonderful ship, one of the best I've ever worked on."

"That's high praise," I said, smiling. "I'm glad to hear it; I was having that buyer's remorse of being afraid I'd paid too much or she wasn't as good as I'd thought."

"Not to be rude, but how much did you pay?" Bao Dur asked curiously.

"Twenty five thousand," I said anxiously. "Atton seemed to think it was a good price, and he was over the moon about it being a Falcon. Was I suckered?"

Bao Dur stared at me, his mouth slightly open. "Twenty-five? Really? Do you have any idea how much these beauties go for new? Triple that, easy. And the Phoenix is no more than five years old."

"Oh," I said brightly. "Well I guess I did get a bargain, then. I just hope Canderous likes it."

"He'd be a bigger idiot than usual if he doesn't," the Iridonian said with a smile.

"I thought you liked him," I gave the big Zabrak a friendly elbow to the gut.

"I do," he answered, grabbing his stomach in mock pain. "Which is why I can say things like that."

"Seriously, though, I can't thank you enough for all your help in getting the Phoenix in top shape, _and_ getting the energy dampeners up and running. You too, Megari," I said, touching her arm in gratitude. "You guys are the best. I'm sure I don't deserve friends like you."

"It was my pleasure," Megari said sincerely, and smiled.

"It's nothing," Bao Dur said modestly. "I would have paid _you_ to get my hands on a Falcon. But you're welcome, all the same. Just let me be there when Canderous checks out his new ship," he added.

"You got it," I promised. "I owe you a spice cake and a keg of ale, too," I added with a grin.

"I didn't forget," the Zabrak laughed.

"And Megari, you will be in the wedding, right?" I asked. "And Danni?"

"I'd be honored, but you hardly know me," she protested. "Wouldn't that be, well…presumptuous?"

"Nonsense," I waved off her concern. "We're just good friends that have only just met. It's _my_ wedding, and I want you in it, so there!" I stuck my lip out and stomped my foot in mock tantrum.

She laughed, as I had intended, and agreed gracefully to join the wedding party.

The four of us made our way to the shuttles to meet the others. Once back on Dxun, we were dragged enthusiastically to a newly cleared out area, meant for the final test. I was amazed at how much work had been done in so short of time. The barracks, bathhouse, and assorted workshops had been broken down and relocated to allow an enormous field to be leveled and incorporated into the camp. Shields were in place to prevent the local wildlife from rampaging through. Apparently, every hand available had worked on this, with Bao Dur directing where to set up the energy dampeners and shields.

I commented on the efficiency of the men, and Canderous shrugged. "It's what we do, Wildcat," he said, but I saw the glimmer of pride in his eyes. "We're trained to break down and set up camp as quickly as possible. Now leveling that field…that was impressive. How did you get that done so quickly?" he turned to Bao Dur, who smiled modestly.

"I modified one of your war droids to be used for tree removal and used the logs to shore up the boundaries of the camp. Primitive, but effective for all that. Then we simply dug a trench around the whole field to prevent any fire from spreading, and lasered the remaining plant life to ash. The war droid was useful after that for stomping everything more or less level."

"Ingenious," Canderous said sincerely. "I'm impressed. You did this in three days?"

"Ah, it was fun. Having a hundred or so strong hands to direct around made it easy. Your men are hard workers, and they wanted to do you proud," Bao Dur said, a twinkle in his eye. "And Danni loved tromping around with me in the war droid. Actually, I was only there for the first day; I left instructions with the Elders and your men on the finishing up. I had modified the droid the day before you guys left for Onderon."

"Thank you," I said, hauling on his arm so I could kiss his cheek. He had to bend almost double for me to reach.

"It was nothing," Bao Dur said. "I get to participate in the battle, yes?"

"I don't see why not," Canderous said. "Anyone that wants to can, I'm sure. I do have a little concern, though. The battle ecstasy isn't usually used _against_ each other, and we don't have enough warriors to even up the sides without using mostly Mandalorians. I hadn't really thought about that until now."

"Oh, I don't think that's going to be a problem," Bao Dur said cryptically.

"What do you mean?" Canderous asked suspiciously.

"Not for me to say," the Iridonian shrugged. "Talk to the General."

We ran Ladria to ground in the mess hall, where she was chatting with Jarxel, Atton, and Visas.

Canderous strode up purposefully and without preamble demanded, "What's Bao Dur talking about, we won't have a problem with the battle? I mentioned that I was concerned about testing the battle ecstasy against my own men, and he said to ask you about it."

Ladria blinked at him, then smiled. "I apologize if I overstepped myself," she said in her best diplomatic voice. "It had occurred to me that if your battle ecstasy was used against your men, it might invalidate the test, if things go wrong. I thought that I had a solution to the problem, and I didn't want to ask until I was sure it could be done. Then I didn't say anything because I thought it would be a pleasant surprise. I did ask Jarxel, and the Elders, however, and they agreed it was a good idea."

"Agreed _what_ was a good idea?" Canderous asked exasperatedly.

"I called in a favor from an old friend of yours," Ladria said serenely. She looked over his shoulder at the mess hall door. "Oh good, here he is now."

We turned as one to see the newcomer walk in, escorted by Kelborn and Xarga. He was about Canderous' age, stood about Atton's height and had a pleasant, handsome face. Dark brown hair was sprinkled lightly with gray, with attractive silver wings at his temples. He spotted Canderous and gave a sharp salute.

"Admiral Onasi of the Republic ship Eternity requesting permission to enter camp, General Ordo," he said in a clear voice.

Canderous seemed at a loss for a moment. I felt him mentally shake off his surprise, and he returned the salute. "Permission granted, Admiral. Someone want to tell me what the fuck is going on?"

Carth Onasi strode forward and offered his hand "Good to see you, Canderous."

"Good to see you too, Carth," he answered, clasping his wrist firmly.

I could feel the undercurrent between them, and hoped that this didn't end up a pissing contest. Then Carth turned to me, hand outstretched. I took it in the same warrior's grip Canderous had used, and gave him my most brilliant smile.

"And you're Jennet," Carth said, smiling warmly. "I'm glad to finally meet you. Ladria has said a lot of nice things about you."

"Canderous has told me a lot about you, too," I answered diplomatically. He had a nice face, with hazel eyes that were kind and sharply intelligent. He winked at my careful phrasing.

"I'm sure he has."

Ladria and the rest of our friends stood to greet the Admiral. Jarxel gave him a measuring look, but seemed friendly enough. Bao Dur arrived with Megari and Danni in tow as the introductions went around, and took their turn in the welcoming. When Carth came to Atton, he smiled widely.

"So you're the current pilot of the Ebon Hawk," he observed. "How is she?"

"Still beautiful, Admiral," Atton grinned. "Flies like a dream."

"She's a good girl," Carth said approvingly. "Got us out of some tight spots. And please, it's Carth. Admiral makes me feel old."

Danni, who had been silent as always and leaning against her mother, suddenly toddled forward and stood in front of Carth. Megari looked startled, and took a step forward, but Bao Dur gently took her arm and shook his head. She frowned slightly, but stayed put. Carth didn't see this exchange as his back was to them. He went down on one knee so he could look the little girl in the eye.

"And who are you, sweetheart?" he asked gently, putting out a hand for her to take. To my shock, she did.

"Danni," the tot said clearly. "I like you."

"Well," the Admiral said with a smile, "I like you too."

I looked over at Megari, who was standing frozen, silent tears running down her face. Bao Dur put an arm around her, and she smiled, groping for something to wipe her eyes. The Zabrak snagged a napkin off the table and handed it to her. Danni, apparently having exhausted her vocabulary for the moment, touched Carth's face with one small hand before running back to her mother. Megari picked up her up, burying her face in her daughter's soft brown curls. Carth stood and caught the end of that, a puzzled smile on his face.

"So, Onasi, what brings you to Dxun?" Canderous broke in to the scene, and I could hear mentally that he was attempting to give Megari a moment to compose herself. Whoever thought he had no tact had never been witness to his thoughts.

"Imagine my surprise when two hours after I last talked to you, I got another comm from General Windbreak here," Carth said easily.

"Please," Ladria said firmly. "I'm not a general anymore. It's Ladria, or if you must use a title, Master Ladria."

"All right," Carth said with a nod. "Ladria. She told me a bit about the Mate trials you and Jennet were going though, and wondered if some of my men would be interested in a drill with the Mandalorians. It was amazing how many Republic soldiers wanted to participate," he added. "I have two hundred men in orbit on a transport vessel belonging to my ship. I wasn't sure if you had the room to land here, and Onderon requires a little more time to accommodate that many at their outpost."

"And no one told me this why…?" Canderous growled, glaring at Ladria.

She opened her mouth to answer, but Carth interrupted.

"Don't blame Ladria, Canderous," he said with a wicked grin. "I asked her to let me surprise you. I couldn't resist, after she had spoken so highly of Jennet. It was a condition of using my troops."

The two men eyed each other for a moment, and I held my breath. Then Canderous gave a bark of laughter.

"I accept your offer of help," he said with a genuine smile. "You win this round, Carth. I'm impressed. Is Mission with you?"

"I'm afraid not," Carth said regretfully. "She's currently on Kashyyk visiting Zaalbar. But she wants to come to the wedding. She's looking forward to seeing you again, and meeting Jennet. Zaalbar sends his regards, but can't leave his tribe right now."

"I understand. Send him my best," Canderous said. "How's Dustil?"

"Finishing up at the Academy," Carth said, and I saw his eyes shine. "He's going to make a fine officer."

"He had a good example," Canderous said gruffly. "It's good when a son makes his father proud. I didn't."

Carth raised an eyebrow. "You're kidding."

"Hell no, I wanted to be a musician," Canderous said, frowning. "He beat that out of me soon enough."

There was a short shocked silence as Carth seemed to struggle as to what to say. I bit my lip hard, schooling my face into innocent unawareness. Then the admiral laughed uproariously.

"That was good," he said, shaking his head. "I deserved that."

"Maybe," Canderous said, grinning. "Call it even, now."


	54. Chapter 54

Jarxel stepped forward. "Excuse me, Mandalore," he said officiously. "Perhaps the Admiral could take a moment to work out some logistics? I'm sure his men don't want to be in orbit any longer than they have to be."

"Of course," Canderous said, nodding. "Carth, have a seat. I think a war council is in order."

"Absolutely," Carth agreed, and we all seated ourselves around the high table. Carth and Canderous sat facing each other in the middle, Jarxel on Canderous' left, me on his right. Ladria sat on Carth's left, with Bao Dur next to her. Dax and Kelborn took up position behind Canderous and me. Xarga, with a word from Jarxel, trotted off to fetch the Elders, and Kex went to find Lorna and ask for refreshments. The rest of the honor guard were standing guard at the door of the mess hall. The remaining Ebon Hawk crew seemed to be leaving, but paused at a word from Canderous.

"No, stay," he said with a gesture. "You'll be a part of this too, unless you'd rather not."

"Hell yes, I do," Mira said, grinning. With murmurs of agreement, everyone found a seat, with the exception of Megari, who excused herself, saying Danni needed a nap. I looked down the table at our assembled friends and Disciple caught my eye.

"Where have you been?" I asked him curiously. "I haven't seen you for days."

"For the last three, I've been assisting the camp with the battlefield project. It's absolutely amazing how efficient the Mandoa are," he enthused. "Before that, I've been helping the Elders assemble a genetic history on Canderous, and combing the Republic records for yours. Thank you for the loan of your parent's documents, they were invaluable."

"Of course," I waved off the thanks. "How is it going?"

"Both family histories are ready," Disciple said, eyes glowing with the accomplishment. "It's fascinating really. Did you know you're a cousin of the Queen of Onderon? And on your father's side, there are ties to the royal family of Telos, now defunct, of course. And Canderous is related to at least seven prior Mandalore."

"About Onderon, yes, but I have no contact with that branch. Interesting about Telos," I said politely. I actually didn't care much, but wasn't about to crush his feelings, he was so proud to have collected the data. "And it doesn't surprise me about Canderous' family." I nudged my intended teasingly. "See, it's genetic."

Canderous gave me a twist of the mouth I supposed was to pass as a smile.

"You're from Telos?" Carth asked me, leaning forward with interest. "That's my home world."

"My father was," I said with a friendly smile. "I've never lived there, myself. Visited a few times, though. My mother was from Onderon, but both my parents were taken to the conclave at Dantooine as children."

"Yes, Ladria mentioned they were both former Jedi. I'd love to hear your history some time," Carth said.

"It hasn't been all that interesting until lately," I laughed. "But sure, if you don't mind being bored to death for a few hours."

Lorna and a few of the other women came to the table, bearing huge trays of food and drink, passing them around and chatting familiarly with everyone. Admonishing me to eat up, she left with a wink and a smile. The Elders entered the hall just as everyone started serving themselves, and sat at the end of the table. Introductions were made, and the meeting came to order.

"First and most important is landing the admiral's vessel, and housing his men," Canderous said pointed out.

Jarxel cleared his throat. "I took the liberty of constructing two temporary barracks near the bathhouse," he said in his grumbly voice. "Ladria informed me of the need to accommodate a couple of hundred guests. Admiral Onasi, we have a private guest room for you in the regular barracks next to where your men will be housed."

"Thank you," Carth said with a nod. "Is there anywhere we can land the transport, or will we need to land on Onderon and shuttle over?"

"The clearing where the Ebon Hawk is parked is large enough to accommodate your vessel, if Ladria consents to having her ship moved to the hangar here," Jarxel said. "The shuttles can be parked just outside the main gates for the duration of your stay. Mandalore, are we expecting any more guests for the wedding? If so, I may need to set up a shuttle detail to fly them from Onderon. With the Admiral's ship here, we have no more room unless we clear more space out of the jungle."

"I don't mean to make things difficult," Carth said with concern. "We can park on Onderon, if need be."

"No," Canderous interjected. "I would much rather have your ship here, rather than deal with the logistics of shuttling two hundred men. Your help is appreciated, and I am not willing to put you or your men through any more inconvenience than is necessary. As to more guests," he turned to Jarxel, "I only know of Mission Vao and Master Stefan, and he is not a certainty."

"Um," Carth looked slightly uncomfortable, "I might have mentioned to Jolee, Ju'hani, and Bastila that you were getting married."

Canderous just looked at him, resigned. "I knew you knew where they were. Are they coming?"

"Jolee said he wouldn't miss it. Ju'hani is on assignment right now, and sends her congratulations. Bastila…" Carth looked distinctly uneasy. "Well, she won't be there."

Canderous gave a short bark of a laugh. "Doesn't surprise me," he said, amused. "She always thought I was a barbarian."

"Not as much as you think," Carth said, smiling now that he was sure Canderous wasn't offended. "But she did send the message that she admires your wife to be."

"She's heard of me?" I asked, incredulous.

"Not per se," Carth laughed. "I think the exact wording was 'she's either a saint, or an idiot. Let's hope saint, because that's what will drive Canderous the most insane.'"

"Sounds just like her," Canderous said, and to my surprise, he was laughing. "Nice to know she hasn't changed."

_You think it's funny? _I asked, incredulous.

_Sure, Wildcat, _was his amused answer. _She and I had this bickering thing going almost the entire time we traveled together. I noticed she tended to treat people she reluctantly admired harsher than those she didn't care anything about. It never bothered me._

_You have strange friends, _I said wonderingly.

_Don't we all?_

_Point for you._

"Accommodations accomplished, then," Canderous said. "Now, battle plans."

There was an air of expectation as everyone leaned forward to discuss this topic. Mira and Disciple looked particularly eager, with Atton a close second. Ladria, Carth, Canderous, Jarxel, and Bao Dur all had calm, almost bored expressions, but I knew better. Visas alone seemed only mildly interested, watching everyone with her usual cool serenity. I myself was eager as a new recruit and trying hard not to show it.

"Yes," said Elder Gregor. We all turned to look at him. "Battle plans. Master Ladria has been kind enough to see that we have enough fighters to hand that it will not be necessary to improvise the battle ecstasy test." He gave the impression of a bow to her, and she nodded back. "Admiral Onasi has been gracious in providing men," he nodded at Carth, who inclined his head in acknowledgement. "All that is left to do is to divide the teams, so to speak, according to our guidelines."

"Which are?" Canderous asked.

"Simple enough," Elder Drane interjected with a smile. "All available Mandoa will fight with the Mandalore and Jennet, of course. We will need at least ten experienced warriors to observe the battle along with our Council."

"Great," muttered Jarxel. "And guess who gets to assign that? Can we say mutiny?"

"Don't worry about it," Canderous said to his grumbling XO. "Whoever draws that detail will have lead roles in the wedding battle."

"Wedding battle?" I blurted. "No one said anything about a wedding battle!"

"I thought you've been talking to the Elders about traditional weddings," Canderous said, puzzled.

"I have," I shot an accusing look at their end of the table. "No one mentioned anything about that."

"Sorry, dear," Elder Evana said apologetically. "There's always at least some sort of celebratory fight during a Mandalorian wedding. I guess we didn't think to mention it."

"No, it's okay, fine, really," I said, trying to regroup. "Um, how many fighters, and who is supposed to be in it?"

"Well, the groom, of course, and the bride too if she's a warrior," Elder Evana said brightly. "And the wedding party."

"I have at least one attendant that will not be participating," I said firmly. "Megari is not a fighter."

"Oh, that's all right dear," Elder Evana assured me.

"Does this take place before or after the ceremony?" I asked.

"Before," Elder Gregor said. "In the morning. There's a couple of hours break for the wedding party to clean up, and after the ceremony, there's the celebration."

"Anything about that you need to tell me now?" I asked with some asperity.

"The ritual flogging of the bride takes place after cake," Elder Evana said serenely. "And the public certification of virginity, of course."

I stood up so fast my chair fell over. "WHAT?!"

"Elder Gregor made me say that," she said with a twinkle, "To get back at you over your comments about the Helm."

Canderous was laughing uproariously, and I scowled at him. "A little support, here," I snapped.

"You should have seen your face, Wildcat," Canderous said, manfully trying to throttle back to a chuckle.

"No one told me there was a target painted to my forehead," I grumbled as Dax helpfully set my chair upright and I took my seat again. He was grinning broadly, and the rest of the table was trying not to laugh too loudly. I finally smiled sweetly at Elder Gregor.

"Nice to know you actually have a sense of humor," I said wryly. He nodded gravely back, but there was a gleam in his eye.

"Okay," Canderous said, pretending to wipe tears of mirth from his eyes, "back to battle plans. What are the rest of the specifications?"

"And then the wedding battle," I said pointedly. "I want a few more details about that."

"There will be the observers," Elder Gregor said, grandly ignoring my demand, "who will help determine if the condition of sharing battle ecstasy is present. There will be a small fight first, with Jennet and Canderous, along with a select few Mandoa, leading against another small group, none of which should be Mandalorian. This will show us if Jennet senses Canderous' battle ecstasy, and he her Force energy. That done, we will have a large battle, incorporating all available Mandoa, against a force of similar or larger size. This will determine the effect of their shared senses, assuming they exist, on other Mandalorians."

"Um, I hate to sound picky," I said carefully, "or for that matter, ungrateful for all the work that has been done on our account. But I thought the point of this was simply to prove that we shared senses while fighting. Why the big battle, if that's all that's necessary?"

"We have a situation that is completely without precedence," Elder Gregor rumbled. "Never in our history have we had an outlander as _any_ mate, let alone that of the Mandalore. You are a warrior of great skill. It would be foolish not to know what effect your presence would have if you were to accompany the Mandalore in battle. Also, if you truly do share this ability, it would be felt by other Mandalorians who fight with you when the group effect takes place."

"That makes sense," I said. "All right then, sorry to interrupt."

"So," Jarxel said briskly, "All we need to determine now is the size of both sides of the large battle, and who will participate in the small battle."

"Right," Canderous agreed. "How small of a group do you want for the first fight?" He turned to the Elders, raising an eyebrow in question.

"Certainly less than twenty," Elder Gregor answered, "or you run the risk of merging as a group. Ten should be safe enough."

"With Jarxel, the honor guard, me and Jennet, that is nine. Will that do?" Canderous asked.

"Certainly," Elder Gregor nodded.

"Carth, want to choose twenty of your best?" Canderous asked. "Or maybe thirty; we do want adequate time to get test results."

"That sounded like a challenge," Carth said mildly. "Am I allowed Jedi?"

"Unfortunately, no, not for the first test," Elder Gregor said with some regret. "That would be a fight I would enjoy seeing. They are welcome to participate in the second melee, however."

"Very well," the admiral said diplomatically. "I did fight in the Mandalorian wars, after all, and I have a good idea how they fight. I'll put myself and thirty of my men against you for the first fight. But I get all the Jedi for the second."

"Done," Canderous said with a grin. "Perhaps you and the Jedi would like to participate in the wedding battle?"

"Hello, sitting right here," Mira interjected. "Maybe we want to fight with Jennet. It _is_ her wedding day, you know."

I flashed a sunny smile at her, and she grinned back.

"How about making the wedding battle _really _interesting?" I suggested. "We can have two fights. One with the entire wedding party against a comparable force, the other with me and the Jedi against Canderous and whomever he chooses."

"You would fight against your Mate on your wedding day?" Elder Evana gasped.

"Why not?" I asked. "There isn't anything in the vows that say 'obey', are there?"

Canderous looked at me, a wide grin on his face. "You're on, Wildcat. Well, Carth," he turned to our newest guest, "It looks like you might fight with me twice during my wedding. That is, if you'll consent to stand up with me."

If Carth was surprised, he hid it well. "I'd be honored," he said simply.

"Thanks," Canderous said sincerely. "Let's get the rest of this hammered out, shall we?"

After much discussion, it was decided that all but fifty of the Republic soldiers would fight with Carth for the big battle during the Trial, making the odds slightly in their favor, as he had all the Jedi on his side. The remaining fifty would fight along side the Mandalorians. After that, Carth would stay as our guest until the wedding, sending his men back to the Eternity. The wedding itself would take place in nine days.

For the wedding day itself, the first fight would be the wedding party against half the camp, then Canderous, Carth, the honor guard, and eleven other warriors against me and the Jedi. Everyone was satisfied with the arrangements, and the party broke up, with the Elders and most of our friends drifting off to their own pursuits. Carth broke away for a moment to comm his ship with instructions for landing. Jarxel, Ladria, Canderous and I remained at the table, talking about general things until we were more or less alone, the honor guard still being at their stations.

"The transport will land in about a half hour," Carth reported. "I'll need to be there when they do, but I'm yours until then."

"I'm grateful for your help," Canderous said formally. "But I'll admit I'm surprised. I wasn't expecting you for another two weeks, and then I thought you'd be alone."

"Well, Ladria here got me to thinking," Carth said seriously. "She pulled rank, sort of, when asking if I could provide some troops for your Trial. She may not be a part of the Republic army anymore, but she _was_ a general with us once, and garners a lot of respect. And she's most persuasive," he said with a smile. Ladria smiled back serenely.

"What did you say to him?" Canderous asked bluntly, giving Ladria a wary eye.

"Only that I thought an alliance between the Mandoa and the Republic was a very good idea, especially as the Mandalore was an acknowledged Hero of the Republic," Ladria said in her honey and steel voice. "I might have pointed out that you were instrumental in saving the Republic's ass again, as well," she added with unaccustomed vulgarity.

"Thank you for the testimonial," Canderous said sardonically, "but I wasn't that much help."

"We all worked together," Ladria pointed out. "It was a group effort. You were the one who figured out how to blow up the Ravager, I might add. I merely confirmed your participation in the mission."

"Along with her endorsement, she pointed out that by helping the Mandoa, and securing their help in return, we all benefit in the fight against the Sith. I had already come to this conclusion, but Ladria provided the needed leverage to make it a real possibility to the higher ups. In short, the Chancellor has agreed to allow me to come to terms with you," Carth said.

Canderous stared at him for a moment, then slowly smiled. "Then I guess we have a lot to talk about."

"Absolutely," Carth agreed. "But I have a transport to meet soon, so we can do this later. I'll be here a while. Let's get through this Trial first, and we can talk treaties before the wedding. Okay by you?"

"More than," Canderous said, offering his hand.

"Done, then," Carth grinned, and clasped his hand firmly.


	55. Chapter 55

**Canderous**

With the arrival of two hundred Republic troops, the camp was suddenly triple in population, with controlled confusion reigning for the first couple of hours as everyone got settled. My irritation of being kept in the dark was fading, and Jarxel, excellent XO that he is, had already briefed the men on my expectations. Carth had not said so, but I knew part of the next few days was an experiment as to how well the two cultures would work together.

I expected that when we fought with the Republic, we would be our own unit, rather than incorporating us into the regular troops; in fact, I was going to insist on that. Mandalorian group battle ecstasy could be an important contribution to any battle, and we would not have access to it scattered. However, we likely would be fighting along side Republic soldiers, and interacting with them when we're not in battle. We wouldn't be useful if either side resented the other to the point of constant insubordination.

A short word with Jarxel told me what he'd said to the men: basically, that they didn't have to coddle the Republic troops who were visiting, but the Mandalore would personally disembowel anyone who caused a riot, an uninvited injury, or a death. If a soldier consented to enter the battle circle, fine; we'd heal him when he crawled out of it. Otherwise, save their energy for the Trial, and remember we are allies now.

Carth had his men well in hand as they trooped through the camp to the temporary barracks. I looked over the soldiers as they filed by, and approved of Carth's choices. Most looked seasoned and serious about their business, with the irreverent gleam of an experienced warrior in their eyes. About one third were women. Not that this was in any way unusual, nor would my men have any problem fighting females; we are, after all, a very equal society in that way. The only reason we had no women until now in the camp is there had been none to be found. But I made a mental note to keep an eye out for any misunderstandings. If Carth chose them, it was guaranteed these women were excellent warriors, and my men would find that very attractive.

There were about thirty or so wide-eyed youngsters sprinkled among the veterans, and I nodded at the wisdom of selecting a few talented newbies to learn by example from their elders. Carth had obviously hand-picked the bunch, probably wanting mostly clear-thinking seasoned troops who would prove a challenge to the Mandoa. He was just enough of a diplomat that he didn't want the Republic to fall completely on their ass. He also likely wanted troops that would fight well enough to earn _our_ respect. Very smart.

I had my men lined up in formation as the newcomers marched by, and the two camps watched each other warily. Carth directed his men to salute not just him, but me as well as they passed, and I ended up spending the next five minutes with my arm up. I was pretty sure he did that on purpose; he did have a subtle sense of humor. Jarxel escorted Carth to his personal quarters, and the admiral let his troops settle in under the watchful eyes of his chief, lieutenant, and captain.

Lorna requested at least twenty more hands to assist in the kitchens. I rounded up the best cooks in the camp and handed them over to Lorna with fierce admonition that in the mess hall, _she_ was the Mandalore. It was decided that the men would eat in shifts, as we didn't have enough tables and chairs to accommodate two hundred more troops, and they'd only be here for a few days anyway. I directed Dax to make up a meal roster, so that there would always be some of our men mixed in with the Republic soldiers. I made a mental note to speak to Carth about it.

Jennet, meanwhile, was jumping in and helping where she could, but feeling rather cranky and useless.

"Isn't there _something_ I can do that isn't personal?" Jennet complained. "I'm feeling guilty that so much work is being done for _my_ wedding, and I haven't lifted a finger to help. I mean, your men constructed the battlefield in three days, and I was up on Onderon, _shopping_!"

"Cyar'ika, what would you be doing, if this was a wedding with someone who isn't the Mandalore?" I asked.

She looked at me, startled. "What do you mean?"

"What sort of preparations would you be making?" I asked patiently.

"Well…wedding dress fittings, picking out flowers, choosing a cake, finding decorations, that sort of thing, I guess. Sending invitations and making lists, and choosing music. Assuming, of course, I didn't just elope." she seemed puzzled by my wanting to know, but answered readily enough.

"Right. In other words, you'd be doing all the work, and your groom would basically show up and get the benefit." I said gruffly. "I notice, however, nowhere on that list was 'prepare for a battle to prove I'm the Mate to the Mandalore'. And I also noticed that you aren't getting any of the traditional things of _your_ culture. No flowers or decorations, no invitations. The music will likely be by a military piper and drums. Lorna is making a cake, but I have a feeling it's not going to be what you think of as a wedding cake. In short, you're giving in to all my traditions, and not insisting on any of your own. So why shouldn't we do all the work? And you might have noticed I was right there on Onderon with you while they built the field."

"All right, you have a point there. But none of that other stuff matters much to me," Jennet protested. "All I want is to marry you, dammit. I thought it was a good idea to make it as much in Mandoa tradition as possible, since I'm the outlander."

"It is a good idea, Wildcat. And you showed from the start that you accept my people exactly as they are. Why do you think they want to work so hard to see that you are confirmed as my Mate, and your wedding goes smoothly? They adore you, cyar'ika, and this is how they show it. So quit feeling guilty. I promised the honor guard we'd have another lesson today if there's time; that's something you can prepare for."

I kissed her forehead, and she looked up, smiling. Standing on tiptoe, she kissed me back, and I gathered her in for a moment. When she pulled back, her eyes were shining.

"They really love me?" she asked softly, her voice tinged with wonder.

"They really do. _I _love you, and my men are well trained to follow the Mandalore," I grinned at her.

She gave me a light punch on the arm with a mock scowl. "Don't make a joke of this. And say that again."

"They really do," I said obediently, smirking.

"After that," she ordered, mouth twitching with suppressed mirth.

"My men are well trained…" I broke off, laughing as she attempted to slug me across the face. She wasn't trying very hard, however, and I caught the fist easily, grabbing her around the waist with the other hand and hauling her clean off the ground. Nose to nose, I looked into her soft brown eyes.

"I love you, cyar'ika," I said, letting go of her fist and tracing the line of her jaw with a fingertip.

"I love you too, ti kar'ta," she said, a little breathlessly.

I kissed her soundly, savoring the taste of her. She kissed me back with equal enthusiasm. We broke apart as someone cleared their throat nearby.

"Excuse me, Mandalore," one of the newly appointed kitchen workers was grinning at us. "Lorna says she needs more food supplies if we're going to be feeding so many."

"Kex is quartermaster," I said, setting Jennet down. "Talk to him about supplies, and tell him to come speak to me or Jarxel if there's any problems."

"Yes Sir," the soldier made a snappy salute, and turned to leave, but hesitated. "Oh yes, she also wanted to know if we wanted a feast today, in welcome of our guests, or tomorrow in celebration of the end of the Trials."

"Both would be great if she can manage it," I answered. As that lad headed back to the kitchen another swiftly took his place, saying Admiral Onasi had some questions, when I had time.

"If I know Carth, he's already on his way," I said. "Wildcat, do you think you can head him off and see what he wants?"

"Sure," Jennet said, and trotted off.

Jarxel returned, and between the two of us we took care of the million little details that needed our immediate attention.

_Carth wants to know where the restricted areas are, _Jennet's voice reported in my head.

_Tell him his men are to enjoy the run of the camp, with the exception of the guest house and my private quarters, _I answered. _Carth himself has no restrictions._

_Figured as much, _Jennet said cheerfully.

_Warn him about not allowing anyone to leave camp alone, and taking a Mandalorian guide if they do venture out. I might arrange some hunting parties later._

_Will do, _Jennet answered, and her voice was gone.

Ladria and the rest of the Ebon Hawk crew had opted to live shipboard while the Republic troops were present, to free up their sleeping areas for Carth's officers. With the Ebon Hawk in the hanger within the camp's boundaries, this was less of an inconvenience than it sounded.

After what seemed forever, we finally got everything in hand, and I was free to take a breath and find Jennet. Ladria and our other Jedi friends had been instrumental in helping to make everyone feel welcome. Mira looked grumpy about having to be pleasant to so many strangers, but I was proud that she managed it; I knew first hand how difficult it was. Soon, there was a mix of Republic and Mandalorian soldiers wandering about camp, striking up tentative conversations and taking the first steps to getting used to each other. I was pleased with the camaraderie so far.

_Where are you, Wildcat? _I asked as I strode out of the mess hall.

_Over at the new field. I just sent Dax to round up the class. Carth is here too, he's interested in observing, _Jennet's pleasant voice was warm. _Got things under control?_

_Running smooth, _I confirmed, and made my way to the field, Kelborn and Xarga in tow. _I'm glad Dax found you; I sent him to you after he'd made the mess shift schedule. I don't want you to be without at least one honor guard member while Carth's troops are here._

_You aren't seriously suggesting I'm in any danger, are you? _Jennet said, incredulous. _They're here to make an alliance, fer shit's sake!_

_No, I'm not, _I answered, amused. _Politics, Wildcat. You're the second most important member of this camp, or officially will be in nine days. Most important, actually, if you consider that you could be used to get to me. Therefore, you have to subtly show your rank, so to speak. Carth already knows, and as semi-friends we don't need the window dressing. But his men will see it, and respond._

_Ah. You know an awful lot about diplomacy for someone who until recently had no use for it, _Jennet said admiringly.

_I'm a quick study, _I said with an inward chuckle. _And after eight years of working for the Exchange, you pick things up. Works about the same, except the killing was a lot more personal._

I arrived shortly at the field, and we had our lesson. A few minutes into it, we attracted a sizable crowd of both Mandalorians and Republic soldiers. Jennet ignored the gawkers, and concentrated on the lesson. Carth actually participated fully, one he understood what it was for, and seemed to pick up on the technique fairly quickly. Not perfectly, of course, but he could hold concentration for longer than Tagren or Zuka.

There were a few admiring comments I overheard, directed at Jennet as she helped each of the class in turn. Some were less about her fighting and more about her physical attributes, and I scowled, but couldn't pinpoint who had said it. But there was a collective gasp of admiration as she made a particularly fast and intricate move to avoid a kick from Jarxel, who was progressing astonishingly.

Eventually, the crowd wandered away, and we drilled for a while longer. Jennet dismissed the class, but mindful of my wishes, kept Dax and Kex with her. Mira tagged along, chatting with Jennet. Carth approached me, looking relaxed and casual, pulling his tunic back on over his undershirt.

"She's quite a woman," he said without preamble, nodding at Jennet. "You're a lucky man."

"Thanks," I said, smiling at my Wildcat. "I know I am."

"She reminds me a little of Revan," Carth said softly, so only I could hear. "I'm looking forward to seeing her fight. Jennet moves the same way she does. But she's a lot quicker to laugh, and talks a lot more."

I looked sideways at the admiral, trying to gauge this burst of admiration. "Yeah, she's special," I said neutrally.

Carth sent me a swift look, and chuckled. "She is, but you have nothing to worry about from me," he assured me. "I see how she looks at you."

"I knew that," I said with confidence. "I just want to know _you_ do."

"I miss Revan," Carth said suddenly, and looked over at Jennet. "They don't look a thing alike, but they both have the same…aura, I guess. Your Jennet just reminded me, that's all."

"She'll come back. She's strong, and she loves you. You just have to have faith." I said, not looking at him, to respect his privacy. I had no idea why he was confiding in me, of all people. But I'm not the complete asshole people assume. I understood now, the feeling of emptiness if you can't touch the person that is most important to you. I wanted, in some small way, to give Carth hope.

"I do," Carth said quietly. "I never realized you did, though."

"I didn't," I said, watching Jennet and smiling. "Until a month ago."


	56. Chapter 56

**Canderous**

The feast that night was enjoyed immensely by all. Carth and his officers joined us at the high table, having worked out a dining schedule for the rest of the troops. It necessitated all of us being there for longer, but we enjoyed talking and catching up, and getting to know Lieutenant Gordon Grant and Captain Adron Bard. I was fairly impressed by how relaxed they were, being surrounded by Mandalorians. I noticed that they treated Carth with easy respectful familiarity, and liked that too. I had known Carth was an excellent leader, but it's always good to see it in practice.

Jennet was in her element, chatting with everyone and seeing to their comfort. She drew many admiring comments and glances, the latter of which she noticed not at all, as far as I could see. I was proud of her, dressed in a dark blue gown of modest cut but that hung in such a way that her petite figure was set off very pleasingly. It was the first time I'd seen her in a dress and I made sure she saw my appreciation. The deep blue made her skin glow and her hair look almost gold.

Poor Lt. Grant was obviously smitten and spent a good deal of time pretending not to be staring at her, dropping several utensils in the process. Jennet treated him kindly, and I caught from her she had sympathy for his plight, if some private amusement. She found it charmingly flattering, and I chose not to glower over it. Carth, no fool, cast a swift glance at me, smiled wryly, then chose to ignore the situation completely.

The seating at the high table shifted continuously as people got up to join conversations or were motioned over to discuss some point or another. It was the relaxed atmosphere of an improvised party, rather than the stiff formality of a state dinner, and everyone seemed to respond to it. I watched the general crowd from time to time and was pleased to see Mandalorian and Republic soldiery alike chatting away with each other, swapping stories and such.

When the final shift had eaten their fill, we all filed out to the bonfire, and sat around, listening to the music and watching the flames. It was the dancing that really got everyone going, though, once we started. The women were still outnumbered four to one, but the circle spread clear back almost to the barracks. It was about a half hour before Jennet was back with me, laughing and flushed, the fire reflected in her eyes. The Elders signaled the end of the festivities with an announcement that the final Trial would take place at noon tomorrow. At their commander's signal, everyone filed off towards their beds. Jennet and I stayed until the last of the party headed out, Carth waving goodnight as he strode off to his room.

"That went very well," Jennet observed, hiding a yawn behind her hand.

"I think so," I agreed. "I'm impressed by how well everyone is getting along."

"Fifteen years is a long time," she said softly. "Most of those soldiers were children when the war ended. They have no real connection to it. People change, adapt to shifting alliances and situations. It'll take some time, but everyone will adjust."

"I suppose you're right, Wildcat. I did."

"There you go. Now take me to bed before I fall asleep on my feet. We have a test to pass tomorrow."

"Anything you say, cyar'ika," and I scooped her up to carry her to bed.

The next morning I woke to find Jennet already awake and dressed. I don't out sleep her often, and gazed at her with blurry surprise.

"What time is it?" I asked, sitting up and pinching the bridge of my nose between thumb and forefinger. I had a slight headache. I felt a warmth, followed by a tingling across my shoulder and neck muscles, and felt much more relaxed, the headache gone. I smiled my thanks to Jennet and groped for a robe.

"0710," she reported with a glance at the clock. "I woke early, but you looked so comfortable I didn't want to wake you."

"How long have you been up, cyar'ika?" I found the robe and was starting to put it on when she came over to me, standing almost between my knees. Robe forgotten for the moment, I pulled her down to my lap. She's such a huge presence in my life, a ferocious and skilled fighter who is easily able to take down much larger opponents, that I tend to forget how small she actually is. I was a little amazed when my hands actually did, literally, encircle her waist as I coaxed her down for a kiss.

"A couple hours," she gasped as I nuzzled her ear.

She'd been working out, I could tell by the faint odor of her sweat. And under that, a sweet but musky scent that was simply her. She didn't wear perfume often, and when she did it was a light fragrance. As far as I was concerned, she never had to; I love the way she smells. I teased her for a few moments, to her delight and my growing need.

"I went for a run around the camp, and worked out some," she said a little breathlessly as I transferred attention to the hollow of her throat. "Don't worry, I took Xarga with me. He and Kelborn were on duty when I got up. I think it's Zuka and Dax now. How do they get by with so little sleep?"

"There's six of them, with only three hours night duty each. They're trained to sleep when they can. Aren't you?" I was nibbling the place where her neck and shoulder met, and she was making little gasping noises. I grinned to myself.

"Yeah, I guess so," she said. "Carth was up too, and we sparred for a while. He's a good fighter."

My head came up, although I deliberately kept it to a casual tilt rather than a snap. "Was he? And how is the good Admiral this morning?"

"Charming, but tenser than he lets on. He's got to have a lot on his mind," Jennet reported, looking me in the eye, not fooled by my casualness. "Did you fail to hear Xarga was with me? And would it matter even if he wasn't?"

"No, Wildcat, I trust you completely; Carth too, for that matter. He's not the sort that would make a play for an unavailable woman, let alone the fiancé of a friend," I dipped my head and made her squeal faintly.

"He's lonely," Jennet said softly. "I feel sorry for him. He's a nice man."

"Yeah, he is," I rested my chin on her hair.

"I'm nervous about the fight," she admitted quietly after a moment. "That's why I woke up so early. So much could go wrong. We've never tested trying to use the ecstasy with other Mandalorians before, if it even works. What if it doesn't? Or what if it does, but makes everyone react badly, and we can't fix it? I couldn't stand to see you go off to war without me."

"It's going to be fine," I said firmly, pulling back and looking her in the eye. "We've managed so far, even when things got hairy, like when you were on stim. We'll have the energy dampeners, and everyone out there can take care of themselves."

"I hope you're right," she said, frowning.

"I am right," I said confidently.

I pulled her closer to me, and felt her heartbeat slowly go back to normal, and the tension in her body ease.

"Feel better?" I asked.

"Much," she answered.

Then she started distracting me. It was a good hour or so before we emerged from our room.

We eventually made our way to the mess hall for breakfast, where Jennet proceeded to amaze our guests with her appetite. She had eaten in front of them last night, of course, but everyone had been talking and shifting around, so it had not been as apparent then.

"Miss Jax, I think there's a cauldron of oatmeal left back there," Carth teased. "Can't have you fainting from hunger, now."

"I hate oatmeal," Jennet informed him, cheeks faintly pink.

"Ah. More eggs, then?" He made to hand her the platter, but she shook her head, smiling.

"I'm full, thanks," she said with dignity.

"That won't last," I heard Dax murmur behind us, and she turned even pinker.

"I don't hear anyone complain of her appetite when they're being healed by her," I said mildly, and she shot me a grateful look.

"I've seen Jedi healing, of course," Carth said, puzzled. "Experienced it first hand many times, in fact. But while I admit most Jedi do seem to need more fuel than the rest of us, Jennet is in a class of her own. You must have an amazing metabolism."

This led to a brief discussion of Jennet's healing abilities, followed by a more in depth debate analyzing fuel consumption vs. expulsion of energy, led by Disciple. The engineers and pilots of the table especially got into the verbal fray. Jennet just watched, shaking her head.

"Well," she broke in after a while, "All I know is I get hungry."

This made everyone laugh, and more or less signaled the end of breakfast.

We had a little more than two hours until the Trial, and Jennet wanted to re-check her armor and weapons, as did I. Giving everything a final thorough inspection, we helped each other suit up. Neither of us needed it, naturally, but I liked the intimacy of the act. The buckling and strapping, adjusting fit and making sure everything was comfortably in place. I found it almost as erotic as _un_dressing each other. Almost.

We arrived at the battlefield almost an hour early, and were unsurprised that at least half the participants were already there. The day before I had ordered a detail to set up chairs and a few small tables for the Elders and some of the onlookers; these were now all occupied and people were milling around. All of the Jedi were already present, and I saw Megari seated near the tall form of Bao Dur. Danni was not with her and I supposed she was in the care of Lorna. I spotted Carth, who was wearing a new style of armor, beautifully made, obviously high quality with excellent protection. I strode over and clapped him on the shoulder, nodding to his suit.

"Far cry from salvaged bits picked up during our mission," I said, grinning. "That's nice stuff."

"Thanks," Carth said with a nod and a wry smile. "I preferred some of the armor we used then, in some ways, but command insisted I have the best available. It's their credit; I'll go along with it. I admit it's pretty comfortable, for armor. I see you have top quality as usual. You always were good at crafting your own."

"It's in the blood," I said with some pride. "We're taught from practically birth. I made Jennet's too…well, modified it, anyway. I plan on making her a complete set soon."

"Beautiful job," Carth said, admiring Jennet's easy movement. "Very light, I can see."

"The way she fights, bulky armor gets in her way. She's quick enough that less protection isn't that big of a deal."

"I can see that."

"Yeah, she told me you two sparred this morning. How bad did she beat your ass?" I asked with a glint in my eye.

"If we'd really been fighting, she probably would have taken me out in less than ten minutes," he admitted ruefully. "We were just getting a workout, is all. But I've seen her in action." He looked me straight on and told me about the security tapes.

"Damn, and we thought we'd covered our tracks well," I growled.

"You did; we were just persistent. The reports at first sounded like there might be a new underworld power out there, and it never does to be unaware of something like that. Imagine my surprise when I recognized you." He thought of something, and frowned. "I would have thought you'd know about this already; I'd told Jennet yesterday when she was showing me the camp. With your, er, mental communication I pretty much assumed you'd heard the story."

"It can work like that, yeah, but we don't listen to every conversation or stray thought; it'll drive you insane. She probably meant to tell me, but we were both pretty busy," I shrugged.

"Interesting," Carth said doubtfully. "I'm not sure I'd enjoy a condition like that."

"You might, once you get used to it," I said. "It makes things…clearer. And it's very handy to have in battle or when you're some distance from each other. And it's not like we had a choice, anyway."

"I'd like to hear more about being Mates sometime, if you don't mind talking about it," Carth said with a charming smile.

"Admiral Onasi can mind his own damn business," I said pointedly.

He grinned, unoffended. "Admiral Onasi would have a professional interest, true. But he doesn't need to know everything."

Jennet stalked up, smiling with a touch of steel. "Would it help if I found you gentlemen a ruler?" she asked sweetly.

Carth and I looked at each other and laughed.

"No, Wildcat," I said, grinning. "We're just getting reacquainted."

"It's been a long time, yes," Carth said easily.

Jennet eyed us both suspiciously, but nodded and walked away.

We watched her start talking to Dax, then Carth turned back to me. "Seriously, Canderous, I'm just interested in my friends, that's all. What I've heard so far is fascinating, but if talking about being Mates is too personal, that's fine. And I won't ask Jennet either," he said sincerely.

"Nah, it's okay," I said low. "I'm just not eager to be part of an official record, and I sure as hell don't want Jennet to be. She spent her whole life until recently staying under the radar because she was terrified about what the Jedi council might do with a trained Force sensitive. I don't want any more interested parties poking around."

"There won't be," Carth said quietly. "Anything you choose to tell me about yourself or Jennet is simply between friends."

"I appreciate that," I said.

The Elders rounded up the leaders then and outlined the rules of engagement.

"As you all know, the purpose of these melees are to determine if the condition of shared battle ecstasy exists between the Mandalore and Jennet Jax, and if so, to further ascertain if that condition can be shared with the Mandoa warriors in general. Therefore, the first battle cannot end until we have collected enough data. We will have ten warriors stationed around the battlefield, observing the fight, to aid us in our conclusions. However, we understand that to fight only until we have collected said data is not necessarily what each team desires," Elder Gregor looked around the little circle consisting of me, Jennet, Jarxel, Carth, and Captain Bard.

I noted without surprise that Lt. Grant was not going to be in the first fight. He seemed capable enough, but if I knew Carth, he would pick his absolute best and most seasoned soldiers for this fight. He wanted to help, but he also wanted to win. I grinned; that was fine by me. Carth caught my smile and gave me one back that confirmed my conclusion. We nodded at each other in perfect understanding. Jennet saw the both of us and rolled her eyes.

"Therefore," Elder Gregor continued, "the rules of engagement are thus: both sides will keep to a holding pattern until we sound the klaxon." He nodded at Elder Drane, who had a small device on the small table next to his chair. Punching a button, it emitted a piercing sound, the same that on most starships signals danger. It was loud and penetrating enough to be heard over the sounds of battle. All of us winced involuntarily, and I saw more than a few clap their hands reflexively over their ears.

"When you hear the klaxon, you may continue the fight however you wish. During the second battle, we feel there will be no need to employ this, as there will be enough fighters on both sides that the battle will last long enough to gather what data is needed. However, if it sounds at any time then, it is a signal to halt where you are as there is an emergency situation. Are there any questions?" Elder Gregor glared around the circle, as if daring anyone to admit they didn't understand. No one did.

"Excellent idea," Jennet commented, nodding at the klaxon.

"We thought so," Elder Gregor said smugly. "Besides, we love to watch a good fight."

Dismissed from the Elders, the leaders all rounded up their troops for strategy. Making sure we were well away from the opposing team, I motioned the honor guard and Jarxel to form a circle around Jennet and me.

"Here's the plan," I said without preamble. "I know Admiral Onasi has seen Jennet fight, and you can bet your last credit that he's studied her well. He'll know that she's the biggest threat we have, and will take steps to take her out as soon as that klaxon sounds. So Jarxel, stay with me; Kex and Dax, I want you to back Jennet up. If possible, Jennet and I will fight back to back; we work best that way. So you three take up positions near us, guarding your assigned leader. If any of you see an opportunity to take Admiral Onasi out of the fight, take it; same goes for Captain Bard. Leaderless, they haven't a chance."

Everyone nodded at this assessment. With a savage smile, I continued. "But those two know what they're doing, _and_ they'll know I know it. Plus, they'll be expecting you all to protect me and Jennet at all costs. So here's what we'll do: Jennet and I will go for Onasi and Bard."

There was a start of surprise from most of the assembly, but both Jennet and Jarxel nodded slowly.

"They won't be expecting that," I said with a grin. "Jennet will be their primary target; I want her protected. I'll be the secondary. I need you three to guard our backs. Xarga, Zuka, Kelborn, Tagren: your assignment is to hang back with blaster support. You four are the best shots in camp; make every one count. We'll form up with Jarxel on my left, Jennet on my right, Dax and Kex covering Jennet, with Zuka, Xarga, Tagren and Kelborn behind. We'll play nice until the klaxon, then push ahead. Keep in mind though, we can take out as many as ten before the signal, and still keep the test valid. Any questions?"

No one had anything to add or ask, and we gathered at the edge of the battlefield. Carth and his party stood not far from us, and we exchanged nods. This was going to be fun.


	57. Chapter 57

Author's note: Well, here we are, the first Mate battle, against Republic soldiers lead by Carth; I hope I've made it believeable and enjoyable. It's been seven chapters since I've made any comments, so I thought I'd throw in some. I've had a lot of fun writing this so far, and Canderous and Jennet are a hoot when they get to talking. It's getting close to the end of their story, though.

We'll have the big Mate battle next chapter (and oh my Gods, do I dread getting that one written...I enjoy the fight scenes when I've finally gotten them down, and I do like visualizing moves, trying to come up with creative but not unbelievable situations. But man, it's a chore for me, and I haven't written a battle scene that involves three hundred+ people before. If I really screw it up, please let me know, gentle readers, but be kind; the muse is deathly afraid of fire. But I _do_ want to know, and if I do a lousy job, I promise I'll either improve, or never, never try to write a big battle scene again).

After that, (no spoilers, I promise) we have a week before the wedding, with Carth hanging around and discussing treaties. I expect Jennet and Canderous will exchange their wedding gifts, too.

Anyway, enjoy the fight, and keep the reviews coming, I truly appreciate honest feedback.

Always, LJ

* * *

**Jennet**

The battle started as most do, sudden and loud. Admiral Onasi's men came forward with a clash of steel and roar of blasters. I spotted Carth toward the back of his band. Captain Bard was also near the back, but some distance from Carth. This I took in with a quick look over the battle; mostly, I didn't have time for analyzing. As soon as we engaged, we were up to our eyebrows.

Zuka, Xarga, Tagren and Kelborn were blasting away, spread out so that we were not in their line of fire. Canderous and I stepped forward as one, with Jarxel, Dax, and Kex positioned nearby. All five of us were armed with swords, although I was the only one with one in each hand. I blocked the first thrust aimed my way and smacked the offending blade aside. I didn't have time to follow that with a kill; two more blades were vying for my attention and I was kept busy. I felt Canderous moving to position us back to back, and saw Dax and Kex shift to cover us. They were both busy with their own engagements, but managed to lure their opponents along.

Then I felt Canderous' battle ecstasy kick in, and my own Force abilities merge with it. There was a familiar rush of adrenaline-like energy, and I was seeing Canderous parry a blade, smack aside another, and thrust hard at the first, taking him down. I sensed him watching my own fight as two soldiers came at me at once, blades so close together it almost looked like one two-handed fighter; one must be a lefty. I slipped my own blades between theirs, with a twist of the wrists shoved them up, and took them both out with thrusts to the gut. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Dax block a blow meant for me and take out the man that had delivered it. Canderous and I began to move as one, smoothly turning to meet opponents, and mentally warning each other of danger.

_How many so far?_ I asked.

_Me, two. I think Jarxel got one, no idea the others. You?_

_Two; Dax got one, Kex one, not a clue about the shooters._

The two sides were now in a true holding pattern; no one was trying to kill, but they _were _trying to wear each other out. I felt Canderous's growl of frustration; he wanted the gauntlets off and to get down to business.

_Want to make things interesting? _I tossed out.

_Sure, Wildcat, _Canderous answered.

I gave him a mental picture, and felt his grin.

_Hell of an idea. The boys and I can improvise from there. Wait for the klaxon._

We were so in tune that this exchange took almost no time. I edged a little closer to Dax and managed to shout an instruction in his ear. His eyes widened, but he was too busy staying in the fight to argue. He gave me a curt nod, which I almost didn't catch, having two burly grinning soldiers doing their level best to wear my arms to nubs in front of me. We were getting sick of the holding pattern; all of us wanted to _really_ fight. I was wondering how the Elders could tell, anyway, when the klaxon went off. Before anyone had any time to adjust, Canderous and Dax turned toward me, grabbed a handhold on the edge of my armor, and flung me over the heads of the enemy in the general direction of Captain Bard.

It was the most exhilarating flight I'd taken so far. Both Dax and Canderous are insanely strong and had managed to give me enough propultion that combined with assistance from the Force, cannoned me a good span above and some distance over the mass of humanity below. I saw with my shared sight with Canderous both of them drop low and roll back, snagging their swords and popping up back into the fray. I concentrated on landing on my feet, twisting midair to hit ground in small clear spot in the middle of a clump of five soldiers. They were covering the Captain, blasting away. One started violently at my sudden entrance.

"Hey there," I said, grinning, and whacked his blaster clean out of his hands.

The other four started to shoot, and I jumped straight up, fast enough that two were taken out by their own comrades. Landing in the same spot, I hit ground slashing, taking one out with a strike across the face. The other two were down in quick succession, and I whirled to face Captain Bard.

He'd retreated a bit, with two men covering him, and I knew I only had seconds before backup would arrive. Blaster fire roared at me, but I danced out of the way of the energy bolts, heading straight toward the good captain. He had a blaster, and with a swift chop it was no longer a threat. His guards moved to get in front of him, still shooting. I skipped to one side, slashed the one on the right with my right blade and jumped forward to take out the other with a thrust from my left. Another quick double slash and Bard was out of the fight, his sword halfway drawn.

I turned on a heel to find six swordsmen bearing down on me. I launched myself over their heads, taking one out with a blow to the head as I passed. Landing behind, I got two more before they'd turned to track me, a third before he was halfway around. When the other three were facing me, I jumped again, swiftly dispatching them in a whirl of shining steel as I landed.

The crowd was considerably thinner by now, but not where I was standing. Another six were right on me now, and I tried to jump away. One lucky soldier got my foot and yanked, and I landed in an ungraceful heap on my ass, in the middle of a grinning bunch of soldiery. I quickly rolled back on my hands, gripping the hilts of my swords tightly. Thrusting hard, I kicked straight up, my feet landing solidly under the jaw of the man behind me. I deliberately locked my ankles on either side of his neck, made myself dead weight and hung on as he fell backward. I got my fists under me as we fell, blades sticking absurdly out, and shoved myself upright. I was on my feet with swords spinning as soon as the poor guy hit ground, groaning. I kicked him in the head to make sure he was down, took out two more, and jumped away again.

_Behind you Wildcat_ I heard, and whirled smack into another group, with three coming up behind fast. I got a couple with gut thrusts before I was engulfed, and I was pretty sure I got at least another two before the world went away.

I came to only moments later. My attackers were motionless not two feet away. The battle was just about over, and I saw the remnants of the Republic soldiers being picked off by blaster fire as Canderous dealt Carth a death blow. Seeing I wasn't needed, I picked myself up and dusted my pants, looking around for my blades. Once recovered, I sheathed them and strolled up to Canderous, sending a healing blast to Carth. He sat up slowly, eyeing us both with a hairy eye.

"Well," I said conversationally to my Mate, "That didn't go as planned."

"You okay, Wildcat?" he asked touching my temple by reflex.

"Sure," I said with a smile. I looked around, and noted that we were down to the two of us, Zuka, Jarxel and Tagren. I didn't count, really, anyway. Dax was not far from where I had fallen, Kex near him, with Xarga and Kelborn right where they started, probably taken down with blasters. The fallen were starting to stir, and our Jedi friends were approaching the field to help with healing and med packs.

Canderous had offered a hand to Carth, who took it with good grace and was hauled to his feet.

"You won," he said with good humor. "But we got Jennet."

"True," I said cheerfully. "Remind me not to do that again."

"Maybe if you're on stims," Canderous said with a steely smile. "And we can throw you a good deal further."

I shuddered at the thought. "Don't even joke about it. And how did you know, anyway?" I asked Carth. "I wasn't close to you when I went down."

"The look on Canderous' face when he went after me," Carth said with a wry smile.

Jarxel eyed Canderous with some disfavor. "Interesting battle plan, Mandalore. I don't quite recall 'throw our Lady into the fray with abandon' being part of it."

It was a mark of his irritation that he seemed to have forgotten we were still in the presence of the opposing commander. Not that I cared, but I knew by now that Jarxel would normally have never discussed battle strategy in front of an enemy, even a pretend one. I saw Carth, if not quite understanding, but certainly feeling the undercurrent, tactfully stroll off to check on his fallen captain. Canderous snapped around at Jarxel's tone and glowered. Jarxel glared right back. I took a breath, and stepped forward.

"The fault was mine, Jarxel, and I apologize. I saw an opportunity to take out Captain Bard, and to confuse the enemy. There wasn't time to alert anyone but Dax." I looked him in the eye.

Jarxel stared at me a moment, then snorted. "It was creative," he acknowledged, "And you did get the captain, I assume?" At my nod, he grinned. "And then they got you. By the body grouping, you made them work for it. But they _did_ get you. Lesson learned."

I grinned. "Absolutely. I can't promise I won't do anything stupid like that again though."

"In mock battles, I am less wary of it," Jarxel admitted. "But when we go to war, Lady, you are important. If the battle ecstasy works as well as I hope it does, you will be a very crucial part of any campaign. To take risks like that could get us all killed."

"I understand," I said with a nod, "but battle is chaos and sometimes risks turn the tide. I often do my best when I'm improvising."

"We'll find a balance, Lady," Jarxel promised.

Canderous looked between the two of us, a slight frown on his face. "I am the Mandalore, and the final fault lies with me. Jarxel is upset, Wildcat, not because of improvisation but because it was almost exactly opposite of what we had strategized. It was a good idea you had there, and I went with it. We did stick to our original plan somewhat; after all, you and I went for Onasi and Bard. Just not together. And you _were_ killed by deviating from our plan."

"We won, though." I pointed out.

"We won a battle," Canderous agreed. "But if it had been real, it might have cost us the war. We were showing off, Wildcat, admit it."

"No," I said, as realization hit. "_I_ was. You're right, Jarxel. It was stupid of me."

"No harm done, Lady," he said seriously. "Where better to show off, after all? And," he said, suddenly grinning, "you were incredible. By the gods, that was _fun_!"

The Elders signaled us over, and we approached their table. Disciple was sitting on the grass near Elder Gregor, datapad at the ready. The ten observers were standing nearby, looking blank and professional. I frowned. They couldn't possibly say we didn't pass, could they?

"It is confirmed that the condition of sharing battle ecstasy is present between the Mandalore and Jennet Jax," Elder Gregor announced in a loud voice, and the crowd went insane.

A loud cheer went up around us, and I threw myself into Canderous' arms, kissing him wildly in celebration. He kissed me enthusiastically back, swung me around in a circle, tossed me up, and caught me before kissing me soundly again. Laughing and breathless, I caught a glimpse of Disciple, a broad grin on his face, tapping away on his datapad. We were mobbed by Mandoa and Jedi, patting our backs and hugging us. Canderous even got a huge kiss on the cheek from Mira, who was whooping with Dax.

"However," Elder Gregor yelled over the chaos, and Canderous waved everyone to silence. Elder Gregor nodded his thanks, and continued. "However, there is still one test to go. Take an hour, and we'll commence with the final battle."


	58. Chapter 58

I helped patch up the rest of the participants, then turned my attentions to refueling and recovering myself. My spent healing was returning fast, but I was hungry again. Lorna, thoughtful and wise woman that she is, had dragooned some of her kitchen staff into setting up a table loaded with snacks designed to keep a warrior's energy high. Several kegs of ale, jugs of water and other cold beverages were also provided. Canderous I helped ourselves and dug in, seeing that Carth and several of his men had already served themselves and were sitting under a nearby tree. More were forming up a line behind us.

Canderous gathered Jarxel, the honor guard, and the two highest ranking Republic soldiers that were fighting with us together to talk strategy as we ate. The two sergeants, Henders and Quarn, seemed not at all phased by fighting along side the Mandalorians against their own troops. I asked about this, curious, and they both shrugged.

"We drill against each other all the time," Henders clarified. "This isn't any different from that. When Admiral Onasi explained the situation, most of the ship wanted in on the action, and at least half didn't care if they'd be fighting with or against the Mandalorians. Either way, we'd learn a lot," he said with a practical air, Quarn nodding beside him.

"The Admiral picked two hundred out, and afterwards explained to us that the Mandoa are interested in an alliance, and told us that the Mandalore himself was a Hero of the Republic," Quarn said matter-of-fact. "That got a lot of us to thinking that with the Sith threat, it wouldn't be a bad idea to have fighters of your reputation on our side. Especially with the Jedi so decimated now."

"That's good to hear," Canderous said skeptically, "and I'm not saying I don't believe you, son. But it's not like most of my people go out of our way to, let's say, make ourselves popular." He smiled, which makes most people nervous.

Quarn and Henders eyed him warily, but stood their ground. "The general public will come around if you guys help turn the tide of the war," Quarn said wisely. "I've been a soldier long enough to have fought with a number of unlikely allies, and all I care about is if you'll watch my back. And," he added with some spirit, "I don't believe I'm young enough to be your son, Sir."

Canderous gave a bark of genuine laughter. "You'll do, Sergeant Quarn," he said approvingly. "Now, this is the plan…"

The hour ended, and both groups faced off across the field. I saw that the Jedi were ranged in front, regular swords and vibroblades at the ready, as light sabers are unreliable when used with energy dampeners. I did notice all of them kept their 'sabers hooked to their belts. I had Dad's with me too, although for the life of me I had no idea what had made me impulsively grab them when we'd left our room. But the weight of them on my hips, slightly behind the hilts of my spinning blades, made me feel grounded, somehow. That, and the comforting presence of Canderous.

I wasn't frightened about this battle at all; I knew this test was merely an exercise to collect data on whether I could participate in the group sharing of battle ecstasy. The Elders could not dispute I was Canderous' Mate now. They neither could nor, I was sure, _would_ refuse to allow our marriage even if I can't. I was, after all, an outlander; they could not hold one inability against me. I was merely nervous about the possibility of something going wrong. I shook it off as best I could and prepared myself for battle, feeling Canderous doing the same.

The signal, a single shot from a blaster cannon, went off, and the two small armies came together with a roar. As we had discussed during the break, the Republic soldiers, led by Quarn and Henders, went left while Jarxel and Kelborn with fifty of our troops broke right, leaving me and Canderous to punch through the middle with the remainder of our forces. Dax, Xarga and Kex were covering me, with Zuka and Tagren guarding Canderous. I found myself almost immediately facing off with Mira, who grinned maniacally as she did her level best to cut me down. I blocked and parried a few well-placed attacks, ducked under her blade, and dealt a blow that staggered her back a pace, with Dax getting in a blaster shot that put her out of the fight. One Jedi down; I grinned almost as savagely as Canderous.

I felt the Canderous' battle ecstasy flow through me, merging with my own abilities, and we smoothly moved into a united front of steel. It was curious; until I came along, he preferred blasters over blades, but the more we fought together, the more he seemed to grab a sword first. Yet I still didn't care as much for blasters; to me they were clumsy and inaccurate. Amazing what you think about when you're in a fight.

The battle ecstasy ramped higher, and we were shifting effortlessly back and forth, slicing anything that came near, the honor guard taking out stray threats. I could see Canderous fighting off two at once, with Zuka and Tagren busy with their own opponents, and felt him watching me taking on several swordsmen, with my own backup slashing away. I batted aside one blade, thrust the gut of another attacker, and slashed the arm of the third, following up with a death blow to the first. Another chop and the third was out. I waded forward, Canderous following in perfect step.

Then a curious sensation started to tickle my senses. A flow of energy like but unlike the feeling of sharing ecstasy with Canderous ran through me like a barely felt electrical current. I felt myself grow a tiny bit stronger and my arms felt lighter, as if the blades I was wielding suddenly lost mass. I was more aware of Tagren, Dax and Kex fighting near me, and my shared awareness with Canderous grew sharper, almost dangerously so; I could hardly tell where I ended and Canderous began.

The mass battle ecstasy had begun.

All around me, I could feel the Mandalorians' life forces growing stronger and more focused, the wounded but still fighting regaining some of their strength. The feeling grew, and it merged with my own connection with the Force. Unlike when I had first started sharing this with Canderous, I was almost unconsciously assimilating it, taking in the energy and cycling it back out. I felt Canderous directing the awareness, using it to help his fighters stay strong in the face of the enemy. It surged suddenly, an upwelling of pure energy so strong I would have staggered if I wasn't so in tune with its source – Canderous. It started with him, and like tendrils of unseen fog, touched each Mandalorian, siphoning off their power. But instead of draining them to feed ourselves, it cycled back through me, where it was amassed and _purified_ was the closest word I could think of. Combined with the power I drew from the Force, it flowed back into Canderous, and through him, the rest of the Mandalorians.

It was the most incredible feeling I'd ever experienced, and I was almost giddy with power of it. I became aware of every Mandalorian fighter on the field, and could almost _see_ them fighting. It wasn't like Canderous' and my shared sight; more of sensing where everyone was and what they were doing. I found with a little concentration I could actually focus on individuals, while retaining an overall sense of the battle in general.

And suddenly, I realized _they _could feel _me._ All of them. And Canderous too. I wasn't surprised they could feel their Mandalore; from what I'd been told of this condition it was what I expected. But that they could feel me too was indescribably strange and wonderful.

I felt Canderous' exaultation surging through me, and his wild power sending strength out to his men. Moreover, like Jedi Battle Meditation, he could sense the overall pattern of the battle, and direct the troops to plugging holes in defense and taking advantage of openings in the enemy's.

_This is new,_ he said, the singing joy of battle ringing through my mind. I saw him bat aside two swords that were coming at him effortlessly, and take out their owners.

_It doesn't usually work like this? _I asked, striking down two of my own.

_Not this intensely._

I had an idea, and shifted my sight. Immediately, I felt Canderous respond to the heightened awareness, and that ability trickle out to the troops in general. The tide of the battle turned, and we went from a near equal clash between two bands to an almost single unit of destruction, mowing down the enemy in a powerful surge of whirling steel and blazing blaster fire.

Suddenly, I had Ladria in front of me and Canderous and I took her down in perfect synchronized motions of controlled savagery. We advanced, blades moving in a blur of silver, the honor guard blasting away behind us. They effortlessly fired around us, in tune with our movements. I could feel Jarxel and Kelborn slashing and blasting their way through the right flank. I wondered how Quarn and Henders were faring with their band.

Almost as soon as the thought was in my head, I could feel them too, as well as the rest of the Republic troops they were leading, almost as if the power was just waiting for me to express what I wanted. It was different from the battle ecstasy, yet the same. I felt them gain strength and focus, and step up their attack. But this wasn't as powerful as the effect on the Mandalorians, although it was still being directed through me and Canderous. He could not draw from them or unite them as he could his own kin.

_But, _I thought suddenly, _I can._

Using Canderous' ability as a guide, I reached out and touched their essence through the Force, drawing strength, cycling it through Canderous, and feeding energy back to them. I felt their surprise at suddenly sensing me, but they adjusted admirably, and were soon plowing into the enemy with renewed vigor. I glowed with approval, and concentrated on my own fighting as well as helping Canderous focus directing the troops.

Connecting with the Republic troops was the final step to finishing this fight, and we did so in an efficient, deadly manner. I felt the rush of battle start to ebb, and the energy give one last surge through me before cycling down to nothing. I swayed on my feet, feeling a little weak and light-headed. Canderous stood by me, his face shining with sweat and the aftereffects of the experience, his blue eyes electric.

"You okay, Wildcat?" he asked, smiling with a sort of wild joy.

"Yeah," I said, smiling back, and felt myself pitching forward, awareness abruptly gone.

I came to in Canderous' arms, blinking as his worried face hovered above me.

"You know," I said crankily, "twice in one day is ridiculous."

"I felt you pass out, cyar'ika," Canderous rumbled. "The ecstasy drained you."

"Thanks for clearing that up," I said sweetly. "I just thought it was low blood sugar."

"Not the way you eat," he retorted, but quit looking worried. "Can you stand now?"

"Not if you don't let go of me," but I touched his face to soften the remark.

He kissed my fingertips and stood, setting me on my feet. I swayed a little, but my energy was returning quickly. I let the lightheadedness abate, and nodded.

"I'm fine now," I reported.

I looked around, and the carnage was amazing. We had at least two thirds of our troops still standing. Of the Republic troops, every single one was down, although most were stirring and starting to stumble to their feet. The Elders, Megari, and the Jedi who were already back on their feet were beginning to hand out kolto packs and administer medical aid. I moved to join them, but Canderous stopped me with a hand on my arm.

"Wait, Wildcat," he said low.

I turned, and the Mandalorian troops were approaching, Jarxel and the honor guard in the lead. Puzzled, I stayed put and waited for them to approach. Elder Gregor was suddenly next to me, apparently curious as to what was going on. I was curious myself.

Reaching me, Jarxel smoothly went to one knee, the rest of the Mandoa following suit. I looked at Canderous, mystified. He seemed to understand what was happening, but shrugged, and nodded my attention back to the men. He wasn't blocking me, but wasn't sharing either.

"Lady," Jarxel said, head bowed. "We have felt the mass battle ecstasy many times, and it is a powerful experience. But your power was nothing like we've ever felt before, and it gave us a strength and unity that we are proud yet humbled to be a part of. We pledge ourselves to you as our Lady. You are indeed the true Mate of the Mandalore, and the spirit of our people."

I swallowed hard, throat suddenly thick with emotion. I sent a wild look at Canderous, not having a clue what to say.

_Just say what you feel, cyar'ika. _

_Thanks a lot, _I thought irritably.

I was nearly paralyzed with fear of saying or doing the wrong thing; I had no experience at all with this sort of thing.

_I love you Jennet, _was all that Canderous would say, but it steadied me.

"Thank you," I said, loud enough for my voice to carry to the back of the crowd. "I am proud to be your Lady. Please," I stepped forward, and touched Jarxel's shoulder, "you don't need to kneel to me."

He caught my hand, and kissed the back of it. "I am your man, Lady, with the last breath of my body. I will fight with you, and for you, protect you and follow you, and honor you as the Mate to my Mandalore." He touched his forehead to the back of my hand, and stood, taking a position to the right of Canderous, who had unobtrusively come over to stand by me.

Dax scooted forward without standing, taking my hand and kissing it. "As your Champion, Lady, I will fight with you, and for you, protect you and follow you, and honor you as the Mate of my Mandalore. I am your man to the last breath of my body." He touched his forehead to my hand, and stood, taking position to my left.

The rest of the honor guard followed, surrounding Canderous and me, and one by one the men of the camp repeated the ritual, although when they stood, it was in front of me, Canderous and the honor guard. I lost count of the minutes, but finally every one took the oath, for that, Canderous assured me silently, was what it was.

When the last man was standing, Jarxel raised his hand in fist over his head, and bellowed: "Hail to the Lady of the Mandoa!"

"Hail to the Lady of the Mandoa!" roared the crowd. I felt Canderous in my head, warm and strong and so proud.

_You've done well, My Lady,_ I heard, and I smiled through the tears I didn't dare shed.


	59. Chapter 59

**Canderous**

The Elders announcing their findings was both unnecessary and anticlimactic. Understanding that, Elder Gregor kept it brief and to the point. I saw Disciple tapping madly away on his ever-present datapad, grinning all over his face. He caught my eye and gave a victory gesture, which I returned with a grin. The rest of the Jedi, far from being disgruntled about the massacre that we had wreaked upon them, came forward to congratulate us on our triple victory. Jennet hugged our friends, even Carth, who she hardly knew, and said all the right things. But under it, she was numb from the effects of the ecstasy and the outpouring of devotion from the Mandoa. I could feel the sense of being overwhelmed pouring off her, although she hid it well.

She even kissed Elder Gregor, much to his overt dismay and I suspected private delight. He was regarding Jennet much as a granddaughter and was fonder of her than he would ever admit, I thought. Elder Drane took the kiss on his cheek with a quiet good humor that reminded me of Bao Dur, and Elder Evana returned Jennet's kiss with a warm hug, clucking over her like a mother sparrow with one chick.

Ladria, more sensitive to situations than most, slipped her arm through Jennet's and lead her off, obstensively to find something to drink and ask about some point of the wedding plans. She winked back at me as she towed my Mate away, and I nodded back. Mira tagged along, chatting about the battle and lamenting that she had been taken out so early.

Carth strolled up, hand outstretched. "Good fight there," he said.

"Yeah, it was," I said, grinning and shaking his hand. "You gave us a challenge."

"Banthashit," Carth said cheerfully. "We got slaughtered. I'm not entirely sure of the details, but Sergeants Henders and Quarn say they felt some connection with the Mandoa, and more specifically you and Jennet, as they fought. They're quite enthusiastic, and are very sorry I'll be shipping them back tomorrow."

"They're good men," I said. "It was an honor to fight with them."

"In fact," Carth said carefully, "Most of the troops would like to stay for the wedding. You've made quite an impression."

"Can they be spared that long?" I asked curiously.

"Well, it would be up to their commander to say," Carth said with a grin. "As that's me, the answer is yes. I realize having this many in camp for another week would be an imposition at least rations-wise; I can order supplies from Onderon easily enough to cover."

It was my first impulse to refuse, but calculating the cost of feeding that many soldiers for a week shut me up quick. I nodded, and said, "That would be helpful, thanks. And of course, they're welcome to stay. I have to say I'm a bit surprised they want to."

"The war with the Sith isn't what you'd call usual," Carth said seriously. "It's a lot of boring waiting around for something to happen, and there's been precious little action. Not that I regret not putting my men in harm's way, but we know there's a threat out there, we just can't find it. This assignment has been a much needed distraction for them, as well as being an opportunity to introduce our people to each other. But…something big is coming; it's going to break loose soon, I think. The catalyst just hasn't happened yet."

I glanced over at Ladria, who was talking to Jennet and Mira, and thought about what she had said right after we left Malachor V.

_It isn't over yet. The Sith are still out there, and need to be fought._

There had been something in her eyes when she had said that, elusive and determined and sad. I had been fresh with my own grief at the time, but had seen it. Or Jennet had, maybe, and showed it to me.

"No," I said slowly. "But I think it will be soon."

"Congratulations, by the way," Carth said, shifting gears. "I understand you've completed the Mate trials successfully."

"Thanks," I said. "It's been…interesting."

Carth laughed. "I don't think you're ever going to be bored with Jennet around," he said knowingly. "And after that display after the battle, it's obvious your men adore her."

"More than that," I said, my pride in Jennet swelling all over again. "She's theirs, now. They claimed her as Mandoa, and the spirit of our people. As far as they are concerned, she's a true Mandalorian, never mind her birth."

"Quite an honor," Carth said, and I looked at him sharply. But there was no irony there, just simple admiration. "You're proud of her." It wasn't a question.

"Yes," I said simply. "She earned it."

"I don't know about you, but I'm going to get out of this armor and get a shower. Privilege of command; I get first dibs. Anything you need before I make myself scarce for a while? We losers need to slink off and lick our wounds," Carth said with a wink.

"Nah," I said, chuckling with a touch of steel, just so he wouldn't forget I was, after all, Mandalorian. "Go on and sop your pride. There's a feast tonight again, though. 2000; don't be late."

"Wouldn't miss it," Carth promised.

"Hey, Carth….thanks for everything," I said sincerely.

"My pleasure."

Atton and Bao Dur approached as the admiral was leaving, grinning.

"You guys hit like a fracking rampaging Bantha," Atton commented, shaking my hand. "But it did take six to bring me down."

"Only six?" Bao Dur asked with a wicked smile.

"Yeah, well, you've got height and mass on me," Atton groused.

"Poor little man," Bao Dur said in mock sympathy. He turned to me and shook my hand. "Great fight, Canderous. We Jedi felt Jennet connect with the Force, and the effects of that and the battle ecstasy. Not on your level, of course. But what we felt was amazing. To bad it didn't benefit our side."

"It was," I admitted. "Nothing like I've ever felt, let me tell you."

"Her merging with the Republic soldiers was completely unexpected. It's all that the group that fought with you can talk about. If the Republic was interested before, I can bet they'll be eager to sign an alliance with you now," the Iridonian said enthusiastically.

"I hope so," I shrugged. "Carth didn't say as much but I'm thinking you're right."

"You don't seem thrilled with it," Atton said quizzically.

"Oh, I'm glad of it," I said honestly. "Just…well, it's been a long day. And it's not even halfway done yet."

"Ah, I see. Well, we'll let the old man catch his breath here, shall we?" he quirked an eyebrow at Bao Dur, who chuckled.

"Rand, just as I think I might like you, you say some damned fool thing," I said with my vibroblade voice. "Get the fuck out of my sight before I beat you to death with my arthritic fists."

"I'm gone," Atton said cheerfully, "let no one say I don't respect my elders. But before I go…what sort of musician did you want to be, I wonder?" he asked, referring to my joke on Carth yesterday.

"Bagpipes," I said promptly. "So I could make as much useless noise as you. Now go away."

Atton gave a cheery wave which would be interpreted as a rude hand gesture by most people, and disappeared toward the hanger, Bao Dur following with a more sincere wave of farewell.

The crowd was breaking up, some to eat, more to hit the showers and change. Jennet was in a clump of Republic soldiers, one of which was Lt. Grant, hanging adoringly on her every word. Mira, Ladria and Visas were with her, Dax and Kex standing nearby, glaring at the lieutenant, who was dangerously oblivious to this. I saw Megari heading toward the mess hall, looking small and somewhat lost without the ubiquitous presence of Bao Dur with her. Disciple was finishing up with the Elders. Jarxel was talking with Captain Bard, Kelborn and Xarga were with me, and the rest of the honor guard were absent, presumably to shower and change. I was looking forward to that myself.

I had been monitoring Jennet since the end of the battle, and could feel she was about spent from the combination of the physical exertion of fighting, the energy drain of the ecstasy, and the emotional impact of the spontaneous oath ceremony. I slipped up behind her as she chatted and put my arms around her waist. She leaned back gratefully.

"Excuse us, gentlemen," I said easily to her admiring crowd. "And ladies," I nodded to Ladria and the others. "I need to speak to Jennet." With a smile and a wave at her companions, she gracefully exited, following me some distance before turning and kissing me soundly.

"Thank you," she said with feeling.

"No problem. I can feel how tired you are. You're holding up well, though," I complimented.

"I could manage for the rest of the day if I had to," she said with a smile. "But I really just want a shower and maybe a nap. I'm whipped. And isn't there a feast tonight? I expect that will go on all hours."

"Probably," I said, wanting to pick her up and save her the trouble of putting one foot in front of the other. But there were enough people around I knew she wouldn't appreciate the gesture. "Want to share a shower?"

"Sounds lovely," she said, smiling. "It might even wake me up."

"That's what I'm hoping," I said, grinning, and we made our way toward our room.

But apparently showers and rest were not in our immediate future. Jarxel intercepted us not a dozen steps later, Angus in tow.

"Lady," they bowed to Jennet, then me. "Mandalore. With your permission, Lady, it turns out Angus here is handy with needle and ink. I've seen his work on several warriors, and the quality is superior. He could start right away if you wish; there's plenty of time before the feast."

"I thought it took hours and hours," Jennet said, puzzled. "And I thought I didn't qualify until the wedding takes place."

"Well, the ancient way, yes it did," Angus said helpfully. "But I've got modern tools; my traditional ones were lost at the end of the war. It's nearly impossible to find them anymore and I haven't had much reason to fashion new ones. I wanted to keep my hand in, though, so I've maintained a kit with what I could get. Won't take more than a couple of hours, now."

"And," Jarxel added, "You're Mandoa now; the wedding just binds you to the Mandalore."

"Just?" Jennet raised her eyebrows and smiled a little dangerously.

Jarxel didn't flinch, merely smiled back. "Of course that is important, and we're all eager for the formal binding. But you are Mates, and you," he nodded at Jennet, "are ours. The wedding is a significant formality, yet you are bound to Canderous, regardless of it. So, Lady, if it is convenient, Angus can begin."

_So much for a shower, _Jennet said ruefully.

_Wouldn't do, anyway, _I answered. _If possible, it's done while the sweat is barely dried after your first battle._

_Technically, that wasn't my first as a Mandalorian; I wasn't declared until after, _Jennet pointed out, but she was merely arguing semantics, and knew it.

_It's the one you proved you _were, I chuckled inwardly.

"Of course," Jennet said graciously aloud. "Where should we set up?"

"Most of the men will want to watch," Jarxel said. "We thought outdoors, where the light is best, on the battlefield. Zuka and Tagren set up a table."

For the next two hours, Jennet sat as still as a statue, while Angus skillfully applied the phoenix tattoo to her upper right arm. I helpfully removed my armor, baring my own arm for his reference. I was amazed at his artistry; the bird looked ready to fly off, spitting fire and screaming. It might not be traditional tools he was using, but I had to admit that modern equipment didn't seem to create the scabbing I remembered when I first got mine. Jennet had warned Angus to inject the ink as deep as possible, to prevent her healing from fading it too quickly, and I felt her scale it back to the point it was barely functioning on her. I still felt the well of it inside her, though, and marveled again how she could do that.

When the last stroke of color was applied, there was a collective murmur of satisfaction from men gathered around. Jennet stood to display her arm proudly, and a cheer roared through the crowd. She turned to Angus and gravely thanked him for his work, shaking his hand warrior's fashion and impulsively kissing his cheek. I could swear I saw him blush, but he grinned at her and nodded. A few minutes of congratulations and I took my turn, asking Angus to touch up my own tattoo. He was pleased to do so, and in less than twenty minutes had it looking clean and sharp as if it had been applied only yesterday.

Carth, Ladria and the others had joined the crowd, talking quietly as Jennet received her warrior's mark, and gathered around when we were done. Mira bent over to examine it closely, smiling.

"That's incredible work," she said approvingly. "Would it be sacrilege to ask Angus to give me one sometime?"

"No," I said, smiling at her enthusiasm. "As long as it's not a clan badge. He mentioned that he would make a few credits on the side with his skills over the years."

"I'm not surprised that you would want a tattoo," Jennet said, laughing, "just that you don't have one already."

"Oh, I do," Mira said, cat smile on her face. "Just not where I'd show it here."

Dax grinned and patted her rear familiarly. "I've seen it," he said wickedly, and she elbowed him none too gently.

Atton was examining the tattoo, making noises of admiration. "Well," he said with a smirk, "we've lost you now. The Mandalorians have claimed you. It could be removed if you ever change your mind, you know."

"Fuck you, Rand," Jennet said sweetly. "You're just jealous they don't want you."

"Too breakable," I rumbled, giving Atton my smile that scares small children.

"Goes to show the Mandoa don't know a good thing when they see it," Atton said impudently. "They got it right with you, though," he added, giving Jennet a hug and a kiss on the cheek. "I never thought I'd be proud a friend of mine chose to become Mandalorian. You done good, kid."

"Thanks," Jennet said with a warm smile. She turned to me, kissed me soundly and complained, "I'm sticky, and hot, and want a shower. Coming?"

"Right with you," I promised.


	60. Chapter 60

**Jennet**

We were escorted back by Kelborn, Zuka, Kex and Tagren, who were carrying our armor. This was less thoughtful than it sounds; Canderous had unceremoniously dumped it on them as we left the battlefield. They didn't seem to mind much, and truthfully, mine isn't much of a burden. Canderous had the Helm tucked under one arm, his other hand holding me firmly around the waist. I think he was afraid I would pass out again. He wasn't far wrong.

Arriving at our quarters, Canderous placed the Helm on its stand and asked Kex and Zuka to clean and put away the armor. He sent Kelborn and Tagren to fetch some food and towed me into the bedroom. He might have helped me undress, but I shook him off and told him to attend himself; all the faster that I could get clean. He shrugged, stripped, and threw on a robe. I was in mine and following him to the most delicious shower of my life in minutes.

Jungles are hot and sticky to begin with. Fighting two battles in one day in full armor made me feel like I was coated with dried seawater. As the cool water poured over us, I felt much better. Now I was ferociously hungry. Fortunately, the food was there when we left the 'fresher, left on the nightstand along with some wine and a big jug of water. The honor guard understood my habits by now. I was finding that Mandalorians in general were a lot more observant and thoughtful than anyone outside their race gave them credit for.

We ate everything on the tray and the jug was empty in short order. I was starting to feel myself again, and was about to suggest making more personal use of our time before the feast, when I looked over and saw Canderous. He had been lounging against the headboard while we ate; now he was leaned back, fast asleep. I smiled ruefully, and did a quick scan. I'd been so drained myself I hadn't really checked how _he_ was, and felt ashamed. He'd been so concerned about me, but my check showed me he was nearly as spent. I quietly cleared away the remnants of our little picnic, placing the tray outside the door for one of the honor guard to take back to the mess hall. I saw Kelborn on duty by the outer door and he smiled at me through the dim light.

I closed the door, and called, "Make sure we're up in time for the feast, okay?"

Kelborn gave me a thumb's up, and I slipped back into our room. Canderous had moved; he was now sprawled across his half of the bed and most of mine. Smiling, I carefully eased onto the mattress, trying not to wake him. As soon as my weight hit, though, he rolled to his side and gathered me in, muttering something incoherent in my ear.

"Love you too, ti kar'ta," I whispered, and fell asleep myself.

We only got about an hour and a half nap, and I woke, disoriented and muzzy, with the buzzer that announces someone outside the door going off. Canderous was on his feet in an instant, sliding open the door. There was a brief exchange with whoever was there and he closed the door again.

"Kelborn?" I asked, glancing at the clock. 19:30. I had time to freshen up.

"Yeah," Canderous rumbled. "When did I fall asleep?"

"Right after we ate," I told him. "I'm sorry I was too wrapped up in my own fatigue to notice you were as bad off."

"I wasn't, Wildcat," he said, stretching out his back. "I'd checked, and I wasn't even close to as drained as you were. You know, the mass battle ecstasy isn't going to be an asset if it kills you, say, the third time it kicks in. I'm not sure it's worth the risk."

"It won't, and it is," I said firmly. "I just didn't know what to expect this time; I didn't maintain my energy level properly. Now that I've felt it, I can adjust. How were you the first time you felt its effects?"

"Once the battle was over, pretty whipped," he admitted. "It took a couple more fights to get used to it."

"There, you see? And you were tired after this one, because it involved not just your abilities, but mine. Next time will be much easier."

"I guess you're right," he said, leaning down for a kiss.

"You worry too much, ti kar'ta," I said, grinning.

"Nah, that's your job."

We got ready for the feast and managed to get there on schedule. If the republic and Mandalorian soldiers were fairly friendly yesterday, they were positively chummy today. I was delighted to see everyone talking and laughing and swapping stories. Lorna had outdone herself and the food was absolute ambrosia. Of course, the fact I was as hungry as a Ronto made everything taste fabulous. I split my time between being charming to our guests, keeping an eye on the serving staff, and eating everything in sight without looking like I was.

As we gathered at the bonfire after dinner, I watched the flames dance and shimmer, leaning against Canderous and thinking, for once, about absolutely nothing. The new tattoo itched a little, but I was grateful it didn't get scabby and ugly looking before it was fit to be seen. If it had, my healing might not have allowed me to keep it, or I would have had to scale it way back for a week, which is difficult to do in a camp where the primary entertainment is beating the shit out of each other. I supposed it would be okay if I was just healing others, but it's much more difficult for me _not_ to allow it to work on me than to hold it back.

I looked around the circle, and saw Ladria and Atton sitting not far away, chatting with Visas and Mira, who was leaning back against Dax. Dax wasn't participating much in the conversation that I could see, but he was idly toying with a lock of Mira's hair, and I could practically hear her purring from here. Bao Dur was sitting with Megari, Danni fast asleep on his lap, with Jenks and Zuka close by. I was amused; Zuka has the nastiest reputation next to Kex as far as temper goes, but he'd taken to Danni and was amazingly protective and gentle with her. He was also unfailingly polite and respectful to Megari. Besides Bao Dur and her mother, I'd seen Danni most often tag behind the gruff warrior, even allowing him to pick her up and carry her on his shoulders. Danni hadn't spoken again since her sudden break of silence to Carth the other day, at least not in front of me, and I hadn't had an opportunity to ask. I reminded myself to do that tomorrow.

Carth approached, and smiled down at Canderous and me. "This seat taken?"

"Depends," I said brightly. "Lt. Grant with you?"

Canderous snorted behind me.

Carth looked around in an exaggerated searching posture. "Don't see him."

"Then by all means sit," I invited.

"He's an eager young man," Carth said as he plunked down beside us. "A bit green, and a romantic. But a fine soldier for all that. He'll get over you," Carth said cheerfully.

"I'm more worried about him getting 'accidentally' thrown over the wall for the cannoks to munch on," I said dryly.

"Canderous wouldn't do that," Carth said, smiling.

"No," my Mate agreed, "But the honor guard might."

"I'll put a bug in his ear," Carth promised.

"Don't say that too loud," I laughed. "Someone might take that literally. There's some nasty ones around here."

"Good to know," the admiral grinned. "Just let me know if Lt. Grant is a pest."

"No, he's sweet," I said, "and it's flattering. I just worry about my overprotective bodyguards."

"How long have you been fighting, Miss Jax?" Carth asked, changing the subject.

"Since birth, practically," I answered. "I fought in my first battle ring at thirteen. Mom and I moved around a lot after Dad died, and she and I would fight to support ourselves. I took part in my first real battle when I was fifteen, helping some settlers fight off raiders on some godsforaken planet near the outer rim. I was seventeen when Mom started getting sick, so we settled on a little planet most people haven't heard of. But there was a Hutt, and a fight ring, so I kept up that way. When she died, I moved on."

"Amazing," Carth said sincerely. "I was all of seventeen when I enlisted, and greener than freshly cut wood. I was pretty good with a blaster though; I'd hunted growing up with my father and uncles on Telos. Learning hand-to-hand combat was fun, but grueling. I spent my whole time in basic training one big bruise."

"And you wonder why the Mandoa almost took the galaxy," Canderous rumbled, but without malice.

"Nope," Carth said seriously. "If it hadn't been for Revan and the other Jedi, you probably would have."

"So when does Mission arrive?" Canderous asked.

"Day after tomorrow," Carth said, smiling. "She's really excited about seeing you again."

"That's good," Canderous said noncommittally.

I could feel he was uncomfortable with this notion.

_You've spoken fondly of Mission, _I said silently.

_She was a good kid, _Canderous said with an inward smile. _Smart as hell, resourceful, and a pretty good fighter. I was fond of her, yeah. But I wasn't exactly the most liked person on board. I didn't care all that much. Mission was one that didn't seem to give a frak about my past at all. I'm just…_

_Just what?_

_It's strange, that's all…having my past collide with my present. I never thought I'd see any of these people again, let alone be glad to. A month ago I wouldn't have cared at all if Mission liked me or not._

_And now you do, _I said, understanding.

_Yeah._

_It's hard, caring, _I said sympathetically.

_Hell of a lot harder than battle._

_You got that right, _I agreed. _Why do you think I never cried but once after Jareth died? Or wrecked the apartment when Stefan left? Because I'd let myself care. I did a fair amount of protecting myself too. It's wonderful to be able to do that openly, now._

_But you had an advantage, Wildcat. You always did. I never have._

_Tell that to Gerda and your children, _I said tartly_. Or Jarxel. Or, for that matter, Revan._

He was silent then.

We had been listening to Carth proudly speaking of Mission and Dustil while having this conversation, and returned full attention back to the admiral.

"I can't wait to meet her," I said warmly. "Is Dustil coming too?"

"He might," Carth said. "He refuses to allow his Admiral father to pull strings, so it will depend on his class schedule."

"Well I hope he can make it," I smiled. "I understand they're getting married next year?"

"Yeah," Carth said, practically glowing with pride. "Makes me feel old."

"You think?" Canderous grumbled. "I'm marrying someone young enough to be my daughter."

"Yes, but maturity wise I have you beat," I said sweetly. "_I'm_ not the one that bickers with Atton and wants to throw Lt. Grant over the wall."

"It would take a more patient man than Carth here not to bicker with Atton," Canderous groused.

"I don't know," Carth said wickedly. "I rather like the man. I hear he's a good pilot."

"Even better than you," Canderous confirmed bluntly.

Carth shrugged, unoffended. "There's always someone out there better than yourself. I hold my own. So," he said, switching gears, "would starting treaty discussions tomorrow be okay with you?"

"Nothing on my schedule so far," Canderous said with a faint smile. "How about right after lunch?"

"Sounds good. I'll have my officers with me. Is there anyone that can take notes?"

"Ask Disciple," I said, grinning. "He lives for taking notes."

"Fair enough," Carth said, grinning back. "And we'll want Ladria there as well."

"And the Elders, and Jarxel," Canderous put in.

"And me," I said a little sharply.

"That goes without saying, Wildcat," Canderous said easily.

The dancing started then, and we all got up to join in. The rest of the night was a whirl of laughter and movement, drinking and camaraderie. By the time we got to bed, I was almost too tired to care about anything but sleep. But Canderous reached for me, and his heat gave me strength, and we made our own bonfire as the morning light stole over the camp.

The alliance council was unbelievably intricate and boring. I paid close attention at first, however, not wanting to seem uninterested, or for that matter unintelligent. Carth and Canderous hammered out details about the Mandoa contribution to the Republic; how many men, whose command they would be under, how much say Canderous himself would have in strategy meetings. In his own camp, Canderous was supreme commander in chief; with the Republic, his rank would be equal to Carth's, it was agreed, although he his title would remain Mandalore, not Admiral. The Republic would provide a warship and the unit would draw the same supplies as the rest of the military. Anyone inadequately armed or armored (this drew a snort from Jarxel) could avail themselves of Republic issue gear.

This being settled, the rest of the details remained almost meaningless to me until I caught my name. I looked up with a start, having been watching Disciple gleefully tapping away on his ubiquitous datapad, seemingly the only one truly delighted with his part in the proceedings. I snapped my attention to Carth, who was addressing me.

"For the record, Jennet, we need your full name – or what it will be after the wedding; no reason to have to go through the tedious paperwork of changing it, if need be."

"Jennet Adriadne Jax Ordo," I said, feeling warm with the thought of that name. Canderous rumbled approval in my head.

"Adriadne?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

"A family name," I said, shrugging.

"And yours, Mandalore," Carth prompted.

"Canderous Calder Ordo," he rumbled.

"I thought Calder was your brother's name," I said with surprise.

"It was; my father was named Canderous Calder Cardus Ordo." He said, shrugging. "I was eldest, and got the first two names, my brother got the second two. As there were no more sons, I named my eldest Cardus."

"And your mother?" I asked, curious.

"Helen Cartha Darr Ordo."

"Pretty," I said, nodding.

"You have a brother?" Carth asked with interest. "And a son?"

"Had," Canderous said shortly.

"Oh," Carth said, looking away. "Sorry."

"Don't be," Canderous said. "I'll tell you someday."

"Well, Mandalore, General Ordo, I think that about wraps it up for today. We can continue with the Republic aid tomorrow, if that's agreeable," Carth said cheerfully.

"General Ordo?!" I yelped.

"You're my second, Wildcat," Canderous said, puzzled at my reaction.

"Jarxel's your XO," I pointed out.

"No, my Lady, I'm the Mandalore and the Lady's XO," Jarxel said seriously. "Command structure is Mandalore, you, me, Kelborn, and so on down the line. That makes you a general."

"Nobody told me this," I said, trying not to panic. "I don't know the first thing about being a general. I'm just there to support Canderous and the men."

Jarxel, unbelievably, started to laugh in great gulping gusts of merriment. Canderous laughed too, although less uproariously, Carth followed suit, and even Ladria was smiling widely.

"What the hell is so funny?" I snarled, completely put out by all the humor at apparently my expense.

"The first thing about being a general," Ladria said gently, still smiling, "is knowing how to lead. You've got that one down cold, I'd say. The rest will follow, trust me."

"But," I protested, "I've never led an army before, and I won't be doing that now. I don't know the first thing about strategy or supplies or….well, anything about being in an army, dammit!"

"Wildcat, you've proven time and again you can make tough decisions, stick to them, and see them through, even in the face of disapproval," Canderous rumbled, still chuckling. "The men will follow anywhere you lead, even into hell itself. Now, you're right, it'll be me making most of those calls, but you'll be backing me up, and making it happen. And if something happens to me, I can't think of anyone that would do a better job of seeing things through than you, or getting the men home."

Jarxel was grinning, nodding at Canderous' little speech. "It's true, Lady. You can, and you would."

"I…" I stopped, swallowing. I could feel Canderous' absolute sincerity, and understood the magnitude of the trust he and Jarxel were showing me. "I'd do that, sure," I said gruffly. "But I don't need a rank for that."

"Um, actually, yes you do," Carth said almost apologetically. "Rank structure is necessary for an army to be effective, and for other units to efficiently communicate and function with each other. Making your rank General ensures that other officers and enlisted know who is in charge. You're Canderous' voice when he's not available - that needs to be made clear. You two are unusual; you'll be functioning basically as joint leaders, but with Canderous having the overall authority."

"Okay, I see that it's necessary." I said slowly. "I just never thought of myself as a general before."

"Welcome to the club," Carth said ruefully.


	61. Chapter 61

Author's note: Thanks everyone for the feedback so far! I'm afraid the action has slowed down a bit, but don't worry, we still have the wedding battles to go. Just six more days til the wedding!

As always, please read and review, if so inclined.

Always, LJ

* * *

The next day was slightly more interesting, for me at least, but they did drag on. Carth and Canderous did most of the talking, and it was almost like watching bartering in a market square. Eight straight hours of logistics and supplies and training schedules and they finally hammered out a workable plan. Clearing the jungle and building the community would begin in a month, with the first exodus to Dxun following in four. Canderous and Jarxel would begin selecting and training troops then, (or as Jarxel put it, whipping their sorry asses into remembering what it was to be an army again) while the remaining Mandoa would assist Republic engineers with finishing construction, under Bao Dur's direction. Second wave will be brought three months after that. If all went well, all the known Mandoa will be moved to Dxun in eight months. The Mandalore will leave with his troops in nine months, to serve for a duration of at least one year.

We broke it off for the day, agreeing to meet yet again tomorrow to refine details on both agreements. I felt wrung out; I could feel Canderous did too, although both he and Carth looked perfectly relaxed. Carth strode off to borrow the shuttle to pick up Mission from Onderon. I headed off to go workout, Canderous and Jarxel with me, and to meditate after.

I'd gotten up early this morning to lead another class and had promised another tomorrow. Carth was continuing to join these classes and was improving impressively. I had scanned him a couple of days ago and found that he was extraordinarily Force sensitive for not being Jedi; possibly strong enough to be trained. I debated talking to him about it, but figured Revan had probably told him at some point; he didn't need any advice from me. The rest of the class were also doing well and I was proud of their progress.

The last two days in camp, outside the negotiations, had been spent with the Mandalorians and Republic soldiers drilling with and against each other, Kelborn leading our men, Quarn leading his. Kelborn reported that there was a lot of enthusiasm between the two groups, and the energy dampeners were invaluable for practice without causing permanent injury. Canderous was pleased to note the progress, as was I. Armies have a very efficient rumor mill, according to Canderous, and these soldiers' endorsement will make it all the easier for us to integrate when the time comes.

Continuing negotiations were scheduled for the next morning, breaking off early afternoon. Canderous and I had finished working out, and he headed off to take Kelborn's report of the day's activities. With tomorrow's schedule in mind, I went looking for Atton.

I found him in the mess hall, playing Pazzak with a poor unsuspecting Republic soldier. I didn't care for the game, as I've said, but I had enough unwanted strategy in my head about it to know that Atton was good enough to go professional if he wanted to. I hoped the man he was playing knew his limits.

Waiting politely for the game to end, Atton caught my eye and gave a small nod of acknowledgement. I nodded back. In short order, the soldier sighed, tossed Atton's winnings at him and left. Atton turned to me, grinning.

"That was a good match," he said conversationally. "And don't worry; I didn't clean the guy out."

"Glad to hear it," I said cheerfully. "Got a minute?"

"For you, always," Atton said with a wink. "I'm thinking you want to give Canderous his wedding gift tomorrow."

"How did you know?" I asked, surprised.

"There's a reason you don't like Pazzak," he said, smiling wider. "What you think is usually on your face."

"I can keep secrets," I protested.

"Sure, when it matters," Atton said easily. "But you don't naturally hide what's on your mind, unlike us sneakier types. On the other hand, you've hidden that you're Force sensitive your whole life, so you've got more than a nodding acquaintance with deception. Makes things interesting when someone's trying to get a handle. But here," he waved, encompassing the camp in general, "you're at home, where you don't need to hide. So it's easier to read you."

"You're an astute observer," I said admiringly.

"I watch," Atton said simply. "And listen. So, you want me to go fetch the Phoenix, yes?"

"Yeah," I said, grinning. "But I don't have the slightest clue where to park her, since the Ebon Hawk is in the hanger, the transport is where it usually sits, and the shuttles are outside the main gates."

"The battlefield is big enough," Atton pointed out. "I can fetch her from the docks, and orbit until you comm me. The only drawback is I don't get to see Canderous' face when I bring her in."

"That's regrettable," I agreed. "But it'd be so much more dramatic if I haul him over there, wondering what the hell is up, and she lands in front of him."

"A woman after my own heart," Atton grinned. "Canderous doesn't like surprises much. This will be fun."

"Oh, come on, he does too," I protested. "Just not ones that involve getting him, me, or his men killed."

"Well, he is marrying _you_," Atton said judiciously. "That does tend to support the idea that he doesn't mind the odd surprise."

"Gee, thanks," I said sardonically.

"What time would you like to spring this on him?" he asked.

"Well, there's another meeting in the morning, but we've all agreed to knock off early; if there's anything left to work out, we'll have another one the next day. So I'm thinking 1400," I said thoughtfully. "It'll give us time to have lunch, or if the meeting runs a little long, Lorna will feed us during."

"How are the negotiations going?" Atton asked curiously.

"Well enough," I said. "Apparently I'm a general now. Or will be, I guess."

He whistled through his teeth. "I can't say I'm all that surprised."

"You, too?" I said dryly. "No one is surprised but me, it seems."

"That's the nice thing about you, kid," he said, nudging my elbow with his. "You really don't see yourself that way. Refreshing. Most of us have a way overblown idea of our own importance."

"And you'd know nothing about that," I teased, nudging back.

"No," he said, suddenly serious. I saw a shadow in his eyes, for just a nanosecond. He blinked, and I was left wondering if it had really been there. "I know just how unimportant I am."

He was cheerful again, and we sorted out details of my surprise for tomorrow. He promised to ask Bao Dur if he wanted to tag along with Megari and Danni, and I agreed I'd drag Canderous to the battlefield at the appropriate time. I had an idea for that, and took Tagren, who had been tagging after, er, guarding me with Dax, aside after I had left Atton. I gave him instructions for the next day, and he grinned widely.

"Absolutely, my Lady," he said almost gleefully. "It's worth the pounding I get for the look on his face. He hates surprises, you know."

"I'll take the hit," I promised, smiling. "He can't blame you for following orders, can he?"

"Watch him," Tagren said dryly.

"So, out of curiosity, who in camp _doesn't_ know what I'm giving Canderous for a wedding gift?" I asked, thinking of the military rumor mill.

"With luck, the Mandalore," Dax answered promptly. "I'm pretty sure everyone else does."

"Do you think he already knows?" I asked suspiciously.

"We've all tried hard not to let on, Lady," Dax assured me. "And he hasn't asked anyone, as far as I know. I think he realizes you want to surprise him."

"Good," I said, relieved. Then I thought of something. "Does everyone know what he's giving me?"

"That, my Lady," Tagren said seriously, "is _not_ worth the pounding I'll get."

"I'm not asking what it is," I said, laughing. "But you answered my question."

My bodyguards grinned back, but I could see their relief that I wasn't going to press the issue. As we turned to head back toward my quarters, I saw Canderous striding toward me.

"There you are," he said with some asperity. "Mission should be here any minute."

"Oh hell, I'd forgotten," I said apologetically. "Sorry."

"It's all right, Wildcat, we have time I think," Canderous rumbled. "Carth commed a few minutes ago that he was landing soon."

We hurried to the main gates, Dax and Tagren on our heels. The rest of the honor guard were assembled already, and we took our places. I saw Ladria, Disciple, Atton, and Mira there as well. As I looked around, I saw Bao Dur with his twin shadows of Megari and Danni strolling up, Visas not far behind, talking to Jarxel, who split off with a friendly gesture as he approached us. Visas drifted over to Ladria, and the two women chatted quietly, Atton nodding with them.

The gates opened, and a young Twi'lik woman walked in, arm and arm with Carth on one side and a young man who looked remarkably like him on the other; I assumed this was Dustil. A little behind these three was an older dark skinned man in Jedi robes, 'saber at his side, and with him a young Jedi woman, not much older than me, with a cool expression and straight-backed, just short of arrogant stature. I felt Canderous stiffen slightly.

_Who is that?_ I asked silently as the group approached.

Before he could answer me, Mission squealed loudly and launched herself at Canderous, who caught her by reflex and suffered an enthusiastic hug and loud kiss on the cheek.

"Canderous!" she said with irresistible enthusiasm. "It's soooooo good to see you! And you're the Mandalore now, just like Revan said you'd be," she gushed.

Canderous managed to pry her gently off and sat her back from him to look her over. "Mission," he rumbled. "You're all grown up. You look good, kid. I hear you're getting married," he added with a nod at Carth's son. He offered a hand to him. "Dustil, thanks for coming."

Dustil shook it with a smile and his father's easy charm. "Wouldn't miss it. You saved my ass back on Korriban."

"It seemed to be worth saving," Canderous grinned.

Mission turned her considerable charm and enthusiasm on me. "You must be Jennet," she said warmly, and to my surprise hugged me. I hugged her back, enchanted. "Dad has said so much about you I feel like I know you already. Is it true you killed a Hutt? And survived being on both the Exchange and the Hutt's hit list? How did you meet Canderous? I bet it wasn't romantic. Are you really his Mate?"

"Um," I said, not sure what to answer first. "Yes, yes, in a cantina after I killed about a dozen mercs, well, actually in an alley after I woke up, so no it wasn't, and yes. And welcome, I've been looking forward to meeting you."

Canderous, Carth, and Dustil looked from me to Mission, exchanged significant looks and collectively shrugged.

"Gods," Jarxel interjected with feeling. "There's two of them. Does she fight too?"

Mission and I looked at each other and started to giggle.

"Only if I have to," Mission said brightly. "But give me a computer and I'll make it cry for mercy."

"You must be Dustil," I said, smiling at Carth's son. "I'm so glad you could make it."

"Thank you for inviting me," Dustil said warmly. "Glad to be here." He kissed my hand instead of shaking it, and I was impressed with his manners.

"Welcome to Dxun," I said.

The other two guests were now in front of us, and I turned my attention to them.

"Jolee," Canderous said as he shook the man's hand firmly. "It's been a while. Good to see you."

"Wouldn't miss it," Jolee said, a hint of laughter in his voice. "I got as far as Onderon and was going to comm you to see if someone could shuttle me down, and ran into Mission and Dustil, here. So I hitched a ride with Carth. Quite a moon you have here, reminds me of Kashyyk."

"It's brighter, but yeah," Canderous agreed. "Not so many millennia old trees around, but the wildlife is about as friendly."

Jolee laughed delightedly. "Trust you to find a place to live that wants to kill you."

Canderous gave a grimace that passed as a smile and turned to me. "Wildcat, this is Jolee Bindo. If he gives you any lip, challenge him to a duel in the fight ring. He won't need a weapon. He'll just talk you to death; so you two ought to get along fine."

Jolee turned to me, his eyes warm and friendly. "Don't listen to him; he just didn't get enough hugs as a child. I'm impressed that someone as pretty and bright as you wants to marry this big grumbler." He clasped my hand between both his own and bowed. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Miss Jax."

"Please," I said, liking this man immediately. "It's Jennet, and the pleasure's mine."

"Anyone that can understand Missionspeak has my admiration," Jolee said with a grin.

"Hey!" Mission protested, laughing.

The last guest had been watching the reunions with a remote expression, patiently waiting her turn. I had caught from Canderous by now who she was, so I was unsurprised when he turned to her with a formal air, and rumbled, "Bastila." He inclined his head and offered his hand. Somewhat to my surprise, she took it.

"Canderous," she said, just as formal.

"Welcome to Dxun," Canderous said politely enough. "Carth said you weren't going to come."

"I wasn't," she said stiffly. "But I admit I was curious to meet Jennet, and the Exile. And I thought it would be agreeable to reacquaint myself with old friends."

"Her name," I said, carefully calm, "is Ladria."

"Excuse me?" Bastila said, turning to me with a puzzled frown.

"She is not the Exile," I said through a gritted smile. "Her name is Ladria Windbreak. Master Ladria, to you. And I," I added sweetly, "am neither an idiot, nor a saint. Sorry to disappoint you."

"I…" there was a crack in the cool façade, and she caught herself. She drew herself up, and bowed to me formally. "I spoke without thought, and apologize. It is a failing of mine. I meant no insult."

Ladria, who had been watching quietly nearby, moved smoothly forward. "Bastila Shan," she said in her honey and steel voice, "It is an honor to meet you."

"And you, Master Ladria," Bastila bowed stiffly.

"Perhaps we can talk sometime about your mission with Canderous," Ladria said warmly. "Among other things."

"I would like that," Bastila said sincerely, unbending a little. She turned to me, her face a polite mask. "Thank you for the invitation. Congratulations on your upcoming marriage."

"Thank you," I said, equally polite. "Welcome to Dxun; I hope you enjoy your stay."

_That woman, _I said scathingly to Canderous, _makes Zuka look like a friendly Gizka._

_You get used to her, _he chuckled back.

_I'm not sure if I should be relieved or frightened by that._

Formal greetings accomplished, we broke up the gathering by announcing dinner. Canderous and I led the way, the rest of the party chatting behind us. Mission slipped her arm through mine, firing a thousand questions a minute at me, which I laughingly tried to answer as I sorted them out.

The Twi'lik leaned closer and said in a conspiratorial whisper, "Don't mind Bastila; she always did have a 'saber up her ass. She's all right once she gets to know you."

I managed to halt my burst of laughter to a low snigger. "Not once I get to know _her_?"

"She was worse than Canderous about that, in some ways," Mission murmured. "At least with him, you knew what he thought if you asked him. I pestered him to death back then; it's a wonder he didn't shove me out an airlock," she said with surprising insight and honesty. "But he wasn't _mean_, you know. He pretended he was, but I knew that he really wasn't. Bastila wasn't mean either, but so…well, I guess, _prickly_…and kind of formal you didn't know what was under it, or what she really thought. But she's all right, really."

"I'll take your word for it," I said dryly.


	62. Chapter 62

**Canderous**

That evening was one of the most enjoyable I had spent in a long time. Jennet instantly bonded with Jolee, and liked Dustil enormously almost on sight. I had to admit that Carth's son was a likeable fellow. He'd learned some hard lessons at the hands of the Sith, and had a maturity about him that was similar to one of my own race at that age. We learn through trial by fire; most Mandalorian men in their early twenties have been in and out of combat for a decade. While Dustil lacked quite that level of experience, there was an underlying seriousness about him that balanced natural youthful enthusiasm.

Mission, however…she and Jennet seemed sisters on sight, and I smiled to see it. The young Twi'lik was a few years Jennet's junior but had been self sufficient and streetwise at fourteen, when I had met her. Jennet hadn't had to live as hard as Mission, but had been holding her own in battle rings from a young age. Yet neither of them had grown hard or cynical. They both had a gift for mangling languages, too. I enjoyed watching the two of them chatter away, cheerfully making observations and swapping stories.

And, I admitted to myself, neither of them had ever judged me by what I had been; only what I was now. Or in Mission's case, then _and_ now. For some reason, I found this…refreshing. I wasn't willing to amend that to comforting.

The one bit of sawdust in the gears was Bastila. Jennet disliked her from the start, which is unusual for her, and Bastila seemed to return the favor. While unfailingly polite to each other, the tension was thick enough to be cut with a vibroblade. I was amused at some of the comments Jennet shared silently with me.

_You know, I kind of wish she'd stayed evil. At least I wouldn't feel guilty for wanting to strangle her. Does she have any sense of humor at all?_

_It's there, _I said honestly, stifling a chuckle that threatened to break free.

_Yeah, well, if so it's buried so far up her ass it requires surgery to find._

_Not that I'm defending her, Wildcat, but why do you dislike her so much? You hardly know her._

_I didn't like her calling Ladria 'th_e _Exile' like she wasn't a real person. Fer gods' sake, Bastila actually was _helping _Malak for a while; Ladria at least turned back after she knew he'd gone over. What right does _she_ have to judge Ladria?_

_She wasn't; she was just referring to Ladria the way the other Jedi did. Like I say jetti; it isn't an insult, really, just a designation._

_And you're defending her…why? She doesn't like you any more than she likes me._

_I told you I wasn't, and I'm not. But I have seen her at her best and worst. She isn't so bad, once you get past the hard shell. I never did, not that I tried or cared enough to, but I saw her with Revan and Carth and the others._

_Well, I believe you…I guess. But I still say she has all the approachability of a rampaging ronto._

_On that, I agree._

_So can I accidentally throw her to the cannoks? _Jennet said hopefully.

_Better not…at least not until the treaty is signed, _I chuckled back.

The bonfire that night didn't last as long as usual; almost everyone was tired, either from ongoing negotiations, drilling, or travel. But we managed a respectable evening of it, heading to bed just before midnight.

Negotiations the next morning were simply a polishing of the terms we'd come to. Jennet has a mind like a sponge, soaking up information, but occasionally gets overloaded when she's unfamiliar with the subject. The treaty talks were hitting her data limit, although she did a fine job of paying attention and contributing. She also had something else on her mind, just under the surface thoughts, that I didn't probe into, being busy with the discussion at hand, and respecting her privacy. I'd noticed that there was nothing important to her so far that she didn't get around to telling me.

Bastila had joined the talks at Carth's and Ladria's invitation. As one of the surviving Jedi, her rank within the Order was at the moment unclear; however, she had enjoyed some influence with the previous Council. Ladria, on the other hand, was even murkier in some ways. Redeemed wasn't quite the word for her. She had reestablished her connection to the Force, and was now more powerful than most remaining Jedi that we knew of. She had also been a Master long before Bastila, from what I could pick up between the lines and with Jennet's help on Jedi rank structure. Bastila was not being hostile toward Ladria, and Ladria was being perfectly pleasant and friendly. But there was some tension; any warrior could sense that a room away.

Carth quickly recapped the agreements so far, primarily for Bastila's benefit. When we got to rank, she broke in incredulously.

"You're making a woman with no leadership experience a general?" she asked sharply. "Is that wise?"

Jarxel growled softly next to me, and I more felt than saw the honor guard stiffen behind us. Jennet opened her mouth to reply, but I flashed her mentally and she closed it. It was Carth that answered Bastila.

"Jennet is the second highest rank of the Mandoa, a gifted leader, and an accomplished warrior. This is an alliance, not a recruitment; we acknowledge the rank held within our ally's military structure," he said politely enough, but with a touch of steel.

Bastila, intent on her point, didn't hear the warning. Nice to know some things never change.

"I understand that," she said dismissively, "but I am concerned that to put an untried leader in a position of such authority may ultimately cost lives. This alliance with the Mandoa has enough unknown variables."

I felt Jennet start to leap to her feet in fury, but I stopped her with a hand on her arm. She subsided slightly, glowering at Bastila.

"Would you care," I said, low and dangerous, "to explain that?"

"Simply that the assimilation of Mandoa and Republic troops will likely be an uneasy coexistence, and the addition of a leader with unknown skills won't help the situation," Bastila said seriously, completely oblivious to the rising hostility.

"Jennet," I said carefully, "is the best natural leader I've seen since Revan and Ladria. Secondly, it is the Mandoa rank structure that counts here, and she most definitely is second in command. Third, you are not part of these discussions; you are here by invitation and have no authority or say. Shut up, or get out."

"How dare you speak to me like that?" Bastila said hotly. "You always did have the manners of a schoolyard bully."

"And you have the sensitivity and tact of a spoiled child," Jennet snarled, leaping to her feet. "You don't know me, so I can forgive your concerns about my qualifications. But if this is an example of _your_ leadership ability, I am seriously questioning _yours._ This is not your call. Furthermore, if you continue to insult the Mandalore or our people, you will not be welcome in this camp, and I will have a clause entered into the treaty that you will not be allowed on board our ship without specific invitation from the Mandalore or me. And if you are lucky enough to be granted access, it will be with full escort."

"You would take such actions over a petty disagreement?" Bastila asked scornfully.

"I would protect the morale of my troops and the safety of one who is currently my responsibility, whether wanted or no," Jennet snapped. "You are dangerously close to being challenged on several levels. Care to face the whole camp in the battle ring, one at a time?"

"You wouldn't allow that," Bastila said, less confidently, but still looking down her nose.

"So you admit I have that sort of authority over my men?" Jennet said with a nasty smile. "Good of you. Now watch your mouth or I will have that clause written in. Full escort means even 'fresher breaks. And we're a bit short on female warriors right now."

"You wouldn't," Bastila snapped.

"Try me," Jennet snapped back.

"I'd write it in," Carth said calmly, and everyone turned to the admiral. "Bastila, you are a talented Jedi and intelligent woman, but Jennet's right: your leadership skills are lacking, and always have. I appreciate input, but if you continue to antagonize our potential ally, I will have you removed."

Bastila sat very still, face going blank. She appeared to be struggling with something, and took a few slow, deep breaths. Exhaling a third time, she turned to me and Jennet, and very carefully, but sincerely, spoke.

"I apologize for my comments. They were not meant to be insulting, but I can see that they were insensitive. I spoke out of turn," She said quietly.

There was a moment of silence where I almost thought Jennet was going to tell Bastila to go to hell, treaty or no. It was in her thoughts, and truthfully, I almost told her to do it; I was almost as angry as she was. But practicality won out, and I heard her silently reigning in her temper.

With admiral dignity and exquisite politeness she answered. "Accepted." She paused and said quietly, "Thank you."

The rest of the meeting went smoothly enough, and we left the mess hall after lunch, both sides reasonably satisfied with the arrangements. Tomorrow we would sign off on the agreement, and transmit the data to the Senate.

It was about five minutes to two as we headed into the main camp, and I saw Tagren hurrying to intercept me.

"Mandalore," he said seriously, "There's a situation on the battlefield. I think you better get there quick."

"What's the problem?" I growled, wondering which warrior did some damn fool thing to antagonize a Republic soldier.

"It would be better if you just hurry," Tagren said.

"Did Zuka or Kex piss off Sgt. Quarn?" I asked Tagren in an undertone as we all hustled to the new battlefield.

"Not exactly," Tagren hedged, and I gave him a sharp look.

"You know," I said in my dangerously calm voice, "it's a lot easier to do damage control if I know what the situation is."

"It's…complicated." Tagren said, not looking at me. "Better just get there. Take too long to explain anyway."

We arrived, and as far as I could see, everything was fine. Most of the warriors from both sides were hanging around, talking and sipping water and stripping off armor. I spotted Zuka and Kex standing with a clump of fellow soldiers, apparently peaceably bragging about something or other. I searched quickly for other known troublemakers and found nothing out of the ordinary.

Exasperated, I turned to Tagren. "What the hell is going on? I don't see anything that requires my attention."

"There, Sir," he said, and pointed up.

I looked, and saw a dark shape approaching the battlefield, which quickly resolved itself into an unknown ship, obviously intending to land. Jennet, who had lagged behind somewhat, caught up and followed my gaze.

"Shit," I said under my breath. "Jarxel," I barked, "full alert; we've got incoming."

"I don't think so, Mandalore," Jarxel said, grinning.

"What, am I hallucinating?" I growled. "Unknown ship approaching; call alert."

"Belay that," Jennet said, her grin matching Jarxel's. "I know who it is."

"Someone want to explain what the fuck is going on here?" I snarled.

"Just trust me," Jennet said softly.

She was blocking me firmly but I had a sudden insight: the shopping trip on Onderon, when she was looking for a wedding gift. This must be the delivery of whatever she had found. I wondered what in the galaxy she had bought that would require a ship that large to bring it. My irritation evaporated and I waited with the others as the ship approached, shading my eyes from the afternoon sun. Glancing around, I noticed everyone watching expectantly, many casting sideways glances at me and grinning. Whatever it was, people obviously expected me to like it.

Tagren was still near me and I shouted over the noise of engines "Jennet put you up to that little stunt?"

"Yes, Sir," he yelled back, grinning all over his face.

"Remind me to beat you later," I growled good-naturedly.

"That's what I told her, Mandalore," he replied, not the least repentant.

The cruiser landed, creating a backlash of wind, sending loose bits of grass and dust flying everywhere, and threatening to knock anyone too close off their feet. There was a reflexive backtracking from many of the spectators, and when the hatch opened, Jennet and I were at the head of the crowd. To my surprise, Atton, Bao Dur, Megari and Danni exited, all with proud happy smiles on their faces. Well, Atton was more like smirking, and Danni as usual was rather grave, but the air of expectation was evident. I approached the ship, Jennet by my side, with Atton and the others meeting us a few paces from the hatch.

"Mandalore," Atton said formally, struggling to contain what suspiciously looked like a smug grin, "allow me to present the Falcon class private cruiser Soul of the Phoenix, a wedding gift from your Mate."

I blinked at him, completely taken by surprise. Atton stood there, grinning, his hand outstretched. I automatically took it, then shook Bao Dur's, who smiled with quiet pride and presented Megari.

"Megari was an invaluable help getting the Phoenix ready," the Iridonian said in his soft voice. "She was in excellent condition, but we've made some modifications that greatly improve her performance."

"Thank you," I said to all three, giving Megari a smile and managing to find my voice. "This is incredible."

Jennet was practically vibrating next to me, outwardly calm, if smiling hugely, but I felt her anxiety under it. The magnitude of this gift hit me full on and I turned to my Mate, grinning and astonished.

"Holy shit, Wildcat," I blurted, a huge smile breaking over my face, "you got me a _Falcon_?" Then something else registered. "And you named her the Soul of the Phoenix?"

"Well, no," Jennet said modestly, but I felt the tension ease out of her, relief and elation replacing it as she felt my delight. "She's used, and that was her name to begin with. But yeah, she's a Falcon. Atton and Bao Dur, and, well, everyone I guess, have told me it's a good class of ship."

"Serious understatement there, cyar'ika," I said, unable to stop smiling. "It's the best there is. They're all built to order, so they're rare. Hell, Davik wanted one badly, but had to settle for a Hawk; it was going to take too much time and too many credits to order a Falcon. Who the hell let this girl go?"

"As to that," Atton broke in, "I did some checking, and the original owner was an Ondorian noble who died about two weeks ago. Not on board, I'm happy to say. He apparently was a bit of a spendthrift and his family sold off everything of value they could to pay his debts. His widow hates traveling, and she was glad to get rid of her. Jennet really lucked out; it had been on the lot only a couple of days."

"So you like it?" Jennet asked, hand on my arm.

In response, I jerked her clean off her feet and kissed her senseless. I set her back down, her face flushed and a little dazed.

"_Like_ it? That," I informed her, "is like saying I'm 'rather fond' of_ you_, Wildcat. Now everyone get out of my way; I want to inspect my ship."

I kept my dignity while looking the Phoenix over, but only just. I wanted to rub my hands together and cackle with glee. I was deeply grateful that the only one that suspected this was Jennet. I wasn't going to spoil her moment by blocking her, so I let her witness my utter delight over every detail of the Falcon. To everyone else, I hoped, I was merely extremely pleased and appreciative. The group that followed us on board was the Ebon Hawk crew, the honor guard, Carth, Mission, Dustil, Jolee, and, surprisingly, Bastila. It might have been a tight fit if everyone was grouped in the common area, but they all spread out in little groups, inspecting the cabins, cargo hold, garage, and so on. Bao Dur, Atton, and Jennet stayed with me, with the Iridonian explaining the mechanical modifications and Atton enthusiastically crowing about her maneuverability and armament. Jennet was, surprisingly, mostly silent, simply basking in my verbal and silent appreciation.

"I upgraded her jamming system so that she can block just about any transmission. While we were on the Ravager, I downloaded as much information as I could on Sith codes, transmission frequencies, and so on," Bao Dur was saying.

I nodded, remembering that he had turned that information over to Lt. Grenn just before we'd left Telos, who had promised to get the data to the Republic. I hadn't realized Bao Dur had kept a copy, though it didn't surprise me.

"I've had some time since then to analyze the data, and had an idea a while ago of creating a program that hides in the jamming frequency and extracts data from the computer of its target. It will simultaneously download the contents of the databank as it jams, completely undetected. I've been working on it off and on for nearly a year. I tested it against the Ebon Hawk while you were negotiating with Admiral Onasi. Works beautifully; I installed it on both ships. I was going to talk to the admiral about using it in Republic warships," he finished with quiet pride.

I whistled. "That is an incredibly simple and brilliant idea. It will be instrumental in aiding the Republic. I don't suppose you've considered it's extremely valuable as well?"

"Well, I'm not stupid," Bao Dur said with a grin. "I've considered that, yes. But I couldn't withhold this sort of information on the basis of personal gain. Plus, I'm uncertain of my standing now as Jedi; I had no clue if it's acceptable for me to profit from something like this."

A year ago I'd have told him to hell with noble purpose; he invented a valuable commodity and deserved to be compensated. But I'd learned a lot since then, and understood better his hesitation.

"Talk it over with Ladria," I said, nodding. "And Carth. They'll steer you in the right direction."

"I talked to the General," Bao Dur said. "She's of the opinion that compensation isn't out of bounds. We'll talk to Admiral Onasi together some time soon. This was the first test; it might require modification for restricted systems. But I know I can make it work. The data collected from the Ravager was invaluable in helping me perfect my program. Anyway, I thought that having the system might be useful; I figured you'd take the Phoenix with you when you join the Republic forces."

"It very well might," I agreed. "Especially if we can download it into whatever ship the Republic gives us. Thank you."

"I like to look out for my friends," the Zabrak said, shrugging. "I fine tuned the gun turrets and maximized engine efficiency as well. She's a beautiful girl, Canderous, and she'll be good to you."

I put my arm around Jennet and hugged her close to my side, kissing her forehead. "That she is," I agreed, gazing around the ship. Then I looked at Jennet, and smiled. "Yes she will. Thank you for all you've done."

"It was a pleasure," Bao Dur said, smiling widely. "But I didn't find her; Jennet and Atton did that. I would have paid good credits for a chance to tinker with a Falcon."

"Thanks, Atton," I said gruffly, and shook his hand. "I have no idea how you found her, but thanks."

"Ah, no problem," Atton said, grinning. "The look on your face when I came out of the ship was worth it. And Jennet was anxious to find the best she could for you. It was fun helping."

"I can't imagine it was all that fun for you, Wildcat," I said, marveling at the effort she'd made. "I don't believe you care overmuch about ships."

"I don't," she admitted, smiling. "But it seemed a good idea, and I had excellent help."

"She's beautiful, cyar'ika," I said softly, kissing her briefly but thoroughly. "And she carries your name; how perfect is that?"

Jennet looked startled. "When Atton told me what a find she was, and the salesman told me the name, I knew she was what I was looking for. But I thought of the Mandoa, rising from the ashes of their culture, becoming strong again. And you leading them; their center. Not me."

"The Lady of the Mandoa is what you are; the spirit of my people. And you wear the badge of the Ordo clan – a phoenix. The soul of the phoenix – mine," I said, and had the satisfaction of seeing her tear up. That's a perfect indicator I've said something right.

Wordless, she held me tight until she got her face under control. Bao Dur gave me smile over her head, and Atton, strangely, said nothing at all.

I could have spent hours going over every inch of the Phoenix, but settled for a lengthy tour, with Bao Dur leading us around, pointing out improvements. Atton chimed in from time to time, and Jennet, smiling nonstop, pointed out the comfort level when we have a full crew; two cabins, eight bunks, plus room for more sleep space in the engine room, cargo hold, infirmary, and garage. Even the common area could convert to sleeping space, and the seats in the cockpit not only lay flat if needed, but were surprisingly comfortable when horizontal. All in all, we could sleep as many as thirty people, more if it was a short trip. With its guns and jamming upgrade, it could be used as an effective small party raiding ship if the need arose.

When not on campaign, it would be very comfortable for traveling with the honor guard; enough bed space for everyone, privacy for me and Jennet, an extra cabin for the senior officer, enough 'freshers to go around. Plus, the galley was top-notch, efficient and ample storage for foodstuffs.

_This is perfect for traveling with children, _I said silently, partly to see Jennet blush, but also because it was true.

She did get a little rosy, but answered readily enough, _I thought of that too. It's a good ship for family travel, I think. _

_I've been remiss, Wildcat, _I said silently. _I've thanked everyone but you._

_You did already, _she assured me. _When you called me your soul._

"Cyar'ika," I said seriously as we started to disembark, "this is the second best gift I've ever gotten. Thank you." I leaned over to kiss her, but she stopped me with a hand to my chest.

"Second?" she asked, eyes narrowing.

"I got my best gift when you woke up in that ally," I said, grinning, "and agreed to come with me to the Ebon Hawk."

"Oh," she said, her voice small. "Well, that's okay then."

She let me kiss her then, and returned it with enthusiasm. We were interrupted with Atton making 'get a room' noises, and we laughed.

We left a guard stationed outside the Phoenix, but left the hatch open so the camp could tour her. Apparently, everyone had known what Jennet was planning, and were eager to take a look. People were already filing in as we strode away. I couldn't help but look back at her as we headed back toward the main camp.

Everyone was pleased with my reaction to the Phoenix, and Carth, who had been let in on the secret a couple of days ago, expressed his envy.

"You're a lucky bastard," he said frankly, smiling. "I'm not bad off, but I couldn't afford a Falcon. I have a Hawk on board the Eternity, and she's a fine ship, but I'd trade her in for yours any day."

"Not a chance, Onasi," I said, grinning. "Save up for your own."

"Take Atton with you," Jennet said helpfully. "He has a knack for finding ships."

"Just identifying them," Atton said cheerfully. "I'm pretty sure you were the good luck charm."

"Good point," Carth said thoughtfully. "Can I borrow your wife when I shop for a new ship, Canderous?"

"Sure," I said gravely. "Right after I become a Jedi."

"Guess that'll be about when it snows on Tatooine," Carth groused.


	63. Chapter 63

**Jennet**

To everyone else, Canderous certainly seemed more effusive than usual when expressing his pleasure in the Phoenix. However, not being privy to his thoughts, they could not guess the absolute delight and childlike wonder that was seething under the surface. I was quieter than usual while presenting the ship to him; that was largely due to listening to Canderous in my head. His astonishment and almost gushing comments were irresistible.

Later, when we had a rare moment of privacy, I suggested we move on board, at least until after the wedding. It would sleep us and the honor guard easily. Jarxel already had a private room in camp; one of the privileges of being XO. But our extra cabin could be offered to a guest, and our regular room could as well.

"In fact," I pointed out, "the cabin on the Phoenix is actually more comfortable, and has its own 'fresher. No more having to leave the room to get a shower. Maybe we should just move on board permanently until something better can be arranged for our quarters."

"Not a bad idea, Wildcat," Canderous said. "I could give Jarxel my old quarters; it's bigger than his anyway. That would leave Jarxel's room in the barracks open. Who should we offer it to? Jolee, Bastila, Mission, or Dustil?"

"Well, Bastila's bunking on the Ebon Hawk; Ladria offered to put her up, and they have plenty of room. Jolee too; he claims the gurney in the infirmary is good for his back. Let's offer the extra cabin on the Phoenix to Mission. If Dustil will be sharing it with her, she'll tell me; otherwise, he'll remain in the barracks. As for Jarxel's old room, I think we should keep it in reserve for Stefan. He commed me this morning to say he'll be here in a couple of days," I said as matter-of-fact as I could.

Canderous looked at me a moment, face impassive. "All right, Wildcat, that will work. He's about equal in rank as Carth, I suppose. It would be best to follow protocol."

"That's not it," I said quietly. "I just figured it would be less awkward to have Stefan as far away as possible from us on our wedding night."

He looked at me long enough that I wanted to squirm. Finally, he said very softly, "Cyar'ika, he's family to you, and he loves you. For that, he'll have my respect, hospitality, and whatever courtesy I can extend. Whatever you two had, it's over now. And it doesn't compare to us. Put him wherever is convenient and comfortable."

"_You_ invited him," I reminded him. "I know you don't like him and likely never will. I don't fault you that; I doubt I'd be sweetness and light to any woman that you had had a meaningful relationship with."

"I did invite him," Canderous rumbled. "not necessarily for the most noble of reasons; I wanted him to know what he lost, and what I have. What _we_ have. He hurt you, Jennet. I wanted him to pay. Now…I can say I honestly don't care about that anymore. I'll always care you were hurt, mind. But rubbing his face in it…that's petty, and small. I don't care to be small in my thinking anymore."

I eyed him silently, and he stared calmly back. I smiled.

"Practice that speech long?" I asked brightly.

"Nah, it was pretty much off the cuff."

"And at least eighty percent banthashit." I smirked.

"Now, that's just wrong, Wildcat. I'm a changed man; you said so." Canderous protested.

"All right then, I'll offer the extra cabin on the Phoenix to Stefan," I said sweetly.

Watching him struggle to keep up the pretense was almost as much fun as listening to him rave about his new ship. His face didn't change much but he clamped down hard mentally; a sure sign he's containing strong emotion. I let him battle himself a minute or two and finally let him off the hook.

"Don't worry, ti kar'ta," I soothed. "I was planning on having the Phoenix to ourselves on that night. Mission will probably volunteer to move out anyway, and I expect the honor guard will leave us be too, if we promise to seal off the ship once we're on board. And you don't have to hide that you don't like Stefan from me."

"I don't hate him," Canderous said in a low voice.

"I know."

"I'm willing to give him a chance. I know family is important to you."

"It is. But _you're_ my family, and the Mandoa, and our friends. Stefan always will be, too, but he's not an idiot. He has a very good idea how you feel about him, and trust me, he doesn't blame you."

"I could give a fuck what he thinks of me," Canderous growled.

"You've made that abundantly clear," I said, smiling.

"You know, it's not easy to maintain irritation when you're being so damn reasonable," he groused.

"Is it? I'm sorry," I said insincerely.

"I'll play nice with Stefan," Canderous promised. "I was going to anyway for your sake."

"I know that, ti kar'ta," I said softly. "I appreciate it. I just don't want you to think you have to lie to me, that's all. Or feel like a hypocrite."

"I don't," he assured me. "Now."

I smiled. "That's good, then."

The next day we signed off on the treaty and Carth disappeared to his ship to transmit it to the Republic Senate, Captain Bard with him. I spent the day with the Elders, the Ebon Hawk crew, Jarxel, and most of the honor guard, strategizing the wedding ceremony. Elder Evana would be officiating, with Elders Gregor and Drane assisting. We borrowed whoever was handy to fill in for Canderous, Carth, Tagren, and Zuka, who were busy elsewhere. Canderous had asked Jolee and Dustil to stand with him, and both had delightedly accepted, making the male attendants Jarxel, Carth, Jolee, Dustil, Atton, Bao Dur, and Disciple. Mine were Ladria, Mira, Visas, Megari, Danni as flower girl, Lorna, Mission, whom I'd asked the day after she had arrived, and, after some thought, Bastila.

I didn't like her much, it was true, and she didn't seem to like me a whole lot either. But she did have respect for Canderous, enough to have made the trip. To be honest, I really didn't care if she ever liked me or not, and it didn't bother Canderous either. I was willing, however, to come to some sort of truce, and to give her a chance. So I took her aside after the treaty was signed.

"Master Bastila," I said formally, "I was wondering if you would do me the honor of being one of my attendants during the wedding."

She stared at me, clearly surprised, and was silent long enough I was starting to regret the offer. Finally, she spoke.

"Why?"

"Well," I said, dropping my formal tone, "it's like this. We got off on the wrong foot, and I'd like to start over."

"You don't have to ask me to be in your wedding for that," Bastila said coolly.

"No. But I am," I said sincerely. "You were with Revan, too. I'd like to hear about that, from someone besides Canderous. This wedding is a new beginning, on a lot of levels, but very personally for him. He's made peace with a lot of things in his past. It's right you should be a part of it. He has a lot of respect for you, you know."

"He doesn't like me any more now than he did then," Bastila said, matter-of-fact.

I looked at her consideringly. "That's where you're wrong. He did like you, as well as he could at the time. He hasn't said so, and won't, but he's pleased you came."

"I wouldn't call it 'like'," she said, "for either of us. Respect, perhaps."

"Well, it's a start. I won't say you and I won't clash again," I smiled winningly. "But respect, you have. And I really would like it if you would be in our wedding."

"I..." Bastila seemed to be struggling. "Thank you," she said quietly. "I accept. It's…kind of you to ask."

"Thank you," I said as warmly as I could manage. "I'm glad."

"You remind me of Revan," Bastila said suddenly. "She was…well, as impulsive as you, and a warrior. But kind."

"You miss her," I said softly.

"Yes. She was…is…a friend." She paused. "I have few enough friends," she said briskly. "I haven't the knack to attract people like she does. But you do. I…envy that, I think."

Telling her that the prickly and formal attitude she presents didn't help would be counterproductive, I supposed. I tried to swallow it; I really did. But my mouth just gets me in trouble.

"Maybe if you relaxed and smiled, people would want to talk to you more," I said, and clapped my hand over my mouth. "I'm sorry," I said immediately. "That was rude, and I really do want to get along."

To my utter shock, she started to laugh. "I can see why Canderous loves you," she said, amusement changing her whole face. "He said something similar to me once. I thought it was one of the most ironic moments of that mission; a Mandalorian teaching a Jedi how to relate to others. I was furious at the time, but he had a point."

"I shouldn't have said that," I apologized.

She waved me off. "I'd rather have you be honest. I'm well aware of my shortcomings. Perhaps if more people were like you, I'd feel freer to speak my own mind."

"You don't seem to have much difficulty there," I said dryly, thinking of the near disaster at the treaty table.

"No," she said dismissively, "I have no problems voicing my opinions when it comes to a mission. It's just…well, it doesn't matter."

"No, I think it does," I said with interest. "What were you going to say?"

She was quiet for a while, as if assessing whether I really wanted to know. Apparently coming to the conclusion I did, she said slowly, "I've isolated myself, trying not to give in to…passion. The Jedi didn't allow close personal ties because emotion confuses issues. I found out first hand that it can, and does," her mouth twisted in a bitter smile. "But Revan…she is passionate, and I think Ladria is too. You most definitely are; it's all over your aura. But none of you are dark, at least not anymore, and you never were."

"How are you so sure?" I asked curiously.

"Reading auras is something I'm particularly good at," she said without a trace of a boast. "You lack the distinctive marks of someone that has gone over and been redeemed. Ladria never quite fell; but it's in her aura how close she came. Visas, Canderous, and Atton all have the signs, but they're so faint now it's nearly a shadow."

"Interesting," I said sincerely. "Is that something you can teach?"

"Possibly; I've never tried. I find it both useful and uncomfortable. I don't care for others to know too much about me so quickly; I try not to put anyone in the same position, and don't particularly enjoy inside knowledge, so to speak," she shrugged.

"That explains a lot of your isolation," I said thoughtfully. "Constantly being on guard about what you see."

"Yes," she said. "And I seem to upset people regularly. Revan used to scold me about being negative. I don't understand why; truth shouldn't be insulting."

"People don't like complete honesty," I explained gently. "They like to think the best of themselves, and others."

"I suppose that's true," she said quietly. "It's not the first time someone has pointed that out. I do try," she said wistfully. "I just don't have…empathy, I think."

"You have the gift of battle meditation," I argued. "That requires empathy. So does reading auras. You've just cut yourself off from it."

She looked at me thoughtfully. "I have no idea why I've told you all this," she said finally. "I don't even know if I like you, and you don't seem to like me."

"People tell me things," I shrugged. "And maybe I do like you, a little. Now."

"Perhaps I do too. A little," she agreed. "Now."

"Friendships have started in worse ways," I grinned, and she smiled back.

Rehearsal took hours, and about midway through the missing wedding party members showed up. It was decided that everyone but Megari and Danni would be in battle gear for the ceremony itself, and could change into semi-formal clothing afterwards, if they wished. The reception wasn't so much a formal greeting of guests as a prolonged party, which was great with me. Finally, the Elders had everything arranged to their satisfaction, and dismissed us. I looped my arm through Canderous' and headed toward the mess hall, Lorna trotting ahead. She had been particularly pleased about being part of the wedding party. I liked her a great deal; she was obviously fond of Canderous and protective of 'her boys' as she put it. She had only been on Dxun a month, but knew everyone and everything about them, it seemed.

"What did you say to Bastila?" Canderous asked me curiously, breaking in to my thoughts.

"Huh?" I blinked at him.

"She was almost human today," he explained. "I think I even saw her smile."

I shrugged. "I asked her to be in the wedding because I wanted to be on better terms with her. It's never a great idea to be constantly clashing with someone you'll be fighting with." Canderous nodded in agreement. "We got to talking, and found out we could get along, that's all. She's nice enough when you get to know her. And…I think she's lonely. She's quite aware of rubbing half the people she deals with the wrong way. I kind of feel sorry for her."

"Don't let her know that," Canderous rumbled. "She'll slice you off at the knees for it."

"Probably," I agreed.

"Want to go for a walk, Wildcat? When was the last time you were outside the camp?"

"I don't remember," I said. "Probably when we went to Onderon. A walk sounds great."

"Let's have lunch, and walk it off, then."

"Sure," I said, pleased.

Lunch was leisurely, and most of the wedding party had eaten and gone by the time we finished. Soon we were heading out the main gates, Dax, Kex, and Xarga accompanying us. I followed Canderous, not caring where we were headed, just glad to be relatively alone with him and out of the camp. We were alert for cannoks and other predators, but encountered none. It was hot, and I wasn't in armor, but did have a shield strapped to my wrist, as did everyone else. Jungle humidity is murder, and I could feel my hair forming damp ringlets around my face. I'd been growing it out; my healing ability makes it do that faster than most people, and it was now a couple of inches above my shoulders. I cursed under my breath that I hadn't brought something to tie it back with.

"Here, Wildcat," Canderous stopped me with a hand to my arm, a leather bootlace in his other hand. Without comment, he gathered up the thick mass of my hair and tied it firmly. "Better?"

"Much," I said, feeling a slight breeze on the back of my neck.

We wandered a bit, and I gradually became aware that we were heading somewhere specific. Canderous was trying to be casual about it, but there was something buzzing under his surface thoughts. I cocked an eyebrow at him, and he looked blandly back.

"Where are we going?" I asked curiously.

"You'll see," he said cryptically. "We're almost there."

A few minutes later, we were suddenly in a huge clearing, bordered by high rocky cliffs and a gorgeous pond. A waterfall was at the far end of it, throwing out heavy sprays of mist which caught the light and made rainbows shine everywhere. And over on what, oddly, appeared to be a huge concrete pad was what appeared to be half the camp. A cheer went up at our appearance, and I looked at Canderous, mystified.

"What's going on?" I asked suspiciously.

"It's your wedding gift, Wildcat," Canderous said smugly.

"You made me a landing pad?" I said stupidly. "Well, it's handy now that we have the Phoenix."

He laughed. "No, cyar'ika, the landing pad is over there," he waved behind the crowd. "Take a closer look."

I walked over to where everyone was milling around, and paced off the slab. People moved aside as I did, and some followed. Finally, I stood in the middle and faced the pond. I saw that the beginnings of what looked like a dock were in place off the bank. Why would we need a boat dock near a hanger? And then it hit me. I spun around, calculating the area of the slab, and turned to stare at Canderous.

"You're building me a house?" I said wonderingly.

"Got it in one," he said, smiling broadly.

"A real house? With walls I can hang things on? And furniture that isn't bolted to the floor?" I was babbling, I knew, but I couldn't stop. "A whole house, for me?"

"Well, cyar'ika, I expect I'll live there too," Canderous said gravely. "If that's all right with you."

"That's fine," I assured him, and burst into tears.

I dimly heard a ripple of laughter run through the crowd as Canderous strode over and picked me up. I hid my face in his shirt, wrapped my arms and legs around him and cried harder. I could hear his laughter rumbling deep in his chest as he held me.

_You love it, yes?_

_Yes yes yes yes yes, _was all I could manage.

Eventually I got a hold of myself and I groped for something to clean my face with. Disciple, ever the gentleman, handed me a handkerchief. He's the only guy I know that actually carries one. I gave him a watery smile in thanks and mopped away my tears.

"Thank you, ti kar'ta," I said as Canderous set me down. "It's almost as perfect as my necklace," I joked feebly, touching it in reflex. I rarely take it off.

"You could have told me that sooner, Wildcat," Canderous said in mock exasperation. "I could have saved a hell of a lot in credits."

"Can we afford this?" I asked, suddenly worried.

I used to live pretty cheaply, but then, it was only me. Aside from ship maintenance, dock fees, and food, I never spent much except on weapons. I like to read, and would splurge on electronic books too, but most often I'd trade them in for new ones at the next port. I love real books with pages and covers, but they're bulky and not as easy to slip into a knapsack. I've never really had to budget or keep track of credits; bounty hunting usually made enough to cover until the next job, and I never lost in the fight ring. I hadn't touched my cache in the lockbox on Onderon until I bought the Phoenix. Canderous had made a casual comment that he was moderately wealthy just before we got to Dxun, but I had no idea what that meant exactly.

"No worries there," Canderous assured me. "With the Republic helping us build, I can afford it easily. Furniture too. Not bolted down," he promised. "And things to hang on the walls."

"And an armory," I added, eyes shining.

"Of course," he said. "I love a woman who's got her priorities straight."

I kissed him then, and a cheer went up around us.


	64. Chapter 64

Bao Dur approached a roll of paper in his hand. "I printed out the floor plan," he said, grinning. "I thought it would be easier to visualize on the actual site."

He unrolled the blueprints, setting stones on the corners to keep it flat. I traced the rooms with my finger, reading aloud the labels.

"Audience chamber," I said, noting it was the full length of the house, with several doors leading off it. There were indicators that either end of the room could be closed off with folding panels, and large tables could be set up for conferences or dining. Storage cleverly hidden in the walls could contain more folding tables and chairs, so the chamber could be used for feasts or mass meetings.

"Dining room, kitchen, pantries," I recited, and moved to the second page. "Bedrooms…._ten _bedrooms?" I exclaimed, counting again to be sure, "_and_ a master suite? Who the hell else will be living there, the entire honor guard and their families?"

"Well, you did say we'd have children someday," Canderous reminded me with a wicked grin. "I want as much room as possible. You're looking at the second floor. The honor guard has their own wing on the ground floor."

"It has wings?" I yelped. "I'll own a house that has wings?"

"Two," Bao Dur confirmed. "The honor guard on the right, the servant's quarters on the left."

"Servants?" I gulped.

"It's a big house, cyar'ika," Canderous said easily. "You need someone to help run it. Especially if you're on campaign with me."

"I suppose," I said doubtfully. "I've never had a servant, I wouldn't know what to do with one. It seems…pretentious."

"Servant doesn't mean servile," Canderous said seriously. "There will be plenty of our people that will be happy to make an honest wage working for us. You'll do fine. Not much different from leading men in battle, actually."

"If you say so," I said. "But why ten bedrooms?" I asked, getting back to my former point.

"Kids, partly," my Mate said. "Guests, too; we'll likely have more diplomatic visits than we used to. And friends."

"That will be new," Jarxel said, raising an eyebrow.

"Exactly," Canderous agreed. "We need somewhere to put them."

I noticed that there were six bedrooms in what I was thinking of the family area, as well as the master suite. Those shared good-sized 'freshers, one for every two bedrooms, with doors from each leading in to them, but no access other than the bedrooms. The guest quarters each had their own small 'fresher. The master suite consisted of a bedchamber, office, and sitting room, with a huge 'fresher that looked like it had a sunken tub big enough for four people, if the scale was right. Separate from that was a large shower, with multiple heads. I sighed in rapture.

"I can't wait to try the tub," I murmured to Canderous.

"Might be as fun as the shower," he agreed, with a purr in my ear.

"Look at the rest of the ground floor," Bao Dur urged, and I turned my attention to it.

The servant's wing had another six bedrooms, each with a small 'fresher, and one with a separate sitting room. There was a large common area, and a small kitchen off it. The honor guard wing mirrored it. We'd provide basic furniture, Canderous explained, leaving décor up to the individuals. The rest of the house consisted of a large functional kitchen, a private family dining room, huge common family area, an armory near the honor guard wing, a gym, sauna, and two offices that could be combined into one large room by opening more folding walls. And off the gym was a small room marked "Jennet's meditation room". I sniffled.

"Thank you," I said, touching the space on the blueprint.

"You're welcome," Canderous said. "You missed a room," he added, placing my finger off the family room, next to my half of the office. It was marked "library".

"How did you know?" I asked wonderingly. I'd always wanted a library of my own; I hated not being able to really keep books.

"I watch you read," Canderous said, smiling. "And I can hear your thoughts; you might have noticed."

"Well, duh," I said, turning a little pink.

"I think she likes it," Bao Dur said, grinning widely at Canderous.

"She does," I laughed. "Thank you so much. Did you design it?"

"Modified the basic floor plan Canderous found, yes," the Iridonian confirmed. "It was a good plan to begin with. I added the front hall and the wings, and rearranged things to include the gym, sauna and meditation room. Here's the grounds," he added, laying a third blueprint out.

The outside included three hangers and a large landing pad, a short dock into the pond, several much smaller but decent sized houses, and various storage sheds.

"What are the houses for?" I asked curiously.

"Jarxel will have the largest. The groundskeeper and the housekeeper can have their own place," Canderous explained.

"I thought the larger servant's room was for the housekeeper," I said. "Not that I'm complaining."

"It could be, if they prefer," Canderous shrugged. "Or the next senior servant can have it. This gives flexibility and prestige to whoever works for us. I want people comfortable, and a family feel."

"That's generous," I said, surprised.

"Well, knowing you, you won't be comfortable being waited on in the first place," Canderous said with a wry smile. "They'll all be treated as family anyway if you have anything to say about it. On a practical level, servants that are treated with respect and appreciation will defend the family they serve. This is the Mandalore's household, after all; we need to be able to defend it, if necessary."

"I wouldn't have thought of it that way," I said thoughtfully.

"Yes you would, in time," Canderous said. "You're a warrior."

_I already saw that the place is well defended,_ I noted silently. _Security camera, lights, lasers, alarms. But I don't see a shelter for non-combatants in the plans; I can't believe you didn't include that._

_I did,_ Canderous said smugly. _Or at least, Bao Dur and I did. They're not on the plans, of course. _

_The kitchen pantry, right? _I said silently. _There's a trap door there. I don't see a break in the foundation, though._

_Very good, Wildcat. It's hidden well, _Canderous answered. _A hydraulic system lifts up the concrete. It's thinner there, reinforced with fibersteel and shielding. A whole suite of rooms will be down there with walls thick enough to sustain a pretty big blast. It has a separate power system too. And an escape route in case the house is leveled above it._

"You thought of everything," I said aloud. "How long before we can move in?"

"Well," Bao Dur said, "Canderous found a contractor on Onderon who is very good. Clearing the jungle started around the time the battlefield was done. The foundation was begun not long after that and they finished it yesterday."

"So that's where you've been lately!" I suddenly realized. I had noticed that Bao Dur's tall figure hadn't been seen much around the camp the last few days.

He nodded, a small smile on his face. He wasn't going to say so out loud, but I understood the Iridonian had been supervising the contractors in the construction of the shelter. Canderous, of course, wanted very few people to know about it, and trusted Bao Dur implicitly. I was willing to bet that the contractor was one that had a reputation for doing discrete work such as this, if you knew how to ask.

_How complete _is_ the shelter? _I asked curiously. I had a feeling he would want it as finished as possible away from prying eyes. Anyone living there, of course, would know about it, but who that would be aside from the honor guard hadn't been decided yet.

_Down to the last bedroll, _Canderous answered. _We kept things simple; all the furniture is either built in or can be folded away. Bedrolls can be stored; saves room over beds. Secondary battery system kicks in automatically if the primary goes out. Cooking and 'fresher is as basic as could be managed. It's stocked and useable right now; I didn't want to do it after the house was built. Most of the Ebon Hawk crew helped with that. The contractors just dug it, walled it, installed environmental controls, and built the escape tunnel. They were under the impression it was primarily a basement and wine cellar, with the tunnel being the secret; the entrance to that is hidden in what seems to be a storage closet. Bao Dur installed everything else with help from Megari and the others._

"Workers will arrive the day after the wedding to start construction," the Zabrak continued, and I gave him my full attention again. "Be about a week for the structure to go up; another ten days for finishing, and however long it takes you to get furniture and such."

"So soon?" I said, surprised.

"They're assembling large parts of it off site," Bao Dur explained. "Construction of the buildings themselves on site will mostly consist of attaching big pieces to each other. Finish work goes pretty quick with the robots they have nowadays. Better start picking out paint chips and such."

"We can help with that," Ladria said, seeing my sudden doubtful face. "If you like." Visas and Megari nodded solemnly.

"I would, thank you," I said with some relief. I hadn't the slightest idea where to start.

"Glad they volunteered," Mira said cheerfully. "I don't have a clue."

"I know a decorator on Onderon," Atton said unexpectedly. "He's reasonable in prices, and owes me a favor."

"Is there anyone you don't know?" Ladria asked him, surprised.

"Well, as I've met the Queen of Onderon, not many," he said, twinkling at her.

"That sounds great," I said to Atton. "If you could contact him for me, Ladria and Megari will help deal with the rest of it. I don't want my house being entirely someone else's idea how I should live."

"No worries," Atton assured me. "He's pretty easy to get along with. Just don't insist on pink anywhere; he gets cranky."

"I'll keep it in mind," I said, laughing.


	65. Chapter 65

**Canderous**

I hardly saw Jennet for the next five days. She holed up in our former quarters most of the time, glued to the computer, calling up holocatalogs of furniture, paint samples, window dressings, and other household goods. The second day Atton's decorator friend arrived and devoted himself to memorizing floor plans and designing rooms. He had a clever little computer that projected three dimensional images in miniature so one could judge the effect. Half the female population, including a fair amount of Republic soldiery, wandered in and out, oohing and ahhing over details. I dutifully witnessed a few rooms, approved anything Jennet wanted, and made myself scarce. I avoided the area like the plague and the honor guard set up a fair rotation in duties so each member only had a few hours a day with it.

Stefan arrived two days into the madness, and cheerfully set about making himself useful helping with the decorating chaos. That was fine with me; Jennet was never alone with him, being surrounded constantly with chattering females, and it kept him out of my hair. I spent most of my time with camp details and observing the daily fights between the Mandoa and Republic soldiers. They were having a blast with the battle scenarios, and I spent a good portion of my days in the company of the other males avoiding the decorating craze in the computer room.

We had taken a quick half day trip up to Onderon to deposit Jennet's assets with my investment broker and get her set up in my accounts. I was impressed by how much she had put aside over the years, especially as she was so young. I insisted her credits were her own when she simply wanted to dump it all in with mine.

"We don't need it, Wildcat, and you earned it yourself. Keep it for our future children if you like, or fun, whatever. I can support us," I tried to explain.

Her eyes narrowed and she said carefully, "Are you saying I won't be contributing to our family?"

"Of course not," I said, recognizing the signs of an impending argument, and wondering what the hell I'd said wrong. "I just don't want to take any independence away from you."

"I was under the impression that what's mine is yours," she said reasonably. "That includes assets. You're free enough with your credits with me. This is a partnership. Ergo, I contribute too."

A half hour of wrangling, we came to the compromise that she would pay for half the furnishing of the house, and split the rest of her assets between an independent fund in her name only, to be used at her discretion, and the rest to be deposited into our now joint accounts. In return, I made my own independent account. I was utterly mystified as to her insistence of these terms, and said so.

"I don't mind you supporting me," she explained, "but I am bringing my own modest wealth into this marriage. If you insist on what's mine is mine, and what's yours is mine, I won't feel like things are equal. I don't care if you can buy several small planets."

"That's why I wanted you to keep your credits," I protested. "You're not chattel, you're my wife. It's your money."

"But you're saying your money's mine, too. So where am I contributing, exactly?" she countered. "Think of it as dowry, if you like."

I saw the wisdom of that, and the compromise satisfied both of us. Privately, I figured my account would be held in trust for any children we had. She caught that before I could bury it sufficiently, and admitted that she had had the same thought about hers. Serious argument diverted, I set about enlightening her to the extent of my personal wealth. She was silent for a long time after the broker had explained things.

"You know," she said thoughtfully as we headed back to the shuttle, "for someone who didn't care if they lived or died or thought they had a future, you certainly were preparing for one."

I stopped in my tracks, and stared at her. "I hadn't thought of it that way," I said slowly.

"I think you were subconsciously planning to pursue the Helm long before Revan handed it to you," Jennet said quietly. "Otherwise, why invest your earnings at all? It's easy enough to blow credits on gambling, drink, expensive weaponry, women, whatever. But you didn't do that."

"No," I said, thinking back. "I didn't. I could usually build better armor than what's available to buy; I never saw the use of spending credits on that. A few excellent quality and well-maintained weapons were all I ever needed, and most quarters I had were already furnished. I always thought that my tendency to invest my credits were just habit; I hadn't any need to have a lot on hand, and it seemed wasteful to just let them sit. Plus, rumor of lots of disposable wealth makes you a target. I had considered getting a good ship from time to time, but never really needed it until I went looking for my kin, and by then I had followers that were more than happy to share expenses on their own vessels."

"Amazing how your brain works," Jennet said, smiling. "You're one of the most intelligent people I've met, and yet you compartmentalize things so completely that you're not even aware of half the things you reason out until you need it. Makes me wonder what else you have going on in there you're not aware of."

"I could say much the same about you, Wildcat," I grumbled.

"Probably," she said cheerfully. "We're quite a pair."

The morning of our wedding dawned bright and clear. I had woken early, and took a quick run around the camp, Xarga and Kex in tow, leaving Jennet sleeping peacefully in our cabin on the Phoenix. It rained a lot on Dxun, mostly in early mornings or night. It had done so last night, and the air was clean and cooler than usual. I was glad of that, but knew it would be the usual sweatbox by the time the wedding battles started. Heading back into our cabin, I showered and was just thinking of waking Jennet up in a way guaranteed to start her day right when the door buzz rang loudly through the room, jerking Jennet awake and startling me off of the bed. Snatching a robe, I opened the door as behind me, Jennet fumbled for her own robe and shook the cobwebs out of her head.

Jarxel and Visas stood outside the cabin, both rumpled, as if they'd hastily thrown on their clothes in the dark. I had the impression that if I could see Visas' eyes through her veil they would be wide and frightened; she was nearly vibrating with suppressed agitation. Jarxel was looking concerned and confused, his arm around her. Xarga and Kex were looking on in puzzlement.

"What's happened?" I asked, stepping out of the cabin with Jennet right behind me.

"Nothing," Jarxel started to say, but Visas cut him off.

"Trouble," she said calmly enough but the fear was there; I could almost smell it. "A Sith warship is on its way to us."

I felt rather than heard a collective hiss of surprise from everyone.

"You're sure." It wasn't a question.

"Yes," she nodded sharply. "I had a vision. They're not in range yet, but will be in a matter of hours."

"Why here? Why Dxun?" Jennet asked, now wide awake.

But the answer hit all of us at the same time. The Jedi. Right now, Dxun had probably the biggest concentration of surviving Order members of anywhere in the galaxy. We all exchanged significant looks, and I signaled Jarxel to alert everyone, and have them meet us here. He hurried off to comm the Ebon Hawk and Carth.

"But how could they know they're here?" Jennet asked generally. "The rip in the Force is mended, how could the Sith track them?"

"They didn't," Visas said somberly. "We've been betrayed."

"Let's get dressed, Wildcat," I said. "No point in making Visas tell it twice; everyone will be here in a minute."

We threw on clothes and were emerging from the cabin again as everyone showed up, all looking rumpled and confused, but calm. I knew Jarxel had not told anyone what was going on over the comm; no telling who might be listening in. But everyone was aware something was wrong and looked at me expectantly. I shrugged, gave a wave at Visas and pointed to the common area. Crowding Jennet and me, nine Jedi, Jarxel, Carth, the honor guard and the Elders into the main cabin, we all turned to Visas expectantly.

"As I told Canderous, there is a Sith warship on its way to Dxun; it will be here in a matter of hours," the Miraluka woman was calm, but I could feel through Jennet that every Jedi in the cabin was picking up her agitation. "They are intent on exterminating the last of the Jedi, of course," she held up a hand as Ladria started to speak. "Our mission was successful; they are not tracking us through the Force. We were betrayed by one of our own."

"Who?" demanded Mira fiercely, echoed by several other voices.

I was somewhat surprised that no one questioned Visas' accusation. I've had my differences with Jedi, and certainly seen more than one fall to the dark side. But there was none of the disbelief that I would expect.

_You weren't surprised when you were betrayed by one of your own and given to Rikes, _Jennet reminded me silently. _Why should Jedi? Besides, we've witnessed the accuracy of Visas' visions before._

_How do we know it's not her? _I asked cynically, but immediately relented. _But no, she wouldn't warn us in that case._

_Exactly._

Visas looked over the room, veiled eyes not lingering on anyone, and opened her mouth to speak. There was a blur of movement, and suddenly I was thrown with considerable force across the cabin by an unseen blast. I scrambled to my feet to find Jennet was being held tightly, an unlit lightsaber at her throat.

"Stay back," Bastila said calmly. "Or your Mate will never speak her wedding vows."

"You can't take all of us," I growled. "And your friends will kill us all anyway."

"No," she agreed. "I can't. But one brief flicker will sever her head nearly from her body. Your only hope to get her out of here alive is to do what I say."

She was right. Bastila was gripping the hilt of the 'saber in such a way that once lit, it would burn straight through Jennet's neck. All Bastila would have to do is drop her and it would split her from throat to through the top of her head. I stood very still. Jennet was calm, and not bothering to struggle. I could hear her calculating in her mind the chances of escape.

_Don't do it, Wildcat, _I warned her. _Wait for an opening._

_Thanks, _she said sarcastically. _I wouldn't have thought of that._

I wondered why the Jedi didn't throw a stasis on Bastila. Jennet answered that readily.

_If she blocks it, she'll light the 'saber, and she's prepared._ _Too risky. Canderous, love, you might have to let her kill me. There's too much at stake here._

_The hell I will._

"How?" Ladria asked simply. "Why?"

"Revan," Bastila said, spitting the name like it was poison in her mouth. "So sure of herself, so serene in her belief she actually redeemed me. As if I needed it, or wanted to be. I knew at the Star Forge she would win, and chose to live rather than die like that fool Malak. I let her believe she'd brought me back to the light," her words were like acid. "I helped the Republic win, because it was inevitable they would; no use prolonging things. And it occurred to me: what better place to strike at the Jedi than within their own ranks? _She_ taught me that. I brought her to the Council, we turned her against her own people. And she lived in my head from the moment I saved her pathetic life. No privacy, always having to guard my thoughts." Her face twisted.

"It was the link, wasn't it?" Ladria said quietly. "You somehow have cloaked your own aura by linking with Revan. Where is she?"

"Nowhere you'll find her," Bastila said serenely.

She'd regained her calm, apparently having vented her spleen for the moment. This was both good and bad; angry, she might make a mistake, but could just kill Jennet out of hand. Calm, she could be much deadlier. On the other hand, the only thing from keeping everyone in the room from attacking was her 'saber at Jennet's throat, and she knew it. Impasse.

_Keep her talking, _Jennet suddenly said to me. _We need to know all we can, and it buys me time to find a chink in her armor._

"I don't understand," I said, using my best growl. "You can cloak your aura with Revan's?"

I saw a few heads turn to stare at me incredulously, obviously thinking I was out of my mind to be asking stupid questions at a time like this. But Ladria caught my eye and I saw understanding there.

"Yes," she said, nodding and looking back at Bastila. "I've never heard of it being done, but it's the only explanation for how she could hide so long. Revan herself might not be aware of it."

"She is," Visas said with certainty. "Not at first. But she became aware of it just after she left to hunt the Sith. And Bastila followed, somehow captured her, and has been keeping her somewhere, alive, so she could continue the charade."

"Where is she, Bastila?" Carth said with a growl that I would have been proud to utter.

"Don't be foolish, Admiral," Bastila said quietly. "You know that's a useless question. Now, to business. I will spare the camp. You all will be my guests on board my ship. Atton will fly us, and the rest of you will kindly disarm and get into the captain's cabin. One wrong move and Dxun will be a smoking rock by the end of the day."

"Why the fuck do you think we'll do a thing you say?" I snarled. "The minute you let go of Jennet, you're dead, and you know it. Alive, she'll kill you; dead, we will."

Bastila smiled. "You have hope of escaping with her skin and everyone on Dxun's intact; that is why."

Mission walked into the cabin, calling "Hey, what's going on? Dustil was –" her voice died as she saw the scene in front of her.

Bastila had instinctively turned toward the sound of a new voice, and in that instant, Jennet _moved._ I had felt her shift her sight to hyper awareness almost as soon as Bastila had grabbed her. When Bastila relaxed her grip on the 'saber, Jennet simultaneously sent a burst of healing through herself and dropped like a stone straight down, breaking the taller woman's grip. The 'saber lit, but too slow to do more than singe a stray curl. Jennet rolled back as she hit the deck, forcing herself into a handstand and kicked Bastila in the face and wrist. The 'saber dropped from her hand, snuffing out, to be snagged by Bao Dur, and all the remaining Jedi threw stasis on Bastila; I could feel the energy soaring through the cabin. Jennet tumbled forward, coming up in a crouch. She stopped dead as she saw Bastila unmoving, trapped and struggling to break free.

"Well," she said brightly, "now what?"

"We need her alive to find Revan," Carth snarled. "Much as I would love otherwise."

"Could someone tell me what the Force is going on?" Mission asked generally, looking shaken.

Carth took her aside to bring her up to speed; the rest of us busied ourselves with restraining Bastila. Jarxel fetched the gurney from the infirmary and I had the distinct pleasure of roughly frisking the still immobile Bastila for weapons and strapping her tightly down. I wanted to snap her neck but acknowledged that if we could get any useful information from her, that would be best. I might have tightened the cords a tad more uncomfortably than was strictly necessary, though.

"This will do for now," I announced, "But I wouldn't trust it to hold her forever."

"The stasis unit in the Elder's shuttle," Jarxel suggested. "Is that strong enough?"

"She's broken out of one on her own," Carth said. "I wouldn't trust it for long."

"I'll see what I can do about that," Bao Dur said briskly. "I might be able to fine tune it to be more effective."

"Do that," Ladria agreed. "Disciple, what sort of drugs do we have on hand that might get her to talk?"

"I'll check," he sped off toward the infirmary.

I sent Kex and Xarga to fetch the stasis unit. Bastila during all the commotion was almost eerily silent. Jennet, her face impassive, approached the gurney and studied her thoughtfully.

"Visas," she said softly, "I have an idea. I need you and Ladria to help me. Canderous too, and Carth."

The four of us gathered around Jennet, out of earshot of the captive.

"Visas is a Seer," she said quietly. "And Ladria is gifted in creating Force bonds. You've said I might be the same way," Jennet looked at her, and Ladria nodded.

"I'm almost certain you are," she acknowledged.

"I share a bond with Canderous, and Carth has a connection to Revan, who is linked to Bastila. I was able to connect with the Republic soldiers during our mock battle. Is it possible we could combine Force abilities, harness that to Visa's power of Sight, and break through any mind trick of Bastila's?" Jennet asked, a little uncertainly.

"It's a good theory," Ladria said thoughtfully. "I have no idea how to go about it."

"We all felt Kriea's thrall," Jennet pointed out, "except Carth. I figured out how to draw on the Republic soldiers by following Canderous' energy trail through his men during mass battle ecstasy and mimicking it. If we meditate and recall the thrall and its energy signature, we might be able to connect directly with Bastila."

"Worth a try," I said, trying not to show how uneasy I felt about letting anyone other than Jennet into my mind ever again.

"I don't love the idea," Carth said, a slight frown on his face. "But if it helps us find Revan and avert the attack on Dxun, I'm game."

"This could be dangerous," Visas said softly. "She's twisted enough to make Kriea look perfectly sane." She shuddered slightly. "I can feel the darkness in her like snakes writhing. She has an extraordinary gifted mind to be able to have hidden that for so long."

"To fool a Miraluka for even a few days is extraordinary," Ladria agreed. "I don't think we should attempt this with just the five of us."

"You're not going to," Jolee strolled in, the rest of the Jedi behind him.

Ladria looked at him, a slight frown on her face. "How much did you all hear?"

"Most of it," Mira said brightly.

"Look, little girl," Jolee addressed Ladria in his usual brisk manner, "Bastila fooled all of us, and was instrumental in exploiting the rip in the Force to hunt down Jedi, I'm sure of it now."

"You had an idea about this, and never said anything to the Council?" Stefan asked incredulously.

"Since when did the council ever really listen to me?" Jolee countered, eyebrow raised. "But no, not really. I just caught a glimpse of something once in her aura that made no sense…until now. Thought my eyes were playing tricks on me."

"General, I'm not letting you do this without me," Bao Dur said firmly.

"And I've had experience with twisted minds," Atton said gruffly. "I might be useful."

"You're all insane," Mira said clearly. "My kind of stupid. I'm in."

"As senior Jedi present," Stefan said with a smile, "I should point out this idea is completely unorthodox and probably would never have been allowed by the council. Fortunately, we seem to be the council now. Let's do this."

"Senior?" Jennet said, raising her eyebrows.

"Highest rank here," he said, shrugging. "That will change, I expect. Revan and Ladria certainly have more practical experience in leadership than I. Anyway, I never did follow Order rules all that well."

"Could we stop chatting about Jedi ranking systems and get this done?" I growled. "Sith warship about to destroy my planet, thank you very much."

"Canderous has a point," Disciple said. "I have some drugs here that should make Bastila less a threat to us all, and more open to suggestion. Let's get on with it." With that, he strode over to her and injected a hypo into her carteroid artery. She went limp, her head lolling against her shoulder.

"Jarxel, I want you and the honor guard ready to shoot Bastila if she so much as gets one strap free while we're busy here," I said to my XO. "If something goes wrong, kill her. Then alert the camp, evacuate non-combatants and fly the Phoenix and the Ebon Hawk to that warship and find a way to take it out. Take as many warriors as you can pack into both ships. That program Bao Dur gave us should get you on board."

"Aye, Mandalore," Jarxel said, nodding grimly.

We all stood around Bastila, taking hands and starting to meditate. I had Jennet on my right and Visas on my left. Jennet was very calm, her small hand steady and warm, engulfed in my much larger one. I could feel a small tremor in Visas' that stilled as she breathed slowly and began to go into a trance. I concentrated on listening to Jennet and keeping my own vigil, and soon was unaware of the physical touch of the women by my sides.

An energy much like battle meditation ran through me. I was always aware of Jennet; the warm feel of her mind was so much a part of me I couldn't always separate my thoughts from hers. I sensed now that she needed me for grounding. I had wondered why she included me, with no real practical experience in this sort of thing. I became aware of the life energy and mood of each member of the circle: Disciple calm and assessing, Visas strong and confident, now that we were entering her area of expertise. Jolee faintly worried but relaxed and alert, Ladria remote and still, Mira eager, Atton solemn, Bao Dur quietly calm but fiercely protective, Stefan serene but with a kind of wild energy I wouldn't have associated with him. Carth was grimly determined, but was gradually relaxing, realizing that calm was the best tool now.

Jennet was faintly anxious, but very controlled and focused. I felt her assessing each life force around her, tracking their energy and mood. Touching mine was almost a physical caress, and I felt my whole body relax and my mind settle to an alert calm. Then I felt Ladria and Visas step forward mentally and sort of _merge _with Jennet; I can't think of a better word than that. Drawing on the energy of the circle, they joined their own abilities. The intensity of the energy focused to a fine, piercing blade. I could almost see the three of them reaching out, plucking threads of power from each of us in the circle: Jolee's clear sight and balance, Mira's strength of will, Atton's cunning, Bao Dur's serenity and compassion, Disciple's logic, Stefan's raw reckless power. They wove these traits into a single shining sword. I felt a weight from Jennet, and knew I was the anchor keeping all of us from drowning. I didn't know what exactly she was doing; there were no words for it. But I braced, and felt it take hold, and was determined that I would lose no friends this day.

The last thread was Carth's. Ladria carefully sorted through his psyche and gently wove his connection to Revan through the whole. And then, with a smooth thrust, the blade struck Bastila's mind.

The drugs were working; she was wide open. I saw things I hoped I would never witness again. I've killed more people than I can count, but the sort of blackness she was could never compare to what I'd done. I've killed without remorse, or pity, but she thrived on death and the souls of the fallen.

_Hold on, ti kar'ta, and pull us back when I say, _I heard Jennet's voice floating a million light years away.

_I don't know how, _I answered, near panic. I don't panic, and this feeling scared me worse than what I saw in Bastila's brain.

_Just find me, and pull me back. You can do that; the rest of them will follow._

She was right, I could. I'd drawn stim from her, and remembered how it felt when she helped me break Kriea's thrall. I braced myself again, and waited.

Confused images raced through us and I hoped someone more qualified than me could make sense of them. There was a great emptiness where the Bastila I had known five years ago had been. I wanted to weep from the desolation. Emotions I hadn't expressed in decades were surging through me, and I grimly bottled them, put them aside. Jennet would need me soon.

_NOW!!_

I heard, and heaved with every ounce of strength I had, actually _feeling_ my hand grip Jennet's and hauling her from the nameless pit of hell she was teetering on. The blackness was trying to suck her down and away from me, and I roared at it, beating against it, slashing with my mind, pummeling with fist and feet and soul. She suddenly popped free, as if flung from a catapult, and I felt the darkness reach for me.

_That's right, you bastards, take me, not her. Never her, _was my last thought as the pit engulfed me.


	66. Chapter 66

**Jennet**

_He's done it,_ was my first thought when we broke free of Bastila's mind. Then I felt his utter stillness, and wanted to go insane.

"Canderous!" I shrieked, and threw myself on his body. "Dammit, no, no, no! Get back here, fight it, damn you!"

I saw Jarxel approaching, and barked at him. "Cover Bastila, damn it!" I was wild with terror, but couldn't allow Bastila one inch of slack; somewhere, my mind was split, and part of it was still functioning, assessing the greater need.

But I was going to kill her slow myself if Canderous was gone.

"Help me!" I screamed, and suddenly, Ladria and Stefan were there, clasping hands with me, focusing on the still form of my Mate. I ruthlessly grabbed every bit of energy I could muster from all three of us, and dove without hesitation into Canderous' mind.

Stefan gave me power. Ladria gave me focus. I used them to battle into the darkness that had taken my Canderous. I felt as if I were swimming through the blood of the Hutt I had killed; rank and thick. Somewhere ahead, there was a spark I recognized, and I reached for it.

_I'm sorry, Wildcat, _I heard, and I wanted to cry. _Get out of here; I can't do that twice. Better you live than me._

_The hell with that, _I said, and grabbed him with everything I was.

In the midst of the madness, I felt my friends gather, and throw me a shining cord of light. I grabbed at it, hauling the spark that was my world, my life, the other part of my soul after me. And awareness hit me again.

He was breathing, and suddenly gasped and sat up with a jerk. I went limp with relief.

"I'm sorry," I sobbed, throwing my arms around him. "I shouldn't have risked you like that. My fault, I'm so sorry. But you did it, you're safe, we're safe, oh shit I almost killed you, don't _do_ that…"

The slap he dealt me rocked my head back and I shut up, stunned, clasping a hand to my cheek in reflex, but my hysteria was abruptly gone.

"I'm okay, Wildcat," Canderous growled, and I started to cry.

"My fault," I wailed.

"No," he said firmly, gathering me close and holding me still. "My _choice_. You think I would have let you do that alone?"

"I don't even know what I did," I said miserably. "Or if it worked."

"It did," Visas spoke with conviction. "Imperfectly, but I think I got enough to at least give us a start where Revan is. Nothing else of use, at the moment," she added softly. "But given time, we might be able to make some sense of things."

"Let's focus here, people," Jolee barked. "Sith warship, remember? Canderous, can you move?"

He nodded, and stood up. I was clinging like a barnacle to him. He let me hold him for another moment, then set me on my feet.

"Cyar'ika, I'm fine," he rumbled. "You didn't even feel your healing go off, did you? Whatever happened, I'm okay now. We have more important things to worry about."

I stood straighter, ashamed at my lack of control. I'd never lost it before in a crisis; I sure as hell didn't want to start now. Wryly, I admitted it was too late; I'd broken my streak when I thought I'd killed Canderous. But I was okay now.

"Right," I said, taking a deep breath and looking around the circle of our friends. "What do we do with Bastila? Is she alive?" I asked as an afterthought.

"Yes," Disciple reported. "But comatose. I wouldn't trust that, though."

"Any chance we can get anything more out of her?" Carth asked quietly.

"Slim to none," Ladria said with certainty. "I'm not even sure what we did get."

"There's no time to sort it out now," Canderous pointed out. "We need to get to that warship."

"We can't take her with us, and we can't trust either the stasis unit or that her bonds will hold," I said softly. "And we know she can't be turned back; if Revan couldn't, there's not a chance in hell we'll manage."

Before anyone could stop me, I snagged the lightsaber Bastila had held to my throat off the table. Five steps and one quick slash, and Bastila was gone.

"I've killed for mercy before," I said calmly, looking around at my suddenly silent and shocked friends. "I hope she finds peace."

"That," said Stefan in a deadly voice, "was murder."

"No," said Canderous, equally deadly, "It was necessary. You felt what she was. I'm only sorry that I didn't do it."

_I could have spared you that, _Canderous said softly in my mind. _You should have let me._

_No, _I answered. _I couldn't._

"If anyone has any problem with my solution, go ahead and kill me now," I said, looking each of the Jedi in the eye. "I won't stop you. There's a Sith ship on its way; make up your minds."

"They'll have to kill me first," Canderous snapped, stepping in front of me.

No one spoke for a long moment, but Canderous, Carth, Atton, Mira and Jolee all stared back at me calmly. Finally, one by one, everyone else looked up and nodded.

"Jedi don't execute their captives," Ladria said quietly. "And until now, I thought that was wise. I can't say I totally agree with you, but it's done, and we have a mission."

"I'm not a Jedi," I said, equally quietly.

"There's where you're wrong," Stefan said unexpectedly. "You always have been. The Order doesn't really decide that, you know; they just find and train Jedi. The first time I held you as a baby, I knew what you were. And I'm sorry."

"For what?" I asked, mystified.

"Killing Bastila wasn't murder," he said, his blue eyes steadily holding mine. "I shouldn't have said that. It was mercy. That has always been your strength. It was her only release from the torment she had brought on herself. Given time, we _might_ have healed her. But time is something that's never in as much supply as we need. It always runs out."

I nodded. "Yes," I said simply. There was a world of meaning there that I didn't have time to deal with.

Jolee broke in, impatient. "We gonna debate ethics, or are we gonna kick some Sith ass?"

"I vote kicking ass," Mira said brightly.

"Okay" Canderous said, touching my arm. "We have way too many chiefs here, so I'm going to make this simple. You Jedi can sort out your own chain of command as we fly. Jennet and I will take as many of our men as we can fit onto this ship and head to the warship. You all take the Ebon Hawk and meet us there, with as many soldiers as you can pack in. Carth, I know you'll want in on this fight, but I need you down here to lead the rest of the troops if we fail."

"Fuck that," he snapped. "Captain Bard is more than capable. I'm going with the Jedi."

"Fine," Canderous said coolly. "Arrange it. Visas, how far out are the Sith?"

"As far as I can tell, two hours from orbit," she said.

"All right. We leave in twenty minutes. Jarxel, coordinate with Captain Bard on the evacuation of the non combatants. We can't fit all the Mandalorians on board; I need you to lead the rest if the Sith get through. Send the best we've got to me. Have a detail come by to collect Bastila's remains of there's time."

"Aye, Mandalore," Jarxel saluted, and strode off, the Elders in his wake.

"Zuka, Kex, take the body out of here. All of you," he indicated the honor guard, "Grab your gear and be back in ten minutes. We'll suit up on the way. Anyone have any thoughts on how to blow that fucking Sith ship out of the sky?"

"What about proton bombs?" I asked, thinking of the Ravager.

"We don't have the materials, and can't count that we'll find any on board," Canderous said flatly.

"I could probably overload their engines," Bao Dur said thoughtfully. "The infiltrating program might give me the codes. Even without that, I should be able to manage it."

"I could help," Mission said. "I can crack any computer in the galaxy, and engineering is my specialty."

"Could you do it on your own?" Canderous asked.

"Sure," she said positively. "Engines are engines anywhere, and computers talk to me."

"Good," Canderous said in his command voice. "You fly with us, then. We get on board, meet up in the engine room, and whoever gets there first starts the overload with the rest of us covering. I need both of you to explain to everyone what needs to be done so that if something happens to you, we can execute the plan. Any questions?"

No one had any.

The Mandoa warriors arrived, lugging their gear, Jarxel at their head.

"I told you I needed you here," Canderous growled.

"You told me to send the best," Jarxel said. "I left Kumas in charge, and in all likelihood the fight won't get to Dxun."

"One of these days you might actually follow an order," Canderous said, resigned, and pointed him on board.

Dustil was with them, flatly refusing to leave Mission, and both Jolee and Stefan insisted that a couple of Jedi in our party might be useful. Canderous didn't bother to argue, and soon we were in the air, speeding toward the Sith ship. I didn't have time to be nervous. I slipped into our cabin where I quickly strapped on my armor and weapons, Canderous doing the same. We barely spoke. The Phoenix and the Ebon Hawk were both much faster than a warship; we estimated intercepting it within a half hour. We made our way to the cockpit, motioning Mission to come along. Dustil followed, with Stefan and Jolee right behind.

"Sith vessel ahead, Mandalore," Dax reported as we came in. "The jamming is working beautifully."

"We getting any data?" Canderous asked.

Mission was already at the computer, scanning the screen and tapping away. "Got it!" she crowed. "Docking codes transmitting."

We waited a tense minute, and them Mission said, "I'm getting landing transmissions. Transferring them to navigation now. Oh…" she trailed off, a broad smile on her face. "This is _sweet_," she said smugly. She dug a datapad out of her pocket and plugged it in to the computer interface.

"What?" Canderous asked impatiently.

"They use an automatic preflight system to fire up all transports and fighters on board," she said gleefully. "It's tied to the main computer system so all a pilot has to do is jump in and fly."

"So…." Canderous said, a light in his eye. "You can overload that?"

"Give the man a cigar," Mission quipped. "I can make every ship in this place dead in the water."

"From here?" I asked.

"Unfortunately, no," Mission said. "And I'm needed in the engine room anyway. But get me to any computer that's tied to the mainframe and it's done."

"What about escape pods?" Canderous demanded.

"They're on a secondary system, but that will be easy," Mission promised.

"Good girl," he said approvingly. "Do it as soon as you can. Is there a manual override?"

"Of course, they're not complete idiots," Mission said dismissively. "But I got that covered. I can fry the circuit that controls it too. Enough time, I can make it go boom when they try to switch over." She had been busily loading more datapads as they talked, and tossed one to each of us. "I downloaded the ship schematics," she said, grinning. "So we don't get lost."

We landed, Dax powered down, and everyone crowded to the garage, the men spilling into the halls. Canderous, Mission, Dustil, Jolee, Jarxel and Stefan and I were at the door, the honor guard right behind us. Canderous turned toward the mass of warriors.

"Men, protect the Twi'lik woman at all costs," he barked, raising his hand over Mission. "She's instrumental in keeping us from being pursued, and killing every fucking Sith on this ship. But don't worry; there will be plenty to go around."

"Aye, Mandalore!" roared the crowd.

"Let's do this," he snarled, and gave the order to open the hatch.


	67. Chapter 67

We erupted from the Phoenix, fanning out, weapons at the ready. No one challenged us; the landing bay was empty. Canderous swore under his breath, and signaled for a couple of men to open the door. I kept Mission behind me, and Dustil was next to her. She was good with a blaster, and fair with a sword, or so she and Carth said. But we didn't want her engaging if we could help it. I waved Angus and Jenks to flank her and Dustil, giving them a nod, which they returned. Two more warriors joined, and she was surrounded with bodyguards. The door opened, and we moved forward with caution.

We didn't meet up with anyone breathing until we got to the main body of the ship. There were maintenance and mechanic droids here and there, which we took out as quietly as possible. Then we got through to the central corridor, and smack against about twenty troops. I marked the one diving for the intruder alert and went into overdrive; took him out before he hit the button. Then I was surrounded, and Canderous was on the other side of a wall of Sith troopers.

Blaster fire erupted, and I was busy blocking shots and mowing down anything that wasn't Mandalorian or Jedi. I felt Canderous's ecstasy merge with my Force abilities and the eight or so enemy in front of me looked to my heightened awareness to be moving in slow motion. In short order, the corridor was littered with bodies, and no one had taken a hit. No klaxon yet, either, and I smiled grimly.

"You've improved beyond recognition, my dear," Stefan said in an undertone as we hurried toward the engine room. "That was impressive."

"Thanks," I said, shrugging. "You're no slouch yourself."

I'd never seen Stefan in an actual firefight before, and he moved with a grace that reminded me of Mom, and a wild joy that was a lot like I remembered Dad.

"I try."

Canderous caught up with us and growled, "I'd appreciate it if you didn't get surrounded every time we're in a fight."

"Had to stop him sounding the alarm," I said. "Sorry."

We turned a corner, and Canderous briefly checked his datapad. "This should be a central computer room," he said, indicating the door.

Two men opened it, revealing several technicians. An officer turned toward us. "This is a res –" his voice was abruptly cut off by two shots to the head, and the rest of the room's occupants opened fire. There were only eight, and I didn't even get my 'sabers lit before everyone was dead. Mission hurried in, and hacked into the computer.

"I need ten minutes," she reported, and we covered the door as she worked, her bodyguards staying close.

Canderous' comm crackled, and he answered it. "Mandalore here," he barked.

"We're halfway to the target," Atton's voice came through, tinny and full of static. "So far, relatively undetected."

"Let's keep it that way," Canderous growled. "No comms unless there's an emergency. Meet you there. Mandalore out."

As he stowed his comlink, he spotted movement down the hall. "We got company," he called. "Hurry it up."

"Five more minutes," Mission said shortly.

Canderous, Jarxel and Kelborn picked off the three troops heading our way before they even registered we were there. However, behind them were about thirty more, who stared stupidly at their dead comrades for a moment. With an unholy shout, Mandalorians erupted out of the computer room, charging the Sith troopers. The corridor wasn't wide, and I dove across the hall to open another door for cover. Big mistake.

There were about twelve men in that room, which appeared to be a droid repair shop. Canderous was right beside me, Jolee and Stefan behind, Dax on the other side of me. Jarxel and the rest of the honor guard were in the corridor as the five of us dove into the room, blasting and slicing anything that moved. I felt Canderous take a hit to his left arm, and I charged the trooper that had done it, killing him with a vicious slash of my lightsaber. The honor guard joined in the fight, and in less than two minutes, all twelve men were dead and I sent a general blast of healing out, accompanied by Stefan's and Jolee's.

It was silent in the hall, and we checked to see if anyone was wounded. Very few casualties, I was pleased to see. I patched up everyone that needed it as Mission emerged from the computer room.

"Done," she said happily. "I gave them a nice little surprise too, if they try to use their cannons on us as we escape," she said, a wide wicked smile on her face. "The computer will start playing battle simulations and tie up the defense grid for hours. By the time they can shut it down, the ship will be vapor anyway."

"Kid, you got style," Canderous said, grinning. "Good job."

The ship was a maze of corridors and rooms, and I was very glad that we had a map. I had no idea how big this place was, and wondered why no intruder alert had been sounded yet. We were hardly quiet, with fifty in our party. Just as I was uneasily going to comment on that point, a klaxon sounded.

"They know we're here," Jarxel said unnecessarily.

"Good, I was starting to get bored," Canderous said acerbically. "What's the use of raiding a ship if no one fights back?"

"You got your wish," I pointed out as we hit a large open room filled with about fifty troops.

Dustil and Mission dropped back, bodyguards blasting away as they made for cover. Canderous gave a roaring battle cry and we charged, flanked by Stefan, Jolee, Jarxel, and the honor guard. About half of our men fanned out and started shooting; the remainder split right and left to try and outflank the enemy. I felt Canderous's battle ecstasy burn through me like wildfire, and suddenly merge with the Mandalorians.

We hit the enemy like a battering ram, and half of them were dead in seconds. I was back to back with Canderous, lightsabers whirling, his vibroblade humming like a demented tuning fork. I concentrated, and felt our men plowing into the Sith troopers, mowing them down with gusto. The Ordo battle cry rang through the room. I saw Stefan battling a Dark Jedi, Jolee assisting, and soon the room was as silent as the tomb it had become.

"That was fun," Kex commented, grinning widely.

I clapped him above the elbow as I couldn't reach his shoulder easily and grinned back.

A quick pause to regroup and heal, and we were on our way. Twenty minutes of pausing to fight and moving on, and we were in the engine room. It was littered with bodies, and Bao Dur was already working on the engine core.

"About time you guys showed up," Atton smirked, and Canderous glowered at him.

"We stopped to let Mission sabotage the computer system," I said brightly. "They can't get off the ship now."

"I hope she didn't shut down our ships," Mira said after Mission explained.

The Twi'lik looked indignant. "Of course I didn't," she said irritably. "Our ships aren't tied to the system."

"Okay, okay," Mira said soothingly. "Sorry. You done good. I'm pretty handy with computers myself; I wouldn't have thought of triggering that bug with the cannons. I'm impressed."

"Thanks," Mission said, mollified.

"Hey, little one, can you give me a hand here?" Bao Dur called. "Monitor the computers while I tinker with this thing."

Mission trotted over, and in a few more minutes, the Iridonian stood up.

"That does it," he said, a light in his eyes. "We've got twenty minutes before this thing blows."

"All right," Ladria said, nodding to her XO. "See you back on Dxun," she said to us with a smile.

The two parties headed back toward their ships. I was almost disappointed; it had been too easy. I should have remembered about the Force and hubris.

We were almost back at the docking area when we ran into a patrol that was blocking the corridor we needed. Too late to retreat; we'd been spotted, and blaster fire rang out. I was busy blocking blaster shots, but the corridor was narrow and we were going to be picked off. In between shots I counted about twenty in front of us.

"We got company behind," came a call near the end of the line.

"Shit," Canderous swore. "We're bottlenecked."

"You and Dax throw me over the troops in front of us," I said. "And charge as soon as I'm airborne."

"We know how well that went last time," Canderous growled.

"No time, no better ideas," I said, blocking another blast that was coming towards his face.

"I hate it when you're right," Canderous snarled, and the two of them flung me over the heads of the enemy.

I felt them charge as I flew, and the mass ecstasy washed over me before I even hit the deck. Many of the Sith had ducked instinctively as I cannoned toward them, and I swear I felt my hair brush the ceiling. I tumbled, throwing myself into a somersault and rolling as I touched down. I popped up, 'sabers spinning, and took out five before anyone could properly turn to face me. The ecstasy was singing through my head, the energy making my arms feel as if they were as light as air, and my 'sabers harmonized with the song of battle. Canderous and the others were ripping through to me, and I got four more before we met in the middle. Without needing words, we ran toward the Phoenix, the men at our heels.

At the docking bay, Canderous and the honor guard moved to the sides, covering the retreat, and I busied myself blocking stray shots. The last dozen or so of the Mandalorians were retreating backwards as they fired at about twenty more Sith troopers. They stopped in the doorway, taking position to cover our own escape into the Phoenix. But Canderous had already holstered his blaster and drawn his blade; we leaped forward, Jolee and Stefan flanking us with Dax, Jarxel and the rest of the honor guard fanning behind, blasting away. I felt Canderous' battle song flow through me, and my Force abilities joined in. We slashed anything that moved, in a dance of perfect synchronized death.

Until Canderous took a hit dead center chest, and went down. I felt his connection abruptly cut off; he was alive, I could tell, but barely. I threw healing his way, and that cost me a precious few seconds; I barely blocked a sword thrust at my throat, and didn't even feel the strike to my head.

I came to on the Phoenix, Canderous holding me, his face white and angry, which meant he was scared. I smiled, and touched his cheek.

"You're alive," I said, happy to see it.

"Would you stop doing that?!" he yelled.

"What?" I asked, still fuzzy. My healing was low, but there. I felt a wave of warmth flow over me, and saw Stefan, pale but composed, standing near me. It was his healing I'd felt, and my head cleared. I sat up.

"Saving my ass, and nearly getting killed yourself in the process," roared my Mate.

"Can't promise that," I said brightly.

The Phoenix was in motion, and Dax's voice came over the intercom.

_Hang on, this might be rough._

We roared out of the landing bay, shooting into space like we'd been launched by a catapult. I hoped the Ebon Hawk was already clear. Not two minutes out, we felt the explosion of the Sith warship, and a collective sigh of satisfaction rippled through the cabin.

"So," I said, "What happened?" I cocked an eyebrow at my Mate.

"Canderous took a hit to the chest and went down," Stefan said behind me. "I thought he was dead, but then you paused and got hit yourself. He sat up, saw you out on the deck, grabbed your long 'saber and killed two Sith troopers with it. Jolee and I got the last two. Then he scooped you up and we got to the Phoenix. How are you feeling?"

"Fine," I said. "Where's my 'sabers?"

Canderous handed one to me, and Stefan held up the other.

"Those were Drake's, were they not?" he asked as I retrieved it from him and clipped them to my belt.

"Yes," I said. "Mine, now."

"As they should be," Stefan said quietly. "He'd be very proud of you."

"Thank you," I smiled a little sadly.

"How is it," he asked, turning his attention to Canderous, "you can use a lightsaber? Even with Jennet unconscious?"

"Not a clue," Canderous said shortly. "And not my style. I just grabbed what was at hand."

"Interesting," Stefan said thoughtfully, but said no more.

We took stock of the troops, dispensed healing and kolto where needed, and settled for the short trip back to the camp. Canderous wouldn't let me out of his sight, and I wasn't unhappy with this; I needed to see him breathing too. He sat in one of the chairs that bolted down, and I sat on the deck, leaning against his legs. I was suddenly tired, but felt my healing coming back, so I knew I wasn't bad off.

"So, Wildcat," Canderous said after a time. "Want to get married?"

I looked up, and smiled widely. All tiredness left me in a rush of happy warmth.

"Bet your ass I do," I said.


	68. Chapter 68

**Canderous**

The trip back to Dxun only took fifteen minutes or so; apparently the warship had continued its progress towards our moon during our raid, but slowly. Atton had commed to assure us that everyone on the Ebon Hawk was safe, and to report that they'd seen the Sith vessel vaporize. It confirmed our own data, and a cheer went up all over the ship when I had Dax announce it.

Mission, Jennet, Jolee, Stefan, and Dustil were in the cockpit when we received Atton's communication, and there were celebratory gestures all around. Jennet and Mission hugged everyone, and when the Twi'lik got to me, I picked her up without waiting for her to fling herself at me first. I caught a brief glimpse of Jennet's face, grinning broadly.

_You old softie._

"We owe you our lives," I said to Mission, giving her a rib-creaking hug and a kiss on the forehead. I set her down, deliberately next to Dustil, and offered my hand to him. "Good work up there, both of you. Not one fighter, transport, or escape pod got off that warship."

Dustil shook my hand, frowning. "I didn't do a thing," he protested.

"You protected Mission," I corrected. "And that was important. I saw you get in your fair share of kills, too. The Republic is going to be lucky to have you."

Dustil glowed a bit at the praise, but simply put his arm around Mission and kissed her cheek.

"You scare me sometimes, the chances you take," Dustil said quietly to his fiancé, and I chuckled.

"Get used to it," I informed the young man. "It won't get easier."

Jennet gave me a half hearted scowl, and I tucked her under my arm as we went back to the main cabin. We landed a few minutes later. The rest of the camp was gathered at the battlefield; Jarxel had commed ahead to give our ETA and assure everyone the mission was a success. A cheer went up as we disembarked from the Phoenix, and as everyone on board the Ebon Hawk filed out of the hanger. Elder Gregor approached, and shook my hand.

"Good work, Mandalore," he said gruffly.

"I didn't have much to do with it," I said ruefully.

"You got everyone moving," Elder Gregor pointed out. "Sometimes that's all a leader needs to do."

Elder Evana bustled up. "It's still early in the day," she said brightly, and I realized with a start she was right; not even noon yet. "Will we proceed with the ceremony?"

Jennet had reached us then, having been held up by celebratory hugs and hand slaps. "You bet," she said happily. "Give us a few hours to clean up, and eat. I'm starved; is the mess hall functional?"

"Um," said Kumas, who had been reporting to Jarxel and was approaching, "Yeah, it's functional. Lorna refused to leave it; said you'd all need to eat when you got back." He looked distinctly uncomfortable. "I tried to get her to evacuate, Mandalore; even sent two of our biggest guys in to haul her to safety. But she beat them off with," he gulped, looking embarrassed, "one of those big solid steel spoons. Almost gave Barren a concussion. I figured if she could do that, she'd be all right if we did have to fight, and let her be."

I stared at him a minute, the image of Lorna whacking Barren with a spoon trickling into my brain. The laugh that escaped me probably scared Kumas to death at first, but I just waved a hand at him, taking gulps of air and holding my sides as I roared with amusement. I heard Jennet and the honor guard joining in behind me.

"You did okay," I said to Kumas, when I'd caught my breath. "Lorna can take care of herself. She's deadly with kitchen utensils." My mouth was twitching, but I managed to keep from snickering again. "Let's go eat, shall we?"

We headed en masse to the mess hall, and I watched Jennet regain all her strength as she ate. I put away a fair amount myself. Lorna came to the table, refilling platters and bringing pitchers of beverages. I smiled as she bustled about.

"I hear you beat up one of my warriors," I said conversationally, trying not to grin.

"Hmph," she sniffed. "Silly boy, as if you and Jennet would fail. _Someone_ has to keep their priorities straight; I knew you'd be hungry when you got back." She sent a fond smile at Jennet. "She needs to keep her strength up. And it's your wedding day!" Lorna's voice rose a tad, and she beamed at us both. "I'm not about to let all this food go to waste."

"Thank you Lorna," Jennet beamed back. "Your devotion to duty is admirable. But honestly, if we ever do have an imminent attack again, I would much rather have you alive than dinner on the table."

"I can take care of myself, darlin'" Lorna said cheerfully. "You just leave that to me."

Jennet sighed. "I'm not going to win here, am I?"

"Welcome to my world, Wildcat," I chuckled.

Lorna patted Jennet's cheek and gathered up the empty platters, preparing to take them back to the kitchens. Jennet stopped her with a hand on her arm.

"Just a moment," she said politely, and leaned past me to address the Elders.

"Elder Evana," she called, and the older woman looked up, head tilted in attention. "I think we can dispense with the wedding battles, yes?"

"Certainly, dear," came the answer. "This morning's work is more than enough."

"Good," Jennet nodded. "We have one more bit of business left today. The ceremony will begin at sunset."

"We'll be ready," Elder Gregor promised.

"I'll assign a torch detail," Dax said, and Jennet nodded.

"Thanks, Dax. Ladria, can you gather the Jedi, Carth, Dustil, and Mission, and meet me at the battlefield in fifteen minutes?" Ladria agreed, and Jennet turned to me. "Where's Kumas?"

"Around here somewhere," I said, and then caught what she was about. "I'll find him."

We all met at the Phoenix, which was again parked on the battlefield. Jennet looked solemn as she looked around at our circle of friends.

"Kumas put Bastila's body in a storage shed. He didn't have time to bury her, and wasn't sure what Canderous would want him to do with her, in any case. I think that's up to all of you," she said quietly. "I don't feel I should have a say in this."

There was silence for a while, and I studied their faces. Carth had his blankest look, Mission looked ready to cry, and Dustil just frowned somberly. Disciple had a thoughtful frown; Atton, Mira and Bao Dur were neutral in expression and stance. Ladria and Visas seemed remote, Stefan as bland as Carth. Only Jolee didn't seem upset or uncomfortable, or like he was trying to hide either emotion.

"Bastila was a puzzle to me when we traveled together," he said almost casually, but even I could feel the tremor of sadness that laced his tone. "Her aura was infused with great passion and drive, but she kept herself so controlled. In many ways, she embodied why I left the Order; the constant battle of denying your own nature to serve the greater good. I never did hold to that. Bastila tried too hard to keep to an ideal she didn't feel herself capable of ever achieving." His deep brown eyes held regret and sorrow.

I shifted a little, not wanting to meet that look, but held it steady, almost defiantly so. I didn't regret Bastila's death; only that Jennet had done it, because I knew what it cost her. I wished devoutly that I had been the one to snuff that life; one more on my conscience made little difference to me. But Jennet was fiercely denying in my head that it was my place to do it. I couldn't agree that it had been hers, but completely supported its need. I was almost, but not quite, angry that no one else had had the guts to step up and do it.

"But," Jolee continued softly, "she had been a good Jedi once, a good woman. My only regret is as her friend, I didn't see what was in front of me until it was too late to save her."

"She was," Mission said dully. "But what she became…" her voice trailed off, and I saw a tear track down her face.

"How is she any different than Revan?" Ladria asked. "Revan fell, committed terrible acts of murder and betrayal, but she was redeemed. I understand the necessity of what Jennet did, but I can't help but think…"

"That we should have locked her up somehow, given her a chance," Jennet said flatly. "Don't think it hasn't occurred to me. I can't take it back. And I didn't see a choice."

"There wasn't one," Stefan said with some forcefulness, before I could even open my mouth to defend my Mate. "She was a danger to us all, and we couldn't risk her escaping. I wish I had seen it too, believe me. I cared about her and considered her a friend. We spent a lot of time in council, and she seemed so committed and determined to make up for her fall. But if Jolee's right, she was helping to exterminate the Jedi, and damn near did it. We all," he gestured around the circle, "saw her mind. It was horrific, and utterly without sanity as we know it. I say it was a mercy to release her from that. I can't believe that redemption isn't possible, even from the grave."

"Do you really think so?" Visas said softly. "There's hope, even in death?"

"I do," Stefan said firmly. "And I think we should give her proper Jedi rites, with the hope her soul finds peace in the Force."

"At twilight, then," Ladria said quietly. "I agree."

"I'll see you after, then," Jennet said. "At the wedding. I hope you still want to attend."

"You're not coming to the funeral?" Ladria asked, surprised.

"I don't think I have much right to be there," Jennet said, eyes down.

She was trying hard not to cry. I could feel it, and I suddenly understood that she was terrified that her friends blamed her for killing Bastila. Worse, she blamed herself.

_I told you once you have a gift for instinctive conclusion based on the data at hand, _I told her silently. _You did was necessary and best for everyone, including Bastila. And if they find it a little cold and calculating for their tastes, remember it was the Jedi that were willing to let my people exterminate whole races for 'the greater good'. You were trying to save lives, not just rid yourself of trouble._

_I suppose, _she said dully. _I just wish it didn't feel so rotten._

_Welcome to the club, General Ordo, _I said, echoing Carth's words of a few days ago. _You make hard decisions. Don't apologize because you can._

She gave a mental shrug, but I felt her tears recede. Standing straight, she lifted her eyes again to Ladria.

"You more than anyone have the right to be there," the other woman was saying to Jennet, eyes serious and compassionate. "You gave her peace, and did what none of us could."

"I could," I heard Carth mutter next to me, but no one else heard. I gave him a sideways glance, and he caught my eye and nodded bitterly. "So could you."

"Yeah," I muttered back, "but I wouldn't feel bad about it later." Carth gave a wry twist of the lips in acknowledgement.

Jennet looked at Ladria a long moment, and finally gave a nod. "Yes," she said, her voice low but not ashamed. "Yes, I'll be there."

"Good," and all the other Jedi, and Mission, nodded in agreement.

"Are…" Jennet faltered, then cleared her throat. "Will you all still stand with me at my wedding?"

"Why the fuck wouldn't we?" Mira exclaimed in honest surprise. "Because you killed an evil bitch that wanted us all dead? We should thank you for that. Or maybe I could be pissed I didn't have the nerve."

There was a short shocked silence, followed by guilty laughter.

"Mira has a point," Bao Dur said in his gentle way. "And I for one never once considered bowing out of the ceremonies. You and Canderous are my friends. And the universe needs as much love in it as it can get."

There was a general murmur of agreement, and everyone managed to touch or hug Jennet as the group broke off in their various directions. Mission was last.

"I'm sorry Bastila is dead," she said as she gave Jennet a hard, fierce hug. "But what you killed wasn't her, not the person I knew. She died long before you ever met her. Don't ever feel you did something bad."

Jennet did cry then, and clung to Mission for several long minutes. Carth and I exchanged looks over their heads, and Dustil put a comforting hand on his fiancé's shoulder. I didn't touch Jennet, but let her feel my presence in her mind, and she calmed down.

"Thank you," she said to the Twi'lik, and kissed her cheek. "I'm sorry about your friend."

Mission made a gesture that managed somehow to convey both regret and practical acceptance. "She made her choice. I'm just sorry what it was," she said simply.

Carth looked at Jennet gravely. "I'm not sure what you did, or how big a part you played when we invaded Bastila's mind," he said seriously. "But Visas and Ladria both seem to think that because of it, we have a chance of finding Revan. I'm sorry that Bastila is dead, but I agree with Mission. She made her choice. The way I see it, you did what was needed."

Jennet just nodded, and wiped her eyes on her sleeve.

Carth bent and looked her in the eye, his hazel gaze intent, a hand on her shoulder to both steady himself and keep her attention. He wasn't nearly as tall as me, but then not many adults are as tiny as Jennet. She looked at him, eyes wide and a little startled.

"Even if it doesn't pan out, and I never find her, and she never comes home, I'll never forget what you did to help. It was your idea, and I'm grateful. Thank you." Then he kissed her, quick and light, once on the mouth and then on the forehead. Before either of us could react, he gathered his son and daughter and left us alone. Jennet touched her lips and stared after his retreating back.

"Well," she said thoughtfully after a long moment of silence. "I wonder if he's going to kiss all of us."

"Not if he wants be intact when Revan comes back," I growled, but without heat.

I was surprised that I felt no jealousy at all. Jennet could tell, and nudged me gently.

"Careful," she said teasingly, "you're coming dangerously close to being civilized."

"Nah," I said comfortably. "I'd pay money to see what happens if he tries that with Mira. Dax would challenge him, at the very least."

"Or Visas," Jennet said. "I think Jarxel would kill him."

"Jarxel?" I said, shocked. "When did that happen?"

But then I thought about this morning, and Jarxel with his arm protectively around the Miraluka woman, both rumpled. I had assumed at the time that she had woken him first, so the honor guard would let her in to see me and Jennet. Now I wondered if he had awakened because he was there when she had her vision.

"I'm not sure it has," Jennet said, picking up my thoughts and sharing her own. "Just a couple of things she's said, that's all. Not my business. But if it's true, I'm happy for them."

"Yeah, me too," I said distractedly. I meant it, but the thought underscored how different my world had become since Jennet burst into it. I smiled.

"We have a wedding to prepare for," I reminded her, and bent to kiss her soundly.


	69. Chapter 69

**Jennet**

As I had predicted, Mission was moving her things out of the Phoenix when I arrived to shower and polish my armor.

"This is the last night in your life you want any guests," she said cheerfully as I made a feeble and insincere protest. "Stow it, you know you would have asked if I hadn't offered."

I grinned sheepishly, and she laughed. "There's room on the Ebon Hawk," she said with an impish grin. "And Dustil can live without me for a night or two."

"You could always oust Carth from his private room," I suggested with a wicked smile.

"Gods, no!" she exclaimed. "Dad's pretty sure about how things are, but he doesn't _want _to know until we're married. You know how fathers get."

"Yeah," I said, smiling, and trying not to show the sudden well of sadness. I wished my dad was here to give me away, with a sudden fierce regret.

"I'm sorry," Mission said softly. "I forgot you lost your father so young."

"Don't be," I said, giving her a hug. "I was older than you were. At least I remember him."

"I got lucky," Mission said, all smiles again. "I got another, with Carth. And when I marry Dustil, he'll really be my dad."

"Is that why he didn't adopt you?" I asked curiously. She'd shared large chunks of her life after the Star Forge mission, including that Carth had offered to do just that.

"Yeah," Mission said seriously. "I turned fifteen right after we got back from the Star Forge, and we picked up Dustil on Telos. I was crazy in love with him by the time I was sixteen, and told Dad that he couldn't adopt me, because I couldn't marry my legal brother in any system. He was hurt at first, but realized pretty quick I was serious. He agreed not to, but made both of us promise we wouldn't jump into anything. So I went to school, and Dustil went to the academy, and neither of us changed our minds. And I know Dustil had plenty of opportunity to." She said without jealousy, simply fact. "So did I, for that matter. But I knew what I wanted. Dad saw it, and agreed to the engagement a few months ago. We're waiting until Dustil gets his commission first, though."

"Good idea," I said approvingly. "You're an extraordinary woman, you know. To know at sixteen what you want, and stick to your guns until you get it. And to know it so fast."

"Didn't you?" Mission asked pointedly.

I laughed. "Yeah, even quicker than you did, I guess. But give me a break, I'm ten years older than you were."

"Nine," Mission said promptly. "But who's counting?"

I got in the shower soon after, soaking long and scrubbing every inch, shaving the bits that women do and using the cream Mira had insisted I get when I'd picked up my wedding dress. It smelled wonderful, and smoothed my skin to a healthy glow. She was going to help me do something with my hair, and I figured I'd better be dressed for that.

I pulled on the new tunic and breeches that I'd bought to go with the cape I was going to attach to the shoulders of my armor during the ceremony. The tunic was a deep blue silk, tight at the cuffs with slightly puffy sleeves. My locket picked up the color, glowing with an iridescent shine just below my collarbone. I belted the tunic over buff colored breeches and boots that matched. Tying on my pouch, I carefully checked to make sure Dad's ring was stowed in it. Canderous had handed it back to me the same night I'd tried to give it to him, saying he'd be honored to wear it, but wanted to wait until after we were officially wed.

I wasn't going to put on the cape or armor until just before the ceremony. Bastila's funeral was set for twilight, but Dxun has very long twilights; almost three hours. The wedding would take place at sunset; plenty of time to come back to the Phoenix and strap in; my attendants would help me. But Mira wanted to do my hair and makeup early, to make sure it was perfect; she could always touch things up later.

I rarely bothered with makeup, but trusted Mira to not make me look like anything but myself. And I did want my curls under control for the day; Dxun weather makes it snake around every which way. Mira arrived, cheerfully vulgar as always, and in under an hour I was amazed at what she'd done. I was still me, but better; my eyes looked somehow bigger and browner and my skin fairly glowed.

"You have to show me how to do that," I said, touching my reflection in awe. "I'm almost beautiful."

"You're a lot prettier than me," Mira scoffed. "You have that cuteness men love."

"Canderous doesn't care about cute," I scowled. "And you're gorgeous. I always wanted coloring like yours, and men certainly don't look at me the way they do you."

"You just don't show off your assets to your best advantage," she grinned. "Besides, while they're ogling your chest, you can hit them harder."

"I haven't noticed much hitting when you're with Dax," I said wickedly. "Wrestling, maybe."

"He's one of the rare ones I don't need to smack around," Mira said, but she came as close to blushing as I'd ever seen her.

"The hair looks fabulous," I said, giving her a minute to recover. "And it's not so full of pins I feel like I'm wearing a helm."

Using several substances I decided I was better off not identifying, she had managed to coax my hair into soft loose curls that framed my face instead of the willy-nilly mop of spirals they usually arranged themselves into. There were a couple of clips in there, I thought, but not a hairpin to be felt. I could even shake my head and not have the whole thing fall apart.

"I'll put some flowers in it when you change after the ceremony," Mira said gruffly. "You look gorgeous."

"Thank you," I said, giving her a huge hug.

"Ah, go on with you," she said, shrugging, but pleased. "I'm sure you have a million other things to do."

"Not really," I sighed. "The entire camp is conspiring to keep me from lifting a finger."

"Well, go take a walk, or something," Mira said. "Shake out the bridal nerves."

"I'm not nervous about getting married," I said honestly. "It's really only a formality now. I'm just worried something else will happen before we can actually get there."

"Nope," Mira said with certainty. "Only one crisis per wedding day; it's universal law."

"Gods, I hope you're right," I said freverently.

I took her advice, and walked around the camp. I had convinced Canderous to let me dispense with my usual honor guard escort until the ceremony, pointing out that everyone seemed to be needed to set things up, and we hardly needed the formality today. He relented when I promised I wouldn't leave camp unescorted, and had no reason to in any case. What I did want was some peace and quiet, some time to gather my thoughts. I finally found it in a corner of the camp that was rarely occupied, near where Kex had set up the quartermaster post. He wasn't there now, and the equipment was shrouded in tarps. I found a shady spot and sat on a barrel that was shoved up against the side of a building.

I was impatient for the ceremony to take place, excited that we would finally be married, and somewhat in shock to realize that it had only been about six or eight weeks since I had met Canderous. I'd only known him a day when I'd killed the Hutt in a rage, thinking that monster had killed my Mate.

But like Mission, I knew what I wanted, and where I belonged. Here, with Canderous, and the Mandoa, who had embraced me as the spirit of their people. I was still sort of getting my head around that concept, but I couldn't imagine being anywhere else, and I hugged that feeling to me.

In the quiet of my corner, I meditated a while, touching my connection to the Force, and feeling it ground me. Somewhere, just out of reach, but their warmth wrapping around my mind and soul, I thought I could feel my parents. I smiled, and just sat, slowly coming out of my trance.

"I wondered how long you would take," Stefan said, and I started. "Hiding?"

"Yes," I said, giving him a halfhearted scowl.

"Nervous?" He asked, sitting on the barrel next to me.

"No," I answered. "Just anxious for nothing else to go wrong."

"We blew a Sith warship out of the sky today," Stefan said with a quick smile. "I doubt any last minute seating crisis will top that."

"I was more worried about cannoks overrunning the wedding party, or Sith assassins showing up," I said dryly.

"Things do seem to happen around you," he said cheerfully. "But I don't think you have anything to worry about."

"Probably not," I agreed. "Canderous says I worry too much."

"He's likely right," Stefan nodded. "Since the only thing he seems to genuinely worry about himself is you, I expect you'll keep doing it though."

"He worries," I said sharply. "Just not where anyone else can see it."

"I wasn't disparaging your Mate," Stefan said gently. "It's perfectly obvious how much he loves you, and cares about his people. He's a good man, and I'm happy for both of you."

"Thank you," I said, a lump in my throat.

"Now don't cry, or Mira will have to fix you," Stefan teased. "You've always been beautiful, but today you're absolutely stunning."

"How did you know it was Mira?" I asked idiotically.

"Well, I know your distaste for dealing with cosmetics. Mira seemed most likely."

I looked at him, and he stared blandly back.

"What did you want?" I asked finally. "You didn't track me down to buck up bridal nerves."

"No," he acknowledged. "I'm not sure why I wanted to talk to you, really. I just needed to. I've been thinking about Miranne and Drake today a lot. Not surprising," he said with an expressive lift of one brow.

"Me too," I said softly.

"Well, yes, of course," Stefan said gently. "You have far more reason to today than I. I wonder, sometimes, what way Drake would torture me to death for what I did to you."

The admission came so unexpectedly that I started. "For what, sleeping with me?" I blurted before I could stop myself.

"Well, yes, that," Stefan said, unruffled, but I could see the faint pink on the tips of his ears. "No man wants to admit that his daughter is having an intimate relationship. At least not if they're being honest. For that alone, I expect I have much to answer for once I join Drake."

"Not for a long time, please," I said very quietly.

"Oh no, I don't intend to," he said, cheerful again. "I'll be around long enough to see you make me a great uncle several times over, and hopefully see them well grown. You'll be a wonderful mother."

"Thanks," I said, not sure how to take any of this.

"I'm not going to offer to give you away; it would be more irony than Canderous could take, and I don't have that right anyway," Stefan said suddenly. "I know it's crossed your mind, and I just wanted you to know I understand and approve of why you didn't ask."

"Okay," I said, mystified. I was grateful, mind, but completely thrown by this conversation. It wasn't like Stefan to jump around subjects like this; that was usually my job. Something was on his mind, and he wasn't giving me a clue what exactly it was.

"I told you I saw your auras, that day on Onderon," he said, shifting gears yet again. I was starting to get dizzy from all the conversation twists.

"You did," I nodded.

"I had some wild idea about asking you to come away with me," He looked suddenly subdued, "When I got here the other day. But today…when you fought with Canderous, I saw that aura again. It was magnificent, and so beautiful I wanted to weep." He paused, looking not at me, but somewhere in the distance, like he was reliving a memory. "Drake and Miranne had that, sort of, but theirs was different. Internal, focused on each other. Not in a selfish sort of way, but…they were complete together, and truly didn't need anyone else. They had friends, of course, but I was the only one they let get inside that little circle they shared. Until you were born."

"So you weren't in love with my mother?" I asked almost involuntarily. It was something I'd been dying to ask for a long time, and it popped out. Damn me and my mouth.

"Oh no," Stefan said, honestly surprised. "I loved her very much, of course, and Drake. But never like that. They were the best friends I ever had, or ever will. When Drake died, a part of me died with him. And I lost Miranne too. Because he was the other half of her, and I wasn't enough to keep her together. I chose to stay in the Order, when they left, as you know. It wasn't such a burden to me not to be able to marry or have a family. I had seen what they were, and knew I couldn't ever settle for less than that. Knowing how rare it was, I was content to share it a little, with them, and lead my life in service. Is any of this making sense?"

"More than you know," I said. "There's a point in here, somewhere, I hope?"

"I'm getting there," he promised. "So then one day, I run in to you, and you were so bright and fresh with so much of both of your parents that I was enchanted. And ashamed that I'd let my best friends' daughter struggle along, alone. So I made you promise to keep in touch, and found after a time that I loved you, for your own self, and not simply the shadow of my friends. I thought I'd found what they had had; that perfect little circle, with someone who was my other half. But I was wrong."

He took a slow breath, and looked at me straight on, his summer sky eyes serious and penetrating.

"I love you, Jennet. I always will. I wouldn't give up our time together for anything in the universe. But you and Canderous have something that will change the galaxy. Because the circle you share is bigger than anything I've seen. It's not a constricting thing that confines itself to the two of you; it grows and encompasses everyone you let in. You're such a generous soul, love, that it has room for everyone. I just hope that I'll always be part of it."

"You will," I said, trying hard not to cry. "I love you too."

"Now, love, don't cry and spoil that face for Canderous," Stefan said, handing me a handkerchief.

I was wrong; Disciple wasn't the only guy I knew that carried one. I had forgotten that habit of Stefan's. I patted my face, and refrained from blowing my nose.

"Thank you, my love, for everything," Stefan said softly. "You're a beautiful bride."

He kissed me then, warm and comforting, but it didn't make my toes tingle anymore. Then he was gone, whistling something cheerful as he strode away. I sat a minute, getting my face back under control.

"You can come out now," I said, and Canderous came around the opposite corner. "How much did you hear?"

"Pretty much everything from 'wild idea of asking you to come away with me," he grumbled. "I almost ran out and killed him then. But I figured you wouldn't approve."

"No," I said, with a watery chuckle.

"How long have you known I was there?" he asked.

"Not long. I was distracted. Just before he kissed me, I think. I didn't expect him to do that." I said apologetically.

"I know," he said gruffly. "I could see your face; you looked pretty surprised. And I could feel you, anyway."

"Why aren't you mad?" I asked curiously.

"What's there to be mad about?" He countered. "He was saying goodbye, after all, and admitting you're with the better man. I'm generous enough not to kick a man when he's down."

"Banthashit," I said succinctly.

He looked at me a moment, then chuckled ruefully. "All right, I didn't like it at all. But it was obvious you needed to hear what he was saying, so I was willing to let it slide. Interesting what he said about us, though."

"Very. I don't see us changing the galaxy," I said, still puzzled over that one.

"Whatever helps him sleep at night," he shrugged. "But, Wildcat, I sincerely hope that was the last man you'll kiss besides me."

"I have no intention of kissing anyone else," I assured him.

"That," he said dryly, "was not what I meant."

I hopped off my barrel, and jumped lightly up to stand on it. It was interesting being higher than eye level with him. He stood close, and allowed me to kiss him slowly, teasing his mouth until he groaned faintly and plucked me off the barrel, wrapping his arms tightly around me. I sighed and molded myself against him.

He set me down abruptly, and growled, "The next time I do that, we'll have the same name."

Tweaking a curl in passing, he strode off into the depths of the camp. I grinned happily and headed back to the Phoenix.


	70. Chapter 70

I looked in on Lorna, up to her eyebrows in food preparation, who assured me she needed no help and everything was going smoothly. There was a detail setting up chairs and benches on the battlefield for the guests to sit, and a sort of alter on a raised platform where the ceremony would take place. Even with the Phoenix parked at the far end of the large field, there was plenty of room for everyone. I couldn't think of anything to do, and sat on a stray chair, restless and wishing the hours would hurry up and pass.

Visas glided up, and sat next to me, looking cool and calm as ever. I was considering going into the Phoenix before my face melted off. The environmental controls kept things nice and cool. She turned to me and smiled.

"You should," she said in her low almost throaty voice. "It's cooler there, and there will be less for Mira to touch up before your wedding."

I'd gotten used to Canderous answering my unspoken thoughts, and knew Visas was a Seer, so I wasn't as surprised at her comment as I might have been.

"What's on your mind?" I asked curiously.

"Nothing at all, I'm happy to say," the Miraluka said with a touch of laughter. "I just wanted you to know that. I foresee no more surprises for you today, at least none that will do any harm."

A tension I'd been trying to hide relaxed, and my neck instantly felt looser. "Oh, thank the Gods," I said sincerely. "Thank you."

"It is no trouble," Visas said, smiling at me. "I thought you would like to know."

"Are you ever wrong?" I asked curiously.

"Rarely," she said simply, shrugging. "It is an art, the Seeing. I am more skilled than most. The important visions often come unbidden. But like any Seer, I am most often clouded when I try to See for myself."

"How frustrating," I said sympathetically.

"It can be," she said softly. "But I understand the wisdom of it. One cannot make choices or improve if you know your destiny beforehand."

"Doesn't that apply to those you See _for_?" I asked, puzzled.

"I could tell you what is in your future," Visas said quietly. "But I am only compelled to speak when it is a crossroads, where the outcome is important. Do you want to know what else I See?"

"No," I said thoughtfully. "I don't."

"Then you are wiser than most." She patted my shoulder, and smiled. "Go get out of the sun, and eat. It will help you, and the child."

"The _what_?!" I yelped, standing up so quickly I knocked my chair over.

"I thought you knew," Visas said, puzzled and suddenly agitated. "It's all over your aura that you did….Ah," she said, understanding curving her mouth. "You kept it from yourself. And Canderous doesn't know yet."

"I can't be pregnant," I said firmly. "I'd know. And Canderous is sterile, you know that. He hasn't reversed it yet. Impossible."

"Not for you," she said serenely. "You healed him when his throat was cut, yes? It was uncontrolled, and powerful. It mended many things in him, conditions he was unaware of."

"What do you mean?" I asked suspiciously.

"His heart, his brain. Years of battle had taken a toll on him; your healing mended them, and his sterility. I am sorry, I didn't mean to spring it on you like this," she said, distressed. "I thought you knew."

"So you're not always right," I said a little sharply. "I'm sorry," I apologized immediately. "That wasn't fair of me."

"It's all right," Visas said, her voice calm again.

"This is the last thing I need right now," I said a little bitterly. "He won't let me go with him when he joins the Republic now."

"He will," Visas said with certainty. "Mandalorians take their families along all the time."

"Not Canderous," I said. "He didn't let his first wife go."

"She was not a warrior, or as necessary to him and his people," Visas pointed out. "The child will be born by then, and your healing will speed your recovery. There will be many who will be willing to travel with you, to protect your daughter while you fight. And you will both come home to finish rebuilding your people."

"We will?" I whispered.

"Oh yes," Visas said. "How you get there is up to you."

"A daughter?" I said, wonder in my voice as what she said hit me. "It's a girl?"

"This one," Visas said, smiling. "She'll look like you, but with her father's eyes. And temper," she added with a laugh.

"This one?" I repeated, eyebrows raised.

"I've said enough," Visas said sternly. "Suffice to say you'll have many children. How fortunate Canderous is building a large house. Perhaps he's a bit of a Seer too."

"Or just optimistic," I said, smiling.

"A dreamer," Visas said serenely. "The universe needs them. He dreams large; it's a good thing."

"Canderous, a dreamer?" I said with no little surprise. "He's the most terrifyingly practical person I know."

"That is the best sort of dreamer," Visas veiled eyes seemed to penetrate through to my very soul. "It is the kind that makes them come true. You should know that."

"Yes," I said simply. "I guess I do. Can I ask one more thing?"

"I cannot promise to answer," she said.

"Will any of my children be Jedi?" I held my breath, not sure what I wanted the answer to be.

She looked at me consideringly for a long moment. "At least one will be as powerful as you and Canderous," she said after a moment. "More than that I cannot say."

"Canderous is not Jedi," I said a little uncertainly.

"No," she answered. "He isn't, nor will ever be. But his is a unique soul, and he has the heart of what a true Jedi should be. He cares more than he knows, and risks all he is."

"Yes," I said, smiling. "He does." I leaned over and kissed Visas' cheek. "Thank you."

She nodded, and I made my way to the Phoenix, wondering how in the galaxy I was going to tell Canderous he was a father again.

I had tuned in enough to know he was already there, cleaning his armor and preparing to shower and dress. He'd been in his oldest work clothes earlier, unlike myself in my silk tunic; comfortable and scruffy, the way I love him best. I found him in the garage, mending an arm piece at the workbench. His beautifully crafted and polished armor looked a little odd next to the battered and scarred Helm, but it suited him.

"You have news," He said after kissing me briefly. "It's all over your face."

I'd been blocking him, not wanting to give anything away. I smiled. "Yes."

"Jarxel and Visas announce their engagement?" He asked, turning to the bench and making a final adjustment. "Mira and Dax run off to Tatooine? Lorna beat up any more of my warriors?" he tossed the possibilities casually over his shoulder, puzzled why I was blocking him.

"No," I said, and came up behind him, wrapping my arms around his waist and leaning my head against his back. He turned, and held me tight, letting me listen to his heartbeat.

"Well something's got you glowing like a lightsaber," he said gruffly.

"I'm pregnant," I said, and felt him go very still.

"You can't be," he said after a moment. "I haven't had my sterility reversed."

"Apparently, I healed you," I said, and told him what Visas had seen.

"And your ability to keep yourself from conceiving?" he asked quietly.

"I guess I wanted this," I said, not looking at him. "I didn't mean to consciously."

He slipped his hand under my chin and tilted my face up to look at him. "I knew about my heart," he said very softly. "I was going to have something done about it once things were more settled. But when the Elders gave me the physical, nothing showed up, and I wondered about it. Didn't bother to tell you as the point seemed moot. I made Disciple give me a good look-over, and he didn't find anything either. Chalked it up to luck and your healing, and forgot about it. It never occurred to me to check anything else."

"Are you sorry?" I asked in a whisper.

"Never," he said with utter conviction, his blue eyes alight with wonder. "This is the best wedding present you could ever give me."

"Will you make me stay behind when you go to fight?" I asked, putting a hand on his chest as he bent to kiss me.

He stopped, and looked at me, his eyes narrowing. "I want to," he admitted. "But I don't see how I'd manage it. And we need you there."

"I won't leave our family alone when we go," I said. "I won't be separated from our child."

"Lorna would come," Canderous said with a grin. "Just give her a big spoon, and she'd fight off a ship full of Sith."

"That's an idea," I said thoughtfully, and then remembered something she'd said this morning. "I think she knows already," I said slowly. "She said something about me needing to keep my strength up."

"Wouldn't surprise me," he said with a snort. "Elder Evana too. Hell, half the women in the camp probably knew it before you did."

"I don't think so," I said, shrugging. "Just Visas, Elder Evana and Lorna. But then, one is a Seer, and the other two have had children, I think. Megari might suspect."

"A father," Canderous said very softly. "I hope I do better this time."

"You'll be fine," I said, smiling. "Just love her."

"It's a girl?" he said, surprised. "How do you know?"

"Visas told me. I asked. Do you mind knowing?" I asked with concern.

"No," he said, and set be back a little, one hand on my still flat stomach. "Saves time thinking of names."

"I was thinking Helen," I said softly. "Helen Miranne, for her grandmothers."

"That's perfect," he said, and kissed me.


	71. Chapter 71

Author's note: We're getting close, people. Two more chapters (including this one) and then the wedding. I promise. I'm planning an epilogue after that, and then...wow, it's done. Sort of a shock, actually. I was concerned about the baby thing, and had actually been debating putting it in or not almost from the beginning. I just hope it didn't scream 'PLOT TWIST!' to anyone reading it :0)

Thanks again, everyone, for your comments and support. Don't stop now, please!

Always, LJ

* * *

**Canderous**

We hadn't shared our news about Jennet's pregnancy yet. It was proving to be an extraordinarily full day and we wanted just a little time to keep it to ourselves. We agreed to announce it when we had our attendants at hand, while we were donning armor and doing the last minute preparations. Jennet had wanted to announce it together, but I pointed out it would likely come out during the ceremony itself. I'd seen it before, and Elder Evana almost certainly knew. She agreed that she did want to tell her friends personally, and said that the fuss of bridal primping – my word, which she scowled at - was the best time she could think of. Telling the men of the wedding party would be up to me.

The thought of watching Jennet grow big with our child was incredible to me. I had thought once I would never experience fatherhood again, and was glad of it; I had nothing to offer a child, I thought, or any interest in a permanent relationship that might produce one. I had found myself wanting it again when I met Jennet. Of course, I had not expected it would be quite so soon, but I was enormously pleased at the prospect. I promised myself that this time, I would not miss anything.

Jennet herself was more than a little dazed about it and was struggling to come to grips with the idea. I could hear stray thoughts coming through about not having a clue about babies. I was amused; in this I had the experience. She had had very little exposure to infants, being an only child herself and moving around a lot growing up. She was already promising herself to quiz every mother she knew about what to expect. She was projecting more than usual for the rest of the day, at odd times while I showered and dressed and prepared for both the funeral and wedding.

_Relax, Wildcat, _I soothed her. _It's going to be fine. You'll be a fine mother._

_But I don't know what to _do, she answered, a little panicked. _I don't know anything about babies. I don't know how fat I'll get, or what labor's supposed to be like, or how much to feed them or _anything.

_No one knows much of that the first time, _I assured her. _You have plenty of time to learn._

_I'm going to get fat,_ she wailed at one point as I was shaving.

_You'll look beautiful._

_You have to say that; it's your baby._

_I say it because it's true, _I laughed back.

_Oh shut up, _she sniffled, but I could feel her smile.

There was a small flat-topped hill not far from the camp, and that is where I suggested Bastila's funeral be held. Close enough to reach easily by twilight and torches, far enough away to be private and completely separate from the wedding. We took along the honor guard for caution; the beasts in the jungle can get restless near dark.

We made our way to the hill, everyone carrying a torch. The Jedi were all in their best robes, even Mira had donned a set. Jennet was in her wedding garb of new tunic and breeches, minus armor, as was I. We were very similarly dressed, except my tunic was a deep red. I was pleased with her choices of clothing for us; dark blue and red were the colors of my clan. The locket around Jennet's throat caught the flicker of the torchlight and seemed to glow in the dimness.

We didn't have a proper funeral dais, so the Jedi had decided to sacrifice the gurney from the Phoenix to substitute, knowing I'd approve. On a practical level, this made it easier to transport her to the site; the gurney could both roll and float on its anti-grav units. Jolee, Carth, Mission, Stefan, Dustil, and Ladria served as pallbearers. Ladria had asked me to serve as well, but after some thought, I had refused. I did regret her death to some degree, and had known her longer than most of the Jedi, but I didn't want to seem as if I was reproaching Jennet, and hadn't been very close to Bastila in any case. Ladria understood, and chose to take my place.

Someone, Ladria and Visas most likely, had cleansed and dressed Bastila's body in her formal robes, carefully arranging it so that the slash Jennet had dealt her across the throat didn't show. Her 'saber was in her hand. She lay in a large metal basin, vaguely coffin shaped, that had been hastily fashioned by Bao Dur. We reached the top of the hill, and the gurney's wheels were locked in place by the Iridonian.

Jolee stepped forward. "We are here to release the soul of our sister in the Order, Bastila Shan. May she find peace and solace in the Force. Let her spirit soar."

It was a simple speech, and everyone around me nodded as they intoned "Let her spirit soar; may she find peace in the Force." Jennet's voice was vibrating with intensity, and I put an arm around her.

Disciple moved to stand next to Jolee, and sprinkled several vials of chemicals over the body. I could identify most of them by smell; they were used to make a fire burn hot and quick, intense enough to consume flesh and bone in a matter of minutes. Then all the Jedi stepped up, and thrust their torches into the coffin.

The fire roared, and everyone stepped back quickly. We watched as Bastila's body was consumed, the fire lighting up the clearing. In about a quarter of an hour, everything was reduced to ash, except the mangled metal lump of her lightsaber. Disciple poured more chemicals over the whole, and I saw the wisps of smoke die. Producing a small brush, he carefully swept the remains, including the damaged lightsaber, into a small urn and sealed it, his face somber. He handed it to Jolee, who shook his head and gave it to Stefan.

"She was my friend," Jolee said quietly. "But I didn't know her as well as you. I think you would have a better idea what she would want done with her ashes."

Stefan swallowed visibly, the only time I'd seen him unsure of himself. "I think she should rest beside her parents," he said softly after a moment. "I understand she recovered her father's remains from Tatooine and buried them both on Coruscant."

Jolee nodded. "A good choice, son," and there was a murmur of agreement all around.

We all stood for a moment, silent, letting the moment sink in. Then without speaking, we left the clearing and made our way back to camp. I turned back before I climbed down from the clearing, and looked at the gurney, standing alone and still in the growing darkness. She'd been a Hero of the Republic, even if she hadn't wanted it, or deserved it. I could honor a fallen comrade. And a part of me admired her cleverness and strength of will. She had been a worthy opponent. I saluted her funeral pyre, and made my way down the hill.

Everyone was quiet for a while as we picked our way through the jungle. About halfway there, Mission spoke.

"I remember she tripped me once, on Tatooine. I was bugging her about using her Force abilities for fun, you know, like making someone run into a wall or getting back at Revan for teasing her. She insisted that the Force was too sacred to use for frivolous tricks, and I told her to lighten up, the Force had a sense of humor. The next thing I knew I was eating sand and wondering how I got there. I accused her of tripping me, and she just told me not to be so clumsy. But she was smiling."

"Yeah, she had a very dry sense of humor," Jolee said. "Almost wasn't there at all, and then she'd hit you with something that took you a couple of days to figure out she'd been joking. She told me once, very seriously, that she had proof I was bald because I left the Order. Sent me datalinks and everything. Never laughed so hard when I figured out she was teasing me."

"She sacrificed herself on the Leviathan, to save Revan and me," Carth said quietly. "I can't help but feel somewhat responsible for her fall."

"You had nothing to do with that," Ladria said fiercely. "She made her choices, and Revan and you did all you could. If anyone failed her, it was the Order itself; and even then I can't blame them; what she did was without precedence. No one had ever heard of cloaking your aura with another's."

"I'm afraid that's not necessarily so," Disciple said unexpectedly. "There is a training that very few Jedi have undertaken. It's an ancient one, developed when the true Sith were gone, when the Jedi would infiltrate the new Sith order ranks, for various reasons: espionage, rescue, double agents and the like. But the technique, as far as I could tell, was based on bringing forth the darkness of your own aura, to travel among the enemy undetected of your true purpose. It hasn't been used for centuries; too dangerous, and many agents of the Order were lost to the dark side using it. The records are spotty, and don't give the full extent of the training. But she did have access to it, and spent a great deal of time in the archives, both before and after the Star Forge mission. I found what was left of the records on Dantooine."

"That's not the same as what she did," Visas said quietly. "And she must have been cloaking herself from the time Revan thought she'd been redeemed."

"She was extremely intelligent," Disciple pointed out. "If she'd read those records before the Star Forge mission, she likely used that knowledge combined with her bond to Revan to mask her intentions immediately. She was patient, for all her seeming to appear otherwise."

"True," Ladria said thoughtfully. "Unfortunately, we're going to have to develop new ways to screen Order members, to ensure something like this doesn't happen again."

"Perhaps," Stefan said, shrugging. "Or perhaps not. I think we can agree that Bastila's was a unique situation, and unlikely to repeat itself any time soon. We'll have time to assess how far this has affected the balance of the Force."

"You Jedi can do that," Mission said fiercely. "I just know that I lost a friend, and I don't really know why."

She flounced away with quick angry strides, Dustil hurrying his steps to catch up to her. We were at the gates now, so I didn't try to call her back for safety. Jennet, with a reproachful look over her shoulder, hurried to join the Twi'lik, Carth at her heels.

"You know," I said conversationally, "I am probably the least surprised of all of you that Bastila wasn't what she appeared. I understand what this development could mean to the Order, and until recently I could give a frak what Jedi want to debate. Not that you want my opinion, but I think you are too worried about the meaning of the universe. Take that talk to your Council. You lost a friend and sister at arms; deal with that, and move on."

With that, I strode after Jennet, leaving speechless Jedi in my wake.

It took a little time to calm Mission down, and eventually the Jedi caught up, looking subdued and ashamed. They apologized, and Mission graciously accepted, and things were back to normal. Personally, I sometimes found Mission and for that matter, Jennet, a little too emotional at times, but I'd come to recognize that this wasn't the weakness I'd been raised to believe it was. The Jedi, however, should know better, and I was a bit peeved at their insensitivity. They tread carefully around me for a few minutes, but I shrugged it off, and after a half hour or so we split off to prepare for the wedding.

Ladria had offered the Ebon Hawk for me to get ready in, and not wanting to intrude on the women changing and doing whatever females do on board the Phoenix, I'd accepted. Jarxel had transferred my armor there during the funeral. The honor guard was split between the two ships with Zuka, Kelborn, and Tagren standing guard outside the Ebon Hawk, Dax, Kex, and Xarga at the Phoenix.

Jarxel settled the cape Jennet had commissioned on Onderon over my armor, clipping a corner to each shoulder. I had to admit it was a dramatic effect; the cape was basically a large rectangle, silver facing out, lined in dark red silk. It draped between my shoulder blades and swept almost to my heels. My clan badge was embroidered on the back, looking ready to scream away into the night. My Wildcat had done well; it wasn't fussy or too showy, and stayed out of the way if I actually had to fight.

"Well, old friend, you ready?" Jarxel asked as he smoothed out the fabric so it hung straight.

"As I'll ever be," I shrugged.

"She's a fine woman," Jarxel said, his craggy face creasing into a grin. "A credit to the Mandoa. I'm proud of you."

I stared at him, astonished. "You've never said that before," I said gruffly.

"You never brought as much honor to the Mandoa before," he said, equally gruff. "She's the best of us, and not even born to it. You two will make us strong again; you've already made us proud."

"Prepare to be prouder," I said, smiling. "You'll be a godfather in about eight months."

"I knew that already," he said, grinning. "I was wondering when Jennet would get around to telling you."

"Visas?" I asked, eyebrow raised.

"Yeah, she told me. Thought Jennet already knew, actually. But she warned me not to say anything until you did. When did the Lady tell you?"

"Earlier today. Visas let it slip; Jennet had no idea until then. We're very pleased, of course. Timing could have been better," I said a little regretfully.

"It's never a perfect time for birth or death," Jarxel said practically. "Both just happen when it's supposed to." I nodded in agreement.

It doesn't take long to suit up, really, so Jarxel and I joined the others in the common area, sitting around, joking and having a quick drink before taking our places at the ceremony. I knew Jennet and her attendants would need much more time to get ready, so we simply enjoyed some male only company. I was impatient to get on with it, and looked at the clock every few minutes. Finally, I put my back to it, and wondered how Jennet was doing. She wasn't blocking me, exactly, but was busy and wasn't projecting as clearly as she had earlier.

Jarxel gave a toast to my soon to be lost bachelorhood, following up with one to my impending fatherhood. Back slaps and shouted congratulations to both rang around the cabin, and Jarxel went to tell the honor guard about the baby. They were very pleased, he reported back, and comments about the new addition's possible fighting skills were in heated debate. Every one of them wanted to be in on her training. I laughed.

"Trust them all to have their priorities right," I said, and raised my glass. "To Helen, who will be the most spoiled kid and ferocious warrior in the galaxy," I said, and everyone drank, roaring with laughter.


	72. Chapter 72

Author's note: Okay, I lied. The wedding _is_ next, I promise. But there might be a chapter or two after that before the epilogue. I can't help it; Jennet just won't shut up. Hope this isn't too much of a disappointment :0)

As always, please review, if so inclined; I love to hear from readers. Thank you so much, everyone!

Always, LJ

* * *

**Jennet**

The fuss in getting ready was unbelievable; six women buzzing around, cosmetics strewn everywhere, hairbrushes and combs tossed on countertops. I was mostly ready, of course, but Mira insisted in touching up my face and hair before helping me strap into my armor. She and Ladria attached the cape, which swept dramatically to my heels. I was pleased; the dressmaker had done an excellent job with the phoenix embroidery. I'd made Canderous let Atton take a holo of his tattoo before I'd commissioned the wedding clothes, thinking it would be nice to have the badge somewhere on our persons. I hadn't even known it _was_ a phoenix at the time. My cape was lined in blue, the same silk as my tunic. Elder Evana had helped a great deal in choosing the fabrics and colors.

Everyone else was adjusting their robes, shining boots, tending their hair. Megari looked lovely in a pale lavender dress that made her hair look a rich and even darker sable, her skin fairly glowing, and her eyes go a deep amethyst. Little Danni, who was, astonishingly, chatting away, had on a similar outfit, and she looked as pretty as her mother. Even her rag doll had a new dress, and I smiled. Danni had refused to part with her toy, and I was charmed.

Lorna, who was not a warrior, was in a simple tunic dress of deep green, her graying brown hair neatly done in a coronet of braids on top of her head. Except the hair, she didn't look any older than Canderous, yet I knew she was easily old enough to be his mother. She was flushed and excited as any of the younger women, and doing double duty keeping an eye on Danni as her mother dressed. I resisted the temptation to give her a spoon to carry by way of a weapon, but couldn't help but tease her about it.

"I was a bit of a disappointment to my family," she confided with a motherly smile when I mentioned this. "I was always better in the kitchen than the battlefield. But give me a frying pan and I'll defend my territory to the death!" She laughed, a hearty infectious sound that made all of us join in.

"Besides," she said, an impish look on her face, "no one complained about my lack of fighting skills when they were hungry after a battle. Good cooks are worth their weight in gold in an army."

I had to agree, and told her so. She beamed. "I knew the minute I saw you that you were the Lady of the Mandoa. You have sense that most warriors lack. The Mandalore has found a match in you."

Mira was in proper Jedi robes, which looked good on her but very different than her usual more provocative garb. I asked her about it, and she shrugged.

"I suppose I ought to look more the part," she said. "You did say be in fighting gear, at least for the ceremony."

"You've never worn them before," I said, smiling. "I kind of miss the other, though."

"I can wear that, if you prefer," she said, and I was astonished that she seemed a little anxious.

"No, it's okay," I assured her. "I was just teasing. Wear whatever you feel best in."

"Oh, thank the Gods," she said in relief, grinning. "I'll go change. I'll have to get used to Jedi robes, I guess, but they are _so_ not my style. I didn't want to wear my regular stuff earlier though, it seemed…disrespectful. Even though I didn't know her. You know?"

"Yeah, I do." I gave her a friendly pat, and she ran off to change.

Ladria laughed. "The Order is a much more interesting group now," she said rather fondly as we watched Mira zoom out of the Phoenix to grab her stuff from the Ebon Hawk. "An ex-bounty hunter with a refreshing lack of pretension, a scholar-cum-soldier, a former Jedi hunter, an Iridonian mechanic, a Miraluka, and an exile. Not to mention Jolee and Stefan, both of who are characters in their own right."

"And a former Sith Lord," I added.

"Yes," Ladria suddenly looked sober. "If she's alive."

"She is," I said positively. "Visas would know if she wasn't. Or, I think, Carth. You'll find her."

"I intend to," Ladria said briskly. "Thanks to you, I'll have a place to start looking."

Mission wandered over, looking very pretty in traditional Twi'lik dancing garb of a lustrous dark blue, almost the same shade as my tunic. It set off her skin beautifully. She had a blaster on one hip and a sword on the other which should of looked odd with the costume, but on her didn't.

"I don't have any nice looking fighting gear," she lamented. "Will this be okay?"

"Perfect," I said, and hugged her.

"You look beautiful," she smiled, and hugged me back fiercely. "I know you're going to be very happy."

"I already am," I assured her.

I looked around for Visas, who was calm in the midst of all the chaos, looking regal and gorgeous as always in her red robes, lightsaber on her belt. She smiled at me across the room, and glided over to give me a hug as well.

"A half hour until sunset," she said softly. "Shall we have a drink?"

"Please," I said gratefully.

We gathered in the common area and I was just thinking about how to bring up the baby when Mira swept in like a whirlwind, battle gear slung over her shoulder and a ferocious frown on her face.

"Is there something you'd like to share with us?" she demanded, scowling at me. "I mean, we're your friends, right?"

"I was waiting for you to get back," I protested, knowing she must have heard something from the men. "I wasn't keeping things a secret, honest."

"What?" Mission asked, looking back and forth between us.

"She's pregnant," Mira announced, breaking into a huge smile, dropping her gear and running over to throw her arms around me.

There was a gasp of surprise, and everyone started talking at once, except Visas, who stood, quiet and calmly, a cat smile on her face.

"I knew it!" Lorna crowed, and hugged me so hard breathing became an issue.

"I thought you might be," Megari said softly as she hugged me in her turn. "I'm so glad for you."

"The guys were all talking about it when I went over there," Mira said. "Apparently the honor guard is already planning her weapons training and debating if she'll be as fast as her mother."

"Faster," I said, grinning. "She's half Mandalorian; it's in the blood."

"Ondorians are warriors too," Mira pointed out. "And Mandalorians are a lot bigger. They're strong, but not nearly as fast as you."

"I just hope she gets some of her father's height," I laughed.

"So it's a girl for certain?" Mission asked.

"So says Visas. I don't argue with a Miraluka," I grinned at Visas, who smiled her gentle smile back.

"Thought of any names yet?" Mira demanded.

"Helen," I answered. "Helen Miranne. For her grandmothers," I explained.

"Ohhhh, pretty," Mission enthused, and everyone nodded.

"She's going to have an extraordinarily extended family," Ladria smiled.

"That she is," I said happily. "How many children have half the Jedi Order as aunts and uncles, and a whole camp full of Mandalorians to spoil her rotten?"

"Hey, what about me and Megari?" Mission said, scowling at me, but I could see her mouth twitching.

"I was saving the best for last," I said, which earned me sunny smiles from those two, and loud mock protests from the others.

Satisfied at the commotion she'd caused, Mira disappeared to change, coming out looking much more like herself in her usual skimpy battle dress. I noticed that everything was clean and polished, and she'd taken pains with her hair and makeup. I complimented her warmly, and we all had a drink, waiting for the signal to leave.

Danni, who had been so animated she seemed almost a different child, wandered over to me, one tiny finger stuck in her mouth, the other hand clutching her doll. Taking her hand away from her mouth, she reached out and touched my stomach.

"Baby," she announced, and smiled up at me.

"That's right, sweetie," I said, and put out my arms, inviting her to climb up. She hadn't done that before with me, but I kept trying. To my intense gratification, she reached up, and I scooped her into my lap. She snuggled, and I held her close.

"Baby girl," she said, turning in my arms to put a hand against my belly. "Pretty." She looked up at me, her big purple eyes wide and smiling. "Like you."

"Oh," I said, my voice very small and a catch in my throat. "Thank you, darling."

She allowed me to hug her, then wiggled to get down. "Mama, I play with baby?"

Megari smiled. "It will be a while, sweetheart, before she's here and is big enough to play with."

"That's okay," she said complacently. "Bao Dur give me a brother."

Megari went suddenly scarlet, and we all fought not to laugh. But being the magnificent mother she is, she simply said, "I think you'd better wait for Jennet's baby, honey."

"Okay," the little girl said cheerfully, and took her doll to a corner to play.

There was a shifting as we all gave Megari a minute to get her face back to normal, and I motioned Visas over.

"She seemed awfully sure of the baby," I said quietly. "Of course, she heard the whole thing, but that remark after…I wondered if she has Seer ability."

"I've talked to Megari about it," Visas said smoothly. "I think she does. Megari has agreed that it should be nurtured. It's not an easy thing to live with, you know. But it's much worse if you're alone trying to make sense of what you See. I would not wish that on any child. I will help her, of course. She's a joy to be with."

"Definitely," I agreed.

Dax's voice boomed through the cabin. "Time to line up, my Lady." he shouted. "Ceremony's about to begin."

"You can come in, we're all decent," Mira shouted back, amused.

"We'll just meet you outside," Dax answered, and we laughed.

I looked around the cabin, seeing that everyone had thoughtfully tidied up after themselves. There would be another flurry of dressing after the wedding, when everyone changed into more comfortable clothes for the reception. It seemed easiest to keep it as an impromptu women's dorm for now. Megari, Mission, and Lorna wouldn't need it, but the others had said they would like to at least get out of whatever armor or heavy robes they were wearing. They had promised to take their things back to the Ebon Hawk before joining the party.

I smiled warmly at everyone. "We're ready," I said, and led us out of the Phoenix.


	73. Chapter 73

Author's note: Well, here it is, the wedding. I'd love to hear your comments. Enjoy!

Always, LJ

* * *

The three honor guard members who had been outside the Phoenix escorted the eight of us to the back of the seating area. There were no flowers, or bunting, or any trimmings associated with a wedding. The chairs were scavenged from all over the camp, and at least half of the guests were standing. But everyone had made an effort to look sharp and polished, and the smiles directed at me and my attendants were genuinely delighted. The three Elders stood at the alter, resplendent in formal tunics, or in Elder Evana's case, tunic dress. She had her hair in a high coronet on top of her head, two chains hanging from it, attaching a wimple-like veil that hung gracefully just under her chin.

And at the front stood Canderous, looking splendid in his armor, Helm under his arm, cape sweeping his heels, with Jarxel on his right. Carth, Atton, Bao Dur, Jolee, Dustil, and Disciple were in their best armor and robes, looking scrubbed and handsome. I spotted Stefan in the front row, the only family of the bride, smiling and genuinely pleased. The honor guard had marched ahead of us down the aisle, spacing themselves evenly along it, and were standing at parade rest.

I could not have asked for a more beautiful wedding.

The pipes and drum began their cadence, and Danni walked the aisle between the crowded chairs, strewing dried flower petals, - the only concession to my traditions - with professional precision, doll clutched firmly under her arm. Megari followed at a stately pace, keeping a sharp eye on her daughter. Lorna came next, beaming, followed by Ladria, Visas, Mission, and Mira. I swear I saw Mira wink at Dax as she passed him, but good soldier that he was, he never twitched. He was on my side of the aisle, the place of my Champion. Kelborn, the highest rank in the honor guard, was directly across from him. The women took their places on the left side, turning to wait for me. In the absence of flowers, they clasped their hands lightly in front of them.

Then the music changed, and I recognized after a moment the traditional wedding music of Onderon, laboriously played on pipes, but recognizable. Canderous must have insisted on it, and I threatened to dissolve into a puddle right there. I looked up, and his blue eyes were practically glowing at me. I straightened my spine and walked down the aisle.

_That's my girl,_ I heard, and I fixed my eyes on his.

I now understood why there are usually flowers at a wedding; it gives your hands something to do. I don't like swinging my arms at my sides, so I kept one on the hilt of my right sword as I approached. I hoped the other wasn't dangling like a broken pendulum. Then Canderous smiled, and I forgot everything but the fact that I was really here now, we were getting married, and that was the happiest thought in the universe.

_You look beautiful, cyar'ika. I'm sorry I didn't say so earlier._

_You were distracted. I forgive you, _I answered, and smiled.

The pipes and drum stopped, and I halted, still smiling at Canderous. He winked back, and I stifled a giggle.

"Who approaches this sacred ground?" Elder Evana asked in a clear voice.

"Jennet Adriadne Jax, betrothed of the Mandalore," I answered, managing to keep my voice strong without shouting.

"Stand forth, and be recognized," she said, and I took the last two steps. She nodded, and all three Elders bowed to me.

"Canderous Calder Ordo, our Mandalore, do you claim Jennet Adriadne Jax as your Mate?" Elder Evana turned her attention to Canderous.

"I do," he said in a clear, deep voice, and I felt my toes tingle.

"Jennet Adriadne Jax," Elder Evana said, turning to me, "Do you claim the Mandalore as your Mate?"

"I do," I answered, glowing with the words.

"And by what proof do the both of you base this?" She challenged.

"We have stood the Trials, and by the Elder's judgment, she is proved to be my Mate, and I hers." Canderous said.

"I concur," I added.

"Let it be known to this company," intoned Elder Gregor, "That the Trials have proved this is so."

"Mandalore, you may claim your Mate," Elder Evan said.

Canderous carefully placed the Helm on a stand behind him, stepped over to me, and took my hand. I looked into his blue eyes and saw everything I ever wanted. I discretely as possible sniffled.

_Don't cry now, Wildcat, _Canderous sounded amused.

_I'm not, _I lied.

"Who will give the histories of this man and this woman, that their families be bound to the Clan?" Elder Drane said in his raspy voice.

"I will," and to my surprise, Disciple stepped forward. I had known that he had gathered the information, but thought it would be Jarxel who would be reciting it.

_He did the work, he should get the credit, _Canderous said in my head. _Jarxel has other duties._

_That was generous of you, _I said approvingly.

_I like the kid, _he said, giving a mental shrug. _And he deserves it._

Disciple read out the family histories in his clear precise voice, making even the boring list sound rather dramatic. I was proud of him, and gave him a brilliant smile around the bulk of my Mate. He blushed a little, but smiled back. Elder Evana nodded at him, and he returned to his place in line.

"Who here will bear witness to this union, and swear to any who challenge it of its truth?" Elder Evana called.

"I will," Jarxel said, stepping forward.

"And I," Mira moved to stand by him.

"You are charged by the Clans to keep this truth, and stand against any who may challenge it. Are you prepared to do so?" Elder Gregor stepped in front of them and glowered as if they might say no. I refrained again from giggling.

"I am," Mira and Jarxel said together.

"Then make your mark." He held out a datapad, and each of them placed their palms against it. "Let the company know that there are witnesses to this union, and they swear to its truth." He moved to Elder Evana's side.

"And now, Jennet Adriadne Jax, do you swear to bring honor to this man, to fight with him, and for him, to defend his Clan, follow him, and cherish him to the last breath of your body?"

_And love you, _I added silently. "I do so swear," I said aloud.

"Canderous Calder Ordo, do you swear to bring honor to this woman, to fight with her, and for her, to defend her Clan, follow her, and cherish her to the last breath of your body?"

_And love you, _he said, warm in my head. _Always that. _"I do so swear."

"Do you, Canderous, our Mandalore, vow to shed your blood in defense of your Mate, to become one flesh, one mind, one soul?"

"I do so vow."

"Do you, Jennet, Lady of the Mandoa, vow to shed your blood in defense of your Mate, to become one flesh, one mind, one soul?"

"I do so vow."

"You may exchange rings," Elder Evana said, and a murmur rippled through the warriors behind us.

Mira handed me my father's ring, which she had stowed in a pocket. I had given it to her earlier, not sure if I could trust my hands fumbling in a pouch. I took Canderous' big hand in mine, and slipped it onto the third finger of his left hand.

"I give you this ring as a symbol of my eternal devotion and love," I said, and suddenly wanted to cry again. But his eyes held me steady and I kept the tears away. "Wear it in honor of me."

The vow was a variation of the lines my parents had spoken when they wed; I'd added the honor part because it was true, and to make it a little more palatable to the general Mandoa population, who tend to look at wedding rings as frivolous. Not that Canderous had cared what they thought, really, when I suggested it, but I didn't want to shock them any more than I had to.

"I will wear it with honor." Canderous said, his eyes never leaving mine. He took my left hand, and slid a ring on to it. "I give you this ring as a symbol of my eternal devotion and love. Wear it in honor of me."

"I will wear it with honor." I glanced down and only managed not to gasp by biting the inside of my lip. It was a Mobeus strip of platinum, carved all around with a floral vine. I couldn't make out exactly what the flowers were, and wasn't willing to break the seriousness of the ceremony to peer closer. But it was simple, and beautiful, and utterly perfect. It also fit exactly right. I smiled up at my Mate and sniffled discretely again.

"Before the final vows are spoken, is there any reason these two people should not be bound in honorable matrimony? Speak now, or forever hold your peace."

No one spoke. Elder Evana smiled, and continued.

"As the Mandalore and the Lady of our people, will you vow to defend our honor, lead our battles, and uphold our laws?"

"We do so vow," we said together.

"Let the chief witness come forth."

Jarxel stepped up again and bowed.

"The vows have been spoken," Elder Evana said. "Let the final binding be made."

Jarxel took Canderous' left wrist firmly and drew a dagger across his palm, quick and deep enough for blood to well freely. Then he took mine, repeating the motion. We let a few drops fall to the ground as a symbol of our willingness to bleed for our people, then clasped hands together. Elder Evana bound them with a silver cord, representing the steel of a blade.

"As you mingle your blood, you become one flesh, one mind, one soul, one heart. What has been bound together, let no one tear apart. For as long as you breathe, you are bound to each other. As Mates, you are bound for eternity. As Mandalore and Lady of the Mandoa, you are bound to the clans. Let it be known to these witnesses that Clan Ordo clan lives on, in Canderous and Jennet, and their child, and in the hearts of their people. As you bind your lives to each other, the Mandoa bind theirs to you. We will rise again, one Clan, one people. May you live together in victory and prosperity, and lead the Clan with honor."

Canderous snapped straight, his eyes going wide. I stared at him, confused and not remembering those last few lines exactly that way.

_What just happened?_ I asked, feeling a vibration I didn't understand going through him. Then it touched me, and it felt like a lightning bolt taking up residence in my brain. My head jerked up in reflex. _What's going on?_

_The Clans have disbanded, _he said in wonder. _And reformed, under me. Under _us._ Clan Ordo._

I could see the Republic soldiers becoming aware of something extraordinary happening. Unable to feel what it was, they were looking around uneasily. The Jedi in our wedding party exchanged looks, definitely knowing something was up, feeling the energy but not understanding its significance. It grew stronger, and I barely contained a gasp.

_And they do this by electrocuting us? _I asked, mentally gritting my teeth.

_It's the energy of the Clans binding themselves to us, like battle ecstasy. It only happens…._he trailed off, overwhelmed by a confused mix of shock, disbelief and wonder.

_What? _I asked sharply.

Canderous' voice in my head was almost a whisper. _It only happens when a Mandalore and his true Mate are joined in marriage, and the Mandoa declare themselves one Clan._ _Our legends say it's only happened twice before: the first Mandalore and his Mate, when they founded the first Clan, and about two millennia ago, after the Clans were nearly decimated, and a Mandalore rose with his Mate to rebuild. _His voice became uncertain._ But…they're legends, stories we tell for morale around the bonfires. No one in this day and age truly believes it happened._

The energy level intensified, shooting bolts through us like small shocks from a malfunctioning control panel. I suddenly understood each one was a Mandalorian pledging themselves to the Clan, the Mandalore, and his Mate.

_I think they believe it now, _I said, my eyes wide.

I was trying to assimilate all this when Elder Evana's voice rose above the now rumbling crowd.

"Behold the Helm! Clan Ordo lives!" Elder Evana called, and the crowd roared back.

At this, we looked at the Helm on its stand, and it was glowing with a pure radiance. Tendrils of light were shooting out from all sides, reaching out and touching all the Mandoa. The brightest beam was focused on Canderous and me, surrounding us in a nimbus of white light. I saw a broad beam thrusting toward the sky like a sword. The Mandalorians sighed in a sort of ecstasy. The two of us could only stare, enraptured by the sight.

"Clan Ordo lives!" the battle cry ripped from a hundred throats jerked our attention from the Helm.

The honor guard came forward, going to one knee, and the rest of the Mandoa marched up the aisle to array themselves behind. The front four rows scrambled to snatch their chairs out of the way and hastily decamped as the Mandalorians crowded in and knelt. I saw Stefan, a look of deep interest and surprise on his handsome face, fold his chair quickly and stand where he could see the proceedings best.

"I present to this company, the Mandalore, Canderous Calder Ordo, and his true Mate, Jennet Adriadne Jax Ordo, Lady of the Mandoa. May they live long, and lead Clan Ordo with honor."

"Hail Mandalore and the Lady of the Mandoa!" bellowed the warriors.

"We take our vow now. We are yours, Mandalore, Lady, with the last breath of our bodies. We will fight with you, and for you, protect you and follow you, and honor you as the leaders of our Clan, and the soul of the Mandoa. So it is, so it shall be."

"So it is, so it shall be," roared the crowd.

The energy rose, the lightning becoming a deep soul-shaking hum, the hum transforming into a song of pure wild joy. It was coming from the Helm, touching the Mandoa, all of them. It raced through us, and like the battle ecstasy, circled through Canderous, me, out to all the Mandalorians, and back into the Helm which was glowing so bright it looked as if engulfed by flames. Through it all, Canderous and I stood together, hands still bound, facing each other but completely aware of the Mandoa. His eyes were bright, electric blue, blazing with the power coursing through them, and I could almost see myself through his eyes, my brown ones snapping with an amber light.

With a rush, the power circulated faster and faster and suddenly beyond that, I could feel that there were hundreds, no, thousands, all around the galaxy, that were feeling the tremor, knowing that they had a home, a purpose, a Clan. And we would find them, or they us. It was a brief instant, just a flicker of awareness for most of them. But they were ours now. There was that split second of connection, and it was gone, abruptly sucked back into the Helm. I almost fell with the suddenness of its release, but Canderous held me firmly upright.

"Oh. My. Gods," I breathed.

"I wouldn't go that far, Wildcat," Canderous said, but his eyes were as wide and startled as mine.

We stood there, and turned as one to face the Mandoa, who were all still kneeling. The rest of the guests were utterly still. We turned back to the Elders, who were also kneeling. With a touch of hysteria, I wondered if we'd all still be frozen in time here, when the rest of the Clan comes home. Then I felt Canderous shake himself mentally, and speak.

"As you were," he boomed, and the spell was broken. The Mandoa rose to their feet, saluted or bowed, and returned to their places. I saw Lorna being helped to stand by Ladria. I was still buzzed from the connection and everything seemed slightly surreal, and I could tell Canderous felt the same. But he smiled at me, and I felt steadier. Then Elder Evana spoke again.

"Mandalore, you may kiss your bride," she said breathlessly.

"It's about damn time," Canderous said, and captured my mouth with his own. I heard the roar of three hundred cheers, and then nothing else existed but my husband.


	74. Chapter 74

**Canderous**

I was reeling from the impact of the ceremony, but managed to keep both of us steady as I kissed Jennet for the first time as my wife. For that moment, everything else fell away, and the universe shrank to the two of us. I could have kissed her until the stars burned out.

We came back far too soon, and I heard the cheers of our friends, my people, and the Republic soldiers. Jennet was staring up at me, a little dazed, but her face was glowing as if lit by a hundred candles.

"Now it's official, Jennet Ordo," I said. "Have I told you I love you today?"

"Say that again," she said breathlessly.

"I love you," I said promptly, smiling.

"I love you too," she smiled back. "But I meant my name."

"Jennet Ordo." I said in my deepest rumble.

"I love the sound of my name in your mouth," she said, and yanked me down for another kiss, to the delight of the witnesses.

Eventually, we made it back down the aisle, under swords held aloft by the honor guard. I heard Elder Evana invite the guests to help themselves to food and drink, and that Jennet and I would be available for the reception shortly. I wished devoutly that we didn't have a reception; what I most wanted to do is take Jennet back to our bed. On the other hand, I had a few questions I wanted answered, and I knew that we both were needed out there.

I escorted Jennet to the Phoenix, and stripped off my armor without bothering to go back to the Ebon Hawk. I left it in a pile next to the hatch, and told Kex to put it away in my cabin once the ladies left. I reattached the cape to my shoulders, knowing Jennet would be wearing hers with whatever she was changing into. Then I snagged a chair and sat a ways back from the hatch, waiting for Jennet to emerge. I didn't want to head back alone, and what questions I had she should be hearing the answers to as well.

I still had the Helm tucked under my arm. I studied it as best I could in the darkness, a little wary about what it might do next. The Clans reforming under my name was utterly unexpected. I had thought about doing just that at one point, but discarded the idea once I found some of my kin. They were bitter, many nearly broken, and while they needed leadership, they clung to what they could that was familiar. Battle. Courage. Honor. Clan. To try and make them forget their families and unite under a new Clan would have been too much, I saw. They needed time, and I was willing to give it to them. It seemed that the time had come. I understood _what_ had happened, and even to a large extent _why_. What I didn't know was how the Elders had known enough to change the ceremony, or why it had happened to me.

Jarxel wandered up while I was pondering, chair in hand. He unfolded it and sat next to me, straddling it backwards.

"Hell of a thing," he said, and I saw that some of the light that had struck all of us was still shining in his eyes. "I always knew you had it in you."

I looked at him a minute, and something clicked. "It was you, wasn't it?"

"What?" he said, looking genuinely puzzled.

"I thought I could reunite the Clans, yes. But you were the only one I told that I considered uniting them as _one_ Clan. Mine. You told the Elders that, didn't you?" I looked at my old friend, not angry, how could I be? I just wanted to know.

"Yeah," he said, not looking at me. "I did. I thought something like this might happen."

"How by Kobald's balls could you ever expect something like that to happen?" I growled. "No one could. It was legend, stories we learned as children. No one ever believed it could happen _now_."

"I know enough about legend and history to understand that most myths are based on a seed of fact. I also know enough about our prophecies to see that the signs were there for a new Rising. I just told the Elders what I thought, that was all," Jarxel shrugged.

I stared at him for a full minute, and he looked blandly back. "It's more than that," I said slowly. "You knew, somehow, that this would happen. And that could only be if…"

I stopped, and suddenly so many things over the years made sense, things I had put down to soldier's instinct or coincidence. Tiny pieces were fitting themselves together to reveal an entirely different picture than I thought I had been looking at. The fact Jarxel never wanted his own command, was always content to be my XO, even though he had years and experience on me and was a fine leader in his own right. How he would warn me of hunches he had, and get us out of tight spots, anticipating trouble that no one could have foreseen. And how unsurprised he had been when I'd tracked him down, and asked him to join me in the hunt for our kin. As if he'd been waiting for me to do just that.

"You're a Seer," I said, looking him in the eye.

"No," he said calmly. "I'm a warrior. I just get flashes, sometimes. And occasionally very detailed, specific flashes," he smiled wryly.

"Seers are revered," I said. "You would have been an Elder. Why didn't you?"

"Because I am a warrior first," Jarxel said simply. "My mother knew, and helped me hide it. She had a touch of it herself. Not enough to be a true Seer, but sufficient to know that my place wasn't with the Elders. So I trained as any fighter does, and eventually I found where I needed to be. With you."

"My Gods," I said, awed by this admission. "You've been more of a friend than I even knew. You helped me, the entire way."

"Don't give me too much credit," he growled. "You got here yourself. I did little more than keep you from getting too reckless and getting your fool ass killed. I knew you were needed, that's all. I didn't know why, and it didn't matter. You were my friend, and my commander. Eventually, my Mandalore. And now, the head of my Clan, as well. But my friend and brother first, and always."

"If you saw this coming, why did you protest about allying with the Republic, or were so suspicious about Jennet?" I asked curiously.

"You might recall neither of those protests lasted long. I _am_ a Mandalorian, after all, plus the flashes I get usually aren't complete. Both Jennet and your idea about aiding the Republic were completely unexpected. I had a feeling you were going to find your Mate when you left with Ladria. I was a bit thrown when she turned out to be Ondorian. Not to mention Jedi." Jarxel shrugged, giving me a wide grin.

"And Telosian," I reminded him, grinning back.

"Yeah. But I soon saw that Jennet _was_ your Mate, and along with aiding the Republic, the fact the Mate of the Mandalore was Jedi trained, if not sworn, made me realize that the Mandoa were being prepared for a new age." Jarxel spoke softly, looking rather dreamily into the distance. "When she won over the camp so quickly, to my mind, it was confirmed. So I spoke to the Elders, and they studied the prophecies and sacred writings, and felt that I could be right. Changing the wedding ceremony would not have hurt anything if we were wrong; it simply would have united the Clans under Clan Ordo, which needed to be done anyway, and the Elders agreed.

"But," he continued fiercely, "all I did was put some of the pieces together, and give you a hand when you needed it. Neither the Elders nor I made you what you are; you did that all on your own. You rose to General during the wars; one of the youngest to do so in our history. You were in the running for Mandalore even then. You chose to join Revan on her mission, and became a Hero of the Republic, began to seek out the surviving Mandoa, and six months ago joined Ladria. You found Jennet, recognized her as your Mate, and brought her here. And the Helm was given to you. No one else."

"Did you have anything to do with Revan finding the Helm and giving it to me?" I asked, more to eliminate that possibility than anything else. I couldn't see how he could have.

He was silent long enough that I turned to him in surprise. "You didn't, did you?"

"I don't know for sure," he said slowly. "But I did have it on the eve of Malachor V."

"You what?!" I almost fell out of my chair. "How the fuck did that happen? The Mandalore wasn't even on our ship."

"But I was on his, remember? Just for a couple of hours. You sent me over there to report, and I saw him personally. I knew we were going to lose. I don't know what tipped him to me; maybe it was on my face, or just that he was the Mandalore and sensed my unease. But he understood I could See, somehow, and asked, and Gods help me, I told him. It was Karnik Laskar who was Mandalore," he said, his voice far away.

I nodded. "So what did he do?" I prompted.

"He handed me the Helm," Jarxel said simply. "Told me to keep it safe, and not let the Republic use it to break what was left of the Clans when it was all over. I tried to give it back, told him that for the Mandalore to go into battle without it would demoralize the troops; if he did, he might as well surrender now."

I agreed with that, and nodded. "Good advice. What did he say?"

Jarxel looked at me suddenly, his dark eyes fathomless. "He just said 'leave that to me. Now, go, and keep this trust.' They executed him the next morning, on the ruins of Malachor V. I remember we were surprised about that; Jedi didn't usually execute prisoners of war."

"Revan did," I said. "Not often, but she knew that the only way to stop us was to be as ruthless as we were. So she set an example. She ordered our war machines destroyed, our weapons and armor burned and our Mandalore executed before our eyes. Then she left us to find our way back however we could."

"It was fortunate you sent a few scout ships into deep space when you realized it was hopeless," Jarxel commented.

"On your advice," I reminded him. "I was mostly surprised she didn't execute me too as one of the last surviving generals. At the time, I didn't care if she did or not; all I could think about was getting the rest of the men off the graveyard that our home world had become." I paused. "So what _did_ you do with the Helm?"

"During the final assault, just after General Windbreak set off the Shadow Generators, I put it in an escape pod, and sent it to the planet, hoping it would go unnoticed during the chaos." Jarxel said simply.

"You did _what_?" I asked incredulously.

"Yeah," Jarxel said wryly. "I thought it was crazy too. But it was the only thing I could think of."

"She must have found it," I mused almost under my breath. "Later, after she left us there. And kept it all that time, even when she had gone over to the dark side. I wonder why."

"Maybe," Jarxel shrugged. "Does it matter?"

"No," I said. "Not now."

We were silent a while, and after a time I voiced another point that had been bothering me.

"Why didn't you tell me about being a Seer?" I asked quietly. "I've known you all my life; you know me better than anyone. Next to Jennet, I trust you above all. I thought you trusted me. So why?"

He looked at me a moment. "The first time I saw you, you were five years old. Do you remember?"

"Not really," I said, mystified by this change of subject. "I don't really remember you _not_ being around."

"I served under your father's command with my uncle from the time I was thirteen. Mine was a small Clan, not terribly important, but well respected for turning out excellent warriors. Our families were allies; the Ordo and Tauran clans had been for decades, close to a century. I fought my first real battle at thirteen and got my tattoo, same as you did fifteen years later."

I nodded, seeing in my mind's eye the Tauran clan badge, a powerful wickedly horned bull dragon, head down and charging, snorting fire. I suddenly remembered that as a small child I had thought it much more exciting than my own clan symbol. Of course, I never said so aloud, liking my hide intact rather in the strips of flesh it would have been in if my father ever heard me express that. But Jarxel had known without me telling him that I admired his tattoo greatly, and allowed me to see it whenever I demanded to. By the time I earned my own, I had forgotten my fascination with the bull dragon image and was proud to sport the Ordo phoenix.

"I fought with my uncle and his sons until I came of age," he continued, and I recalled that Jarxel's father had been killed on campaign when he was very young. He and his mother had lived with his father's brother's household, and he had been trained along side his six cousins. "There wasn't much future there for me, so he arranged for me to marry Kara, your mother's cousin, and be taken in to your father's household. Common enough, and I was eager to go. The day I arrived, you were out on the training field, wielding your first sword, and doing a right fine job of it for being so young. I stopped to watch, and when the lesson was over, you demanded to know who I was. Less than half my height and a quarter my mass, and you still managed to look like you were in charge. Arrogant beyond belief, and you were pissed as hell when I laughed about it; thought I was mocking you. You charged me, and I knocked you flat and held my boot on your chest until you cooled off. Impressed the hell out of your father that I didn't hesitate to take the heir to the house of Ordo down a peg."

"I remember that day now," I laughed. "It's a wonder I lived to see six; Father and I were always knocking heads."

"Yeah," Jarxel said comfortably. "He was proud of you for it, though. So here I was, brand new man at arms in Clan Ordo, holding down a bellowing five year old, and your father sees the situation and starts laughing so hard I though he was going to burst a blood vessel. 'Kid,' he says, 'anyone that can knock some sense into my son is welcome. Look after him, and you'll always have a place here.'" He mimicked my father's voice and manner so well I laughed harder.

"I watched your back from then on," he continued, chuckling. "Took over your training when we weren't on campaign. Whenever we were home, I was your watchdog, and by the time you were old enough to fight, your father had raised me in rank to third in command. When he gave you your own command, I went with you, and I've been your second ever since."

"Except the ten years after the war," I said, a touch bitterly. "I shouldn't have let you go then."

"You needed to," he shrugged fatalistically. "There were things you were meant to do without me. I knew you'd be back."

"None of this explains why you never told me," I pointed out.

"You were smart as hell, and I was always wondering when you'd figure it out. I was pretty certain if you did, I'd be forced into the Elders, and separated from you. I'd known that day I held you down that I'd found where I needed to be. I wasn't going to risk it. And later, I really did think about telling you. Kara knew, and urged me to speak up. But you were still so young, and soon I had sons of my own; there never seemed a good time to tell you. And then the war started. I couldn't say anything then, because I knew from the start we'd lose. I wasn't there for the same reasons you were," he said gruffly. "You were there seeking victory, as you needed to be. I was there for damage control. If I'd told you then, you would have asked what I saw, and I couldn't lie to you."

"I could say you lied by omission," I said with a touch of a growl.

"You could," he agreed. "And you'd be right. We wouldn't have won, even if I had told you. I'd dealt with the Sight on and off for forty years when we started that campaign, and if I'd learned anything, it was that those without it rarely benefit from being told directly what their destinies are. It would destroy everything if you knew. So I kept my mouth shut."

We sat there in the dark, together as we had been most of our lives, brothers and companions, and I realized he was right. Knowing changes things. Would I have married Gerda, knowing that I'd meet Jennet one day? Would I have done things differently during the war, certain we were going to lose? How much would be different if I had known Jarxel had the Sight? I would have believed him, but would anyone else have listened? Probably not, I admitted. And in supporting him, I likely would have been stripped of command, and not have been in a position of authority when the war ended, which held weight with many of the survivors when I took the Helm.

"Destiny is a damned tricky thing," I said finally. "You were right not to tell me. And I did what I had to."

"Aye, destiny _is_ tricky," Jarxel agreed. "But it has its moments." He nudged me and I looked up.

Jennet was coming out of the Phoenix, and I stood to wait for her, as did Jarxel. She looked breathtaking in a blue dress that flowed over her body like water made into silk. The silver of the cape she wore caught the light behind her. I smiled at that glimpse of my wife, unaware of me watching for the moment. Then she turned to me and her face lit like a candle, the light from the interior of the ship outlining her small form like a halo. It reminded me of the Helm, glowing with an unearthly radiance.

"Jarxel," I said suddenly, "what exactly _is_ the Helm, do you know?"

He looked at me through the dark, his face mostly in shadow, the torches from the party giving just enough illumination to make out his features.

"It's protection," he said, smiling. "Keeps your head from getting smashed in. Mind you use it, now."

He clapped me on the arm, and strode off to the party.


	75. Chapter 75

**Jennet**

Mira, Visas, and Ladria joined me shortly after Canderous escorted me to the Phoenix to change. What I had intended as a quick change ended up the better part of an hour of female primping and speculative chatting about the ceremony.

"The Helm…was it really glowing?" Mira asked as she wiggled out of her tight pants and reached for her outfit that was hanging from a hook on the back of the door. I hadn't seen what she was wearing for the reception before; in the quick glance I gave it as I stripped off armor, tunic, boots and pants it looked both expensive and slinky.

"Yeah," I said, still bemused by it. "It was."

"Why?" she asked, engulfed by amber material swirling around her.

"Best I could tell, it was connecting the Mandoa to us," I said, slipping my own dress over my head. It was cut rather lower than I usually wear in the front, and I eyed my meager bosom compared to Mira's bounty and sighed. But the ice blue fabric draped pleasingly from my shoulders, dipping low enough so my locket wasn't competing with the neckline. It was sleeveless, so the Ordo tattoo on my upper right arm was displayed to its best advantage. It was still a little bit of a shock to catch a glimpse of it in the mirror while I was dressing.

"All of them, yes?" Visas asked, her tone not really a question. "Everywhere?"

"Yes," I said, looking at her. She was already out of her battle robes and into a dress the same dark red, demure in cut but clingy enough in material that her figure was set off marvelously. She'd even traded her head-shrouding hood for a decorative veil across her eyes of opaque material attached with delicate golden chains cleverly tucked into her hair. With a shock I realized it was the first time I'd seen Visa's hair. It was a lovely, rich deep brown, nearly black, pulled up into a knot on the top of her head with abundant curls spilling down that could only be natural; I knew the signs. It must be long too; the curls reached past her shoulders. "You look beautiful, Visas."

"Thank you," she said, looking pleased, her faintly olive skin flushed with pleasure. "How many do you think there are?" she asked curiously.

"Thousands," I said, shrugging. "Well over the fifteen thousand Canderous told me he estimated were alive. He said he knew personally of around five thousand, it's closer to six now, but what we felt….I would only be shooting in the dark to guess. But they'll come."

"That was one of the most amazing things I've ever witnessed," Ladria said quietly, smoothing the emerald green material of her dress in place.

It was cut similarly to mine, simple and comfortable, the skirt deceptively straight until you moved. The color made her green eyes stand out and her dark red hair burn with a bright flame. She wasn't much taller than me, and was similarly built; small boned, slim hipped, smallish bosom. She had opted for gold sandals with almost no heel, and I had liked them so much I bought a pair myself in silver. She shook out my cape that I had carelessly tossed on the bed, and began to attach it to the shoulders of my dress.

"Yeah," Mira said, with a final wiggle to settle the folds of silk into place.

I gaped at her. Ladria and Visas looked regal and beautiful as always, even if it was a little bit of a shock to see them in party clothes. But Mira was stunning. Her short copper hair was pulled back from her face, rather than carelessly flopping over her forehead and into her eyes as usual. The thick locks had been coaxed into loose curls that caught the light in shades of amber, gold, russet, copper, brass, and deep auburn. She was wearing an amber silk two piece gown, the top a sleeveless, one shoulder number that clung just below the bust line. The skirt started below the navel, sarong-style, and sandals exactly the same shade peeped out. A closer inspection showed that it wasn't two pieces; a nearly invisible sheer netlike material blended almost perfectly with her skin, shimmering when the light caught it right. I stared a second, and grinned.

"You still can't see the tattoo," I commented. "Turn around."

Mira obliged, giving us a dramatic model's turn and I eyed her critically. The skirt stayed decent as she twirled, thank the Gods, even if it did show quite a bit of leg. Dax was going to have his hands full tonight. It was a dress that inspires riots.

"Nope," I concluded. "Still can't see it. But you look gorgeous, Mira. Dax will go crazy."

"Thanks," she said, smiling.

She pulled the split side of her skirt aside, hiking up the fabric to show a credit-sized tattoo in reds, blues, and golds high on her right hip. I peered closer, trying to make out its shape. After a moment, it made sense.

"It's Mandoa for good fortune," I said, surprised. "The lettering is much more fancy than any self respecting Mandalorian would use, though."

"Yeah, well, it's the hide in plain sight tactic," Mira said, shrugging. "I designed it so it simply looked decorative. But it's worked; I've had good luck ever since, mostly."

"Really?" I said skeptically, thinking of the Wookie that had hunted her, among other things.

"I'm here now," she said, eyes suspiciously bright. "I have friends, I'm Jedi, and I have a man that adores me, smart mouth, temper, kick ass fighter and all."

"What's a resurrected Wookie compared to that?" I laughed, and hugged her.

"Damn straight," Mira agreed.

"You go on," Ladria said to me, making shooing motions. "We'll tidy up and get our things back to the Hawk."

"If you're sure," I said politely, but was heading to the hatch almost as the words were out of her mouth.

"Don't keep the groom waiting!" Mira called. "We'll catch up."

I waved over my shoulder and hurried to the ramp. I stepped down the walkway and peered into the gloom, blinking. Two dark shapes were standing about halfway from the Phoenix to the torchlight of the party that quickly resolved themselves into Canderous and Jarxel as my eyes adjusted. I saw Jarxel clap my husband on the arm and walk off and Canderous start walking toward me. I met him halfway and he swung me off the ground, kissing me thoroughly.

"You look beautiful, cyar'ika," he said when we came up for air.

"You clean up nice yourself," I said, eyes shining. "What was that about?" I asked, nodding after the retreating XO.

"A lot of things," he said, looking bemused. He tucked my arm through his and we started toward the party as he explained. I have to say that mental communication saves a ton of time filling in blanks.

"So Jarxel's a Seer?" I said, as bemused as Canderous. "Interesting. Explains a lot."

"Exactly what I thought. Sort of makes me wonder how in control of things I have been all along," he rumbled ruefully.

"He didn't direct you, just watched your back," I pointed out. "As he said, it wasn't as if he knew the whole of it until now."

"Yeah, I know you're right. Just a hell of a lot to assimilate today."

"You think?" I said with a chuckle. "Sith warship, Bastila's betrayal, a funeral, a wedding, the rise Clan Ordo. And a baby on the way," I added softly.

"Yes," was all he said, but his face lit and his arm moved from his side to my stomach. "She'll be a beautiful and deadly as her mother."

"Thanks," I said, trying desperately not to giggle and failing. "That's high praise."

The next hour was spent receiving our guests, and then we were free to circulate. Everyone was enjoying the double celebration of victory over the Sith and the wedding and the ale was flowing freely. Within two hours, almost no one was completely sober. Republic and Mandalorian alike were cheerfully mingling and the conversations were loud and enthusiastic. I caught snippets of everything from battle tactics to fashion, depending on the participants. A good many of the female soldiers were openly admiring the Mandalorian males in their dress uniforms, and being ogled in return.

The honor guard had been dismissed to enjoy the celebration as they saw fit, so it was a bit of a concern at first when Jarxel and all six approached Canderous and me as a group. We had taken a minute to stand together near the alter and watch the crowd, laughing together at some of the antics we were witnessing.

"Mandalore," Jarxel said formally, and bowed to us. "Lady. As your executive officer, I would request permission to be the first to receive my tattoo."

"Your -," Canderous stopped, and swallowed. "Granted," he said, his voice gruff, "on one condition. You may not ink it over your original."

"It shouldn't be below any other badge," Jarxel pointed out. "And there's no room to put it above. I suppose it could be on my left arm," he said doubtfully.

"Put it here," Canderous said suddenly, placing his hand over Jarxel's heart. "Where the Clan lives."

Jarxel smiled, a bright genuine expression that transformed his face from craggy gruffness to almost handsome. "Aye," he said, so softly that only Canderous and I heard it. "Clan Ordo has always been there for me."

"New age, new traditions," he said louder, and the honor guard nodded. "As the Mandalore says, so shall it be."

A brief discussion decided the order of who would receive the tattoo. As my Champion, Dax would be second, followed by Kelborn, Kex, Xarga, Zuka, and Tagren. Jarxel promised to make up a roster of everyone by rank to follow.

"I want this strictly voluntary," Canderous insisted. "No one will be forced."

"That isn't going to be an issue," Jarxel said positively, grinning. "It's been the most common question all night."

"What's the second?" I asked curiously.

"What the baby's name is," he answered promptly. "Tied with how long will it be before you two leave the party. There's bets going around; pool's up to five thousand credits."

Canderous whistled. "That's a tidy sum."

Jarxel and the others bowed and melted back into the thick of the party. I saw Dax head straight to Mira, who he had hardly let out of his sight since she had made her appearance. She was surrounded by a group of admirers, split about even between Mandalorian and Republic soldiers, but her eyes tracked Dax as he approached. He strode up, handsome and authoritive, kissed her senseless and swept her off to parts unknown, the rejected hopefuls staring after, clearly disappointed.

I was about to suggest we go celebrate privately when Mission, Carth, and Jolee approached, the Twi'lik clutching a fabric-wrapped bundle.

"It's a wedding gift," she announced, handing it to me. "We all contributed, both crews of the Ebon Hawk. And Stefan, when I showed it to him. I put it together."

As I started to unwrap the bulky package, I saw all our friends drifting our way, Mira towing Dax along, Visas escorted by Jarxel. They grouped around, grinning as the cloth fell away. It was a holo album, thick and heavy, and on the first page, everyone had written a short message along side an image of themselves. There were even holos of T-3, and HK-47. Go-to was noticeably missing and I mentioned this.

"He disappeared after we escaped Malachor V," Ladria said, shrugging. "I think T-3 saw him go, but won't say when or how."

"Good riddance," Atton said with a touch of a growl.

Someone snagged me and Canderous chairs, and I spread the unwieldy album between us, flipping through the pages. I was delighted at the effort Mission had made. She had not only tracked down the images, but artistically arranged them so each double page told a sort of story, with little embellishments added here and there. There were pictures of the entire Star Forge mission crew and I saw Revan for the first time, smiling at Carth and a much younger looking Mission in the common area of the Ebon Hawk. I don't know what I had expected her to look like, but I was struck by how ordinary she seemed. All three were standing, and she appeared to be only a few centimeters taller than Ladria, just about reaching Carth's chin, with long brown-blond hair braided down her back. She was fair skinned, and very pretty in a wholesome sort of way. I activated the holo, and watched her animatedly talk to her friends, then walk out of the frame. She moved like a warrior, that was certain.

There were several pages along the same lines and on the last set of these I started to laugh so hard I almost fell out of my chair. Jarxel peered over my shoulder and joined in. Canderous was making a half-hearted attempt to snatch the album away and close it but I held it firm. The last image on the page was of Canderous, sitting on a folding chair in the garage. He was obviously fast asleep with his chin resting on his chest and his arms folded across his middle, hands clasped together, long legs stretched in front of him, ankles crossed. I'd seen him sleep like this a hundred times, simply catching rest when the moment presented itself. What had made me laugh was the gizka curled at his feet, nose on stubby tail, and another one resting its chin on his boots, also clearly snoozing. A third was under his chair, looking quizzically out of the picture.

"Well, Mandalore," Jarxel said through the gusts of merriment, "your reputation's shot."

"Mission, I think I'm going to kill you. Slowly," Canderous growled, glaring at her.

"Give it your best shot, C-man," Mission said, with an impish grin.

"I love it," I announced. "I think I'll have this one blown up and displayed in the receiving hall. Right behind the Mandalore's chair."

"Now that's just evil, Wildcat," Canderous protested, but I saw the gleam of humor in his eyes. "How can I dispense justice with this over my head?"

"Okay," I allowed. "Not in the receiving hall. I'll keep it in my office."

"Your _private_ office," he glowered. "And not enlarged."

"Oh all right, ti kar'ta," I said with a mock grumble.

We looked through the rest of the book, everyone grouped around and getting in each other's way as they competed to catch the first glimpse of the next page. There were holos that had been taken well before I had joined the group on the Ebon Hawk; Visas meditating, Disciple in the med lab, Ladria and Atton in the cockpit, Mira cleaning her rocket launcher in the common room, Bao Dur tinkering with the engines, Probe hovering nearby. There was one of Kriea, seated cross-legged in the dorm, obviously deep in meditation and unaware of being observed. I was surprised at this, and looked up at Mission.

"Ladria insisted that be included," she said, shrugging.

"Memories are important," Ladria said softly. "Hiding them never is a good idea."

I nodded, and moved on to the next page. There was an image of Canderous as a young man, probably right after a battle, standing between a much younger Jarxel and another man who must be Calder. The resemblance to his brother was startling.

"Where the fuck did you find this?" Canderous exclaimed, but obviously answering his own question, twisted to stare up at Jarxel.

"It's the only holo of you and Calder that survived," he said gruffly. "I had it on me, with this one," he pointed to the one on the next page.

It was a family group, Jarxel with a striking dark-haired woman, surrounded by five boys of varying ages. Canderous was on the end, hand on the shoulder of the oldest boy. No one was smiling, but they looked happy, somehow.

"I remember it was Mother who took this," Canderous mused. "Just before they left to speak to the Mandalore. You insisted I be in the picture."

"I wanted one of my family," Jarxel said simply. "To take with me. I kept the one of us with Calder for you."

Tactfully, sensing both were dangerously close to sentimental breakthroughs, I tuned another page. The next few were of my family, less of a shock as I still had my own album I'd retrieved from the lockbox tucked into my nightstand drawer. But many were images I hadn't seen before, my parents as children, with a fair-haired boy that could only be Stefan almost always in the picture. Their wedding day, Stefan proudly standing next to my father, my mother shining with happiness. Me as a baby, being held by Dad over his head and laughing up at me. One with Dad and I sparring, my blades crossed with his, faces tense with concentration. I was about ten, I thought. Mom and I in a field, her arm around me and smiling, my hair loose down my back and getting in my eyes. A teenage Stefan, leggy and coltish, awkwardly posed by an unfamiliar Jedi and an equally young Drake Jax. I sniffled discretely at the memories and moved along.

The last few pages were mostly of Canderous and me with various friends, taken on the sly, mostly by Atton I assumed. Dax looming over me, serious expression on his face, in front of the mess hall. Bao Dur and Canderous in the garage, bent over the workbench and pieces of armor scattered around. The two of us at an unguarded moment, outside the Ebon Hawk, his arm around me, smiling down into my upturned face. And to my shock, the kiss he'd taken in forfeit after our fight. I looked up accusingly.

"I couldn't resist," Atton shrugged. "Figured it would make good blackmail material."

"You are a sneaky bastard," I said without heat. Canderous, amazingly, didn't say a word, just touched it briefly with one finger and nodded at Atton.

"Thank you, everyone," I said, tears threatening to spill. Disciple and Stefan both flourished handkerchiefs and I grabbed one at random. "It's the best gift imaginable."

Canderous stood, closed the album and tucked it under his arm. He took my hand and helped me to my feet.

"Thanks for everything," he rumbled. "Now I'm going to take my wife back to our ship."

"Good," Atton said gleefully. "That means I won the betting pool."

"Don't spend it all in one place," Canderous advised.

And we walked into our future, hand in hand.


	76. Epilogue

_**Epilogue**_

**Canderous**

Two days after the wedding, Carth gathered up his troops and headed out on the Republic transport to return to his own warship, the Eternity. Mission, Dustil, Jolee, and Stefan joined him. Things seemed quiet with the Republic soldiers gone, but I knew that wasn't going to last long. The first wave of Mandoa refugees were due in four months. Construction of the house had started, keeping Bao Dur and me occupied with supervising.

Ladria left three days later. She apparently slipped Atton drugs, ordered the assassin droid to carry him off ship, then took off in the Ebon Hawk in the dead of night with only HK-47 and T-3 for company. Atton was livid when he woke up. Used to his easygoing manner, Atton in a rage rivaled any Mandalorian in camp, and the rest of us could only stare in shock or admiration, depending on the point of view. I myself was impressed with the vocabulary and creativeness of his curses, combined with a truly magnificent potential for destruction.

"Atton," Bao Dur said after the initial wave had abated, "she left this." He held up a holovid disc and Atton made a grab for it. The Iridonian easily snatched it out of reach and I thought Atton might attack right there. Jennet tensed beside me, ready to leap on him if he made a move.

Then like the sudden quiet after a tidal wave, Atton slumped, all the fight draining out of him. He sat abruptly, not even checking if there was a chair behind him. Luckily, there was, and he slouched in it, head down.

"She shouldn't have left without me," he said, and the pain in his eyes when he looked up at us almost made _me_ flinch.

Jennet relaxed, and I felt her sympathy for the man wash over her. She stepped forward and wordlessly crouched in front of his chair, putting her arms around him like a mother comforting her child. He clung to her for a minute, hiding his face in her shoulder. When she stepped away, his eyes were dry but blazing.

"I'm going after her," he announced. "You all can come if you want, but I'm out of here."

"How are you going to do that, son?" I growled. "No ship, and I'll be damned if I let you take the Phoenix."

"Just get me to Onderon," he snarled back. "I've got credits; I'll buy a ship."

"And track her how?" Jennet asked gently. "You know better than anyone that if you don't want to be found, that's easy enough to do."

"Let's see what she has to say before we run off half-cocked," Mira said reasonably.

Bao Dur nodded, and plugged the holodisc into the computer. Ladria appeared on the screen, standing in the common area of the Ebon Hawk. The date stamp in the corner indicated she'd made this the night of the wedding, after the ceremony. Gods know how she found the time or privacy to manage it, but then Ladria was one of the most resourceful women I knew.

"By now, I've left," she said simply, gazing out at us. I figured T-3 had made the recording. "I'm sorry to do it so abruptly, or to have tricked you, Atton. But you can't follow, and it was the only way. None of you can. I don't have the ability to See the way Visas can, or even Kriea did. But she was right; where I'm going, I cannot take anyone I love along."

There were a series of irritated beeps, and a small, sad smile touched her lips. "Besides you, T-3," she agreed.

"You all have work to do," she continued. "The Republic needs you now. I expect Jolee and Stefan will soon meet on Coruscant, to begin rebuilding the Jedi council. All of you, my Padawan, will be needed desperately, especially in light of Bastila's betrayal. I place this trust with you. I won't ask you to make me proud; you all already have."

"Mira, remember your lessons, and listen. Visas, your Sight and wisdom will be a guiding force with the new Order. Disciple, your knowledge and tireless restoration of the archives will be key in pinpointing past mistakes and keeping the Order from repeating them. Bao Dur, your strength and faith will get us through. Along with your incredible ability to build anything out of nothing." A gentle smile crossed her face, and Bao Dur blinked back what suspiciously looked like tears. "That will be our foundation upon which we will build.

"Please tell Admiral Onasi that if Revan is alive, I will bring her back. I know she is, I sense it," she said, almost to herself, then her voice was strong again. "I'll find her.

"Jennet and Canderous, your union has given me so much hope for the future. With the help from you and the Clan, the Republic will be strong again. Be well, and happy. I feel certain we'll meet again in battle, and I am proud to serve with you both."

"Atton…" she paused, and swallowed. "I know you're angry, and have probably already started to prepare to follow me. You know that would be pointless. I need you to wait for me, and help the others with their tasks. You are my heart, and my home. I need both to be there when I return. Please."

Atton glared at the image, but made a short nod and looked away.

"I love you all. May the Force be with you." The holo ended, and we were all silent.

"Do you think she'll find Revan?" Jennet asked softly after a moment.

"I've never known the General to fail," Bao Dur answered. "If it can be done, she will."

"Ladria is a strong woman, and an impressive warrior," I pointed out. "She'll come through."

"And come home," Jennet added, putting a hand on Atton's arm and looking him in the eye. "She loves you."

"Yeah," Atton said bitterly, and I understood. If it had been Jennet, nothing would have kept me from going after her. But then, we had a few advantages that Atton and Ladria didn't.

"I'll see to it Admiral Onasi gets a copy of this," Bao Dur said quietly.

"You do that," I nodded. "It will give him hope."

"Hope is a good thing," Jennet said, taking my arm. "And it crops up where you least expect it."

"Well put, Wildcat," I said, and kissed her cheek.

* * *

Author's note: Well, there it is. I don't know when I'll write Ladria's and Revan's story. I'm taking a break for a while, my family has been very tolerant and deserve some undivided attention. I hope everyone has enjoyed this story. Thanks so much for the comments and support! I enjoy hearing from readers, and hope that you all will continue to read and review. It's been a wild ride! 

Always, LJ


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